


In The Dark

by Chipper99



Series: Light & In The Dark [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (Telltale Video Game)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2020-03-02 06:24:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 189,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18805534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chipper99/pseuds/Chipper99
Summary: 'He might not have encountered as many people as AJ, but he knows he's right. That desperate people will do whatever they can to help themselves, and the ones they love. The Delta was proof of that. And so was Minnie and Marlon...'Now that the Delta had been dealt with, the group now had only one thing in mind; survival.With the news of a group of survivors nearby and a mysterious new girl that shows up half-dead outside their gates, it seems impossible to know if these new changes will be their saving, or their downfall.This is a sequel to my previous fic 'Light', but can also be read seperate.





	1. Chapter 1

The sun was just beginning to crest the horizon, the usual inky blackness of the night giving way to the muted oranges of the sunrise.

Louis would consider it beautiful if he wasn't focused on the fact that he had woken up at an ungodly hour and he could potentially be walking into death.

Clementine seemed to agree.

She was sat on the edge of her bed, his nervous pacing making her feel equally as nervous, watching him from her space on the bed with a concerned frown.

"Louis, are you sure you're okay for this?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I can do this. I can. Just need to... To calm down a bit"

AJ didn't show a hint of the nerves he was feeling, examining his new pistol and flipping the safety on before tucking it away in the back of his trousers.

"Don't worry, Clem. I'll look after him." AJ assured Clementine, smiling cheekily at Louis

"I know you will, kiddo"

"Uh, shouldn't I be the one looking after you?"

Clementine and AJ share an amused glance, raising an eyebrow at one another at Louis' question.

Louis huffs in annoyance, turning to the bed and picking up one of their spare bows, securing it across his back before turning back to the two.

"You ready, bud?" He asks AJ, who nods eagerly in response.

"Yep. I'll go grab the map and wait by the gates" AJ informs him, turning and walking out of the room.

The two of them watch AJ as he goes, the door softly closing behind him once he leaves the room. Clementine stands slowly from the bed, grabbing onto the bed posts for support as she pulls herself up. Louis notices this, quickly walking over to the end of the bed to pick up her crutches and pass them to her.

Clementine smiles gratefully at him, though with a slight frown on her face as she takes in his thoughtful expression.

"What are you thinking about?"

He sighs softly, scratching the side of his neck nervously as she gazes intensely at him.

"I just... I really meant what I said. About stepping up, that I'm ready to defend our home"

"I know you did. That you are."

"For some reason I can't shake these nerves. That somethings gonna go wrong, or that I'll find a way to fuck things up."

"Thats completly normal, Lou. Especially when you're not used to these kinds of things. I've done them hundreds of times, and I still feel that way before every one." Clementine reassures Louis, stepping slightly closer to him.  
"Here, take this"

Clementine reaches into her jacket pocket, pulling out her signature knife and flipping it to hold the sharp blade, offering the handle to him.

"Are you sure? It's your knife." He asks in uncertainty, knowing Clementine will most likely kill him if he damages or loses it.

"Yes, it is. And I'm relying on you to use it to protect yourself, and to protect AJ."

Louis takes the knife carefully from her, honored she would trust him with it. He tucks her knife away in his jacket, smiling fondly down at her.

"Thanks, Clem"

Clementine returns his smile, pushing up on her toes and pressing her mouth to his softly. The tension drains out of him as he leans into her comforting touch, a small whine escaping his throat when she pulls away.

"C'mon, AJ's waiting for you."

"I think he can wait a few more minutes..."

Clementine giggles softly, giving him a playful shove as she fights off a grin at his words.

"Just remember to be quiet, be alert and be careful."

"So... Everything I'm not?"

Clementine snorts, shaking her head fondly at the freckled boy standing in front of her. Her carefree smile slips from her face, the concern she had felt earlier starting to appear once more. She steps forward, wrapping her arms around him and smiling when he immediately returns the hug, squeezing her tight.

"I'll be careful. I promise."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Had they been walking for hours? He was fairly certain they had been walking for hours.

Louis winced at the pain in his feet as they walked, the heels of his feet aching as they weren't used to walking for a long as they were. He couldn't complain though, not when AJ, who was more than ten years younger than him, was able to walk without complaint. Then again, this was probably something he had gotten used to.

The sun had risen significantly higher in the sky, bringing back some warmth to his bones that had been taken away by the early morning's chill. It wouldn't be long before winter would arrive, making their struggles of survival that much harder. He would have to bring it up with Clementine once he gets back.

The sound of paper rustling catches his attention, turning his head to see AJ unfolding the map of the school and its surrounding area.

"We getting close?" Louis asks AJ, silently praying he would say yes.

"I think so? We're near the main road, at least."

Oh, thank god.

"What do we do if they're not there?" AJ asks him as he refolds the map, placing it back in his pocket.

"Well, we'll have to search the area around where Aasim saw them. They probably would have moved from where they were. If we still find nothing, then we'll cut our losses and head back, maybe see if we can find them another time?"

AJ nods in agreement, turning his head back forward and focusing on the ground in front of him as he walks.

"But... What if we never find them?"

Louis is saved from answering by the muffled sounds of conversation from somewhere ahead. The two of them freeze in their tracks, Louis pushing AJ down into a crouch.

He spots a nearby tree that had fallen, signalling AJ to move towards it. They approach slowly, doing their best to reduce any noise they make as they walk.

Eventually, they get to the fallen tree, pressing their backs against the solid oak as they listen to the strangers conversation.

"I'm just saying, man. There doesn't seem to be anything here. We've been here a few days already, I feel like we're wasting time and gas." A gravelly voice speaks

"I know, but there isn't much else we can do. You heard what the doc said, we need those medical supplies."

Louis glances over to AJ, signalling his intention to peek around the side of the log. AJ nods, already pulling his pistol out, flipping the safety off as he does.

"Just in case" AJ whispers.

Louis peeks around the edge of the log, keeping as much of himself hidden as be possibly can. His eyes dart across the surrounding area, taking in what he can from the limited view he has.

They had made a small clearing in the forest, near to the main road of the valley. A pale, dirtied caravan sat parked nearby a collection of trees, branches haphazardly covering the sides in an attempt of camouflage.

A campfire was roaring away nearby, a small group of people sat on logs that had been placed around the fire, a fairly decent sized possum sizzling over the fire as they talked. Louis' eyes widened at the sight of the rifles strapped across their backs; clearly military grade weapons. They weren't the only weapons he could see, each member of the group equipped with a sidearm that was holstered by their hips.

Louis steps back into hiding, leaning back against the log while AJ watches him worriedly from his position.

"Is it them? How many are there?" AJ whispers, eyes darting over to where the others are.

"Yeah, they have the caravan Aasim mentioned, so, I think so. There's at least four. Well...From what I can see anyway. Might be more inside..." Louis whispers back in answer, peering around again to get another look.

"It doesn't matter. What the boss says, we do."

"Hey, I'm not saying we go against orders! I'm just saying-"

"Well _dont_ just say. Just _do_. End of discussion"

An older woman, perhaps in her late forties, was sending a near death glare at the man opposite her as she spoke. The man's mouth snapped shut at the look, unable to meet her gaze and staring down at his own feet.

"What do you see?" AJ whispers from beside him, fighting against himself to take a look.

"Well, they all have military weapons..."

"Military?"

"Oh, right, you wouldn't know. Uh.. I'll explain it later. For now, it means the rifles they have? Well, let's just say they have a bit of a kick.."

His words seem to worsen AJs worry, the boys small fingers tightening on the pistol in his hand.

"So what do we do? Do we talk to them?"

"I... I don't know. Not yet, anyway. We'll do what Clem said; stay back until we can get a read on them"

AJ opens his mouth to ask another question, but stops when the groups conversations begins once more.

"Do you really think well find another community? Out here? We're basically in the middle of nowhere, and even if we do, how likely will it be for them to have medical supplies? In case you haven't noticed, theres not much around to scrounge from."

"Not much that we've _seen_. We dont know this area, not well anyway. You never know what can be hiding around here."

"Okay... Say by some miracle there's another group out here. Say, by another miracle, that they have what we're looking for. Remind me, what exactly happened the last time we traded?"

"You don't know if it's gonna be like that again. None of us do."

"Oh yeah? And what exactly is gonna stop it from happening again? Jack shit, that's what. We barely survived the raid, now we're putting our lives at risk, everyone's lives back home at risk!"

"Everyone's lives will be in danger if we don't take this risk. We _need_ that medicine, might I remind you. We have to reach out. So I advise you shut your mouth."

The older woman before once more puts the others back in their place, the others of the group seeming to cower slightly at her commanding voice. Louis leans back again, turning to address AJ.

"On the plus side, it seems like they're looking to trade?" Louis comments, trying his best to find a positive from their conversation

"They sound like they need help. Like they're desperate, or scared... People can do bad things when they're scared"

Louis frowns at AJs words, not even able to begin to comprehend the horrors he and Clementine must have seen out there. Out in 'the wild'. He might not have encountered as many people as AJ, but he knows he's right. That desperate people will do whatever they can to help themselves, and the ones they love. The Delta was proof of that. And so was Minnie and Marlon...

"You're right, people _can_ do scary things when they're desperate. What might happen if we don't trade, though? What if they become so desperate, they don't trade, they just take? We don't stand a chance against those kinds of weapons..."

"Are we going to talk to them then?" AJ asks, clearly none too happy about the suggestion.

"Yeah... Yeah, I think that's best. See if we can talk to their leader."

"Do you know who that is?" AJ asks him, leaning over the top of the log to get a look. Louis does the same, peering over the side to observe the group.

"Oh, uh... I'm... I'm not actually too sure... Perhaps the older lady, sat in the middle? Or maybe they're still in the caravan, or-"

"Or maybe he's right behind you."

The telltale sound of a gun being cocked accompanies the man's gruff voice from behind them. Louis and AJ still in their movements, though AJs finger is twitching slightly on the trigger of his pistol, ready to pull at a moments notice.

"Don't move. Don't do anything stupid. I _really_ don't want to have to shoot you. But I will, if you give me a reason."

Louis side-glances to AJ next to him, fearing he'll receive a bullet in the back if he so much as turns his head. AJ is glancing right back at him, eyes darting from Louis to the pistol he had in his hand.

"Now, here's what you're gonna do. You're going to raise your hands where I can see them, then turn around. Nice and slow like. You move too quick, you reach for a gun, and I can assure you. I will move quicker."

AJ raises an eyebrow in questioning, glancing once again to his pistol. He knows what AJ's asking. Whether to take the shot. But it wasn't worth the risk.

Even if by some miracle AJ gets the shot off before the guy reacts, the gunshot would attract the other members of the group, as well as any surroundings walkers.

Louis shakes his head 'no' with as little movement as possible, hoping his wide-eyed expression would be enough to stop AJ. AJ looks unsure, but follows the man's instruction. The two of them lift their hands into the air as slowly as humanly possible, turning on the spot to face the man.

He looked to be around the same age as the woman in the camp, who they had mistaken as the leader. His hair was short styled, once jet black hair now flecked with gray as age had taken its toll. Forest green eyes stared down at them from the barrel of a rifle, expression alarmingly vacant, showing no sign of what the man was feeling at that moment.

"Alright. Good. Now you're gonna slowly lower the pistol to the ground, and slide it over to me."

AJ looks over to Louis, waiting for his instructions. Louis feels AJ's eyes on him, keeping his own gaze locked with the man's as he nods to AJ. AJ somewhat reluctantly complies, leaves scattering around the forest floor as he slides the gun over.

"Now you, the tall one. Take off your bow, and slide it over to me."

Louis swallow past the lump in his throat as he shakingly lifts his arms to the bow, placing it softly on the ground before pushing it towards the man.

He tries not to startle when the man suddenly steps towards him, gun trained on AJ as he reaches out to Louis' coat. He feels the man's hand pat down the sides of his coat as he looks for extra weapons. Louis' jaw clenches when his hands still on the pocket that contains Clems knife, reaching in and withdrawing the blade, tucking it away in his own trouser pocket.

He gives AJ the same treatment, patting down the younger boy while pointing the rifle at Louis. Finding nothing, he steps back, eyes squinted in suspicion at the two of them.

"Is that all your weapons?" He asks them distrustfully, looking between the two.

"Yes. You took everything." AJ answers the man's question bluntly, sending the man his own distrustful look.

The man continues to keep the rifle aimed at them for a few more agonising seconds before coming to a decision, lowering the rifle from his face. Louis breathes a small sigh of relief, thankful to no longer be at the other end of the barrel.

"I truly am sorry. Its just that you can't be too careful out here, you know? Don't know who to trust anymore." The man tells them sincerely, holding the rifle by his side. His expression had changed dramatically, face apologetic and no longer vacant of emotion.

Louis and AJ raise their eyebrows in shock, not expecting the sudden turn around of the man's attitude towards them.

"The name's Nathan, Nate if you prefer." The man tells them, raising an eyebrow when Louis and AJ don't respond.  
"And you are?"

"...Louis" Louis finally responds, still feeling unsure.

"AJ" AJ also responds, following Louis' lead.

"I don't mean to pry, but... is he your kid? I mean, you look a little young to be a dad, but... You never know." Nathan asks Louis, glancing down at AJ.

"Oh, no, no he's not." Louis answers

"Brother?"

"No. Just friends" AJ answers bluntly once more, clearly not trusting Nathan.

Nathan nods at the two of them, satisfied with their answers and cooperation.

"You two alone out here? Or you part of a group? Anywhere nearby?"

"I, uh... I don't think I know you enough to answer that." Louis tells Nathan

"Hey man, I get it. I'm not gonna ask you _where_ you are, I just want to know if you're part of a group that might be interested in trading?"

"Thats all? You don't want to know where we are, or how many? Nothing?" Louis questions in disbelief

"Nope. Not my business. Just wanna know what you've got to trade, and if you're interested. So? Are you?"

"It's actually why we're out here in the first place. We spotted you guys the other day, but, uh, didn't know whether to approach you guys or not." Louis explains. 

"Ah, I see. A scouting mission, I presume?"

"Kind of?"

Nathan chuckles at Louis' uncertain tone, turning from them and heading towards the group sat around the fire.

"Come on, let me introduce you to the others.

Louis and AJ trail behind, seeing no other alternative than to follow the man's instructions. As soon as Nathan enters the clearing, the others stand at attention, hands shooting to the side arms in the holsters when they see Louis and AJ just behind.

"Stand down, guys! They're in the clear."

The group immedietly calms at Nathan's orders, removing their hands from their holsters and leaving them hanging by their sides as they remain stood, waiting for their leader to get to them.

"Alex, Jack, I want you to perform a perimeter sweep. Unless..." Nathan turns to Louis and AJ next to him.  
"Any others of yours we don't know about?"

"Uh, no. At least, there shouldn't be" Louis answers

"Alright then. Perform the perimeter sweep, but be careful. Don't want to go shooting our new friends here, now do we?"

Two of the men Nathan was addressing nod at his commands, picking up their rifles from where they were sat and walk away out of the clearance without so much as a word. Louis and AJ watch their retreating forms before Nathan begins talking again, diverting their attention.

"Guys, this is Louis and AJ." Nathan introduces them, pointing to the two as he says their names.

"Its good to meet you. The names Nora." The older women speaks up, stepping towards Louis with a hand outstretched.

Louis shakes her hand, and her eyes widen slightly before her eyebrows furrow in confusion. She glances down to their grasped hands, spotting his missing finger.

"How on earth did that happen?"

Louis pulls his arm away, hiding his hand self consciously behind his back when he feels the others gaze on him, attempting to get a glimpse of his injury.

"Oh, you know. Hunting accident. That kind of thing..." Louis lies, not wanting to tell them about the Delta encounter. For all he knows, these guys could be member of the Delta themselves.

The woman, Nora, seems satisfied with his answer, stepping back to where she was and turning to look at the man next to her.

"Nora is sort of my 'second in command', if you will. She's who I go to for advice, things like that." Nathan tells them, turning to face the other man at the fire with a smile.  
"And _this_ is Doctor Williams." Nathan tells them with a sense of pride, placing an arm on the man's back to encourage him forward.

"Please, just call me Matt" The doctor tells them, also holding out a hand for a handshake that Louis takes without second thought.

Doctor Williams gives AJ a kind smile, bending down to the young boys height as he holds out his hand for AJ to shake. AJ eyes the doctors hand for a second before slowly reaching out to give his own hand shake.

The doctor stands back up again, and Louis feels slightly uneasy by the look of wonderment on the doctors face. The doctor notices his questioning stare, expression turning slightly sheepish.

"I'm sorry, it's just... How old are the two of you, exactly?"

That was.. A good question. Without calenders, the years tended to blend together.

"Oh, I... I don't know exactly but around seventeen or eighteen, I suppose?" Louis answers honestly, thinking back to how many years have passed since the outbreak.

"And what about you, young man?" Doctor Williams asks AJ

"Six. I think..." AJ replies, not looking too confident with his own answer.

"I did think you were around the age, but.. I wasn't too sure..." The doctor trails off slightly, looking over to Nathan.

"That means... You were born after this all started?" Nathan asks, seemingly saddened by the realisation.  
"You never experienced the old world?"

"No, I didn't..."

"Extraordinary..." Nathan murmers to himself

Louis raises an eyebrow in questioning at the reaction to AJ's statement, waiting for an added explanation as to why they found it as "extraordinary" as they did.

"Don't get me wrong, it's a shame you didn't get to see the old world! But... But to survive out here? The fact that you're here right now, alive, is just... Well it's..."

"Extraordinary?" Louis interrupts in amusement at Nathan's ramblings.

Nathan chuckles at this, shrugging his shoulders in response. His eyes slide over to Louis, settling on him for a while as he thinks.

"Are you the one taking care of him? The one that raised him, I mean?"

"I suppose I'm helping take care of him now but no, I wasn't the one who raised him."

"Is the person who did still alive?"

"Why does it matter?" AJ asks, the distrust he had felt earlier returning at Nathan's invasive questions.

Nathan sighs slightly, running a hand through his hair as he takes a seat on one of the logs behind him, waving out an hand in invitation for Louis and AJ to do the same. The two wait for the others to sit before taking their own seat, facing Nathan across the burning fire.

"I know my questions seem odd, but..." Nathan stops speaking, casting a worried look to the others.

"It's your call, boss" Nora says to Nathan, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her legs.

"Alright. Truth is... We need help. Now, I'm not sure how much you heard back there, but a few weeks ago, we were attacked."

"How badly?" Louis asks, his answer mostly questioned by the grim look on their faces.

"It was... It was a massacre, to be frank. We lost so many of our own. So many loved ones, I..."

Their eyes are cast downwards, Nathan's fists clenched by his side as he relives the memories.

"They stole whatever they could find. Luckily, they didn't take everything. But there is one set of supplies they hit the hardest: medical supplies. This is why we're looking to trade, along with being out on supply runs pretty far outside our usual zone."

"We have a lot of wounded, and no supplies to help them. If we don't find any medical supplies soon? I really don't think they'll make it much longer." Doctor Williams adds grimly

"One of our people back home, she, uh..." Nathan trails off with a small chuckle, scratching absentmindedly at the stubble on his chin.  
"She's pregnant, if you can believe it. Pregnant, in this world! Everyone back home is all a bit jumpy at the moment, trying to figure out how the hell we're gonna raise a baby in the apocalypse, of all things"

Nathan's prying questions from before begin to make more sense, why he wanted to know more about how AJ was raised, about who raised him.

"So, we're not just trading for supplies, we're trading for information. I would really love to meet with the boys parents, or whoever raised him and... Find out a little more, you know?"

The 'information' part wasnt something he was expecting, that was for sure. But... Trading is trading, right? This was the whole reason Clementine sent them out here in the first place.

"Listen, I get it. Its a tough call. How about this." Nathan begins, pulling out his own map of the surrounding area, unfolding the large piece of paper and showing it to Louis.

"This, right here? Is where we are right now. You able to remember that? Good. Now, our plan for the rest of the day is to head out down the main road, this way" Nathan states, trailing a finger down the road heading south.

"We're gonna search for whatever supplies we can. Tomorrow, we'll be back here for the whole day to rest before we head back home.  
If you wanna make something out of this" Nathan says, waving a hand between the two of them.  
"Then I ask of you to bring three things. First; your leader."

"Wait, how do you know I'm not the leader?" Louis asks him, suprised he had jumped to conclusions so quickly.

"No offense kid, but you don't seem like the leader type."

"A little taken..." Louis mutters under his breath

"Plus, you seem like smart guys. I would take a guess that means you're a smart group. And a smart group wouldn't risk their leader on a simple scouting trip."

"But arent _you_ this groups leader? If it isn't smart, why are you out on a scouting trip?" AJ asks

"Touché" Nathan responds with a chuckle, looking over to AJ.  
"But this isn't just a scouting trip. People are more likely to trade when talking to the leader directly. Sign of good faith, and all that."

"Makes sense."

"Right, so... Firstly; your leader. Secondly; whatever supplies you're willing to trade. We've got what supplies _we're_ willing to trade back in the caravan, plus we might have more once we come back from our scavenging trip.  
Lastly; Whoever raised AJ. I would really appreciate getting to talk to them, getting some advice.  
So, we're gonna be here all day tomorrow. Today you can go back, talk to whoever is in charge, and make a decision as to what you want to do.  
If we see you tomorrow, then great! If not, we'll assume you want nothing to do with us and won't bother you ever again. Sound fair?"

"You're just... letting us go, then?" AJ asks.

"Of course..." Nathan replies, slightly bewildered by the question  
"What, you thought I was going to take you prisoner?"

"Maybe?"

Nathan looks to AJ sadly, shaking his head at the boys answer.

"Of course I won't. Wouldn't be the best start to our relationship if I locked you up, now would it?" Nathan asks jokingly, standing from his seat by the fire. Louis and AJ stand as well, waiting for Nathan's next move.

"Oh, I believe this is yours?" Nathan says as he reaches his hand into his trouser pocket, withdrawing Clementines knife and handing it back to Louis. Louis takes it thankfully, feeling much more relaxed now he had Clems weapon back safely in hand.

"Your bow and gun should be where you left them, behind the log."

"Thank you." Louis tells him sincerely, sticking out his hand once more.

Nathan takes his hand, giving it a shake as he smiles at the two of them. Doctor Williams and Nora stand just behind Nathan, waiting to give their own goodbye handshakes to the two.

"I really hope we see you tomorrow. I think this could be a good thing, if we let it happen." Nathan tells them as they drop their hands back to their sides.  
"Until then, this is goodbye."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sound of her crutches clicking against the hardwood floor echo throughout the school. Unable to do much else, Clementine found herself wandering the schools halls. With nothing to distract herself with, her mind was constantly preoccupied with Louis and AJ and how they were doing.

The sky was beginning to darken, and they were yet to return from their scouting mission. She knows that Louis and AJ are both plenty capable, but it does nothing to dampen the ever steadily rising panic in her chest at the thought that something had gone wrong out there.

She comes back to her senses, realising she had made her way down to the music room without even knowing it. Louis' piano is sat where it always is, the last rays of the day's sunshine shining on its surface through the slightly murky window panes; glass covered in a light coating of dirt and grime after nearly a decade of remaining unwashed.

Clementine makes her way over, sitting down in front of the grand piano and gently wiping a hand across the top. Her hand drifts to her and Louis' carving before settling on the keys, a small smile on her face at the memory of the music the keys would produce.

Her curiosty gets the better of her, pressing down on a random key, feeling slightly foolish for jumping at how loud the note plays. Her hand goes to another key, pressing down once more, listening to the resulting sound. She repeats this again and again at random, taking joy in the sounds of the piano.

"You know, for a second there you were playing so bad I thought Louis was back."

Clementine chuckles at Violets comment, turning to her right to see the blonde approaching from the doorway, making her way over to where Clementine was sat cautiously.

Clementine doesn't offer help, knowing it would just insult Violet more. Instead she scans the floor Violet walks on, making sure there's nothing she could trip up on as she makes her way over.

"Not to sound creepy, but I've been following you round for a bit. You seem to be... Wandering? Are you okay?" Violet asks once she gets to her, leaning against the piano.

"I don't know... I mean, yes, but..."

"Worrying about Louis and AJ?"

Clementine nods solemnly in response.

"I know I shouldn't. They're both plenty capable, and it's not like it's a particularly difficult or dangerous mission, its just that... Its just that I don't like not being out there there. Feeling like I should be helping, but cant."

"Yeah, I kinda know what you mean" Violet says with a sad chuckle, lifting a hand to wave at her own face and the bandages that cover most of it

"God, Vi, I... I really am sorry about that. I should never have-"

"Stop. Just... Stop. We've been over this. I never should have blamed you, back on the boat. This wasn't your fault.  
I was the one that was too stubborn to listen to your warning, to think I could be the one to stop the bomb before it went off. This is on me." Violet assures her, taking a seat next to her by the piano. 

"I wish I could have done something different that night; when Lilly first attacked. I kept thinking about it over and over again, about how there must have been someway to save you."

"There wasn't, Clem. If you hadn't shot that raider that was fighting Louis, he would have been captured too, or... Or shot.

That awful night was forever ingrained into her memory, yet another set of horrific events to add to her ever growing nightmares; the coppery smell of blood that coated the ground around Mitch, the searing heat of the flames formed from the Deltas molotovs, the sickening sound of the raiders bones crunching under the weight of the bricks, the terrifying sight of Louis backed up against a cage, rifle pressed into his chest, Violet just on the other side scrambling for purchase on the ground as she's dragged by the back of her shirt.

"Sometimes it feels like whenever I go, trouble follows. That any group unlucky enough to cross paths with me will all end up with the same fate." Clementine admits guilty, thinking back to all those she had lost, all those that died either for her, or simply by knowing her.

"You know, that's actually what Lilly told me" Violet tells her.  
"Back on the boat. She and... And Minnie... They were doing whatever they could to get me to hate you, to join their side.  
They tried to pin everything on you. Said a bunch of bullshit about how no one would have died or been injured if you were never there. And I was still feeling so hurt, so betrayed that I believed them. Believed we would all be okay if I just did what they told me to do."

"Maybe Lilly was right. Maybe you all would have been better off without me... "

"No, Clem. She wasn't. You know what would have happened if you never arrived? We would never have found out about Marlon, about who he truly was. We would never have known about the raiders, until they stormed our gates and took us all. We would _never_ have stood a chance against them without you. We would be training to fight their war as we speak, maybe even dead already.  
Instead? Here we are, still in the school, and _safe_. That's all because of you, Clem. I couldn't see that back then, but I sure as hell do now."

Clementine looks to Violet in astonishment, not expecting such kind words from her, especially knowing how difficult it was for Violet to open up about these kinds of things.

"I just... I needed you to know that" Violet finishes, somewhat embarrassed about her words.

"Vi, I... I don't know what to say. Thank you, so much."

"You're welcome" Violets responds with a small smile, desperately trying to find something to look at other than Clementine. She eventually settles on the carving in the piano, reaching out and tracing her fingers across the letters.

"'C' and 'L'... Clementine and Louis. When did Louis add this?" Violet asks her curiously, now tracing the ragged heart that surrounded the letters.

"It was shortly after that card game. The night you were..."

_You were taken_

Violet remains quiet, pulling her fingers back away from the carving in the piano and placing her hands in her lap and fiddling with them nervously, as Tenn once would.

"You know, I, uh... I actually had a bit of a crush on you, before..." Violet admits quietly, staring down at her hands as she fiddled with them. Clementine raises an eyebrow in surprise, but stays silent, waiting for Violet to continue.  
"It was kind of hard for me to admit it to myself, y'know? I was still mourning for Minnie, and then suddenly you show up and I start getting all these feelings and... It felt wrong. It felt like admiting I liked you was a betrayal to Minnie, that I had just... Moved on, like she never existed."

"Why didn't you tell me? Talked to me about it?" Clementine asks her softly.

"I was going to. With the raiders coming I thought 'Fuck it, might as well go for it, right?' Then that game of truth or dare happened and... And I saw it."

"You saw it?"

Violet chuckles faintly, shaking her head in slight amusement.

"I had always seen the way Louis looked at you. Poor guy couldn't be any more obvious. He would look at you like you were his world, the biggest damn heart eyes everytime he so much as glanced at you."

Clementine smiles fondly at her words, unable to stop the blush that appeared at her cheeks upon thinking of Louis' affections towards her.

"There. That's what I mean, thats what I saw."

"What?" Clementine asks in confusion

"That look right there. You had the exact same look as him. Even just thinking about him, you get all like... Well, that.  
Louis is... He's my best friend. And don't tell him I said that, his ego can only get so big."

Clementine snorts in amusement, caught off guard by the comment while Violet laughs quietly with her.

"He's my best friend. I saw how much he liked you, how much you liked him and it would be unfair to him for me to complicate things by telling you I liked you. So, I didn't."

"Oh..."

The room falls into an awkward silence after Violets confession, neither knowing what to say to one another. Violet resumes fiddling with her fingers whilst Clementine stares somewhat blankly at her and Louis' carving, still taking in Violets words.

"I want you to know, I'm happy for you guys. Really, I am. Louis was already a pretty happy guy, but... its different with you. His smiles seem more genuine, more open.  
Honestly, I'm just glad you guys don't act all 'over the top cutesy'. At least, not around everyone else, that is. Unlike _some_ people. Not even being half blind could save me from having to see Aasim and Ruby feeding eachother at dinner... "

Clementine laughs, feeling the awkwardness between the two of them drain away at Violets joke.

"Speaking of, dinner should be ready soon. I think...You never know with Omar. You heading outside?"

"I will. I'm going to head upstairs to the office first, look over a few things."

"You need any help getting up there?" Violet offers, glancing down at the crutches that rested by the piano.

"I'll be fine, thanks. I'll see you out there?"

"See you out there." Violet confirms with a smile as she stands from the piano, giving Clementine a small wave goodbye before turning and making her way out of the room.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A cold breeze entered the room from the shattered window leading out to the balcony, dusty curtains blowing from the gentle push of the wind.

Clementine found herself drawn out to the balcony, stopping just before the broken railing. It wasn't all that long ago she went tumbling over its side, her life possibly saved by the raider she had landed on. Abel, who she had later killed down in the basement after he begged for mercy, begged her not to let him turn.

Dinner was indeed ready to be served, the slightly muted voice of Omar beckoning everyone over for their meal. Clementine watched over the edge of the balcony as the others eagerly approach, bowl in hand to get their serving before spreading out to the picnic tables.

Their food situation had improved slightly since the safe zone restrictions had been lifted. In a way, the safe zone had actually helped, as it had given the wildlife outside the safe zone a chance to recover and repopulate, meaning they now had more to hunt.

That could easily change, however. Many of the animals would struggle with the coming winter, and their dwindling population will result in less food for the group. If they were lucky, Louis and AJ would return with good news; a chance of a new relationship with another community, perhaps even the opportunity for trade.

Clementine nearly jumps out of her skin when a pair of arms suddenly grab her by her waist. Years of survival instincts kick in, jabbing her elbow back into the assailants ribcage as hard as she can. The person grunts in pain, the air taken out of them by the hit. She doesn't give them a chance to recover, turning on the spot and shoving their chest, sending them careening to the floor.

Her hands go instinctively to her pocket in search of her knife, cursing herself when she remembers she had given it to Louis earlier and had no weapon to defend herself with.

"I'm about eighty percent sure you broke a rib..." A familiar voice groans from the floor, sprawled out on their back and eyes closed in pain.

"Oh my god, Louis? Shit, I'm so sorry" Clementine apologises, swiftly hopping forward to help him up.

Louis is already clambered up to his knees once she gets to his side, offering him a hand up. He grabs her hand, though she can tell he isnt using her for any help, most likely fearing his weight will be too much for her when she's only on one leg.

Clementine doesn't leg go of his hand once he stands, instead pulling him towards her to wrap her arms around him, burrowing her head in his chest as her hands scrunch into the old and tattered material of his trench coat. Louis returns the hug just as heartily, feeling his soft and quiet chuckle vibrate through his chest from where she rests her head.

"I thought AJ was the only one I couldn't sneak up behind on" Louis jokes as they part from the hug, rubbing the sore spot on his side.

"I know, I'm sorry I-- Wait, where is AJ?" Clementine questions, worry creeping up when she realises AJ hadn't followed Louis into the room.

"Don't worry, he's perfectly fine. We're both fine. He's getting some food, see?" Louis says as he steps towards the edge of the balcony, pointing down to the ground below.

She doesn't feel truly reassured until she actually catches sight of him; stood by the cast iron pot that hung over the schools fire, waiting patiently as Omar ladels stew into his bowl.

"What, you didn't think I could keep him safe? I'm offended, Clem. I truly am." Louis teased, placing a hand over his heart in fake hurt.

"Come on, you know I wasn't thinking that. I had complete faith in you, in the both of you. That's not going to stop me from worrying..."

"I know you do." Louis reassures her, eyes soft and warm as he gazes down at her.

"So" Clementine begins, snapping the both of them out of their daze  
"How did it go? What did you find out?"

Louis tenses slightly, rubbing the back of his neck in the way she knew meant he was nervous about something. Or nervous about _telling_ her something...

"Louis? What happened?" She demands sternly, leaning against the desk behind her with arms crossed.

"Well... Uh... Promise you won't get mad?"

"That depends"

"On?"

"On what you did"

"Thats not exactly reassuring, Clem"

"Louis..."

"Okay, okay! It _was_ going fine. We found them, Clem. They're still out there."

"And you kept your distance?"

"Yeah! Well, at first..."

"At first?"

"I was doing what you said! We kept back, we were quiet, just sat and listened to what they were saying. I can assure you, I _definitely_ kept quiet when I saw the military rifles strapped to their back..."

"Military rifles?" Clementine asks fearfully, paling slightly at the prospect of a group so heavily armed being nearby.

"And sidearms." Louis adds, fueling her fear.

"Shit... Did you manage to hear what they were saying?"

"Bits and pieces. They were attacked recently, group of raiders. They lost a lot of their people, and a lot of their supplies"

"That must be why they're out here, searching for supplies. Just have to hope they don't stumble across us..." Clementine mutters tiredly, placing a hand over her face as she thinks about defence plans

"Yeah... About that...While me and AJ were hiding their leader sort of found us..."

Clementine stared blankly at Louis' shamed expression for a few seconds, sighing in exasperation as she walks around the desk, pulling out the chair and taking a seat.

"Well, fuck... Did you tell them anything?"

"No! I didn't say anything about how many of us their are, or where we are. In fact, he didn't even want to know"

"Really? He didn't want to know _anything_ about us?" Clementine asked in disbelief

"Not really, there's only a couple of things he's interested in. Some of them were... Weird..." Louis tells her, recalling his and Nathan's previous conversation

"Weird? What did he say?"

"He said they were interested in trading, mainly for medical supplies."

"Thats exactly what we were hoping to hear. What's weird about that?"

"They were oddly interested in AJ. I mean, it seemed odd at first, but, they told us they have a pregnant woman back in their community, and they wanted to talk to our leader as well as whoever had raised AJ which, y'know, are both you."

"That doesn't really explain why they want to talk to me"

"From what I can tell, they've never raised a kid before, let alone in this world. I think they just want some advice." Louis pulls out the map he had taken from AJ, unfolding it and placing it on the table in front of Clementine.

He grabs a nearby pencil, circling the spot Nathan had pointed out earlier that day.

"This is where we ran into them. Their leader, Nathan, proposed for us to return with three things; our leader, what we're willing to trade and whoever raised AJ. Two of those things are you, the other, well, we still need to figure out what we can trade.  
Nathan said they had what _they_ were willing to trade stored in the caravan, and are going on one last scouting trip before they head home."

"Did they say where 'home' is? Or where they're scouting?"

"Nope, and I didn't ask. Didn't seem fair when they didnt ask where we were. All I know is they're travelling south tomorrow, then coming back down the same road toward their home, so it's probably somewhere up North since that's where the road leads."

"Why did they tell you which way they're heading?"

"It was to let us know that he and his group would be waiting here tomorrow" Louis says as he points to the circle he had drawn on the map.  
"He could tell we were unsure about trading, so he said him and his group would wait here tomorrow to see if we show up and trade. If we don't, he assumes we're not interested and won't bother us again."

"You think he was telling the truth? That we can trust him on his word?" Clementine asks nervously, hating the fact she couldn't have gone to get a read on the leader herself.

"I mean, I don't see why not?" Louis answers with a shrug of his shoulders.  
"They don't know where we are, so it would be difficult for them to find the school if they wanted to attack. It's worth a try, right?"

"I suppose so..." Clementine murmered, studying the area of the map the caravan was.

"I'm sensing a 'but' here."

"It's just that... They want to see the leader"

"Which is you" Louis clarifies, slightly confused as to where Clementine was going with this.

"Thats the problem, though. Its going to be difficult for me to walk all the way out there _and_ back, and I don't exactly look like the strongest right now."

"What do you mean?"

"Say that this Nathan guy is lying. Say he actually plans on raiding the school. He asks to see the leader, and I show up? He's going to think we're easy pickings."

"Clem, you're the strongest person I know, even without a leg. Hell, you managed to shove me to the ground no problem, and _I_ was the one who caught _you_ off guard. Trust me, once he meets you, he'll know not to mess with you."

Clementine snorts at his statement, amused yet oddly flattered by his words. He's smiling kindly at her, though his eyes seem tired, noticing the way he held himself like he was ready to drop.

"You okay?" She asks with a frown, standing from the desk.

"Yeah, just a little tired." Louis admits to her, flattered by her concern.

"Should probably go get some dinner and sleep. Another long day ahead of us. I want you to come with me, possibly Ruby as well to go over medical supplies. I'll have to talk to her in the morning before we go..." Clementine voices her thoughts out loud as she exits the room, Louis by her side as they make this way outside to join dinner.

"You're not bringing AJ?" Louis asks slightly shocked, trying to think of a time where he didn't see the two connected by the hip.

"No, I want to find out a bit more about these guys, about why they're so interested in AJ. Something about it just rubs me the wrong way..."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Louis pushes the door to Clementine and AJ's room open, stepping slightly to the side to let Clementine enter. He steps in just after her, greeted by the sight of AJ packing a few things into a spare bag.

"What'cha doin' there, AJ?" Clementine questions with a tone of amusement

"Clem!" AJ shouts excitedly, rushing forward to hug Clementine, nearly knocking her over in the process.

Louis has a smile on his face as he closes the door softly behind them, turning back to face the two.

"So, did you have a good time with Louis?"

"Yeah! It was pretty scary when the man pointed the rifle at us, but Louis totally handled it! He didn't even have to use a gun or anything! Just talked! It was pretty cool."

"Thanks for the compliment, little man." Louis expresses his gratitude, glancing down at the bag AJ was packing before they had entered.  
"What are _you_ doing?"

"Oh, right! Willy invited me for a sleepover! I've never been to a sleepover before. Can I go Clem? Please?" AJ begs Clementine with his hands clasped and all.

"Of course you can. Just make sure you don't stay up too late, okay?"

"Thanks, Clem!" AJ shouts gleefully, practically jumping in happiness and excitement as he grabs his bag, rushing out of the room.

"He seems excited" Louis comments as he watches AJ bound out of the room.

"It's nice to see. Don't often get to see him act like a kid, as he should."

"Yeah...yeah it is. Honestly, I'm glad to see him and Willy are getting along as well as they are."

"I think he's just looking for a friend that's near his age. Especially now with Tenn..."

Clementines mouth snaps shut after she says his name, the atmosphere in the room souring slightly at the reminder of Tenn.

"I... Uh... I should be heading out. Like you said, busy day tomorrow, right?" Louis mutters awkwardly, staring down at his feet. He turns away from her, making his way over to the door of the room and lifting a hand to grab the handle of the door.

"Louis, wait"

He pauses in his movements, dropping his hand from the handle and looking over his shoulder at her, waiting for her to continue.

"Could you stay the night?"


	2. Chapter 2

Whilst usually cranked open, the single window to the room had been secured shut to stop the autumns evening chill breeze from entering the room. It meant the room felt a little stuffier than usual, but being a bit too hot would be better than shivering throughout the night.

It was unusually quiet without AJ in the room. Not in the way of noise, just in the way that his lack of presence could be felt. Clementine had been separated from him all day, so also not having him here during the night felt....unsettling.

Not that she was alone, though.

Louis was laid on his back in her bunk, his chest rising and falling with each soft breath. Clementine was curled into his side, his arms wrapped securely around her while her head rested on his chest, listening to the calming sound of his heart beating.

She wondered if he was sleeping, of what he was dreaming of. Was it a nice dream? Maybe he was dreaming of spending time with those he had lost, of getting to see Marlon, Brody, Mitch, Tenn and countless of other faceless names she didn't know of. Or perhaps he was dreaming of life before the walkers, before he was sent to the school.

The school... 'Ericsons Boarding School for Troubled Kids'. For some reason, she had never thought about there being a reason Louis was here. What made him 'troubled'. Of all the different scenarios she _could_ have thought of for him being sent here, the actual reason was one she had never seen coming.

It was... Horrifying, if she was being honest. How far he was willing to go, how far he _had_ gone to break up his parents marriage, all because he was upset with his father over something as simple as singing lessons. Music meant a lot to Louis, she knows that, but to do such a thing, and at such a young age? It was impressive and terrifying all at the same time.

And yet, some guilty part of her was glad he had done it. For if he hadn't, he might never have been sent to this school, he wouldn't have been here when the world went to shit, and she would never have met him.

"Louis?" Clementine whispers, testing to see if he was awake or not

"Hmmm?" He hums sleepily in response, eyes still closed.

"Do you... Nevermind, its not important..."

This gets Louis to open his eyes, shifting slightly where he laid so he could look down at her, his eyes groggy but now very much alert.

"Come on, you can tell me"

"No, it's fine. It was stupid." She brushes him off, laying her head back down on his chest.

"Aw, come on Clem. You can't tease me with a question and then not tell me it."

She chuckles lightly at this, lifting her head back up to stare into his eyes, his sincere and kind gaze making her feel more reassured to speak her mind.

"If all of this never happened, if the dead didn't come back to life and I didn't stumble across you guys-"

"More like _crashed_ into us..."

"Do you think we still would have met? If the world had stayed the way it was?" She finishes her musings, pretending not to have heard his input.

Louis' face breaks into a sleepy grin, tightening his hold on her before he answers.

"Well, duh! We're soul mates, Clem. We were destined to find each other, I have no doubt about that."

"Oh, really? You honestly believe we were 'destined' to find each other?" She asks sarcastically.

"Honestly? No idea" He admits with a shrug of his shoulders, smiling at her annoyed glare.  
"I suppose it all depends on what we would be doing."

"What we would be doing?"

"Yeah, you know, if I had got out of this school, what jobs we would get after."

"God, jobs... I had nearly forgotten about money."

"It's weird, isn't it? How useless money is now. It was all I knew of, growing up. And now it's just useless pieces of paper, better used to start a fire more than anything."

Clementine hums in agreement, thinking back to the times where she would wait for her parents to come home from their jobs. While she loved the company of Sandra, she always loved her parents more, her young brain not understanding why it was they had to go to work, why money was something they needed.

"What job would you have wanted? Any hobbies that could have led to a career?" Louis' question snaps her out of her memories.

"Oh... Hmmm... I'm not too sure. I was too young to really have any hobbies, exactly. Not too sure there was jobs for being a princess"

Louis laughs heartily, imagining a little Clementine running playfully around with a tiara on her head while wearing an extravagant dress.

"Oh, I can see it now. I bow to thee, Queen Clem! I shall forever be one of thou's greatest servants, at your command" Louis declares dramatically, sending the two of them into a fit of giggles.

"I always used to love playing around with my dad's camera, though. I'd always send him into fits of anxiety whenever I touched it, but... I really loved taking pictures of whatever I could" Clementine says once their laughter had died down.

"Well, there you go, then. I bet you'd be sent to some fancy art college on a scholarship and be top of your class in photography"

"Oh, yeah? And would I meet you there too?"

"Pfft, yeah right. I probably would have rebelled against going to college as some sort of agenda against my dad. I'd like to imagine me and Marlon would have started a band"

"A band? Seriously?"

"Hell yeah!"

"Who would be the singer?"

"Do you even have to ask that? It would be yours truly, of course!"

"Alright, alright. So would it just be you and Marlon?"

"Of course not! Marlon would only be able to play guitar, we would need more than that! I say Mitch would be on drums, he always did like finding 'explosive' ways to get out his energy."

"Yeah, Mitch would suit drums." Clementine agrees fondly.

"Violet and Minnie would be my back up singers"

"Violet can sing?"

"She likes to pretend she can't, but I've caught her singing once or twice before."

Clementine and Louis go quiet, the two of them picturing the life Louis was putting forward.

"Hey, that's how I would meet you!" Louis suddenly shouts, interrupting their daydream.

"What?"

"We would hire you as a photographer for our band! That's how we would meet! You'd make us look good, and I would serande you with my alluring voice."

"Oh, definitely" Clementine agrees with a small laugh  
"I mean, that's how you got me in _this_ life"

"Really?"

"The second I heard you sing 'Oh my darling' completly off key accompanied by your out of tune piano? For sure, you had me"

"Hey!" Louis complains, though is unable to stop the laugh that bubbles out of him at her teasing words.  
"Either way, no matter what life might have been like, I'm just glad to have met you in this one, Clementine"

Her lips curl into a small smile, that familiar fuzzy feeling in her chest she usually feels around him returning at his words. She pushes herself up slightly, secretly revelling in the satisfied sigh she hears from Louis once her lips meet his, feeling his reluctance when she pulls away. Her head returns to his chest, taking satisfaction in the way his heart was now pounding away under his ribcage.

"Goodnight, Lou"

"Night, Darling"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ruby wasn’t all too happy about being woken up so early at first, though her attitude quickly changed when Clementine and Louis explained the situation of trading to her. Clementine barely got out “I was wondering if you could gather what medical supplies we can-“ before Ruby had rushed past them in the doorway, away to wherever it was she stored the medical supplies and leaving behind a slightly bewildered Clementine and Louis standing outside her door.

“So…what’s next, boss?” Louis asks after a few moments of watching in amusement at Ruby’s retreating form

“I need to go find AJ, tell him about the plan. I get the feeling he’s not going to be very happy about being left behind…”

Clementine, as it turns out, was spot on.

“What do you mean its not safe? You sent me with Louis yesterday, what makes this any different?” AJ argued his case, arms crossed in defiance after Clementine explains the plan to him.

“It’s…it’s just different”

“But _how_ is it different?”

“It just is, AJ. I want you to stay here, where its safe. Please, can you do that for me?” Clementine pleads to AJ.

Louis can tell that Clementine’s begging tones are getting through to AJ, the young boy always feeling the need to follow his mother figures orders. But he can still see the defiance in AJ’s eyes, the need to help battling with the need to follow her instructions.

Louis steps forward towards AJ, crouching down to match his height while Clementine steps back slightly to give him room.

“Hey, buddy. I actually have a job for you to do, if you want to?”

This piques AJ’s interest, the young boy taking his angered glare off the floor to look up at Louis’ face in curiosity.

“What is it?”

“I feel _really_ uncomfortable leaving the school, especially with Violet as vulnerable as she is right now. But, uh…don’t tell her I said that, she could still kick my ass” Louis leans slightly closer to whisper fearfully, eliciting a childish giggle from AJ.

“Now, I’m not saying that Aasim, Omar and Willy aren’t good at keeping the school safe, but I think we both know who the _real_ protector of this school is.” Louis says with a wink, giving AJ a small playful punch to the shoulder before he stands.  
“So, can I count on you to protect the rest?”

It works just as planned, AJ’s annoyed grimace turning to determination at Louis’s words, nodding his head enthusiastically at the prospect of defending the school.

“Yeah! I can protect the others” AJ beams with excitement

Louis smiles back gleefully, holding out a hand to AJ for a high five. AJ slaps his hand as hard as he possibly can, to which Louis shakes his hand in mock pain that gets a proud grin out of AJ.

“I’m gonna go on patrol!” AJ declares, rushing inside to the dorms to collect his pistol.

“Be careful!” Clementine shouts after him in exasperation, shaking her head affectionately once AJ disappears into the building.  
“Thank you for that. Sometimes I just don’t know how to get through to him…” Clementine admits both to him and herself with a sense of sadness.

“No problem.”

“Its just…I remember how its like. Being young and wanting to help but being told you can’t, that you’re not strong enough or that its ‘not worth the risk’. How _annoying_ it was to hear that. And yet here I am, doing exactly that…”

“Well, you sort of have to, you know? As annoying as I’m sure it was to hear, it meant the people that said those things to you care for you, just as you care for AJ.” Louis consoles her, placing a gentle hand on her back.

“I suppose so” Clementine concedes to his point grudgingly, turning to face him.  
“I hope he understands why”

“I’m sure he will. Perhaps not now but, as he gets older, he’ll understand. You’re forgetting he’s a kid, he’ll probably have forgotten all about it by the time we get back. _Especially_ if we come back with a bag of new supplies.”

“Yeah, _if_ …” Clementine murmured, still sounding unsure about the prospect of a trade with the new group.

“Like I said, we’ve gotta try, right? What’s the worst that could happen?”

Clementine turns her head to gaze out of the schools gates, a pensive look on her face as she observes the forest just on the other side.

“You have no idea…”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The three of them made their trek along the forest path towards the meet up spot on the map. Louis walked at the front of the group, being the only one out of the three of them that was familiar with the area and would be able to recognise the members of Nathans group, just in case they ran into other strangers on their way.

Louis would throw worried glances over his shoulder to the other two every now and then as he walked. Ruby was in charge of the medical supplies they had brought with them for trade, having piled the medical supplies into Clementine’s old backpack that, before now, served no further use. Ruby still had an agitated expression, clearly still unhappy about the tense argument she had had with Aasim not too long ago.

Aasim was…unhappy to hear he wouldn’t be coming with them, to say the least. He didn’t like the idea of Ruby going with them when he can’t be there to ‘protect’ her, which did not settle with Ruby well, arguing with Aasim about how he thought she wasn’t capable of going on such a mission. Clementine was the only one that could level with Aasim, pointing out that him and Omar were the only other older kids available to help defend the school, especially with Violet still struggling to adjust to her new life without perfect vision. Clementine’s point was enough to simmer Aasim’s temper, reluctantly agreeing with her words. He had attempted to apologise to Ruby after the fight, though it seemed that Ruby still hadn’t _completely_ forgiven Aasim for the outburst.

Clementine was trying her best to pretend everything was okay, though he could still see the pained grimace on her face every now and then. She was clearly exhausted and in a lot of pain from the use of the crutches, but of course this was Clementine after all, so she would never say out loud how much agony she was actually in.

Louis checked the map, seeing they were still around an hour away from the designated meet up spot. He glanced back worriedly at Clementine, knowing she wont ever ask for a break and would just end up running herself down, trying to prove she was still capable of doing everything that she used to do.

He slows down in his pace, Clementine and Ruby giving him a questioning look once they reach his side. He passes the map to Ruby, giving a nod of his head to indicate for her to take the lead for a moment. Thankfully, Ruby gets the hint that he wants to talk to Clementine for a bit, taking the map from his hands and fastening her own pace, leaving the two of them slightly behind.

“Hey, how are you doing?” He asks, wincing in sympathy at the way her arms would shake with every step of the crutches.

“I’m fine” She answers briskly, pushing through the pain.

“Come on, Clem. Its me you’re talking to. You don’t have to pretend with me.”

“I’m _fine_ ” She repeats herself once more, putting emphasis on the word. Louis is staring intensly at her, but she refuses to meet his gaze, instead focusing on the path ahead she walks.

“Hey” He says gently, placing a tentative hand on her arm to bring her to a stop. She looks frustrated to have to stop but turns to face him none the less.

He lets his eyes do the talking, brow furrowed in distress as he studies her hardened expression, a clear cover up to mask how she was truly feeling. His concerned expression seems to get through to her, seeing the pain in her eyes as the mask begins to break. She quickly turns away from him, not wanting him to see her weaker side.

“I _hate_ this” She spits angrily, taking him slightly by surprise  
“I was so sure this was something I could do. I knew it would be hard, but I really thought it was something I could adjust to. Look at me, I can’t even walk without being in pain.”

“What are you talking about? Of course this is something you can do!”

“I thought so, too. But now… Now all this is proving is that I’ve become a liability, What use am I to anyone? To the group?”

“Tell me something, Clem” Louis begins, grabbing Clementine’s attention.  
“Was it your leg that decided you should sacrifice everything to look after AJ? Was it your leg that devised an extravagant plan to sneak into a heavily armed boat to rescue a group of people you barely knew, to reach out to another community for an opportunity to trade?”

“No…?” Clementine says, confused as to where he was going with this.

“No, it wasn’t. All of that, everything that makes you, y _ou_ , everything that I fell in love with is all _h_ _ere_ ” Louis states, pointing up at her head.

“I’m not saying its easy. God, I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it must be for you, to have to learn how to live like this. But what I _do_ know is that I love you, and I’m going to help you get through this anyway I can.”

Clementine gives him a slightly tearful smile, a smile that he returns when he feels the warm touch of her hand on his cheek, leaning forward to softly brush his lips against hers.

“You always seem to know the right thing to say”

“I know. Aren’t I just a gift to this world?”

Clementine chuckles at his attempt to cheer her up, pulling her head back slightly from him with a fond smile, looking into his warm eyes.

“That you are”

Her bold words make him feel slightly abashed, looking away from her gaze in slight embarrassment, though unable to stop the sheepish smile that creeps onto his face.

“Hey! I have an idea!” Louis announces quite suddenly, startling Clementine out of the moment.  
“How about in future trips, we take you out on the horse we got from the Delta? It means you can get around easier without having to worry about being in pain! It might take some time to teach you to ride, but, I’m sure Ruby will be eager to teach you!”

“That’s… Actually a pretty good idea. Although there’s no need to teach me, I already know how to ride”

“Wait, really? When did you learn how to ride a horse?”

“Few years ago, while I was looking for AJ. I found a horse whilst out on the road and decided it would be better than going on foot.”

“You taught yourself how to ride? That must have taken a while.”

“It wasn’t too difficult, came fairly naturally after a while. Was a lot of trial and error at first, though.”

“Trial and error like-“

“Like falling off a few times? Yes.”

“Makes sense. I’m pretty sure a southern girl that doesn’t know how to ride a horse is like a crime or something.”

Clementine rolls her eyes at his comment, glancing behind him to where Ruby is in the distance, having walked quite far away since they had stopped.

“Come on, we need to catch up” Clementine comments, the carefree expression on her face dropping when she realises the pain will have to commence once again.

“Hold on” Louis stops her, an idea forming in his mind. He turns away from her inquisitive look, dropping into a crouch that only confuses Clementine further.

“Um, what are you doing?” She questions in amusement.

“What does it look like I’m doing?”

“I really don’t know”

“I’m giving you a piggy back ride! Hop on, I’ll be your noble steed for this evening”

“You’re joking, right?” Clementine asks in clarification.

“Like I said Queen Clem, I am your faithful servant, ready to serve thee at a moments notice.”

“Don’t you think its going to look just a bit ridiculous if my first introduction to this group is me on your back?”

“Don’t worry, I'll let you back down before we get there.”

“Wont I be too heavy for you?” Clementine argues.

“Clem, you’re tiny-“

“Am not!”

“ _And_ you’re missing a leg. I’m gonna go ahead and say you’re about as light as a feather.”

“And   _you're_ as thin as a twig, I’m slightly worried you’ll snap”

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that and wait for you to hop on.”

Clementine stares at him incredulously for a few more seconds before caving in, clambering onto his back and passing her crutches for him to carry, her face burning in embarrassment. Louis stands back up smoothly, as if she wasn’t sitting on his back at all. She looks down at him in confusion when he doesn’t begin walking, tapping his shoulder to get his attention.

“Is there a reason we aren’t walking?” She asks

“You’ve gotta say ‘ya’ to get me moving.”

“Louis, I am not doing that.”

“Then I guess we’re not walking”

“Then let me down!”

“No can do, Clem.”

“Louis…”

He looks over his shoulder to her with a teasing grin, the grin only growing wider when she glares back at him.

“Well?” He teases her further, waiting for her response.

“Ya…” She mutters in embarrassment, finally giving in.

Louis was unpredictable, so she usually prepares herself for anything he might do. Still, she wasn’t exactly expecting him to take off running, no, _sprinting_ in the direction of Ruby. Her arms instinctively wrap around his chest to steady herself, unable to stop the laugh that bubbles out of her as he runs.

“Louis!” She protests, though this only makes Louis laugh in delight. He does eventually slow down when they reach Ruby, the red head having watched their approach in slight bewilderment.

“Hey Ruby, what’s up?” Louis asks as if nothing had happened, Clementine burrowing her head into the back of his neck to hide the burning flush on her face.

“I’m not sure I’ll ever get you, Louis.” Ruby comments, turning away from the two of them.  
“And quite frankly, I’m not sure if I want to.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Louis kept to his promise, letting them know they were nearby once he begun to recognise the area he and AJ had been walking in before they came across Nathan’s camp the day before. He crouches down slowly as not to jostle Clementine, waiting for her to slide off his back before passing her crutches back over to her.

“We close?” Ruby asks, glancing down at the map.

“Yeah, few more minutes I’d say, over in this direction” Louis responds, pointing to the path he had walked the day before.

“Okay, this is it. You ready?” Clementine inquires, waiting for Louis’ and Ruby’s affirmative nods before beginning her walk in the direction Louis pointed out, taking the lead.

Despite having already met them, Louis can’t help the way his muscles tense up from his nerves the closer they step towards the camp. Clementine’s cautious words from the day before echo around in his head, wondering if she was right to be so paranoid. After all, she had come across more people than he had, so she had more knowledge on how strangers were. It would be just their luck to escape death from one group, only to willingly to walk into it once more with another one.

“HALT!”

All three of them freeze at the commanding voice, looking around wildly in the direction of the yell. A young man seems to appear from nowhere from the bushes that surround the forest, rifle trained on the three of them as he approaches. Once the initial shock and fear passes, Louis is able to recognise him as one of the group members that Nathan had ordered to perform a perimeter sweep the day before, so it’s no surprise that he would be out here doing the same again.

The man seems to recognise him the same time he does, eyes squinting in suspicion as he takes in Clementine and Ruby standing next to him. His eyes land back on Louis, lowering the rifle ever so slightly, though still keeping it aimed in their general direction.

“Louis?” the man asks for clarification.

“Yeah. Uh… Jack, right?” Louis takes a swing in the dark, remembering the two names Nathan had said but unable to attach them to the face.

“Nearly, I’m Alex.” Alex responds, still glancing suspiciously at Clementine and Ruby.

“So… we gonna meet with your boss?” Louis asks with a half laugh, the laughter quickly dying off when Alex doesn’t show a hint of amusement at the question.

“I need you to hand over any weapons you may be carrying” Alex orders, glancing at the bow strapped to Clementine’s back.

“Not gonna happen” Clementine refuses, stiffening slightly at the command.

“It’s protocol. No strangers allowed in camp with weapons. It’s for everyone’s safety.”

The two of them remain in a tense stand off for a few moments, neither of them wanting to give in to the other. Clementine is the one to give in, nodding stiffly and reaching for the bow on her back. Alex’s grip on the rifle tightens slightly, a reflex to the sight of someone grabbing for a weapon. Clementine notices this, keeping the bow low to her side as not to alarm Alex, handing Marlon’s bow over to Louis for him to hand in. He waits for her to also withdraw her signature knife, passing the deadly weapon over to him whilst keeping her gaze trained on Alex. Louis steps forward cautiously with the two weapons in one hand, his other hand raised in the air to show he had no other weapons and no intention of attacking. Alex drops one hand from the rifle, taking the two weapons from him and storing them away.

Once any weapons are safely out of sight, Alex shifts into a more relaxed posture, lowering the gun away from the group. Louis hoped that being on the other end of a barrel was something he wouldn’t have to get used to…

“Follow me” Alex commands, turning away from them and marching off before any of them can get a word in.

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this…” Ruby mutters anxiously, following Clementine who marches off towards Alex without a hint of fear, despite no longer having access to her weapons.

They push past the thick thicket of the forest, coming into the clearing he had been in just yesterday. They had built another fire, flames crackling away though this time without a meal burning away on top of it. He recognises all three of them huddled around the fire, Nathan and Doctor Williams deep in conversation whilst Nora sits and listens. Nora is the one to spot them first, straightening in her sitting position and nodding her head in their direction when Nathan turns to see what had caused the change. Nathan glances over at them, face breaking into a bright grin once he realises who it is.

“Louis!” He shouts in delight, arms open in greeting as he stands from the fire, waiting for them to make their way over.

Nathans eyes slide over to Clementine once she appears from behind Louis, his happy smile slipping away to a look of slight shock at the sight of her missing leg. He’s quick to put the smile back on though, stepping forward to meet them.

“It really is good to meet all of you. I’m Nathan” Nathan introduces himself to the two, holding out a hand to shake.

“Clementine” Clementine says with a polite smile on her face, taking his hand for the offered handshake.

“Ruby” Ruby drawls, also taking Nathans hand for the handshake once he moves on from Clementine.

Nathan glances behind them, frowning in mild confusion when he doesn’t see what he’s looking for.

“You didn’t bring the boy? Um…AJ! Right?” Nathan asks curiously.

The mention of AJ immediately puts Clementine on high alert, glancing worriedly to Louis by her side.

“No, not today. He wasn’t feeling too well.” Clementine lies

“Oh dear! Well, I hope we aren’t taking any essential medication away from him. _If_ that’s what you’ve brought us, that is.” Nathan comments, pointing towards the backpack Ruby was carrying.

“Uh, no. I mean, yes it’s what we’ve brought but don’t worry, AJ will be fine. Just a small cold.”

“That’s good to hear. Speaking of cold, it’s a bit chilly out, isn’t it? Care to sit by the fire, keep warm while we have this little chat?” Nathan asks, waving a hand towards the fire in offering.

They take the offer, walking over to the logs that remained around the fire from the day before. Nora and Doctor Williams scooch over from their spot, making room for them to take a seat around the fire.

“So…where do we begin…” Nathan muses as he leans forward, scratching at the stubble on his chin absentmindedly as he studies the group.  
“I take it you’re the leader?” Nathan asks, nodding in Clementine’s direction.

“How could you tell?”

“Call it a sixth sense. After so many years doing what I do, what I did, you tend to get a read off people.”

“What you did?”

“Right, I didn’t give you my full name. Titles and all that crap that doesn’t matter anymore. Sergeant Nathan Burrows, 75th Ranger Infantry, 3rd Battalion.”

Clementine eyes widen in realisation, the odd parts she had been noticing starting to make sense. The availability of military weapons, the stiff nature of the group and the overall caution, as well as how they had managed to survive as long as they had.

“Now that we’ve got that out of the way, tell me.” Nathan begins, cocking his head to the side as he studies Clementine.  
“How exactly are you the leader? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you’re, uh, ‘incapable’ but… Isn’t this a job more suited for an adult?”

Clementine shifts uncomfortably at his question, to which Nathan immediately picks up on, proving his statement of getting a read off people.

“Shit…There _are_ no adults, are there? It’s just, what? You and a bunch of kids? Living out on your own?”

Clementine glances to the others, frustrated he had managed to figure out everything without her even having to say a word. Still, it didn’t mean they had any idea of where the school was. As long as that was kept a secret, she would feel calm and comfortable around this group.

“No. No adults.” Clementine admits, seeing no point of lying to him now.

“That’s…Jesus. I… can’t even begin to imagine how difficult it must be for you guys. I mean, shit, I was surprised you managed to keep AJ alive for so long, but, to look after a whole group of kids by yourself? That’s a hell of a job you got there.”

“It’s difficult. But, it works. Still, this isn’t why we’re here, is it?” Clementine asks darkly, wanting to get out of this man’s interrogative questions.

“Sorry, right.” Nathan apologises, holding up his hands in defence.  
“Trading. That’s what we’re here for. Let’s begin with what you've got, shall we?”

“How about you show us what you’ve got first” Clementine counters

Nathan chuckles in delight, standing from the fire and indicating for them to follow.

“Oh, I like you. Negotiation, the art of the trade, right?” Nathan says with another chuckle, pushing open the door to the caravan, holding its door open while waiting patiently for them to stand and follow.

They step into the shade of the caravan, the old metal creaking under their combined weight. Clementine’s eyes dart around the interior of the caravan, searching for escape routes and any weapons that they may have stashed away. The inside, while fairly spacious for a caravan, still produces a claustrophobic feeling with so many of them stuffed in at once. The windows were too small to serve as an escape route, meaning the door they had entered through would be their only way in and out, if they needed it for an escape route.

Clementine’s attention is immediately drawn to the rather neat collection of guns hanging proudly on a wooden display. There were different varieties of rifles, shotguns and pistols, all looking well looked after, as if barely used.

“I see you’ve noticed my collection?” Nathans voice comes from her right, the man in question stepping to her side to admire the collection with her.  
“These were my pride and joy, back before all this started.”

“Out of all the hobbies to have, I guess being a gun enthusiast is the one you want for when the dead come back to life.” Louis jokes, coaxing a light chuckle out of Nathan.

"That it is."

"Anything up for trade?" Clementine asks, eying up a few of the weapons.

"Off of here? No, I'm afraid not. As for other weapons... Well, let's just say not yet."

"Excuse me?"

"I mean no offense, but I still don't really know you, or your group. Arming you up with weapons that you could then use against us wouldn't exactly be the best move, now would it?"

"So what _do_ you have for trade?" Clementine asks, feeling slightly irritated.

"Here, come take a look. This is something we're actually quite proud of" Nathan tells them as he shuffles over to a large container stored under a table.

Nathan grabs a hold of the container, grunting with the effort of the weight as he stands back up, slamming the box down on the table and lifting the latch, pushing open the heavy lid to reveal its contents.

Louis shuffles closer, looking into the boxes contents with curiosity. He's not sure what he's looking at at first, a collection of plastic bags filled with something he can't identify, only coming to the realisation once he reads the different labels written in sharpie on the front of the bags.

"They're..."

"Seeds" Ruby finishes his sentence for him, stepping towards the box in delight as she scans over the different variety available.

"We've got a good garden growing back home, lots of fruit and veg, roots, all of that. It's taken years, but, we've finally gotten to a point where we can start harvesting some of the seeds instead of just replanting them." Nathan explains, stepping back from the box to let them all have a good look.

"Tomatoes, Peppers, Beans, Corn, Carrots, Potatoes" Ruby lists off the different vegetation she can see, the excitement in her voice increasing with every name.

Clementine also steps forward, getting a look of the seeds for herself. This was exactly what they needed. This could be their answer to their food crisis. If they cleaned up the greenhouse a bit better, perhaps have to sacrifice some of the herbs and wild flowers that were taking up potting space, they could have a steady supply of food available to go with whatever animals they could catch when hunting and fishing.

Still, was it enough? Medication was hard to come across these days and whilst it was clear that Nathan and his group were desperate for it, they could need it in the future as much as they do. Then again, there was always an opportunity to scavenge for more, whereas Nathan's group clearly needed it now. And trading now would definitely help improve their relationship with this new community, perhaps even set them up for future trading opportunities...

"Can I take a look at what you've got to offer now?" Nathan asks politely, glancing at the backpack Ruby was still carrying.

Clementine nods to Ruby in confirmation, the latter removing the bag from her back and placing it on the table, opening the zip to reveal its contents.

"Hold on a sec" Nathan stops them, turning his head to face the open door of the caravan.  
"Matt!" He yells out, a few seconds passing before the doctor appears at the doorway, Nathan beckoning him inside.

"This what we need?" Nathan asks, gesturing to the bag of medical supplies.

"May I?" Doctor Williams asks Ruby for permission, indicating his desire to look through its contents, enthusiastically burrowing his head in the bag when he gets permission.

"Hmm, let's see... Gauze and bandages, good we'll need plenty of that... Antibiotics and general pain killers; aspirin, paracetamol. Antiseptics, clean syringes, clean needles, sutures." Doctor Williams does as Ruby had done, listing off the supplies as he comes across them.

"Oh, and is this..." Doctor Williams trails off, holding up a small glass vial of clear liquid to the light, peering at its faded label.

"Morphine" Ruby confirms for him.  
"Some of its been used, but its all we got. Not exactly somethin' you come across much these days."

"No, no it is not." Doctor Williams agrees, taking his gaze off the bottle to look over at Ruby.  
"Are you their doctor?"

"Wouldn't call myself a 'doctor', exactly. More like a nurse." Ruby responds.

"Sounds stressful."

"Thats one word for it..."

"So!" Nathan interrupts, clapping his hands together to catch everyone's attention.  
"You've seen what we've got. We've seen what you've got. I can tell you're interested and well, you can probably tell _we're_ interested. Do we have a deal?"

Clementine glances over to Louis and Ruby, still looking unsure. Louis simply shrugs his shoulders in response, not knowing whether to take the deal.

"Mind if I talk to my people for a bit? Alone?" Clementine asks

"Of course, I need to speak to Nora myself" Nathan responds, already making his way out of the caravan. Doctor Williams gives them a polite nod before walking off to join Nathan.

"What do you think, Ruby?"

"Well, we still have some of our medical supplies back home. It's not exactly like we'll be giving up _all_ of our supplies. Plus, we could really use those seeds..."

"Louis? What about you?"

"You want my opinion on this?"

"Why else do you think I brought you with me? You're part of this group too, your opinion is just as important as mine."

"Oh. Well uh-- I..." Louis stutters to a stop, thinking over the situation.  
"Ruby says we still have supplies at home, right? And it's not like we have anyone that's gravely injured right now. They, on the other hand, do. Doctor Williams said it himself; he doesn't think their people back home will make it without those supplies.  
If we can do something to help that, and also get something in return? I say we go for it."

Clementine nods at his words, agreeing with the statement.

"We can draw up a plan once we get home on how to clean up the greenhouse a bit, maybe even plan for another scouting trip, see if there's anywhere around we can scavange for more supplies?"

"Sounds like a plan, boss" Louis jokes, receiving the eyeroll from Clementine he is used to getting from others.

Theres a knock on the caravan door, all three turning just in time to see Nathan swing open the door, startling slightly when he notices all three stares on him.

"Have you come to a decision?" Nathan inquires, standing in the entrance to the caravan.

"Yes. Yes we have" Clementine declares for them, a small half smile on her face.  
"We'll take the deal."

Nathan beams at all three of them, hearing the words he had been hoping to hear the whole afternoon.

"Thats fantastic. Honestly, I can't even begin to describe how much this means to me, to all of us" Nathan tells them, waving an arm to indicate at the group behind him.  
"Thank you. All of you."

"No need to thank us, man. It's the least we can do. You need it more than us." Louis brushes off Nathan's gratitude, taken aback by just how much thanks they were getting.

"Still, thank you. You might just have saved countless lives." Nathan continues his thanks, looking over to where Ruby stood.  
"Uh... Ruby, isn't it?"

"It is." Ruby confirms.

"Would you mind sorting out what you want to take from the seeds whilst I have a chat with Louis and Clementine here? If they don't mind, of course."

"Sure, no problem" Ruby agrees, already making her way over to the box on the table, unpacking their medical supplies from the back pack next to it to make room for their new supplies.

"Let's take this outside, shall we? Nora and Matt would like to be involved in this." Nathan's says, turning away from the two to make his way down the steps of the caravan.

"You sure you're okay?" Clementine asks Ruby, glancing between her and Louis who was already exiting the caravan.

"I'll be fine, sug. You go have that chat."

Clementine follows Ruby's instructions, getting to the door to the caravan to find Louis waiting for her, holding out a hand to help her down the steps. She takes his help gratefully, not trusting the stability of the metal steps on her descent.

The two make their way over side by side to the others sat around the fire, taking a seat on one of the logs available to them. Louis shuffled unconsciously closer to Clementine once they had sat down, the groups inquisitive stares making him feel nervous.

"So, what exactly did you want to talk about?" Clementine is the first to break the silence, also feeling unsettled under their gazes.

"I'm not sure how much Louis told you of what I said yesterday, of what I asked for. Did he happen to mention one of our people back home being pregnant?"

"He did. He also said you wanted to speak to AJ's parents?"

"I know it's a bit of a weird ask, and I completly understand you not wanting to bring them-"

"We did. You're looking at her."

Nathan's mouth snaps shut, Nora and Doctor Williams looking to Clementine in a mixture of shock and confusion.

"Y-You--You're his... Mother?" Nathan's begins in horror, leaning back.  
"But, you're... What, Sixteen? Seventeen? How..."

"I'm not his mom, I just look after him."

"What happened? To his parents I mean?"

Louis can feel Clementine stiffen at Nathan's question, placing a comforting hand on her leg as he leans closer to whisper.

"You don't have to tell them anything, if you don't want to."

"They died" Clementine states simply, not wanting to expand on the subject.  
"I'm the one that's been looking after AJ since the day he was born."

" _Just_ you? No one else?" Nora asks in disbelief. 

"Mostly, yes. There was... There was a about a year where AJ was... He was taken from me. He was only three at the time."

"Wait, then how did you get him back?" Nora asks.

Louis knew they were walking on thin ice here. Whilst Clementine had told him about the time AJ had been taken, and had gotten bits and pieces from AJ (mostly AJ talking about someone called 'the ranch'), Clementine hadn't even told _him_ about how she had rescued AJ. He was doubtful she would be happy to reveal it now.

"I just did"

The group falls quiet at Clementines curt answer, Nathan's people glancing at one another worriedly.

"Knock it off you guys, she doesn't wanna talk about it." Nathan reprimands then, looking to Clementine apologetically.

"We apologize for the questions. They must seem intrusive, but... How on earth did you keep not only him alive, but yourself? AJ told us he's about six, so... You must have been incredibly young yourself when you started to take care of him?" Doctor Williams adds onto Nathan's apology.

"You're right, I was young. I was around twelve when AJ was born." Clementine confirms.

"Jesus..." Nathan mutters quietly from his spot.

"A twelve year old looking after a baby all by herself? In a world where danger is around every corner? How did you manage it?" Nora asks

"Look, I know that you guys are looking for advice on how to raise a kid. I get that. You wanna know the truth? The truth is, I had no idea what I was doing. Honestly, I _still_  have no clue what I'm doing. This is the first time I'm raising AJ whille  _in_ a group. The whole time I looked for AJ, the only life he knew was one on the road, constantly moving, never settling. So if you're looking for advice on how to raise a kid in a community, I'm sorry, but I'm not that person, and I'm not his mom."

Nathan looks slightly crestfallen to hear this, sighing in exasperation with his face set in disappointment.

"Thats not exactly true." Louis interjects, every person sat by the fire raising their heads to look at him.

"What?"

"Come on, Clem. You're kinda selling yourself a bit short here, don't you think?"

"What are you talking about?"

"The second I met you, you were already adjusting to the group, adjusting AJ to the group. Yes, you _had_  spent his whole life teaching him how to survive in this world.  
Then, it all changed. Here you were in a new group, and suddenly you had to survive in a way you weren't used to, that AJ wasn't used to.  
And I could see that in AJ. The night he..." Louis stops himself, realising it would be best not to talk about a child murdering his best friend in front of a group of people he had just met.  
"That night, I could see all the ways you had taught him to survive in this world. Teaching him the ways he needs to be brutal and ruthless. At first, it was all I could see. I thought you had raised a monster. But he _isn't._  Somehow, in this whole mess of teaching him how to survive, you managed to find ways to teach him to _l_ _ive_. To have tickle fights, to give in to his own imagination, to find enjoyment in drawing and playing with others. You taught him how to be a kid, how to be a _human_ , in a world that usually doesn't have time for that. You say you didn't raise him in that way, but you _did_. And AJ is living proof of that."

Clementines mouth is parted slightly in surprise, taking in Louis' sincere expression as he desperately tries to get his point across. A light chuckle from Nathan takes her attention away from him, turning her head to face Nathan with brows furrowed in confusion as to what had made him laugh.

"I'm sorry, its just... You say AJ's parents are gone and yet here they are, sitting right in front of me." Nathan says with a grin.  
"Sure, you might not be related by blood, but that doesn't matter. Family is what you make it."

"Sir!"

The shout interrupts the moment, all of then turning to see Alex and Jack approaching from the forest, faces as serious as ever.

"Sorry to interrupt, sir. You wanted us to come get you when it was time to leave." Alex continues.

Nathan looks up to the sky, noting the sun's position with a saddened sigh, turning back to Clementine and Louis once again with an apologetic look.

"It would seem you're right, boys. We need to start moving if we want to get home before sunset." Nathan agrees, standing reluctantly from his seat.

Louis follows his lead, standing swiftly and offering his hand once more for Clementine to use as support as she struggles to stand from her seat. Nathan watches them curiously, looking to Doctor Williams who is giving him his own knowing look.

"Your call, boss." Doctor Williams says, with a shrug of one shoulder, able to tell what Nathan was thinking.

"Could you hold on one sec, before you leave?" Nathan asks, not giving them time to respond, already rushing towards the caravan with purpose.

Ruby is the first to exit, looking very cheerful with her bag of seeds as she makes her way down the steps. Louis turns his attention back to the ground around him, searching for Clementines crutches that he knew he put down somewhere nearby.

Clementines sharp intake of air worries him, quickly glancing up to see if something had hurt her. She doesn't appear to be in pain, but is instead staring at the entrance to the caravan. Louis follows her gaze, letting out his own gasp at what he sees.

Nathan is exiting the caravan with a knowing smile on his face, carrying a slightly worn looking leg prosthetic in his arms. No one says a word as he makes his way over to them, holding out the prosthetic for them to take.

"There was a girl in our group, lost both her legs in a car accident, way before this whole apocalypse started. We, uh... We lost her a few years ago, but we kept her prosthetics, just in case. Well, here's the case" Nathan jokes, pushing the prosthetic towards Clementine.

"Think of it as a sign of good faith. A thank you for agreeing to trade, and hopefully as a sign of many more trades to come?" Nathan offers, waiting for Clementine to take the leg.

"Are you sure? What if someone in your group needs it?" Clementine asks, eying the prosthetic uncertainly.

"I suppose that could be true, but besides, I'd like you to take it." Nathan argues back.

"You need it more than us." Nathan parrots Louis' words from earlier, smiling contently when Clementine gives in and takes the prosthetic from him.  
"Go ahead, try it on"

Clementine keeps one hand gripped onto Louis' arm as he helps her lower herself back down to the log.

"How do I..."

"Here" Doctor Williams offers, grabbing a separate part of the prosthetic.  
"This here is a silicon liner. It's what your prosthetic will attach to. Just roll it onto your limb, make sure its on properly."

Clementine follows the doctors instructions, pulling the sleeve onto her stump, gazing curiously at the pin that stuck out from the bottom.

"Now all you have to do is line up the prosthesis with the pin, push it in so it locks into place and then fold the liner back over the top of the prosthetic." Doctor Williams continues his instructions, waiting patiently for Clementine to follow them.

"How does it feel?" Louis asks in awe, unable to take his eyes off the new limb.

"I don't know. Its weird, like my brain can't figure out if my leg is there or not. It's kind of sore as well."

"Thats normal" Doctor Willams and Ruby chime in at the same time, the doctor looking amused when Ruby appears to get embarrassed.

"Sorry, you go." Ruby mutters, staring down at her feet.

"There's a new pressure on your limb, so it's going to be sore for a while."

"Im sure you'll adapt to it." Nathan adds to the doctors words.

"Precisely, you just need to give your body time to take in the new changes. After a while, you'll barely notice its there. However, I would recommend you continue using the crutches for a while. It will take some time to learn how to walk with your new prosthetic, especially since it won't be a perfect fit."

Clementine shakily gets to her feet, leaning on Louis for support, still putting all her weight on her real leg. Louis gives her an encouraging nod, watching anxiously as she hesitantly begins to lean half of her weight on the new prosthetic. Other than some slight shakiness, she remains standing, feeling confident enough to let go of Louis to stand on her own.

"I don't know how to thank you" Clementine tells Nathan sincerely, unable to take her eyes off the new appendage.

"Well, there is one way. I really think that continuing to trade would be good for the both of our groups. So this is what I'll propose; We'll come back here every three months while we're out on scavenging trips. If you feel up to trading, come back down here and we'll be more than happy to see what you've got to offer. Sound good?"

"Sounds better than good. I guess we'll see you then?" Clementine agrees to his offering. 

"We'll see you then" Nathan confirms with a smile, turning to face Alex who was stood nearby.

"You still have their weapons?"

"Yes, sir"

"Give them back, then get ready to move out"

"Yes, sir"

Alex steps forward, swinging Marlons bow from his back and stiffly handing it over to Louis. Louis takes it gladly from him, waiting for him to withdraw Clementines knife from his pocket before handing that over as well. Louis hands the weapons over to Clementine, who inspects the knife closely for any signs of damage before storing it away in her back pocket.

Alex gives them a stiff nod which they can only guess is some form of goodbye before heading back over to Jack, the two of them following Nathan, Nora and Doctor Williams into the caravan, slamming the door behind them once they had entered.

The three of them watch as the caravan roars to life, slowly pulling out of the clearing and driving down to the main road. Louis is the first to snap out of the trance, spotting Clementines crutches propped up on a nearby log they had been using for seats.

"Ready to go home?" Louis asks as he passes the crutches back over to Clementine, who takes them with a thankful smile.

"Yeah, let's go home."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The walk home was, thankfully, uneventful. They would stop a few times for Clementine to either take the prosthetic on or off, wanting to get used to the new limb but also wanting to give her sore stump a rest every now and then, switching between the pain of her leg and the pain of her arms from the crutches.

Louis would hover nearby whenever she walked on the prosthetic, practically leaping towards her everytime she so much as shook when she took a step with it. He could tell his fidgety and worried actions were getting on her nerves, but he couldn't help himself from feeling anxious over it. Still, he would watch her with a sense of pride as she walked, the movements, whilst shaky, proving just how much of a bad ass she was to be able to adjust so quickly.

Its a great relief to all of them when the forest that surrounds them starts to look a bit more familiar, the school gates slowly creeping into view. The sun was just beginning to set, already sunken behind the looming belltower of the school and making the sky look slightly darker than it was.

There are two small figures perched up top the watch tower, most likely on watch duty. Once they got closer, they were able to make out the two figure as AJ and Willy, so preoccupied in their chat that they hadn't noticed their return.

"You know, the whole point of being on watch is to 'watch'!" Louis shouts up at the two of them, forcing down a laugh when they startle at his voice.

"You're back!" AJ yells in delight, rushing towards the ladder to make his way down.

"Aasim! Omar! Violet! They're back!" Willy announces, making them wince at how loud he was yelling.

AJ pulls the gate open, struggling slightly with its weight and rusted hinges that squeal in protest. He waits patiently for them to enter (well, as patiently as an over-energetic six year old can), bounding over to them the second the gates slam closed behind them.

"I'm so glad you're back! Willy came with me on patrol, and while we were outside we saw this huge rabbit! Willy shot at it with his bow and it went right through its head! It was awesome! Oh! And-" AJ stops in his excited recall of the day, only just then realising what was different.  
"You have a new foot! Did you find the foot book?" AJ asks in childlike innocence.

"No, goofball" Clementine tells him with a soft laugh.  
"This was a gift from the new group. What do you think?"

"It's awesome! It looks kinda weird but... It's cool! Does that mean you can come out on patrol with me again?" AJ asks hopefully, missing Clementine by his side whenever they went out.

"We'll see" Clementine responds, not wanting to get his hopes up just yet.

She had been able to walk on it for a while, but still needed to take breaks every now and then when the pain got to be too much. All she could do was hope Doctor Williams was right about her getting used to it, both the prosthetic and the uncomfortableness that came with it.

"Don't listen to her, AJ" Louis interjects with a teasing grin, playfully jabbing his elbow into her side.  
"She's pretending like she hasn't just spent the last few hours walking perfectly fine with it. She'll join you on patrols again, I can guarantee it. _She_ just doesn't believe it yet. I'm sure you know what that means!"

"What?" AJ asks him eagerly.

"Yeah, what?" Clementine also asks, though with a suspicious squint and not sounding quite as eager.

"It means it's up to Team Fun to make her believe!"

"Yeah!" AJ agrees with him passionately, having no idea how they were going to do that but willing to follow Louis' lead none the less.

"Oh, really?" Clementine says with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yep. First order of business though is some well earned rest."

"And how exactly do you plan on making that a part of 'Team Funs' plan?"

"Like this!"

It all happens in a blur, one second she is looking at Louis' mischsvious grin and the next she is staring at his back, Louis having ducked down and grabbed ahold of her, lifting her effortlessly into a fireman's lift and marching towards the dorms of the school.

"Louis! Put me down, I can walk!"

"You hear that, AJ? We've convinced her she can walk already! That was easier than I thought."

She wants to be annoyed with him. She really, _really_ does. But it's hard to be when her face is burning with the effort of stopping the grin that was fighting to appear, listening to the sounds of AJs ecstatic giggles as he runs beside them, struggling to keep up with Louis' long strides.

"Is that... Is that Louis carrying Clementine on his shoulder?" Violet asks in mild disbelief, AJs giggles quietly disappearing as the three of them make their way into the dorms.

"Sure is." Omar confirms for her, unable to take his eyes off the stew he was currently stirring.

"Suppose I shouldn't be suprised, should I?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell there's a band/photographer AU I've been thinking of?


	3. Chapter 3

There were a few differences in their sleeping habits. He knew from Aasims constant complaining that he was a sleep fidgeter. It didn't matter if he was dreaming, having a nightmare or in a dreamless deep sleep, he would always toss and turn. Quite frankly, he's suprised Clementine hasn't refused to sleep in the same bed as him so far. She never complains, though.

Then again, that's part of what makes them so different. She doesn't complain. In fact, she doesn't even _move_. Whatever position she had fell asleep in, that's generally the same one he'll find her in the next morning. If she does move, it's very little (or it's because his constant fidgeting forced her to move). You'd think that would be a blessing. But honestly, it's not.

Because he has no way of knowing the nightmares that plague her. He _knows_  she has them, he just can't tell _when_ she's having them, and he _hates_ that. Hates that he can't be there for her, to help her deal with her grief, to find some way to comfort her when the horrors of her past force her awake, cold sweat clinging to her skin, body trembling with unneeded adrenalin. Clementine refuses to wake him though, unable to find it within herself to bother him with her own issues.

The only way he realises is the next morning. He will wake leisurely, reaching out an arm only to find the space next to him empty and cold, long since abondened. It's on those mornings he knows the nightmares had been too much, and she had gone to find her own way of dealing with it.

It makes him feel all the more worse when it's _him_  that wakes her up from his own nightmares. He doesn't mean to of course, but his body always finds a way to betray him; tossing and turning becoming more violent, limbs rapidly twitching and breathing laboured, waking up from his nightmares with a sharp gasp he is unable to control. It always seem to be on the nights she is able to escape her nightmares that he awakens her with his own, robbing her of her precious nights of uninterrupted sleep. And yet, she will be there, rubbing a comforting hand up his back and whispering reasurring words into his ear, bringing him down from the brink of terror.

It would seem that this morning was another of those mornings. He had awoken not to the sight of Clementine laid next to him but instead of the empty space of their bed, AJ still peacefully slumbering on the bed opposite. AJ had always been an early riser, so the fact he was still here and asleep must mean it was really early. A quick glimpse to the window behind him confirms his thought; no sign of the rising sun, instead only met with the pitch black darkness of the schools ground.

Louis forces himself out of the bed with a sleepy yawn, bringing a tired hand up to his face to wipe the sleep from his eyes; vision still blurry from the transition of deep sleep to being awake.  
He ponders over where he would find Clementine this time as he shrugs on his trenchcoat, closing the door behind him as softly as possible as to not disturb AJ.

He had begun to pick up a pattern of where she would wander off to based on what nightmare she had. _If_  she felt up to talking about it, that is.

In the times where she dreamed about those she had lost, those that had died for her or because of her, he would often find her standing in their makeshift graveyard, staring blankly down at the collection of crosses that had accumulated over the years. He had lost count of the amount of times he had assured her Marlons death wasn't on her, but he could still see the guilt shining in her eyes whenever her gaze landed on his cross.

In the times where she dreams about him, whether it be losing him or, the ones he felt worst about, the dreams where he would blame her for everything, he would find her in the music room. There were a lot of things he wished for, but one of the biggest was that he could go back in time and never say the things he had said to her, harsh words coming from a broken man that only served as fuel for her nightmares.

The first time he had found her down in the music room in the middle of the night, it had scared the shit out of him. Before their sleeping arrangement, it had been a night where he had given up on the idea of sleep and made his way down to the music room as he usually does. The room was covered by darkness, so he hadn't realised someone was sat at the piano until he was right up close. On the brightside, his very girly shriek of terror had helped cheer her up a bit.

She isn't in either of those places though. Instead he finds her up in Marlons office, gently pushing open the heavy doors to find her at the desk, prosthetic leant up against side of the desk. He notes the dark bags under her eyes as she sluggishly scribbles away at a piece of paper. She would look like a professional businesswoman working late hours at the office if it wasn't for the fact that she was writing with a bright red crayon.

Clementine glances up at the creaking sound of the door opening, the half smile on her face in greeting seeming to be the only amount of effort she can spare.

"What are you doing up? It's still early?" She asks absentmindedly, returning to to her task.

"I could ask you the same question" He shoots back, pulling out a spare chair from the side of the room, wincing at the way it scraped wooden floor before taking a seat.

"You know why."

"They've been worse recently, haven't they? It feels like every morning I wake up now and find the bed empty."

Clementines stops in her writing, leaning back in her chair with a tired sigh as she drops the red crayon to the desk.

"It's fine, I've dealt with them for years and I'll deal with them for many more years to come."

"But what I'm trying to say is you don't have to. Im always here for you, you know that. I don't care what time it is, if you have a nightmare you can't deal with, _please_ wake me up. Let me help you."

Clementine shakes her head, refusing his help as she usually does when it comes to this argument.

"You know I can't do that."

"Why not? You're always there for me, for whenever the nightmares get too much."

"That's... It's not the same. Besides, you shouldn't have to worry about me." Clementine replies sharply, picking the crayon back up and resuming her work.

"But I'm worrying about you anyway! Every time you step out those gates, Im wracked by fear that you'll be too tired to notice things, that maybe a walker will get the jump on you. I promise you, I'd much rather you wake me up then have to spend my days worrying you'll drop any second."

Clementine doesn't reply to his offer, the only sound in the office being the scratching of crayon against paper. Her silence isn't a yes, but it's also not a no. She's thinking about it, and thats all he can ask for right now.

"Do you at least want to talk about it? You don't have to if you don't want to."

Clementine closes her eyes for a moment, the flickering light of the lone candle on the desk accentuating the shadows under her eyes. He's expecting a 'no' when she instead reaches down beside her, pulling open a desk drawer and rumagging through its contents. She pulls out a folded piece of paper, throwing it onto the desk and closing the drawer.

Louis takes the paper from the desk, unfolding it to reveal the makeshift calander they had been working on. Ever since the deal with Nathan, they had begun keeping track of the days to make sure they would meet back in precisely three months, not wanting to accidentally miss the meet up time because they hadn't counted the days right. He looks to the piece of paper in perplexity, unsure as to how a calender could be the subject of her nightmares.

"They always get worse this time of year. As soon as the temperature begins to drop and the leaves start to fall from the trees, they steadily get worse and worse. Wasn't till we started making that calender that I noticed what time of year it was."

"Whats wrong with this tine of year? Halloween too spooky for you?" He jokes in an attempt to lighten the situation.

"It was around this time of the year that I lost Lee"

Oh...

"I'm sorry" He apologises, not knowing what else to say.

"It's fine, not your fault. You couldn't have known."

Louis groans internally, cringing at his previous attempt at a joke. He knew this was a serious topic, and yet he couldn't stop himself from making the damn joke.

"Its weird. No matter how awful the dreams are; whether I have to watch myself shoot him again, see him be torn apart by walkers or listen to him blame me for his death, I can't help but wake up feeling glad I could see him again."

"Do you ever have nice dreams about him?"

Her lips curl into a small, barely there smile as she reminisces about previous dreams with her guardian figure.

"Yeah, sometimes. Usually when there's something on my mind when I feel unsure, I'll dream of him and we'll just... Talk. Nothing else, just catching up on what's happened in my life."

"That sounds nice"

"They are." She responds, smile slipping from her face and long suffering pain returning to her eyes.  
"They're far and few in between."

Louis winces at the sorrow in her voice, watching her sink back into her work, sympathising with her pain.

"What are you working on?" He asks, feeling the need to change the subject.

"Oh, I had been thinking over the past few days" Clementine begins, grateful for the change.  
"Thought it would be best to get work started on the greenhouse as soon as possible. I'm just writing up a rough plan on what we're going to need to do"

"Care to share?"

She chuckles at his rhyme, putting the crayon down and turning the piece of paper to face him, pushing it into his waiting hands.

He gives the piece of paper a quick look over, scanning through the writing to get a quick understanding of her plan. The first step was clearing out the walkers that had been left from their last visit, dragging them out back somewhere away to burn the corpses.  
The part that grabbed his attention was the mention of the fertiliser in the fishing shack.

"What's this about the fertiliser?"

"AJ said he found some extra fertiliser in the fishing shack last time he was out there. He was going to tell Willy about it to make more bombs, but I thought it would be better to use it in the greenhouse."

"You mean for its actual _intended_ purpose?"

"Weird, isn't it? That I've raised a kid who sees plant fertiliser and his first thought is to use it for bombs" Clementine jokes, though it seems to make her more sad than happy.

"Thats not due to the way you raised him. That's just because... Because that's the kind of world he lives in now."

"Yeah... Maybe..."

Clementine shakes her head lightly, pulling herself out of her own thoughts.

"Anyway, I was actually going to ask you to go grab it later today. Youre supposed to go out fishing today anyway, right?"

Louis racks his brain, trying to remember their schedule. Clementine was right, he was indeed scheduled for fishing today with Omar. It was actually something he wanted to bring up with Clem.

"Sure, I can do that. I wanted to ask you something though, about going out fishing."

Clementine squints her eyes at him in suspicion, likely trying to figure out if he was trying to find someway out of his responsibilities. Guess old habits really do die hard...

"I was wondering if maybe... Maybe we can get Violet to come out fishing?"

Clementine raises an eyebrow in surprise, not expecting that particular ask.

"Do you really think that's the best of ideas? With her eyes and all..."

"Thats exactly why I think she should come out with us. Youve seen her the past few days, right?"

Clementine opens her mouth to answer, but stops when she realises that she hadn't actually physically _seen_ Violet for a while.

"Actually, I haven't..."

" _Exactly_. She's been holed up in her room for days now, only ever coming out to eat. I think this whole 'I'm useless without my vision' bullshit that she thinks is true is really starting to get to her."

"I know it is. And I hate seeing her like this as much as you do. But sending her out? It's risky..."

"It's not like Violets completly lost her vision, she's able to make certain stuff out _and_  shes proven her reflexes are still good. I'll be with her, I'll make sure nothing happens to her. I promise."

"Alright. Alright, fine." Clementine caves in to his request, hastily writing down some changes to her plans and schedules.  
"Take Rosie with you. I'll feel much better if she's out there guarding you both."

The mention of Rosies name sparks an idea in his mind, unable to hide the excitement on his face as he thinks it over.

"What is it?" Clementine asks, seeing the gears turning in his head.

"I don't know why we haven't thought of it till now... Why don't we train Rosie to be a guide dog for Violet?"

"A guide dog? Don't they have to train them from when they're really young? It takes years and years of training, Louis"

"Well, yeah, but I'm not saying we train her to be a full guide dog. Rosies already good at alerting us about walkers or other dangers, as well as being able to take them out herself. We just need to train her a bit more to stay by Violets side, make sure she doesn't go off attacking walkers in the distance and instead only fends off the walkers that get too close. "

"I suppose its possible. It is going to take a _lot_ of time to train her though. Time we don't really have."

"I'm not saying we have to do it right now. Just a thought, you know?"

"It's a good idea, Lou. We'll make it happen. It's worth it for Violet."

"Yeah...Hell yeah it is." Louis agrees enthusiastically.

A sudden bright light catches his eye, well, more like shines directly into his eyes, from the broken window leading to the balcony. He lifts a hand to shield his eyes from its intensity, realising it was only the rising sun, signalling the start to the new day. It wouldn't be long before the others would find their way outside, ready and waiting for their daily chores.

"Suppose I should go get ready for some fishing, and let Violet know of the change of plans." Louis notes, pushing himself up from the chair he had gotten comfortable in.  
"Promise me you'll try and get some rest today?" He asks Clementine worriedly, half turned towards the door.

"I've still got some stuff to work out and need to finish this-"

"Clem" He draws out her name warningly, in an almost scolding manner.

"Jeez, alright. I promise I'll try."

"Thanks darling" Louis tells her with his usual warm smile, turning to pull open the double doors to leave.

"Wait, why are you the one giving me orders? I thought I was supposed to be the leader here" Clementine calls after him just as he gets one foot out the door

"Oh, you are. Not gonna stop me from bossing you around every now and then." He tells her with a cheeky grin, throwing in a wink for extra measure before exiting the room, closing the doors behind him as he goes.

Clementine stares at the closed doors he had just left from for a few seconds before shaking her head fondly, picking the crayon back up to resume her work.

"That boy's gonna kill me..."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Louis was standing just outside of Violets room, hand raised to knock when he began to ponder the best way of entering the room. He was sure Violet would prefer the polite way; a gentle knock to the door to announce his presence before he enters the room.

But that just wasn't him, now was it?

Instead, he reels back and kicks the door open with as much force as he can. The resulting sound is explosive; wood creaking from the force when the solid door rebounds off the wall opposite, entering the room in a dramatic fashion.

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead!" He declares, stepping into the room with his arms outstretched.

He had to give Violet credit, as she doesn't even move from her position; still curled up under the covers of her bed. He would be concerned she was dead under there if it wasn't for the fact he knew she was just used to this sort of thing from him.

Violet shifts slightly under the covers, peeking through the blanket to glare menacingly at him from her one good eye.

"Fuck off" She growls in greeting, pulling the covers back over her head.

"Aw, come on, Vi! That's no way to say morning to your best friend!"

"You're not my best friend"

Ouch. She sure could be grumpy in the mornings...

"Well then, seems we're in a bit of a predictment, seeing as _you_  are _my_  best friend. And since you're my best friend, I'm not just going to let you rot away in here."

Violet doesn't respond, instead choosing to remain silent under the covers. Louis takes this as initiative to keep speaking, knowing it would take some time to coax her out of bed.

"Fresh orders from the boss upstairs. Got a change of plans, you're coming out fishing today."

This at least seems to pique her interest, covers shifting slightly as Violet moves underneath them, bringing up a hand to pull the covers away while she pulls herself up into a sitting position.

"Fishing? Me?" Violet asks in disbelief as Louis takes a seat at the end of her bed, not seeing the reason why Clementine would send her on a fishing trip.

"Yep"

"With who?"

Louis' happy grin is all the answer she needs, flopping back down on the bed with an exasperated sigh. Louis can't help but pout slightly at her unenthusiastic reaction.

"Rosie will be coming too" He adds on, hoping to tempt her with their trusted companion.

"Why me though?"

"Huh?"

"I'm just suprised Clementine is letting me do something around here."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Louis, I'm not blind-" Violet cuts herself off, closing her eyes with an annoyed sigh at her own choice of words.  
"What I mean to say is that I can tell how worried you guys have been, how reluctant you are to let me do anything. Why has that suddenly changed?"

He doesn't want to lie to Violet, but everything she just said is completly correct. Especially considering it just took a lot of convincing for Clementine to come round to the idea. He can't tell her that however, as it might just send her down into a deeper spiral.

"Nothings _changed_ , Vi. At least, not in the way you're thinking. Like we've said a hundred times before, we're just waiting for your eyes to get better. Ruby said your eyes are past the point we have to worry about infection, and don't even try to lie to me about your vision not improving, coz we know it has, you've proved it before. Clem thinks you're ready to get back out there, and so do I." Louis reassures her earnestly, standing from the bed.

"Question is, do you?" He challenges

The look of determination of Violets face is all the answer he needs, smiling proudly when she pulls herself out of bed.

"I'll let you get ready and wait by the gates."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Look, at the end of the day, it's not entirely _my_ fault Aasim dropped his bowl of morning stew! He wasn't paying attention as much as I was, plus, who the hell thinks it's a good idea to eat breakfast near some doors that someone could come through at any time!"

Violet wasn't paying much attention to his constant ramblings about their morning breakfast disaster, instead trying to pay as much attention to the forest around them for any signs of danger. She was getting increasingly frustrated as time went on; a mix of struggling to see where she was actually walking and Louis' non-stop nonsense making it hard to hear. She was mostly relying on Rosie to keep them safe, glancing down to see her happily trotting next to them, clearly not sensing any walkers in the area.

"-I mean, it's not that I don't feel bad about it, coz I do. I feel awful. I'm just saying that--"

"Louis" Violet hisses for him to stop, her patience finally running thin.  
"Could you please keep your mouth shut for more than two seconds?"

"Oh, come on, Vi" Louis brushes off her aggression, used to getting these sorts of reactions.  
"No need to be so uptight, we're perfectly safe. You can see theres no walkers around."

His carefree words only serve to irritate her further, grabbing hold of his arm to force him to stop and look at her.

"No, Louis. Unlike you, I actually _can't_ see."

"Thats not entirely true-"

" _Yes_ , it is. I can see a bit, but that doesn't mean I'm completly fine! That I'll be able to see all walkers coming our way!"

"But-"

"Now I have to rely more on hearing them coming rather than seeing, and your constant yammering doesn't help in the slightest"

Violet commences her walking after her outburst, leaving behind a slightly bewildered Louis. He feels the familiar burn of shame rising in his chest, his attempts at psyching her up clearly having failed.

Rosie whined from her spot next to him, looking between him and Violet, unsure of who to go to.

"Come on, girl" Louis said softly, a feeling of sadness beginning to settle alongside the shame.  
"Let's go and catch up"

Louis broke out into a slight jog in order to catch up to Violet, hearing the thunderous thuds of paws hitting the dirt as Rosie races alongside him, easily beating him to Violet. He chooses to respect Violets wishes, staying quiet as they walked until the familiar sight of the fishing shack came into view.

"You wait here and keep an eye out, I'll get the spears" Violet tells him, already making her way up the shacks crickety stairs to the door.

While he would have preferred checking the shack himself first for any danger, Louis knew that arguing with Violet when she was like this would be a lost cause. He shrugs, helpless to do anything but follow her instructions, surveying the land and flowing water in front of him for anything unusual.

Rosies deep bark startles him, wondering how the dog had managed to spot a walker that he couldn't see. He whirls around, checking everywhere he can see but seeing no sign of walkers in the area.

"What is it, girl?"

She barks again, staring intensely at a section of river nearby. He frowns as he squints in the direction she was barking at, trying to see whatever had caught the dogs attention. Now that he was looking closer, he could indeed see that there was  _something_ floating in the river, saved from being dragged all the way down stream by a rock it had been caught on.

"No friggen way..."

His heart jumps in excitement and disbelief when he realises what the object is, or at least, what it could be. The odds were next to impossible, and yet...

Louis wastes no time, running down the side of the river where it was and jumping straight into the water. The river was much too shallow for him to have to worry about lurking walkers under the waves, though the falls drop in temperature and the chilly bite of the wind did make the cold soak of his trousers that bit more unpleasant.

Rosie remained where she was, sat down in the drying grass with her head cocked to the side, watching Louis in curiosity as he splashed around in the water.

Louis' suspicions were confirmed now he was right up next to it, yanking the object from its confinement by the rocks with a delighted smile.

"Oh, Chairles. How I've missed you"

It was like a piece of his arm had been removed, and now sewn back together, reunited with his trusty weapon. His _signature_ weapon. Violet had her cleaver, Clementine had her knife and he had Chairles.

Weeks of being left in the water had taken its toll on the weapon, feeling how the wood had softened from the water that had soaked into it. At least it was freshwater, as he knew the weapon would be rotten by this point if it had been salt water instead.

"Just gotta hope the nails don't rust" Louis muttered to himself, nearly slipping on the rivers edge as he tried to clamber out, paying more attention to the weapon in his hands than where he was putting his feet.

"The _hell_  are you doing?" Violet asks in confusion, standing by the waters edge with two spears in hand, looking down at him with what he can only guess is shame.

"Vi, look!" Louis yells in excitement, pulling himself out of the water with Chairles in hand, stretching his hand out to show it to her.

"Is that..."

"It's Chairles!"

"God, I forgot you had named the damn thing...How the hell did you find it?"

"Last I saw him, he was on The Delta's boat. Guess when it exploded, Chairles was sent into the lake and made its way down here."

"He? You're really going to use pronouns with this thing?"

"It's not a _t_ _hing_ , it's Chairles!"

Violet rolls her eyes, not at all suprised by his answer. She glances down the other side of the stream, an idea beginning to form in her mind.

"Didn't AJ say he found Clems hat here too? In the river?"

"Uh, yeah, I think so? Why?"

"The river is fed by the lake, right? So I imagine a bunch of stuff on the boat got washed away, down this river."

"Okay..."

"If we set up one of the nets around here, we might be able to catch any stuff that floats by. Could be junk, but you never know what we could get. Plus, Willy's pretty good at turning junk into something useful."

"Thats...that actually a really good idea"

"I know it is, don't need an idiot like you telling me that"

"Don't make me push you in the river" Louis teased warningly, moving slightly closer with arms outstretched.

"I'm the one holding two spears, I'd like to see you try" Violet teases back, glaring at him with a tight hold on the two spears in question.

"Fine, I yield" Louis admitted defeat with a chuckle, holding out a hand for a spear that Violet diligently hands over to him.

"When was the last time we were out fishing? Just you and me, chilling by the waters edge?"

"Not long enough ago."

"Okay, first of all; ouch. Second of all-"

"Stop, you know I'm joking."

Louis gasped dramatically, bringing a hand up to his heart and looking at Violet in fake shock.

"You mean all this time, all those awful things you've said to me, you didn't mean them? Have I been sat here thinking you hate me this whole time? All those 'fuck offs', all those 'fuck yous', all those-"

"Louis?"

"Yes?"

"Shut up and fish"

He laughs at her exasperated tone, searching the river for any fish that swum by. A paticularly lazy fish floated up near him, clearly in no hurry to go anywhere. This proved to be a fatal flaw as Louis brought the spear down, pointed end piercing through its scales and flesh. He pulls the spear up, wincing at the blood that covered his fingers as he pulled the fish from the spear. You'd think that years of killing walkers and having his own finger cut off would make him used to the sight of blood, and yet his face still twisted in disgust at the sight.

There's a splash of water next to him, then an agitated curse from Violet. He turns his head to see she had missed whatever fish she had targeted for, end of the spear buried in the sand of the river bed.

"This sucks" She mutters under her breath, bringing up the spear ready to strike again.

"You okay?"

"It's... It's just that I can't see them properly. The fish. I think I can tell where they are, but they're not really there and now I can't aim for shit."

Louis frowned in sympathy, saddened by the frustration on her face. Without both eyes, her depth perception had become skewered. Still, he was sure that it was another thing she would be able to adjust to.

"Keep trying, I'm sure you'll get it."

"I doubt that" She mumbled miserably, turning her attention back to the passing fish.

Louis does the same, waiting with baited breath for a slower swimming fish to get close. A fish passed by, swimming fast but not as fast as the others. He thrusts the spear down where he assumes it will be, feeling resistance heavier than just water, lifting the spear to reveal another fish on the end.

Theres another splash from next to him as he drops the fish into the nearby bucket, looking over to see if Violet had been successful this time.

"God fucking dammit..."

Guess not...

Louis doesn't comment this time, knowing there was nothing he could say to make her feel better. Encouraging her would only piss her off, and trying to make a joke would piss her off even more.

There was barely any slow swimming fish anymore, the others having wisened up after seeing the fate of the others and the scent of blood in the water. Louis pushes the spear down the same time Violet does, hearing the sound of the spear entering the water. Though this time, its accompanied by a series of frequent splashes. Louis glanced over to see a fish at the end of Violets spear, the dying creature thrashing on the other end in a desperate bid to escape.

"You got one!" Louis exclaimed with a proud grin, seeing Violet was fighting off her own satisfied smile at her successful attempt.

"I guess so" Violet plays off her success, bringing her attention back to the fish in front of them.

The time sluggishly goes by, both of then only managing to snag a few fish as fishing slowly become harder and harder, the number of fish swimming by decreasing and those that did swimming much too fast for them to have much of a chance of catching them.

"I don't think we're going to have much more luck out here." Violet tells him, resting the blunt end of the spear on the ground next to her.

"You're probably right." Louis admits defeat, lowering his spear from his striking position.  
"We got a good haul though."

They head up to the stairs of the shack, Rosie sitting patiently just outside on lookout of the bucket full of fish while they enter the old, rotting shelter.

"I think Clem assigned you for some more fishing duty this week, plus we're planning on emptying out the greenhouse to plant those new seeds." Louis tells her as he places his spear back in place.  
"Not too sure when, but I'm pretty sure Clem has something for all of us to do. If you're interested in it, that is."

There's a long silence as he finishes putting the spear away, feeling slightly worried as to why Violet wasn't responding to his questions.

"Violet?"

She's not facing him. Shes staring directly at the wall to his right, transfixed by whatever it is she's looking at. Louis looks to her in concern, glancing over at the wall. His heart drops when he realises what she was staring at, the heart enclosed 'V + M' carving standing out as clear as when it was made a few years prior.

Louis opens his mouth, pausing when he realises he has no clue what to say. There's no way he can even begin to comprehend how she must be feeling right now. The sting of not only Minnie's death but her betrayal was an awful feeling, one that still remained deep inside him. If it made him feel this awful, it must be so much worse for Violet.

"I forced myself not to look at it, when I came in to get the spears. But... But I knew it was there, burning out of the corner of my vision, _mocking_  me."

Louis tore his line of sight from the carving, looking to Violet who was still staring at the carving as she spoke, he was unsure whether to him or just outloud.

"After we got back from the boat, I was bouncing around the blame. For what happened to Minnie, to Tenn, all of it. For some stupid reason, I blamed Clem first. Lillys deceptive words were still in my head, so it was easy to do so, to tell myself that none of it would have happened if Clementine wasn't here, that it was all her fault.  
Seeing her come back like that... Covered in blood and her leg gone, AJ so upset.... And you... God, I don't think I've ever seen you that broken. You were as bad as when Marlon died, and Clem hadn't even died."

"She nearly did" Louis whispers, barely able to get the words out.  
"Ruby lost her pulse and I... I thought that was it."

"After that, I couldn't find myself in it to blame her. Seeing just how fucked up she was I realised that it happened _fo_ _r_  us. She could have chosen not to rescue the rest of us, to just cut her losses and stay at the school with you guys, but she didn't. And she lost a leg for it."

"Violet, she doesn't-"

"She doesn't blame us for it. I know she doesn't." Violet cuts him off with a shake of her head.  
"So, I had to find someone else to blame. And despite Minnie being gone was part of the reason to be upset, I begun blaming her."

"Vi-" Louis tries to speak, but Violet shakes her head once more. He stays silent, allowing her to continue.

"When she started talking to me on the boat, saying about how everything would be better at the Delta, how everyone would be alive and well if Clementine had given everyone up, I believed her. How could I not? Here she was, alive and well, and there was Marlon, Brody and Mitch, dead.  
Minnie _lied_  to me. Lied to herself, too. She... She killed Sophie. And yet, when you told me what happened on the bridge, I _still_ couldn't believe it. How the sweet girl with the softest of voices, who couldn't even stand to kill a walker had willingly lead her own little brother to death, how... How _selfish_ she was for that, for all of it."

"It's okay for you to feel that way, Vi. What happened to Minnie is awful, but she did some awful things too."

Violet doesn't respond to his reassurances, still staring at the carving with a conflicted expression. Louis stares down as he shuffles his feet awkwardly where he stands, not knowing if the conversation was at the end or not.

"And you wanna know the worst part?" Violet whispers to him in asking, pain in her eyes as she finally turns to look at him.  
"A horrible part of me wanted to blame you too"

His gaze snaps up from the floor, locking eyes with Violet. A part of him had always expected her to say it, but hearing her say it outloud made it all the more worse.

"The fact that you were on the bridge that same night. You were there with him. And I _know_ you did all you could. I know that. At the same time, there was a part of me cursing you, that you should have done more to save him."

Tears are burning at his eyes now, doing nothing but to let them roll freely down his face, listening helplessly to Violets confession.

"I did it before then, too. That night Lilly came with her people and took us away. I had just risked everything to save her. She was seconds away from a bullet to the head. And as I was bring dragged away I watched. I watched as she looked at me, saw me struggling to escape and then... Then she looked at you. There was never a choice. Barely a moment of hesitation. It was the last thing I saw before that raider struck me round the head."

Louis doesn't trust himself to speak at this point, knowing that all will come out is a broken sound, no words physically able to form neither in his brain or his mouth.

"And as I sat there on that damn boat, listening to Minnie and Lilly, it was all I could think about. Even when Clementine was there doing her damn best to rescue us, trying to make me understand _why_  she did it, to make that choice. Even now... What will stop it from happening again? When danger comes, and it _will_ come, when its up to a choice, me or you? Who do you think she will save?"

"Thats... That's not exactly fair, Violet. We dont know if something like that could happen again."

Violet chuckles, though it doesn't sound humerous in the slightest.

"It will. It might not be the same type or situation, but _some_ sort of danger will come for us. And at the end of the day? She saved you. It will always be you, Louis. Always."

A silence fills the room after Violet finishes speaking, both just staring at one another in uncertainty. A new feeling of tension had been created between them, one that he had no idea how best to approach.

"I never got to say goodbye." Violet breaks the silence, returning her gaze to the carving.  
"Both before, when I thought walkers had got her and after, when they actually did. I was given a second chance to, and I didn't. Because I was so sure I had her back for good.  
Now I realise that... That it wouldn't have mattered. The only time it would have is before she left for that supply run with Marlon and Brody. Because if I had said goodbye to the Minnie on that boat? I wouldn't have said goodbye to the real Minnie. I would be saying goodbye to a shell."

A familiar look of frustration appears on her face, slowly turning to rage as she continues to speak.

"It took me so long to realise that all of this? It's not Clems fault. It's not your fault. It's not Minnie's fault. It's all that _fucking bitches faul_ t. Lilly and her godawful group. They took away _everything_."

Violet slips the cleaver from her pocket, and Louis feels himself take an instinctual step back from her and the weapon. She stands for a moment, silently seething before matching towards the wall with purpose.

He flinches when she strikes, bringing the cleaver down hard on the carving. The wood splintered under the force, chipping away from the wall as she brought the cleaver down again and again and again, each swing becoming less coordinated and more rage driven.

Finally, when the wall is but a mess of splinters and gaps, falls cold breeze seeping through the newly formed gash in the shacks side, the rage drains away. She let's her arm drop uselessly to her side, numbed fingers letting the blade drop down the floor with a metallic clang. The carving was no more.

She doesn't speak a word to him, turning from her own destruction and calmly heading outside as if nothing happened. Louis taked a few moments to gather his thoughts, wiping the tears off his face with his already stained sleeve before moving stiffly over to pick up Violets cleaver and storing it away safely.

His head snaps to the door when he hears Rosies frantic barking, easily making out the sound of her paws running away and then muffled growling, as if something was in her mouth.

Louis sprints out of the shack and onto the decking, stood frozen in shock and horror at the sight he was seeing. There was Violet, pinned up against a tree by a particularly tall walker. She was doing her best to fight it off, arms barely keeping the creature at bay whilst it's teeth clashed down painfully close to her face. Rosie had her own jaws clamped around the walkers legs, desperately trying to pull it away.

Louis snaps out of his shocked state, rushing over to Violets aid. His hands instinctively go into his pocket, pulling out Chairles as he charges towards her. He gets into distance, swinging Chairles with all his might. The corpses skull makes a sickening cracking sound, old rotting blood spraying onto Violet as its head caves in from the pressure.

He stands with Chairles still by his shoulder from the strike, chest heaving with panicked and exerted breaths as the corpse collapses to the side and off of Violet who seemed to be in a similar state of shock as he was, eyes following the walker as it dropped.

"Shit, are you okay?" He asks her frantically, lowering Chairles back down.

"I'm fine" She whispers quietly, still staring down at the decaying corpse beside her.

"Are you sure?" He asks again, bringing his arms up to brush at her own arms, checking over for any signs of a bite.

Her expression slowly begins to morph, shock turning to frustration. Frustration that he didn't know if it was aimed at him or herself.

"I told you I'm fine." She snaps at him, smacking away his hands.  
"Fucking thing came at me from the side with my bad eye and I didn't even see the damn thing."

"I'm sure-"

" _Dont_. Don't tell me you're sure I'll get used to it, or that you're sure it'll get better. I don't want to hear it."

Violet pushes him away, forcing him to step back and let her push her way past him and storm off in the direction of the school.

"Violet, wait-"

"Just leave me alone!"

Louis sighs, the mental side of the day exhausting him more than the physical side had. He wanted to give Violet her space right now, but knew that was foolish, especially as she no longer had a weapon at hand.

Rosie whined from next to him, tail wagging sadly as she watched Violets retreating form disappear into the woods.

"Go on, girl." Louis calls, grabbing the dogs attention.  
"Go follow her"

He points out into the woods, and Rosie is happy to comply, bounding off towards the woods and to Violet. Louis quickly heads over to the bucket full of fish they had left by the rivers edge, grabbing its handles and hurrying down the path to keep Violet in sight but make sure he was far back enough not to annoy her.

He hoped that this wouldn't be their friendship for the rest of time. Him desperate to keep her safe, but her only forcing him away, thinking it will keep herself safe...

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The school seemed oddly empty when they got back, not a person in the courtyard what so ever. No Aasim writing in his diary--uh--'History Book', no Ruby tending to the horses, not even Omar by the cooking pot.

The only one there was Willy, standing on watch up on the watch tower, waving to the two of them once they got close enough to the gates.

"Where is everyone?" Louis calls up to Willy, bucket of fish still in hand.

"Oh, right! Clem wanted me to tell you to go meet everyone by the greenhouse if you weren't back before they headed over. They've just gone now, so I don't think they've done anything yet."

After explaining, Willy begins climbing down from the watch tower, likely to join them on their walk over to the green house. Louis looks at Violet from the corner of his eye, not sure if they were back on speaking terms or not. To his surprise, she was also looking at him. Noticing his stare, she gives him a shrug of her shoulders, taking the bucket from his hands and heading into the school to store it, walking past Willy who was approaching, not even bothering to greet the younger boy.

"What's up with her?" Willy asks Louis with a frown, noticing Violets bad mood. Well, worse than usual anyway.

"It's a long story, don't worry about it."

"Should we go after her?" Willy asks worriedly, glancing back over his shoulder to where Violet had gone.

"No, I don't think thats best. She just needs some space right now, I'm sure she'll come meet us at the greenhouse when she's ready."

Willy shrugs in response, though there's still a hint of concern on his face as they turn away, making their way towards the greenhouse.

"You know, I never asked" Willy breaks the silence.

"Huh?"

"Did you ever go on that date with Clementine? I forgot to ask, what with the whole bomb thing and then Clem coming back without a leg."

It's not really all that funny, but for some reason the way Willy said it ticked him, a small laughing escaping him as they walked side by side.

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing, never mind. And yeah, yeah we did." Louis confirmed, unable to stop the pride leaking into his voice as he spoke.  
"Actually, I'm planning on another date tonight" Louis tells Willy, bending down to his height and whispering it to him despite there being no one else around.

"Planning to?"

"Well, yeah. I haven't actually asked her yet." Louis admits sheepishly, hearing Willy laugh in response.  
"I could actually use your help with it"

"Help? How?"

Louis puts his hand into his coat pocket, withdrawing a note he had written earlier in the day that asked Clementine to meet him in the music room after dinner (he may have also drawn a bunch of little hearts on it, but there was no need to show Willy that).

"I'm going to sneak this into Clementines pocket at some point during the day. There's a chance she might not notice it. If she doesn't, I need you to... 'Hint' at it if she doesn't notice it by the time dinner comes around."

"Why cant you?"

"Mostly, because its a surprise of course! And secondly, I need time to set the date up so I need someone to let her know that's not me."

Willy snorts from next to him, looking down to see a faint look of disgust on his face.

"Its kinda gross"

"What is?"

"You."

Louis raised an eyebrow in questioning, feeling slightly offended by Willy's judgement.

"I--I don't mean you specifically!" Willy is quick to correct himself, realising what he said.  
"I mean, you being all... Lovey dovey. Its the same with Ruby and Aasim. You've all changed. And that's good! But... Its also gross."

"I think you're hanging around AJ too much, you're starting to sound just like him." Louis jokes, hearing AJs own words in Willy's.

"So?" Willy challenges him, eyes squinted as if daring him to speak badly.

"Hey, I'm not complaining. In fact, I think it's great."

"You think it's... great?"

"Yeah... Its hard for AJ, you know? Poor kids only six, and he's never really been around people before. It's hard enough making friends in this world, but for him? It's gotta be tough. AJ needs nothing more than a friend and, quite frankly, so do you."

Willy nods sadly at his words, kicking at a loose stone by his feet as they walked, watching the pebble bounce across the ground which kicked up dirt and leaves as it went.

"He told me why he did it."

Willys cryptic statement catches him off guard, looking over to Willy who was walking with a thoughtfully yet saddened expression.

" _Who_  told you why the did _what_?"

"That night when we lost Tenn, when you guys were on the bridge."

Louis feels his muscles tense up, an involuntary response to whenever someone brings up that horrid night.

"AJ told me why he did it. When he was stood there, knowing he had to make a choice. To choose between Tenn, or you. And he picked you. He told me _why_ he picked you."

Louis mulled over Willys words. It was something he has thought about nearly every night, when his brain was cruelly reminding him of Tenns fate, seeing the blood spewing from his neck and the walkers rip and tear at this flesh everytime he closed his eyes. Tenn was AJ's best friend, his 'first real friend'. So _w_ _hy_ had he picked him instead?

"Why did he?" Louis asks Willy somewhat desperately, the insistent need to know the reason why burning away at his mind.

But Willy refuses to answer, shaking his head sadly at Louis' request.

"I shouldn't say. Its something you should hear from AJ, not me."

It was disappointing to hear, but also an answer he was somewhat expecting. He wasn't sure if that meant the reason why was a good reason, or a bad one. If it was something only AJ had the right to tell, it could be either...

The greenhouse comes into view, plants that had been left to grow having grown wild, wrapping around the greenhouse and poking out open windows. Grass and weeds had also been left unkempt, the vegetation on the outside nearly as impressive as in the inside.

Despite all this, it's Clementines voice that catches his attention the most as they draw closer to the greenhouse. Her voice is commanding, yet soft. Almost....alluring . He was sure she could instruct them all to jump into walker infested waters, and they would all do so glady, not doubting her for a second.

Well, he would anyway.

He comes to a stop at the entrance to the greenhouse grounds, leaning against the opening of the brick wall that surrounded the area, watching Clementine essentially boss everyone around with a smile on his face. Willy had stopped just ahead of him, looking back at him in confusion when he realised Louis has stopped. Willy looks to him, then to Clementine, realisation dawning on his face and looking back at Louis with yet another disgusted expression.

"See? Like I said; gross."

Willy doesn't give him time to respond, making his way over to join the others and get his own instructions. Louis rolls his eyes, an action he is used to receiving, not giving. Still, he follows Willy's lead, trailing slightly behind when he realises that Clementine was wrapping up her little speech, hoping that everyone would be heading out to do their chores by the time he reached her.

It works, being practically the last one there with just Omar left behind, the chef picking up a bucket filled near to the brim with rain water and an old, barely hanging together sponge as he shuffled over to the side of the greenhouse.

"Looked like you were having fun there." He teases as he gets to her, indicating at the others who were already hard at work. It had only been a minute and yet Ruby already had her hands buried in the soil, ripping out weeds.

"Not what I would call it." Clementine tells him, blowing out a quick huff of air to push away the lock of hair that had fallen into her face and glancing over at everyone as they worked.

"I just hope I'm not pushing everyone too hard. I know it seems like a lot, but what with the approaching winter and the rabbits seemingly dissappearing and all this business with Nathan and-"

Louis takes the opportunity, waiting for Clementine to turn her face back to him and quickly rushing forward to kiss her, interrupting her panicked ramblings. She squeaks ever so slightly at the sudden contact, but is quick to melt into his touch.

The moment of distraction is perfect, ever so slowly sneaking the note into her jacket pocket, praying she wouldn't feel his hand as he withdrew. He momentarily panics when she pushes him away suddenly, though he realises why when her face starts burning red, looking around frantically to see if anyone had seen.

"What was that about?" She hissed at him in embarrassment , keeping her voice low while still looking around at everyone else in a panic.  
"Seriously Louis, you--"

Something on his face seems to give her pause, the annoyed and embarrassed expression on her face changing to a concerned one in less than a second.

"What's wrong? What happened?"

Louis smiles sadly at her worried questions, feeling comforted knowing she truly did care about him. At times it seemed like she was the only one to see past him, to how he was really feeling.

"Me and Violet had a bit of a _t_ _alk."_

Theres no way she would know what they had talked about based on that, but her expression immediately softened at the emphasis on the word 'talk', reaching out her arms to hold his own.

"You okay?"

"Yeah... No... I will be."

Clementine glances behind him, the concerned look reappearing.

"Where is Violet?"

"She went to go store the fish we caught. One good thing, we caught quite a few today. Everyone gets a meal."

Clementine doesn't look reassured by his words, apparently more worried about Violet than their food situation right now.

"She just needed time to cool off a bit. If she doesn't come down in a bit, I'll go get her." Louis reassures her

"You sure she won't stab you?" Clementine jokes, a teasing smile on her face

"Of course not! Well, maybe..."

Clementine huffs in response, turning away from him to grab another bucket of water from the ground.

"Come on, we got work to do. Me, Omar and Willy are going to wash the windows, let a bit more sunlight into the greenhouse. These plants are gonna need all the warmth they can get during the winter"

"So what should I do?"

"For now, I need you to join Aasim, Ruby and AJ in digging out the old plants and weeds in the potting squares and refill them with soil if you dig too much out." Clementine instructs him, taking a moment to pause as she thinks.

"Oh, did you get that fertiliser from the fishing shack?"

Louis smacks his forehead with his hand, cursing himself for forgetting the fairly simply task.

"Shit, no, sorry. I didn't. Something kinda... Came up."

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Clementine assures him, able to pick up his tone of voice.  
"We'll grab it on the next trip."

"Any particular reason our tasks mean we're split up? Should I be worried?" Louis jokes, thought the self-conscious part of him doesn't seem to be joking completly

Clementine gives him a dumbfounded look, frowning at him from where she stands.

"Of course not. I'm going to be giving out instructions out here, so I need someone else to look over things in there."

"Me?" He splutters in disbelief, looking into the open door of the greenhouse to see everyone working away.  
"I don't know the first thing about gardening, you're better off asking Ruby to look over things."

"Louis, you'll be fine. You can do this no problem. If you can storm onto a heavily guarded boat to save your friends, I'm sure you can give out some instructions."

It sounded so simple when she put it like that...

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right. I can do this!"

She smiles at his now confident tone, waiting for him to smile back as a form of reassurance before turning away, making her way over to Omar and Willy who were already scrubbing away at the window panes, dirty water pouring down the glass as the fresh water mixed with the grime coated on the windows.

Louis steps into the greenhouse, immediately assaulted by the stifling hot air and the smell of decay from within. The others pause in their work when they notice him, though Louis is focused on locating the source of the smell, quickly identifying it as the two walkers laid across the ground, old dried blood stuck to their heads, clearly having died a while ago, but not that long ago.

"Hey, Aasim. Can you help me carry these guys outside? We should probably burn them." Louis calls over, nearly gagging at the overwhelming smell.

Aasim is by his side within seconds, picking up one of the walkers by its shoulders and slowly dragging it towards the door outside. Louis follow suit, grabbing the only remaining walker and pulling it with him.

He had always thought the world smelled shitty, but the air never seemed cleaner and fresher than when he stepped outside that greenhouse. Aasim had already dragged the walker to the edge of the forest, collecting sticks and leaves as he goes.

"Should use this as kindling." Aasim explains once he gets to him with his own walker, placing the sticks and leaves around the body.  
"Their clothes should act as kindling by their own, but this should definitely do the trick in case it doesn't."

Louis pulls out the matches he always carry around with him, taking note of how few remained. He plucks one out, striking it across the ignitor strip and watching the flame breathe to life. He covers the burning match with one hand to shield the flame from the wind, lowering it to the corpses and pressing ever so slightly against them. Smoke is quick to appear, followed by a small flame as the dry cloth of their clothes catch alight. He moves the match to different spots, making sure to light other pieces of clothing along with the dry leaves that surrounded them. The leaves catch instantly, the sticks burning after that and all of a sudden they had a roaring fire on their hands.

They stand back to watch for a moment, slightly disgusted by the sound of crackling flesh as the bodies burn in front of them.

"We should go back and join the others" Louis says to Aasim, who simply nodded on agreement to his words as he watched the dancing flames, finally pulling his gaze away and walking over to the greenhouse with Louis.

The smell was still there, but noticeably better now the bodies had been removed and some windows had been cracked open to air out the smell and let in some fresh air.

"Louis! Can I get ya' help with somethin'?" Ruby calls over to him, stood in front of one of the potting squares, now noticeably neater without all the weeds crawling all around it.

"I know we're supposed to be clearin' stuff out to make room for the new plants, but I was wondering if we could save a few?"

"Save what?"

"A few of these herbs and spices could be really useful for us. The wild ginger, garlic, chives, peppercorn.... You've tasted how much better Omars meals are with them, it would be a shame to lose 'em"

Louis' first instinct is to go find Clem and ask her, but he stops himself, remembering she had left him to make the decisions.

Ruby was definitely right with one thing; Omars stews and other dishes _had_ tasted so much better over the past few weeks. Not only that, but these were all plants that, as far as he knew, Nathan and his group _didn't_ have. Maybe it would be something they would be interested in their next trade.

"I think you're onto something there, Ruby. Save whatever plants you think are important enough, but we've got to make sure there's enough room for the new stuff"

"You got it" Ruby tells him cheerfully, turning back to continue her work, hands buried in the dirt once more.

Aasim is quick to head over to Ruby, and Louis backs away to give the two some space. He glances around the room, seeing AJ in the corner with his own potting square, struggling slightly with what seemed like a particularly difficult weed.

Louis heads over to him, pleased to see the beaming smile AJ gives him when he notices him.

"Hey, Louis! How was fishing?" AJ asks him, face twisted in effort as he pulled valiantly at the stubborn weed.

"It was great, bud. Caught loads of fish. One of them was so big, I think it might have been a shark!"

"Whoa, really?" AJ asks excitedly, how amazement giving him pause from his task.

"Guess you'll have to see at dinner, see if your fish is actually fish" Louis teases him, reaching for the weed AJ was having difficulty with.  
"You need some help with this?"

"No! I mean, maybe... Yes..." AJ admits, annoyed with himself at being unable to do as Clem had asked.

"Its okay, little man. I got this one." Louis tells him confidently, giving the offending plant a hard pull. To his surprise, the thing barely budges. Rather, he feels his body jolt as the plant refuses to move, slightly embarrassed when AJ had clearly noticed the failed attempt.

"Boy, this is a tough one." Louis mutters to himself, giving the weed yet another pull, harder this time. Theres barely any give, the damn thing remaining where it is. AJ is still staring at him, waiting for him to do something.

Now this was just getting down right embarrassing. It was a plant for crying out loud, surely a few tiny roots buried in some loose soil should be no match for him.

He readjusts his grip, keeping his hand tight as he begins to pull once more. He applys more and more pressure as he pulls, gritting his teeth with the effort it required. He feels the plant begun to give, the roots that seemed to have a death grip beginning to snap from the force.

"Hey, I think its-"

The weed goes from 'slightly budging' to 'completly severed' in a split second. His hand was still pulling however, yanking the weed out of its confinement and spraying loose soil all over the place. He had pulled too hard, the force of his hand continuing, resulting in him tripping backwards and crashing into the counters behind him, wincing at the sound of various tools smashing against the ground.

There's silence for only a few seconds, AJ stood with mouth agape, even Ruby and Aasim having been distracted by the sequence of events, staring at his collapsed form in dumbfoundment.

AJ is quick to break the silence, erupting into laughter at the sight of Louis still collapsed by the counter, now covered in soil and still clutching the weed that had done this to him. Louis can't help but laugh along, partly at the ridiculousness of the situation and at the contagious manner of AJ's giggles. Ruby is quick to join in with their laughter, followed swiftly by Aasims booming laughter, the hilarity of the situation cracking through his usual rough exterior.

"Don't know why you're laughing, Aasim. You're the one that's gonna clean all this up later" Louis raises his voice over their laughter.

"Nice try, Louis" Aasim responds, not falling for his bluff as he returns to his work with Ruby.

"Damn" Louis curses, standing to brush off the dirt that had gotten into his precious trench coat

"Swear!"

"Thats not a... Actually, kind of is. Sorry dude." Louis apologises to AJ, stepping forward to continue working with AJ.

They fall into a comfortable silence, working away at the potting squares. It takes longer than he thought it would, the repetitive motions of reaching into the soil, grabbing the unwanted plants and weeds from their roots and pulling them out, throwing them into bags they would later dump somewhere outside.

He notices that every now and then, AJ would glance up first at him, then over at Ruby and Aasim. AJ would do this every ten minutes or so, and Louis couldn't help but wonder the reason why.

After a while, Ruby and Aasim move onto another potting square whilst they still work on their own. AJ glances up at them again, seeing they were now the further away possible from them.

"Hey, Louis? Can I ask you something?" AJ asks in almost a whisper, a slight hint of fear in his voice.

Louis picks up on this immedietly, feeling concern well up in his chest as he looks down at AJ who is unable to look at him now, focused solely on the plants in his hands.

"Of course you can, AJ. Anything you need to know, just ask me"

There's a long gap of silence as AJ absentmindedly pats at the fresh soil they had poured in, squashing it down into place.

"Have you ever killed a person?"

Louis' hands freeze on his task, not at all expecting such a question from him. AJ had finally gotten the courage to look at him, staring directly at him as he waits for the answer.

"Yes, I have."

"Is it okay if I ask who?"

Louis squeezes his eyes shut tight, memories he had tried to repress reappearing. If his nightmares werent plagued by Marlon or Tenn, or even Lilly, they were usually of _her_. Of having to watch that arrow slide through the back of her mouth over and over, feel the warm blood splash over his hands as if it was really happening again, never able to realise its all just a dream until he shoots awake, drenched in sweat with Clementine to calm him down.

"It was back on that boat. Not long after Lilly had taken you. There was a scuffle, and Minnie had Clem pinned with a knife."

AJ's eyes widen at this, apparently having not heard the full story from Clementine.

"I was aiming at Minnie, telling her to stop and this raider appeared from nowhere behind me. I turned to face her and in complete shock... I accidentally fired."

"Accidentally? You didn't even mean to kill her?"

"Honestly? I don't even know. Either way, it happened. She was there and the next second she wasn't."

"But...but how did that get Minnie to stop attacking Clem?"

He can still hear Minnie's horrified yell of anguish to this day, calling out Dorians name in complete devestation as her lifelessly body collapsed to the floor by his feet that were trying to scramble away.

"The woman I killed, she... She really seemed to care about her. Minnie was distracted by... By what I had done and Clementine managed to knock her out."

"So... So if you hadn't done it, hadn't killed that woman, would Clem have died?"

Louis is ready to say 'no, of course not' but truth be told, he doesn't know. It seemed that Minnie was winning the fight, pointed end of the knife already having pierced Clementines chest. Who knows, perhaps if he hadn't served as that distraction, no matter how horrifying, it might just have stopped Minnie from pushing that blade down into Clementines heart.

"I--Maybe." Is all Louis can tell him.

There's another gap of silence, both of them thinking over the subject at hand. Like before, AJ is the one to break the silence with yet another shocking question.

"How did it make you feel?"

"What?" Louis splutters, looking down to AJ in disbelief at his question. 

"After you did it, how did you feel?"

"How did I feel? Horrible. Disgusted. Like I was _dirty_. I wanted to throw up, as if it would get rid of the sinking weight in my stomach."

His answer is of complete honesty, though it doesn't seem to be the answer AJ was looking for, the young boy looking away in uncertainty.

"Thats how I felt after what I did to Marlon" AJ confesses quietly to him  
"At the time, I thought I was doing the right thing, that Marlon was a monster and was going to kill us all. But, I also felt really bad. Like, throw up bad. Which is why I knew you were right when you called me a murderer, and when Clem agreed with you."

Louis blanched in slight shock. He had almost forgotten he had called AJ that in the heat of the moment, so it was a massive surprise to hear that Clementine had _agreed_ with him on the matter.

"Did... Did Clementine ever tell you about what happened on the boat? With that woman and with James, in the cave?" AJ questions him, steering the conversation elsewhere. 

"You mean Lilly? Clem told me she died in the explosion. Wait, James was with you in the cave?" Louis asked in confusion, never hearing that part from Clementine.

"Yeah, we found James outside the cave and he went with us into it. And..."

AJ had trailed off, a familiar look of anger appearing on his face as he thought.

"Lilly didn't die in the explosion. I killed her."

"You... What?"

AJ had done it? Been the one to have to kill _again_? Then why had Clementine lied to him about it, what truly went down that night.

"She was dragging me with her, talking all about how I'd love my new life with her group. Then this other woman came up to us and she had Tenn with her."

"So that's where Tenn had dissappeared to that night? He was on the boat?"

"Yeah. It wasn't just him. They had found James, too. Lilly spoke to him for a while, and she was talking to him like... Like he was nothing. Then she told the woman to kill James."

"She was going to kill him? Not keep him prisoner?" 

"She was about to, then everything happened all at once. Tenn grabbed Lillys gun to shoot her, but he couldn't do it. Lilly grabbed the gun back and was going to shoot Tenn-"

"What?!"

"I couldn't let her do it. I just couldn't so I--uh---I kind of... Bit her hand."

If the situation wasn't so awful, Louis would have laughed at the guilty look on AJ's face as he admitted this to him.

"Thats when Clementine tackled Lilly to the ground and James tackled the woman with rifle. I tried to help Clem, but Lilly just shoved me away. When Lilly smacked the knife out of Clems hands, I grabbed it and stabbed Lilly in the leg."

"And that killed her?" Louis asked, slightly confused as to how a knife to the leg would kill someone. Unless it hit an artery, that is.

"No. She was still fighting, kicking me away while she held Clementine against the edge of the boat. While they were still fighting, I grabbed the gun they had dropped."

Louis feels his heart drop, knowing where this was going. He hadn't heard any gunshots while escaping the boat, but that didn't mean there werent any as the massive amount of walkers groaning around them could easily have muffled any sounds.

"I was _so...angry._ I didn't even care when she started begging to let her go. All I could think about is how she had taken everyone away. She cut your finger off! I couldn't just let her get away with that!"

AJ was getting more upset as he spoke, voice raising in agitation as he remembered that night on the boat. He quickly stops talking, realising his raised tone might attract the attention of the others.

"Thats why when Clementine told me to shoot her, I did it without hesitation."

"Clem _told_  you to shoot her?"

"Yes. She did. I shot her, and I was _still_ angry. But... I also felt good. So I shot her again. And again. And again. Until James started screaming at me to stop. Lilly was covered in bullet holes, and there was _so_ much blood. That wasn't the worst thing though. When I looked at James, he was looking at me with this weird look on his face. I couldn't figure out what it was at first, but after the cave, I realised... he was disgusted with me. Except... I didn't really _care_ what James thought of me, not really, but seeing the way he looked at me, I wondered... Was Clementine right? To tell me to shoot? I wasn't sure _how_ she would have reacted to me now. If she would look proud of me, or disgusted like James was. She was neither. She... She looked scared. Scared of _me_."

He needed to sit down. All of this, it... It was a lot to take in all at once. He knows he has to say something though, as AJ is watching him, waiting expectantly for his response.

"I... I don't think she was scared _of_ you, buddy. I think she was scared _for_ you."

"I know. At least, I do now. She told me once we were in the cave. After..."

"After what?"

"James got really, _really_ angry"

Louis tensed up slightly at AJs words. He hadn't known James all that well, so he had no idea the kinds of things the guy was capable of.

"While we were trying to find a way out, he shoved Clem to the floor--"

"He WHAT?!"

AJ's eyes widened at Louis outburst, not too happy about how loud he was being. Aasim and Ruby had noticed his yell, glancing over to the two of them in concern but ultimately deciding to leave them be, carrying on with their own private conversation as they worked.

"What the hell did he do that for?" Louis asked, now making sure to keep his voice lowered.

"James thought that Clementine was raising me to be... To be a _monster_. That I could still be saved. He grabbed my arm and started dragging me away, but Clem wouldn't let him take me. He hit her and started threatening her, saying he would break her leg."

A white hot fury begins burning in his chest, in utter disbelief that this guy, this man who had agreed to help them would ever do such a thing, would make such awful threats to Clementine. He wasn't sure of James' fate, but a dark, usually buried part of him wanted to go find him and make sure his fate was confirmed.

"They were still fighting over me. I was trying so hard to get them to understand _why_ I had done what I did. So, I told them that I liked what I had done, I liked killing Lilly."

Every part of him was hoping that AJ didn't mean what he thought he meant. Saying he liked killing Lilly, it was... What about it did he like? Was it the actual act, of taking a life?

"I don't think I said it right though. Clem got scared _again_  and James... He just looked tired."

"What _did_ you mean then? When you said you liked it?"

"I didn't like _it_. AJ quickly corrected, looking slightly annoyed at the way Louis had changed the words.  
"What I liked is knowing she was gone. Lilly had done so many bad things, out of everyone, _she_ was the monster. I liked that by killing her, everyone else was safe. I didn't like that to do that, I had to kill someone. Killing doesn't make me happy, but knowing that a bad person is gone does."

Louis nods slowly as he takes everything in, feeling relieved beyond measure that AJ didn't enjoy killing. In fact, he kind of understood what the kid was trying to say. It was exactly how he had felt, about the whole situation with Dorian.

"Thats why I asked you" AJ interrupts his thoughts, speaking up when Louis hadn't  responded to his explanation.   
"About if you had killed and how you felt. I wanted to know if I was the only one that felt like this..."

"Hey, its okay little dude." Louis reassured AJ quietly, seeing the sad look on his face as he stared down guilty at his own shoes.  
"Actually, I felt the exact same way."

AJ didn't seem to expect this from him, head snapping back up from the ground to give Louis his full attention.

"You did?"

"Yeah, I did... It took awhile for me to realise it. During that whole time on the boat and escaping, the only way I could describe how I felt after killing her was... Nauseous. Sick to my stomach, in fact.  
But then, when we were heading back to the school, seperated from you guys, I had time to think. It was my first ever kill, something I hoped I would never have to do. Now I know that it is something I _can_ do. If it comes down to it, I know I can defend our home. I can never be glad to have killed someone, but I _am_ glad to know I have what it takes to make the hard calls."

"To make the hard calls..." AJ mutters quietly to himself.  
"Thanks Louis"

"You're more than welcome, bud" Louis tells him with a kind smile, placing a slightly dirtied hand on his shoulder and giving it a quick squeeze before returning to their work.

There's a part of him that wants to ask about what Willy had said, about the reason why AJ had made the ultimate hard call, to choose him instead of Tenn. It doesn't seem right now though, knowing how bringing up the topic would most likely upset AJ, as Tenns death was still fresh on everyone's mind. No, this was something that he would simply have to wait for AJ to bring up himself when he felt comfortable enough to do so. If he ever did, that is.

There was still one thing on his mind, however. He still didn't know exactly what became of James, other than his quite frankly unwarranted anger at the two of them.

"Hey AJ, if you don't mind me asking, what happened to James? I never saw him after you guys came out of the cave, so I kind of assumed the worst had happened."

"I don't know what happened to him." AJ answers with a shrug of his shoulders, small hands reaching into the bag of fresh soil.  
"After everything, Clem managed to calm him down and we realised the walkers were getting closer. James stayed behind to fend them off so we could escape."

Now he just felt like a dick. A few moments ago he was wishing harm to the guy, when in reality he didn't have the full story. One guy fighting off a herd of walkers all by himself was a certain death sentence, and he had willingly walked into that for Clementine and AJ, did what he could to help them despite the anger he must have been feeling towards them at that point."

"Shit, that's... Do you think he's...?"

"I hope not." AJ admitted quietly to him, visibly upset by the thought.  
"Even after what he did, James was... He was my friend. I really hope he found a way out of there."

"Me too, bud. Me too. "

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Clementine made her way over to the courtyard with an exhausted sigh, the ache in her leg making itself prominent with every step she took, feeling the way the prosthetic dug into the tender skin of her stump as it shifted in place. Doctor Williams did say it wouldnt be a perfect fit after all, so there wasn't much else she could do but accept the pain as it was.

She drops the nearly empty bucket of rainwater to the ground, seeing how dirty her face was in the reflection of the water within. The image is disturbed when she dips her hands into its surface, cupping some water and splashing her face, hoping to rub off some of the grime of the day.

Although she had done what she could to clean up, she could still see the dirt that clung to her clothing, knowing the others were likely to be in a similar state. Making a mental note to plan a trip to the river for some clothes washing, she heads over to the picnic table that was how bustling with activity, everyone excitedly waiting for tonight's meal. She plops down in the empty space next to Violet with a huff, needing extra effort to force her fake leg into place under the table.

As she sits at the table, she realises something seems... Off. That something about everything didn't quite seem right, but she couldn't put a finger on what it was.

"You look like shit"

Violets comment takes her slightly off guard, looking over to her with a raised eyebrow. Violets expression quickly turns to panic, realising that the person she was talking to wasn't Louis.

"Shit, I mean--You don't look like shit in a bad way, you look great! I just--uh, I meant that--"

It's a great relief to Violet when Clementine begins laughing at her panicked attempts at an apology, thankfully not offended by her blunt honesty.

"Don't worry, I know what you mean."

"Busy day?"

"Like you wouldn't believe..."

Violet gives her a small smile, though it doesn't quite seem to be completly genuine. Clementine remembers Louis' words from earlier in the day, how there had been a talk that had managed to upset them both.

"Hey, I just wanted to apologize" Violet tells her

"Apologize? What for?"

"For not helping you guys out in the greenhouse. I was going to, but then... I just couldn't."

"Did Louis try and find you?"

Violet huffs in laughter, nodding to confirm.

"Was practically trying to drag me out the door. He let go once I threatened to punch him, and when he realised I wasn't joking." Violet laughs after she says this, but it quickly dies off when she's sees Clementines worried look.  
"Don't worry, Clem. We're good, I promise. I just needed some alone time, and Louis... Well, you know how he is. Alone time doesn't really exist to him."

It was then that Clementine realized what it was that felt off to her. It was the fact that there was something missing from the table. Or rather, someone. A usually bubbly voice that tended to outspeak the rest, even if unintended, was not there.

"Has anyone seen Louis?" Clementine asks, feeling a sense of panic at his disappearance. She hadn't seen him since the greenhouse...

"Uh... Hey, Clem?"

Clementine turns her head back to the table, seeing the source of the voice was Willy, who was sat opposite and seemed oddly fidgety, as if anxious about something.

"Something in your pocket is about to fall out" He informs her, pointing to one of her jacket pockets.

"What? I don't have anything in my-"

She stops when her hands brush against something in her pockets, texture rough against her finger as she grabs the object and pulls it out, revealing a folded piece of paper. She frowns in confusion, unable to recall storing any paper in her pocket before she left the office.

Her fingers carefully unfold the paper, glancing down to see its contents. Handwriting that isn't hers stared back at her, a small note reading:

"Darling, come find me where we met"

She knew immedietly who had written the note, only one person in the school ever calling her that. If that wasn't enough of an indication, the small red hearts littered across the page sure were.

"You okay?" Violet asks, noticing how oddly still Clementine had gotten next to her.

"Hmm? Oh, yeah-I--I'll be back, gotta go sort something out." Clementine manages to stammer out, pushing herself out of the bench seat and hurrying towards the admin building, leaving behind a confused Violet who watched her go.

"Any idea what that was about?" Violet asked Willy, who also watched her go with a knowing grin.

"Yep."

"You gonna tell me?"

"Nope."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Louis? Are you in he-"

Clementine stops in her words, mouth dropping open as he took in the room she had walked into.

The music room had been cleared up as much as possible, usually discarded books returned to their proper place, toppled furniture righted and pushed to the back of the room, leaving a large space in the the middle of the room. The schools gramophone that, last she checked was in her room, has been moved back into this room. The room seemed much cleaner too, any dirt on the floor having been brushed away, even the curtains seem to have recieved a beating to rid them of the collected dust.

That wasn't the most impressive part though. It was the candles, so many candles spread _all_ across the room, bathing the entire space in a calming and gentle golden light. They were lined across the windows, up on the unused fireplace, on shelves and various other bits of furniture, along the outskirts of the floor and of course up on the piano, where they were usually found.

And there, in the middle of it all, was Louis. He had his usual kind smile on his face, though she could still see the nerves threatening to break through as he waited for her reaction.

There's so many things she wants to say and do. To tell him it was all beautiful, tell him that this was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her, to just rush over there and hug him, or kiss him, _something_  to let him know how much she loved him.

"W--What" Is all she can get out, still staring at it all in complete shock.

"I thought we might be due another date" Louis tells her, stepping towards her when she finds herself unable to move towards him as she intended.  
"So, what do you say? Fancy a piano lesson?"

She follows him in a daze, Louis leading her over to the piano, his hand gently holding hers and practically pulling her along with him. Louis is the first to take a seat, laughing quietly when Clementine continues to stare around the room in amazement as she takes her own seat.

"Sorry" Clementine apologises for her distraction with a small laugh of her own.  
"Its just... This must have taken you so long"

"Few hours, but it's absolutely worth it."

"I can't get over how beautiful it all is" She tells him, once again transfixed by the flickering glow that filled the room.

She was so focused on the entire room that it took her a while to realise that Louis wasn't observing the room as she was, but was instead looking at her. She glances over after feeling his stare on her, raising an eyebrow in questioning.

"You know what's funny?" Louis asks, still unable to take her eyes off her.

"What?"

"All the light in this room, how nice the glow of it is and yet, none of it _holds a candle_ to how beautiful the color of your eyes are."

Clementine doesn't quite know how to respond, snorting at the terrible attempt of a pun but also feeling her skin begin to flush at the compliment. Louis is smiling bashfully at her, a look of pride in his face for having made her laugh.

"That was super cheesy" She informs him, shaking her head at the ridiculousness of it all. 

"Yeah, but you love it."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that."

"There's no use denying it, Clem. I can see just how much you're blushing, you can't lie to me."

She curses her body's reaction for betraying her, annoyed yet flattered at how well he could read her at times.

"You're lucky I love you" Clementine teases him, lightly knocking her shoulder into his.

"Trust me, I still wake up every day wondering why"

That... Wasn't the response Clementine was hoping to hear. As glad as she is for him to open up to her like this, to admit how he is really feeling, it's always crushing to her him say things like that. To know how little he really thinks of himself, apparently to the point where he doesn't see why it is she loves him.

"So, how about some piano lessons?" Louis quickly returns to his joyful tone, wiping his face clean of any insecurity in a split second.

She knows he's trying to distract both her and himself, but she doesn't want to push him if he really doesn't feel like talking about it right now. It's something she knows she needs to talk to him about, but now didn't seen the time when he looked so genuinely excited about teaching her piano.

"I'd love to, but I've gotta warn you, I doubt I'll be very good at this" Clementine warns him, gingerly placing her hands on the piano keys, making sure not to put too much pressure on them.

"Nonsense, how could you be bad when you've got the best teacher in the world!" Louis declares confidently, reaching out his own hands to rest on the keys.

"Well-" Louis begins with a slight chuckle, flexing the fingers on his hand to bring attention to the space where his little finger used to be.  
"-As well as I can, anyway."

"I wouldn't worry about that. I once heard from a _very_  talented piano player that ' _you can play just as well with nine and a half._ '"

"Oh, really?" Louis responds, lowering his tone.

"Problem is, I don't think _this_  counts as nine and a half" Louis continues, wiggling what remains of his finger.  
"What do you say? Nine and an eighth, maybe?"

Clementine laughs openly at his joke, relieved he was able to find humor in the whole situation. Louis is quick to join in the contagious laughter as he drops his hand back down. As much as losing his finger had hurt, at least he had found a new way to make Clementine laugh about it.

"I think you should go tell this devilishly handsome talented piano player-"

"I never said he was handsome-" Clementine corrects him with a teasing smile

"Oh, but it was implied"

"At what point did it seem that-"

"Anyway, as I was saying, you should go tell this _devilishly handsome, overfilling with talent_  piano player that maybe, just maybe, he doesn't know what he's talking about."

"Oh, but I think he does. I think he's knows more than he himself thinks he does, but doesn't like to admit it."

"I doubt that" Louis mutters quietly, unable to bring himself to face her, keeping his eyes closed with his head lowered when he's unable to avoid her gaze.

A soft brush aginst the skin of his hand placed atop the piano keys forces his eyes open, glancing over to see that Clementine had covered his hand with her own, curling her fingers aginst the palm of his hand. He flips his hand over, allowing her to lock her fingers with his and give his hand a small squeeze. He closes his eyes once again, this time in comfort at the contact. Clementine didn't say a thing, and she didn't need to. It was starting to become their little thing. Whenever they were in times of distress, when words didn't seem to work, they were able to find a sense of comfort in a light squeeze of their hands, reassuring eachother that everything would be alright.

"Sorry, this date must really suck." Louis apologises with a sad chuckle, letting his hand slip from hers as he readjusts their position over the keys.

"No, it doesn't suck. Trust me Lou, as long as you're here, I'm happy. I don't think it would ever be possible to have _normal_ dates, but, then again, we're not exactly normal are we?"

"True. But that's what makes us Team Fun, right?" Louis asks with a joyful smile, quickly settling back into his usual upbeat self.

"Hmm, not without AJ we're not." Clementine points out to him, recalling AJ being there when the so called 'Team Fun' was formed.

"Damn, you got me there. Guess we'll just have to come up with a team name for the two of us. What do you think? Team... Best Couple? Team... Missing Fingers? Oh! What if we mash our names together! Something like Team Clouis, or maybe Team--"

"You know what, I'll leave that for you to decide" Clementine interrupts his endless thought process.  
"Anyway, why the sudden want to teach me piano? You've never mentioned wanting to before"

"It was something I had thought about every now and then, but recently I've felt the need to. In these past few months, you've taught me so much, taught everyone so much. You've taught us how to survive an attack, how to fight back and to plan an attack ourselves. You've taught us how harsh this world can really be, and what we can do not only to survive, but do it well. To prepare for these kinds of things, not just sit and hope it never happens."

"Of course I was going to teach you all I know. I care about you, Louis. About everyone here. I'm going to do everything I can to keep everyone alive."

"I know you will. And I can't even begin to think of what I can do to repay the favor. I started thinking about what I can do myself, what I have to give back, what I can teach you.  
It might not be as valuable as what youve taught us and it isn't to do with survival in the slightest, but what I _can_ do is play piano, and I would like to teach you it, if you want to."

Clementine could see just how unsure Louis was with himself as he offered her this. She could tell a part of him was expecting her to reject his offer, that he's expecting her to see learning piano as pointless. But she knows just how important the piano is to Louis, how much he cares about preserving the art of music. It was an honor that he was offering such a thing to her.

"Where do I start?" She asks him, gesturing at the seemingly endless row of piano keys stretched out in front of her.

Louis immediately perks up when he realises she actually wants to learn, straightening himself back up where he sits.

"I thought we could start with getting you to play a few notes of a song. I'll tell you what keys to press and then repeat this until eventually you do it so many times that you can play the first part without me helping you."

"Okay..." Clementine agrees, though with a hint of nervousness at the prospect of having to play in front of him, worried she would mess up.

"First note is this one" Louis tells her, pointing the key out for her.

It was hard to mess up while he was pointing out the notes to her, so there's no feeling of nerves when she reaches out to press down on the first key. Louis doesn't comment when the key produces its sound, so she assumes she had pressed the right key.

"The next bit needs three fingers, if you place your index finger here, your thumb here and then..."

It was surprising how quick the time seemed to go by as he taught her. Louis was indeed a good teacher, clearly explaining each part to her and keeping patient whenever some parts would confuse her. They had already gone through the section of song three times at this point, though seperated into little sections of notes as he went over with her which keys to press. Clementine had found the whole process relaxing. That is, until his next instructions.

"I think it's about time you play through on your own."

"I don't know..." She tells him, feeling the familiar ball of nerves in her stomach.

"Don't sweat it Clem, you've totally got this! No pressure from me! Well, not _no_ pressure."

"Youre really not helping."

"Fine, fine. I promise I'll only laugh if you mess up _really_ bad"

"Louis..."

"I'm joking!"

She can see that damn smirk of his out of the corner of her eye, making sure to shoot him her best dark glare, feeling oddly satisfied at the brief flash of fear across his face. Louis physically gulps, eyes now looking at everything but her.

"Uh, as I was saying, you got this" Louis attempts to back-peddle, voice cracking slightly in fear.

Clementine takes a deep breath to calm the bundle of nerves, giving herself a few moments so her hands would stop shaking. Her body gradually listens to her pleas, her racing heart beat slowing to a calmer pace, hands now as still as they can be. She puts her hands into the starting position Louis had taught her, and plays.

Having not heard the section of song in full, she has no idea whether what she's playing is right. Most of her attention is going to remembering what keys to press and where she should put her hands, whilst another part of her attention is focused on Louis, waiting for his reaction. If she messed up at anytime, she knew the only way to know would be by his reaction.

Except, he isn't really doing anything. Louis is watching her as she plays, a gentle smile on his lips as he does. Having his stare on her is more distracting than she thought, but she pushes herself to get through the part of the song he had taught her regardless. Clementine was so wrapped up in worrying about her playing that she didn't actually realise _what_ she was playing until she played the last few notes. Clementine groaned as it hit her, turning to Louis with an annoyed glare, only to see he was sporting a cocky grin as he had clearly realised she had figured it out.

"Did you seriously just spend two hours teaching me part of 'Oh My Darling'?"

"Perhaps" Louis responds, not seeking guilty in the slightest.  
"But I doubt it was two hours--"

Louis stops, looking around the room to see the candles he had placed out had melted quite a bit, a large puddle of dried wax pooled around the candles.

"Or, maybe it was..."

"Either way, thank you for this. It was fun, and definitely more challenging than I thought it would be." Clementine admits to him, flexing her hand with a slight wince of pain.  
"And more painful..."

"Don't worry about it, was the same for me when I first started. You'll get used to it as you play more."

"Should I take that to mean you'll be giving me more lessons?"

"Of course! Uh-- I mean--If you _want_ to of course, I'm not gonna force you to play if you don't want to"

"Louis, I literally just said I found it fun." Clementine calms down his panicked ramblings  
"I suppose we'll fit it in with out next batting practice"

"Oh, why of course. At least this time I can say it actually _is_ a date."

The room falls into a comfortable silence, the two of them finding a slight sense of peace from just sitting next to one another, the gentle light of the room making them feel seperate from the darkness of the night just beyond the window. They were deep into the night now, the moon high in the sky signaling just how late it really was.

"I had one last thing planned to end the night, if you don't mind" Louis tells Clementine in hushed tones as not to disturb the calmness of the room, standing from the piano.

Clementine turned from where she sat on the piano stool, watching Louis as he made his way over to the school gramophone. There's a record already sat below the needle, so Louis simply begun to crank the handle of the box, stepping back as a familiar song begins to play from the metal speaker.

It was the song they had first danced to, the night before they had rescued the others.

Clementines heart stutters in her chest slightly at the realisation. Louis makes his way over to her, stopping just as he reaches her and stretching out his hand for her to take.

"Care for a dance?" He asks her, just as he had done all those nights ago.

She's quicker to take his hand than last time, though it doesn't do anything to help the butterflies threatening to break free from her stomach as he leads her over to the middle of the room, into the space he has cleared earlier that day.

"I'm not sure how well I can do this..." She admits to him, glancing down at her prosthetic.

"I wasnt going to tell you this, but you were absolutely _awful_ at dancing when you had two legs. I doubt losing one is going to make much of a difference."

"Hey!" She protests, smacking his chest in mock offense, though the amused grin on her face doesn't exactly make it seemed like she was annoyed.

"Plus, I'm quite nervous myself" Louis tells her.

"Nervous? About what?"

"Not going to lie to you Clem, I'm kinda scared I'm going to step too close to these candles and set my coat on fire"

This coaxes another giggle out of her, something she realised she had done a lot tonight. In fact, it was something that had happened a lot over the past few months of being here. It used to be a rare thing for her, with AJ being the only one could get her to laugh on those countless nights out on the road. Now, here with Louis, it had become a normality, another reason to add to the ever growing list of why she loved him as much as she did

Louis smiles in response to her laughter, allowing himself a few moments to bask in the beautiful sound before he grabs her hand between his own, raising them up in front of them. Clementine is quick to follow his lead, resting her other hand on his shoulder and stepping closer to him.

There are soft smiles on both of their faces as they move around the room, somewhat stiffly as the fake leg did provide some resistance as Clementine stepped. She had to fight back a laugh anytime they stepped a bit too close to the candles for Louis' comfort, watching the way his face tensed up from its relaxed posture everytime they glanced by.

"I told you we'd dance to this song again" Louis whispers to her, not wanting to interrupt the song.

"When did you say that?" Clementine asks, racking her brains to remember when he had told her that.

"Oh, right. Nevermind, you were kind of unconscious at the time"

"Well, I'm glad you were right" She tells him, resting her head against his chest as they moved across the room.

"So am I, Clem. So am I"

The song comes to an end far too quickly for either of their liking, beginning to pull away from each other as they listen to the last few notes play. Clementine has a brief thought as to whether he's going to end the dance the same as last time when he suddenly dips her down, taking her by suprise once again.

This time however, he doesn't hesitate. She barely has a second to take in his warm brown eyes as they meet with her own before his lips are on hers, drinking in his familiar and comforting taste. His lips are slightly chapped from being outdoors all day, but she can still feel their usual softness as his mouth shifts against hers.

They part when the need to breathe gets too great, sucking in quick bursts of air as Louis hovers just above her. She could just about see how dilated his pupils were in the light of the candles, the usual ring of chocolate brown taken over by a pool of inky blackness.

"Good thing AJ didn't walk in again, huh?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for how long updates take. The good ol' 8-5 really does take up time and energy, huh?

The one thing he hated about hunting is hearing the rabbits panicked squeaks as it was held upside down, ensnared in the rope trap hanging by the trees. While he knows that its something they have to do in order to eat so they can have a chance of surviving, it never fails to make him feel awful knowing that the poor innocent creatures screams of fear were all due to his doing, to his own traps.

The one caught in this trap was particularly plump, more so than the ones he usually sees. Surely that was a good thing though, bigger rabbits meant more meat, and more meat meant more food for everyone back at the school.

Still, something about it seemed familiar, something that made his hands hesitate as he wrapped his hands around the animals neck, ready to snap.

“Whoa, whoa, wait!”

Louis turned from the trap, hand still placed around its neck to see Aasim jogging over to him with a few rabbits in his own hands, hanging by their ears. Louis cocks his head in questioning as to why Aasim stopped him when Aasim eventually gets to his side, stepping closer to inspect the rabbit in the snare.

“We’ve gotta release this one” Aasim tells him, placing the rabbits in his hands on the ground before beginning to untie the knots holding the live rabbit in place

“What for?” Louis asks, releasing his grip on the animal.

“You didn’t notice how big this one seemed?”

“Yeah, that’s exactly why I was about to kill it…”

“Its big for a reason. This ones pregnant, if we kill it than we’re also killing future rabbits, which could be future meals.” Aasim tells him, finally pulling the knot free and releasing the rabbit from the snares tight grip.

Aasim keeps a gentle yet firm hold on the rabbit, kneeling down to the ground and letting the rabbit crawl out of his hands, swiftly hopping away and into the forest, out of sight.

“Lets just hope nothing else gets it, huh Aasim” Louis jokes, turning away from where he watched the rabbit disappear to. To his surprise, Aasim is no longer kneeling on the ground. In fact, Aasim isn’t even there anymore.

“Aasim?”

Louis whirled around on the spot, taking in the surrounding forest, unable to see Aasim anywhere nearby. Aasim was literally just there a second ago, there’s no way he could have disappeared into the forest that quickly.

“Aasim!”

Something wasn’t right. Not just Aasim vanishing into thin air, but something about the entire forest wasn’t right. It was…much too quiet. The usual symphony of singing birds was gone, the occasional groan of a walker not to be heard, not even the usual whistling of the wind through the trees. It was as if time had frozen, leaving only him.

Except, it wasn’t just him.

An all too familiar figure was shrouded in the shadows of the forest, not too far from him. Any other time, seeing them would bring him a sense of comfort, but now it sent a cold feeling of dread down his spine.

Because he shouldn’t be here. Not when he saw that bullet go through his head.

“M--Marlon?”

Louis took a step back in horror as Marlon slowly advanced towards him, no longer covered by the darkness of the treeline. The sky had suddenly shifted, day turning to night within a split second, only able to see by the unnaturally bright moonlight that shone down on the two of them.

He wished there wasn’t any moonlight. Because now, he could clearly see the gaping hole in Marlon’s forehead, small streams of blood trickling out from the wound. Yet, Marlon still approached, giant smile on his face as he stepped closer and closer.

“What do you think, Louis? You guys always did make fun of my hair, I think this new change takes away peoples attention from it.”

“How…How are you…” Louis trembled, bile rising into his throat.

“Surprised to see me? I don’t blame you. Hmm, well, thats not _exactly_ true.”

“You…”

“I bet you were relieved. I could see the way you looked at me, whenever I didn’t agree to what you wanted. With me out of the picture, it got a whole lot easier for you, am I right?”

“What? Marlon, no, how could you think that?”

“Truth be told, I was kind of relieved myself. No more of your jokes, no more having to pretend like I give a shit, no more of your constant whining and complaining despite you living a pampered life in the damn apocalypse while we all worked our asses off.”

“I’m sorry…”

“You’re sorry? Really? That all you can say? You saw that kid come up to me with a gun, and you didn’t do a damn thing! I _needed_ you, and what did you do? You sided with _her_. A girl you had barely met instead of your best friend.”

“What did you want me to do!” Louis shouted back, finally snapping.  
“You killed Brody, and you lied about it! Told us Clementine had done it! Not only that, but you lied about Minnie and Sophie too!”

“I should never have taken her in” Marlon muttered darkly, lips curling into a snarl.  
“Should have just let her rot away in that car, let the walkers finish her and that brat of hers off”

“Don’t you fucking say that” Louis scolded him, finally getting the courage to step closer to Marlon  
“Who even are you? Coz I’m sure as fuck not speaking to my best friend.”

“Best friend?” Marlon snorted  
“Please. What kind of ‘best friend’ would just sit there and do nothing while his ‘best friend’ got shot through the fucking skull. You saw that kid sneak up behind me with a gun, let him shoot me without even saying a word.”

“You can’t seriously believe that? None of us saw AJ do it, we had no idea he had picked that gun back up. How the hell was I supposed to know he would do something like that? Jesus Marlon, I was the one who sobbed over your damn corpse!”

“You say that like it means something. I’m dead, Louis. And its all your fucking fault”

Marlon darted forward, shoving Louis back. Louis stumbled from the push, expecting to fall to the ground but instead colliding into something behind him. The sound of something gurgling makes his heart stop, turning to what he’s expecting to be a walker behind him and yet what he sees instead is so much worse.

Dorian is there, seemingly trying to speak to him but is only able to gurgle on the blood that had collected in her throat, bubbling and spilling out of her mouth. She stops her attempts, reaching a hand slowly up towards the back of her head. Louis watched on in horror as she grabbed the shaft of the arrow, yanking backwards and pulling the arrow out of her head, flinching at the spray of blood that came with the arrow.

Dorian brought the arrow in front of herself, glancing down at it in what almost seemed like curiosity. She lifts her head from the arrow to look at Louis, seemingly staring into his soul as she lifts her other hand to point her finger accusingly at him.

“I’m sorry…I’m so, so damn sorry… I didn’t mean to…”

“You’re like a record on repeat” Marlon spits from behind him, stepping around to stand next to Dorian

“Look at us. You did this. _You_. Do you really think sorry is going to be enough?”

“I didn’t know what else to do…” Louis babbled, stepping away from their spiteful glares.  
“I don’t know what to do…”

“Oh, I think you do.” Marlon accuses him, a knowing grin on his face.  
“What’s that old saying? An eye for an eye?”

Louis opens his mouth, ready to ask what he meant when Dorian advances forward, grabbing a hold of his throat and pushing him back with what feels like unnatural strength. His feet drag uselessly against the ground, scrambling for purchase, desperate to relieve the pressure on his throat. His back slams into a tree behind him, grasping at Dorians arms in an attempt to push them off him, choking for air as Dorian tightens her deathly grip.

There’s nothing he can do. Nothing but watch as Dorian lifts the arrow up in front of his face, pointing the blood stained arrow head towards him. Louis releases his grip on her arms, now grabbing at the arrow that she was continually pushing towards him.

“Please” He wheezes out, barely getting the words out past the fingers that were wrapped around his throat.

His strength seems to be no match for her own, watching as the sharp end of the arrow creeps closer and closer to his eye, feeling the pointed tip just begin to push into his socket.

Louis shoots upright in his bed, ripped out of his nightmare and gasping in shock as he brings a hand up to his face, feeling for the arrow he was sure would be sticking out of his eye. He feels slightly foolish when its not there, dropping his hand back down and flopping his whole body down onto the bed.

The room was so silent that you would be able to hear the clock hand ticking away the seconds, if the batteries hadn’t run out years ago that is. Usually the room would be filled with Aasims constant snores (that Aasim absolutely refuses to believe he does), but Aasim wasn’t in their room tonight, having headed down the dormitory hall to spend the night with Ruby. Like him, they would go between nights either sleeping in their usual room or being invited over to spend the night. Their new sleeping schedule now made it that him and Aasim barely slept in the same room anymore and as grumpy as Aasim can be as his roommate, he kind of missed him.

Especially now.

There’s no possibility of going back to sleep now. Instead, he pushes himself out of bed, slipping on his boots and grabbing his coat off the coat hanger as he steps out of the room, swinging the coat over his shoulders and pushing his arms through its sleeves, sinking into its familiar feel.

The air outside is surprisingly warm for a fall night, though its partly ruined by the chill breeze that brushes over his face as he makes his way over to the schools graveyard.

It had been a while since he had been here. Violet used to come here a lot to see Minnie, using it as her own way to mourn. It was something he could never do. His own way of mourning was to focus on the others, to do what he can do to push away everyone’s attention from what makes them sad. Visiting the graveyard did nothing but remind him of who they had lost, pushing him back into that stage where simply getting out of bed seems like an impossible task.

Now though, he was beginning to realise why Violet had done it. After that dream, he wanted nothing more to have a chat with Marlon. Even if he can’t hear him, he needs Marlon to know just how sorry he is for everything, something he should have done a long time ago.

To his surprise, there’s already someone in the graveyard. It seemed that Clementine was also having some trouble sleeping, and had made her way down the graveyard. She’s bent over something, huffing in exertion as she pushes an object down in the ground, twisting and turning to force it further into the dirt.

“Clem?”

She jumps slightly, head snapping over to him at his voice. She relaxes as soon as she sees him, stepping back from her work and gazing down at it. Louis steps up to her side, not saying a word as he joins her looking down at the object.

He frowns when he realises it’s a cross, one he didn’t recognise. The realisation dawns on him when he sees the name ‘James’ etched into the wood, looking over to Clementine in questioning.

“AJ told me about the talk you guys had in the greenhouse” She tells him, still gazing down at the cross.  
“I wanted to thank you, for cheering him up. Ever since that night, he’s been…off. I wasn’t sure if it was just with me but, he seems to feel a lot better.”

“He told me about Lilly. About what really happened that night. What he did to her, and what James did back in the cave.”

Clementine remains quiet, though he sees her nod to let him know she heard.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Clem? Why did you hide some parts from me?”

“Mostly? I was ashamed.” She confesses to him quietly, looking up from the cross to him. Small droplets of water hit his face, looking up to the sky to see the dark clouds forming above them.

“I could barely stand after that fight with Lilly. I didn’t even realise it was AJ who had picked up that gun until I managed to pull myself up from the railing and even then, knowing it was him that would have to do it, I told him. I told AJ to shoot her.  
God, I’m such a fucking hypocrite, aren’t I? Just a few weeks before, I was telling AJ that he was a murderer, that he was wrong to kill Marlon because he had given up, was no longer a threat. And then there was Lilly, pleading for her life and no longer a threat, and I went right ahead and told him to shoot her.”

Louis had no idea what to say. Having not been there, he had no way of knowing how things had really gone down, or how things _could_ have gone down. So instead he remains quiet, waiting for Clementine to continue.

“It was so selfish of me… I wasn’t thinking straight in the moment. All I could think about was all that Lilly had done, all the pain she had caused. I could see your finger getting chopped off so vividly in my head, over and over on repeat. Hear you scream in pain in my head and wishing I had done _something_ to stop it. All of that and…I wanted her gone, and I wanted her gone now. So I told him to do it…”

“AJ said something similar” Louis told her, shivering when he felt the temperature drop as the distance storm approached.  
“You have to know it’s not your fault about my finger, right? Minnie had her crossbow aimed at you and if you hadn’t stopped AJ from whatever he was doing, I… I don’t even want to think about what might have happened to him…”

Clementine smiled weakly at him, wrapping her arms around herself as the steadily increasing rain poured down on them, the water quickly beginning to soak through her clothes. Louis notices this, swiftly removing his coat and wrapping it around her shoulders. Clementine is quick to try and give him the coat back, but he places a hand over the coat to keep it in place.

“Wont you be cold?” She asks him worriedly, unconsciously wrapping the coat tighter around herself.

“I’d much rather be cold than have to watch you shiver and pretend you’re not.”

Clementine is looking at him weirdly after he says this, eyes scanning his face as if searching for something. He raises an amused eyebrow, wondering what it was she was thinking about to study him so intensely.

“Sometimes I wonder how you do it” She tells him, now looking straight into his eyes

“Do…what?”

“Care so much, without a fault. Even when it means you’re sacrificing your own comfort.” Clementine continues, shrugging her shoulders to bring attention to his coat  
“In every small thing you do for me, I can see how much you love me. Not only me, but AJ too. You love him so much, even after what he did and I can’t even begin to express my thanks for you forgiving him like that.”

“That doesn’t excuse how I reacted at first.” Louis admitted guiltily, shame twisting at his insides as he thought back on the way he had treated AJ.  
“Everything that I did, I shouldn’t have-“

“What happened, happened. And like I said before, I don’t blame you in the slightest. You had just lost your best friend. Any other group could have easily just shot us straight after. You all did the fair thing, you took a vote and even if it wasn’t the result I was hoping for, it was a fair one.”

Louis nodded at her words, returning his gaze down to the new cross in the ground in front of them. Had Clementine made it herself? And…why? AJ said it himself, they didn’t actually know what had happened to James, whether he was alive or not. So why the need for the cross?

“I hadn’t really thought about what happened to James. Not really." Clementine begins, noticing him staring inquizitivly at the cross.

"I buried myself into improvements for the school and everything’s that going on with Nathan and his group and just…tried not to think about it.  
Then AJ started talking about the night with James in the cave and I remembered how damn awful it was in there. Countless shadows on the cave walls of approaching walkers and James, he…walked straight into them. Without a second thought, he was willing to walk right into them with a knife in each hand. He had the mask but, I know from experience that covering your scent wont make a difference when you’re stabbing walkers…They might be dumb, but they can still see. They still know…  
He did that for us. If you had heard the things he had said to me, even to AJ, what he accused us of being. I don’t think ‘hate’ is a strong enough word for how he felt for us in that moment. And yet, he still walked right into that herd, all to give us a few moments of cover to escape.”

“Is that why you made the cross?” Louis asks softly, lifting a hand to lightly wave at James’ cross.

“I'll never be able to thank him for all he did. For saving us from Lilly and Abel, for helping to keep AJ alive after he got shot, for agreeing to send in all those walkers, knowing they would be slaughtered despite how much he cared for them. He barely knew us and yet, he was willing to die for us. This is the least I can do to honor his memory.”

The storm was right over them now, a torrential downpour of rain hitting them hard, making it hard to see even ten feet in front of them through the pounding rainwater, falling in a slanted manner from the force of the howling wind around them.

“We should probably head inside, this storms only going to get worse” Louis said, gently tugging at Clementines arm to encourage her towards the dorms with him.

Clementine doesn’t follow though. She remains where she stands, staring down at James’s cross. Her face is wet, and he realises with a start that its not just the rain pouring down her face, but also tears. He wants to get her out of this cold, but doesn’t want to force her away against her own will.

“I…I never knew you and James were that close.” Louis says, stepping closer to wrap his arms around her from behind, figuring it to be the best way to keep her warm if she wasn’t going to go back inside. Clementine closes her eyes, resisting his hold for a few moments before giving in, leaning back into him.

“Its not just that…” She whispers, barely audible over the sound of the wind and the rain hitting the ground.  
“Sometimes I wonder if this is a good idea”

“If _what’s_ a good idea?”

“Us”

Louis tenses, knowing she most likely felt his arms tighten around her. He feels even worse when she pushes herself away, dropping his arms to his sides as she turns to face him, her expression immedietly turning pained upon seeing the hurt on his face.

"What do you mean? Is it... Is it something I did?" Louis asks her, voice sounding completly broken

"No, it's not. You've done nothing wrong."

"Then... Then why..."

"Thats exactly the problem. You've done _nothing_ wrong. You always try to do the right thing and trust me, in this world, that will get you killed.  
I've had to watch it happen, over and over again. I'm always the one that has to watch people I care about leave, have to go through the healing process again and again every time they die. But with you-"

Clementine voice breaks off, throat tightening and stopping her from speaking when her emotions get the better of her.

"Losing my parents, losing Lee, that was one of the most painful things I ever had to go through. So, I started keeping myself distant from other people. AJ was all that mattered to me, and I was prepared to do anything to get him back.  
When I met Javi and his family, I told myself not to get involved. Whenever they did something nice to me, whenever they spoke to me, I told myself it wasn't worth it. I forced myself into thinking about their deaths and I would tell myself 'Is it worth it? The pain you imagine you would feel, imagine how much worse it would be if you got closer to them. Is that worth it?'"

"You can't really think that, Clem. You can't... How could it not be worth it?"

Clementine moves her tear filled gaze from him back down to James' cross, not bothering to wipe the tears that had escaped from her face as the falling rainwater was doing that for her.

"James. Tennesse. Marlon. Brody. Rebecca. Alvin. Kenny. Luke. Nick. Jane. Carlos. Sarah. Sarita. Christa. Omid. Carley. Doug. Duck. Katjaa. Mom. Dad. Lee.  
All people I've lost, one way or another. People I cared about. Everytime one of them died, a piece of me would break inside. I became less and less of that innocent little girl that Lee died to protect. Don't you see? Anyone that's around me is doomed. I thought maybe if I kept people away, I could save not only them, but myself."

Louis stood in shocked silence as Clementine rattled off the names of all those she knew, all that were now gone. Clementine now lifted her head from the cross, glancing back over at him.

"But then? I met you. Here was this joyous ball of energy that just didn't seem to fit in with this world. That would sing to me, would be kind to strangers, that would offer up his food to a kid he had just met.  
This boy who would find humor in the darkest of times, who, despite his pain and heartbreak, would run to the aid of someone who had just shot his best friend.  
And then there we were at that card game. You asked me if there was anyone I liked and as I looked up at you it all just... Clicked. It all suddenly hit me and I realised that yes, yes I _do_ like someone, and he was sitting right in front of me with an obnoxious grin."

The smile this coaxes out of him is quite the juxtaposition compared to the tears that are streaming down his face as he sits and takes in Clementines words.

"It was new, and it was exciting and I just ran with it. All of a sudden, none of that shit mattered. It was just you, nothing else.  
After a while, I couldn't stop myself. That constant nagging thought in the back of my mind. The voice that would whisper to me 'What if? What if something happens, and he dies? Is this worth it?'"

"Is it?" Louis asks her shakily, unsure if he wants to hear the answer.

Clementine seemed to hesitate for a second. It had all suddenly just dawned on her that in this moment, she’d spilled out her heart for the one boy she fell for.

But to hear him so shaken at the question, to see him unsure about the answer she could give him. God, it all seemed to click again, the tears streaming down his face just made her heart ache.

"Losing you? It would break me. In a way I never have been. I'm scared I'll shut down, that I won't find a way to cope. But now? It doesn't matter."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm in love with you." Clementine answers simply, such powerful words escaping from her lips as if they weren't as important as they are.  
"Because I am utterly, head over heels in love with you. And _nothing_ will change that."

The rain continues to pour around them, the gloomy and intense weather matching the atmosphere. Louis is stood there, mouth agape, struggling to find the words he wants to say to her.

So if you're asking me if you're worth it? If  _this_ is worth it? Then yes."She says through a shaky breath, voice barely above a whisper as she gazes up at him.

“Yes.” She repeats the word, nodding her head through tears as she says it, over and over.  
“It’s worth it. All of it. Every second makes it worth it to love you. No matter what happens, what has happened, all of it is worth it. I’ve lost so many people. I’ve had so many families, so many friends, but now? It’s all exactly what I could ask for.”

“You’re my family now, all of you here; but you?” She takes his hands in hers. “You’re more. All of that and more. And you make it worth it in this shitty world we’ve ended up in. You make every second worth it; all the fighting and the pain and the suffering. Because I get to spend my life now with you by my side through it all.”

All words seem to fail him in this situation, so he does the only thing he can think to do right now. He steps forward, hands gently grasping at the sides of her face as he kisses her, lips moving desperately, hoping it will get across what he is unable to say.

Clementine is kissing him back just as fiercely, bringing up her hands to hold onto his shoulders, feeling the rain drip off his dreads and into her face. She doesn't care though, not when she can feel the warmth of his body wrapped around hers, feel the way he pushed towards her, seemingly desperate to be as close to her as possible.

Louis is the one to break the kiss, resting his forhead against hers as he takes a moment to breathe.

"Don't you even think for a second-" Louis begins, struggling to speak as he continues to catch his breath.  
"-That I don't care about you in that same way. That I'm not absolutely terrified of having you taken away from us, taken away from _me_.  
Despite all that, even if someone told me that it would happen, that I would lose you? This time we've spent together, and the time that we have together, I wouldn't trade that away. I would not give that up, not even for a second. I need you to know that, Clem."

Clementine gives him a watery smile, lifting a hand to gently brush away the sopping wet dreads that had fallen into his face.

"You are my guiding light in this dark world. You are everything to me, and nothing will ever change that. I don't have much to offer you, nothing except for my love for you. And that, my darling, will always be yours. Forever and always."

\-------------------------------------------------------------  
1 Year Later  
\-------------------------------------------------------------

It didn't seem possible, and yet, this winter seemed much worse than the last.

Louis stood atop the watch tower, cursing the fact that it was his turn for watch, and would be for several more hours now. The snow was floating down peacefully around him, building up the few feet of snow that had already fallen overnight.

The cold season had changed the forest around them dramatically, the usual blanket of orange leaves replaced by a different blanket of pure white. It was like the world had been sucked of color, replacing everything with a much greyer, much simpler view. And yet, it still had its charm. Was beautiful, in fact.

It's just a shame he can't appreciate it from the warmth of the inside, instead having to freeze his ass off out here.

A shiver forces its way through his body, starting at the bottom of his spine and spreading throughout. Louis curses quietly to himself, wrapping his coat closer around himself in an attempt to warm up that seems to be to no avail. It's not long before his mouth joins in, wincing at the sound of his teeth chattering in response to the bitter cold.

He's distracted from the cold by the shaking of the watch tower under his feet, signalling that someone was climbing up the ladder to check on him. It takes a bit longer than usual but eventually the person comes into view, feeling himself smile unconsciously when he realises it's Clementine.

"Yep, still sucks climbing ladders with this thing", Clementime huffs as she gets to the last step, groaning with the effort as she stands.

Over the past year, Clementine had become incredibly efficient at using her new prosthetic. She was insistent on learning how to do everything she used to with it, and that was exactly what she did. She could never shake off that slight limp that came with it, as it would never compare to having her real leg. Still, it meant that she could have a real chance of survival out here, and that was something she would be eternally grateful to Nathan and his group for.

"You okay?" She asks, partly concerned but also slightly amused by just how violently he was shivering, a small pout on his face as he kept the coat wrapped tightly around him.

"I'm cold" Louis whined in complaint, sounding like a little kid.

"Come warm me up?" He asked, opening his coat in invitation.

She shakes her head as he expected, but to his surprise she makes her way over to him, walking straight into his outstretched arms and wrapping her arms around him. Louis wraps the coat around them, effectively smothering Clementine due to her smaller size, but she doesn't seem to mind.

"Jesus, Lou. You're freezing!" Clementine complains when she feels just how cold his skin was, cold enough for her to feel through his shirt.

"I did warn you." He responded with a chuckle, starting to feel slightly better not that he had some company.

"Wouldn't call that a warning, more like a general complaint" Clementine shot back

"Well, it got the information across, didn't it?"

"Smartass" Clementine mumbled under her breath, to which Louis retaliated by giving her side a quick pinch.

"So, any reason you decided to come and suffer out in the cold with me?" Louis asks as the wind picks up, throwing more snow into his face and reminding him just how freezing it was out here.

"Eh, its not much warmer in Marlons office because of that broken window. We'll have to find some old wood somewhere to board that up, I nearly froze to death last winter.  
I saw you out here from up on the balcony, thought you looked kinda lonely."

"Oh, so you're spying on me now? Is that it?" Louis teases her, knowing she can't escape when she's wrapped up like this.

"No, you ass" Clementine denied, and he was able to feel her glare without even seeing it  
"I wanted to take a break for a bit, and besides... I-"

Clementine muttered her next words into his coat, far too muffled and far too quiet for him to have any idea of what she said.

"Sorry, what was that?"

Clementine huffed and, despite her cheeks already being pretty red from the cold, he could still see them darken considerably, refusing to meet his eyes and instead choosing to stare down at her feet.

"I... Was kind of starting to miss you."

Louis' heart lept in his chest, as it usually did when she made such admissions to him. They never failed to catch him off guard, reminding him of how she had grown to care for him as much as he did for her.

"Oh, how the mighty have fallen!" Louis continued to tease.  
"The stoic Clementine, unable to stay away from me for more than a few minutes? My, how things have changed"

"Stop it" Clementine whined, burying her face further into his coat to hide her face from him, knowing how red it must be based on how warm her cheeks felt.

"If it makes you feel any better, I find that every second I'm not with you are seconds wasted"

While it does make her feel better to know her feelings are reciprocated, it does nothing to lessen the blush she can feel burning away on her face, standing out from the freezing cold state of the rest of her body.

Louis chuckles when she continues to hide herself in his layers of clothing, wrapping his coat around her as tight as he possibly can when he feels just how cold she had got in the few moments she had been out here. They stand together in a comfortable silence, listening to the gentle sounds of the snow hitting the ground, near silent but still detectable if you listened closely enough.

He had been so wrapped up in their moment of peace that it took him a whole to notice the change in the view. There were two specks approaching from within the forest, moving slowly towards them. The movements were odd, jagged like, making him think for a moment that they might be walkers. But no, the closer they got the more human like their features were.

"Thats weird... Omar and Willy left for hunting not too long ago, they shouldnt be back yet" Louis told Clementine, squinting as he struggled to make out who it was.

His heart dropped in his chest when he gave another look. He still couldn't quite make out who it was, but it was clear one of them was injured. They were barely walking, more dragged along by the person next to them, arm thrown over their shoulder for support as they struggled through the snow.

"Shit, I think something went wrong with the hunt" Louis told Clementine in a panic

Clementine didn't respond though. She was watching them approach, face paled considerably, as if she had seen a ghost. This did nothing to ease his fear, looking back over to the approaching pair who had gotten closer.

The one on the left was someone he didn't recognise. A girl, somewhere around their age by the looks of it. It was hard to tell though, considering her face was covered in blood. Her dark black hair was long, patches of it matted by the blood that had dried in it. It seemed she was out of it, if not completly unconscious as she was having to be dragged along.

The one on the right though, the one that was carrying her? He couldn't see their face, but he didn't need to. He would recognise that mask anywhere. A mask he never thought he'd see again.

"James?"

Clementines confused whisper kicks him into gear, rushing to the ladder of the watch tower and climbing down as quickly as he can, practically throwing himself off halfway and being saved from any risk of injury by the pile of snow he landed on with a soft 'thwop'.

"RUBY!" Louis yells over his shoulder as he runs over to the gate, hoping she would hear him from wherever she was inside. The metal of the gate is cold against his fingers as he pulls it open, darting forward to assist James.

"James? You're... I mean... How are you-"

"Not important. Not right now" James responded in his usual low tone.  
"Do you have a doctor of some sort?"

Louis is about to answer when he hears two pairs of frantic footsteps charging through the snow from behind him, turning to see Ruby and Aasim approaching from the dormitories.

"What is it? Has someone been-"

Ruby stops in her sentence, first taking in James before her eyes slide over to the girl he's holding up.

"Good lord! What on earth happened to her?"

"I'm not sure. Nothing good." James responded, stepping slightly closer to them.  
"I'm sure we can talk about this later, but for now she needs help."

"Of course. Aasim, help me bring her in."

James passed the girl on to the two of them gratefully, watching as Aasim and Ruby stood either side of her, keeping a careful hold as they helped bring her in to the school.

"Are you the leader here now?" James asked him. He could see the exhaustion in his eyes through the mask as he asked him this, most likely having carried her for a while through the woods.

"Me? No, of course not"

"No? If not you, then... Who?"

"That would be me"

Clementines voice comes from behind him, having finally made her way down the ladder to confront the man she thought was dead. Louis steps slightly to the side as he turns, giving Clementine room to step forward. James' eyes land on her, looking as shocked to see her as she was to see him.

James' eyes slip down to her prosthetic, a dawning look of realisation passing across his face before his eyes flick back up to her face.

Its an awkward few moments of the two just staring at one another, neither knowing what to say or do. The situation was uncomfortable, and Louis was beginning to wish he had gone with Aasim and Ruby to help the girl.

Suddenly, James begins walking rapidly over to to Clementine. Louis steps forward, ready to break up a potential fight. Clementine instinctively flinches, fully prepared for some sort of punch after the way they had left one another.

Louis doesn't need to break anything up however, when James instead throws his arms around Clementine, pulling her towards him in a rib-crushing hug. Clementine looks bewildered, taking a few moments out of shock to return the hug.

"I thought... I thought you were dead" James tells her as he pulls away from the hug, taking a step back

"Dead? No, I'm fine. Why would you think that?"

"After everything that happened, after the cave, I... I killed so many of them. I needed some time to think, so I went back to the barn. There were so many walkers outside and when I finally managed to get in there... There was so much blood and... And I found a leg. I saw it was yours and I assumed the worst had happened... "

"Not dead. I was bit, not long after we got out of the cave. We used your barn to escape the walkers and AJ chopped off my leg, I had completly forgotten we had left it there in the whole mess..."

"How the hell are _you_ alive, man?" Louis asked, joining in their conversation.  
"I mean, Clem told us you walked into a herd of walkers by yourself. How are you not dead?"

James turned his attention to Louis, almost seeming to have forgot he was there during his talk with Clementine. Seeing his eyes shift underneath that skin mask never failed to creep him out...

"I came close, a few times. I took out as many as I could before they became too much, and so I slipped away and hid in one of the cave tunnels. I thought I would never make it out of there... I'm certain I would not have survived, if it wasn't for my mask"

"James, I... I can't even begin to thank you enough for what you did. Not just back in the cave, but, well, everything else." Clementine said gratefully, directing James' attention back to her.

"It was the right thing to do" James responded, voice barely over a whisper in volume.

"Where have you been all this time?" Louis asked James curiously, wondering where the masked man could have gone that was nearby and yet wouldn't run into them.

"Wandering, mostly. Kept to myself, deep in the forests. When winter comes I make my way back here, stay near the barn for shelter in case the weather gets too bad."

"But...Why?" Clementine questions

"What do you mean?"

"Why didn't you come back here? I know you thought I was dead, but, the offer to stay here would still have stood"

James stared at Clementine for a few moments of silence before slowly rising his arms up to the back of his head, removing the mask which was accompanied by that awful squishing sound as he peeled it from his own face. James held the mask in his hands, looking down at it for a bit before answering.

"After everything that happened? I..." James trailed off, raising his gaze from the mask to look directly at Louis.  
"I didn't think I would be welcome here."

Louis knew where he was coming from. If AJ had come back to them, told them all about what James had said and done in the cave, and Clementine hadn't made it back, had succumbed to her bite? He wants to say he would at least be diplomatic with James, but deep down he knows that wouldn't be the case.

But, that _isn't_ what happened. Yes, James had made some awful threats to Clementine, and that was something he would always hold in the back of his mind. Still, that didn't take away from the fact that without James, they would have never been able to round up all those walkers, would never have gotten onto that boat to get everyone back, and without what could have easily ended up being a sacrifice, Clementine and AJ may have become overrun by all the walkers back in the cave.

"Listen, man. At the end of the day, you did things for people you barely know that could have easily gotten you killed. As far as I'm concerned, you saved Clem and AJ's lives. If Clementine says it's okay, you're more than welcome to stay here."

"Thats... That's good to hear. Thank you." James expressed his gratitude to Louis with a small smile, though it quickly dropped when he realised something, turning back to Clementine.  
"Where is AJ? I didn't see if you all made it out of the cave. Is he...?"

"He's fine. Growing taller by the day." Clementine told James proudly.

"Pretty sure the kids gonna outgrow me at this point" Louis added in, getting a small chuckle out of James.

"Good, I'm glad. And what about the other boy that was with you?"

And just like that, the happy atmosphere around them disappeared. Clementines and Louis' face immedietly dropped at the mention, something that James was easily able to pick up on. Realising this may be an awkward subject, James didn't say anything else, letting them decide whether they wanted to say anything.

"Its...its a complicated story." Clementine told James, exchanging worried glances with Louis.

"Doesn't matter right now." Louis said, wanting to steer the subject away from Tenn.  
"You mind telling us about this half dead girl you were carrying?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ruby was in full nurse mode when they eventually found them. They had placed the girl down in ~~Tenns~~   _the spare_ bed opposite Violets.  
Ruby, Aasim and Violet were in the room, attending to the girls injuries. Well, Aasim and Ruby were. Violet seemed unsure of what she could do to help, standing clear of them near the corner and watching them work.

"Honestly, I don't know much" James told Louis as they entered the room.  
"When I come back this way, I mostly keep to the outskirts of the woods, near the main road. I was walking near the edge of the clearing when I found her. She was lying by the side of the road, I nearly mistook her for a walker when I heard her cries of pain."

"Did she tell you her name?" Clementine asks.

James shakes his head.

"She was barely clinging to consciousness when I found her. She was awake, but I couldn't really get anything out of her, except..." James stopped in his sentence, looking down to the girl in sympathy.  
"She kept calling out for her parents"

The room falls silent at this, the only sounds coming from the bowl of water Ruby was dipping an old ratty cloth into, soaking it in water to clean off the dirt and blood from the girl to get a better look at her injuries.

"Was there anyone else with her?" Clementine asks, breaking the silence.

"Not that I could see. Only her." James answered.  
"I'm sorry to have to do this, but I didn't know what else to do. I have no medicine or supplies to help her, and I couldn't just leave her there." James said, mostly directing it towards Clementine.

Clementine is oddly quiet, watching attentively as Ruby does what she can for the injured girl. Louis catches her eye, and she gives a twitch of her head towards the door, hinting that she wanted to speak to him. Clementine slinks towards the door, opening it and exiting quietly.

"Uh, excuse me for a second." Louis said to James, quickly turning and making his way out of the room before anyone can question it.

Clementine stood outside the room door, biting anxiously at the nail of her thumb as she waited for him to exit the room. Louis closed the door gently behind him, frowning at the sight of Clementine so riled up.

"What's going on?"

"Doesn't this seem a little... Odd to you?"

"Odd? In what way?"

"This school is in the middle of nowhere. The only people you've ever ran into is the raiders and Nathan's group, both being very rare chance encounters"

"I suppose?"

"So... Where the hell did she come from? She was fairly near the school when James found her, she must have been walking for a long time before collapsing. There's no way she could have walked for days, even weeks with those kinds of injuries."

"So... So maybe it happened _while_ she was walking?"

"Maybe, but by what? Those are clearly human made injuries, but James said he didn't see anyone else with her. Why would people just attack her on the road and then... Just leave her be? That doesn't make sense."

"She might have escaped them? Or, maybe she..."

"Killed them?" Clementine finished for him, glancing to the closer door in concern.

"Clem, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying... I'm saying that... That maybe she wasn't the one attacked. Maybe she's the one doing the attacking."

"What? Clem, you can't be serious."

"I  _am._ Louis, you all saw what the raiders were like, what Lillys group was like. That's only a small part of the kind of people that are out there. If you had lived out there like I did, seen the things that I have and met the people I have? You'd know that the girl in there might not be as innocent as she seems."

"What are you suggesting we do then? What, we just, dump her out in the snow? Leave her to die?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

Violets voice came from the opened door, the blonde carefully slipping through and closing the door behind her before turning to face them with arms crossed.

"Are we seriously just going to kick her out?"

" _No_ , that's not what I was saying." Clementine replied in annoyance, pinching the bridge of her nose as she took a deep breath.  
"All I was trying to say is we don't know who she is, or how dangerous she could be. Maybe it would be best not to use our limited medical supplies on someone we don't know about.  
Perhaps we should wait for her to wake up, see what she can tell us about who she is, how she was injured and how she got here."

"But we can't just _not_ give her medical supplies. You saw the state she was in, she's going to be in a lot of pain!"

"I know. I know its awful, but we need to think about how much supplies we have left. What if someone else gets injured and needs it?"

"Exactly, _what if_. That might not even happen. But right now, there's someone that _does_ need it. I'm sorry Clem, but I can't agree with you on this one. It's just all too familiar to me."

"Too familiar?" Clementine questions him.

"I know what he means." Violet adds quietly, looking to Louis in understanding.

"Clem, it wasn't all that long ago that that girl in there? Was you." Louis points out. 

"Me? What are you-"

"When Marlon found you and AJ in that car crash, you basically near death, we didn't question who you were or what you might have done. Not right at that moment. There was never a question as to whether we should help or not. The only question is whether you were going to make it or not.  
You were a stranger to us, Clem. One chance encounter, and now our lives have changed forever."

"Exactly!" Clementine spat, stepping closer in annoyance.  
"If you had just left me and AJ in that car, Marlon would still be here. Brody would still be here. Tenn would still be here."

"Maybe." Louis admitted, also stepping closer to her.  
"Or maybe they wouldn't. Maybe they would still be dead, maybe we'd all be dead, or fighting in the Deltas war right now.  
If we had never helped you, had left you to die in that car? We would never have found out about the raiders, about Marlons deal with the twins. We would all be killed, or taken from our home. And I would never have met the love of my life."

Clementine takes a sharp intake of breath through her teeth, feeling her muscles relax slightly as the built up tension drains away at Louis' calming words.

"You might be right. She could be a murderer, or a raider, or God knows what else. But we don't _know_  that. I couldn't live with myself if we left a potentially innocent person to suffer, to fight through her wounds all on 'what ifs'." Louis pleads with Clementine, pointing to the closed door next to him.

Clementine released the breath she was holding, glancing tiredly to the door Louis was pointing at at. She moves her gaze to Violet, who was watching the two anxiously, then looks to Louis' pleading eyes.

"Okay... Alright, we'll do what we can. But we need someone to keep an eye on her, make sure she doesn't try to escape once she's awake."

"You mean like you did?" Violet accuses, a small teasing smile on her face.  
"Dont worry about it, I'll keep an eye on her."

"You sure?"

"Not much else I can do around here."

The door to Violets room opens, revealing Ruby who popped her head round the doorframe, jumping back slightly at how close they all were to the door.

"Everything alright?" Clementine asked Ruby.

"You should probably come take a look yourself." Ruby told her somewhat ominously.

The three of them gave eachother worried glances as Ruby slipped back through the door, filing back into Violets room one by one.

The once clear water in the bowl was now stained a deep red, the rag Ruby had used to clean the girl now in need of a thorough cleaning if it was to ever be used again.

With the blood cleaned from her, the extent of her injuries were clear. Her skin was _covered_ in bruises, a canvas of purple and greens standing out from the pale color of her skin. If that wasn't alarming enough, there was a mix of cuts spread across all parts of her body they could currently see, mostly across her face, neck and arms, but they had no idea if they continued beneath her clothes.

"Jesus..." Louis whispered, stepping closer to get a better look.

"How bad are these?" Clementine asks Ruby

"Nothing fatal, from what I can see. Her temperature is very low from being outside for so long, but it's starting to go back t' normal. No sign of a fever, and there's no pus in any of these cuts, so hopefully she won't have an infection."

"Do you think she was knocked out?" Louis asks, turning from the girl in the bed to address Ruby.

"No, I think she fell unconscious from a mix of things. The cuts aren't bad enough for her to bleed a whole lot, but she's been bleeding for a while. Poor things got to be exhausted, dehydrated and in a _lot_ of pain. It's no surprise she collapsed..."

"Will she be alright?" James asks

"Hopefully, yes. She's been out walking in God knows what with open wounds, there's always a chance for an infection to develop.  
Other than the bruises, there doesn't seem to be any major injuries to her head, so hopefully no concussion. With any luck, she'll be awake fairly soon."

"These cuts..." Clementine started, walking up to Louis' side to peer down at the injuries  
"Not all of them are recent. Same for the bruises, too. It's mostly hidden by the fresh cuts, but I can see there's some scarring here.  
Whoever did this? It's not the first time they did it."

"So, what? These asshole treated her like their own personal punching bag?" Violet questions angrily

"You said none of these are fatal, right Ruby?" Clementine asked, receiving a nod in confirmation from Ruby.

"Whoever was doing this knew what they were doing. They made sure not to do anything that would risk her life, but they wanted to make sure that she would be in a lot of pain."

"Sounds like they were torturing her" James pipes up from the corner of the room.

"I think it's more than that. If they had been torturing her for information, then she's resilient to say the least. These scars are weeks, maybe even _months_ old by the way they've formed over one another." Clementine tells the group, pointing to the scars that littered the girls skin.  
"Whoever did this to her? They've been doing it for a long time. And they wanted to make sure she suffered"


	5. Chapter 5

Clementine laid awake in the bed, barely able to make out anything around her in the darkness of the room. The lone candle sat on the desk beside the bed has long since blown out, plunging the room into a darkness that was only lit by the minimal moonlight that made its way through the bedrooms window.

Clementine turned her head, just about able to make out Louis' sleeping form next to her. He was laid out on his stomach, one arm thrown over the side of the bed and the other one curled around her waist. His face was half covered by the pillow he had burrowed into, the part of his face she could see was peaceful, showing no signs of the nightmares that usually plagued him.

Not wanting to disturb him, she carefully lifted his arm up that was wrapped around her waist, gently lowering it by his side. Other than a small shuffle to get more comfortable, he didn't seem to awaken. She pulled herself up from the bed as slowly as possible, reaching for her prosthetic that laid near the desk and quietly attaching it before standing up from the bed.

Clementine takes a step towards the bed opposite, instinctively going to check up on AJ when she remembered that this was Louis' room, and that AJ would be fast asleep in their room. She throws one more glance over her shoulder, checking to make sure Louis hadn't been disturbed before heading over to the door, exiting out into the dormitory halls.

The halls are dead silent, as they should be this time of night. The line of doors blur past her as she walks, feeling the temperature steadily drop as she gets closer and closer to the main door that would exit out into the court yard.

She pulls the door opens, listening to the old rusted metal hinges creak as they shift into place. The doors give one more creak and thud as they close behind her, and then there's nothing but silence. The cold of winter had sent most of the animals, including the insects, into hibernation, meaning the usual sounds of crickets chirping were no longer heard. The snow had ceased falling, but the deep blanket of snow still remained, a slightly hazardous icy path stretching out in front of the steps from the countless footsteps that have trampled over it.

"It's very cold, yet very beautiful this time of year"

The unexpected whisper makes Clementine jump on the spot, searching around for the source of the sound. She hadnt noticed that James was sat by himself on the school stairs, staring out to the courtyard in front of him, yet the statement was clearly addressed towards her as there was no one else around.

"Sorry, hope I didn't startle you." James apologises, now turning on his spot on the stairs to face her.

"Im usually the only one out here this time of night" Clementine tells him, struggling to sit down on the stairs next to him.  
"What's keeping you awake?"

"I don't usually sleep every night. I sleep one night, stay awake the other. Safer that way. Means if I'm somewhere I don't feel safe, I know I can stay awake and alert."

"Do you not feel safe here?"

"Not 'unsafe', just... Unsure."

It was understandable. Even if the school wasn't filled of people he didn't really know, it was still a new place. Even though she did her best to assure AJ he was safe at the school, she would be lying if she didn't say she felt uneasy the first few nights of sleeping at the school.

"Have you decided whether you want to stay at the school or not?" Clementine asks him.

She had re-offered him a place at the school, but he said it was something he would have to think about a bit more. James did decide to stay the night though, just to see if it was something he could yet used to.

"I'm still not sure. Being around so many people is nice, but also strangely exhausting. I'm not used to talking to so many people." James answers, giving a soft chuckle as he raises a hand to his face.  
"I think this is the longest time I've gone without my mask. It seems odd to sleep without it."

"Must be nice though, right? I could barely stand wearing it those few minutes in the cave..."

"It is kind of nice, yes. Not having to cover my face. At the same time, I feel oddly naked without it. Like a part of me is missing."

"Yeah, I know what you mean" Clementine said, patting the hard plastic of her prosthetic.

There was a long pause where James didn't say anything, so she looked over to him, only to see he was looking down at her fake leg with a hint of curiosity.

"I don't mean to stare, it's just that I've never seen someone do that before. It was rare for someone in the Whisperers to get bit, but it did happen sometimes. Usually with newer recruits. When it did happen, well... Like I said, there was no room for weakness in the group. You weren't considered strong enough if you had lost a limb, so if you were bit..."

James doesn't continue his sentence, but it's not hard to figure out the rest of the story. The Whisperers were a group she had thankfully never run into and, based on James' stories, she hopes they never will.

"I had seen it a few times before. I even had to amptutate someone's arm before, when they got bit during an escape." Clementine admitted.

"Did it work?"

"It might have, if it weren't for the fact we were escaping through a herd of walkers. She wasn't expecting me to do it, so she started screaming and the walkers all piled on her."

"So how did you know it would work this time?" James asked

"I didn't. It briefly crossed my mind shortly after it happened, but there were too many walkers around. By the time we got to the safety of the barn, I thought it was too late."

"But you did it anyway?"

"Not me, no. I didn't want to turn, the gun we had was out of bullets and all we had was a fire axe. It was awful of me to ask of him, but I was _scared_. So, I asked AJ to kill me. I could _feel_ myself fading, knew that it was the end, and I accepted that. AJ couldn't."

"Ive seen people turn before. Those that the Whisperers wanted to punish. The time it takes to turn is always different for everyone. Some turn within the hour, some don't turn until many hours later, sometimes the whole day. I suppose you were lucky that the infection spread slower."

"You know what's funny? Just a few minutes before I was bit, we were attacked by one of the surviving Delta members. It was actually where we got the axe from. During the fight, she brought the axe down on my leg and practically split it in half. When I got bit, the walker got me just underneath that wound."

"I'm sorry, why is that funny?"

"I was bleeding so much that I think _thats_ why I didn't turn as quick as I should have. If that raider had never attacked us, and gave me that injury? I doubt I would have survived that bite."

"Perhaps. If the injury to your leg was as bad as you say it is, you probably would have lost the leg anyway."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. As much as it sucks to have lost my leg, I'm just glad to be alive. And it's all thanks to AJ's quick thinking."

"How did AJ get you help after he cut off your leg? I saw myself just how much blood there was...and how many walkers."

"I passed out after the first, uh, 'attempt' of amputation, so I don't really know everything that happened. The basics I got from AJ was that he managed to cauterise the wound and got me into a wheelbarrow, then snuck me out covered in walker guts. He wheeled me all the way back to the school...  
I tried to ask Louis about it, but he doesn't like talking about it. No one does, really.  Ruby lost my pulse at some point and that was all Louis could tell me before he refused to say any more."

Apparently the clouds weren't empty yet, as the first few flakes of the night began to fall around them. The snowfall isn't too heavy, just a few gentle flakes floating down to the ground. Clementine reaches a hand out, smiling when a flake gets caught on her hand, skin cold enough that the flake didn't melt immediately on contact.

"You and Louis. You seem... Close?" James asks somewhat shyly, looking at Clementines outstretched hand rather than her face.

"That obvious, huh?" Clementine asks, dropping her hand back to her side

"Not so much from you, unless you look closely. Louis on the other hand, well..." James stops to chuckle  
"He gets this look on his face anytime he so much as looks as you. It's a look I'm more than familiar with. It was how I used to look at Charlie..."

Clementine frowns in sympathy, looking over to see James staring sadly down at the ground, arms resting on his knees. Clementine lifts a hand to place on his shoulder but stops herself, feeling she might be overstepping a boundary.

"He seems to be a good influence on you." James comments, lifting his head from the ground to look at Clementine as he talks to her.  
"You seem a lot happier."

"Yeah, I'd definitely say so. I don't know how I would have gotten through this past year without him. Both him and AJ, they've kept me going."

"AJ is very devoted to you. I can tell."

"I was all he had. And before we got to the school, he was all I had."

"And now?"

" 'And now' what?"

"You said 'before you got to the school'. What's changed?"

"What's changed?" Clementine huffed, looking behind her to the dormitory doors.  
"Everything. Now I have people that I care for, that I'm willing to do anything for. I have a family."

James nods, a small smile on his face at her words. They both turn their heads to gaze out to the courtyard in front of them, content to sit in each others company and watch the snow fall.

"You can be a part of that, if you want to." Clementine tells him, breaking the silence.  
"I know I've brought it up so many times, but it's true. Everyone really seems to like you. Willy seems especially infatuated with you."

"I think it's my mask more than me" James jokes  
"I need more time to think. I promise I'll give you an answer soon, just... Give me more time."

"I understand." Clementine said, shifting on the spot when the cold of the night seems to seep into her skin.  
"Maybe tomorrow I can give you a tour of the place?"

"Hope you don't mind, but I've already had a bit of a walk around the school grounds, just to get a brief look of the place"

"What do you think? Anything interesting?"

"Seems very secure, if the walls are anything to go by. I imagine that's how you were able to hold off the raiders as well as you did."

"Not well enough... Mitch was killed, Aasim, Violet and Omar were taken..."

"You did what you could. Besides, you got them back, didn't you?"

"Not everyone..." Clementine confesses, fiddling with her fingers in her lap as the usual guilt begins to knaw away at her.

"I saw the graveyard" James tells her, looking over to where the graveyard was.  
"I have to admit, I wasn't expecting to see a cross with my name on it"

"I tried to pretend for the longest time that you were alive, that you had found a way out against all odds. But you never returned. We never saw you out there, whenever we went out on hunts or scouting. I had to accept that you were gone, and it was my fault. Yet another name to add to the list."

"I'm truly touched that you cared enough to make that cross. To put my name in your graveyard. After leaving the Whisperers, I never thought I would have someone grieve over my death. Over... Me"

"Not just me." Clementine assured him.  
"Everyone here appreciates what you did. James, without you we wouldn't have been able to get on that boat. Violet, Omar and Aasim might have been gone forever. That's something we'll never forget"

"I doubt the same could be said for AJ" James said somewhat sadly, looking behind his shoulder to the dormitories behind them.  
"Considering everything that happened, I... I wouldn't blame him if he was angry to see me."

"What?" Clementine spluttered in disbelief.  
"James, AJ was as upset about losing you as I was. Even after I placed that cross, he refused to believe you were gone, would always hold onto that hope that you were still alive. You were his friend, James. You _are_ his friend. I'm sure of that."

"I hope you're right... I'll have to find him in the morning, go talk to him and see how he's doing myself. Have you told him that I'm still-"

"-Alive?" Clementine finished his sentence for him, shaking her head.  
"No, not yet. I... I didn't really know how. Whether to just tell him or let him see for himself."

"It's going to be a shock for him either way you do it" James warned, breaking his gaze with her.  
"There was something else I wanted to ask. About the graveyard."

"What is it?" Clementine queried, feeling a small bundle of nerves form in her stomach.

"I didn't really recognise many names, since I didn't really know the people here. But one of the names were on a cross that looked newer than the others, kind of like mine"

Clementine knew what he was going to ask, and she was dreading it. She wished he would just forget, to never mention it. This was a conversation she didn't want to have, not right now and definitely not with James.

"Tennessee. That was the boy with us in the caves, wasn't it? The one you said whose situation was 'complicated'. What happened to him?"

He wouldn't understand. Not like she did, not how Louis had, even if it did take him some time. She feared all this conversation would do was make him think he was right, to have tried to do what he did back in the cave. She just wanted to forget that _all_ of it happened.

"You remember that raider I mentioned, the one who attacked us and cut my leg?"

James nods, watching Clementine attentively.

"Her name was Minerva. She used to be a member of the school until she was taken. And she was Tenns sister.  
She got bit, back on the beach. First on the arm, then on the cheek."

"There's no surviving that." James noted sadly.

"No. And she knew it. She decided that if she was going to die, she wanted Tenn to go with her. The Delta, they... They really messed her up."

"I know what it's like." James whispered in admittance, staring down at his hands that he repeatedly clenched and unclenched.  
"The Whisperers, they turned me into someone I wasn't, someone I never thought I could be."

"God, they... They really broke her. If you had been with us that night, on the bridge...I can't even describe what she was like."

"Bridge?"

"Louis led us to a bridge that would take us back to the school. Except, Minnie had followed us the whole way there without any of us realising, and she had brought along some walkers too. The end of the bridge was out, and we were trapped." Clementine recalled the events of that night, taking a deep breath to ready herself.

"I tried to keep the walkers at bay, give Louis some time to get AJ and Tenn across the bridge. Minnie snuck up on me and after we fought, after she cut my leg, I managed to grab ahold of her gun and shoot her in the shoulder. She fell into the walkers, and they pulled her in.  
Tenn couldn't bear to leave her behind, and he tried to run to her. That's when... When... "

Clementine struggled with her words, tears burning at her eyes that felt freezing once they were exposed to the cold air.

"The walkers?"

"No. Not the walkers. Louis managed to get ahold of him, stop him from getting too close. He was trying so damn hard to snap Tenn out of it...The walkers were getting closer and I knew that if they didn't move, they would be gone. AJ realised that too.

I need you to understand, James. Tenn, he... He was AJ's best friend. And I don't say that lightly. When I said I was all AJ had, I meant that. I was all he knew. So for him to not only make friends at the school, but to have a best friend? Tenn meant a lot to him, meant a lot to me as well. But Louis was AJ's friend, too. AJ had to make a choice, one I don't think I could ever had made."

"What did he do?" Jamed whispered, though judging by the look on his face, he already had an idea of what had happened.

"He shot him. Louis was never going to let go of Tenn, would never have given up on him. If AJ hadn't done it, they both would have been devoured by those walkers."

"So you're saying it was okay? That you agree with what he did?" James expressed his disbelief, voice raising in agitation.

Clementine sighed, knowing that this was going to be the way the conversation went. Nothing she could do or say was going to effect that. She rubbed a hand tiredly over her eyes, dropping her hand back down to see James' calm expression, but could clearly see the anger boiling away behind his eyes.

"I wish there was another way it could have gone down. Hell, I wish I could have gone back in time and refused to take that damn bridge as a shortcut. But I can't. What happened, happened.  
What AJ did, he didn't do because he _wanted_ to. He didn't find enjoyment in it, didn't shoot Tenn out of anger, or out of 'bloodlust'. AJ saw two choices, to watch two of his closest friends die, or make a choice where he would have to kill one of his closest friends to save another. AJ saved Louis' life, I have no doubt about that. And that's something I can _never_ forget. Louis would not be here if it wasn't for AJ."

James' jaw shifted as he took in her words. He closed his eyes, breathing deeply through his nose before pushing himself up from the stairs, snow crunching under his feet as he stands.

"I wasn't there. I wasn't there, so I can't really judge what happened, what AJ did..." James said, looking down at Clementine who remained sitting on the stairs.

"You don't _know_ him. Not really. The parts you've seen of him, they're the parts of him meant for survival. You haven't seen him the way I have. You haven't see him giggle endlessly at one of Louis' crappy jokes, haven't seen the look of wonderment on his face the first time he heard a piano, or the excitement of playing games of catch with the group.  
You need to see him for what he is. He's a _kid_ , growing up in the damn apocalypse. You need to get to know him better, to see that he's more than just the things he's done. Because those awful things he's done, the things that you say are making him into a monster? He did them for what he thought were the right reasons, he did them to protect those he loves. Can you honestly say you wouldn't do the same, say that you haven't already done the same?"

"No" James admitted quitely, sounding defeated.  
"No, I couldn't."

"Please, give it a chance." Clementine begs, scrambling to her feet to stand alongside him.  
"I meant what I said back in the cave. If you keep with your philosophy, it _i_ _s_ going to get you killed. I've already had to grieve for you once, I don't think I could do it again."

James' is silent for a moment, looking to her pleading gaze as the wind whips around them. His eyes slide over to the closed gate and to the forest just beyond them, and then over to the dormitory doors behind them. Finally, his gaze lands back on Clementine, who waits for his answer with bated breath.

"Okay." He whispers, giving a small nod of his head.  
"I'll give it a chance."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you gave her the chance, Violet would gladly stay curled up, nice and warm in her bed the whole day. She would only pulls herself out of the comfort of the soft sheets the latest possible minute, and not a second sooner.

Today however, she was willing to get out of bed as soon as the sun began to peek out from the horizon. In fact, she hadn't got a wink of sleep the night before, unable to take her eyes off the unconscious girl opposite her. Even with the girls hands tied up to the bedpost next to her, secured with some old rope that had been stored in the basement (they had learnt the ineffectiveness of tape from Clementine), Violet couldn't get Clementines words out of her head, of the kind of person this girl could potentially be or the things she may have done.

As unnerved as it made her feel, its not like she could just leave. She had agreed to guard duty, to keep an eye on this girl and that was exactly what she was going to do. It would be creepy to _literally_ keep an eye on her, to just sit and watch her all day. So instead, she was working on a small project that Ruby had recommended for her. Well, not really Ruby. It was actually Aasim that had made the suggestion to Ruby, and Ruby had been the one to encourage her.

They had suggested for her to start keeping a journal. Obviously, she had refused at first. She and always been the one to watch in disgust at the girls in her class that gushed over their diary, giggling endlessly with one another about the cute boys they had written about, hidden away from prying eyes within the confines of their journal. Aasim and Ruby had assured her that that wasn't what the journal would be all about, that it was more for just writing down what came to mind.

In the times where her thoughts and emotions were overwhelming her, she would take a moment to collect herself by writing down every thought that popped into her head, along with how she was feeling at the time and what she was doing or what had been happening when they occurred. It was a way for her to properly reflect on her emotions, to get an understanding of why she was feeling the way she was. As much as she hated to admit it, it was working. It was the closest thing to therapeutic something could feel for her, and as ridiculous as it made her feel, it made her feel better just as equally.

As it was still early in the morning, no one had yet to rise from their slumber. Well, except for her that is. All she could hear was the sound of her own pencil scratching against the paper, occasionally interrupted as she takes a moment to think, replaced by the sound of the end of the pencil repeatedly hitting against the desk as she distractedly tapped the pencil down, staring blankly down at the paper in front of her.

There a brief moment of silence where she's making no noise, pencil hovering in place over the paper. She's about to put the tip of the pencil back down when a new sound catches her attention. It's the sound of bed sheets rustling against themselves, and the sound of rope shifting, rubbing against something.

Violet drops the pencil in her hand, turning in the rickety wooden chair to face where the sounds were coming from. It seemed their new visitor was very much awake.

And very much afraid.

Her eyes were wide in alarm, pools of deep blue darting around the room she was held in. The girls attention was naturally diverted first to the binds that held her, giving a firm pull to test their strength. Upon seeing that they didn't even budge, her fear began to esculate, breaths coming shorter yet quicker. She had been so caught up in he situation she was in that she hadn't noticed Violet in the room until her eyes passed over her on her scan of the room.

Violet was sure that sitting frozen in place without saying a thing couldn't be helping the girls fear in the slightest but, truth be told, she was feeling just as nervous as the girl must have been. Neither one of them knew what to make of the other, of what kind of danger they might have been.

The other girl is the first to move, shuffling closer to the wall behind her and away from Violet. She gives another helpless tug at the ropes, a look of despair and hopelessness flashing across her face when she realises just how trapped she truly was.

"Hey, I uh..." Violet began, not knowing what to say to this clearly terrified girl.  
"I promise I won't do anything to hurt you so long as you do the same. I don't know what possibly could have happened to you to get in this state, but you're safe now"

The girl seemed to calm down slightly now that Violet had spoken to her, though there was still a hint of distrust in her eyes as she listened to what Violet had to say.

"These don't really make me feel 'safe'." The girl responded, pulling down at the ropes that were wrapped tightly around her wrists.

"Yeah, sorry about that..." Violet apologises sheepishly, raising a hand to rub at the back of her neck.  
"In our defence, it's not for your safety. It's for ours."

"Ours?" The girl questioned  
"It's more than just you?"

"There's more than just me, yeah." Violet answered, not wanting to give away too much about the others to this girl just yet.

"I thought... Everything is just so fuzzy, was it... Was it not you that carried me here?"

"Me? God no, there's no way I could have carried you all the way back here. I mean, I look fairly different from the guy that brought you here."

"I don't remember much of being carried here. I woke up at some point barely able to see someone holding me up as we walked through a forest, but I honestly didn't know if it was real or not, if I was dreaming."

The girl went to move her position when something stopped her in her tracks, face twisting in pain and fists clenching at the agony that shot through her arms as the rough rope caught against the fresh cuts on her arms, still felt even through the many layers of gauze that had been wrapped around them.

"Where is 'here', exactly?" The girl questioned after the pain subsided, keeping herself still after giving up on the idea of moving any further.

" 's not 'anywhere', really. A school, out in the middle of nowhere."

"A school?" The girl wondered, glancing around the room she was kept in.  
"A boarding school, I assume?"

"Yeah. Well, it _was_ , anyway."

"I know this may sound odd, but... Are we still in Virginia?"

Violet couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at the girls question. She was right, it _did_ sound odd. What the hell could have possibly happened to this girl that she was unsure of what _state_ she might be in.

"Uh, yeah? Still Virginia."

Knowing this seems to reassure the girl somewhat, arms no longer straining so tightly against the ropes that ensnared her hands. Violet feels a pang of guilt at seeing how tightly the rope still dug into her skin, most likely causing some pain, if not some discomfort to the wounds she knew laid just beneath the bandages.

"You said you don't remember much. Do you... At least remember your name?"

The girl brings her eyes up from the bedsheets she was staring down at, now looking to Violet. There's a brief pause where she doesn't move a muscle before she gives a small, barely there nod of her head.

"Zara" She gives her name somewhat quietly and roughly, pausing to clear her throat before continuing.  
"My name is Zara"

There another pause of silence, Zara's eyes slipping away from Violets gaze as the seconds of silence that tick by become more and more awkward.

"You, uh... Gonna tell me your name or...?"

"Oh, shit, sorry. I kind of forgot that's how things go." Violet apologises, giving a nervous sounding chuckle.  
"I'm Violet."

"Violet." Zara repeated, liking the way the name sounded.  
"It's a nice name."

"I always hated it." Violet admitted  
"Too many jokes about the color, the flower, even the damn candy."

"You mean Parma Violets?" Zara asked with a light laugh  
"I suppose I can see where you're coming from. Still, it suits you. A pretty name for a pretty girl."

Violets cheeks darken the same time as Zaras, the other girls eyes widening in alarm before quickly darting to whatever else in the room she could look at that wasn't Violet.

"Uh, ignore me. Mostly the blood loss talking..."

"Don't worry about it" Violet mumbled quietly, standing from the chair.  
"I, uh... We should probably go find Clementine, tell her you're awake."

Violet stepped closer to Zara to reach for the rope tied round her arms, but stopped when Zara flinched away from the sudden movement.

"I'm just going to untie you from the rope, I'm not going to hurt you." Violet assures Zara, keeping her hands visible to try and make Zara feel safer. Zara stares at her for a moment before nodding, allowing Violet to step closer.

Violet grabbed hold of the rope, moving her hands to the knot and pulling, the rope quickly pulling free and becoming loose. Zara waits patiently for the rope to be completly moved and for Violet to step away before lowering her hands gingerly, wincing at every movement of her arms.

"Not gonna lie, part of me was expecting you to attack me." Violet admitted

"Even if I wanted to, I couldn't. Not without being in a lot of pain..." Zara responded, gently cradling one damaged arm with the other.  
"So... Who is Clementine?"

"Oh, right, keep forgetting you dont know people. Clementine is sort of like, our leader."

"Wait, you're not the leader?"

Violet can't help but snort at the question, shaking her head with an amused smile.

"No I'm not, thank God. Already got a taste of that, and it is definitely not for me." Violet tells her, waiting for Zara to painstakingly bring herself to her feet before heading towards the door to the room.

"Well, you seemed like a leader to me."

"Just you wait till you meet Clementine. You'll realise how wrong you are."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You're asking me if this prestigious boarding school let the kids roam around the area?" Louis asked somewhat sarcastically, bringing up his legs to rest on the desk as he leaned back in his chair.  
"Afraid that's a big fat no, Clem."

"I find it hard to believe you were the kind of kid to follow the rules"

"While you're absolutely right there, I'm afraid I've got nothing for you. Sure, me and Marlon would sneak out every now and then but this place is surrounded by forest. We would have had to walk for hours to come across something that's not, y'know, trees."

Clementine sighed irritably, bringing the roughly drawn up map of the school closer. She had begun replicating the map onto another piece of paper, this one slightly somewhat smaller and less detailed. She wanted to begin marking down noticable landmarks around the school, anything that might be useful to them.

"No mention of a city, town, shops, anything nearby?"

"No one talked about anything like that, no. School supplies were delivered straight to the school, and all I can remember of the drive here was, well-"

"Trees?"

"Bingo"

Clementine sighed once more as she leaned back in her chair, eyes flicking from the piece of paper in front of her to Louis' feet on her desk, a frown immediately appearing on her face.

"Could you not put your dirty shoes on my desk?"

"Oh, it's _your_ desk now?"

"I'm the one that's using it, so yes"

"Not true! My feet are currently using it"

The sound of the door opening distracted Clementine from chastising Louis further, moving her gaze to the door and Louis having to completly twist his body to see the newcomer.

"I wasn't too sure whether to knock, I didn't want to disturb you, so..." James apologised, slipping through the small gap and closing the door gently behind him.

"Considering Clems the one that asked for you to be dragged up here, I'm pretty sure we're the ones disturbing you" Louis responded, waving a hand at the spare chair next to him  
"Take a seat"

"Oh, um... No, that's fine. I'll stand, if you don't mind"

"Suit yourself, man" Louis replied with a shrug of his shoulders, turning his attention back to Clementine.

James walks over to the desk, standing slightly back and observing the two bits of paper sprawled out across the surface of the desk.

"What did you need me for?" James asked, glancing from the papers to Clementine.

"First of all, to catch you up on everything that's happened. That's of importance, anyway." Clementine responded  
"And maybe, you'll have some information that we can use?"

"I suppose that depends on what you want to ask"

"Well, let's see... So, not long after everything that happened with the Delta, we ran into another group. Not the whole group, from what we can tell." Clementine told him, pushing the map towards James and pointing to where they ran into them

"The leader is a guy named Nathan. They drive an old looking caravan of sorts" Louis added

"We've been trading with them for the past year or so, meeting up every few months to see what there is for trade and generally to check on how each group is doing."

"What kind of things have you been trading?"

"Generally, it changes every trade. Our needs change as time goes on, same as theirs. We've given them medical supplies, food, herbs and building materials. In return they've given us their own food, seeds, and after a few trades..."

Clementine trailed off, reaching behind her and untucking a pistol from her jeans, laying it down carefully on the desk.

"They even begun trading us ammo."

The sight of the weapon visibly made James look uncomfortable, but he doesn't make a comment on it.

"They're trading you ammo... That's usually a rare resource."

"Not for them, apparently" Louis noted, sitting up properly in his chair and dropping his feet from the desk.  
"You should see some of what they've got. Weapons I've never seen before..."

"Do you think they can be trusted?"

"They haven't given us a reason not to. They've been nothing but friendly to us, haven't been prying for information in the slightest. They even gave me this." Clementine tells him, pushing the chair she sat in back slightly so James could see the prosthetic she was mentioning.  
"All they're interested in is keeping this trade going, and making sure we're all doing alright."

"I'm not too stubborn to admit that we probably would have struggled big time without their help these last winters. I mean, I've seen Aasim freak out about the food situation before but this time... I've never seen him so certain we were in trouble" Louis admits

"What do you need from me, then?"

"Well, we can never be too safe, right? I wanted to know if you've ever heard anything about Nathan and his group, if you've ever ran into them, maybe even ran into someone that's ran into them?"

"Does the group have a name?"

"Not that they've said."

"You've never asked?"

"They didn't ask us much. We thought it was only fair to do the same." Louis replied

"To say I've 'came across' people isn't exactly something that's happened. I've never _met_ other people, but I've _seen_ a few survivors out there. What does their leader look like?"

"He's an older guy, maybe late forties, early fifties. Black and gray hair that's fairly short, green eyes." Clementine describes Nathan to him, watching for any signs of recognition on James' face

"Probably carrying a huge ass rifle" Louis adds to the description, half joking half being completly sincere.

"Sorry, I can't say I've ever seen anyone like that. Never really seen any working vehicles around here either, especially not a caravan."

"Well, no news is good news, right?" Louis asks, standing from the chair and stretching his arms over his head until he hears his joints pop.

"Thats definitely one way to look at it." Clementine agreed, watching Louis as he moved over to the broken window by the balcony.  
"There was something else I wanted to ask you, too. Since you said you basically wander around the area.  
We've got another trade with Nathan's group coming up. Problem is, we don't have much to offer right now. I want to go out on a scavenging trip, but we don't know much about the area around the school. I was wondering if you knew of anywhere nearby where we might be able to find some supplies?"

"I might, actually." James commented, leaning over the desk to grab a crayon and pull the new map towards him.

"There was a fairly decent sized building, not too far off the main road. I can't be completly accurate, but I think it was around-" James drew a large square not too far off the main road, tapping the crayon to the square once done.  
"-Here. It was fairly well hidden, I'm honestly suprised I came across it. It looked run down, but not like there had been many people there. Just... Abondened. Like most other buildings were at the start of all this."

"Any idea what kind of building it was?"

"Judging by the size? It seemed almost like a large shopping centre."

"You mean like a mall?" Clementine asked, a hint of excitement in her voice

"Something like that, yes."

"Uh, guys?" Louis called over his shoulder, still looking outside the window to the courtyard.  
"Just a heads up, kid incoming"

Sure enough, they hear the main door to the schools slam close from downstairs, quickly followed by pounding footsteps up the stairs, unquestionably those of a child.

"Hey, Clem! Violets looking for you, I don't really know what she was talking about but she said that 'the girl' is awake and they need to find you so they-" AJ babbled on, coming to an arubpt halt when he noticed someone in the room that shouldn't have been there.

"Um, hello AJ" James greeted AJ awkwardly, giving the young boy a small wave, not knowing what else to do or say.

"James!" AJ yells in delight, running full speed at James and colliding into his legs, wrapping his small arms around the older man.  
"I knew it! I knew you were alive! See Clem, didn't I tell you!"

"You sure did, goofball." Clementine agreed with a happy grin as she reached for the water bottle on the desk, relieved to see how excited AJ was to see James again.

"Clementine and Louis were right, you _have_ grown quite a bit." James commented, getting over his shock of the unexpected affection to give AJ a few pats to his back.

"Omar says its all thanks to his cooking, and since we've got all this food growing in the greenhouse now"

"Is that so?"

"Have you seen the greenhouse? It's awesome! There's _so_ many plants growing in there now. Do you wanna go see?"

"Oh, well maybe in a few-"

"Are you staying with us now? Where are you sleeping? Maybe you could sleep in my room, it'll be fun!"

"Aren't you sharing the room with Clementine?" James can't stop the smile that creeps up on his face at AJs constant excited questions

"Oh, we are. But she spends so much time sleeping with Louis, I'm sure she can start sleeping in Louis' room, right Clem?"

Clementine chokes on the mouthful of water she had begun to take a sip of from her bottle, covering her mouth as she attempts to clear her throat.

"AJ!" She scolds once the water clears from her windpipe, though the scolding isn't really as effective when Louis is laughing his ass off by the window at AJ's innocence and Clementines reaction.

"What?" AJ's asks in confusion the same time Louis comments "That was fantastic, never change AJ" as he wipes the tears of laughter from his eyes

Clementine shakes her head, pulling the map closer to her to look at where James had marked the mall, comparing it to where the school is to try and figure out how far away it was. It didn't seem too far, but it also didn't seem close, either...

"Any idea how far away this is?" Clementine asks James, taking his attention away from AJ

"On foot? I'd guess a day, maybe more?"

"Are we going somewhere?" AJ steps closer to desk, standing on his tip-toes to get a better look at what Clementine was holding.

"Seems like it. James said he saw an old mall, thought we might go check it out"

"What's a mall?"

"It was this big building with a bunch of shops in it, where you could buy pretty much whatever you wanted" Louis told AJ, stepping away from the window and over to the desk and then hopping up to take a seat, much to Clementines displeasure.

"Oh. That's sounds cool! Can I go?"

"Wouldn't want anyone else watching my back"

Clementine turns her head over to Louis when she heads an annoyed 'ahem', rolling her eyes when she sees him looking to her with a teasing glare, arms crossed in fake irritation.

"Dont worry, you're coming too, Lou"

"Would you like me to join you?" James offers his assistance

"No, that's okay" Clementine denies his aid.   
"We'll be leaving in a few days, hopefully the weather will have cleared up a bit by then. You'll need some time to adjust to living here, get to know some of the people here, get used to hunting schedules, things like that.  
We'll still need an extra person, though. We don't want to risk ourselves spending too much time at this mall, four should be enough to scour the place for whatevers left. Who do you think? Omar? Aasim?"

"I could do it"

They were so wrapped up in their conversation that they didn't notice the new person who had slipped through the door. Now being seen, Zara pushed herself further into the room, closely followed by Violet.

"You want to help us with a scavenging run?" Clementine asked, slightly taken aback by the offer and her sudden appearance.  
"You've only just met us, why are you so eager to help?"

"You all saved my life. Patched me up with _your_ medical supplies, when you didn't need to. If you need some help, any at all, I'm more than happy to give it."

Louis and Clementine look to eachother with an eyebrow raised, though Louis has a 'See, I told you so' smile on his face.

"You sure you'll be okay for it?" Clementine says as she looks to Zaras bandaged arms and bruised face.

Zara lifts her arms up, looking down at them and flipping them over, holding them up for a moment and then dropping them back to her sides.

"Right now? No, I wouldn't be okay for it. But you said you're not planning to go until a couple more days, right? I'm sure I'll be good to go by then."

The room falls into a stunned silence, most of the occupants looking to one another in questioning while Zara waits patiently for their response. AJ seems unsure of everything that's going on, swiveling his head around to everyone and try to figure out what was going on.

"Well then" Clementine began with a soft chuckle, standing from the desk and walking over to Zara.  
"I suppose we should introduce you to everyone. I'm Clementine, and this-" Clementine curled and arm around AJs shoulders, smiling down at the younger boy.  
"Is AJ"

"Hello!" AJ greeted as enthusiastic as ever.

"Hey there, dude" Zara greeted AJ back just as enthusiastically, crouching down to AJs height.  
"Names Zara"

"Thats James over there" Clementine pointed to James in the corner of the room, who gave Zara a small wave in hello.  
"James here is actually the guy who found you out in the snow and brought you back here."

"That was you?" Zara asks as she stands back up. 

"Um, yes?" James responded somewhat puzzled, shuffling his feet. He couldn't help but feel somewhat offended by the tone of confusion in her voice.

"Oh...Well, um... Thank you, I guess? Although I'm not sure if just saying 'thank you' will be enough for dragging me through the snow"

"I wasn't just going to leave you". James assured her  
"Besides, what you're offering to do now is a start."

"I assume you know Violet already?" Clementine asked Zara, looking over her shoulder to Violet who remained by the door.

"Yeah, we've been, uh 'acquainted'" Zara answered, shooting a smile over to Violet who gave her own timid one in response.

"Saving the best for last, eh Clem?" Louis joked, pushing himself off the desk and towards Zara with a hand outstretched.

"Hey, I'm Louis-"

Louis can't get another word in before Zara flinched violently away from him, causing Louis to take an instinctive step back and pulling his outstretched arm back towards himself. Zara went stumbling back into Violet who shot her arms out to catch her, preventing Zara from falling any further.

"Whoa, you okay?" Violet says worriedly as she gently pushes Zara forward, keeping a hold on her for a second and giving Zara a chance to stabalise herself.

"Y--Yeah. I'm fine. I'm okay" Zara stammers over her words quietly, saying the words both to everyone in the room and partly to herself in assurance.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to... To react like that, I--I don't know what..."

Zara stops in her rambles, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath to regain her composure. She opens her eyes again to see everyone staring at her in bewilderment, wondering what it is that could have made her react so strongly.

"Sorry, its... Louis, right?" Zara steps closer to Louis, though slowly and not seeming quite as confident in her own movements.

"Uh, yeah" Louis confirms, looking over to Clementine in questioning who gives a small shug of her shoulders.

"You sure you're okay?" Louis checks as he slowly lifts his hand back up in offering, not wanting to startle her again.

Zaras eyes flicker down to his outstretched hand, taking a moment before clasping his hand in her own, giving it a firm shake in greeting. Louis smiles kindly at her as they drop their hands back down, hoping to make Zara feel more comfortable. It seems to work somewhat, as Zara gives him a half smile in return before quickly scurrying back to Violets side.

"Hey AJ, would you mind taking Zara out to the courtyard to find Omar, see if he can make her something to eat and introduce her to everyone else?" Clementine asks AJ, getting a happy nod of agreement from him.

"Sure thing! Come on, Zara, you're gonna love Omars cooking, it always tastes good! Sometimes he even lets me help, and Omar usually _never_ let's anyone help when it comes to cooking-"

AJs eager voice became quieter and quieter as he got further from the room, bounding down the stairs with an amused Zara in tow. Everyone in the room stays quiet until AJs voice fades away completly, the two of them out of earshot.

"Okay, so... What the hell was that?"

Clementine sighs at Louis question, leaning against the desk beside her and crossing her arms as she thinks.

"She seemed almost... Afraid of you?" James noted, looking to the closed door that leads out to the stairwell.  
"Not just you, either."

"She was oddly, I don't know, cautious around you too, James. Even after I told her you were the one who rescued her."  
Clementine said with a concerned frown, lifting a hand to rub at her forehead.  
"Was she like that to you Violet? When she woke up?"

"Not like that" Violet insisted, shaking her head.  
"She was a bit defensive when I moved too quickly but she didn't jolt away from me like she did with Louis. The way she reacted, I mean..."

Violet trails off, a look of anger on her face as she thinks.

"Who the fuck did that shit to her? Gave her all those scars and cuts and bruises? What the fuck did they do to make her so scared?"

"I don't know..." Clementine admitted quietly, unable to meet Violets angered gaze.  
"If we ask her now, I don't think we'll get any answers out of her. None that are honest, anyway. I know firsthand that you don't tend to want to share your darkest memories with people you've just met."

"What do you want to do then?" Louis asked, copying Clementines stance and leaning against the desk.  
"Have you decided whether to let her stay?"

"We still don't know much about her. But maybe we can change that over the next few days while she heals up. If she proves to be capable while we're out on this mission, proves to be trustworthy? Then yes, so long as everyone else agrees to it, I say we let her stay."


	6. Chapter 6

Luck seemed to be on their side, as the constant blizzards that had been hitting them for the past few weeks appeared to have ceased. The temperature had warmed ever so slightly, turning the snow to rain and melting most of the snow that had settled on the ground. Not wanting to risk the chance of the temperature lowering again and for another snow storm to hit, Clementine decided that now was the perfect time to head out to the mall James had pointed out.

They had already been walking for hours now, relying only on the map she had brought with them and the sun's position in the sky to point them in the right direction.

"Hey" Louis' voice comes from next to her, turning to see he had jogged up to her side  
"How's your leg doing?" Louis asked, glancing down worriedly at her fake leg.

"Twinging every now and then, but I'm okay" Clementine assured him, thankful for his concern.

"You sure you don't want me to carry the backpack for a bit?"

"Nah, I'm good" Clementine told him, though she'd be lying if she said the offer wasnt tempting. The straps were definitely beginning to dig into her shoulders.

She glanced up at the sky, noting how the sun was getting lower and lower at a faster rate. It wouldn't be long before dusk, and travelling in the dark would be both pointless and dangerous.

"Besides, we'll be setting up camp soon. I'll be fine till then" She reassures him

"You sure?"

"I'm sure. Thank you, though." She tells him gratefully, placing a hand on his arm.

The touch immedietly brings a smile to his face, one that she returns. She drags her hand lightly down the surface of his arm as she lowers her hand, fingers tangling in his own and grasping their hands together tight, swinging their arms gently as they walk side by side.

The sound of wet leaves being stepped on make her jump slightly, turning to see Zara on her other side. She had almost forgotten that Zara was with them, the girl keeping quiet and mostly to herself the whole walk, only really speaking when addressed or to point out anything interesting, or potentially dangerous.

"You doing okay?" Clementine checked up on her, noticing Zaras somewhat sluggish movements.

"A little sore." Zara admitted, softly brushing at the gauze wrapped around her arms.  
"Guess I never realised how much walking can take out of you. Well, when covered in bruises, anyway"

"You haven't done much walking before? In the apocalypse? How?"

"Me and my family fell into a group not too long after it all started. I was too young to really do anything, so I spent most of my time in the camp. Not much walking _to_ do."

"This must be quiet the chance of pace, huh?"

"Thats one way of putting it..." Zara agreed with a light chuckle

"Hey, so... I just wanted to say sorry for not really being around to talk to you these past few days, leaving you to get used to everything and everyone on your own." Clementine apologised, feeling guilty for having spent most of her time up in Marlons office, sorting out preperations for the trip they were currently on.  
"I imagine it was a bit overwhelming, talking to everyone in the school and getting to know them. I know it was for me. Especially with this guy over here." Clementine finished her statement with a teasing smile, jabbing her thumb in Louis' directions.

"I _can_ hear you, you know." Louis protested, although he was openly smiling at Clementines jab  
"It's not my fault I'm the only around here that can make your life fun."

"I think you're confusing 'fun' for 'difficult'."

"There's a difference?"

"Uh, that's okay" Zara accepted Clementines apology with a somewhat awkward chuckle at Clementines and Louis' banter.  
"Being the leader of a group must be exhausting, I'm not all that suprised I didn't really see much of you.

"Still, it wasn't right of me. But maybe now we can take the time to ask eachother a few questions, get to know eachother a bit better?" Clementine offered

"Sure" Zara agreed with a one arm shrug  
"What do you wanna know?"

"Hmm...well, let's start easy. How old are you?"

"Does anyone know how old they are anymore?" Zara quipped with a raised eyebrow.  
"If I was to guess? Around eighteen, maybe nineteen?"

"Hey, me too!" Louis exclaimed in excitement, raising a hand up for a fist bump.

The sudden movement causes Zara to flinch away once again, a response that seemed almost involuntary. Zaras face twists in agitation mere seconds after the flinch, annoyed at herself for being unable to stop herself from flinching away.

"Shit, sorry! I forgot" Louis is quick to apologise, also looking annoyed with himself.

He's about to lower his arm back down when Zara suprises both him and Clementine by giving him the fist bump he had been waiting for, showing no signs of hesitancy as she had previously.

"That makes us official age buddies" Louis declared, delighted to have gotten his fist bump.

"Are you two not, uh, 'age buddies'" Zara questions, pointing between the two of them.

"No, we're fu-"

Clementine slaps a hand over Louis' mouth, quickly and efficiently quieting him. Truth be told though, the glare she gave him was just as efficient at shutting him up.

"You finish that sentence, we are over" She warns him, dropping her hand from his mouth.

"You wouldn't!"

"Oh, I would."

Zara watched the two interact, slightly baffled by how quick the conversation had been steered off course. On the other hand, she'd be lying if she said it wasn't entertaining to listen to.

"Fine, I can see when my company is not wanted" Louis said in mock offense

"I'll go find someone who _does_ appreciate my jokes" Louis continued, pointing to AJ who was walking not too far ahead of them.  
"You _sure_ you're good?"

Louis was indicating at the backpack once more, though she knew Louis enough to know what he was asking, seeing the way his eyes shifted over to Zara

_Are you okay with her?_

"Yeah, I'm good. You go check on AJ"

"You got it boss" Louis says with a smile, knocking his shoulder lightly into hers before jogging off towards AJ.

"You can tell me to fuck off if I'm being too invasive, but how long have you two been a thing?" Zara asked once Louis was out of earshot

"Little over a year now" Clementine answered, a light smile on her face at the reminder.  
"We got together not long after I joined the group, a few weeks maybe?"

"I find that hard to believe"

"Huh?"

"Oh, I don't mean that in a bad way" Zara is quick to retreat  
"It's just that seeing you two together... Its like you've known him for a long time"

"It's hard to find friends in this world. Even harder to find love. I suppose that when we found it, we hung on tight and didnt want to hold back.  
Sometimes it feels like I _have_ known him my whole life. Looking back, it feels weird to remember that he wasn't there with me. It feels like... Like we've somehow compressed a life long friendship down into a year."

They both turn their attention forward, to where Louis and AJ are walking ahead, the two of them wrapped up in their own conversation.

"You looking forward to seeing the mall?" Louis asks AJ as they walk.

"Yeah, I think so! I've never seen one before"

"I'm sure you'll love it, little dude. Even in the dishelved state it's probably in now"

"What was it like before?"

"Like most public places. Overcrowded, loud. Couldn't go more than a few steps without bumping into people. Every shop ridiculously overpriced. Y'know, the glitz and glam of modern life."

Clementine smiles fondly as she listens to the two of them talk. Louis leans down to listen to something AJ said, quickly straightening back up and reaching for AJ, picking the young boy up and putting him on his shoulders, sending AJ into a fit of giggles.

"He seems like a nice guy" Zara notes from next to her.

"Yeah. Yeah, he is" Clementine happily agrees  
"Come on, we should start looking for a place to set up camp."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The problem with setting up camp was always the decision as to whether to make a fire. In the summer months, it was an easy decision. Whilst the nights did cool down drastically, it was nothing too unbearable, so long as you had the right clothing and supplies. Keeping a fire alight at night would serve as a marker to anyone lurking nearby, the bright light in the night practically screaming 'Hey, there's people right over here!'

However, it was not summer. They were in the tail end of winter, and going all night in the freezing cold without a fire would do nothing but sign their death warrant. While they hadn't seen any signs of other people in the area while they were walking, it never hurt to be too cautious. They would have to take turns being on watch, ensuring everyone in the group got some sleep whilst also making sure they weren't  defenceless to a surprise attack, either from raiders, walkers or God knows what else.

"Alright" Louis huffed, dropping the pile of logs in his arms onto the floor.  
"That should be enough to keep the fire fire fed all night. ' _Should_ ' being the key word here. If you wanted a fire expert, Aasims your guy. Not me."

Louis takes a seat on the ground next to Clementine, resting an arm on his bent leg as he gets into a more comfortable position.

"What now?" AJ asks, looking around to everyone sat around the campfire.

"You should probably be getting some sleep, AJ. Lots more walking to do tomorrow, both to the mall and making our way back to the school" Clementine replied

"But I'm not tired yet" AJ whined, a pout immediately forming on his face at the thought of having to go to sleep so soon.

"Well, what do you want to do?"

"I have a suggestion" Louis leaned forward, putting his hand into his jacket and pulling out his pack of cards.

"Did you really bring those with you?" Clementine groaned, looking down at the cards in mild disdain.

"I wanna play a game!" AJ brightened up, shuffling closer to Louis.

"See? _Some_ people here enjoy having fun. You've gotta pick up the slack here Clem, otherwise I might just have to revoke your Team Fun Membership" Louis teased, pulling Clementine into his chest for her to lean against.  
"If you're not careful, we'll have to replace you with Zara. Isn't that right, Zara?"

"I literally have no clue what you guys are talking about" Zara replied with a laugh  
"But I'm up for a game. Any idea of what kind?"

"I think it's only fair we give you the same treatment Clem here got when she first showed up" Louis answered, giving Clementine a squeeze, receiving a light jab in the ribs in return.  
"I call...War!"

"War? That's a bit of a simple game, isn't it? Where does the 'treatment' part come into it?"

"If any of us win" Louis starts, pointing to himself, Clementine and AJ.  
"We get to ask you question. If you win, you get to ask us a question"

"Ah, I see" Zara replied, absentmindedly scratching at the bandages on her arm  
"Sounds... Fun? Alright, I'll give it a shot."

Louis finishes shuffling the cards, leaning over to hand Zara her pile before splitting the rest between himself, Clementine and AJ. They lift the top card from their decks, revealing Zara to be the winner of the round.

"Beginners luck?" Zara jokingly asks with a small chuckle  
"Okay, um... How long have you guys been here? At the school, I mean."

"I was at the school a bit over a year before the dead came back to quite literally bite us in the ass." Louis answered.  
"It's different for a lot of the kids here. Most of the kids here came to the school before me, so they've been there longer. Violet came to the school around the same time as me, so I made it my mission to befriend her as soon as possible. Even if she kept trying to reject my friendship."

"Wow... You've all known eachother for a while then?"

"A lot of the close friends I have in the school now weren't always close friends. There were so many people in the school back then, y'know? So I had other friends. You kind of get forced into friendships when there's only a handful of you left.  
Other than... Well, I suppose Marlon doesn't count anymore now... Other than him, Violets probably the one I've known the longest. Around... Yeah, wow, around ten years now."

"Marlon? Why wouldn't he count? Have I not met him yet?"

"No... No you haven't. And you won't. He's uh... He's dead"

"Oh. I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Its okay. It's another question for another win, ey?"

Zara gives Louis a sympathetic smile, watching as Louis' down mood seems to brighten slightly when Clementine places a comforting hand on his arm that was wrapped around her. Feeling like she's intruding in a private moment, she turns her gaze down to the cards in her hands and flips the top card from the deck.

"I win! I think?" AJs tone turned from excited to confused, glancing at everyone's cards.

"Sure did, bud" Louis confirmed for him  
"You got a question ready?"

"Oh, right. Um..." AJ paused to think, tapping his finger against his chin.  
"Where in the world would you most want to be?"

"Assuming walkers are still around?" Zara asked, receiving a nod from AJ  
"First instinct is to say an island with no people."

"Smart. No humans, no walkers. No humans, no raiders. No humans, no threats." Clementine says appreciatively.

"Exactly. But no humans also means no company. Less likely to find food."

"Not smart" Louis comments.

"I'd probably just keep heading north. Stay on the continent, but keeping heading up. Into colder lands."

"You'd want to live in a place where its this kind of weather all the time?" Louis questions in disbelief.

"I mean, yeah it'd suck, but you know who else hates the cold weather?"

"Walkers" Clementine answers

"Yup. They're still there, but they're even slower than usual, which makes it easier to escape groups of them. Plus your response?" Zara directs the last part of her sentence towards Louis  
"Is the same kind of response most people have. Hopefully, that would mean there are less people north, too. Less threats. Not none, but less."

AJ seems satisfied with the answer, as he begins to draw the top card from his pile, encouraging the others to do the same.

"I was waiting for my card skills to kick into action." Louis declared, waving around the king of hearts for all to see.  
"I'll give you an easier question. Now, I'm sure you've seen the incredibly beautiful grand piano sitting in our music room, perhaps heard it being played none other than by the talented-"

"Louis, you're supposed to be asking her a question. Not showing off." Clementine interrupted with a tone that indicted this was something she had gotten used to.

"Fine, fine." Louis caved with a sigh.  
"The point I was _t_ _rying_  to make is that I'm on the only one around here with some musical talent. So, question is, do _you_  have any musical abilities that could change that?"

"Wait, that's your piano?" Zara asked, eyes alight with excitement.  
"I saw it, but I didn't know if anyone played it. I always wanted to learn how to play when I was younger. Dad said we couldn't really fit one in our house, though."

"You never got to learn, then?" Clementine asked.

"Not piano, no. On my seventh birthday, my dad suprised me with a guitar and some 'teach yourself' books. Obviously it's no piano, but I was just so happy at at the thought of being able to play an instrument"

"Guitar player, huh? Any good?" Louis asked

"As good as an easily distracted seven year old kid can be." Zara answered.  
"I never really devoted myself to it. Maybe with lessons, it would be a different story. But... That was a long time ago. Who knows how well I could play now."

AJ yawns from next to Clementine, something that Clementine is quick to pick up on.

"Come on, kiddo. That's been your third yawn in about two minutes. You can't say you're not tired now."

"Are you going to bed too?" AJ asks, sleepily rubbing at his eyes

"I can't, kiddo. I'm on first watch. I'll head to sleep soon, though. Okay?"

"Don't worry, bud. I'm pretty beat myself, Im gonna be heading to bed too." Louis assured AJ, which seems to work well as AJ begins to stand, moving over to the rucksack to pull out some blankets.

"Thank you" Clementine expresses her gratitude, looking to Louis in affection.

"No problem. Don't you stay up all night on watch, alright? Wake me up when it's my turn." Louis insists, leaning forward to give her a quick kiss on her forehead before standing to head over to AJ.

"You heading to bed?" Clementine asks Zara, shuffling into a more comfortable position now she didn't have Louis to lean on.

"Nah. Not yet. I had gotten used to staying up most nights, so I find it kinda hard to get to sleep."

"Guess that means you're joining me on watch?"

"Girls night" Zara joked, getting a light laugh out of Clementine.

"Not the kind of girls night in teen magazines"

"Eh, they never looked much fun anyway"

The night dragged on slowly, nothing but the sound of the fire crackling as they both stated out into the endless stretch of darkness around them, only able to make out the few trees around them from the glow of the campfire. They were both silent, not wanting to talk so that Louis and AJ could fall asleep. Though it wasn't an awkward silence. It was actually quite comfortable, knowing they weren't the only one up and awake.

Zara glances over to the sleeping members of the group, making sure they were fast asleep before leaning closer to Clementine to talk.

"Why do I get the feeling you're not gonna wake him up for watch?" Zara asks with a knowing smile

"Wow, only a few days here and you've already got me worked out" Clementine responds with her own smile.  
"Louis didn't get much sleep last night. He needs this."

"Why didn't he get much sleep?"

"Same as everyone. Nightmares always keep him awake, and they come so often. He tries to cover it up, but, I can see right through him. He's exhausted."

"Aren't you?"

"Can't remember a time I _wasn't_  exhausted" Clementine huffed, poking at the burning logs in the fire with a stick  
"Doesn't matter. There's uh... There's something I wanted to ask you. Back at the game."

"Oh. Well... Why didn't you ask it?"

"First of all, I didn't win a round" Clementine jokes, trying to lighten the mood

"And secondly... I thought it best only to ask when it's just us. Especially not with Louis."

"Okay..."

"I already know this is going to be a difficult question for you to answer. And I wish I didn't have to ask it. But I _do_. Because I don't want to take a chance with his safety. With my _familys_ safety." Clementine implored, placing the stick in her hand down on the ground and turning to face Zara.

"Back in the office, when you first came to talk to me. When Louis tried talking to you, you reacted very... Negatively. Like you were desperate to get away from him. At first I thought maybe you were still a bit off from your injuries, maybe you didn't like the sudden movement. Something like that."

Clementine glanced over her shoulder, checking that Louis was still fast asleep. When she was sure he was, she turns back to Zara, staring deep into her eyes that seemed hesitant to meet her own.

"But then you started being hesitant to James, not wanting to get too close to him. I haven't really had a chance to see you talk to the others, but the same thing happened _a_ _gain_  with Louis just earlier today. The second he did something you weren't expecting, you went into fight or flight. Like you were ready for an attack. "

Zara was refusing to meet Clementines gaze, instead choosing to stare into the flames of the fire, the flickering light reflected in the teary sheen of her eyes.

"I know this is going to bring up painful memories. I'm more than used to having to bring those back up, and the irritation I felt when people force me to bring them back up. But they did it for a reason, they needed to know, and now I need to know; Why? What happened to you?"

"Suppose I should start from the beginning" Zara begun, still staring into the fire, looking but not really seeing.

"When shit went down, me and my family were some of the idiots who decided we would be safest staying put at our homes. Of course, I was about nine years old so I blindly followed my parents instructions. It's funny, at that age it seems impossible for your parents to do anything wrong, like they always knew what to do. Now I'm older, I realise they didn't actually know shit..."

"I hear that..." Clementine mumbled in agreement

"I can remember my mom telling me 'Don't worry honey, the good guys will come and clear this whole mess up!' We were all so sure the military would swoop in and save the day. Maybe if they were more prepared, knew more about the walkers, who knows? Maybe they might have done it. They didn't, though. And we stayed locked up in our house for three months."

"Three months? What made you leave after that long?"

"Mom and Dad started arguing constantly about our safety. We were running out of food and water, and the walkers were coming by more and more frequently. It started out as just a few walkers every night. Soon it was ten. Then twenty. Then more. Herds passing by, leaving behind large groups of the fuckers that just... Hung about.  
Dad wanted us to move somewhere else, find more supplies. Mom didn't like that idea, was too scared of stepping outside the house."

"Your dad was right, but I can understand where you're mom is coming from. I wasn't all too happy to leave my house, but I'm glad I did."

"I didn't know who to side with. Dad begged my mom to sleep on it, and she finally agreed. That night, we started to hear something outside that wasn't walkers. It was screaming... A child screaming... I didn't know it then, but I know now that the sound accompanying the screaming was the sound of that kid being torn apart. I wish I had known it then, because then I could of stopped her. Stopped mom from rushing out that front door to help. There were so many of them, just waiting by the front door. Walkers move slow, but when they're right in front of you? It seems like she had only just opened that door when they bit into her face."

Zara pauses, taking a moment to swallow around the painful lump in her throat before she continues.

"I'll never be able to forget her screams. They're so clear in my mind, yet they were so short. She barely had time to let out a lungful before they dragged her away. Dad was... He was never quite the same after that."

"Im sorry" Clementine whispered, though she knows her apology doesn't mean anything. Nothing ever helps soothe the pain of losing a loved one.

"Thank you" Zara responds anyway, a thankful smile on her face that quickly vanishes  
"After that, we wandered. Followed the road ahead of us, for as long as we could. We couldn't have been out there for more than a month before we came across this group. They weren't all too keen at letting us in at first, seemed ready to turn us away at the gates. My dad was begging them, saying he would do anything to let us in. And just like that, the gates opened."

"Anything? I don't like the sound of that"

"Again, I was only nine. I didn't understand what was happening, not really. Clementine, I... My father was a good man. He loved me and my mom more than anything in this world. He went to speak to the leader in private, and when he came back he told me they would let us stay. Of course, he didn't tell me the whole story. There was a price to this.  
I was only a kid, I wasn't much use to the group. Other than being able to do a few chores around the camp, I was just another mouth to feed. The leader could see this, so he made sure my dad picked up the slack for me. My dad was forced to join his team, an army of sorts, really. I didn't think much of it, dad only told me he was a guard and that's what I believed. Until one day he came home with his clothes covered in blood. Not all of it was his."

"Not all of it... What do you mean?"

"My dad wasn't a guard. He had become a raider. This group we were in... They weren't who I thought they were. There was a reason they were thriving so well, and that's because they were attacking other communities and stealing their resources for themselves. My dad knew all this, and he didn't tell me. Like I said, my father was a good man. A good man that was forced to do bad things in order to protect the ones he loved. To protect... Me.  
Having to do what he did? God, it was _killing_  him. I could see it in his eyes, every night he came to say good night. He was slowly losing himself. And yet, he kept doing it. Because he knew it would keep me safe. And it did. Until... "

Zara paused, jaw clenching painfully as she builds up the courage to continue her story. She closes her eyes in an attempt to force away the oncoming tears she could feel burning just under her eyes, fighting against the painful clench of her throat.

"You know how I said there wasn't much I could do around the camp? That I was useless?" Zara questioned, turning away from the fire to look at Clementine. Clementine nods slowly, waiting for her to continue.

"As I started to get older, some of the men of the group they... They started to realise they could get a different kind of use out of me."

Clementine felt her stomach drop, an immediate and intense wave of nausea hitting her as she realised what Zara was trying to say. It was such a horrifying concept, one that she had hoped would never have to go through herself.

"I tried _so_  hard to fight them off the first time it happened. I screamed, I cried, I hit. It didn't matter. They... They did what they did. I felt... Defiled. Like I could never be myself again. I was stupid enough to think, no, to hope that it would be the only time it happened.  
He came back. Then so did another. And another. And another. Until I could no longer keep count, could no longer remember the faces.  
Worst of all? I stopped fighting. I gave up. Because in my mind, my dad had to go through the same kind of awful shit everyday to keep me alive. If he could suffer through that, then surely I could suffer through this. I was sure that bringing it up would only stir up trouble."

"Christ, Zara. I'm... I don't even know what to say."

"I don't blame you. I wouldn't know either."

"Is that..." Clementine starts, realisation dawning on her as she glances over at Louis' sleeping form  
"Is _t_ _hat_  why? Why you flinch away from Louis? From James"

"I know they're not like that" Zara begins quickly  
"I still don't know much about James, or Aasim, or Omar but I know a bit about Louis, and I _know_  he would never do anything like that. I still can't stop myself, though. Everytime I see them, I... Its all I can think about."

"How the hell did you get away from it all?"

"I never would have myself. Dad he... He found out for himself. He has returned from a raid early and walked in on one of them... Doing what they were doing to me. And this guy, this _fucking asshole,_ he has the audicity to tell my dad to get out and let him finish his business. It might have been the hardest I've ever seen my dad hit someone. Guy was out instantly."

"Good." Clementine spat angrily, not feeling guilty in the slightest for wishing harm to this guy.

"Glad we're on the same page." Zara agreed.  
"My dad dragged this dicks unconscious ass all the way up the leaders office. Explained what happened, what _had_  been happening. I didn't have the time or the courage to tell him that the leader was one of the men who had done this to me.  
Dad was told he would be punished for attacking a member of the group, or face being exiled. It was the calmest I had ever seen my dad. He simply accepted his punishment for whatever it may be, and walked out of there."

"He just... Let it go? Then, how..."

"That night, he walked right into the leaders room and slit his throat. Walked right back out, got me, some supplies and we hightailed it out of there.  
We lived out on the road for about a year. And we promised eachother to _never_ join another group. It would just be me and him, always."

"It didn't last, did it?" Clementine asked sadly

"We had stopped for the night, set up a small camp. Kind of like this one here." Zara says, nodding to the fire that was flickering in front of her.  
"I woke up and I thought that dad was had woken up for a drink and started choking on his water. Turns out he was choking on his blood."

Zara stops talking when her voice wavers, the memory too painful to speak of. She raises a shaky hand to her face, wiping away the tears that had collected in her eyes and taking a deep shuddering breath.

"They had found us. They didn't forget, and they sure as hell didn't forgive. They did exactly what my dad had done to their leader. Snuck in and slit his throat. Just like that, I was alone. And you know what they were doing, right after they did it? They were _laughing._ Laughing and smiling.  
In that moment, I was wishing they would do the same to me. To slit my throat and let it be over with. To let me _di_ _e._ They weren't going to let me off that easy though."

Zara lifts her arms up in front of her, peeling away at the gauze wrapped around her arms and pulling it down slightly, showing the still healing cuts.

"They took me wherever they went. Gave me the bare minimum of food and water, not enough for me not to feel like I was starving, but enough so that I wasn't dying. Whenever they felt like it, they'd head over to where they were keeping me chained up and would do what they want. Some nights they beat me to within inch of my life. Some nights the would take their knives and carve into my skin. Whatever it was they felt like doing. I should have been praying for some sort of miracle, but let's be honest. That's bullshit. All I could hope for was that one day they went too far, and I would die."

Clementine stared in shock and disgust at the still healing cuts. She knew it shouldn't shock her of the kinds of things that awful people could do, having seen plenty of it herself. And yet, in very story she heard from broken survivors like Zara never failed to remind her of how dangerous people really were.

"I thought that for a long time. Right up until the moment one of them got a little too close to me with his knife just... There, hanging in its sheath by his hip. I suddenly decided that no, I shouldnt have to deal with this shit. I decided that their lives were not more important than mine. So I grabbed that knife, and I shoved it into his eye. I shoved it in as far as I could, until he stopped moving. They hadn't been expecting me to fight back.  
All the others were fast asleep and in that moment, every fibre of my being wanted to take that knife and give them the same treatment. I was going to do it, too. Seconds away. But something stopped me. Something in me that didn't want to go down this road, because if I did? How am I any different from them?  
That's what I kept asking myself, all the time I was walking. What it is that makes people like you and me different from them. It ate away at me for days, until finally everything went dark. Next thing I know, I woke up to find someone picking me up."

Zara reached behind her to grab her bag, opening the top flap and pulling out something for Clementine to see.

"We didn't have many supplies of our own. There was only thing dad had, something he had taken from home." Zara explains, puimg the object out further and revealing an old instant camera.

"My mom bought my dad this camera on their first anniversary. He never really used it all that much, but it meant a lot to him. Especially after what happened to her.  
You know, most people were frantic to pack all the survival gear they could. Rations, bottles of clean water, warm clothes. And then heres my dad, trying to carefully pack this damn thing.  
I never thought much of it. But now... Now it's all I have of him. I take it everywhere I go, because then it's like he's still there, still protecting me."

Zara fiddles with the camera in her hands for a moment, examining it from different angles as if it was the first time she was looking at it, not the hundredth.

She gingerly places the camera back into the bag, now pulling out a knife that immedietly put Clementine on alert. She makes no moves with the knife, instead simply laying it on her palm and gazing down at it.

"This was his knife. The man I killed. This was the one I stabbed into his eye." Zara states, twirling the knife to hold the blade and offer the handle to Clementine. Clem carefully takes it, observing how the blade was similar in style to hers, almost military -esque.

"I understand why you're asking me these questions. Why you want to know. You want to know if I'm dangerous. If I've ever killed before. Well, now you know. I can't tell you if I'm dangerous, that's something only you can decide for yourself." Zara tells her as Clementine hands the knife back over to her examining the knife for a brief movement before sliding it back into her bag, then placing the bag gently down by her side.  
"Yes, I have killed someone before. But let's be real here, you don't survive as long as we have without having done so. You've killed before, otherwise you wouldn't be thinking of asking me this. Hell, I wouldn't be suprised if Louis has killed before, maybe even AJ.  
There's a difference though, isn't there? The thing that makes us different from the psychopaths out there? We don't do it, just because. We don't do it, because we enjoy it, because we feel the need to get ahead by any means necessary. Yes, we kill. But only when we have to.  
If you were in my position, if you had all those _t_ _hings_  done to you, and the person that had caused all that pain, all that suffering was standing in front of you, tell me. Would you not do what I did? Can you really say he didn't deserve what I did to him?"

"Honestly? I'm scared to think of what I would have done. I'm not sure if I would have held back as much as you did." Clementine admits, feeling guilt creep up at what she was saying.

"Look, I'm not expecting you to invite me into this" Zara states, indicating to Louis and AJ behind her.  
"There's only one group I have ever been in, and they were barely a group. They didn't care about eachother, not like you guys do. And that's something I've never seen before. You guys are different, I can see that.  
I promised my dad I would never join another group. That it wasn't worth it. But you guys? You _are._  
If at the end of all this, you decide you don't want me here, I promise you it's okay. That I completly understand why you decided not to. I'll still be forever thankful that you made the choice to take me in. That you saved my life."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Whoa...."

AJ breathed out the words in astonishment, gazing at the large structure that had appeared in the their line of sight after cresting the hill.

"There it is, AJ. Your first mall trip." Louis notes, looking down to AJ with an amused smile at the look of complete amazement on AJs face at the sight of the mall.

"It's huge!"

While the building wasn't big by most mall standards, it was undoubtedly the largest buildings AJ had come across, a potentially hidden paradise of all the supplies they could ever need nestled away in a rural part of Virginia.

They approach the mall at a steady pace, constantly checking their surroundings for any signs of other survivors as they get closer and closer. Abondened cars littered the parking lot, a few corpses leaning across the cars steering wheels.

"Whats the chance any of these work?" Louis questions as they stand by one of the cars, poking at one of the dead bodies with Chairles.

The corpse had clearly been there a long time; its clothes paled from being sunbeached, skin barely hanging to bone after years and years of decomposition.

A piece of crumpled paper slips onto the ground from Louis' poking, going unnoticed by everyone except for Zara. Louis had turned away, talking to AJ and Clem who had been distracted by Louis. Zara takes the small break in conversation to lean over and pick up the piece of paper, unfolding it to reveal a scribbled set of numbers.

"Even if they did, I can't drive anymore with this thing." Clementine replies somberly, sticking out her fake leg  
"Unless you suddenly learnt how to drive?"

"Pfft" Louis dismisses, waving his hand  
"Who needs to learn? I'll just pick it up as I go."

"Uh, I'd rather get back to the school alive." Clementine teased snarkily, heading towards the entrance to the mall

"Bold words from the person who crashed their car." Louis calls after her, swinging Chairles up to rest on his shoulder.

Zara refolds the piece of paper in a much neater fashion than the way it had originally been scrunched up, tucking it away in her pocket and following the others into the mall.

There are signs of decay the second they enter the mall; window displays shattered, colorful promotional sale posters now faded and peeling, most littering the floor. Leaves and other debris from outside had been blown in, a chill wind rushing throughout the whole building from the gaping hole in the ceiling as the material had given away after years of being battered by the harsh weather.

"Probably not the luxury you were thinking of" Louis directed to AJ, spinning around to take in the mall

"It's still really cool" AJ asserted, leaning down to pick up a torn poster from the ground.

"You said it, kiddo" Zara agreed, a similar look of wonderment on her face as she peered into some of the open shops.

"We've got a lot of ground to cover, and not much time." Clementine notes as she lifts a hand to touch the worn glass encasing the map of the mall.

"Alright, what's the plan?" Louis asks as he walks over to Clementine, who chews on her bottom lip as she thinks.

"I don't really like the idea, but... There's not much of a choice if we want to get back by tomorrow. We're going to have to split up, two teams of two. One covers the east side, the other the west" Clementine instructs, tracing a finger down the paths on the map.  
"Search any stores that seem like they might have something, _anything_  left."

"Anything we should keep an eye out for?" Zara asks from behind them

"Medical supplies are always top priority" Clementine answers, turning from the map to talk to Zara.  
"But honestly, just grab whatever seems useful. Even if we can't use it, we can always offer it for trade."

"Two groups of two... How do you wanna do this?" Louis asks

Clementine looks to each member of the group, all of them looking back at her as they patiently wait for new instructions.

"Louis, you go with AJ, see what you can find on the west side of the mall. Me and Zara will cover east. We'll spend three hours searching, then meet back here once we're done. Even if we don't search everything, we can always come back in the future."

"Guess I'll see you guys later then" Louis states, bringing Chairles back up to rest on his shoulder.  
"You ready to do some exploring, bud?" He excitedly asks AJ.

"Wait" Clementine stops him, grabbing ahold of his coat sleeve and forcing him to turn back to her as he turned to leave.  
"Keep an eye out, we might not be alone here. Look after him, okay? And look after yourself. Be careful."

Louis gives her a soft smile, leaning forward to place a kiss on her cheek as he usually did when she was worrying over him.

"Always"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Shattered glass crunches under Clementines feet as the two of them make their way down the malls dark and gloomy path, the abondened atmosphere adding to the tension they both felt, just waiting for someone or something to pop out at any moment.

"So, you crashed your car?" Zara asks somewhat teasingly, though holds back on the teasing tone, slightly fearful that Clementine would shoot her for the remark.

"Im gonna kill him... " Clementine muttered, cursing Louis for speaking so openly, shaking her head in exasperation.  
"Yes, I crashed my car"

"Wow... It sure would suck if that had been the last working car, huh?"

"I already hear this kind of stuff from Louis, don't tell me I've gotta hear it from you as well" Clementine teases her back, a smile on her face to show she hadn't taken any offence.

"How did you do it? What happened, I mean."

"It wasnt all too long ago it happened, in fact it's actually how the group found me. Me and AJ got into a bad situation, and were overrun by walkers. It was struggle to drive out of there, and some of them had managed to break inside. We were so distracted trying to fight them off that I hit a rock and then-"  
Clementine interrupted herself with a click of her fingers, driving the point home.  
"-Lights out."

"Jesus, that sounds bad..."

"It was, the car was completly wrecked. Had even flipped upside down."

The various window displays of the stores blur past as they walk, taking time to examine each store. Any shops that they would have no use for, they didnt even bother looking into. Anything else, they would take a quick look to assess the state of the store and see how much had been left.

"What do you bet they're all like this?" Zara asks dissapointingly, peering into the twentieth ransacked shop they had seen.

"As much as it sucks, they probably are" Clementine was reluctant to agree, though didn't want to lead both herself and Zara on false hope.  
"Considering how well hidden this place is, I'm suprised how much has been taken."

"It _has_ been nearly ten years. Plus, I'm sure a lot of people already knew about this place before the whole apocalypse thing started. Floods of people probably headed to places like these to stock up."

"Probably... Still, I'm not willing to give up just yet. There has to be _something_  of value left around here. I just hope Louis and AJ are having better luck..."

They exit the store, continuing their walk down the malls main lanes, keeping an eye out both for any potentially stocked stores and for any signs of danger.

"So... Can I ask you a question?" Zara asks cautiously, facing Clementine as she walks.

"Sure, shoot." Clementine responds, focusing on where she's walking.

"It's about Violet"

This gets Clementine to look away from her feet to Zara, eyebrows raised in suprise at the subject of the question

"What about her?"

"It's... I don't really know how to say it. Violet, she... She seems anti-social and also social at the same time. Its as if she _wants_  to talk to me, but also doesn't, at the same time. Sometimes she'll talk to me completly normal, the next second she seems to shut down. She doesn't start ignoring me but she's turns really... I don't know, Unresponsive? Responses kept to the bare minimum, like she wants to escape the conversation. Is it something I did?"

"No, it's not anything to do with you, exactly" Clementine told her, a feeling of sadness beginning to creep up.

"Is it... Is it to do with the bandage on her face? Is she... Blind? I'm always too nervous to ask, I don't want to upset her..."

"Violet is... Look, I don't really feel like this is something _I_  should tell you. Violet will tell you, when and _if_ she's ready to. I don't have the right to say exactly what happened, but..." Clementine trails off, running a hand over the top of her head and through her hair.

"Something bad happened. A shitty situation came up, and I had to make a hard choice, a choice that would have bad consequences no matter what. I made my choice and in the end, Violet lost her sight. And I lost her trust.  
I can assure you, Violet acted the same way to me when we first met. Quite frankly, she was rude, cold and somewhat hostile. But you know what? So was I, and I wasn't going to let that put me off."

"I guess it's kind of a reassurance that it's not _j_ _ust_  me..."

"No, it's not just you. Listen, there's something you need to know about Violet. She won't be willing to make friends with everyone. She needs to know she can  _trust_ you, that you'll always have her back. When I first met her, Louis told me that 'She'll grow on me.'"

"And did she?"

"While I get where Louis was trying to come from, it's not a case of Violet 'growing on you.' It's _you_ thats got to give _her_  a reason to give you a chance. For you to grow on her. And believe me, that's not easy. But if you do it, if you are willing to show her how much she means to you? She's absolutely worth it. She's one of the best friends you could ever have."

"Oh trust me, you don't have to tell me that. I can already tell she's worth it." Zara tells her, a light smile on her face at the assertion in Clementines voice.  
"Ive heard for myself just how loyal she is to you. She really believes in you, y'know? That you can lead this group."

"Im not too sure about that" Clementine denied dejectedly.  
"Even though she's told me she forgives me, I don't think she _truly_  has. And I don't blame her in the slightest. So much shit wouldnt have happened if it wasn't for me, and I-"

"Clem, wait" Zara stops Clementine mid sentence, shooting out an arm to stop Clementine from stepping any further forward. Clementine comes to an arubt halt, frowning over at Zara in confusion as to why they had to stop walking.

"That the kind of thing we're looking for?" Zara asks, pointing to a store with a faded sign displaying the name: 'Johnsons Pharmacy'

"That's _exactly_ what we're looking for." Clementine affirmed, quickly darting over to store front.

This store was different from the others in the mall. Instead of shattered windows and empty stock, a rusty segregated metal roll down gate had been pulled down, with an industrial looking combination lock keeping the store shut to outsiders.

"That's not great." Zara stated, stepping next to Clementines side, the two of them staring down at the lock.

"No, this is a good sign." Clementine tells her, looking around at the ground for something to use on the lock.  
"Sure, it makes it more difficult for us. But the lock is _still_  here. And it looks like it's been here for a while now. If this was locked up sometime near the beginning?"

"Then there's a whole store of untouched supplies in there" Zara finished for her, looking from the rolling gate to Clementine who was still searching the floor.  
"Uh, what are you doing?"

"I'm looking for something we can-" Clementine starts her explanation, but stops when she spots a loose brick sitting nearby, swiftly heading over and picking it up.  
"This should do"

"And what are you planning on doing with-"

Clementine interrupts her by bringing the brick down hard on the lock, the resulting metal clang from the impact echoing down the long stretch of lanes either side of them.

"-Oh, I see"

Clementine repeats the same action, crouched down by the gate and bringing the brick down on the lock again and again, waiting for the old metal to give way to the force of the hits and snap off.

"Well... Fuck." Clementine stopped her attacks, dropping the brick to her side leaning back on her heels to observe the seemingly undamaged lock.  
"This worked the last time"

"Uh, the last time?" Zara asked her worryingly.

"It's a long story" Clementine brushed her question off, picking the brick back up and getting ready to continue her attacks  
"I'll save it for a better time."

"Wait!" Zara stopped her once more, Clementine listening and pausing her attack, holding the brick above her head.

"What?"

"I found this outside, it came off one of the bodies in the car" Zara explains as she pulls the folded piece of paper out of her pocket, handing it over to Clementine who drops the brick to take it.  
"It's a long shot, but their clothes kind of looked familiar, the kind you'd see on a doctor or other medical worker. Maybe those numbers..."

Clementine is way ahead of Zara, already sliding her thumb down the wheel of numbers to enter the combination on the lock from the paper. She holds her breath as she enters the last number, releasing that same breath in complete surprise when she hears the sound of the lock disengaging, the entire lock coming loose and dropping into her hand.

She pockets the lock for potential future use, grabbing the bottom of the rolling gate and struggling to push it up. Zara is quick to offer her assistance, bending down and pushing the gate upwards, wincing slightly at the screech of the metal as the shutters were forced up and open.

"Holy shit..." Zara exclaims once they step back from the now open gate, gazing at the endless rows of pills and other supplies that stretched out in front of them.

"Well, we were due for some luck at some point. I guess today is that day"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Should I take it as a bad sign that Clem didn't want to group with me?" Louis asked AJ as he swung Chairles lazily back and forth, matching his strides

"I don't think so?" AJ replied, not having a clue as to what Louis was asking, let alone how to answer.

"Yeah, you're probably right." Louis said as he nodded repeatedly, sounding like he needed some reassurance.  
"But... What if she's annoyed with me? I know I can get on people's nerves sometimes..."

"Clem doesn't find you annoying"

"How do you know?"

"Coz she'd tell you if she did"

"Oh. Right, of course. I'm probably just overreacting, aren't I?"

"Yep" AJ replied happily, smiling up at Louis.

"Damn, here I am, receiving assurances from a six year old"

"I'm seven!" AJ protested angrily, as if the one year made a difference.

"My mistake, seven." Louis corrected sarcastically, flipping Chairles around in his hands distractedly as he looked at the abundance of stores around them.

"Holy-"

"You're gonna say a bad word" AJ stopped Louis before he could say his admittedly bad word.

"-Shoot" Louis finished, eager to get to the thing he was trying to say.  
"Tell me AJ, what does that look like to you?"

AJ frowns, squinting in concentration as he tries to read the sign above one of the stores Louis was pointing to.

"It's a... A m--Mu... A music... Store?"

"Hell yeah it is!" Louis confirmed giddily, striding over to the open doors.

"Should we go in there?" AJs worried voice stopped Louis, who paused in his tracks and turned to see AJ wasn't following him.  
"I don't see what could be in there that we could use"

"Don't see what-" Louis spluttered, head darting from AJ to the inside of the store.  
"Think of all the instruments hidden away in there, just waiting to be taken to a loving home!"

"But your piano is huge! How are we going to being another piano back home?"

Louis breaks up into a fit of giggles at the innocence of AJs question, picturing all of them trying to drag a full sized grand piano all the way down the road back to the school.

"Not a piano" Louis assures him with a shake of his head once his laughter begins to die off.  
"Not just that. I bet there are hundreds of music books in there, countless new songs to be learnt. Maybe some more beginners book, I could maybe start teaching you how to play."

"Really?" AJ asks, part in excitement and part in disbelief.  
"You could teach me?"

"Of course I can! I'm the worst possible student of piano, and _I_ taught _myself_ , so that should prove anyone can learn. Like I said before, you're a natural at playing, you can do this no problem."

"...Okay..." AJ relents, glancing guiltily at the rows of other stores next to them.  
"But not for too long"

"Atta boy" Louis praised AJ with a grin, stepping closer to the store once again.

"Shouldnt we check for monsters?" AJ asks Louis as they take their first step into the dark store.

"Way ahead of ya, kiddo" Louis replied confidently, leaning closer to the door frame and removing Chairles from his coat pocket.

He pauses for a moment, listening to the stifling silence of the room before smashing Chairles against the metal frame of the door. The nails in the bat catch aginst the frame, creating a sound of metal clangs that could be heard from within the store.

"What are you doing?" AJ hissed quietly at Louis, alarmed by how loud he was being.

Louis brings a finger to his lips, instructing AJ to be quiet who obeys the command, watching Louis as he pauses to listen after he stops hitting the frame. The last clangs echo around the store and die off, plunging the room back into silence.

"Walkers can be sneaky when they want to be" Louis tells AJ, keeping Chairles in his hands just in case.  
"But it's not because they're smart. They're just waiting for something to let them know dinner is nearby. So I rung the dinner bell for them."

"But... Isn't that just going to attract walkers?"

_"Exactly._  I made all that noise, so why aren't walkers chowing on us right now?"

"Because...because there aren't any?"

"Bingo" Louis replied, tucking Chairles back into his coat now enough time had passed.  
"If there are any, they would have come out, and we would have dealt with them."

"What if there were too many? What then?"

"Uh... Run?"

AJ gives Louis an exasperated look at the uncertainty in his tone, turning away from him and making his way into the store to peruse the aisles.

"Damn, haven't seen the 'I'm not angry, just disappointed' look in a while." Louis muttered to himself, also stepping into the store.

They both spend a few minutes making their way down the separate aisles, stopping to get a closer look at whatever had caught their attention. Like most of the stores, a lot of the contents of the store had been taken or was strewn across the floor of the shop, people likely looking for something useful to use in the impending apocalypse.

"Would you look at that" Louis called for AJs attention, gazing appreciatively at a classic guitar hung up on one of the display walls behind the cash registers.

"Didn't Zara say she used to play guitar?" AJ recalled as Louis climbed up on the counters to pull the guitar from the hooks that were holding it in place.

"That she did, AJ. Perhaps we should bring it home with us, would make for a nice welcoming gift."

"Does that mean she's staying?"

"As far as I'm aware, yup." Louis confirmed, holding the guitar by its neck and letting it rest by his side.  
"So long as everyone else wants her to stay, that is."

"Cool. I like her, I think?"

"You think?" Louis asks as he jumps deok from the counter, amused by the confusion in AJs tone.

"I don't really know much about her" AJ replies with a shrug of his shoulders  
"But she seems nice. She would come sit with me when I would draw, and she even showed me her camera."

"Her camera?"

"Yeah, it's really cool! She took a picture of me with it and the camera just _made_  the picture appear on a bit of paper."

"Like a photo?"

"Yeah, like that!"

"Huh" Louis responded, trying to recall ever seeing Zara with a camera. She seemed like a secretive person to him, so it wasn't all too suprising there was something she had that she wasn't too willing to share with everyone.

"Not just that, too." AJ begins  
"She has this super cool knife, too. Kind of like Clems"

"Oh yeah? Is she as good as Clem with it?"

"No one's as good as Clem" AJ is quick to defend his closest friend  
"Buuuuuuut, she's pretty damn close. I watched her help take out some monsters by the gate, she was super quick, zooming around the trees. She's good with them."

"Well, if she's got your vote, shes got my vote too. Wanna give me some ideas on how we're gonna lug this home? I'm sure there'll be a carry case around her somewhere..."

"I think I saw some cases over there" AJ supplied, pointing to the back of the shop.

"Sweet, that'll make this easier. Hey, do you reckon Clementine will be pissed at me for taking this back?"

"Maybe, maybe not." AJ responded unhelpfully

"She'll probably make you carry it the whole way back though" AJ added with a knowing grin.

"Oh, I have no doubt about-"

The sound of a gunshot echoing from somewhere within the mall makes them freeze, conversation coming to an arubt halt and staring wide eyed at one another. The sound was loud yet not loug enough to have come from there side of the mall. No, it was definitely from other side. Where Clementine and Zara was.

"Louis?" AJ asks him fearfully, unsure what to do.

The guitar slips out of his hands and hits the floor, a familiar numbing sensation spreading through his body as fear begins to take over at the thought of Clementine being on the receiving end of the shot.

"Stay behind me" Louis finally manages to get out an instruction, grabbing Chairles from his pocket and sprinting out of the store and in the direction of the gunshot, praying to any Gods that were listening that he wasn't too late.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Clementine pulls a prescription box off the shelf, turning it in her hands to read the label. She shucks her rucksack off her shoulder, pulling the already open zipper even further open to chuck the box inside before partly closing the zipper and pushing the bag back up by her shoulders.

She shifts slightly down the aisle, scanning the shelfs for anything new, anything they don't have back at home or at least don't have in quantities she would feel comfortable with. She can hear the quiet sounds of Zara on the other side of the store, only just able to make out the sounds of her footsteps due to the distance between them, the pharmacy revealing to be larger than they could ever have thought before stepping inside.

A counter of pill bottles catches her attention, unsure as to what their contents were. She stops walking down the aisle, reaching out a hand to pick up the bottle, pulling it closer for a better look.

A hand roughly grabs her shoulder, violently spinning her round and slamming her backwards, the hard edges of the shelves digging into her back. The smooth surface of the plastic bottle makes the pills slip from her hands, the lid popping from the force of the drop and spilling the contents of the bottle all over the floor, the pills rattling across the floor.

The man pinning her to the shelf looks dishelveled, eyes wide and wild as he sneers down at her, putting extra pressure on her shoulders and pushing her further into the counters behind her. Her hand instinctively goes to the gun in her pocket, pulling it out and ready to pull the trigger. A moment of hesitation is all the man needs to smack the gun out of her hands, the pistol skidding across the floor and out of sight.

She moves her hand once again, this time to the knife stowed away in her trouser pockets. She stops however when she feels the press of a knife against her throat, hands stilling just over her own knife.

"Don't" The man snarls, glaring down at her with a look of detest.   
"You have some nerve. Did you really think I wouldn't recognise you, that I wouldn't remember?!"

"What? I don't know what-" Clementine tries to say, but the man cuts her off by pressing the knife harder against her throat.

"How could you do it? Hmm? How could you _l_ _ive_ with yourself after what you all did. You _slaughtered_ her, like she was a damn animal on a farm! She was _everything_  to me."

"I--"

"-You killed  _all_  of them. Didn't even blink an eye, just disposed of them. And then? You _took_  him from me. You took my boy." The man said tearfully

Clementine didn't know what to say, or what to do. This man was so clearly on egde, spewing about things she had no idea about. For a brief moment, she wonders if maybe, just maybe, this man could be a member of the Delta. After all, Lilly and her group was only a small part of the entire group. Lilly never did reveal where exactly the Delta was, of how close it and its members could be to the school.

Still, it didn't entirely make sense. While yes, she supposed there's was a chance one of the women on the boat may be the person he was accusing her of killing, what exactly was he talking about with this boy? This man was still quite young himself, so any child he potentially had couldn't be all that old himself, still a child most likely. There were definitely no children on that boat, none that they had harmed or taken, so what was this man talking about?"

"Your boy? What do you mean? I promise you, we didn't-"

"You promise?!" The man spits, a sheen of unstabless gleaming in his eyes.  
"Your _promise_  means nothing to me. You and your group of... Of _psychopaths._ I've seen a lot of bad shit out here, but all of you? Sometimes I'm not even sure you're human."

"I'm sorry for whatever happened to you, okay?" Clementine attempts to defuse the situation, placing a cautious hand on the man's arm that was still holding the knife to her throat.  
"But you've got the wrong people"

"No?" The man asks with a sarcastic laugh.   
"No, I know I've got the right people. You took all I had from me, and then? You let me live. Because you knew it was a much worse fate than killing me. But that?"

Clementine feels the cold bite of the knifes steel dig into her throat, desperately trying to pull her head away from what could easily be her impending death. Warm trickles of blood slide down her skin, confirming that the blade had pierced her skin. More than that, it confirmed that this man was ready to end her life.

"That was your worst mistake. And now it'll be your last." He sneers, a now manic smile on his face at the thought of finally getting his revenge.

Blood sprays from the side of the man's head, chunks of skull and flesh spilling across the floor accomponined by the deafening sound of a gunshot. The man stays upright for only a slight second before she feels the knife slip away from her throat, the man collapsing lifelessly to the floor. Dark, crimson blood spills from the exit wound in his head, pooling on the plastic floor of the shop.

Clementine stares at his body for a few moments, giving herself a second to register the events that had unfolded all in the space of a few minutes. Her head snaps to where she heard the gunshot come from, revealing Zara who was holding Clems gun, still pointing at where the man once was. She looked as shocked at her own actions as Clementine felt, slowly lowering the gun back down and moving her gaze to the man she had just killed.

"Holy shit" She muttered softly, looking to the gun she held in her hands and then to Clementine.  
"I--I'm sorry."

"You're... Sorry?" Clementines splutters, in disbelief as to why Zara was apologising.

"I...I shouldn't have just grabbed your gun like that... I shouldn't..." Zara rambles, pushing the gun back into Clementines hands.

"Shouldn't have..." Clementine starts in disbelief, looking to the gun she had been given back and then up to Zaras concerned face.  
"You... You saved my life"

"It's only fair I repay the favor"

"Consider it repaid" Clementine says as he moves to tuck the gun back into her pocket.

"What the hell was he talking about? I heard him say stuff, stuff about you guys killing someone close to him, taking his boy. I find it hard to believe, but did... Did you really do that?"

Clementine opens her mouth to speak, but is interrupted by the sound of pounding footsteps approaching. Fearing that the man hadn't been alone, Clementine goes to move in front of Zara with her gun raised, only to find Zara had tried the same thing, though she had withdrawn her own knife. They bumped into each other, raising a suprised eyebrow at one another before choosing to instead stand side by side, ready to face the oncoming threat.

There is no threat, however, and Clementine instead let's out a relieved sigh at the sight of Louis' form sliding into view, sprinting in their direction as he frantically looked around, an equally frightened looking AJ following just behind him.

"Louis! There!" AJ yells for Louis' attention, pointing in their direction.

"Oh thank God" Louis splutters in relief, not slowing his pace in the slightest as he continues to run over to them.

"Hey, its f-" Clementine tries to soothe him, but he barrels straight into her anyway, wrapping his arms around her and holding her to him so tightly that she's almost pulled up from the floor with him.

"You're okay. Oh, you're okay... " Louis murmers his reassurance into her hair, inhaling deeply to calm himself.

Clementine knows that there's no words she can use to calm him, so instead elects to return the hug just as tightly, equally relieved to see the two of them unharmed. She has to stifle a laugh when she see's AJ trying to force his way through Louis' tight embrace, also as desperate to get closer to Clementine to make sure she was alright.

The three of them remain that way for a moment before Clementine is the one to break the hug apart, though Louis still keeps his hands on her arms, clearly still trying to shake off his nerves.

"I was so fucking scared, I thought for sure..." Louis is unable to finish the sentence, shaking his head as if trying to physically shake away the dark thoughts that had entered his mind as to the possibilities of what had happened.

He moves his gaze from Clementine down to the body on the floor, taking in the gunshot wounds on both sides of his head before looking back to Clementine.

"What the hell happened here. Who is--Whoa, hey, your neck is bleeding." Louis notes worriedly, rising a slightly shaky hand to the shallow gash on her throat that was sluggishly leaking blood.

"Oh, it's fine." Clementine dismissed, raising her own hand to neck and wiping away the blood, wincing at the sting of her hand touching the fresh slice.  
"Suppose its a good thing it happened in a pharmacy"

"What _did_  happen? "

"Guy snuck up on me, had no idea if he had been in here the whole time or not. He had a knife to my neck, and knocked the gun from my hands." Clementine explains, moving her gaze thankfully over to Zara who stood nearby, watching the reunion somewhat awkwardly.  
"Zara grabbed the gun and shot him. Without her.... I think I'd be dead"

"You did that?" Louis asks in a slight tone of disbelief, dropping his hands from Clementine and turning to face Zara.

"Oh... Well, uh... I mean, he might not have killed her, but I didn't want to take that chance, so I-" Zara tries to explain, though is interrupted by Louis engulfing her in a warm hug that she wasn't expecting in the slightest.

It was one of the first comforting touches she had felt in a long time, taken aback by the gratitude she could feel coming from Louis from the hug alone. Not knowing how to respond, she raises an arm to give him a small pat on the back.

"Thank you" Louis whispers when he pulls away, giving her a watery smile before heading back over to Clementine, fussing over the cut on her throat, much to Clementines displeasure.

Zara takes a moment to watch them interact, all three of them clearly a family unit that cared for eachother in a way she had never seen before. She knew that Clementine wasn't AJs real mom, and Louis certainly wasn't his dad. And yet, that didn't matter in the slightest. They _loved_ each other, as a family should. And as she watched them, she realised how much this was something she wanted.

She had told Clementine she would be okay if she had decided she didnt want her in the group. But now, looking at them, she knows that it's not the case. Living on her own, out on the road, all she had thought about was how to stay alive. If she went back to that, that's exactly how she would continue. But these guys? They did more than that. All of them, they could help her to learn to live again. And oh, how she had missed that.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to let you guys know that I'm heading off to Florida next Friday for two weeks, so the updates may stop/slow down until I get back.  
> Hopefully I'll be able to update next Friday, but as you can imagine I'll be busy with getting ready for the trip on top of being at work, so I won't be able to write as much.  
> I might write some while I'm away, but hopefully you guys can understand my priority is taking time to relax and be with my family.  
> Hope you enjoy this chapter!

"They're back! Open the gate!"

Aasims voice booms across the courtyard, quickly followed by the rusty screeching of the gates as its forced open. Its only a few moments after being opened do they see Willy's curious face poking around the gate post, stepping out and to the side once they get close enough.

"So did ya get anything good?" Willy asks curiously, peering at the bags on their backs as if he can make out their contents just from looking at the outside.

"And is that a guitar?" Aasim directs at Louis, although he's pretty sure he knows the answer to that question already.

"Sure is" Louis replies enthusiastically, giving the case a slap

"Did... Did you carry that all the way back from the mall? How..."

"Louis always finds a way" Clementine comments as she pushes past them, desperate to find a place to put her heavy rucksack down and give her aching leg a rest.

Omar is where he's usually found; stood by the pot hanging over the fire, working on whatever meal it is they've scrounged up for tonight. Clementine heads over in his direction, placing her bag down on a nearby table and taking a seat for a moment.

"Everything go alright?" Omar asks as he stirs a wooden spoon around the inside of the pot, mixing tonight's meal.

"Yeah, except it very nearly didn't."

" _Nearly_ didn't? That's doesn't sound like a particularly good thing"

"I'll explain later, in fact I-"

"Now _you_ are a sight for sore eyes" Louis says in greeting to Omar, heading over to stand by the chef and get a look at what what was in the pot.

"Me or the food?" Omar plays along, removing the spoon and resting it on top of the pot for a moment.

"Foods not possible with you, so both" Louis compliments, giving Omar a friendly slap to the back  
"And what exactly _is_ on the menu tonight, Chef?"

"Nothing exciting, I'm afraid" Omar answers, watching in amusement as Louis bends closer to get a better look at what was bubbling away.  
"Didn't have any luck catching anything today, so it'll just be vegetable stew for tonight"

"Better than 'nothing' stew" Louis reassures with a shrug of his shoulders, standing back up from the pot.  
"Hey, what is a stew without anything? Isn't it-"

"Water. It would mostly be water."

"Phew, good thing we don't have that. Instead we get...vegetable...water..."

"What? Parents never made you eat your veggies?" Clementine teases from her spot on the bench

"Well, duh! You don't get _this_ strong without eating your veggies. Isn't that right AJ!" Louis calls over to AJ who is over by the gates talking to Willy.

AJ looks over to Louis at the shout, opening his mouth to ask Louis what he was talking about when Louis flexes his arms, sending both him and Willy into a fit of laughter at the sight.

"I don't think you convinced him" Clementine tells him, raising an eyebrow at the display.

"Oh come on, you can't tell me this isn't working for you!" Louis protests

"Oh, sure. I can _definitely_  tell all the muscle you got under all those layers of trenchcoat"

"Is that your way of asking me to take my shirt off?"

"Please don't" Omar pleads, giving Louis a disapproving look as he continues to stir the stew.  
"Besides, dinners just about ready"

"Actually, as I was saying before Louis interrupted-"

" _Enriched_ your conversation, you mean."

"-Sure, that, is that I need to speak with everyone before dinner."

"What's so urgent that we need to do it before dinner?" Louis asks, frowning in mild worry at the thought of the importance of the coming meeting.

"I can't just pull Zara along on a string anymore, not giving her an answer. I think it's about time we took that vote."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It never failed to startle Clementine when she would look up to see everyone staring at her expectantly, not a soul in the room whose attention wasn't solely directed at her. She would have to remind herself every now and then that this would be the norm now, that everyone would be looking to her as their leader.

"Sorry to delay dinner" She apologises to the group, walking over to the desk and leaning back against it for support.

"Is something wrong?" James asks, voice tinged in concern as he studies Clementine for any signs of worry.

"No, nothing for you guys to be worried about."

"So...What was the rush for this meeting?" Willy pipes up, pushing past the others to get to the front.

"Come on guys, you're smarter than this." Louis comments amusedly from next to Clementine, a smirk on his face as he essentially insults the group.  
"Who is missing right now?"

"Zara" Violet answers quickly, brows furrowed in confusion as to what she had to do with any of this.

"Point to Violet"

"Will you get to the point?"

"Was that a pun?"

"Was what a - -No! I didn't mean to-"

" _Maybe_  if y'all weren't arguing so much we could have heard what Clementine was going to say" Ruby interrupts Violets and Louis' brewing argument, sending a dissapointed glare their way.

"I mean, _maybe_ , but what's the fun in-"

"Louis" Clementine stops Louis from talking further, being one of the only members of the group that could with just the tone of her voice.

"Right, sorry, not important. This is important. Go ahead"

"What's up with Zara? Why couldn't she be in the meeting?" Aasim asks

"Because the meeting is about Zara." Violet answers for Clementine, connecting the dots.

"Yes, it is. I wanted to ask you all about what you think about Zara, and wanted to put forward my own thoughts about it all."

"What for?"

"You may have decided to have me as your leader, but there are some decisions that will affect all of you here. Deciding whether to let Zara join us is one of them."

"We're gonna vote on whether to _keep_ Zara? Seriously?" Violet protests

"It's not that I don't want Zara with us, it's more that I don't want to make the decision on behalf of all of you. I want to make sure everyone knows what they need to, and then everyone gets a chance to cast their vote."

"Okay..."

"Sounds fair.... I suppose?"

"Where do we start?"

"Well, one of the most important parts is of course if we can trust her."

"And can we? Do _you_?"

"It's not as easy as a 'yes' or 'no'. It takes a lot to find trust in people, time and effort. I haven't known Zara for all that long, but... There's a reason James found her passed out in the snow. And I know I said I would tell you all I know, but the reason for it is something I can't tell you. It's personal, something very private that I wouldn't feel comfortable sharing without her consent."

"Wait, she told you? When?" Louis asks

"Back on the road, while you guys were asleep"

"This reason. Is it a good one?" Aasim questions

"As good as any. All I can tell you about it is that I was wrong. That is something I can admit to. I thought those scars might have had a hidden story in them, one that could have made Zara dangerous to us. From what she's told me...This world hasnt treated her kindly. We're one of the few people that has."

"Do you not think she's dangerous any more?"

"To us you mean? No, I don't think so. She's a different kind of dangerous, she's capable of doing what it takes to survive and if we're lucky, she'll do what it takes to make sure we _all_  survive, if given the chance."

"She definitely seems to have a knack for survival" Aasim puts forward his own opinion.  
"From what I can tell, she has experience with the walkers. Takes them out in seconds."

"I saw her fight them too!" AJ joins into the conversation, backing up Aasims claim.  
"She was cool with the monsters, and she has her own knife and everything."

"She's perceptive too" Clementine tells them, pushing herself off the desk and walking past everyone to the corner of the room where she left the backpack from earlier.

She grunts with the effort of lifting such a heavy weight, gradually making her way back over the desk and dropping it down on the top with a heavy 'thud', hearing the sounds of various pills rattling away inside their containers.

"Back at the mall, we came across an untouched Pharmacy, still locked up from way back in the beginning. I couldn't break the lock, and had no idea what the code could be. Luckily-"

Clementine digs around in jacket pocket, pulling out the folded note and tossing it onto the table next to the bag. Aasim is the first to approach, picking it up and carefully unfolding the old piece of paper.

"She found the combination code?" Omar surmises for them.

"On the ground. She noticed that the person it came from was wearing medical clothes and connected the two together. None of us except for her noticed it there."

"Hell, I'm even the one who made the paper drop from the body, and I still didn't notice it." Louis tells them, raising one hand and pointing at himself with the other hand.

"If she hadn't found that code, I doubt I would have gotten into the pharmacy. And if I hadn't?"

Clementine grabs the zipper to the bag, pulling it open and pushing the opening further apart to let everyone get a better look at the mountain of medical supplies stashed within; countless boxes and bottles of medication all stacked up next to each other, far more than they could ever hope to use.

"We wouldn't have gotten all of this. And this isn't even all of it, there was just so much of it there. Thanks to Zara finding the note, I didn't have to smash the lock open, meaning I could lock the pharmacy back up and keep it safe for future visits."

"There's just... So much..." Ruby comments in awe, picking up the closest bottle and studying the label to find out its contents.

"Aren't we kind of missing a big point here?" Louis says, giving a pointed look towards Clementine.  
"You know, the fact that she saved your life?"

A few things happen all at once. Ruby drops the bottle of pills, immedietly going to nurse mode and examining Clementine for any signs of injury. A hum of questions fill the air, each member of the group apart from Louis and AJ throwing out questions as to what happened back in the mall, too many voices making it difficult to pick out what was being said.

"I'm sorry, did he just say-"

"Saved your... What the fuck-"

"What happened?"

"Are you okay?"

"Gosh, how did I not notice that cut on your throat earlier-"

"Hang on a second!" Clementine raises her voice over all of them, unable to think with all the noise.  
"Ruby, thank you, but I'm fine, it's really just a small scratch. As for the rest of you, _yes_ , Zara did save my life. A man came up from behind me and held a knife to my throat, and I no longer had my gun. Zara was the one to grab it and fire at the man."

"Holy shit" Violet muttered quietly in shock and awe.

" _And_ I think we can all agree that we owe Zara for saving Clem" Louis says, subconsciously moving closer to her as he remembers how close he had come to losing her.

"On that, I think its time we make a decision. I'm sure this is pretty nerve-wracking for Zara waiting all by herself." Clementine tells them, stepping around from the desk to address the whole group.

"Okay, so, let's keep this simple. If you want to give Zara a chance and let her stay with us, raise your hand."

Theres little to no hesitation from the group, each person raising their hand into the air, looking around at one another to see everyone else's vote with a hint of amusement on their faces upon seeing how everyone had voted the same.

"Guess we don't have to do the 'say nay' part" Louis jokes, slowly dropping his hand back down to his side, to which everyone follows suit.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck_

They're the only words that Zara brain seems to be able to form in the moment, on a constant repeat as she mindlessly taps her fingers against her legs, nervous energy making her legs bounce as she looks around the courtyart from her seat on one of the tables.

The bitter bite of winters wind chills her to the bone, yet its a welcome distraction from the thoughts plaguing her mind as she waits for the others to come back.

She wasn't stupid. Clementine had asked her as nicely as possible to stay put while the others went inside. That meant only one thing; they were talking about her. She was well aware of the fact that this could be it. At any moment now, Clementine could be returning, telling her to pack her bags and leave what she hoped would become her new home.

She hasn't got much time to dwell too much on it however, as the main doors to the school suddenly push open, the students of the school spreading out to their usual spots. It feels almost like torture, watching them seem so at home. She supposed it was because they are.

She couldn't tell what had happened just based on their faces. They seemed as they usually did, simply going about their day, waiting for meal time which, judging by the way she sees Louis closely following behind Omar as they head over to the cooking pot, should be soon.

"So-" Clementines voice interrupts her people watching, turning to see Clementine take a seat opposite her, swinging her leg over the bench to face her.  
"-You good with having a roommate?"

Zara blinks, taking some time to register the implications behind Clementines words. If she was saying what she thought she was saying...

"Are... Am... You're not joking?"

"Not about this"

"I can stay?"

"You can stay"

"I can't believe...you're serious?"

"Yeah, I am" Clementine laughs, glad to see how much being accepted into the group seemed to mean to Zara.

"I don't even know what to say... I'd hug you, but the tables a bit too long"

"That's okay, I'm not a hug kind of person"

"Lies. Lies and Slander." Louis joins their conversation, placing a handful of bowls down on the table and taking a seat next to Clementine.  
"Clem here is a lot like Violet; they like to try and act tough, but they're really a big ol' teddy bear inside."

"Am not!" Clementine and Violet protest at the same time

"Oh really? Clem, you cling to me like a lost puppy in your sleep. And Violet? There's no better proof for you being a teddy bear on the inside than the fact that you actually still _have_  a teddy bear."

Zara freezes in her movements, spoonful of stew hovering just below her mouth. She turns to Violet and Clementine with a raised eyebrow, seeing them sending death glares Louis's way, though their cheeks are burning a bright red at being outed by Louis.

"I'm gonna die" Louis quietly whispers into his own spoonful of stew, not brave enough to look at them for their reactions.

Luckily for Louis, he's saved from the potential enslaught of choice words that Violet had for him when the others begin to join them at the table, each member eager to dig into the meal for tonight.

Zara chooses not to say anything for a while, staying quiet and observing the others, only joining in their conversations when addressed to. She took the few moments of relative peace to simply listen to the way they intetacted with one another, finding more and more comfort in the way they talked. They weren't trying to skirt around her, or pretend that she isn't there. They weren't even pretending that she was new. They were treating her as if she had always been there, letting her decide when to talk, or to just listen. And she hoped that meant they felt like she belonged there with them.

"AJ mentioned that he was impressed with your knife skills" Clementines voice pulls her out of her thoughts.  
"I haven't really had a chance to see them yet. You as good as these guys claim?"

The other members of the group perk up at Clementines question, all turning to face her at the prospect of seeing a display of skills.

Not wanting to let them down, she gives a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders and reaches into a trouser pocket, smoothly withdrawing her blade and holding the handle tightly as she lifts her hand just above the table for everyone to get a better look. In a quick flash of movement, she flips the knife so that she's holding the tip of the blade before swiftly running the the blade across her hand, twirling the knife across her knuckles in a blur of silver and back across again until the knife reaches her forefinger.

She pushes up on the blade, flipping it once more so that she catches the handle of the knife as it spins in the air. Then, in a movement so quick that no one saw coming due to being so distracted by the display, she pushes the blade towards Aasim next to her, stopping just as the tip of the knife pressed against his shirt.

While she had no intent of actually hurting him, poor Aasim didn't know this; scurrying off the back of the bench so quickly that he lands on his back on the dusty ground with a pained grunt.

"Shit, you good?" She asks him as she quickly drops the knife onto the table, twisting around in her seat and offering him her hand.

" 'M fine." Aasim grunts, gladly accepting her offer for help, grabbing her hand and pulling himself back up onto the bench

"Sorry about that, AJ's the only other one next to me, and, well, it was you or him" Zara explains, picking the knife back up from the table and sliding it into her pocket.

"Honestly, I'm more impressed than annoyed" Aasim admits, turning to give Ruby a thankful smile when he feels her brushing away the dirt on the back of his shirt.

"Makes for a good lesson too; Never let your guard down, even if you feel safe."

"Duly noted" Aasim takes the advice, rubbing at the forming ache in his spine.

"Dude, I am _never_ letting you live this down" Louis says with an obnoxious grin, pushing his finished bowl of stew to the side.

"I don't think any of us will" Violet agrees, also sliding her bowl down to the other finishes bowls that were beginning to stack up.  
"Any chance of some knife lessons?"

A few of them turn to Violet with a raised eyebrow, shocked to hear her actually _volunteering_ to spend time with someone, not just be dragged along to whatever it is that was being asked of her.

"What? It's not like I can practice my archery skills anymore" She defends herself, pointing to her damaged eyes.  
"Might as well learn some more hand to hand if I'm gonna defend myself"

"Sure, I'd be more than happy to" Zara tells her, unable to help but return the thankful smile Violet gave her, something she sees rarely from her.

With their meal finished, it's not long before the group begins to filter out, the darkening of the sky only serving to make everyone feel more tired and strengthening their desire to head to their respective rooms for a good night's rest.

"We should probably figure out where you'll be sleeping" Clementine remembers as she watches everyone head off to the dormitories.  
"Like I said, you're gonna have to have a roommate. Hope you don't mind?"

"No, of course not. I'll take whatever's available."

"Well, you have a choice. Except..." Clementine pauses, a realisation trickling through as she sees James stand from the table.

She grabs his arm as he begins to walk past her, forcing him to come to a stop and look to he curiously, waiting for the reason why she had stopped him.

"Where have you been sleeping these past few days, James?"

"Oh, well... I tried bunking with Willy for a bit but..."

"A little too many questions?"

James nods in agreement, appearing ashamed to admit it.

"I hope you dont mind, but... I took up AJ's offer to bunk with him instead. I can find somewhere else if its going to be a problem, I'm more than happy to-"

"No, no, it's fine." Clementine assures him  
"AJ will be thrilled to have you as his roommate."

"Are you sure? I don't mean to kick you out..."

"It'll make it difficult but..." Clementin pauses, glancing over to see Louis waiting for her by the dormitory door, ready to escort her back to her room as he usually does.  
"Im sure we'll work it out."

James nods once more, a small smile curling his lips as he squeezes her shoulder thankfully, dropping his arm back down after and making his way over to the dormitories.

"At least we know your options now" Clementine comments with a huff, turning herself back to face Zara.

"James and AJ are sharing a room, Aasim and Ruby are sharing a room, seems like me and Louis will be... Sharing a room." Clementine realises, feeling slightly nervous at the idea of essentially 'moving in' with him.  
"Uh, anyway, that leaves you to either share a room with Omar, with Willy, or with Violet."

"Violet." Zara chooses very quickly, getting a bemused look from Clementine as to the speed she answered the question.

"What are- - Don't give me that look" Zara demands, feeling her cheeks burn at the knowing look Clementine was giving her.

"I'm not saying anything, I think it's sweet. I mean, Violet asked you for knife lessons. She _asked_  you to spend time with her. In the walker apocalypse, I'd consider that a date."

Zara huffs, shaking her head at Clems insistence to see it as anything more than Violet offering her a chance of friendship.

"It's not that, it's just that... Im not saying I don't trust Omar or Willy, but I'd definitely feel much safer sleeping in the same room as a girl."

Clementines face immediately switches to one of understanding, features softening in sympathy at Zaras explanation.

"If that's what you prefer, that's okay. It should be fine, as long as Violet doesn't have a problem with it."

"As long as I don't have a problem with what?"

The two of them both startle at the new voice, turning to see Violet approaching the table, apparently having caught the tail end of their conversation.

"We were talking about where Zara is going to be sleeping, and wanted to check if it would okay for Zara to bunk with you?" Clementine explains to Violet, gesturing at Zara who suddenly found the table to be a much more interesting subject to look at.

The question gives Violet pause for a moment, a few seconds of silence that, to Zara, seem to stretch on forever as she waits for Violet to give her answer.

"Sure, I guess" Violet finally agrees with a shrug of her shoulders.

"Thank you" Zara tells her gratefully as she gathers enough courage to look up and lock eyes with Violet, relieved not to have to share a room with someone else.

"No problem"

Clementine clears her throat somewhat awkwardly, forcing the two to break eye contact as she stands from the table.

"I'll leave you guys to sort the rest out. If I leave Louis waiting any longer, I'll be hearing the complaints of boredom for days."

"I noticed that James has been sleeping in your room for a few nights, is that permanent?" Violet asks

"It is now"

"So... You're sleeping...."

"In Louis' room. Well, I still have to ask him."

"And what if he says no?" Violet teases, immediately regretting it upon seeing the look of uncertainty flash across Clementines face

"Do you think he will?" Clementine asks her worriedly.

"What? No! Of course not! Louis has been _dying_ to ask you to move in with him for months now, but didn't want to ask coz he felt like it would be forcing you away from AJ" Violet is quick to reassure her, feeling slightly bad for telling Clementine something Louis has told her in secret. Then again, he was the one that spilled secrets first...

"Gotta say though; his room is right next to mine and the walls are paper thin. Please don't keep us awake" Violet teases, getting an amused snort out of Zara.

"Don't keep you-" Clementine starts in confusion, the implication behind Violets words smacking her head on, feeling the tips of her ears burn red.  
"C'mon Violet, don't be gross!"

"Gross? Ouch, poor Lou."

"I--You--I didn't mean it like that!" Clementine stutters over her words, the embarrassment causing a slight malfunction in her brain.

Clementine shakes her head to clear her thoughts, deciding the best coarse or action was to turn away and head for bed, still able to hear Zara and Violet chuckling at how flustered she had got.

The two of them watch as Clementine finally gets to Louis, forcing down more laughs when Louis inevitably asks her whats up, and seeing how Clementine found no other way out than to explain the situation.

Violet smiles at the look of pure happiness on Louis' face, knowing that Clem must have asked him whether she can move in. It doesnt take long for his face to also to turn red when Clementine tells him Violets comment, though she feels a slight dread in her stomach when Louis seems to push past is quickly, looking over to them with that damn smirk of his.

"If you're gonna ask that of us, it's only fair that we ask the same of you too!"

Just like that, Violet and Zara join them in having red faces, unable to look eachother in the eye and silently cursing Louis for giving them a taste of their own medicine. Now it's their turn to listen to Louis and Clementines laughter at their reaction, hearing them steadily fade away as they head inside the school.

"So, uh..." Violet begins after a much too long stretch of awkward silence.  
"Should I show you the way to the room?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Somethings not right_

The whisper came from her brain, dragging her to conciousness when all she wanted to do is remain in her comfortable state of deep sleep. None the less, Clementine heeded her brains warnings, forcing her eyes open to see what was wrong.

It seems her brain is right, as Louis is no longer sleeping next to her as he was when she drifted off to sleep. While it was possible he had had a nightmare and wandered off somewhere, she couldn't remember a time he had suffered from a nightmare that hadn't woken up her up. Then again, maybe he was better hiding things than she thought and was suffering through some of the nightmares alone. After all, it wasn't too hard to tell he was feeling guilty about constantly waking her up.

The self conscious part of her brain begins whispering cruel ideas to her. Wondering of the possibility that Louis had woken up to see her there, and was beginning to regret having her move into the room with him, that maybe this was a step forward in their relationship he wasn't prepared for. She had to admit, she did sort of spring this up on him.

Clementine pulls herself out of the bed, pushing the covers off from her and reaching for her prosthetic, quickly attaching it to her leg before heading out of the room. It seemed much more practical to take action, rather than just sit here and pondering over 'what ifs'

Naturally, she heads first to the music room where she usually finds him. She smiles victoriously when she hears the soft tones of the piano floating out from the room, but there's something about the music that makes her smile drop and her pace slow without even thinking.

It was her song. Not _her_ song, exactly. Not the one that Louis had written for her. It was 'Oh My Darling, Clementine', but there wasn't something right about it. All the notes sounded slightly off key, only by a bit. Not only that, but the song was being played slower. _Much_ slower, to the point where it was borderline unsettling, sending an odd sort of chill up her spine as she inches closer and closer to the slightly open door.

"Louis? Is that-"

The cover to the piano slams closed the second she peeks into the room, the loud bang echoing around the room and sending her jolting backwards. All at once, all of the candles in the room blow out, starting from one side of the room and ending on the other, changing the warm golden glow of the room to a bleak and black dreariness. And yet, the most unsettling part was that there was _no-one_  in the room, not a living soul. So who was playing the music?

_Somethings not right_

The warning whispers from her brain once more, the whole situation making her heart race in her chest. She was in danger, but she didn't know what kind. There was no physical danger she could see, but at the same time she couldn't shake off the feeling that something bad was about to happen.

Her feet are moving without even thinking, instinctively racing to find AJ, as she usually does whenever she senses danger.

It doesn't take long to reach his and James' room, swinging open the door without even bothering to knock and darting into the room.

"AJ, we need to-"

But AJ isn't there. Neither is James. The beds are perfectly neat and tidy. Almost too tidy, as if nobody had sleeped in them for a long, long time. The wash of fear over her body makes her want to vomit, feeling her mouth dry and making it harder to swallow.

She turns from the room, exiting in a flash and sprinting to the door of the room next to AJ. It yields the same results; beds appearing to be empty and long abondened. Every single room, again and again and again, completly void of human life. Omar, Willy, Aasim, Ruby, Violet, Zara. At first, she wants to say its like everyone had vanished. But it wasn't just like that, it was as if they had never even existed. Had never been in the school.

"What the fuck is happening?" She whispers to herself, though it comes out in a much more trembling manner than she wanted it to.

There's not much else places she can go than outside, so she takes a quick second to collect herself and heads to the main doors that lead out to the courtyard. She pushes the doors open, stepping out to the stone stairs and is nearly at the bottom step when she freezes.

Somehow, she hadn't noticed at first. So distracted on her task that it didn't even register in her brain. She tilts her head up to the sky, mouth dropping open at what she saw.

It was... Nothing. Absolutely nothing. It looked like someone had removed the stars and the moon from the sky, leaving a black sheet stretching across the horizon. But it was more than that. Or 'less', more accurately. It was as if the sky just... Wasn't there. Was gone. Nothing but a void of emptiness left in its place.

There's a flash of movement to her right, head snapping over in the direction of movement. She isn't sure whether to feel relieved or even more terrified when she sees a figure out by the graveyard, gently crouching down by a grave that she can't quite tell whose is.

Clementines moves closer as quietly as she can, still not sure who it was she was looking at. As she gets closer she's just about able to see that the person is placing some delicate looking flowers down on the grave, hearing them quietly sniffle to themselves as they stand from their crouched position.

Without the presence of the moon and stars, its much too dark to properly make out the persons features, having no clue as to their identity. She also chalked this up as to the reason why the person didn't seem to have spotted her yet either, despite how close she now was.

"Louis?" She throws out a guess, hoping to see a familiar face that could explain to her what was going on.

It was a familiar face, but not one that she had been expecting. The figure turns to face her, and she feels her breath catch in her throat when she sees the splatter of blood down the side of his head, a small entry hole on one side and a large exit hole on the other, giving her full view to the mess of flesh and bone within his skull.

It was the man from the mall.

The pieces connect in her brain, coming to a conclusion that she should have long ago.

_This was a nightmare_

None of this was real, simply a cruel trick created by her mind as she slept. She squeezes her eyes shut, expecting to see Louis' sleeping form next to her once she opened them again.

But she didn't wake up.

Her heart, that had begun to calm at the realisation that none of this is real, once again started to beat wildly in her chest when she opens her eyes to see the man still staring at her, trickles of blood slowly creeping down the holes in his head.

_Are you sure this isn't real?_

Its not. It shouldn't be, _couldnt be_. If that was the case though, then why couldn't she wake up?

Self preservation drives her to draw her gun, taking a step back and aiming it at the man's head. His eyes slide down to the gun, looking to it for a while before switching his gaze back to her, giving her a sarcastic laugh.

"Sure. Go ahead. Shoot an already dead man, see where that gets you."

Her aim waivers, seeing the gun shake in her hand as she let's fear take control. The man keeps his gaze locked on her for a bit before turning back to face the grave.

"I can't help but wonder... Did you feel bad for me? For letting me die like that? Did you feel bad, when you gunned down my people? When you took not just my son, but other people's sons and daughters?"

"I didn't take anyone. I didn't..."

"Don't bullshit me. You and your group, you stormed into the ranch, into our home. You crashed a car right through the gates and you opened fire. Those of that werent killed were left to the walkers."

"The ranch... You don't mean-"

"You didn't even tell us what you wanted. Just came in and slaughtered them all, rounding up our children and taking them God knows where. And then she tried, she tried _s_ _o_  hard to keep little AJ safe, make sure you couldn't get them. A child that wasn't hers, she risked her life to keep him safe. Did you even think about that, before you fired that bullet into her face?"

"Of course I did" Clementine whispers, feeling the burning of tears in her eyes.  
"I still hate myself every damn day for what I did, what I had to do to get AJ back to me. But I * _wasnt_  part of that group. Whoever attacked you, I had no part of. I didn't steal those children."

"And why should I believe you? Hell, even if you aren't, how are you any different? They came into the ranch, murdered our people and stole our children. _You_ came into our ranch, _you_  murdered our people and _you_ stole a child."

"AJ is _my_  child" Clementine shouts back, gritting her teeth at the accusations the man was throwing at her.  
" _Your_ people shot at me first, I didn't have any other choice!"

"Did Helen shoot at you first?" He whispers in retaliation

"She... She pointed a gun at me! What was I supposed to do, let her shoot me?"

"How was she supposed to know you weren't one of them? That you weren't there to hurt her, hurt AJ? What choice did _she_  have?"

"I... I didn't know... I didn't want" Clementine attempts to force out some excuses, voice thick with tears.

"What does it matter now... She's dead. Countless others, dead. Tell me Clementine, have you ever stopped to think about how many you've actually killed? How many lives are gone, because of you?"

"Every. Damn. Day."

"Perhaps. But have you ever really _seen_."

She opens her mouth, ready to ask what he means when her gaze slips behind him to the graveyard, which had suddenly changed in the space of a second. The back wall of the school was gone, replaced by rows upon rows of gravestones, all harbouring names.

Some she didn't recognise, countless amounts of people that she had killed who she had never even learnt their name. Names that she did recognise, some only in fleeting meetings, others loved ones that had sacrificed themselves to keep her safe. All of these people, buried deep in the ground and no longer breathing air, no longer have a heart beating away in their chest, all because of her.

"What if I'm not the only person left, Clementine? What if there are others left from McCarroll Ranch that remember your face, and are as desperate for revenge as I was?"

"No... No its not possible, there was no one left..."

"Really? Then how come I was still alive? What if its not _j_ _ust_  McCarroll ranch? How many people have you pissed off, have screwed over in some way? For Christ Sake, you know full well there's a powerful group at war nearby whose valuable leaders and members _you've_ killed."

"The Delta" Clementine whispers to herself in realisation.

"You might have killed Lilly, but you didn't take out the whole group. You have _no idea_ how powerful they might be. You nearly lost your whole group just to her, how are you gonna have a chance in hell at fighting the whole group off with a few kids, a few guns and some bows and arrows."

"Theyre fighting a war right now, they don't have time for-"

"You don't know that. You also don't know how many groups might be out there, just waiting for a new group to find and fuck over. Because I'm going to tell you right now, I already know the end to this story."

The man points down to the row of gravestones in front of him, and she obediently follows his finger to the first gravestone. Her heart sinks at the sight of Louis' name etched into the stone, stepping closer and falling to her knees in front of the grave, trembling fingers reaching up to trace the letters that shouldn't be there.

She forces her eyes away, only to find it gets worse and worse. Each new name makes her want to curl up and disappear, to not have to face what is in front of her. The names of all those that should be alive and with her. Violet. Aasim. Ruby. Zara. Omar. Willy. AJ...

Groaning fills the air from behind her, whirling around and forcing back a choked sob at what she was seeing. Poles had appeared from nowhere, and in each one was a tied walker. Their bodies were littered with bullet holes, all left to bleed out and eventually turn. They weren't just any walkers though. They were them. Their beds weren't empty because they had never existed, it was because they had been dead for a long time.

The sight of Louis' blood soaked trench coat was something she never ever wanted to see, hollow cheeks, dried blood and murky eyes staring back at her.

A quieter, slightly more high pitched growl turns her attention away, and this time there's nothing she can do to stop the sob that forced its way out, tears now streaming down her face at seeing walker AJ tied up to the pole, small young hands now rotted and wrinkled as they reached out for her.

"There's nothing you'll be able to do to stop it. To stop this. So tell me, what are you going to do, Clementine?"

There's no chance of her being able to speak right now, only able to let out choked sobs as she stares at all of their moving corpses, desperate to free themselves from their bounds.

"Clementine." He drawls out her name in an almost teasing manner, as if he was revelling in the torture he was putting her through.

"Clementine" He says her name again, this time in a shorter and much firmer tone.

"Clementine!"

She gasps awake, ripped from her nightmare by the yell of her name. She flies forward, sitting upright and sucking in deep lungfuls of air. Louis had flung himself backwards the same time she had suddenly sat upright, basically hovering over as she slept, growing more and more concerned when she wouldn't wake up.

His face reflects the sheer terror she was sure her own was showing right now, having to take his own deep breaths to calm himself before swiftly shuffling back over to her, grabbing ahold of her shaking arms and looking to her with wide eyes.

"Jesus, Clem. I... You scared the shit out of me"

"Sorry" She mumbles quietly in apology, closing her eyes to collect herself.

"I mean... It was... You... You were _c_ _rying_ , Clem"

It's then that she feels the wetness on her cheeks, raising a hand to wipe away the tears and stare at her now wet hand, shocked to see the nightmare had made her cry in her sleep.

"I know you, and I know the last thing you want to do right now is talk about it. But fuck Clem, I've never seen you like that before, never seen you react to a dream like that. You can't keep this bottled up, this is something thats seriously messing you up."

Clementine sighs, rubbing a tired hand down her face. He was right, she didn't want to talk about this. But he was also right that this was something she couldn't keep to herself, that this was something that would eat away at her forever.

"Does the name 'McCarroll Ranch' mean anything to you? Or maybe 'The Ranch?' "

"The ranch? Yeah, AJs mentioned it a few times and you said something about it once, but never really talked much about it."

"I never really talk about it because... Because I did something, back at that ranch. I did things to get AJ back and I was too much of a coward to tell you about them."

"Why?"

"Because I was scared that you would hate me for it, that you might not love me anymore."

"You don't have to worry about that, Clem. Not loving you? I'm in so deep, that's not possible."

"Don't be so sure." Clementine muttered miserably, reaching a hand up to her sleeve and pausing, turning her gaze from her own arm to Louis, who was watching her reach for her sleeve curiously.

"Theres a reason I usually wear long sleeved shirts" She tells him, yanking up the sleeve in one quick motion.

Louis sucks in a sharp intake of air at the sight of the burnt, scarred skin on her arm, unable to make out what exactly it was he was looking at.

"What is that?" He asks, eyes flicking from the scarred skin on her arm back up to her face.

"When AJ was very young, I met a woman that was part of a group called 'The New Frontier'. They offered for me and AJ to join, and I took it, thinking it would be the best way to keep AJ safe. It's part of their groups joining process to brand their sign into new recruits, to make sure you're loyal to them."

"They _branded_ you? The whole hot poker thing, they did that to do you?"

"At the time it seemed worth it. To suffer through a small moment of pain to make sure AJ had a home.  
Then, AJ got sick. Really sick. There was only one type of medicine that would help, but there wasn't much left. Their doctor refused to give it to AJ, told me that AJ wasnt going to make it with or without the medicine and that it would be better to save the medicine for someone else."

It seemed too cruel, too unimaginable to believe. How could a person come to you with a sick child, a sick _baby,_  and tell that person the medicine they so desperately need is better off being used on someone else?"

"I can't... They just outright refused? Was someone else sick as well?"

"No, not then, anyway. They wanted to save it for future use"

"Well fuck that!" Louis voice raises in agitation, angered by the thought of this group leaving AJ to die.  
"AJ needed the medicine, how could they not see that?"

"I did. I knew it was his best chance of staying alive and I couldn't let any 'loyalties' to this group get in the way of that.  
One night, I snuck into a medical tent and stole the last of the medicine while the doctor was out, dosed up on whatever the fuck he shot himself up with to deal with everything. He woke up, pleading with me not to do it. I had no choice, AJ was going to die. So I injected him with the medicine."

"And that's what did it? It saved his life?"

"At the time, I didn't know. What I did know was that what I had done wouldn't go without consequences, and I was right. They found out, and their leader of security kicked me out from The New Frontier."

"What happened to 'loyalty'? Kicking you out doesn't seem very loyal."

"At that point, it was no skin off my back. AJ now had his best chance of surviving that illness, and that was all I wanted. Except... Except when I went to leave, they refused to let me take AJ."

Clementines eyes are swimming with pain, a layer of shame and regret hiding just beneath the surface as she clenched her jaw at the resurfacing memories.

"I was ready to fight my way out of there, to keep AJ with me and to keep him safe. And then I realised... What I was planning to do? That wouldn't keep him safe. That would only put him in further danger. I started to think back on all my time with him, of how many dangerous situations he had been put in _because_  of me.  
I had to ask myself; ' _Who's better prepared to take care of him? A thirteen year old girl out on the road, or a large group of adults, armed and with medicine?_ '  
And so... I gave him up. I fought through every one of my instincts and handed him over, said my goodbyes and walked out of there before it became too hard for me to leave him."

"What made you change your mind? Why did you go back for him?"

"After giving him up, I was alone. For the first time ever in my life. Living like that, just yourself out in the open... It changes people. It changed...Me.  
Every day, Doctor Lingards words would echo in my head;  
_'He won't make it, with or without the medicine'_  
That medicine was his last hope, but it was no guarantee. As far as I knew, he didn't make it.  
Knowing that? It changed me into someone I barely recognised. I was cruel, uncaring of anyone but myself. Led by the bitterness that I had made a promise to a dying woman to protect her son, and I had failed her.  
Hell, when I met Javi it was after nearly killing him in a car crash. It wasn't until I met him and his family that I began to open myself back up again, to let me feel more... Human."

Clementine pauses for a while to give Louis a break from the non-stop information she was giving him, studying his face closely for his reaction so far. He's not looking at her, rather looking at the bed sheet in front of him. His gaze looks intense, but really he's all in his head, mulling over her story to himself.

"So...What I'm hearing is... You have a thing for car crashes"

It's so very Louis of him to say, and yet the piece of humor in this time of seriousness still catches her off guard, a snort escaping her before she has a chance to stop it. Louis smiles reflexively at hearing her laugh, always a small accomplishment in his mind when he's able to do it.

"Stop it" She says fondly, giving him a playful shove that barely moves him.  
"I'm trying to be serious here"

Louis gives her a polite smile in response, waving a hand to say _'Go ahead, I'm listening'_  
The carefree smile Louis had provoked from her slowly slides from her face, knowing the story wasn't over yet. That she hadn't told him the worst part.

"Javi's sister in law, Kate, was shot by raiders. Some people from another group we knew, Prescott, suggested we head to a city called Richmond, to find someone to save her. On the way there, we ran into a guy who called himself Jesus-"

Now its Louis time to snort, an action that quickly devolves into full belly laughs, leaning back and shaking with laughter.

"He called himself Jesus? Seriously?" Louis manages to get through the laughter, unable to get over the thought of it.

" _Yes_ " Clementine says sternly, and he can feel the irritation rolling off her in waves from where he was sitting. He's quick to lower his laughter, clearing his throat sheepishly and nodding for Clementine to continue.

"Anyway... He told us that Richmond had been taken over by a new group. A group they called 'The New Frontier'.

"Oh... Fuck...Did Javi-"

"No, he didn't know. None of them knew I was part of it. Now I had a problem. The only reason I was sticking around with Javi is because he promised me a car. But if I went with them, the New Frontier would recognise me and I did _not_  want to find out what they'd do if I came back."

"But you went anyway, right? How else could you have found AJ?"

"Again, I wasn't looking for AJ at the time. I was sure he was already dead. It didn't matter though, they made the decision for me. I admitted to Javi that I used to be one of them, and a member of Prescott overheard me. They argued that they could use me as a bargaining chip to get into The New Frontier."

"A fucking bargaining chip? They're aware you're a person, not something to be traded around, right?"

"Javi thought the same as you. That is, until they started to threaten his nephew over it. He had no choice, I don't blame it. Not gonna say it didnt hurt at first."

"I get the feeling the reunion wasn't great"

"It could have been a whole lot worse. They were refusing to let us in at first, until their leader of security came out. Turns out he was Javi's brother, David, who Javi thought was dead."

"I... He... How..."

"Small world" Clementine jokes  
"We were let in, and that's when I found out AJ was still alive. He had done the impossible, and pulled through."

"They let you see him?"

"We didn't leave on the best of terms, so I doubt they would have. If he was there, that is.  
They didn't have time to raise a child, so they sent him off somewhere else to be looked after. To McCarrolls Ranch."

"Oh..." Louis whispers in realisation, now beginning to understand where the ranch came into play in all of this.

"A lot of shit happened and I couldn't leave just yet. People weren't who they seemed, and the city turned to chaos. Walkers flooded the place and David got bit. He didnt make it. We were saved by Jesus and his group, and now The New Frotnier is being led by Javi. I left, with a new hope of finding AJ and being with him again."

"That's... A lot."

"It's not everything. I spent so long looking for him, not knowing where this place was except 'West of Richmond'. I never gave up though and finally, I found it. I was so close.  
Of course, it's never that easy. I arrived and the place is up in flames, and I could hear people screaming and guns being fired. They were under attack, at first I didn't know what for. Naturally, they assumed I was part of the attacking group and began firing at me. I didn't even think, all I was focused on was finding AJ."

Clementine stops, fighting through the guilt of what happened next. Louis is able to see the agony she is suffering through, so he leans forward and gently takes her hand in his, resting their joined hands on the soft surface of the bed and giving it a comforting squeeze."

"I killed them, Louis. These poor people, who were just trying to defend their home, defend their people. I left a man to bleed out on the bridge, I shot a man who begged for death as he burned, I shot another man once in the shoulder, then through the bottom of his head after I forced him to tell me where they kept the children.  
This woman, she... All she was trying to do was keep AJ safe. This child who she she had looked after for the past year when she didn't need to, _begged_  and cried for me not to take them, to take the children. I saw her reach for a gun and I turned back into that person again, shooting right at her face."

Louis remains quiet as he sits, watching Clementine as she all but confesses to him. His silence is slightly unnerving to her, but at the same time she knows his silence is just because he's giving her time to continue. He may be quiet, but his hand does not move from its comforting grip, still entwined with her own.

"You know that man in the mall?"

"The one you tried to kill you?"

"Yes. I'm not sure but... I think he might have been one of them. One of the people of the ranch."

"What makes you think that?"

"He kept going on about how I killed everyone, and how I had taken his son, how my 'group' had taken all of the children."

"Taken his son? But...AJ isn't his... What does he mean?"

"It would make sense, if he thought I was one of the people who were attacking him."

"Why were they stealing the children? What for?"

"I don't know. I don't really want to think about what happened to the other kids. I didn't stick around to find out what who they were, I just grabbed AJ and got the hell out of there. Few years later, I meet you guys."

"The ranch, was that what you dreamed about?"

Clementine shakes her head.

"Not the ranch specifically. I dreamed of the man from the mall. It all reminded me of how many people I've killed, of how many people have died to get me where I am today. To get AJ where he is today. All those people at the ranch I killed..."

Clementine leans back against the wall behind her, resting her head on the wall and closing her eyes, feeling the hot burn of guilty tears in her eyes and doing nothing to stop them from rolling down her face.

"You said they shot at you first, right?" Louis asks, getting a small nod from Clementine.

"Clem, they didn't give you a choice. If you hadn't shot back, you'd be dead. No ifs or buts, if they're shooting at you, they wanted to kill you. You did what you had to do.  
And look, the way you are now? Every part of you screams of regret, of guilt over what you've done. That's what separates you from the assholes who attacked the ranch in the first place, doesn't it? You actually care about the fact you had to take these people's lives. You're mourning for them, for people who, at the end of the day, were trying to kill you. You were wrong, Clem. This didn't make me hate you or no longer love you. If anything, I might just love you more"

Clementines gives a watery chuckle, raising her free hand to wipe away the tears in her eyes before dropping her hand back down and looking to Louis fondly.

"How do you always know the right thing to say?" She asks him, tilting her head with a tired smile.

"I was due to be good at _something_ around here." Louis jokes, shuffling on the bed so his shoulder to shoulder to shoulder with Clementine, copying her posture and leaning his head against the wall behind him.

"Don't underestimate yourself, Lou. You're good at a lot of things."

"Hmmm, maybe you're right. For example, I know when you're not telling me everything." He tells her, craning his neck slightly to look at her.  
"There's something else about that dream. You were crying my name. What was that about?"

Clementine sighs, chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully as she thought over the best way to explain everything to him.

"As awful as that dream was, it made me realise something; we were so relieved to have survived Lilly that we didn't stop to think about the _rest_  of The Delta. We were barely able to fight off just Lilly and some of her people, what would we do if they came back? Even if it was another group of raiders that wasn't the Delta, what chance do we have of fighting them off?"

"Slim to none." Louis answeres honestly, seeing no point of lying in this scenario.  
"Still, we haven't been bothered in a whole year, I doubt they're coming back. They could still be at war, or maybe they lost and were killed, or maybe won and are no longer in the kidnapping business."

"Still-" Clementine begins, glossing over the joke at the end of his statement  
"-Everyone here is unprepared in the event of an attack. Not just unprepared, but under-equipped too."

"I'm not really seeing a way we can change that." Louis tells her

"I think I might have an idea. I also think you're not gonna like it."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise!
> 
> I know I said I probably wouldn't be able to update this week, but I had a weird sudden surge of inspiration the other night and somehow wrote about half the chapter in the space of about three hours without even realising it. 
> 
> Hopefully that doesn't mean the chapter is bad... Guess I'll leave that for you guys to decide lmao.
> 
> Well, hope you enjoy.

For a split second upon awakening, Zara has to fight off the urge to go into fight or flight mode, taking a few moments to remember where she had woken up. She relaxes when she remembers it was Violets room, glancing over to her new roommates bed and frowning when she isn't there, obviously having gotten up earlier than her, which was especially surprising since Zara was an early riser.

She groggily sits up in the bed, swinging her legs around to sit on the edge and sleepily rub at her eyes, brushing away the sleep that had collected in the corners of her eyes. Fighting off the last dregs of drowsiness, she forces herself out of the bed and tidies it up best she can, heading out the room and in the direction of the courtyard.

As expected, there aren't too many people outside at this time in the morning. She spots Omar cooking away breakfast, usually the first to awake and start preparing the days meal to provide everyone with their much needed energy to get through the days tasks.

The next person she spots is, thankfully, Violet. She's sat by herself on one of the tables, scribbling away in what looks to be some sort of journal. Zara approaches quietly, not wanting to startle Violet who seems to be very focused on her writing, gently taking a seat next to her.

Her efforts prove to be fruitless, as Violet still startles slightly in her seat when she appears, quickly closing the book shut before Zara can get a look at it, self consciously tucking it closer to her and out of sight.

"Hey" Zara greets her, pretending not to have seen the book in an attempt to make Violet feel more comfortable.  
"Wanted to say thank you for letting me crash in your room. I imagine it was kind of weird waking up to see me there."

"Nah, it was fine. Was kind of nice actually, to have a roommate again."

"Oh, well that's a relief" Zara tells her honestly, having become slightly worried that Violet would regret deciding to let her stay in her room.  
"Who used to be your roommate?"

There's a brief moment of silence after the question, in which Violet is unsure whether she has the courage to say his name out loud. She forces herself through it, clearing her throat and answering Zara.

"Tenn. Tenn used to be my roommate."

Zara doesn't make the same mistake she did with Louis about Marlon, able to pick up the broken way Violet said the persons name and the uneasiness she showed trying to say the name. She can also briefly recall having seen a grave with the name 'Tennessee' in the graveyard when she roamed around the school, assuming that 'Tenn' was short for 'Tennessee'.

Zaras wracks her brain for something to say in response to this, but is saved when she hears Louis and Clementine exiting the dormitories, in the middle of what seems to be some sort of argument or disagreement.

"You're right. I _don't_ like it."

Zara raises an eyebrow at the sour expression on Louis' face as he joins them at the breakfast table, followed by a slightly fed up looking Clementine. Zara looks over to Violet in questioning, who looks equally as suprised to hear Louis' negative attitude.

"Don't like _what_?" Violet asks, looking to both Louis and Clementine.

"I was just trying to explain to Louis that it might be a good idea to check back on the sunken boat, see if there see any supplies left there-"

"You wanna go _back_ to that hellhole?" Violet asks in disbelief, to which Louis gives Clementine a somewhat smug look, now he he had someone who agreed with him.

"Uh, I'm sorry, what boat are we talking about here?" Zara questions, completely lost as to what they were talking about.

Clementine looks to Violet and Louis, unsure as to whether to tell Zara about their encounter with Lilly and the Delta. Then again, what were the negatives of telling her? The only thing that came to mind is of the slim possibility that the group Zara was in _was_ the Delta. It wasn't exactly like Zara had any loyalties to her previous group, considering the way they had treated her. If anything, finding out that her previous group had attacked them might fuel her anger with them, and perhaps make it more likely that Zara would want to help defend the school on the chance that the Delta attack again.

And if she wasn't part of the Delta, then maybe she had run into them in the past, or at least heard of them. Any information would be useful to them at this point, anything to give them an edge over the more powerful group on the event of another attack.

"There was a group that we had a bit of an... Encounter with." Clementine decides to divulge the information, watching as Zara leans closer to listen.  
"You ever heard of a group that go by the name of 'The Delta?'"

Clementine studies Zara's face closely for any reaction to the name, but can't see any hint of recognition on her face, instead Zara shakes her head with a confused frown.

"No, I haven't."

It seems to be the answer that Clementine is expecting, but she still has a look of dissapointment on her face upon hearing it.

"We don't know much about them-"

"Other than they're dicks..." Violet mumbles angrily under her breath, getting a small snort out of Louis.

"What little we found out is that they're at war with another group up North, and they became so desperate for soldiers that they started kidnapping people from their homes to fight in their war. A few years ago, they did exactly that here."

"They took people?" Zara asks in disbelief, looking to all of their sad faces to confirm her question.

"Marlon, he uh..." Louis begins, frowning down at the table.  
"He ran across them out in the woods, when he was with Brody, Minnie and Sophie. They gave him a choice; either give up some of his people now or they'd come back and take everyone."

"Well he can't just give up anyone, right?" Zara asks, knowing the answer immediately when she begins to connect some small hints she had gotten over the past few days.  
"Oh no..."

"He gave the twins up, and told us all that they had died." Louis tells her.

"And he threatened Brody into staying quiet, being the only witness to what he had done." Violet adds angrily.

"Lied to us about it for a whole year, even when he knew how much Minnie-"  
Violet comes to a stop in her sentence, shaking her head angrily.

"We didn't find out about it until Clementine heard the two of them arguing one night. Brody confessed to Clementine what had happened and Marlon just... Lost it. He hit Brody over the head with his flashlight too hard and she was... Gone" Louis recounts the rest of the story, sounding as if it was a story he didn't want to have to re-live.

"Marlon panicked and locked me down there whole Brody turned. I managed to get out, but not after I had to put her down. Marlon tried to blame her death on me and..."

Louis places a hand on Clementines arm, shaking his head when she goes to continue with the story. Clementine looks reluctant for a few moments before giving in, nodding her head and turning back to Zara.

"We ran across the Delta again, out in the woods and threatened to take more of us. We managed to escape, now with the knowledge that they were planning an attack on us. Which is exactly what they did. We prepared as much as we could, but we were outgunned, and they had more combat training than us. A lot of shit happened, and... They managed to take Aasim, Omar and Violet."

Zara glances over at Violet, who was staring down at her fingers as they reached this part of the story, clearly not too comfortable with it.

"James helped us sneak onto the boat to get everyone back, and we planted a bomb on the boat that Willy made-"

"A _bomb?!"_ Zara splutters, looking wildly around everyone at the table.

"Yeah, I wasn't too happy about that first either..." Louis tells Zara

"There were some... 'complications', along the way. But the bomb went off, and we managed to get off the boat. The group the Delta sent were killed and a bit over a year later, here we are." Clementine finishes the story.

"Okay... Okay, so... _Why_ do you want to go back?" Zara asks

"We managed to bring back some supplies they had had on rafts, but there were plenty of other supplies back on the boat. I don't know how much of it survived the explosion, but I think it's worth a look. The Delta raiders were heavily armed; guns, plenty of ammo. All stuff _we_ could use to defend ourselves."

"What if nothing survived?"

"We wont know that till we go down there."

"But its not _just_ that either, is it?" Louis protests, leaning closer on the table.  
There was a _fl_ _ood_  of walkers by that boat when we left. Who knows how many are still hanging around there?"

"That's exactly why I want to go." Clementine defends her idea, turning to focus on Louis.  
"Only need a few people to scout the area, keeping low so we don't attract walkers if, _if,_  there's still a lot of them. We check if there's anything to salvage. If there is, we come back and plan. If not, we leave it and that's the last we hear of it."

Louis signs, leaning back on the table bench and bringing his thumb up to his mouth to chew nervously at the nail, thinking over Clementines proposition.

"I'm sorry, Clem. I just... I can't. I can't go back there." Violet tells her with a twinge of guilt.

"It's okay." Clementine assures her, tone soft and understanding.  
"If you really dont want to, I won't make you. Like I said, we only need a few people. We've already got me and Louis going-"

"Wh--Wha--Wai--Hang on, I-" Louis attempts to protest for only a moment, caving in with an irritated huff as he crosses his arms. If he couldn't talk Clementine out of it, he sure as hell wasn't going to let her walk into it without him there to keep an eye out on her.  
"Yeah, fine"

Zara looks over to see Clementine looking at her expectantly, slightly taken aback by the fact that Clementine seemed to be hinting she wanted her in on this.

"You want me to help?" She asks just to make sure.

"If you want to. You've proved yourself to be plenty capable, plus it'll give you a chance to get to know the area a bit better."

"Suppose it helps I don't have any bad memories of the place" Zara notes, nodding her head in agreement to accompanying them on their mission.  
"When we heading out?"

"I wanted to ask James if he could come with us. He's our walker expert, if anyone could potentially lead those walkers away from the lake side, it would be him. We'll head out first thing tomorrow morning"

"Tomorrow morning? Then what's up for todays agenda?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was an especially nice day, the warmer weather signalling the start of spring and the end of winter. Zara looks all around as she walks at the surrounding scenery, taking the time to appreciate the beautiful forest around them.

"It really is a nice place here" Zara observes as she reaches out to a tree nearby as they walk, gently brushing against the rough bark.

Violet raises an eyebrow at the action, giving Zara a shrug when she looks over to her.

"I guess so. You get used to it after a while, just a lot of trees" Violet responds, joining Zara in looking around the forest to try and see it the way Zara was.  
"But yeah, I suppose its nice."

The sound of panting takes Zaras attention away from the forest, glancing down to see Rosie keeping a steady pace next to her, her long tongue flopped out the side of her mouth as she pants.

"I still can't get over the fact you guys have a dog" Zara tells Violet as she leans down to give Rosie a scratch behind the ears.  
"I can't even remember the last time I saw a dog."

"Good thing you're not scared of her" Violet tells her.  
"First time Clementine met her, she looked seconds away from stabbing her."

"Huh, really? But Clementine sees so close to Rosie, I'm always seeing Rosie trailing just behind AJ"

"Oh, she's great with Rosie now. Wasn't like that at first"

"Was she scared of just Rosie, like her breed? Or-"

"All dogs, I think. Said she had a bad experience with a dog before, so I'd imagine it would be any dog she was scared of"

All of a sudden, Rosie stops in her tracks and begins to growl, ears pinned down to her head and lips raised in a snarl to reveal her long, sharp and lethal teeth. Violet and Zara follow suit, freezing in place and looking around wildly for any signs of a threat.

"What does she see?" Zara asks as she pivots her head around, struggling to see whatever Rosie was seeing.

"I don't know. But if its a walker, she'd-"

Rosie takes off, interrupting Violet mid sentence as she sprints further into the forest. They watch as she goes behind a patch of thick bushes, and for a few seconds there's nothing. They both startle when they see a walker fly backwards out of the bushes, having been tackled down to the floor by Rosie. The walker only has a few seconds to groan in protest before Rosie is sinking her teeth into its skull, biting down hard and crushing its head between her teeth.

"Whoa" Zara says in a stunned shock, eyes wide as Rosie happily trots back to Violet side, licking away the walker blood that coated her muzzle.  
"How can a dog go from being so sweet one second to a killing machine in the next?"

"Impressive, isn't it?"

"Sure is. Maybe she takes after someone else I know" Zara says as she playfully nudges Violets shoulder with her own.

"Sweet?" Violet protests, scrunching her nose in disgust.  
"Since when am I 'sweet?'"

"Uh, a lot of the time? Like when you agreed to let me sleep in your room? Or when you agreed to let me stay at the school? Or when you were there with me to calm me down when I woke up in a new place? Or-"

 _"Okay,_  I get it." Violet stops Zara before she can feel any more embarrassed.  
"Doesn't make me sweet, though"

"Oh come on, it's a compliment!"

"Nope, being 'sweet' is not a compliment. The part about being a killing machine? Now _thats_  a compliment"

"Alright" Zara concedes with a chuckle  
"I'll keep that in mind for future uses"

 _"Future uses?_  What, you planning on giving me more compliments?" Violet questions, as if such an idea was impossible to think of.

"Guess you'll have to wait and find out" Zara says with a shrug, fighting off a grin at the perplexed look she could see Violet giving her out of the corner of her eye.

It's not long before they hear the sound of rushing water, walking across the bridge of the river that seemed to sparkle under the sun's bright light. They stop just before the fishing shack, giving Zara some time to check the area out before entering.

"How exactly are we gonna fish? Do we have rods or something?"

"Nope, there's some spears stored in the shack" Violet answers as she points to the shack ahead of them.  
"There's also some net traps up the river we'll need to check for fish. Usually get a couple that way."

"Wow, you've guys got a greenhouse, you can go out hunting _and_ you got a place to fish. You must be set for food."

"Not always." Violet disagrees, walking over to the entrance to the shack with Zara just behind.  
"It's not always a guarantee we'll catch any fish, and the rabbits are damn good at hiding, even harder to hit. For the greenhouse, well, we've only had food growing for a year. Don't get me wrong, it's definitely easier now that we've got food growing and we don't have the safe zone, but there's a lot of us and food is sometimes scarce"

"Uh, safe zone?" Zara picks out as Violet pulls open the door to the shack.

"Nothing, it doesn't really matter, it's gone now." Violet brushes her off, grabbing the spears off the wall and passing one over to Zara.  
"We've got some fishing to do"

Zara nods, stepping forward to follow Violet when she notices the gaping, splintered looking hole in the wall next to her.

"Whoa, what happened there?" Zara throws the question out to Violet, pointing to the wall when Violet turns around to see what she was talking about, tensing immediately when she catches sight of it.

"Oh, uh..." Zara starts awkwardly when sees Violets reaction to it  
"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"No, it's fine." Violet gets out in a curt manner, closing her eyes for a few seconds.  
"Talking about it is supposed to make you feel better, right?"

"It has in my experience, yeah"

"There was something on that wall, that... That I kind of just wanted to forget. Or... I don't know if forget is the right word, but I didn't want to see it anymore."

"What was it?"

"A carving. That I made a few years ago with Minnie, someone I was... Close to."

"Close to? What do - - oh... Minnie was your...?"

"Yeah, she was." Violet answeres defensively.  
"Is that a problem?"

"A problem? No of course not, if it was a problem then I'd have a problem with myself."

"Oh..." Violet says, to which Zara snorts at the same tone of realisation Violet had as she did.  
"Shit, I'm sorry to go all... On guard like that. Sometimes when I tell people about, y'know, that, they don't always react well."

"Don't worry about it." Zara dismisses the apology.  
"Trust me, I understand. So, uh... This Minnie... Is she... Still with us?"

"No. No, she died about a year ago."

"God, I'm so sorry."

"It's fine, she... Well, let just say its not the first time I've grieved for her."

"What?"

"It's.. Hard to explain. There was a time where we thought she was dead, but she wasn't. She came back, but the person who came back wasn't the person she once was. It all sort of opened my eyes up to the way she treated me throughout our relationship. Sure, we had our good moments but...She was always the controlling one between us, and she never really saw me for who I really was. I didn't really think much of it back then."

"Why?"

"I don't really know. I was in love with her, so I would just overlook all that stuff. I didn't think about it when I thought she was dead, because you don't think about the bad stuff, y'know? You remember the good times. Seeing who she became and what she had done... It all put it into perspective for me."

"Did you regret it? Being with her?"

"Yes. I mean, no. I mean-" Violet sighs irritably as she struggles to answer Zaras question, glancing over to the ruined carving on the wall.  
"I wish it could have different. To not have to look back at it all and be reminded only of the pain, but... That's just how it is."

The room falls silent after Violets says this, Violet looking sadly to the wall while Zara looks sadly to Violet, frowning at the pain on her features as she reminisces.

"We should get going" Violet instructs quietly, turning away and making her way out of the shack.

The two of them stand side by side by the rivers edge, spears in hand as the study the water closely for movement. Rosie is standing diligently nearby, keeping on guard for any threats to them.

They hadn't said a word to eachother since their conversation in the shack, not knowing how to follow up such an awkward and emotional topic. The tension between them was getting too much for Zara, searching around in her brain for something to talk about as they fish.

"You said something about food being scarce?" She settles on, briefly looking over to Violet before focusing back on the water in front of her.

"It's better than it was. We've started trading now, which definitely helps. It's actually how we got the seeds for the greenhouse. Before that, we relied on being able to catch fish and rabbits, any other wildlife we can find in the woods."

"And that didn't always work?"

"Not all the time. Aasims's pretty good at hunting, but we all have our bad days and sometimes the rabbits just aren't there." Violet explains just before she strikes down in the water, holding back a curse when she isn't able to hit the fish.

"What do you use for hunting?"

"Bow and arrow mostly. Louis built some traps out there to catch the rabbits, rope traps, that sort of thing."

"Do you catch them alive?" Zara asks as an idea begins to form in her head, thrusting the spear down and piercing a passing fish, scrunching her face in disgust at the blood that turns the water red as it flows over the dying fish.

"Yeah... Why?" Violet asks with a tone of confusion, glancing over to Zara as she pulls the fish off the end of the spear and chucks it into the nearby bucket.

"You guys any good at making stuff? Like with wood, that kind of thing?"

"Willy is" Violet answers immedietly, not knowing anyone else in the group that was as into crafting as Willy was.

"You ever hear the phrase 'fuck like rabbits?'"

"... Sure..."

"Well, I was just thinking if you're catching them alive, why don't you keep them alive _in_  the school? Make some cages to keep them in one place outside. That way they can munch on the grass and you can feed them anyway leftover vegetables. Let them breed and then you got more rabbits."

Violet pauses after hearing Zaras idea, pulling her spear out of its striking position and resting the end on the ground as she thinks over the idea.

"That might actually work. We've got some spare material lying around, I'm sure Willy will be more than happy to make something. Maybe bring it up with Clem?"

"Sure thing" Zara agrees as she strikes down once again, pulling her spear out of the water to reveal a flailing fish on the other end.

As she goes to throw the fish down into the bucket, she hears a splash from the water as Violet has another go at spearing a fish. She takes a few moments to watch Violet as she fishes, taking advantage of the fact that she was behind Violet who wouldn't be able to see her watching. It was the most at calm she had ever seen Violet, concentration on her face as she watches the water for the fish that would swim by.

Another idea pops into her head, placing her spear down on the ground and rummaging around in her bag.

Violet squints down at the water, struggling to make out the difference between a passing fish and the small ripples made by the current of the river. A flash of movement has her bringing her spear down, satisfaction bursting in her chest when she feels the movement of a fish on the other end of the spear.

She grabs hold of the spear, pulling it towards her until the fish is in reaching distance, looking appreciatively at the size of the fish she had caught. An odd clicking sound makes her freeze, taking a while to realise what the sound was, having not heard it in a long, long time.

"Did...Did you just take a picture of me?" Violet asks with a confused frown, turning to see Zara with a slightly guilty expression, camera in hand.

"Sorry, I probably should have asked." Zara apologises sheepishly, grabbing the dispensed photo and shaking it in her hands, flipping it over to see how the picture came out.  
"Wouldnt have been as good if I didn't take it then and there, though. Here, take a look"

She steps closer, handing the photo over to Violet who gives her a quizzical look before glancing down at the photo. Violet spends a few seconds looking at the photo, glancing up at Zara in confusion and then back at the photo.

"What am I supposed to be looking for here?" She asks Zara.

"Well, what do you see?"

"I see me with a fish" Violet states as if obvious, getting more and more confused by the second.

"Yeah, but look" Zara tells her, tapping at the photo.  
"You're _smiling._ I barely ever see you smile"

"Not many reasons to smile" Violet mutters, handing her the photo back

"Well, what made you smile this time?" Zara asks as she takes the photo back, placing it safely in her bag.

"Don't know, just did." Violet tells her as she shrugs her shoulders.  
"It's usually difficult for me to actually catch anything now, so..."

"Why's that?"

Violet gives her an "are you shitting me?" look, raising an arm to point at her face.

"In case you didn't notice, my eyes are pretty fucked up"

This was the time to ask her. She knew it, especially since Violet seemed to be more talkative today, more open to talking about how she felt and what had happened in her past. Still, the thought of asking her made her heart race, nerves increasing and making her feel jittery, unsure as to how Violet would react to the question.

"Can I ask... How did that happen? Its fine if you don't want to, I was just wondering..."

Violet sighs the second the question leaves Zaras lips, not a great sign that Violet was up to talking about it. Despite this, she places her spear down on the ground, to which Zara does the same, wondering if she was actually going to get an answer.

"You remember what Clementine was telling you earlier? About the bomb we planted on the Deltas boat?"

"Oh..." Zara says in realisation, though frowns when she realises something else.

"But wait, were you the only person who was injured in the explosion? How..."

"Minnie. She... She was on the boat that night. The Delta had twisted her into one of their loyal soldiers and... They started to twist my mind, too. I acted like a real shithead to Clementine when they showed up to save us, and refused to believe her when she told us they had planted a bomb. Minnie got injured in a fight and I refused to leave her side. Minnie seemed to believe there was a bomb, and we rushed down to the boiler to try and stop it. "

"You wanted to stop it? But...I thought the plan was to blow up the boat?"

Violet looks down the ground guiltily, inhaling deeply as she prepares to tell Zara the rest of the story.

"At that point, I believed Minnie and the others. About how we could be safer going with them back to the Deltas camp. I thought maybe if we stopped the bomb, no one would have to die. We didn't make it in time, and the bomb went off. When I woke up, everything was dark."

"Fuck..." Is all Zara can say, looking to Violet in sympathy.

"Yeah" Violet mutters, agitatedly picking her spear and bucket of fish up off the ground, marching off in the direction of the school, leaving behind a slightly bewildered Zara and a whining Rosie.  
"Fuck indeed"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zara sits on the edge of what was now her bed, watching Violet putter around the room, getting ready for bed. An awkward feeling was left between them after their chat whilst fishing, leaving Zara uncertain as to how she should talk to Violet.

"Good thing we caught a lot today, had plenty for dinner" Zara throws out, hoping to get a conversation started.

"I guess" Is the short answer Violet gives, bringing the topic to a halt.

"So, uh..." Zara fills the silence, desperately trying to think of something else to say.  
"Anything I should look out for tomorrow? You know, anything that might be dangerous?"

"Walkers, I suppose"

Zara frowns at Violet who has her back to her, facing the bed as she fiddles with something. It was getting to the point now where Zara didn't know what to do, feeling like she had emotional whiplash from the sudden change in Violets demeanor. While Clementine had assured her that it wasn't due to anything she was doing, she couldn't help but worry that it actually was, especially considering she seemed to clam up once she had begun to probe a bit too much at Violets personal life.

"Okay, I've got to ask" Zara finally gathers up the courage, the seriousness of her tone getting Violet to turn around and give her her full attention.  
"Is it something I did?"

This only serves to confuse Violet more, who narrows her eyes suspiciously at the question.

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"Me and You. One second, you're talking to me like we've known eachother for years. The conversation is easy, just back and forth between us, completely natural. All of a sudden, you start treating me like a stranger you want nothing to do with; nothing but short answers and avoiding eye contact. I tried talking to Clementine about it and she said it wasn't something I was doing but I can't help but feel it _is._  I want you to tell me honestly if it is, and if there's something I can do about it. "

Violet seems absolutely gobsmacked by this, physically jolting her head backwards at the earnest way Zara was telling her this, clearly upset at what was happening.

"Why do you care?"

 _'What_ _kind of question is that?_ ' Zara thinks to herself, taken aback by how little Violet seems to think others care about her.

"Because.. Because I like to think we're friends. I think we could be really good friends, but...If there's something I'm doing that makes it so that can't happen, I need to know so I can make a change. This is my new home, _you guys_ are all a part of that. I want to do what I can to make that easier, I want to get to know _y_ _ou,_ the _real you,_ better. Even the bad stuff that comes with it."

The silence that comes after her admission is palpable, and for a moment Zara panics that she's fucked it all up, crossed over a line she can't come back from. Then, Violet begins to move over to her desk, digging around until she finds what she's looking for. She walks over to Zara, placing a book in her hands and stepping back.

"I was never much of a talker. Especially when it comes to how I feel." Violet explains, leaning back against her bed frame with arms crossed, looking down to the ground in mild embarrassment.  
"In order to get past that, Ruby suggested I keep a journal. Anytime I'm feeling overwhelmed with emotion and don't know how to process it, I write it down in that book"

The book feels much heavier in her hands now she knows the contents of it, looking down at it in shock and then back up to Violet.

"You want me to-"

"Yeah, I want you to read it." Violet tells her.  
"I'd never be able to tell you it, so... It'll be easier this way."

"Are you sure? I mean, this seems like private stuff..."

"Yeah, it is. But..." Violet trails off, a conflicted look on her face.

"You're one of the first people to _ask._ People usually find out about the way I am and they accept it, y'know? They either try and ignore it, or, if you're like Louis, spend every waking moment trying to cheer me up." Violet tells her with a small smile at the end of her sentence, getting a small chuckle out of Zara.  
"You barely know me, but... It seems like you actually _care._ So, if you want to know, then there. That's your answer."

Violet doesn't wait for her to respond, quickly turning from her leaning position and climbing onto the bed, laying down facing the wall and, apparently, going to sleep.

Zara quietly stands from the bed with book in hand, making her way over to the only desk in the room, pulling out the tucked away chair and taking a seat. She places the book onto the table and flips open the first page, reading from the limited light available by the candle sat nearby on the desk.

' _This is stupid. I know it's stupid. I don't want to have to do write all of this, but what else can I do when Ruby is shoving the damn thing in my hands._  
_"Write how you're feeling." She told me, "Start from the beginning, where everything started."_

_When what started? When I watched my grandma shoot herself through the chest with a rifle? When my parents decided they didn't want to deal with me, and sent me off to this shit hole? When I had to live in fear around the students, not knowing how they would react when they found out who I was? When I thought I found someone who understood, someone I felt comfortable with, only to have them taken away from me?_

_Or should I start with Marlon being shot through the fucking skull, Brody having her head bashed in and on top of that, finding out that I had been grieving for the one I loved for a whole year, only to find out they're not really dead?_

_Oh, and let's not forget that it turned out that the people who took her came back for all of us and the person who I thought understood me just fucking gave me up, even when I did all I could to save her?_

_Yeah, there's a lot of places the start. How am I feeling about all of it? I don't fucking know, there's nothing I can pick out right now, just a whole lot of pain and anger._

_This is fucking stupid.'_

That was a whole lot to take in, and at the same time she felt like she knew even less than she did before she read Violets first entry. She decides not to dwell on it too much, flipping the page over to the next entry, hoping it would provide her with more answers.

' _Ruby asked if she could take a look at what I had written and I didn't really give a shit about it all, so I gave her the book. She wasn't too happy with me only writing one entry, and that apparently I wasn't putting much effort into it. She kept going on and on about how I "Need to write more specifically, be true to my feelings and face them if I want to recover and move on."_

_I snapped and we fought, I said some cruel things and Ruby got upset. I felt like utter shit when she looked like she was on the verge of tears, and yet she was still trying so hard to get me to understand, saying that she couldn't stand seeing me destroy myself like I was. Ruby left in tears, and I'm pretty sure Aasim is pissed at me for snapping at her like I did. At the time I was still angry over everything and stormed off, but now I've had some time to cool off and think._

_Me and Ruby were never the closest of friends, so I wasn't expecting her to care as much as she did, to see her so upset all because of me. Because she hated seeing me act the way I was. If she's so certain that this might help, then I guess I'll give it a try. I owe her, and everyone else that much, anyway.'_

That entry was surprising, to say the least. It was a whole different tone from the previous one, going from adamantly insulting the idea to being more receptive to it, even if it was for the sake of the others and not her own. Still, at least it meant she was trying. She flips the page, ready to read the next entry.

_'I visited the graveyard again today, and something new happened. Louis was there to visit Marlon, and for the first time, I felt sad seeing his grave. I couldn't figure out why, since all I've felt every time I've seen his grave so far is either this feeling of numbness or bitterness. I couldn't put my finger on what had changed, so I came to start writing, see if I can figure it out._

_Marlon had always been my friend, but we were never close friends, not like he was with Louis. Not like I was with Minnie. So when Clementine told us what she had found out about the twins, about how Marlon had traded them away for his own safety, I knew I would never be able to forgive him. Not completly. For a whole year, I grieved for the twins, heartbroken over losing someone I never thought I would lose. So many kids died over the years but for some reason, I assumed it would never happen to Minnie. So when it happened, when Marlon told us her and Sophie were gone, I didn't know what to do. I shut down, and that was that._

_Knowing what he had done, the lies he had forced us to live for a whole year, all while he bullied Brody into keeping quiet? I think that's why I didn't get as pissed as everyone else when AJ shot him in the head-'_

Zara pauses in her reading, having to go back over the last sentence to make sure she was seeing it right. She had heard about Marlon from Louis, only being briefly mentioned. He was dead, she knew that much, but she certainly didn't know the reason for his demise was the sweet, seemingly innocent boy under Clementines care.

_'-Anytime I looked at his grave, it was all I could think about. Knowing that because of him, I had lived in misery for the past year, thinking Minnie and Sophie were dead. Knowing that he turned into such a coward that he was willing to give her and Sophie up, and I had no idea what kind of hell they were living through with these raiders._

_Seeing Louis at his grave, seeing the grief on his face reminded me that Marlon had people that still cared about him, that they missed him. Even after all he did, Marlon even admitting to what he had done, they still missed him. And it made me remember that once, Marlon was my friend. That I was holding onto this anger at him, and really, what use will that do when he's dead? Nothing, nothing but leave me in this angry, bitter state._

_If I want to move past this, I need to let go of this grudge I have towards him. I still haven't forgiven him, and doubt I ever will. I have to acknowledge and learn to live with what he did to all of us, to the twins, and to Brody._

_Oh, Brody... It's not hard to pinpoint the way I feel when it comes to you. Shame and guilt. It's overwhelming, always there in my mind whenever I think of you. Whenever I walk past your grave. Of having to see your turned corpse as we buried you. I can't even begin to imagine how awful it was, how scared you must have been the whole time Marlon scared you into staying quiet._

_All that time after I treated you like dirt, blaming you for Minnie and Sophies 'death', too cowardly to tell you directly why I was treating you the way I was. And all that time, you were trying so hard to patch things back up between us, keep our friendship alive and I just threw it away._

_Now I can never tell you I'm sorry for it, and that I don't blame you for what happened to Minnie and Sophie. All I can do is write this down and hope that if there is an afterlife, you are living in a better one than you were and maybe, just maybe, you'll read this and know.'_

It was hard to read. She didn't even know these people, but she could feel the pain Violet felt about them radiating off the page from the words she had written.

The next page is different. Not just what she had wrote, but the paper itself. Blots of water that she could only assume were tears were scattered across the page, Violets usual neat and tidy writing becoming messier, less organised, written by shaky hands. Some of it was difficult to read due to being smudged by the tears and, most alarming of all, was the few splatters of blood she could see.

_'There's only so long I can put off writing this one. After all, it's all I can ever think about, and if this is supposed to make me feel better I should probably stop ignoring it and start writing._

_I told Louis today. About how I really felt about... Everything that happened. Maybe it's because I'm writing more now I felt more like sharing, I don't really know. I thought that if I got it all out in the open, maybe I would feel better about it all._

_So I told him. I told him about Tenn. I told him of the terrible truth I'm hiding within myself; the fact that I can't stop myself from blaming him for what happened. I know it's unfair to say that, especially since I wasn't actually there. Or maybe that's why I do blame him, without all the facts it's easiest to do so._

_The look on his face... There's only a few times I've ever seen Louis cry. I caught him once, in the piano room, when everything started and we were all just a bunch of kids, abondened by those meant to protect us and scared shitless. I think that's when me and Louis started to become closer, when we were able to open up to eachother about how we were really feeling._

_He cried not too long ago, when we thought we were going to lose Clementine. That's understandable, the guys so in love with her that losing her would break him. Same as it broke me when Minnie was taken away._

_Louis is one of those guys who never stops trying to make you smile or laugh. Even when the only thing his attempts do is piss you off even more, he never stops trying. And I never tell him that that's the reason I end up smiling. He never stops trying, because he genuinely does care about us. About me._

_Which is why I feel all the more worse. Here's a guy who, as long as I've known him, has only ever done what he could to make me smile. And now I'm the reason for his tears. What kind of a thank you is that? To make him feel like shit, when I know he's grieving over Tenn just as much as I am?_

_I see a little of Tenn in AJ. It's a battle in my mind whenever I look at him. I either see that small part of Tenn that rubbed off on AJ; a sweet young boy who likes to draw. Or I see a different part of AJ; the ruthless survivor who made a choice to end another's life._

_AJ was the one to pull the trigger. He was the one who decided to end Tenns life. He had to make the choice; Tenn, or Louis? I don't know if I could have made that choice, if I was in the same situation._

_Now I know I can never let Louis read this because yeah, I do think Louis is my best friend. But Tenn? We were always close, but after Minnie was taken we grew even closer, forced together by our grief. It seems odd that some of the strongest of bonds between people can be be formed by pain. Still, it's true, as Tenn was like a little brother to me-'_

The writing becomes noticeably more untidy here, almost incomprehensible to the point where Zara is having to fill in the blanks of some words smudged to the point of no longer being words in order to fully read the rest of the entry.

_'- I think it's really starting to sink in now. I had already accepted that Tenn is gone, but... I'm only just starting to realise I'm never going to see him again. Ever. That's it, he's gone. I won't be able to see his newest drawing, I won't be able to comfort him whenever he misses his sisters, or be comforted by him when I missed them. I'll never hear his voice again, or his laughter. All of him, it's all gone._

_Why was it him? Who, or what, made the decision that he was the one who had to die, whilst I was able to stand a few feet away from a fucking explosion and still live? I don't know if it's God, or just random choice, or fate, or whatever it is, it's all fucking bullshit._

_I can't even cry right. I'm not even allowed to shed normal tears for him, instead my fucked up burnt eyes are making me cry blood. Another thing to add to the list of shit that comes with this._

_Is it even worth it? Trying to live like this? My own happiness aside, how long do I really have? Let's be honest here, my chances of being killed have fucking skyrocketed ever since I've gone fucking blind. I'm nothing more than a dead woman walking, living on borrowed time._

_Writing isn't making me feel better. Maybe I'll feel better tomorrow, or when I look back on what I've written. I've already fucked up the pages, so I've had enough.'_

Zara was feeling the same way, as she finished reading the entry. She could still see more entry's in the book, but for now she felt she had read enough. The pieces of the puzzle that was Violet were starting to come into place, painting a picture of why she acted the way she did.

It's easy to forget, when you're living in your past suffering, that other people have gone through their own personal hells that, even though you might not be able to compare or relate to, can also keep its despairing hooks sunk in and keel them dragged down.

Zara closes the cover of the book as gently as she could, not wanting to damage something so important that wasn't hers. She places the book delicately on the desk between their beds, careful not to place it too close to the still burning candle. The candle had burned a significant amount, streams of still warm wax making a trail down the sides of the candle and collecting in a pool in the candle holder. The small flame was flicking with the draft that blew around the school, casting shadows that seemed to move, when it was really just a trick of the eye.

Zara moves her gaze from the candle to Violet. She was in bed as she was when she started reading, facing away from her to the wall. While her breathing was slow and gentle, Zara could tell she wasn't asleep. Not that she could blame her, how exactly do you fall asleep when you know someone is reading your inner most private thoughts just a few feet away from you?

She could already tell the book would be private before she had opened it, but that didn't at all prepare her for what was inside. It wasn't a bad thing, in fact it did exactly as Violet had hoped it would; to help her get to know and understand Violet more.

Now though, she had no idea what to say. There was no doubt Violet didn't hear her close the book and place it down, so she knew she had stopped reading it.

Her first instinct is to say sorry. To sympathise with her pain. But how can she? Sure, she's suffered her own loss, but how can she compare that to hers? No, saying 'I'm Sorry' didn't sound good enough, didn't sound _caring_  enough. You would hear it so often that people just said it as a reflex, and it no longer carried the meaning it once had.

Instead, she says the only words that her mind can come with up. The only words that she hopes Violet takes to mean in the way she is trying to express.

"I understand."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So far, everything was going to plan. Clementine and Louis were taking the lead, side by side as they lead the rest of them through the forest towards where the Delta boat had sunk. James was with them, having, unsurprisingly, agreed to Clementines offer in joining them to check out the boat and its surroundings, more than willing to give his walker expertise.

Well, there was  _one_  thing that hadn't gone to plan. That thing was AJ, who, having heard that Clementine was planning a trip out without him, had thrown quiet a fit over being left out. Clementine relented after realising arguing against him was pointless and now here they all were, only one of them still upset about having to go back to the boat.

"Why are we scouting anyway? Shouldn't we just go there, take what we can and leave? I don't really want to come back here more times than I have to." Louis says, speaking to Clementine but not looking at her, instead keeping his focus on the surrounding forest for any signs of walkers.

"Like I said, we don't know how many walkers are still left out there. If theres a small enough amount that we can deal with then sure, we'll grab what we can. Considering how much we saw on the boat, I doubt we'll be able to take it all and will have to come back anyway"

Louis gives a dramatic, rather childlike groan in response to this, clearly not excited about the prospect of having to return.

"You don't _have_ to come back, Louis. If you really don't want to, I'll be fine on my own."

"Nuh-uh" Louis protests, shaking his head frantically.  
"No way I'm leaving you alone out here. I'll get over it, if it means keeping you safe."

The sentiment was sweet, but at the same time Clementine didn't like the idea of being coddled. She had survived a long time out here, and it wasn't like she would be alone out here, instead taking someone else with her from the group that didn't mind returning to the boat.

"You don't have to keep me safe, Louis. I'm more than capable of protecting myself."

"I know that!" Louis is quick to defend, hearing the twinge of annoyance in Clementines voice.  
"But I prefer having you close, y'know? Last time we were seperated, you nearly got your throat sliced. And the time before that, AJ brought you back without a leg and I had to watch you be brought back to life by Ruby."

Well, there's not exactly much she can reply to that, now can she? Especially when she knew full well that if the situations were reversed, she wouldn't want to let Louis go out to somewhere potentially dangerous without being able to keep an eye on him.

"Alright, fine." Clementine agrees, getting a thankful smile from Louis.  
"But could you please stop the complaining about all this? It's not like I'm _enjoying_ doing this, but it's something we need to do. The sooner we do it, the sooner it's over."

"Do you not know me at all, Clem?" Louis proclaimed in fake offence, dramatically placing a hand over his heart as if wounded.  
"You of all people should know that complaining is second nature to me! 'Complaining' is my middle name."

"Oh, really?" Clementine challenged, and Louis felt himself sink slightly at the mischievous look in her eyes.  
"I could have sworn you said your middle name was-"

"Clem..." Louis warned, squinting in distrust.

"Oh, what was it..." She pretended not to know, a teasing grin on her face.

"Clem, _please-"_

"Could it be... Alexander?"

Louis threw his head back with a groan, quickly throwing his head back forward and giving Clementine his best angry glare.

"Come on, you _know_ how much I hate my middle name." He protested with a pout.

"You don't like it?" AJ asks, joining into their conversation with a confused frown.

"What's wrong with 'Alexander'?" James also asks.

"Yeah, it sounds nice." Zara pipes up from the back, being drawn into the conversation.

"See? What did I tell you. Your middle name is fine." Clementine assures him, though Louis still refuses to see it that way.

"Yeah, well, it seems fine when it's not  _your_  middle name." Louis mumbles in response.

Clementine rolls her eyes, knowing the conversation was going no where. She glances over her shoulder to the others, who, like them, were focused on their surroundings, on a constant look out for danger. All except Zara that is, who seems lost in thought as they walk. Clementine slows her pace slightly, allowing Louis to take the lead and slowing until she's by Zaras side.

"You still with us?" Clementine jokes, waving a hand in front of Zaras face. Zara rolls her eyes with a chuckle, nodding her head 'yes'.

"Yeah, sorry. I've got some stuff on my mind."

"Like what?"

"You know when I asked you about Violet being so... Changeable? As in, with how she treats other people."

"Sure, I remember. Did something happen with Violet?"

"Not in a bad way. At least, I don't think so." Zara told her, furrowing her eyebrows as she thinks back to last night.  
"Yesterday, she was really talkative, back when we were fishing. Told me all about the girl she used to be with, and what happened with her."

"You mean Minnie?" Clementine asks in a shocked tone.  
"She told you about Minnie?"

"Yeah, I was as suprised as you are. We had a good talk about it and I started to feel like I'm getting to know her a bit better, you know?"

"I'm glad to hear she's opening up to you. Truth be told, I think she's been feeling a bit lonely recently. Especially with her eyes being in the condition they are, she can't go out as much as she used to."

"This might make me sound like a bit of a creep, but..." Zara began, pulling her bag around to her front and pulling out the photo she took the day before.  
"I had an idea, when we were fishing. Violet was so happy to have caught a fish and I felt like I needed to capture the moment."

Zara hands the photo over to Clementine, a small smile appearing on her face at the rare display of happiness from Violet in the photo.

"I was wondering...would anyone have any objections if I started taking more pictures? I thought maybe we could start a photo album of some sort, like people used to do."

"It would be nice to have more than just memories..." Clementine agrees, flicking lightly at the corner of the photo with her forefinger as she thinks.  
"Sure, why not? So long as no one else has a problem with it."

"A problem with what?" Comes Louis' voice from ahead, who had slowed down slightly to listen in on their conversation.

"Zara was just saying about how she wanted to take some pictures of all of us, start making a photo book." Clementine catches him up, looking over to Zara who nods to confirm what Clementine was saying.

"We gonna do a photo shoot?" Louis asks excitedly.  
"I was just _waiting_  for the day my modelling career would begin."

Clementine shakes her head as Zara chuckles in response, pulling her camera out of her bag.

"We gonna take a picture now?" AJ asks excitedly, seeing the camera in Zaras hands.

"If you want to." Zara replies, looking to Clementine and Louis to see if they wanted to.

"Hell yeah, family photo!" Louis shouts, pulling AJ and Clementine closer, who was silently laughing to herself at the ridiculousness of the situation.  
"James, get over here!"

"Oh, um..." James begins awkwardly, eyes wide.  
"That's okay, I don't really-"

Louis doesn't give him a chance to further deny being in the photo, snagging him by the sleeve of his shirt and pulling him towards them, James nearly falling over as he staggers over from the force of the pull.

"Can you set a timer on that thing?" Louis asks Zara, nodding towards the camera with his head instead of his hands which were otherwise preoccupied; one wrapped around Clementine and the other thrown around James' shoulders.

"No, but it's fine. I'm sure I'll get the chance to be in other pictures" Zara answers, checking something on the camera before raising it to her face, looking at them all through its lens.  
"Say cheese!"

The flash goes off, though its unnecessary in the brightness of the day, only serving to blind all of them with the intensity of the flash. They all wince in response to it, Louis pulling his arm away to rub at his eyes.

"I think... Yep, I no longer have corneas"

Zara chuckles quietly to herself as the photo begins to print, grabbing it from the bottom of the camera before it can drop to the floor. She gently grabs it by the corners, careful not to smudge the photo as she gives the photo a shake to clear it, listening to Louis in the background

"Did I blink? I'm fairly sure I blinked. Blunk? Which one is it?"

"Blinked" AJ informs him, much to Louis's embarrassment.

"And no, you didn't blink" Zara says, giving the photo a last look to check it's ready before handing it over to Louis.

"Hey, this is pretty good!" Louis says with a happy smile, pushing the photo towards Clementine so she can get a better look.

"I wanna see!" AJ complains, jumping to get a look at the photo which Louis was holding too high for him to see.

Louis complies, lowering the photo down slightly for him to get a better look. They are all huddled together, Louis and Clementine side by side with AJ between them, James peering over Louis' shoulder to get a look for himself.

"Been a while since I was in a photo" James says, a small smile on his face.

"I don't think I've ever been in one before." AJ says unsure, looking to Clementine for confirmation.

"No, I don't think you have." Clementine answers somewhat sadly, now beginning to realise how nice it might be to start taking photos of AJ as he grows up.

Louis hands the photo back to Zara for safe keeping, who tucks it away in her bag along with the photo she had taken of Violet the day before. They begin their walk once again, getting closer and closer to the lake.

"If there are walkers still there, do you think you'll be able to draw them away again?" Louis asks James as they walk.

"How exactly do you do that?" Zara also asks, hearing that this was one of James walkers abilities, but no one really explained how it was he did it.

"With this." James answers simply, pulling his walker skin mask and gloves out of his pocket and showing it to Zara, who involuntarily recoiled at the sight of them.  
"Its the easiest way to blend in with them. Let's you walk among them without getting bit."

"I... I don't know whether to be impressed or scared" Zara says truthfully, eying the mask.

"Bit of both" Clementine says, slightly amazed at how unsettling the mask still was to her, even after having worn it.

"As to drawing them away now? Maybe. If there's a few, I should be able to get their attention and lead them away. If there's a lot? Well, a whole herd isn't going to notice one lone walker."

"Its been, what, over a year since we were at the boat?" Louis directs the question to Clementine, who nods at him.  
"Surely the herd would have left by now, right?"

"Maybe. Depends on if there's anything big enough passing by that would attract their attention. Worst case scenario; they're all stuck down there and any straggler walkers passing by were attracted to the sound and joined them. Best case scenario; They all wandered off somewhere else, perhaps into the caves and theres only a few left"

"I mean, there can't be _that_ many left, right?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Well.... Fuck."

Not even AJ pointed out Louis' language, silently agreeing with the statement. They were all peering over a large rock they were using for cover and in front of them was what could only be described as a sea of walkers. They begun on the outskirts of the forest, slowly trickling into the beach where they were packed together like tuna on a can. There were so many of them that they spread out into the lake, a sprinkling of them on the surface with what could be countless others hidden under the cloudy, muddy water of the lake.

"That's a lot" James states the obvious, eyes darting across the clearing to take in the sheer amount of them.

"I'm guessing you can't draw them away?" Clementine asks hopefully, slightly disappointed by the sad look James gives her, shaking his head 'no'.

"There's just too many of them. There's no way they would follow me. Only reason it worked last time is because there was a few of them following at the start, with more joining in as we went. To try and get all of them to follow me... It just wouldn't happen."

"You were right about one thing though" Zara whispers to Clementine, pointing to what she hadn't noticed past all the walkers.

Scattered around the beach were a few crates; some washed up on the sand of the lake side, others pushed up closer to the rocks along the lake side and a few still floating in the water.

"How are we going to get them?" AJ whispers to them, looking worriedly to the walkers.  
"Those crates look really big... How are we going to carry them home?"

"We could use the horse?" Louis offers, turning his head to Clementine as he speaks.  
"We've still got the cage The Delta used, right? We could attach it back to the horse and bring it out here, load up the cage and bring it back home."

"That could work" Clementine agrees, trying to count the numbers of crates she could see through the walkers.  
"Problem is, how are we going to deal with the walkers..."

"We're going to have to kill them, aren't we?" James asks sadly as he observes the walkers milling about the beach.

"What's wrong with that?" Zara asks him, frowning in confusion.

James answers his mouth to answer but instead sighs, giving a small shake of his head and looking back to the walkers.

"I know it's a dangerous way to think, but... I hate seeing life being hurt. All kinds of life."

"And that includes them?" Zara questions, pointing to the walkers.

"Yes" James answers simply, not having the energy to put forward his argument when he knows its pointless.

"There's way too many of them to deal with by ourselves, especially with the limited weapons we have." Clementine tells them.

"What are we going to do then?" Louis asks, fighting off the urge to duck further down and away from all the walkers.

"Who do we know that has plenty of weapons, and people that could help us?" Clementine says to Louis, whose face changes from thoughtful to hopeful as he realises who it could be.

"Nathan?" He guesses correctly

"Yep. We've got that meeting with him in a few weeks, we could ask him for his help."

"Won't he want something in return?" Zara asks

"Well, who's to say we can't trade favors as well as supplies? Nathan's group is always in search of medical supplies, and, thanks to you, we managed to get more than we'll ever need. We offer that to them, on the condition they help us with this."

"You think they'll take it?"

"Won't know unless we ask, right?" Clementine replies, turning her attention back to the walkers in front of them.  
"I'll probably have to start making a plan on how we can take all of these on. It's going to be difficult, even with Nathan's people and his weapons.  
Wish I had a way to note down the details of the place, would make it easier for-"

There's a clicking sound and a familiar flash out of the corner of her eye, and she turns to see Zara with a knowing smirk as she lowers the camera down from her face, pulling the photo out from the camera and handing it over to Clementine.

"You mean like that?"

Clementine takes the photo from her, feeling a tad bit foolish for not realising she could just ask Zara to take a photo of the place for further use in planning.

"Uh, yeah. Guess that'll work..."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the super long break!
> 
> There was barely any time for me to get any writing down while on holiday, and even in the small times there was I was usually too exhausted to do any. 
> 
> Coming back to work has been taxing to say the least, and has definitely had a bit of an effect on my writing, hence why it's taken a bit of time for me to get this chapter done. 
> 
> Apologises for the delay, but hopefully should be getting back into the swing of writing daily again!

Clementine was sat at her desk, a collection of photos from the lake side sprawled out in front of her that Zara had taken. She taps the crayon in her hand against the desk as she thinks, trying to form a plan as to how, with Nathan's help, they might be able to deal with all the walkers with the least amount of risk.

Her eyes are drawn to the forest that was captured in the photo, an idea beginning to form in her head as to how they can use it to their advantage. While it wouldn't be possible to set up traps without the walkers noticing, they might be able to climb up the trees stealthily enough for them not to see or hear. And with Nathan's weapons...

There's a knock on the door, pulling her out of her thoughts. She glances up just as the door swings open, revealing a slightly nervous looking Louis who steps into the room, a smile appearing on his face once he catches sight of her.

"You busy?"

"Kind of" Clementine answers, placing the crayon down on the desk and pushing the photos away from her.  
"Nothing I can't put off for a bit if you need something important."

"Just the pleasure of your company, and I cant think of anything more important" Louis tells her with a sly grin.

She rolls her eyes at him, though is unable to fight off the embarrassed smile that appears on her face. So long as she reacted like that, Louis knew he would never stop giving her such compliments.

"Seriously though, if you're working on something important I'll come back another time" Louis assures her.

"Well, it _is_  important, but I have plenty of time to work on it before we meet with Nathan. What do you need me for?"

Louis loses a bit of his confidence, eyes darting around the room and refusing to look at her in the telltale manner she knows mean he's feeling nervous about something, particularly when he's about to ask her something he's unsure whether she'll agree to.

"I, uh... It's fine if you don't want to, I just thought it would be nice to go out for a walk. We've been so busy and it all just feels so crowded around here, hard to find some time where its just me and you, y'know?"

Clementine doesn't even have a chance to say a single thing before Louis begins to assure her that she doesn't have to go with him.

"You know what, I shouldn't have asked, what you're doing is more important than this-" Louis is stuck in his own head, rambling on as his nerves get the better of him.

Clementine doesn't say a thing, simply standing from the desk and walking over to Louis, who was still rambling in a panic even when she got closer to him. It wasn't until she was right in front of him that he began to stutter over his words.

"A-A--And, you know, you never really know how much time there is to do shit until-"

Clementine silences him with an unexpected kiss, reaching up on her tiptoes to match his height as he was so focused on talking and not expecting the kiss that he hadn't leant his head down. It takes his brain a few shocked minutes to kick in, leaning down slightly so she didn't have to stretch herself to meet him.

Clementine pulls away from the kiss, smirking at the owlish look he gives her, blinking rapidly in shock, still unsure as to whether all that had actually just happened.

"You're right, we don't know how much time we have. That stuff _is_  important, but _you're_ more important to me." She tells him, stepping away from him and making her way towards the exit to the room, stopping in the doorway and looking over her shoulder to Louis who is still stood in the middle of the room in a stunned silence.

"Louis?"

"Yeah?"

"Walk?"

"Right."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The two of them bathe in springs sunlight as they walk through the forest, relaxed but at the same time on high alert, fully aware that there could be danger hidden around every tree and every thick patches of bush that they walk past.

Louis holds Chairles in his right hand, resting the weapon on his shoulder as he walks. Clementime isn't holding a weapon but is still carrying her knife and pistol on her, always close by in case she ever needs to use it.

Their hands brush against eachother every time they take a step, and Louis apprehensively reaches out to take her hand, linking their fingers together. Clementine smiles at how shly he acts towards her in times like these, acting as if they were still barely friends that were dancing around their feelings. He somehow always finds a way to make every thing they do feel like the first time, every time making it feel new and exciting. It never fails to make her heart squeeze in her chest, the realisation smacking her in the face of how much she loves this seemingly overconfident, but secretly self-conscious and emotional boy.

"What gave you the idea for this?" She asks him, giving his hand a squeeze as they walk through the forest.

"What, is a guy not allowed to take his girlfriend out on a romantic stroll?" He responds in ask, shooting her his usual charming smile.

"I suppose" She agrees with a chuckle, looking away from him for a moment to scan the tree line.  
"You never really seem like you want to leave the confinements of the school, so I wasn't expecting you to want to go for a walk"

"What can I say, I like the safety of the walls. But... Its hard to find time and a space where its just me and you, to get to talk just us, like, well, _this."_

"I know what you mean." Clementine says in a sigh.  
"I'm sorry we haven't been able to do things like this. I never expected to be so... _busy."_

"Well then, guess we'll have to arrange more of these" Louis declares, bringing their combined hands up in front of them for a moment before dropping them back down.  
"Even if it's something as simple as a walk, as fun as some batting practice or as fancy as a candle light dinner.

"Yeah" Clementine agrees with a smile.  
"I don't think we have to plan for anything like that. I don't really care what we do. As long as you're there, I'm happy."

Louis blinks in an almost comedic manner before breaking out into a huge smile, throwing his head back and chuckling deeply.

"Damn, you've been picking up on my lines! You nearly made me trip over my own feet there, Clem."

"Or maybe I've been this smooth all along, but never really displayed it."

"Pft, no way" Louis denies with a dismissive hand wave.  
"That line was _clearly_  my style. That's _two_  things you've stolen now."

"Two? What else did I steal?"

"My heart"

"Wow. That was... The cheesiest thing I've ever heard." Clementine tells him truthfully, shaking her head in mock disappointment .

"Ouch. Guess I better up my game, huh?" Louis challenges with a raised eyebrow.

"And how do you plan to do that, exactly?"

"Guess you'll have to wait and see." Louis responds with a shrug of his shoulders and a teasing smirk, knowing that dancing around her questions was beginning to annoy Clementine.

"Wait and see? Does that mean something is happening today?" Clementine asks with a suspicious squint, feeling the need to look all around her for a surprise Louis may have somehow managed to set up whilst out here.

"Yes and no. Depends on your definition of 'something happening'."

"You going to give me anymore information than that?"

"Nope."

Louis stays true to his word, not giving a single other clue as to where they were heading on their walk, despite Clementines subtle attempts to trick him to talking more about it as they walk. She gives up after a while, deciding instead to take the time to enjoy both the scenery she was walking through and the company she was with.

Even though Louis was one of the most talkative people she had ever met in her life (both before the walkers and after), there were still moments where the two of them could fall into a comfortable silence amongst one another. Simply being in his presence had a calming effect, knowing he was nearby and able to talk to in a minutes notice, but still able to just walk in silence side by side for the time being.

Clementine notices the change around them after just under a hour of walking; the trees start to become more sparse, as well as any other bushes and vegetation in the area. She's moments away from asking Louis where they are when something between the trees catches her attention, and makes her wonder if she was seeing what she _thought she_ was seeing.

It was a meadow. A field of vibrant green spring grass stretched out in front of them, sprinkled with a range of colorful flowers that stood out among the sea of green. The springs breeze gently pushed the blades of grass in a wave like formation, making it feel like she was approaching a green ocean.

"When did you find this?" Clementine asks breathlessly on the edge of the meadow, spending a few moments to take in the sight before her.

"Few weeks ago, during a hunting trip." Louis answers, eyes on her instead of the meadow in front of them.  
"Me and Omar got seperated following what we thought might be a deer trail. I was trying to find him and stumbled across this."

Clementine stepped slightly into the grass and reached out a hand to brush against the blades as she walked. The top of the grass was knee height, so she barely had to bend in order to reach it. She stopped at the first flower she came across, bending down to pinch the soft purple petals between her fingers.

"It's beautiful" Clementine tells him, pulling the petal off from the flower and bringing it up close to her face.

"Glad you thought the same." Louis says, stepping up close to her side before taking a seat in the tall grass, nearly disappearing among the blades.  
"I knew I had to bring you out here at some point, just never knew when we would be able to."

"Well, I'm glad you did. It's nice to take a moment to relax."

"In that case, come on." Louis says, placing Chairles down on the ground and patting the spot next to him.   
"Take a seat"

Clementine glances around the meadow apprehensivly when Louis asks her this, something he is quick to pick up on.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure if both of us sitting down is a good idea."

"Uh...why not?"

"This grass is pretty tall, we won't be able to see very well. If a walker comes by..."

"Can you see a walker nearby?"

"No, but-"

"Have you _seen_ any walkers come by the time we've been here?"

"Again, no, but-"

"Then we're fine!" Louis declares, throwing his arms out wide  
"We've both got our weapons, right? Any that come by, we'll take care of them, no problem."

Clementine bit her lip, still unsure as to whether she should accept Louis' invitation, knowing how careless it would be to have both of them unable to see their surroundings. At the same time, the offer was tempting, to just have a few moments to themselves to truly relax.

Louis, running out of patience, made the decision for her. Reaching out a hand from the floor, he grabbed her arm and yanked Clementine down the ground with him, who let out a startled yell at the sudden pull.

Louis clearly didn't think things completly through, as he was in no way prepared for the full weight of Clementine slamming into him after pulling her down. His back hit the ground and all air escaped him in a pained grunt as Clementine squashed his ribs, colliding into his front painfully.

"Shit, you okay?" She asks him worriedly, searching his face for any signs of pain.

"I think so?" Louis responded, shifting around slightly to get into a more comfortable position as he laid on the ground.

"What did you think was going to happen? You're lucky I didn't catch you with my leg" Clementine scolded him

"I mean, yeah, you _could_ have. But you _didn't._ Also, it got you down here, didn't it?"

Clementine huffed, admitting defeat and laying down with Louis in the bed of grass. She used him as her own pillow, resting the back of her head against his chest as they both looked up at the sky, admiring the perfectly fluffy white clouds that passed across the blue sky.

It was another one of those times where they could sit in comfortable silence, watching the world go by. They listened to the sounds of nature all around them, mainly the sounds of birds singing as spring was right around the corner, and they had become much more active. Despite the constant chirping of the birds, it seemed too quiet. That was due, Clementine thought, to the fact that she couldn't hear any walkers. Not a single groan or growl, nothing but the wind blowing by and the bird songs.

"It's oddly peaceful, isn't it?" Louis muses, feeling the rumble of his chest under her head as he speaks.  
"We can pretend like all this shit never happened. Like we're just a couple of kids who snuck out of school to hang out in a field."

"Wouldn't you be out of high school by now?"

"Shhh, don't ruin it."

Clementine laughed lightly at the mild irritation in Louis' voice as he scolded her, turning her head to the side and spotting another flower amongst the blades of grass. She reaches out a hand and pinches the stem of the flower between her fingers, pulling it up and out of the ground before bringing it closer to her face.

She begins to absentmindedly pick at the flowers petals; one by one yanking at the delicate petals, pulling them out and watching as they gently flutter to the ground.

"Are you playing 'He loves me, he loves me not?'" Louis asks as he brings up a hand to cover her own, stopping her from pulling at the flowers petals.  
"Coz you don't need to destroy a perfectly good flower to know that I love you."

"Oh trust me, I know" Clementine assures him, pulling herself into a sitting position and turning to face Louis.

"You pulling a Princess Leia on me, Clem?" Louis asks as he also sits up to pluck the flower from her grip, threading its stem through her hair.

"Who?"

"What do you mean, 'Who?' Leia? Star Wars?"

"Oh, Star Wars... I've never watched them."

"Never-!" Louis spluttered, eyes wide as he grabbed at Clementines arms.  
"You've _never_  watched Star Wars!?"

"... No..."

"I can't believe I'm dating someone who has never watched Star Wars" Louis muttered, laying down dramatically with a big fall.

"Didn't know it was such a big deal breaker for you." Clementine says sarcastically, laying back down on him so the side of her face rested on his chest, the rest of her body slightly curled into his side.

"Hmm. Might have to rethink our whole relationship." Louis jokes, closing his eyes for a moment to take a second to relax.

It was easy to lose track of time like this, laying amongst the soft grass, enjoying the steady warmth of the sun, cooled by the gentle breeze that blew by every now and then. Seconds felt like minutes, and minutes would feel like hours. While Clementine knew they should be spending the time either working or planning for taking on the walkers by the lake, she couldn't find the effort to do so right now, finding a strange sort of peace in listening to Louis' heart beating calm yet strong under her ear.

As time went by, Louis became more fidgety under her. Not much, but subtly every now and then, as if restless. At the same time, she could feel his heart beat increase, going back to its normal rhythm and then increasing again whenever he became fidgety. She would sneak glances up at him in these times, seeing his jaw clench every now and then along with a frown and an irritated huff.

"Okay, what's wrong?" Clementine finally asks, pushing up on his chest into a sitting position.

"What do you mean?" Louis replied with a confused frown, also pushing himself up.

"Somethings on your mind, I can tell."

Louis sighs deeply from his nose, closing his eyes and giving a defeated nod.

"It's... I can't stop thinking about this plan we're making for taking on the walkers. And I'm not complaining, I'm not!" Louis quickly adds when he sees Clementine open her mouth to speak.  
"You said you didn't want me to complain, and I'm not. It's just-"

Louis shaked his head in annoyance, pushing himself up into a standing position and raising a hand to rub at his forehead, dropping his hand back down to his face and chewing nervously at the nail on his thumb.

"It's just what?" Clementine asks, also standing up with Louis and crossing her arms as she watches Louis pace around nervously.

"It's that... I'm scared." Louis admits, finishing his pacing to glance over at Clementine at his admission.

"You're... Scared?"

"Yeah. Terrified, actually."

"Louis... That's a _good_  thing. If you weren't scared, I'd be worried. It's natural to fear for your life, knowing the dangers that you have to face."

"Fear for my life?" Louis questions with a perplexed look.  
"I'm not scared for me! I don't care what happens to me, I'm scared that's somethings going to happen to _you"_

"What?"

"I can't stop thinking about it. One little mistake, one moment you don't see coming and... I _can't_  lose you."

"What makes you think you're going to lose me? I can take care of myself, you know that."

"Yes, I do know that. And that's what I kept telling myself that night after we got off the  bridge, when I left you and AJ behind."

"I told you to do that, you didn't leave us behind."

 _"Yes,_ I did. I never should have done it. I never thought something could happen to you, you seemed... Untouchable. And then AJ brings you back home in a wheelbarrow with blood pouring from your leg and I-"

Louis stopped mid sentence, lifting his head to the sky and shaking his head, blinking rapidly to clear the tears that threatened to form in his eyes.

"I had to watch-" Louis voice wavered as he spoke.  
"-As we _lost you._ You were _gone,_ Clem. Ruby lost your pulse completly, your heart wasn't beating and I thought... That was it. We had lost you forever. Watching Ruby pound at your chest, trying to get you back... I don't think I've ever lost hope like that. It was like... Like who I was died with you. And then when I watched you take that deep breath, it was as if I was coming back to life _with_  you."

It was the first time Louis had fully opened up about what happened to her after her amputation, and now she could see why. Violet was right, seeing how badly it affected Louis just _recounting_  the events of that day, she can't even begin to imagine how truly broken Louis was when it happened.

"So yeah, I'm scared. I don't care what happens to me out there, what happens to me, happens. Do I wanna live through this? Sure, who wouldn't. But if it comes down to me or you, I'm _always_  going to pick you. Always."

 _"Don't"_ Clementine begins sternly, stepping towards Louis with a look of fury, angry enough that Louis had to fight off the urge to step back as she advances towards him.

"Don't you _dare_ say something like that. My life is no more important than yours, you can't say to me that you're prepared to give yours up for mine, and expect me to be fine with that!"

"I can't help how I feel, Clem!" Louis argued back  
"All my life, I've only ever cared about me. Growing up, all I cared about is getting what _I_ want. Even after all this started, I was a coward that was too afraid to do anything that would put me in the line of fire.  
_You_  changed that. You made me see that all this? Everyone back home? You? You're worth risking my life for."

"You can't... You... I can't lose you either!" Clementine spat back.  
"This... This... Low self esteem you have, does it really make you think that I don't feel the same way? That I can listen to you say 'I'm fine with dying, so long as you're safe' and expect me to say 'Yeah, that sounds right!'"

"I-"

"Because that's _n_ _ot_ okay! It's not! I was already scared of the thought of losing you, but now? Hearing you say that?" Clementine continues to argue against him, stepping even closer and grabbing a fistful of his trench coat, scrunching it together under her fingers as she swiftly shakes her head in disagreement.

"Please, Louis. You can't think like that. How would you feel if I said the same thing? Now you've made me shit-scared for this, and I don't know how I can deal with this, Lou, I _can't-"_

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey" Louis interrupts Clementines panicked speech, pulling her towards him and engulfing her in a hug, attempting to calm her as she had started to shake, too overwhelmed by it all.  
"I'm sorry, okay? I'll never stop looking out for you, but I promise I'll do better to keep an eye out for myself, okay?"

"You'll be careful?"

"So long as you are. Actually, You know what?"

"What?" Clementine asks as she pulls her head away from where it was buried to see what he was pointing out. 

"I even pinky promise" Louis answers, lifting his hand out with pinky outstretched, holding it in front of her with a smile.

Clementine weakly smiles in return, shaking her head at him but raising her hand to meet his outstretched pinky none the less.

"You sure you wanna risk your last one?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The heavens had opened that day, releasing torrential buckets of rain down on the whole school. It became impossible to do any of their usual chores both around the school and, even if they could, it wasn't like the downpour of rain put anyone in the mood to actually go outside and _do_ anything anyway.

Not that it mattered to Clementine. She had already been holed up inside for days, working on the plan they were making on wiping out the walkers by the lake side, occasionally calling some of them up to give their own pieces of advice on the manner.

While the chores did become a drag after a while, it did at least keep them occupied. Now, with nothing to do but sit on the desk in the room and follow the trail the water left as it ran down the window pane with her finger, Zara felt like she was about to lose her mind with the boredom she was feeling.

While others found the silence nice (especially, since she's heard from the others, it's rare with Louis around), Zara found the silence to be unsettling. To be dangerous. Without noise, when there was only silence, it was easy to get wrapped up in her own thoughts, stuck down in that deep, dark place they often wander to. And that's exactly where she found herself slipping to as she rested her head against the glass, the only sounds being the muffled rain pounding against the windows, and the increasingly irritating sound of pen scratching against paper.

"Okay!" Zara suddenly declared, making Violet jump out of her skin and drop her pen on the desk, quickly turning in her seat to face Zara.  
"I think I have an idea."

"Okay..." Violet parrots her words, though with far less enthusiasm as she picks the pen up and neatly tucks it away with her journal, turning back to watch Zara scurry around the room, collecting various scraps of paper and pens, along with a empty and slightly moldy cardboard box from the wardrobe.  
"And that is...?"

After unceremoniously dumping all the contents in her arms onto her bed, Zara marched back over to Violet and gently grabbed her by the wrist, tugging her towards the items and nearly tripping over in the process.

"Jeez, what-" Violet begins, reaching out a hand to steady herself on the bed post before lowering herself down onto the bed, careful not to sit on the sprawled items in front of her.

"So, I was thinking... We're roommates now, right?" Zara asks, climbing into the bed to sit opposite her.

"Yeah..."

"And I... I'd like to think we're friends too, right?"

"Oh, uh... Sure?"

"Here's the thing. I feel like you've shared some pretty private things about yourself to me, but at the same time I feel like we don't know all that much about each other, you know? Not just the deep shit but the simple shit."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... For example, what's my favorite color?"

"What?"

"What's my favorite animal?"

"I don't... Know?"

"Exactly! You don't know that about me, and I don't know that about you! Simple shit."

"Okay, but... What's all this for?" Violet asks, waving out a hand towards the supplies in front of her.

"Pretty simple. We tear up the paper into small pieces, write down little questions we'd like the ask eachother on them, then throw them into the box." Zara explains, pointing to the cardboard box leaning by the wall on the bed.  
_"Then,_ we each take turns picking out a question and asking it."

"What if there's a question I don't want to answer?" Violet asks cautiously.

"Well, if you _really_  don't want to, you don't have to." Zara assures her.  
_"But,_ here's the catch. Any question you ask? You _also_  have to answer. That way, any hard hitting questions you ask, you have to be prepared to answer yourself."

"Alright" Violet begins, a small smile forming on her face, feeling the need to rise to the challenge.

"But..." Violet then stops herself, slumping down slightly.  
"I'm not... I'm not exactly the best at reading right now, yknow?"

"Well..." Zara starts, rubbing at her neck nervously.  
"That's kind of why I wanted to do it this way. You mentioned in your diary-"

_"Journal"_

"-Right, in your _j_ _ournal,_ how much it upset you not being able to do the things you usually do now you've partially lost your sight. I know you've been practicing reading lately and you've gotten frustrated at times but... I feel like you've been doing it wrong. "

"Wrong? Wrong how?"

"You've been doing it _alone"_ Zara emphasises, leaning closer slightly to get the words across.  
"Learning to read after going nearly blind, still struggling to see? That's like learning to read all over again. And if a kid is learning how to read, do you just lock them in a room by themselves with a book?"

"No...?"

"No, you wouldn't. Someone else is there to _help_  them. By doing this, not only do we get to know eachother more, but we can also practice your reading. So, what do you say?"

Violet looks to Zaras eager face for a few seconds, slowly reaching across to grab a piece of paper and a pen, bringing it closer to herself and keeping eye contact with Zara as she clicks the pen down.

"Let's do it"

The silence returns once again, though this time the sound of pen against paper isn't as irritating, not when Zara is this focused on the task at hand. The pen glides across the paper as thoughts transition to ink, pausing every now and then and shifting her lower jaw absentmindedly as she thinks of the next question.

It isn't long before the two of them write their final questions, dropping their pens to their sides and beginning the careful process of ripping up the paper without accidentally making a tear through the actual questions. Once finished, they collect the shreds of paper and dump them into the box, giving it a good shake to mix all the questions up inside.

"You ready?" Zara asks Violet, dropping the box down between them.

"Yeah... But uh..." Violet says nervously.  
"You go first."

Zara is more than happy to comply, digging around in the box in front of her without looking. She let's her fingers tighten around a random piece of paper, pulling it out and unfolding it slightly to get a better look.

"Oh, wow." She says with a snort, flipping the piece of paper in her hands towards Violet.  
"How original Violet."

"What? What is it?"

"' _What's your favorite color?'_ Really?"

"You're the one who mentioned it first!" Violet defends herself, snatching the piece of paper from her hands.

"Yeah yeah, fine." Zara admits with a chuckle, leaning back against the bed frame.  
"My favorite color... I'd have to say its green."

"Oh God, please don't go on the spiel I hear everytime about how green is the color of nature and it reminds you of new beginnings and dumb shit like-".

 _"No,_ you asshole." Zara interrupts her with a laugh, resisting the urge to throw the box at her.  
"Greens my favorite color because... My dad had the same color eyes and... It reminds me of him."

"Oh... Were you and your dad close?" Violet asks softly, not knowing such a simple ask would breach such a sensitive subject.

"Yeah. Yeah, we were. Growing up, I was always told that family was the most important thing. I just never realised how true it was until it was taken away from me."

Violet looks to her in sympathy for a moment, able to see how painful it seemed to be for Zara to talk about her dad.

"So, what about you?" Zara asks, breaking Violet out of her thoughts.

"What about me?"

"Your favorite color? Like I said, any question you ask-"

"-Also gotta answer, yeah, right, uh..." Violet interrupts her, gently leaning her head against the bed post behind her as she thinks.

"I'd have to say blue."

"Just because or...?"

"I don't know, I suppose just because" Violet answers, shrugging her shoulders.  
"If you wanted that 'deep personal reason' then I suppose its coz its calming to me. And... Like you, someone I cared about had the same color eyes."

"Do you mind if I ask who?" Zara asked, though she had a sneaking suspicion she already knew the answer.

"Minnie." Violet confirmed her guess.  
"They weren't the color of blue that you think of when 'blue' comes to mind. They were more of a pale blue, but no less colorful, if that makes sense?"

"Yeah, just... A lighter shade?"

"Yeah, like that. Kind of like yours actually, but yours has a deeper shade, a bit more 'traditional blue.'"

"Do... Do they ever remind you of her?"

"No. They did at first but, Not now. Now they're just... Yours."

Zara didn't know how to respond to that, instead deciding the best course of action would be to pick the box up and offer it to Violet, shaking it slightly to get her attention incase she didn't see it. Violets gaze briefly flickers down to the box in front of her before returning her like of sight to Zara, reaching a hand into the box and plucking a new question out.

"Who---Art, no, _Are,_ y--yo---Yeah, this is hopeless." Violet immediately gives up on reading, holding the price of torn paper out to Zara.

"Come on, you barely even tried." Zara reprimanded her, taking the piece of paper from her anyway.  
"I'll read this one, but you've gotta get the next one that's yours."

"Ugh, yes _mom."_

Zara rolled her eyes, looking down to the paper and recognising her own writing staring back at her.

"Oh, no wonder you were struggling, even I can't read my own shitty writing."

"Nah, it's fine, trust me, it's my eyes making it difficult."

"Having to read what can only be described as a child's scribbles can't make it any easier." Zara joked, returning her gaze to the question.  
"Alright, here it is: 'Who are you closest to in the school, and why?'"

"Ooo, we going with the deep stuff now?" Violet said, grinning lazily at Zara.  
"Alright, closest to in the school, uh..."

Violet pauses and chuckles, a small smile on her lips as she thinks of the answer.

"I'm sure if he was here in the room he would act all suprised but...I'd have to say Louis."

"Huh... Somehow that both suprises me and doesn't surprise me"

"What do you mean?"

"Part of me was kinda expecting you to say Clementine."

"Really? Why?"

"I don't know, you guys just seem like really close friends. The two of you always look comfortable around each other."

"Yeah, we are close friends. But... Louis has always been there for me. We didn't really know eachother that well at the school, before the walkers and everything. We were both just too..."

"Different?"

 _"Definitely._  And then all this shit went down, and _everyone_  was terrified. I mean, we were just a bunch of fucking kids, left to die by the adults who tucked tail and ran for themselves."

"Whoa, wait, _all_ the adults just ditched you?"

"Basically. There was one who stayed; our school nurse. But... Yeah, other than that..."

"Wow. What a bunch of dickheads."

"That's a much nicer description than I would use. All of us were terrified, and Louis was no different. He was just as scared as the rest of us. Despite that, he was _always_  smiling, always joking around and trying to get people to play cards and mess around with him. It was annoying at first, and I would always try to push him away. Louis is the kind of guy that sometimes is just... Too much."

"But..."

 _"But,_  the damn guy was like a parasite. Once he grabbed hold of you, he wouldn't let go. I never realised just how much all those jokes, his smile and his constant singing... How much it actually _brightened_ t _he_ day, even when I was telling myself how annoying it was, how annoying _he_ was. I have no doubt we would have all lost our damn minds at this point, if it wasn't for him keeping us all sane."

"Wow...Louis is... He's really a good guy, isn't he?"

"The best." Violet answers sincerely.  
"Honestly, sometimes I don't know how he does it."

"I don't think I've ever seen him truly sad."

"Oh, he has been. He tries not to let it show but... He's human, just like the rest of us. It's kind of scary to see him like that when he is, because you know its something serious to have got him down so much." Violet tells her.  
"I can't imagine how exhausting it must be for him to put on such a happy facade all the time. Or maybe he's so used to it by now it's just because his default. Still, all of that, going through the effort to keep everyone smiling? It's because he truly, _genuinely_ cares about everyone here. It's one of his biggest weaknesses really, how much he cares for us. Sometimes, I worry its what's going to get him killed."

"I can see that." Zara comments quietly.  
"The way he acts around Clementine... I can see him diving headfirst into danger to keep her safe, without a second thought."

Violet hums in agreement, turning her gaze away from the game to the window for a slight second, chewing on her bottom lip thoughtfully before looking back to Zara.

"Your turn to answer now, right? Who are you closest to in the school?"

"You" Zara answers without second thought, getting a shocked and slow blink as a response from Violet.

"Me?"

"I mean, who else was I going to pick?" Zara replies with a slightly sarcastic laugh.  
"Louis is a nice enough guy and all, but... I'm never really able to form close enough friendships with guys anymore, not since..."

Zara pauses for a moment, her eyes flickering over to Violet who had raised her eyebrows at the use of 'since', leaning forward slightly in anticipation. Zara kept her eyes on Violet for a split second before averting her sight back down to the bed, swallowing nervously and shaking her head.

"Same goes to James with that, I mean he saved my life and I'll always be appreciative of that but... The guys pretty quiet, keeps to himself.  
AJ's a pretty cool little dude but, not much you can have in common with a seven year old.  
The others... I don't know. I like them of course, but I just don't feel like I've gotten to know them enough yet. Maybe that'll change in time but... Yeah."

"What about Clementine? You guys seemed to be getting along okay?"

"Oh, we are. I would definitely count Clem as a good friend to me. Did save her life after all, and she saved mine by letting me stay. Still though... Its... I don't know, I just feel _closer_  to you, y'know?"

"Oh..." Violet murmured quietly, leaning back against the bed frame.  
"Now I feel like you wrote that question to make me feel like an asshole."

"I'm sorry?" Zara questioned with a slight chuckle at the unexpected response.

"You _clearly_  knew that was going to be your answer when you wrote the question. Here I go, talking on and on about how Louis is my best friend only for you to turn around and say _im_  the person you feel closest to in the school. So now, I feel like a dick."

"Nah, don't feel like that. Trust me, I wasn't thinking you'd pick me in the least. I knew it would be someone else from the school, just didn't know who."  
Zara assures her, pushing herself forward slightly to reach the box, pulling out another piece of paper for the next question.

"Okay, let's see here...Seems like one of yours, again" Zara mutters quietly under her breath as she reads.  
"Oh... Going deep here... 'What's your biggest regret' ... Huh..."

Violet could hear the uncertainty in Zaras voice as she finished the sentence, seeing the slight nervous shaking of her hands as she folded the paper up in her hands, slowly running her hands along the folded edges.

"Hey, if you don't want to-"

"No, no, it's fine. I can do it. Just, uh..." Zara stops to clear her throat anxiously, still fiddling with the piece of paper on her hands.

"I can go first, if you want" Violet offers, ducking her head slightly to look at Zara as her head was slightly bowed down.  
"I don't mind."

"Sure... Yeah, okay. That'll give me a minute to..." Zara clears her throat once again, taking a deep breath as she straightens back up, going into a more relaxed position as she nodded at Violet.  
" S'long as you're good to go... 'What's your biggest regret?' "

The answer to this question was easy for Violet. Well, not _easy,_ as in easy to talk about like it was no problem. More like, it was something she had thought about a lot. Obsessed over, really. The biggest regret she had, one that she wondered might have gone differently...

"There's a lot of shit thats gone wrong, things that I regret. But... The thing is, a lot of those, those that happened recently? They all seemed to have come from a starting source... And I feel like this starting source, the things that's my biggest regret? I feel like it had a sort of domino effect, that one seemingly small fuck up could lead to everything going wrong in my life."

Violet had grasped Zaras full attention, still in her relaxed positon but no less enthralled with what she was hearing, keeping quiet with her eyes trained on Violet as she spoke.

"A couple of years ago, things were normal. As normal as can be, anyway. I had been assigned scavenging duty that day with the twins and Marlon, but... I wanted to work in the greenhouse that day. So, I asked Brody if she would cover for me. And she did."

"Im sorry, the twins?"

"Shit, right, of course. Uh, Minnie? She had a twin sister, Sophie."

"Oh, okay. So, you were in the greenhouse instead that day."

"Yeah... Like I said, everything was normal. Day went by as it usually did, I was so wrapped up in what I was doing that I didn't realise it had started to get late and they hadn't come back yet. Didn't have the slightest of clue that something was off until Marlon and Brody came through those gates, in tears and shaking uncontrollably. "

"Just them? Where was-"

"Something went wrong on the trip. It took a while for Marlon to get the words out, but... He told us they were caught by surprise by some walkers. They made it out, Minnie and Sophie didn't."

Zara lets out a breath of air she didn't know she was holding at this, letting her head fall back against the wall behind her. But... Something didn't add up. She could recall Violet mentioning Minnie before, how they has thought she had died, but hadn't. Was this...?

"Turns out, Marlon and Brody were lying." Violet answers Zaras quizitive look.  
"For a whole year, Marlon scared Brody into hiding the truth."

"What truth?"

"They never ran across walkers. They actually ran across a group of raiders, called themselves-"

"The Delta." Zara interrupts in realisation, recalling their previous conversation about this group at dinner the other night.

"Yep. They threatened Marlon with attacking the school, so Marlon just... He fucking gave the twins up, to keep his ass safe. For a whole _year_  he watched me grieve, watched me break and he was so scared for himself that he never had the balls to admit what he had done."

"Holy fuck..." Zara uttered quietly to herself.

"It wasn't until Clementine arrived that we found out the truth. Marlon, he had...Some bad anger issues. Clementine had caught Brody and Marlon down in the basement talking about the raiders and Brody admitted to Clem what they had done. Marlon lost his shit and... He killed Brody. "

"No... " Zara whispered in horror.

"It didn't seem like he _meant_  to. That's what Clementine said, anyway. When he got in those kind of anger fits, he wouldn't really _think,_ would instead act on impulse. Anger and fear, they drove him to do some scary shit. So, knowing what he had done, he apparently decided the best course of action would be to lock Clem up and blame it on her. "

"Blame it on-" Zara spluttered in disbelief, wide eyed at what she was hearing.  
"Jesus..."

"I don't know how much you read of my journal... About what AJ did..."

"What do you-" Zara began, though her mouth quickly dropped open when she realised.  
"AJ shooting Marlon... _That_ _'s_ why he did it?"

Violet nodded

"After that, everything all just sort of... Happened. The shit with the raiders, then coming back to attack us, us trying to defend ourselves, losing Mitch, some of us being taken away and in the daring rescue attempt..."

Violet stopped to point at her bandage covered eye, giving Zara time to look to what she was pointing at before dropping her hand back down.

"Boom. Bomb goes off and everything goes dark. When I wake up, it's still dark. We finally get home and I learn all in one go that not only did we lose Minnie, but we... We lost Tenn, too."

"God..."

"In the space of about a month, everything got flipped on its head. And all of that shit happening, sometimes I think... Could I have changed it?"

"I... I don't think you could. I don't see a way that you could have." 

"What if I never asked to work the greenhouse that day? What if I had just done what I was supposed to, and gone with Marlon and the twins? Maybe I could have stopped Marlon from making that deal. Maybe, by just being there, we would have walked a different path, at a different time, and never come across those raiders?"

"I suppose that there's a possibility of things changing. But..."

"If I had just made that one change, maybe all those we had lost would still be here. Marlon, Brody, Mitch, Minnie, Sophie and Tenn. Maybe I never would have ended up on that boat, would never have lost my vision.  
At the same time, I can't help but think, maybe it could have ended up worse? If we never ran across the raiders, we would have never found out about them, would never be prepared when they attacked. Would we still have met Clementine and AJ, if we had taken that same route? And if we had never met them, would never have met James, who, maybe, might never have saved you and brought you here?"

"Butterfly effect" Zara murmured.

"And still, I think, what if all that still happened... We still had Clementine and AJ, still had you and James. But... Also had Marlon and Brody? Still had Mitch, and Tenn, and Sophie and Minnie? If maybe, just maybe, if I hadn't switched duties that day. So yeah. Taking the greenhouse shift? That would be my biggest regret."

"That's... A good answer."

"Not sure if I'd call it 'good', but it's the only answer I got." Violet shifted her position on the bed, stretching her legs out in front of her.

"Thank you for sharing it with me, either way. I know it's not easy to talk about these kinds of things. Which, is probably why I'm stalling." Zara ended her sentence in a breathy laugh, tucking a few loose strands of hair behind her ears as she tucked her legs underneath her.  
"It's actually kinda weird. What I'm trying to tell you, I've told to Clementine already."

"Oh? Well, if it makes you feel any better about it, she hasn't breathed a word of it to us."

"That's good to hear. Even though I can't see her spilling my personal secrets like that." Zara joked once again.  
"I don't know, its odd. Clems like... Really good at getting you to talk. Somehow had the right words and ways to get me to spill my inner most secrets to her."

"Ah, yes. Good ol' emotional interrogation."

"Scares me to think of what she would be like with _physical_  interrogation."

"I believe they call that ' _torture.'"_ Violet quips, getting a chuckle out of Zara that makes her quick to join in with her own.

"Whatever it was, it worked. Talking to Clem about it came easy but for some reason... There's something stopping me from telling you about it. Almost like... I don't know, you'll judge me or something."

"Remember what we said; you don't _have_  to say anything. If this is a no go for you, then don't force yourself. Just know that if you do decide to talk about it, there will be no judgement from me. Believe me, I've grown up my whole life fearing judgement from others. There's no way I'd inflict that same kind of thing onto you."

Zara sucked in a deep breath through her nose, pausing with a lungful of air as she let Violets words circulate her head before puffing the breath back out of her nose, nodding to Violet.

"Okay, I'm... I'm just going to keep this simple, and to the point. My biggest regret... Would be waiting so long to tell my dad I was being raped."

Violet tried not to show any sign of a reaction, but really, there's no way to prepare yourself for hearing such a thing. Her head recoiled back as the words sunk in, feeling herself take a sharp inhale of air through her teeth and bring a hand up to her chest, fingers unconsciously curling into the skin, feeling the pinch of her nails bite into her skin through her shirt.

"Oh my God... You were?"

"For about four years."

' _I'm going to be sick_ ' Is what Violet wanted to say, but knew it wouldn't be something Zara wanted to hear.

"I could never bring myself to tell my dad. I was too scared that something might happen, maybe us being kicked out of our home? Maybe they would kill me for telling, kill my dad for knowing? I couldn't put my dad through that, not after all the shit he had to out through just to keep _me_  alive."

"But...You told him eventually, right?"

 _"Told_ isn't the right word. Instead he... Caught one of them while they were...  
Like you said, that one moment that seemed to set off every other shit thing that happened to you? I felt like that was the moment."

"Same kind of thing?"

"Mm-hmm. Again, it turns into a game of 'what-ifs?'. If I told him earlier instead of him having to see it for himself, would he have handled it differently? Would he have stopped himself from knocking that guy out? Would he have stopped himself from slitting our leaders throat? Would we have still been living comfortably in that camp, instead of constantly being out on the run? Would we have left on our own accord, not to be hunted down by our former group members? Would I still have my dad here today, and not have to had watched his throat be slit in return?"

"God, Zara, I-"

"Like you said, maybe things would be better. Maybe they would be worse. But if it meant getting my dad back? If me refusing to tell him what was happening was what had got him killed? If all that was true, then I'd have to say doing that was _m_ _y_  biggest regret."

Zaras eyes had slowly been filling with tears as she recounted her story, though able to hold them back from slipping down her face. She was unable to meet Violets gaze throughout the whole speech, instead choosing to look down at the bed covers, at the wall, anywhere that wasn't Violet as she spoke. Now with the story over, she brought up a hand to wipe away at the tears, clearing them from her eyes before it became too difficult to keep them from falling.

"Why would you think I would judge you for that?" Violet managed to ask after a few moments of shocked silence.  
"There was _n_ _othing_ in that story that would have me judging you, nothing that could have possible been your fault."

"I know, I know, it's stupid. Doesn't stop me from thinking it, though."

It was odd, the silence that she earlier found unsettling was now a more welcome addition to the atmosphere as the two of them sat there, neither knowing what to say after sharing such hidden, usually kept hidden away and locked tight thoughts. The pitter patter of the rain hitting the glass was actually quite soothing, a distraction, something to focus on.

"So now that we've shared our deppest darkest secrets are we like, bonded for life?"

Zara snorted at Violets attempt to both break the silence and the tension, giving a shrug of her shoulders in response.

"Dunno. I'd say so, though. After all, I can't think of anything better to bond over someone with then some good ol' trauma."

"Well, if that's the case, I'd say we probably have enough trauma between us to keep us going for the rest of our lives."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

TWO WEEKS LATER 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Zara frowned in concentration, sitting on her bed with her guitar resting on her lap as she plucked at its strings, frowning at the out-of-tune sound it made. It was desperately in need of a tuning, but truth be told, she had absolutely no idea how to do it. She had _some_ idea of what the notes were _supposed_  to sound like, but wasn't entirely certain. She could always ask Louis for his help, since he was the only other musician in the school. Then again, his expertise was with piano and not guitar, and so he probably knew as little as she did.

She plucks the strings once more, cursing quietly when she finds another string out of tune. The door to the bedroom swings open, and she gives a quick glance to the door to see Violet entering the room with a concerned look.

"Hey, what's up?" Zara asks as she returns her focus to the guitar

"That's you playing? Oh thank God, I thought someone was beating a cat to death with a guitar" Violet teases mercilessly, trying to hide her teasing smile as she closes the door behind her.

"Fuck you" Zara says in a laughing manner, fiddling with the tuners to try and change the note to the right one.  
"I'm not _playing,_ I'm tuning. I'm trying to make it so it _d_ _oesn't_  sound like I'm beating a cat to death with it."

"That would make sense _if_  your playing didn't sound like that all the time."

"Wow. Just... Wow. What did I ever do to deserve such mean words?"

"Mostly because I have a whole day of hunting with Louis tomorrow in which a) I have to get up at ass o' clock in the morning for and b) I will be forced to listen to Louis blabber on for the _entire day_.

"And that's my fault because...?"

"It's not really, I'm just projecting my anger. And its also kinda the fact that I'm going to have to wake up to see you snoozing away, not having to get up so damn early for whatever it is you have to do tomorrow."

"You know what's even worse?"

"What?"

"I don't have _any_ duties tomorrow. Free day." Zara teased, placing the guitar down beside the bed, keeping it leant against the wall.

"Ugh, you _suck"_ Violet complains, flopping down onto her bed with a dramatic sigh.

"I was going to make an inappropriate joke there, but I'm sure you'll hear plenty from Louis tomorrow"

The last thing Zara saw before tucking herself into bed for a good night's rest was Violet rather rudely giving her the middle finger.

When she awakes the next morning, it's clear that it's still early as the sun wasn't all that high in the sky. Despite this, she had awoken to an empty bed opposite her, Violet clearly having left for her day of hunting with Louis. Seems she wasn't exaggerating, she really _d_ _id_ have to get up early for it. She was sure that if she concentrated really hard, she could feel Violets eyeroll right now from wherever she was, responding to whatever joke Louis would most likely be giving.

Now that she was awake, Zara found herself pondering what to do with a day free from duties. Though she had done her best to make Violet jealous about having the day off, truthfully, she didn't like it all that much. It was one of those weird things where the entire time you're working, all you can think about is having time off, to be relaxing and doing whatever you want. And then, when you _do_  have that time off, it usually ends up being boring. This was her problem now, not knowing what to do with herself for the whole day.

Everyone was out doing _something_  today, which left very little options in something as simple as going to chat with someone. Of course, Clementine was here, working on their walker plan as she had been for the past few weeks. Clementine had been spending more and more time keeping to herself as she worked on the plan the closer it got to their usual meeting date with the caravan group Zara had heard only little about. She didn't want to interrupt Clementine from her work and, while she could always offer her own input on the plan, Clementine seemed more like the kind of leader who liked doing things their own way, so she was sure she'd appreciate her keeping out of it more than what little assistance she can provide.

Zaras eyes scan across the room, looking for something, _anything_  she could entertain herself with. Her eyes land on the guitar for a brief second, though she eventually decides she doesn't have the effort in her to continue with her tuning. So instead she returns to searching around the room. She's about to give up and just head outside when a familiar book catches her eye, laid out on the desk from where it was used the previous day.

Zara moves closer to the desk against the wall, taking a seat on the creaky wooden chair and pulling Violets journal closer to her. She has her fingers pressed across the edges of the pages when something stops her.

Was this an invasion of privacy? It felt like it was, to go reading through the book. Then again, it was Violet who gave her permission to read it in the first place to get to know her better, but she just couldn't shrug off the feeling that was stepping over a boundary by reading it. Just as she did the first time she had read it, even with Violet in the room, seconds after giving her permission for the go ahead.

She's unable to stop the doubts forming in her mind, in a constant battle against the never ending urge she had been feeling to read more of what was in the journal. Violet had told her to read the book, and she only read a few sections, meaning there was plenty more to read, plenty more that maybe Violet _wanted_  her to read? And yet, at the same time, things might have changed. She had seen her writing new parts into the journal, and maybe she didn't want her reading _those_  ones?

The battle goes on in her head as she remains seated at the desk, eyes darting over to the closed door next to her and then back to the book, slowly sliding her index finger slightly down the edges of the pages, stopping just before the bottom.

There's a beat.

She flips the book open.


	10. Chapter 10

_Where to start?_

That was the question. Does she go straight to the new entries, see what's Violets state of mind is recently? Or does she start back at the beginning, carry on near where she left off and make her way towards the newer ones?

With a day of nothing to do ahead of her, Zara figures she might as well flip the pages to the older entries and make her way to the newer ones.

_'Today's been...An odd day, to say the least. I've been feeling off the whole day already, not too sure why. Wasn't phasing me all too much until something weird happened, weird enough that right after it happened, I came here to write it down._

_It's been a few weeks since the boat rescue, and things have been going back to normal, for the most part. Everyone's certainly in a much better mood now that Clementine is awake again and on the mend. Especially after that scare we had, when AJ brought her back..._

_I suppose the reason I've been feeling off today is because everything's gone back to normal. Which, I know, sounds weird. But it's like... Everyone's carrying on as normal, except for me. Even Clementine is up and about, determined to do everything she can despite the fact she's recovering from losing her damn leg. Then here's me; struggling to do the simplest of tasks by myself. I think that, deep down, I know it will never go back to normal for me, and today I seem to be stuck in that rut._

_Thats not even part of why I'm writing this. Not the reason I shot out of my seat and went searching for this book._  
_Everything was normal. I was sat next to Omar, having a perfectly fine conversation and then I saw Louis and Clem out of the corner of my eye. Louis and AJ had only recently come back from this scouting mission Clementine had been worried about for some time and she was... I dunno, fussing over him?_

_I suppose she was just all panicked about something going wrong and all that but I just sat there and watched as she was talking to him, looking him all over and patting him down for anything wrong and Louis was just... Laughing at it all, giggling really and he was just really happy about it? As in yeah, sure he was finding it funny but I could tell he was also just laughing out of happiness. Usually I see that kind of relationship shit with Aasim and Ruby and I don't really think about it that much, a bit too much if you ask me. But it wasn't until I saw Louis wrap her up in a hug to stop her from fretting any more, and listen to them collapse into giggles together that I felt something... Odd._

_I was jealous. There's no doubt about it. All of a sudden, these awful things are entering my head. That it should have been me wrapping Clem up in that hug. That if I had manned up and talked to Clem when I first started to realise I liked her, that I would be in Louis' place, that I would be happy._

_It took me by surprise to say the least. I had even had a conversation with Clem just earlier today, about how I liked her. 'Liked' being the key word here. Or, so I thought. I thought I had gotten over it, that how her and Louis were happily together, that I had moved on. Now, seeing them together, it's brought all these feelings back, along with some that I'd much rather not have._

_I shouldn't feel this way. I know we're constantly told that 'you can't help how you feel' but this is wrong. I should be happy for them, and I am, I really am. But it doesn't stop me from wishing I was in Louis' place... And he doesn't deserve that. Doesn't deserve me wishing he wasn't as happy as he was, wishing I could replace him. Clem makes him happy, and he really does deserve that, that and so much more._

_Maybe these feeling won't last. Maybe I'm just feeling a little bit, I dunno, extra sensitive or extra emotional as of late? Seeing Minnie again after a whole year, losing her, losing Tenn, having Lilly fuck with my head... I just need some time to heal properly, get my head in the right place and then surely, hopefully, these feelings will go away.'_

It was... A lot to unpack. Sure, she knew Violet and Clementine had been close but... Not _that_  close. Violet liking Clementine?

But... What about now? This entry was more than a year ago, and things certainly could have changed. Violet and Clem always seemed like good friends, and while she supposed it was possible Violet was still holding onto those feelings, it seemed more likely that she would have moved on by this point.

Maybe... Maybe if she skipped forward to now in the journal, maybe she'd get her answer.

She doesn't have much time to think about it, fingers already flipping through the pages until she reaches a more recent entry of Violets, eyes glued to the words on the page as she reads.

_'There's too many damn times in my life where someone who we have a cross for has come back to life, and honestly that should be more often when you're in the goddamn walker apocalypse, though I'm not too sure if that counts as 'life'._

_There was a guy, James, who Clementine met with not long after she had that encounter with Lilly and that raider, not long after we kicked her out..._  
_We didn't know much about him, other than the fact that he saved Clem and AJ from the raiders, and that he helped keep AJ alive after he was shot._  
_Oh, and the fact that the dude wore a mask made out of walker skin. Can't forget about that part._

_Apparently, he had a pretty big role in helping to save us from Lilly. From what I hear, it wouldnt have been possible without him. I never met the guy personally, seemed like a weird dude, from what Clementine told me. I think that she thought that, too. Still, seems like James was Clementines friend, and Clementine seems damn certain he's dead, and she was quite broke up about it. Built him a cross and everything to go in the graveyard._

_Like I said, didn't know the guy, but from what I can tell, I wouldn't be here without him, so of course I'll pay my respects every time I pass by his cross._

_At least, I would have, if it wasn't for the fact that the guy walked back through our gates just yesterday._

_And if that wasn't weird enough, he's carrying a half dead girl with him who looks completely out of it. As you can imagine, it all became a bit of a rush of trying to keep her alive, but then... Well, I was quite taken aback when I heard Clementine and Louis fighting, only to find out that Clementine was unsure as to whether we should even be helping her.-'_

This was news to her. She definitely wasn't _expecting_  anyone to help her, which is why she was so grateful for Clementine for saving her. To hear that Clementine was at one point hesitating over the decision at one point, whole expected, did nothing to lessen the blow.

_'-Theres been times where I've questioned some of Clems decisions, but they usually end up right. Or, at least fine. Survivable. And so I've always backed her when it came to it. But this? This was one I couldn't. Trust me, I understand that medicine is a rare resource, but the thought of leaving her to possibly die seemed plain wrong._

_Thankfully, both me and Louis were on the same page. It didn't take us long to convince Clem to keep helping this girl but... What Clem said has been stuck in my head. How in the hell did this girl get those injuries in the first place? They certainly look purposefully painful, and I can't help but feel that a person would only want to do that to you if you managed to royally piss them off. Still, there are some sickos in this world after all, so it would in no way surprise me if someone had done this to her for no reason. Fucking psychos out there...'_

Huh. For some reason, she had never really thought to read Violets journal entries that included her in it, to find out how Violet really felt about her. It wasnt like Violet wouldn't want her reading about her own sections, as she did offer her the journal to read _a_ _fter_ she had met her, and so surely would have already written some about her at that point.

It was strangely... Addicting. Having access to someones thoughts, someone's  _true_ thoughts in this way. To know how a person really feels and thinks, no restrictions and no barriers that people usually put up to block out the true meaning behind their words, whether consciously or subconsciously.

Zara flicks the page over to the next entry, folding the paper down carefully and beginning to read.

_'She woke up. It's amazing how much better a person looks when they're not covered in blood. Even covered in bandages is a much better look than blood. Hopefully the bruises start to go down and we can get a better look at the girl underneath._

_I volunteered to look over her for when she wakes up, and of course its the time where I'm not paying full attention. She scared me as much as I scared her._  
_Well, she startled me. I think I truly scared her._  
_Not that I blame her, of course. I think if be terrified too if I woke up sore as hell, in a place I didn't recognise, tied up to a bed that's not mine and being watched by someone with gauze covering half their face. Yeah, poor girl must have felt like she was in some kind of horror movie._

_She reacted kind of like a wounded dog after she woke up. She backed herself into a corner, but seemed ready to lash out at a moments notice if it came to it, if she had to defend herself._  
_Was quite taken aback by the anger I felt. Not at her, but of whatever these assholes did to her. I know, I know I don't have the full story and she could secretly be a murderer or something but... God, to see her cower away the way she did, so clearly in pain and so afraid, I can't help but wonder what kind of monster could do such a thing._

_Got her name, at least. Zara. Unusual name, kind of like mine is. Nice, though. From the limited conversation weve had, she seems... Intriguing, to say the least. It was nice to see her start to warm up to me, and I hope I was repaying the favor. Never was much of a people person._

_I mean, she went from backing away from me to saying my name was 'pretty'. Hell, she even called me pretty which, I don't really know what shes taking about since she can't actually see half my face, and the half you can see is a barely healed charred mess with one slightly working, paled over eye but then again, she did blame it on the blood loss so I guess I'll have to chalk it up to that._

_It was nice to hear, though. Louis is always peppering me with compliments to try and put me in a better mood, but it never really works coming from him, since I know its the reason he's saying them. So to hear a compliment from someone else is both a shock to the system and is, well... I hate to repeat myself, but it really was nice to hear.'_

Does... Does Violet really not get compliments all that often? And to hear her talk about herself that way, to think she wasn't worthy of such compliments...  
Zara makes a note in the back of her mind to compliment Violet more often, before flipping to another section.

_'So... Had another panic attack today. Which was fun. Sometimes I have days where my sight is worse than usual, and today was a bad one. Its hard enough waking up every morning with blurred vision while the other is seemingly turned off, so I nearly threw up from the fear when I woke up and both weren't working._

_Before you think it, no, it wasn't dark in the room. I could hear the others out in the courtyard, so it was already daylight. I thought that that was it, that my vision was finally gone for good. Everything went into shut down mode and I just laid in bed, staring up at the ceiling for god knows how long when, after some time, things slowly started to come back into as much focus as my eye is able to do._

_I should have been relieved but... I wasn't. Couldnt stop thinking about how, even with the limited vision I have, I still cant do shit. And I'm fed up with this constant argument in my head, but I can't help it. I was feeling so overwhelmed and just wanted to escape, but how could I? I can't go outside the school walls without help, and I definitely didn't want to see anyone at that point._

_Thinking of escaping only made me think about the one place I used to go to where I could, in some way, escape. Thinking of it only makes me feel worse though, as I can't even go there anymore because of, you guessed it, my fucked up eyes._

_There's no way of me climbing the belltower anymore. No way of doing it without slipping off and breaking my neck. It's hard enough walking up normal stairs, and the tower doesn't even have those anymore. There is literally no way I would be able to climb it, no way I would be able to know where the out cropping of stones are for me to climb without being able to see where they are and where I'm going, where I'm placing my feet and arms._

_Knowing that I can never go there again, it just... It just makes me wish I had taken advantage of it more. That, the last time I went up there, I had appreciated every single second I had. What I wouldn't give, to go up there just one more time..._

_No use on living on false hope though, right?'_

The bell tower... Zara had walked past it numerous times, but had never even considered climbing it. Seeing how high up it was, she could see how Violet used it as her way of "escaping" everyone else.

She had seen the state the tower was in and yeah, she had to agree with Violet there, there was _no_  way she would be able to get up there again without her sight. Giving Violet back her sight was, of course, impossible, but _surely_  there was some way of getting Violet back up there again, even if it was one last time?

Zara adds the thought as another one to come back to in the back of her mind, flipping to one of the most recent entries of Violets and stating to read.

' _Okay, so I might be freaking out here. Just a little. Okay, a lot. But I think I have the right to._

_I don't really know what's happening, other than the fact that somethings been...changing. Something with me. And something with Zara.'_

Zara pauses, eyebrow raising at seeing her name. Something changed? Something with her and Violet? Something that was making Violet freak out over?

_'I don't know why it's changed, or even how, it just sort of happened. It reminds me all too much of what happened with Clementine, and at the same time is so very different, and both of that scare me._

_With Clem it was like... I dunno, I was a lot more conflicted. I was still mourning for Minnie and so when Clementine came to us, it was... Look, we weren't best of friends right at the beginning. I was, quite frankly, always in a pissy mood and having so many walkers attracted to us after Clem crashed her car and having my first meeting with AJ be him shouting at me definitely did not help improve my mood towards Clementine. And yet, in this pissy mood I felt towards her, I was still attracted to her._

_Didn't pay it much attention at first, but after getting to know her better and spending nearly two weeks together planning on how to defend against the raiders there was suddenly all these... Feelings. And they felt wrong. As if having these feelings was like I was forgetting about Minnie, and I could never do that. Trying to repress them didn't work and when I finally have up and tried to confess to her, Louis beat me to it._

_I held onto my sourness over that for quite some time. I didn't realise I had let go of it until recently._

_The first time I saw Zara, I didn't really think much about her specifically, other than the general "holy shit she's covered in blood is she going to die" which, in my defence, she honestly looked like she was._

_Even after she woke up, I didn't think much about it. Too busy wondering if she was secretly a psycho of some sort. And then, she starts giving me these compliments and I start to feel... Something? It was barely there, and I chalked it down to embarrassment and moved on._

_And then, last night during the thunder storm, we played a game. Zara was the one to suggest it and hey, I was bored, so why not. Seemed harmless, a little question game to get to know eachother better. Easy peasy._

_Wasnt expecting for us to spill our darkest secrets to one another. That's one way to get closer to eachother, that's for sure. You'd expect after recounting such horrible things youd be in a pretty bad mood and yeah, we kinda were, but... Somehow she got us laughing again, like it was no problem._

_And I'm just sat there. I'm sat there, watching her laughing and suddenly it hits me. I think "Oh, that's why. That's what those feelings are."_

_Now? I don't know what to do. Telling her seems next to impossible, but I've learnt from the past that keeping it bottled in is never a good thing._

_I don't know what to do. I never expected for this, for me to realise that those feelings were that I actually like Zara, to know that-'_

Zara slams the book shut, pushing it back on the desk and quickly leaning back against her chair, feeling like her mind had been fried.

That... That was something she definitely was _not_  meant to read. Something that was clearly private, and only for Violet to see and know.

Violet liked... _her_? No, surely she hasn't read that right. Violet was her friend and, from what she could tell, Violet had given no signs of being interested before. It all just seemed... Impossible.

The sound of the door handle turning nearly gives her a heart attack, startling out of her seat and looking over to the opening door. She has no time to do a single thing before Willy enters the room, who also startles upon seeing her.

"Oh, sorry!" Willy is quick to apologise.  
"I was looking for Violet."

"Oh, uh... Violet has a hunting trip with Louis today?" Zara gets our shakily, waiting for the sudden adrenalineto wear off, and for her heart to calm down.

"Ah shit, I forgot about that. Guess I'll...-"  
Willy begins to back out of the door but stops when he gets a good look at Zara, stepping back into the room with a frown.  
"Hey, you okay?"

"Me? Why wouldnt I be okay?"

"You look super pale,  like you've seen a ghost."

"Ah, no, I'm fine. Just, uh..." Zara trails off, trying to think of an excuse.  
"Was reading a book... A horror book."

"Oh...yeah, Ive never really tried them. Prefer comics over a whole book..."

"Well, it's uh... They're good. You should give it a shot." Zara says somewhat awkwardly, thankful that Willy seemed to accept her excuse.  
"So, what did you need Violet for?"

"She borrowed a screwdriver a few days back, I think she was trying to fix one of the hinges on your door?"

"Yeah, she was. She _h_ _as_. You need it back or something?"

"Sure do. You happen to know where it is?"

Zara doesn't answer him, instead walking over to the nearby wall closet and pulling one of the boxes down she had seen Violet store the screwdriver in, rummaging through until she finds what she's looking for.

She passes over the screwdriver to Willy, who seems to light up upon being reunited with his screwdriver.

"Thanks, Zara! Theres a little project I've been wanting to work on for a while that I needed this for..." Willy rattles on as he begins to make his way out of the room.

Seeing the screwdriver in his hand reminds Zara of how Willy was the only groups handyman and crafter, sparking an idea in her head.

"Hey, Willy?" Zara calls our after him, smiling thankfully when his head pops back round the door frame

"Yeah?"

"You busy at the moment?"

"Few things I'm working on at the moment but nothing too major...why?" Willy asks, tilting his head in curiosity.

"There's something I wanted your opinion on."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"HALT!"

"Oh here we go again..." Louis mumbles under his breath, stopping in his tracks and raising his hands in the air along with everyone else, as they had gotten used to every single time they met up with Nathan. Well, all of them but James and Aasim was, who were only ready to put their hands in the air after receiving the warning from Clementine and Louis before they set out.

"Wait, they don't do this _all_  the time, do they?" Aasim asks anxiously, starting to regret agreeing to going to one of these trades.

"You have no idea..." Louis continues to mumble, though immediately shifts his expression to a beaming grin once one of Nathan's men approaches them.

"Hey, Alex. Good to see you. How's the wife, how's the kids?" Louis jokes as he starts to get patted down.

"I'm not Alex." He responds in a gruff tone, standing up as he finishes with his search, seemingly satisfied.  
"I'm Jack."

"Wait, but I could have sworn you were..."

"I'm Alex." A voice comes from behind him, nearly making him jump out of his skin. He sees Alex come into his vision from the corner of his eyes, walking over to Jack and standing next to him, waiting for their next orders.

"Clementine! Louis! AJ!" Nathan yells in delight once he sees them enter the clearing, stepping out of the RV he had been waiting for them in.

Upon seeing their boss arrive, Alex and Jack walked off slightly to the side and out of earshot, nearby but not interfering with Nathan's work.

"Dude, it's kind of creepy how similar they are..." Louis whispers, hoping Alex and Jack wouldn't be able to hear them from there.

"As I said before; not creepy. Just-"

"Yeah, disciplined, I know, but I didn't mean that. Well, I kind of do but..." Louis interrupted him, glancing over to the two.  
"They both _look_  really similar as well."

Nathan gives him a baffled look, twisting his body around slightly to look to the two before turning back to face Louis, still with the confused expression.

"Well, yeah... Brothers do tend to look like each other... Kinda part of the whole... Sharing genes thing."

"Oh... Oh! They're brothers? That's explains so much..." Louis says somewhat whimsically.

"Now that's that's... Cleared up? Should we perhaps take this inside?" Nathan offers, waving a hand towards the RV he had stepped out of just earlier.

They all enter the RV, now quite familiar with the layout after the few trades they have had over the past year. A few moments after they enter the trailer, they feel it rock slightly, indicating that others had entered after them. They all glance behind them to see Alex and Jack had entered the RV, standing near the back, hands folded over the other in front of them in a very stereotypical looking security guard way.

"And what do we have here?" Nathan asks gleefully as Clementine places the rather heavy backpack up on the table within the RV.

"And I don't just mean whatever it is you've brought us today" Nathan continues, getting Clementines attention to which she sees his eyes had been drawn over to James behind them.

"I don't think I've met these ones, have I?" Nathan asks somewhat uncertain, stepping closer to James and Aasim, sticking his hand out for handshakes.

"No, you haven't." James confirms for the both of them, hesitantly grabbing the man's hand with his own and giving it a shake.

"James, this is Nathan. Nathan, this is James." Louis gives the introductions as they finish shaking hands, dropping them back to their sides.

"And you are?" Nathan asks as he turns to Aasim, also reaching for a handshake.

"Aasim"

"Aasim" Nathan repeats his name with a smile.  
"Good to meet you, son. You both new?" Nathan asks the two of them once they had finished their pleasantries.

"Not both, no. Aasims been here as long as I have, but James here has only just recently joined us." Louis answers for them

"Is that so?" Nathan asks  
"You know him well?"

"About a year ago. We thought he was dead, but that didn't quite turn out to be true. He's only recently come back and accepted our offer to join us." Clementine informs him.

"Smart idea." Nathan directs towards James with a grin.

"That it was." James agrees in his usual quiet tone.

"For the both of us. And for you, too." Clementine adds, which confuses Nathan slightly.  
"If it wasn't for James, we would never have found this, to offer up to you guys."

Before Nathan can further question what she means, Clementine grabs the zipper to the bag and unzips it, revealing a packed bag full of medication and various other medical supplies that were practically spilling out of the bag.

"You guys are always full of surprises, aren't ya?" Nathan says with a delighted smile, though still looking at the pile of medication in front of him.

"And this?" Clementine says, saving a hand over the bag, dragging Nathan's focus away from the bag up to her.  
"This is only a part of it. There's much more, of you want it. And even more, after that."

"Well... Color me impressed" Nathan says with a slight chuckle, stepping back slightly from the bag with his hands on his hips.  
"But I do have to ask... What exactly are you expecting from _us_  for all of this? This is a _lot_  of medicine, after all..."

Clementine gives a nervous glance to Louis, who gives her an encouraging nod. She swallows deeply, before directing her line of sight back to Nathan.

"There was a sort of... Favor, we wanted to ask of you" Clementine begins, watching Nathan for his reaction.

"What kind of favor we talking about here?"

"A somewhat dangerous one, truth be told." Louis tells him, stepping closer to the two of them, reaching Clementines side.  
"Hence the hefty offer of medicine"

"How dangerous we talking here?"

"That's up to you to decide." Clementine tells him, removing the photo of the boat from her pocket and slapping it down on the table in front of her.

"What am I looking at here?" Nathan asks in a confused tone, gently picking up the photo to get a closer look.

"A sunken boat that's filled with useful supplies" Clementine answers

"And surrounded by walkers" James adds

"Yep, I uh... I saw the walkers..." Nathan says, placing the photo back on the table, a confused look still on his face  
"And you want my help to...?"

"To take them out. There's no way we can get to those supplies with all those walkers in the way, but it would also be a death wish for us to try and kill them all ourselves."

"We don't have the weaponry you guys have, and we can definitely tell your guys are better trained. We could really use your help on this" Louis explains after Clementine finishes speaking

"We've come up with a plan on how we think we can do it with the least risk but... Yeah, as Louis said, we could use your help"

"So... You want for me and some of my people to bring our guns, and help you to clear out this area of walkers?" Nathan clarifies, poking his index finger at the photo on the table.

"And in exchange, we get how much of this?" Nathan also asks for further clarification, now pointing to the bag.

"The whole bag will be yours." Clementine answers.

Nathan remains with his finger pointed to the bag for a few seconds before dropping it back down to his side, inhaling deeply through his nose as he raises his hand up to his face, scratching at the few days old stubble on his chin as he thinks.

"This is a generous offer. _But_ , it's also a risky favor you're asking of me. Of my people."

"I get it, it's a difficult thing to agree to. No rush to make a decision, just... Take your time." Clementine offers, seeing the apprehension on his face.

"Actually, this might work out well..." Nathan mutters to himself, nodding in affirmation as he glances down at Clementine.

"There was something I was going to ask you, and this makes it work out better."

"Ask us what?" AJ pipes up, having mostly kept quiet throughout the talk.

"I don't like the idea of making this decision myself. While, yes, I am the leader, what you're asking of me? It involves my people, and it involves their safety." Nathan's begins to explain to them, pushing the photo on the table back towards Clementine.  
"This kind of decision, I would need to head back home to further discuss this with some of my people before coming to a decision."

Clementine is moments away from saying that she understands his reasoning before Nathan interrupts her.

" _And so,_  I think it would make much more sense if you came back to our base with us, just for a visit. I was going to extend the invitation anyway, but it just makes more sense with what's going on.  
You can take the time to get to know some of our people, see what we have while I talk to some of my people. You'll get the answer you need quicker, and won't be stuck waiting around."

Clementine glances over to Louis in shock, only to see he looks as taken aback as she feels. He gives her a shrug as if to say "I literally have no idea what to do here", and so Clementine knows the decision is up to her.

"You're okay with us seeing where your base is?" She asks cautiously.

"I think we've known eachother for long enough." Nathan responds with a smile, taking a seat on the folded out benches of the RV, staring up at them all.  
"It's still quite early in the day. Just a few hours drive in the RV up to the base, get everything sorted, and then we'll drive you back here. You'll be home by tonight, tomorrow morning the latest"

Clementine wasn't entirely too sure how Nathan had managed to turn the situation around so that she'd be making the difficult decision instead of him, and yet, here they were.

Of course, there were risks to going. While she felt she knew Nathan enough by this point that she seriously doubted an attack from them, she can't help but always have that whisper in the back of her brain, telling her to be ready for _any_ kind of situation, no matter the person it involves.

But going to Nathan's base certainly had its positives as well. To get to the know the people better that they've been trading with, and that they may very well be fighting side by side with, if Nathan and his people agree, that is. Seeing the base itself will also help give her ideas as to how they may improve the school, as well as getting a good idea of what exactly they could offer up for trades in future meetings.

"Okay" Clementine draws out the word slightly, giving a slow nod.  
"Okay, we'll visit. But it has to be a short one."

"Of course, I wouldn't expect you to stay away from your group for too long"

Clementine looks over to the others, seeing how they all seemed to agree with her decision. Well, while Aasim wasn't verbally disagreeing, she could see he looked slightly nervous at the thought of going with Nathan's group to a new place, especially as he had only just met them.

On top of that, she couldn't just leave without a word to the group, leave them to think that something bad might have happened when they don't come back. While she didn't like the idea of sending Aasim back alone, it was the only choice, and she had confidence in Aasim bow and arrow skills to keep himself safe. 

"Aasim?" Clementine calls out softly, immedietly getting his attention.

"Yeah, Clem?"

"The others are gonna need to know where we went. Could you head back, let everyone know? Oh, and tell Violet she's in charge till we get back."

"Sure thing" Aasim agreed, with a very obvious look of relief on his face, already hurrying to make his way out of the RV.

"And Aasim?" Clementine calls after him just as he reaches the doorway of the RV, stopping in his tracks.

"Yeah?"

"Be careful out there"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------

As beautiful as the Virginia countryside was, it was certainly boring when passing it by at fast speeds, seeing nothing outside the window but a blur of green as they whiz past the trees, the only smudge of excitement they get when there's a flash of a walker near the road. Though, unfortunately, as explained by Nathan after being asked by AJ, they could _not_ run the walkers over as it would damage the RV (James was certainly glad to hear they would be sparing the walkers, and was definitely disappointed in AJ for asking it in the first place)

Considering how bored she felt herself, Clementine was suprised that AJ hadn't complained once of boredom the whole car ride. Although, she figured it partly might be due to the fact that he had never been in a drivable RV before, and seemed fascinated that such a large space that could double as home could also _move_.

While AJ was able to hold his tongue on his boredom, there was one person who, as expected, could not.

"Man, I don't know how you guys get used to such a long drive, all the time. It must be unbearable." Louis complained, sat on one of the RV's fold out benches, pretending he wasn't at all scared of the fact he was sat without a seatbelt in a fast moving piece of metal which, at any second, could crash and fling him into the wall or out of the window.

"I'm usually the one driving, so I tend to be preoccupied with avoiding walkers and abondoned cars in the road and generally just trying not to crash." Nathan tells them over his shoulder, keeping his eyes on the road.

"Is that supposed to be comforting? That's not at all comforting"

"Hey, I'm just telling you how it is" Nathan defends himself with a chuckle.

"It's those guys you wanna ask, they're usually the ones sat doing nothing the whole drive" Nathan continues, jabbing his thumb towards Alex and Jack who were sat opposite them.

"Not much to say, really. You get used to it." Jack offers, shifting the rifle on his lap slightly.

"Mostly remind myself it's only one small part of the day. Won't be long before I'm out doing something else, whether it be patrol, guard duty, training, or anything else that keeps me occupied." Alex also puts his own thoughts forward after his brother.

"That's a very... Optimistic way to look at it" James says to Alex, who nods in what they can only assume is either some form of agreement or thanks.

"Oh, I nearly forgot!" Nathan suddenly declares, grabbing all of their attention.  
"Few days ago, we hit what some may see as a jackpot, others see as a let down. It'll be interesting to see your opinion on it."

"What is it?" AJ asks with a hint of excitement, intrigued by the ask.

"Nah, I want it to be a surprise. All I'll tell you is we found it in a type of food factory. Cabinets above the kitchen, you'll find them in there."

Alex and Jack remain where they are sat, already knowing the contents of the cabinets. Clementine looks over to Louis who simply shrugs, standing ever so slightly wobbly and making his way over to the kitchen of the RV, steadying himself by the counter.

Glancing up at the cabinets, he makes sure they're not driving over a rough patch that might result in whatevers in the cabinet falling on his head before grasping the small handle of the cabinet door, gently pulling it open.

"Oh man, is this what I think it is?" Louis asks, unable to hide the glee on his voice as he pulls out a pot.

"What? What is it?" AJ implores, trying to stand up on the bench, only to be kept down by Clementines cautious hand on his shoulder.

"Yep. That would be pudding." Nathan confirms for him, a slight chuckle in his voice upon hearing how excited Louis was.  
"You guys are free to take some home, if you want."

"Dude, I could kiss you right now."

"I'd... _really_  rather you didn't"

A quick, deep bark of laughter catches them by surprise, looking over to see it was Alex who had laughed, who looked equally as suprised to have laughed himself. He coughs somewhat awkwardly, not liking all the eyes that were now on him.

"So what would make it a let down?" Clementine asks Nathan, taking the pot of pudding Louis had offered her, trying to read the faded label on the side to no avail.

"Depends on the way you look at it. Most would be excited to see it; a sweet treat they probably haven't had since everything started, forever kept in date by whatever shit they pump into it.  
On the other side of the coin, it's got next to no nutritional value. You'd be much better off going into that factory and finding canned beans or something of that sort, if you wanted something that'll actually keep you alive."

Clementine doesnt say anything for a few seconds as the RV falls into silence after Nathan's words, slowly rotating the pot in her hand, studying the label closely as she collects her thoughts.

"I mean yeah, sure, your chances of survival are better if you find something like beans. But it's _p_ _udding_! I can't remember the last time I had pudding! I'm not thinking about what's in it, I'm just gonna enjoy eating it." Louis put forward his own thoughts, sitting back down on the bench next to Clementine.

"There's always a difference between living to survive, and living to live." Clementine says quietly, getting Louis to look over to her at her statement.

"This moment is the only guarantee you got. Might as well enjoy it" Clementine continues, smiling gently over to Louis who grins in response to the use of his own words.

"I'd say that's a good way to answer the previous question as to how we get used to the drive. We're just finding a way to enjoy what we've got." Nathan says, pulling Clementine and Louis' attention away from one another.  
"That, and that there's nothing better to make you forget all about the drive than seeing your home again."

They all look out of the front window of the RV at this, resisting the urge to drop their jaws open at what they were seeing. They all stand to get a closer look, all except for Alex and James who were understandbly used to it all.

The military base that was sprawled in front of them was bigger than they ever could imagine. Even the outside was bustling with activity; plenty of guards stationed around at strategic points to keep a look out, while another group were hurrying forward towards the RV as it approached, guns drawn and ready. Its not long before they get close enough to recognise Nathan as the one driving, immediately starting to back off and quickly scurry off to get the large steel gates open to allow them access inside.

"So, uh.." Louis begins, still taken aback by the sheer size of the place as they make their way through the gate.  
"How long were you expecting this tour to take?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nathan doesn't even bother to park, instead simply stopping the RV right outside the entrance to the base and beckoning them to follow him out. Once they all depart the RV, he hands the keys over to a waiting soldier, who hurries inside the RV and gets it started, driving it off to what they assumed is the storage area for the RV.

"You ever seen anything like this before?" Louis whispers to Clementine, the amazement in his voice clear, unable to tear his eyes away from everything going on around him.

"Something similar, with a town called Richmond." Clementine responds, watching as a group of soldiers in training jog past them, looking as if they were barely breaking a sweat despite the equipment they were carrying as they jogged in the warm spring air.  
"Though this... This is something new."

"I know the place seems big, but it's more that its... Spaced out. Trust me, it won't take too long for you to get a look at everything." Nathan tells them as they walk, keeping to a steady pace as to let them all get a good look.  
"Most of these buildings were accommodation for the soldiers that were originally stationed here. There's a lot less of us here than there once was, so we use a lot of that for storage now."

A few soldiers idle about as they make their way through the base, either on their own way someplace else, or on some form of guard duty or patrol. Either way, each person they saw was either holding a military grade weapon, or had one strapped to their back, or a pistol attached to their hip or leg.

"Up here is our very own greenhouse" Nathan tells them somewhat proudly, stopping to give them a better look.  
"Lots of produce growing in here. And if you look closely, you'll see we've got some new herbs growing too, thanks to you guys." Nathan expresses his gratitude with a smile before making his way towards a soldier working in the greenhouse.

"Hows everything going here?"

"Quite well, sir. Everything's growing as expected, and some of our greens should be ready to harvest in a few weeks."

"Excellent. Keep up the good work, you're keeping us all fed."

"Thank you, sir."

Nathan steps away from the soldier, waving at them to follow and carrying on in his path through the base.

"Now, what I'm about to show you... As cliche as it sounds, you might want to brace yourself."

Nathan leads them to an area of the base that just have been under construction before the apocalypse broke out; slabs of concrete and bricks sprewn about the area, half finished buildings left to crumble away, rusted building equipment and vehicles sat dormant around the base, some doors still left thrown open.

In the centre of it all, was what could only be described as a giant hole. Roughly the size of half a football field, walls of cement that kept the hole sturdy, showing the hole was clearly meant to be there. But what for?

"I believe they were working on some sort of sewer system, I'm not entirely sure." Nathan explains to them as they slowly begin their approach closet to the hole.  
"There's a sewer tunnel leading out to the base, obviously unfinished. But, where its been left unfinished..."

The closer they get, the more the odd sound Clementine could hear coming from the home became clear. The smell hit her before she could fully realise it, nervously glancing over the lip of the hole to confirm what she thought it was.

At the bottom of the hole was what she could only describe as a sea of walkers; all so tightly packed together that it became near impossible for them to amble around the space they had. Upon seeing everyone glancing over the edge, the ones nearest the wall began scraping their nails down its rough surface, meegerly attempting to grip the wall, trying to find a way to climb it to bring then closer to their meal.

"They come like the tide. During the night, something attracts them to the tunnel and they all filter through here. They remain huddled in here over night until the next morning, where they make their way back out the tunnel."

"Why haven't you cleared them all out?" Clementine asks Nathan, backing away from the hole.  
"You do have the firepower after all."

"Funnily enough, the walkers are actually helping us." Nathan tries to explain, only to be met by blank, confused faces.  
"This base? It was designed to be unbreachable, the very definition of security. That tunnel is an open wound in the security of this base. The walkers act as our own person guards to the tunnel. They're no risk to us as theres no way of them getting in here. Anyone trying to sneak in is going to think twice when they're met by a literal wall of walkers."

They nod in understanding, giving one last glance to the walkers that were still attempting to reach them before Nathan begins to walk away, to which they follow suit.

"Is.. Is that a solar panel?" Clementine asks upon spotting the large generator with black panels on it, hidden away next to a building.

"Oh, yes it is. We have quite a few scattered around the base, supplying electricity to nearly every building here. Without them..." Nathan trails off, reaching a building with a pair of double doors and pulling them open, extending an invitation for them to enter.  
"This wouldn't be possible."

They enter the building, immedietly hit by the smell of cleaning chemicals and the bright white of the building they had entered. Shiny vinyl flooring reflects up at them, lot by the white fluroscent lights the lines the ceiling above them. A row of beds flanked either side of them, a few of them occupied by bandaged and bruised looking soldiers, who eyed them warily as they made their way past.

"You even have a hospital?"

"Of course, it was here back when the base was up and running. Plenty of soldiers would become wounded or fall ill, a hospital was a necessity."

They stop once they arrive at a young soldier sat upright on a bed, staring down at the tube inserted in his arm, watching his own blood gently flow out and into another container, held by a familiar looking man in a slightly torn doctors coat.

"I see you're torturing another of our men today, Matt" Nathan offers in greeting, causing Doctor Williams to spin around at the new voice, immediately breaking into a smile once he sees all of them.

"Good to see you all again." Doctor Williams greets them, eyes sliding over to to James.  
"Don't think I've met you though... I'd shake your hand, but im a bit preoccupied right now."

"That's okay, what you're doing looks more important." James tells him in understanding.

"Why are you taking that man's blood?" AJs accusative voice rings out in the room, getting a sigh from Clementine and an amused snort from Louis.

"I'm not tak-...Well, I guess that's exactly what I'm doing. But, for good reason" Doctors Williams assures AJ.  
"Tell me, what do you think is the number one killer out here?"

"A bite, probably?" Louis guesses.

"That is one of the main ones, yes. Now tell me, what do we do if someone is bitten on the arm, or on the leg?"

"You take it off, try and prevent the spread of infection" Clementine answers, to which everyone glances down at her missing leg.

"Exactly. But what can be the problem with doing that, assuming it works and the bite is no long as problem?"

"Theyre losing a lot of blood."

" _Blood loss_. Whether its from a gunshot wound, a knife wound, any other wound, from trying to prevent someone from turning, blood loss is what often results in someone losing their life."

"So if blood loss is a problem, why are you removing that guys blood?" AJ asks, still very much confused.

"Look at it this way. All of us, have blood  
However, our blood has small changes in them, that make it a certain type. A blood type. Four, to be exact." Doctor Williams explains to AJ, moving closer to the soldier and clasping a hand to his shoulder.  
"Now, John here is Type B. I take some of his blood, we let him rest, and his body makes more. He's not losing a dangerous amount, and he gets it back by his body making it. Now, lets say that, God forbid, something happens to you and you're bleeding. You come to us, injured and losing blood fast. In order for you to survive, we need to fix your injury, stop the blood flow. _However_ , at this point you're losing more blood than you can afford to, and your body can't produce enough blood than it needs.  
But then, we test your blood. We find out your Type B. We take _John_  here's blood out of refrigeration, and we put it into _you_."

Doctor Williams drives his point home by gently jabbing his finger to AJ's chest, who watches him wide eyed, clearly hanging onto every word.

"Just like that, you go from certain death to another chance of living."

"Every month or so, our soldiers come here and give a pint of their blood. Nathan takes over as Doctor Williams returns back to the soldier, finishing up the blood draw.  
"Only the healthy, non injured of course. If its someone's first time donating, Matt here tests it to find out the type, notes down the type next to the soldiers name, labels the bag and refrigerates. Then, in the case of an emergency, we have a supply of all blood types, ready and waiting to save a life."

"That's so cool..." AJ whispers in awe, watching as Doctor Williams pulls the needle of the tube out of the soldiers arm, placing bandage around the puncture wound and dismissing the soldier.

"It really is something amazing you have going here." Clementine compliments them, getting a smile out of both.

"We certainly think so, too." Nathan agrees, freezing for a moment before turning to Doctor Williams.  
"Would you mind giving them a tour around the hospital? Show them what we have, what else we do. If you're not busy, of course-"

"No no, it's fine, I've got some time." Doctor Williams agrees, opening a door to what Clementine assumes is a refrigerating unit, placing the bag into the unit and securing the door closed.

"Oh, and Louis? Do you mind if I speak to you in private for a moment? Nothing scary, I promise, just need to talk."

Louis raises his eyebrows in surprise, not expecting to be separated from Clementine during their tour of the base. He looks over to Clementine, who also seems unsure of the idea, eyes darting between him and Nathan who stands patiently, waiting for him to follow.

A few moments pass before Clementine gives a stiff nod, her eyes boring into his in a way he knows means he needs to be careful, needs to keep on alert. Not that he needed her to tell him, he would have been on alert anyway.

Louis turns away from the others as they head further into the hospital with Doctor Williams, while he follows Nathan down the hospital corridor to the set of doors they had entered through, leading them outside, back into the main part of the base.

_'Be Alert, Be Ready, and Be Prepared'_

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nathan leads him to another set of doors which have two guards standing on either side, eyes set straight ahead as they remain vigilant in their watch. They barely give any sign of acknowledgement yo them being there, remaining as still as ever, as if they weren't even alive, more like a guarding statue.

Nathan pushes open one of the doors to the room, standing aside to give Louis space, waving a hand into the room as to beckon him inside. Louis hurries forward, glancing at the two soldiers by his side as he makes his way into the room.

He had walked into a very clean looking office space. The floor was lined with a simple gray carpet that, quite frankly, should look more much torn and decayed this far into the end of the world. A large wooden desk sat in the middle of the room, appearing much too polished than should be (then again, Nathan's group _could_  have access to polish, though he can't figure out why they would waste time with something such as polishing furniture)

Two chairs sat by the desk, one comfy looking leather desk chair, that Louis could only assume was Nathan's, was tucked under the back part of the desk, and one slightly less comfy looking office chair that was sat opposite the other chair, on the front side of the desk.

An ornate looking cabinet sat flush with the one window that gave an overlook to the entire base, its wooden surface as shiny as the desk that was situated just a few feet in front of it. Various bottles of liqour lined its surface, along with some very breakable looking crystal glasses.

Not far from that was a collection of filing cabinets, the only part of the room that seemed to show some wear and tear. Despite what Louis was sure would have been Nathan's best efforts, the paint of the metal had begun to flake off, as well as some patches of rust starting to develop, particularly around the corners of the cabinet.

Louis stands awkardky in the centre of the room, feeling out of place as he hears the door to the room close behind him, and then the sound of Nathan's footsteps until the man in question passes him. Nathan heads over to the cabinet by the window, picking up a bottle of amber colored liquid. The bottle is met by the small stream of sunlight that enters through the room, and it casts a faint golden light around the room, the liquid inside throwing a moving, swirling pattern of shadows against the walls.

"Can I offer you a drink?" Nathan asks him over his shoulder as he twists off the cap to the bottle, steadily pouring it into a glass he had flipped over.

"Oh, uh... I don't even know if I'm old enough yet" 

Nathan snorts at this, placing the bottle in his hands back on the table and twisting the cap back into place.

"I don't think those kind of rules apply anymore. Don't feel pressured to though. Would be awfuly ironic to survive all the shit this world had to throw at you, only to die years down the line from liver failure"

Nathan ambles over to the desk in the centre of room with drink in hand, pulling out the leather seat with his free hand and dropping down into it, taking a small sip from the glass as he glances up at Louis, who is still standing a few feet away from the desk.

"Go ahead, take a seat" Nathan offers, waving the glass in his hand towards the seat opposite him.

Louis remains stood where he is for a few moments before begrudgingly stepping forward, pulling out his seat and sitting down to join Nathan at the desk, eyes darting around the room to take in as much as he can.

"Relax, son. You look like you're expecting a walker to pop out the walls or something.

Louis smiles meekly at Nathan, letting his eyes drift over to him for only a few seconds before they return to looking around the room.

"I promise you, I didn't ask you here for anything bad. I just thought it would be nice to have a little chat, man to man.  
Honestly, I'm suprised I managed to pull you away from Clementine at all. You two seem connected at the hip every time I see you."

"We always feel better keeping eachother close, that way we can both keep an eye on eachother."

"Oh? You both prone to getting into trouble?"

"Like you wouldn't believe"

Nathan chuckles heartily at this, folding one arm on the desk in front of him, taking another small sip from his glass.

"Why exactly did you want to 'pull me away from Clementine?'"

Nathan lowers the glass back from his mouth, placing it on the table with a gentle 'thud', though keeps his hand wrapped around it.

"There was something I wanted to ask of you. Something that involves Clementine."

Louis frowns at this, not liking the thought of Nathan wanting to talk about Clementine when she's not around. That was never a good sign...

"I will admit, this question is a bit of a personal one. Do you mind me asking?"

"Hey man, you're the one that has me practically hostage in this room with two armed guards rights outside. I think you can ask whatever you want"

Nathan chuckles once more, shaking his head at Louis words as he pushes himself slightly closer to the edge of the desk. He pauses for a moment, studying Louis carefully, his finger tips tapping against the glass he was holding.

"Clementine..." Nathan begins mysteriously, tilting his head in curiosity.  
"Do you think shes the one?"

"The one?"

Nathan smiles, finally releasing his hold on the glass and pushing it slightly away from him, leaning back against the chair and folding his arms together, resting them on his stomach.

"Even a blind man could see the way you two act around eachother. You treat her as if there's nothing more important than the world. You both look at eachother like its the first day you cast eyes on eachother, though you move around eachother with the same familiar comfort of an old married couple."

"Never knew you was such a romantic poet, Nathan."

"But am I wrong?"

"No. No, you're not."

"And so, I ask; Is Clementine the one? Is she the one you envision spending the rest of your life with?"

The question gives Louis pause. Truth be told, it was something he had never given thought to before. It was almost like a default in his mind that he was going to spend the rest of his life with Clementine, never once considering the thought that, at some point, something may happen where they're no longer together.

What did 'spending the rest of his life' with Clementine entail anyway? It was hard to envision anything changing from the way it was now. He tries to think of what it would be like in the old world, where the dead weren't walking on Earth. If he knew Clementine as he did now, would he be happy to do the whole white picket fence life with her?

"Absolutely" Louis tells him, nodding his head along with his answer.  
"To tell you the truth, didn't think of that _not_ being the case until you brought it up. Theres no one else I can think of, who I'd rather spend whatever brief time I have left in this world with."

"Now see, I like the way you answered that." Nathan says with a warm smile, raising his index finger to point at him as he speaks.  
"You answered with confidence, so sure in your answer. _But_ , you didn't answer right away. I could see it in your face, you were ready to say yes right away. But you didn't. You thought about it, used logic to determine your decision. You used one of our best evolutionary traits to come to the decision that benefits _you_  most and still, you come to the conclusion that theres no one else for you but Clementine.  
Emotion and Logic working in harmony. That's a strong bond you have with Clementine there, Louis. Don't ever let go of it."

"Wouldnt dream of it."

Something in Nathan's demeanor changes as he glances over to a cabinet that stood against the wall next to them, eyes fixated on one of the drawers for a few seconds before he finally looks back to Louis.

"There's a story I want to tell you. One that hopefully you'll find a lesson in. Or at least, something that changes your perspective."

"I'm all ears"

Though he agrees, Louis can already tell this isn't going to be a fun story. Simply based on the way Nathans attitude had suddenly become stiff and cold, the way his hands had wandered back to drink, gripping onto it like it was his only lifeline.

"As I've told you before, I was serving in the military before all of this. At the time everything begun to go down, I was back home on leave. When I saw this was at the beginning, I mean right at the beginning. Back when the reports hadn't even begun to release, when only the first few dead came back.

When they came knocking on my door, asking me to return to service, I didn't even hesitate. I lived to serve my country, and that was what I was going to do. They didn't tell me a thing about what was happening, why it was so urgent I had to come back, and I didn't even care to ask. I knew I wasn't high enough in the ranks to know, so I didn't ask."

Nathan pauses for a moment, taking a deep breath to steady himself before she continues, making sure Louis was still paying attention to him as he spoke.

"My... Wife, decided she didn't want to come with me. All we had been told was that I was being deployed in Virginia, and so I assumed my wife would be coming with me. She said she didn't want to leave home, and that she'd be able to visit since I was only a few states over. We had no idea what was coming, and while I would have felt more comfortable having her with me, I let her stay.

It wasn't until I arrived at the base and were given a briefing on the situation that I began to feel the first dregs of regret at leaving her at home. Back then though, I was naive. We all were. We assumed this was something we could take care of, that surely the living would be able to outnumber the dead.

For the first few days of deployment, our missions were mostly comprised of clearing runs. Any areas where reports of the dead came in, we would be dispatched out and tasked to clear them out. And for a while, it seemed to be working. They were slow, dumb, and didn't seem like much of a threat. I thought 'how could we possibly lose to them?'

What I never realised though, was that it wouldn't just be the dead we were fighting."

Nathan stops talking to take a deep drink from his glass, emptying its contents completely, making sure to get every last drop. Upon seeing it empty, he stands from the desk and makes his way back over to the drinks cabinet, pouring himself another glass.

"You know the reason I joined the military, Louis?"

"To serve your country?"

"Yes. And what do you think that entails?"

"I'm... Not sure."

"Most people have their own answer to that. What they're fighting for. For me? Serving my country meant to serve my _people_. To protect the citizens of my country.

Nathan sits back down at the desk, now absentmindedly twiddling with the glass on the desk, dragging it slowly around the surface of the desk as he talks to Louis.

"We never expected how quickly everything would turn to chaos with the people. The sheer amount of... _panic_  that fell on everyone once they realised what was going on.

A month. That's all it took for humanity to crumble. For riots to break out in the street, for people to start shooting at anything that moved, prepared to take from those that needed more, all in the name of survival.

And so that day I had to stand there, to order my troops to return fire on the people I had sworn to protect with my life? I felt like I was only adding to the loss of humanity in the world.

There was one kid left. This _goddamn_ kid. Everyone else had been gunned down, and he should have known fighting back was useless. He was rolling around on the floor, clutching his leg and howling in pain. I approached first, my sights aimed on him, knowing to remain cautious. And yet, when the kid pulls a pistol out and aims right at me, I hesitate. I can't find it in me to pull the trigger. And what do I get for it?"

Nathan takes his hand away from his glass, pulling up his shirt to reveal a nasty looking scar just below his ribcage.

"Wasnt long after I hit the ground that I watched the kid get his damn head blown out. My men had seen it all go down, and had done as they were trained to do, done what I could not.

The gunfire was attracting walkers, we already knew a herd was on the way shortly after the gun fight broke out. I could hear the fuckers, almost smell them they were so close.

I knew I was done for. I wouldn't be able to move in the state I was, and it wouldn't be long before blood loss took me, and that was even in the small chance the bullet hadn't hit anything major. I would do nothing but slow my men down. I knew it, and they knew it.

I ordered them to leave my behind, to retreat and regroup back at base. But... The bond you make with your brothers in arms when you serve? We'll always do our damn best to make sure no man gets left behind.

They disobey my order, and I can do nothing but shout myself hoarse at them to leave me behind as they pick me up, rushing me over to our evac helo. Nothing I can do but watch as the helicopter lifts from the ground, see them dissappear out of sight as we rise into the air.

When we arrive back at the base, there's not a soul left. Shit had gone down in some of the major cities, and every body had been deployed out to deal with the situation. There was only one man waiting for us once we got back, and that man was Matt; Doctor Williams."

"Why did they leave him behind?"

"Most of the other field doctors had been deployed along with the others, but they kept one behind just in case an emergency happened during a local deployment. Which, it did.

Matt carries me out from the helo, and the pilot promises he'll bring everyone back in one piece. As I watch it fly away, barely hanging onto consciousness, I know that deep down, I'm never going to see that chopper again.

When I finally wake up, it's to find out I'm right. No one ever came back. Not my men, not any of the other units. All of them just... Fucking gone.  
At that point, I wished Matt hadn't performed that operation on me. That he hadn't saved my life. It seemed much better going off that way, then to love through this hell hole.

It takes some time for me to recover. Luckily, we had a lot of food left over since we were mostly stocked to keep a whole base up and running. It wouldn't last forever of course, but was enough that me and Matt didn't have to worry about scavenging any time soon.

We both knew that if we were to stay holed up in this base, we would need people. It was much too large to remain unnoticed, and what could two men do to fight off a possible attack?

That should have been my top priority. But it wasn't. Despite knowing how unlikely it was, knowing what the outcome would most likely be, I still had to return home. I had to know, to see if... If she was still alive.

Matt seemed to understand. Tried to keep my spirits up, would tell me he couldn't wait to see me and the misses walk back through those gates. His optimism helped keep my afloat, helped keep me sane as I sat by myself, driving all the way back home.

When I got there, the windows had been all boarded up, and I thanked God that my wife had the brains to know she had to keep herself as hidden as possible. It was the first sign that maybe she had indeed stayed at home, that she was surviving back there instead of wandering out elsewhere.

When I finally managed to make my way in, I could hear movement. I can't tell you how relieved I felt in that moment as I made my way into the kitchen, tears of happiness already in my eyes.

There she was. Tied up to chair in the kitchen, already long turned. Blood coated the chair and floor beneath her, and there was knife sticking out from her stomach."

Nathan arubtly stands from the desk, startling Louis as he watched Nathan briskly walk over to the cabinets next to the desk. He stops once he reaches them, grabbing onto the edges of the desk for dear life, his head bowed down as he tries to collect himself.

"When I left for deployment, she was two months pregnant at the time."

Louis feels his stomach drop, every new sentence Nathan spoke only serving to make him feel worse, and worse, and worse. He knows the customary thing to do right now would be to offer his apologises, but really, what use would they be?

"I don't know if whoever did this to her knew she was pregnant at the time. For my own sanity, I have to think they didn't, because I can't imagine how fucked up a person has to be to willingly do such a thing, to know you would be ending two lifes."

It seemed as if even the hustle and bustle of the base outside the window had come to an arubt halt. The room was covered in a near silence, so quiet that Louis could hear the breeze enter through the window, hear the slight shifting of fabric as the curtains were gently blown in the barely there wind.

"My child would have turned ten this year. _Ten_. It's odd, isn't it? To so keenly miss someone youve never even met."

Nathan pulls open one of the drawers on the cabinet, slipping his hand inside and withdrawing something Louis can't see. He slams the drawer back shut, turning from the cabinet and walking back over to the desk, sitting back down and inching closer, leaning forward with his arms resting on the desk, his head resting on the top of his joined hands, just in front of his knuckles as he watches Louis carefully.

"You were serious, about Clementine being the one?"

It was almost like whiplash, going from such a topic back to the more lighthearted one they had been discussing earlier.

"As serious as I ever can be."

Nathan nods at this, seemingly happy with the answer.

"It's impossible to know how long we have in this life. And that's more true now than ever. I could die later today. Or tomorrow. Or this week. This month. This year. Or maybe I'll live another forty years. Who knows.  
What I do know is that when my time comes, when I'm thinking back on my life, I'll be thinking of my biggest regret. I'll be thinking of the day my wife told me she didn't want to come to the base with me, and I'll think about how I should have done more, done all I could to make sure she came with me."

Nathan lowers one of his closed fists down onto the desk, flipping his hand so the back of his palm lay on the desk. Then, he curls his fingers open, revealing two golden bands sat nearly in the palm of his hand.

"This was the only think I took away, the only thing I had left of my wife. I want you to take it."

Louis balked at the offer, shaking his head in dumbfoundment at what Nathan was trying to give him.

"No, I couldn't! To take these from you, I could never-"

"You would be doing me a favor, Louis." Nathan interrupts him calmly.  
"You said you believe Clementine is the one for you. I want to offer you this, so you have the _choice_. I know the concept of marriage is something lost in this world, and I'm not telling you to get married, that decision will always be up to you."

"But... But these are _yours_. Yours and your wife's. I can't take that away."

"The reason I took her ring with me was to serve as a reminder. So I could look at it, and think back on the happy times I had with her.  
When I look at them, all I can see is her tied to that chair. See all the blood that seemed to coat every square inch of that floor.  
These rings only serve to bring me pain. There's nothing more fitting I can think of, than to give them to someone else, for these rings to brings happiness and love, instead of pain and despair."

"Nathan, it... What you're trying to give me is... I don't even know if I _want_  to be married"

"And I'm not saying you have to. Certainly not right now. But I want you to think about it. To _really_  think about it. If the thought of marriage is something you think might bring you a happiness you didn't even know you wanted.  
I don't want you to make the same mistake I did."

"Mistake? What mistake?"

"When your time comes, just as any one else's does, when you look back at your life, I don't want you to be looking back at the decision in regret. If you have that chance of happiness? Take it."

Louis is unable to take his eyes off Nathan after he finishes speaking, in the same way Nathan seems to stare right back at him. His words rattle around in his brain for a moment, and his eyes flicker down to the pair of rings that shone in the midday sun, still in the palm of Nathan's hands.

Louis reaches out, and gently takes the rings from him.

"Now, I think its time we reunite you with your family, and get this meeting going to get you your answer."

"Answer?" Louis asks confused, dragging his eyes away from the rings in his hands, still in a bit of a daze.

"You know, the whole reason you came here? The plan? Taking out the walkers by the boat?"

Oh, right. He had nearly forgot about that...


	11. Chapter 11

Nathan once again holds the door open for him, the spacious double doors giving Louis ample room to make his way through to the office buildings corridor, pausing once he's out so that Nathan can catch up, and then lead the way back outside.

"Ah, good, seems Matt has wrangled everyone together for the meeting already."

Louis looks over to where Nathan had nodded his head to, nearly stopping in his pace at what he sees.

Nearby the hospital they had entered earlier was a group of people, most he recognised with a few he didn't. While some of them were stood off to the side, chatting amongst one another, Louis could see Doctor Williams, James, Nora, and someone he didn't know grouped around Clementine and AJ.

The thing that stood out to him the most though was the young baby Clementine was holding in her arms, subconsciously bouncing the kid as she spoke to AJ, who was stretching up on his tip-toes in an attempt to get a better look.

"You really are a natural, huh?" Nathan states once they're close enough, standing off to Nora and the unknown man's side, crossing his arms with a smile as he watches her.

"Not the first time I've done it" Clementine shrugs it off, smiling gently at Louis once he reaches her side.

"So who's this little guy?" Louis asks to the group, smiling in response to the smile the baby had on its face as it was gently bounced.

"Well, we thought you might want to meet the life you saved." Doctor Williams responds, one hand in his coat pocket as he reaches out the other to tickle at the babys stomach, getting a delighted squeal as a response.  
"Benjamin here is about six months old. Poor little guy was born a bit prematurely, and his immune system wasnt strong enough to fight off a nasty flu that had spread through the barracks. If it wasn't for the medication you guys had found, and Noras round the clock care, this little guy here wouldn't be with us."

"Oh, I didn't know he was yours?" Clementine says to Nora, a hint of surprise in her voice.

"Benjamin isn't _mine_ , exactly. Me and Eli have been looking after him."

"What happened to his mom?"

The atmosphere becomes tense after Louis's question, a blanket of sadness falling upon the group at the mention.

"You remember when we first met, I mentioned how one of our group me members was pregnant?" Nathan asks

"Yeah, of course I do. You guys wanted advice on how to raise a kid from Clem" Louis answers.

"She was Benjamin's mother. Lexi went into labor early and... It was a difficult birth. There were some problems and Lexi lost a lot of blood. She didn't make it."

"But... I thought that's why you have the extra bags of blood? Why didn't you use that?" AJ asks, directing the question to Doctor Williams with an upset and somewhat confused frown.

"Sometimes it just doesn't work." Nathan responds quietly  
"I tried my best, but she was far too weak, had lost far too much blood. She didn't even make it long enough to hold her baby before she passed..."

"I'm so sorry" Clementine whispers apologetically, locking eyes with a sorrowful looking Doctor Williams before moving her gaze back down to Benjamin, who had started fussing slightly.

"Do you want to give him a hold, Louis?" Eli asks, seeing how attentively Louis was watching Benjamin.

Truth be told, Louis was slightly terrified he'd drop the poor kid while holding him, but if there was one thing Louis was, he was a go getter, and he was going to try his best.

"Is that even a question?" Louis jokes, shuffling closer to Clementine who had moved her arms closer to hand Benjamin over to him.  
"Just, y'know, be ready to catch him"

It's only as he reaches out for Benjamin that he realises just how little he knows about how to hold a baby. While in his mind he has an idea on how he would hold a newborn, Benjamin is a bit too big to hold like that.

He opts for how he had seen Clementine holding him, letting his instincts kick in and resting Benjamin on the crook of his bent left arm, wrapping his right arm around Benjamin's stomach to keep him from falling forward. Benjamin's fussing became slightly louder as he was moved, but had all but stopped now he was settled back down again.

"Look at that! Seems you're both naturals!" Nathan remarks, a smile on his face partly from pride and partly from the brief flicker of terror across Louis face as he first held Benjamin.

"Pfft, this? Easy peasy" Louis says sarcastically, looking down at Benjamin who had thumped his head backwards into Louis' chest, enthralled by the new voice attached to the person holding him.  
"You and me, we're bonded for life, ain't we Ben?"

Benjamin giggled in delight at the rumble coming from Louis' chest, clapping his hands gleefully at the words he didn't understand in the slightest.

"See? What'd I tell ya? Bonded for- ow."

Louis hadn't noticed how Benjamin had become quite interested in his hanging dreads, reaching out and holding onto one with his tight baby death grip.

"And what did I tell _you?_ Always best to keep your hair short." Clementine says with a smirk, though isn't evil enough to leave him without help, tickling at Ben's finger to get him to let go, now transferring the grip to her own finger.

"You can't blame me for wanting to keep my precious locks!" Louis says, a slight tone of mock offence in his voice.  
"Guess I'll just have to keep the advice in mind if we have our own."

He doesn't even have to look over at Clementine properly to know she had frozen up, able to see her tense posture out of the corner of his eye, her eyes wide and eyebrows raised. Doctor Williams coughs awkwardly, finding his shoes an amazingly interesting thing to look at right now. James was in a similar state, deciding it best to keep looking at Benjamin in Louis's arms instead of the potential drama that might unfold. Nathan has a barely there, knowing smirk on his face as watches the two, and AJ seems the least unfazed, more confused by everyone's reactions than what Louis had said.

"What? I said 'if'. _If."_

Clementine squints her eyes at him in response, but ultimately decides she's better off returning her attention to Benjamin. Louis fights off a sigh of relief that Clementine didn't say more on the matter, also returning his focus to Ben.

"As much as I hate to break this all up, we've got a lot to talk about and a decision to be made." Nathan says

"Ill go settle Ben down" Eli says, carefully taking Ben from Louis and holding him close to his chest, walking off in the direction of some of the accommodation buildings of the barracks.

"Nick! Robin! You guys ready?" Nathan calls over to the two men who had stood off the side. Upon hearing his shouts, they quickly finish their conversation and begin walking over to Nathan.

"We'll discuss this in the canteen. Should be clear by now, there'll be more space, more seats. C'mon, follow me."

Nathan leads the way, the other members of his group, while already knowing where the canteen was, still follow his lead, trailing slightly behind. Clementine, Louis, James and AJ remain at the back, not having a clue where theyre going and relying on the people in front to show them the way.

It takes only a few minutes of walking until Nathan leads them into a adjustment sized building, pushing the doors open and heading deeper into the building.

It seemed most of the building was dedicated to being a canteen; the largest available room being furnished with bench like tables, stood in neat rows from one end of the building to the other. Another slightly smaller room was connected to the canteen, which they could only assume was the kitchen.

There were still a few soldiers milling around in the canteen but, upon seeing Nathan and the rest of them enter and make their way to the tables, they quickly begin to gather their belongings and head out of the canteen, giving them the space and privacy they need.

"Alright" Nathan begins, reaching a table in the middle of the room and taking a seat on one of the benches, waiting patiently for the others to take their seats.

"I didn't have much time to tell Matt much about what was happening, so I imagine the rest of you see just as clueless?" Nathan asks his group, who all nod on confirmation.

"Clementine has come to us with quite an intriguing offer. I will admit, I am inclined to take it, but I wanted to make sure the rest of you were on board before diving in on this. So, Clementine? Care to elaborate on this offer of yours?"

Clementine nods to Nathan, removing the backpack of supplies from her bag and resting it by her side for a moment, ready to grab it when she needs to. Then, she removed the carefully folded picture from her jacket pocket, smoothing out the creases the best she can and placing it down on the table.

"We know of a sunken boat nearby in the area, that had cargo inboard when it sunk."

"What kind of cargo?" Robin asks, the first to pick up the picture for a closer look.

"Can't know for sure, other than it's something valuable."

"Valuable as in...?"

"Construction material. Food. Guns. Ammo. Anything like that"

Robin nods at her answer, still keeping his eyes on the photo he was holding before placing it back down on the table.

"We would try and get it ourselves but, as you can see from the photo, there's a lot of walkers swarming the area. You can't see it in the photo, but there are even walkers submerged in the lake."

"It certainly seems a lot, even from what I can see here. And if there more here we can't see as you say there are... That seems next to impossible to clear out."

"Perhaps. Certainty would be for one group." James adds in.

"That's where the offer part comes in. There's no way we'd be able to do it ourselves, but maybe with your help, we could clear most if not all of them out."

"You want to work together on this?" Nick asks for clarification

"It's the only way I see it working, yes."

Nora, who had remained quiet throughout the conversation, steps forward to pick up the photo. Her eyes scan over it for a few moments before she peers at Clementine over the top of the photo, lowering the photograph back down to the table in front of her.

"How exactly did you find out about this boat? It seems mostly submerged."

Expecting this question, Clementine already had her answer prepared. The one that made most sense was the simplest; that they had noticed a sudden surge of walkers nearby, and they had traced the source down to the lakeside, where they had noticed the sunken ship.

Its not what she says, though. She had prepared the answer as she had wanted to keep their encounter with the Delta hidden but, now that she thought about it, she realised there was no need to. Knowing the type of group the Delta was, she found it hard to believe that Nathans group has traded with or been friends with the Delta. While it was entirely possible that they had come across the Delta at some point, it was more likely the encounter was bad than good. Perhaps, if anything, them finding out how they had managed to fight off a very capable and better equipped group would increase their respect for them, would show Nathan and his group that they were just as capable.

"Have you ever heard of a group called 'The Delta?'" Clementine asks.

"The Delta?" Nathan repeats, saying the name as if he was testing the way it sounded. He glances up at Nora who has a blank, unknowing face, then turns back to Clementine, shaking his head 'no' as his answer.  
"There aren't many groups we've come across in the past. Your group are one of the only ones we've actively traded with and any other groups we've met? Well, let's just that it wasn't a positive encounter..."

"We don't know much about the Delta ourselves. What we _do_ know is that they're at war with another group" Clementine tells them

"A war that they're losing. Losing so badly that, in their desperation, they have begun to raid other groups not only for their supplies, but for their people"

Nathan looks shocked by this, leaning back on the bench he's sat at and glancing to his own people, who look equally as shocked at the revelation.

"They're taking the people too?"

"Anyone that seems able to fight, yeah. Didn't seem to have much of a worry over how young people are, either."

"What?"

"It's a bit of a complicated story. All you really need to know is that we were attacked by a a few members of their group, who they had sent out on a scouting mission. Just to try and get a few more people, to force them to fight in their war.

They showed up at our gates, armed to the teeth and ready to take us away. We tried our best to fight them off, but they were well armed, and so they took a few of our people away. Turns out, they had their own boat docked at a lake, and that's where they were keeping our people.

We managed to make shift a homemade bomb and got onto the boat to plant it and take our people home. There were a few... Complications along the way but at the end of it all, the boat still sank." Clementine finishes her story, eyes scanning over the rest of the group for their reaction.

"You guys did all that? By yourself?" Nathan asks, a hint of disbelief in his voice.

"They had our friends. Our _family._ We were ready to do all we could to get them back." Louis replies firmly, not liking having the memory of that night be retold.

"How in the hell did you guys get onto the ship on the first place? A well armed group of people guarding the ship against _you_ guys? I mean no offence, but I mean..." Nick asks them.

"Trust me, I understand. To tell you the truth, none of it would have been possible without James' help"

"Oh, really? Well I have to say, I'm interested to hear what it is that James can do that you all couldn't, that results in you all sneaking into a boat." Doctor Williams says, nodding appreciatively at James.

"It's kind of ironic, really. The way we are able to sneak onto the boat is the reason we're here asking for your help."

"I'm sorry?"

"The walkers. What better distraction is there than a herd of walkers? James was kind enough to help gather a group of them, so he could guide them in the direction of the boat and use them as our bait."

"And how in the hell did he do that?" Nathan asks, glancing to James inquizitivly.

James could see the wheels starting to turn in Nathan's head as he glanced from Clementine to him, a mild panic squeezing in his chest as he wondered if Nathan was coming to the realisation he hoped he wouldn't.

"It was something his previous group used to do-"

"Clementine, I don't think you should-" James says quietly to Clementine, gently touching her arm in the hopes the phsyical contact would get her to stop.

"-He was part of 'The Whisperers'"

The reaction is instanteous. All their heads snap to James, and then Nathan flies back from his bench, smoothly standing from his seat and withdrawing a pistol from his back pocket, keeping it aimed squarely at James. The others of his group are quick to follow suit, withdrawing their own concealed weapons and pointing it in James direction.

Naturally, James scrambles away from the weapons being pointed at him, standing from his own seat and taking a few instinctive steps backwards. Clementine reacts seconds after he does, quickly rushing to her feet and moving in front of James, holding her hands out in what she hoped was a defusing manner.

After the initial shock of what had happened wore off, Louis' brain kicks into action, standing from the table and scrambling to Clementines side and in front of James, holding his arm out to stop AJ from trying to join them, who he knew would be more than willing to put himself in danger to protect his friends.

Clementine had no idea what had put Nathan and his group on edge so suddenly, unable to get a read on how he was feeling. It was a look Louis had seen only once, the closed off expression he wore the first time they had met, able to hide away his emotions to keep them guessing. Though, if he looked closely, he could have sworn he could see a flicker of _something_  behind his eyes as he stared down the barrel at James. It seemed almost like a flicker of fear.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! What the hell are you doing?!" Clementine demands angrily, stepping closer to the others, trying to get their attention diverted away from James.

"He is a _Whisperer"_ Nathan hisses in her direction, the steady hold on his gun starting to falter now it was aimed at Clementine.  
"Dont you know who they are? What they've _done?"_

"Yes, I know what _he's_  done. Of the horrible things he did in that group."

"Those people, they're... I don't even think they're human. Not really. They murder freely and without cause, all for their own sick-"

"It was never without cause." James voice comes from behind Clementine, strong despite the fear he was feeling inside.

"Never without-" Nathan splutters, looking to James in sick disbelief.  
"Do you not hear this? How could you let someone like that into your group?"

"I'm just correcting you. It was never without cause. Causes that were sick, disgusting, and all for the benefit of the group, and the group only. For the benefit of them, no matter the cost to other lives. Something I'm ashamed to say took me a long time to realise. Do you know why?"

Nathans eyes were glued to James now, shaking his head slowly in answer to the question James had directed in him.

"Because it _worked._ I was still alive, wasnt I? And so were countless others in our group. So little of us died, because their methods worked. But how many others had to die, to make sure we lived? How many countless names had to suffer, all in the name of our group? What made it so that we deserved to live, and they didn't? That was something I was forced to ask myself. Something I had to come to terms with."

"Its easy to judge someone, based on what little you know." Clementine begins speaking after James, directing their attention back to her.  
"You all seemed pretty suprised we were able to take on The Delta all by ourselves. That we were capable of planting a bomb on that boat, knowing it would take so many lives. Because you don't _know us_."

"You had a valid reason to. I can see that, anyone can see that." Nathan responds to Clementines reasoning, his eyes quickly darting to her then back to James.  
"The things his group did? The things they've _*done?*_ There's no reasoning to that."

"Do you think I had any valid reasoning, when I shot a man in cold blood over some bullets?"

Nathans attention snaps back to Clementine, staring at her with wide eyes at the confession. Even Louis' head had whipped round to face Clementine, never before hearing her mention such a thing.

"Over some stupid bullets. I though he had sold me fake bullets, and I was so sure he had fucked me over that I pointed it at his face and pulled the trigger to make my point." Clementine voice begins to tremble as she speaks, but she continues none the less.

"I was in a bad place at the time, a time where I thought I had lost the only thing that mattered to me. And you know what? I didn't give a shit about anyone else. I truly didnt. I was doing what I needed to survive.

When I got my first glimpse of hope that AJ was alive, even with that sense of humanity brought back to me, I still murdered countless others without even blinking. Didn't even stop to think what I was doing, just fired until anyone with a gun was down. These poor people who were just trying to keep these kids alive, who were under attack by a bunch of raiders, trying their best to keep their kids from being taken, and I fired a bullet into every one of them. All because _I_ had to get AJ back. Because without him, I lost my sense of purpose. All this terrible shit, and I did it for _me._

Can you imagine how much it eats me up inside? And please, try to tell me that you don't have the same darkness, because I can guarantee, _none_  of you would be alive today without having to do some godawful things, because that's just the way it _is_  now."

"I--I-"

"Do you look at me any different, now that you know some of these things? Or do you try and focus on the good of me that you've seen? You've only just met James, only really know this one part of his past.  
And you know what? I probably don't know that much about him either. I'm sure there's countless other things he hasn't told us about.

But you know what I _do_  know? I know that without this man here, some of my best friends wouldn't be alive. That my group would be in shambles, that the Delta would still be after us. Without him, me and AJ would most likely be dead, and in the unlikely event we had escaped from being shot at by ourselves, AJ would probably have bled out from his gunshot wound without James' help.

You know what else I know? I know that he sees the good, where most people wouldn't. That this man, who was once part of such a violent group, does he best to keep away from it? Even from Walkers."

"Even from Walkers?" Doctor Williams asks, the first to start to lower his gun back down.

"I... People never understand, But... Unless you've truly walked with them, seen them as I have... You can see the people they once were, deep down inside, locked away, forced down by these new found instincts to feed." James attempts to explain.

"So... You don't kill them?"

"When I don't have to, no."

"And despite that? Despite how much he hates to put them in danger, how much he hates the thought of putting others in harms way? He still did it, went against his beliefs, all for a bunch of kids he had only just met, to rescue kids he didn't even know. Why?" Clementine asks to the entire room

"Because I knew it was the right thing to do. That I couldn't sit back and let good people suffer." James answers for her, voice barely over a whisper.

The room falls into a tense silence after James finishes speaking, all eyes on Nathan, waiting for his next move. Nathan keeps his gun aimed at James only for a few more agonising seconds before he takes a calming breath, lowering the gun back down and flipping the safety back on, tucking it away where he had got it from. Nora, Nick and Robin are quick to follow his lead, lowering their own weapons and storing them out of sight.

"I still don't trust you completly, but I trust Clementine and her judgement. If she says you're no risk to us, then we'll be no risk to you."

Clementine releases a lungful of air she didn't even realise she was holding, too caught up in the thick tension that had surrounded everyone in those few moments of quiet.

"If you were able to lead them there in the first place, why are you unable to lead them away?" Doctor Williams asks clearly eager to move off from the standoff.

"Getting them there was different. I only had a small group following me, and the numbers grew as we walked, other joining to form a herd. There would be no way for me to move the entire herd now, as the whole herd wouldn't follow me."

"And leading them away, knowing that theres a whole herd of walkers somewhere nearby wouldnt make us feel very... Safe..." Louis points out.

"Alright, so taking them out is the only option. How do you plan on pulling this off? Even with everyone equipped with weapons, that's a hell of a lot of noise that will only attract more. We have a good shot at this, but I can easily see us getting overwhelmed."

"I was worried about the same thing" Clementine says, leaning over the table to reach the photo.  
"Quick question; you all able to climb trees?"

Nathan gives her a baffled look, glancing at his group to make sure they had heard the same he had. Going by their expressions, he had indeed heard correctly.

"Climb trees? I mean, yes, but... How's that going to help?"

"Walkers can't climb, but we can. If we're all on the ground, we run a risk of them crowding around us at which point, it's all over. We put our best people up in the trees? We've got a team of sharpshooters who can't be bit."

"I see... One group on the ground, one up in the trees?"

"We start off quiet, best not to alert them early on if we can. Give the other team a chance to get up into the trees surrounding the boat site without being noticed. The ground team can start picking off the stragglers around the edge, pick the ones off that won't be noticed."

"And what will the team in the tress be doing at this time? Surely if we start shooting, the walkers will know we're there?"

"We'll be shooting, but not with guns. You guys any good with bows?"

"Since we don't have any here, no."

"Well, we do. Some of my people will be up there with you, taking out walkers with their bows. Your people will stay on standby up in trees and on the ground, guns ready incase things go wrong"

"How do we take _all_ of them out silently? What happens if they start to take notice."

"Its not a case of 'if'. It's a case of 'when'. There's too many of them not to notice us at some point, and it would take much too long to take them out one by one."

"So, what? When they do we just... Open fire?"

"Only the team up in the trees. We take out as many as we can quietly, and when they start to notice us, the ground team starts to back off and disperse amongst the forest while the team in the trees begins to fire at the walkers in the clearing.

The gunfire should attract the walkers to the team in the trees, but they won't be able to get them up there. While the walkers attention is diverted to the gunfire, the ground team can continue to pick off walkers at the back of the herd, out of the way of the gunfire. Hopefully, the walkers should be so distracted by the gunfire that they won't notice anyone on the ground.

The ground team will also have guns, but for _emergencies only_. We don't want to split the herd up by attracting them with gunfire elsewhere, and putting the others at risk. Those on the ground should always make sure theres a tree nearby they can climb. If something goes wrong, they can withdraw and climb up to safety."

"I like it" Nathan declares, nodding at the photo as he goes over the plan in his head.

"But it's not all up to me." Nathan continues, turning slightly to face Doctor Williams and Nora on his left, then twisting the other way to look at Nick and Robin.  
"What do you guys think?"

"I think it could work. We got a few sharp shooters that could make quick work of them, no problem." Robin puts forward his own opinion.

"Agreed. There is one thing we haven't gone over, however." Nora tells them

"What's that?" Louis asks

"What's in it for _us._ This is a dangerous thing you're asking of us, what are you offering us in payment for our help?"

Clementine answers by picking up the the bag she had placed to her side, placing it down on the table in front of the others and gesturing for them to take a look for themselves.

"Now, I'm not going to lie, _this_ is part of the reason I was so eager to take the offer." Nathan jokes, stepping away from the table slightly so the others can get a better look.

"You guys part sniffer dogs or something?" Doctor Williams asks, pulling out some of the medication for a closer look.  
"I don't even know how you manage to find all this stuff... But I'm sure as hell glad you do."

"So we help you clear out those walkers for all of this?" Nora asks

"Yep. That's the offer."

Nora clicks her tongue in her mouth as she thinks, eying the bag for a moment before glancing at Nathan, who was waiting for their response. She gently tugs at his elbow, leading him to the corner of the room to have a discussion. The conversation doesn't last long, only leaving them for a minute or too before joining them again.

"An intriguing offer... But Nora here has brought something to my attention" Nathan begins.  
"This is a lot of work you're doing and for what, to retrieve those crates? You must be under the impression there's something fairly valuable for you in there."

"We don't know what's down there for sure, but, yeah, we do think it's something worth while." Clementine answers Nathan's questioning.

"In that case, how about this. We will help you to kill all of the walkers around this boat. In return, we get the bag of medicine. _And,_ we get one crate from the boat. Just one, the rest is all yours. How's that sound?"

It would have been foolish to assume Nathan and his group wouldn't be interested in the crates they were trying to retrieve, and a part of Clementine knew that something like this might happen.

Quite honestly, Clementine was expecting them to ask for more, so hearing that they only wanted one was a pleasent surprise.

While Clementine had already made her mind up, she found herself in the same predicament as Nathan in which she didn't want to make the decision on behalf of the whole group. Then again, this was the reason she had brought James and Louis with her, so she could others opinions on the matter before reflectively agreeing to a decision on her.

She turns to them, ready to do as Nathan had done and find a private spot to speak, but she doesn't have to. As soon as she glances over at them, they both nod in agreement to the deal, confident that Clementine will make the right decision for them.

"I think it sounds agreeable." She tells Nathan

"We'll need a few days to prepare, choose who we want to bring, get our armory prepared and all that. I imagine you'll need a few days to prepare too?" Nathan asks

"Yes, just to make sure everyone back home is easy for this."

"Right. In that case I'll get one of the boys to drive you home in one of our spare trucks, probably Jack, I'm fairly sure he's off duty at the moment.  
Meet us in the usual meeting spot in three days, from there you can lead us to where we need to go. Hopefully, by the end of it, you'll have a walker free clearing and a collection of crates, and we'll walk away with a bag full of medicine and a crate for ourselves."

Clementine stretches her hand out over the table, offering it to Nathan who grabs it and gives it a firm shake with a pleased smile.

"Sounds like a deal"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"-And I think if we tie it around here and here for some extra securement, I think it'll hold." Willy tells Zara as he points out places in his roughly drawn sketch.

"And you're sure it's tall enough?"

"I don't exactly have measuring tools over here, Zara. I'm going by eye." Willy tells her with a sarcastic tone, throwing his hands up in the air, a bit frustrated with the whole thing.

"-But...Look, I'll make sure it's tall enough and stable enough to reach the top. Even if I have to take it out there myself to check."

"You think you'll be able to do all this without Violet noticing?"

"It'll be tricky... But it's not the first thing I've successfully hid from the others."

' _What... What does that even mean?_ ' Zara thinks to herself.

"The trickiest part will be trying to hide all the wood I'll be bringing in here to build this. I could always say I'm working on some new designs got the new rabbit cages or some shit like that."

"Whatever works. I'll do my best to keep her away whenever she gets suspicious"

"I'm fairly sure that'll just make her suspicious of _you._ She'll probably think you're planning to kill her or something."

"Right... Well, lets just hope she doesn't notice then?"

Zara begins to make her way towards the basement stairs to exit the room, but Willy's voice stops her from going any further

"Hey, Zara?"

"Yeah?"

"I just want to say... I think it's really cool. What you're doing for Violet. It'll be really nice to see Violet up in the Bell Tower again, like she used to. I feel like with this, we might get a piece of the old Violet back. So... Thanks."

"It's not just me, Willy. There's no way I could do this without your help, you're the one building the thing."

"Yeah, but... You're the one who thought of it, when no one else had the effort to. I feel like it's something I should have thought of earlier..." Willy admits the last part quietly, almost as if he was ashamed of himself

"That doesn't matter. What matters is you're part of it _now._ That you're willing to help. It'll make all the difference to Violet."

The sound of the old rusting basement hatch opening sends them both into a panic, Zara whirling around to see who it was while Willy rushes about to hide his sketches, wondering if it was worrh tearing them up and redrawing them over wasting time trying to hide them.

Zara sighs in relief when she hears the thud of a fake leg making its way down the stairs, knowing it'll be Clementine before she even enters their line of sight.

"Hey" Clementine greets them once she gets to them.  
"You ready for the lesson?"

"Lesson?" Willy asks in puzzlement, brain still struggling to catch up after getting over the initial panic.

"Yeah, was about to come find you actually" Zara answers

"I'll explain once we're up there." Clementine leans to her side slightly to address Willy before she turns and goes back up the stairs she came from, Zara and Willy not too far behind her.

They're greeted by the sight of everyone grouped together in the courtyard, an excited murmer spreading throughout the crowd as they discussed what they were all being brought together for. The benches of the courtyard had been pushed away and to the sides up by the schools walls and buildings, creating a large clearing in the centre of the courtyard.

"Hey, everyone" Clementine addresses the group, who quickly start quietening down as Clementine began to speak.  
"As you guys know, we've got a difficult task ahead of us in just two days, and I want to make sure we're all prepared for it.  
I've asked Zara for her help and thankfully, she's agreed."

"Help for what?" Omar questions from somewhere within the group.

"To help you guys get better at hand to hand combat. A few of you will be on the ground taking out walkers, and I want to make sure everyone's ready for that."

"What about those who aren't part of the plan?" Ruby asks, whose skills as a nurse were deemed far too valuable to risk by Clementine.

"I still think we should all go through the training, even if you aren't part of what's happening. It's a useful skill to have, and you never know when it could come in handy."

"Does that mean I get to take part?" Violet asks, sat by herself nearby on on of the pushed aside benches, having already assumed she wouldn't be a part of it.

 _"Especially_  you. This kind of stuff is exactly the kind of thing you need to train more on."

"You didn't think we'd leave you out of all the fun, did you? " Louis teases her from within the group, earning another one of Violets signature eye rolls.

"Typically when you're fighting, you'll have a weapon in hand. A knife, a bat, something like that. _Obviously,_ we can't practice with that because someone will end up hurt.  
So instead, we'll be using sticks."

"Sticks? Really?" Willy asks, seemingly unimpressed.

"Willy, I think we _all_ know someone would end up with a broken bone or a stab wound if we let everyone fight with _real_  weapons." Louis points out

"Fair enough" Willy mumbles, admitting defeat.

"How are we going to do this?" Aasim asks

"One against another. For the first round, everyone else watches to note down any areas of strengths and weaknesses. That way, the fighters can get tips on how to improve, and the rest of us have the knowledge to improve ourselves for the next first.  
After that, the teams of two will switch around so everyone gets a chance to fight someone different. Sound good? "

A general sound of agreement passes through everyone.

"Who goes first?" AJ asks from the side line, much too young to go against anyone in the group.

"Well, I thought it would be good if I went up first against Zara." Clementine answers  
"We both have different fighting styles, so I'd love to see what I can pick out from Zaras, see what I can implement into my own."

"I could go first?"

The words slip out of Louis before he can stop them, fueled by the panic he felt at the thought of Clementine having to fight Zara. While he had full faith in Clems fighting ability, having seen it first hand many times, he knew that Zara was an equally matched fighter to her, and the fear he felt at the thought of Clem getting hurt and kicked him into action.

"Uh, I mean..." Louis stumbles over his words, taken aback by all the eyes that had turned their attention to him.  
"Just, y'know, so Zara can uh... Warm up and everything against a least skilled opponent and uh... So I can get my part over with?"

It was a poor excuse. He knew it, Clem knew it, Zara knew it, everyone knew it. He was certain Clem could see through his lies but, regardless, she shrugs her shoulders in response and walks over to the rest of the group, ready to observe.

The nerves begin to kick in once he heads over to one of the benches to pick up a stick Clementine had gathered for today, glad they were all blunt and not sharp.

"Quick question, we throwing punches?" Louis asks Clementine, eying Zara worriedly.

"You do what you think you would need to do. Just... Make sure you're not doing it 100 percent, okay?"

"Wow. That makes me feel so much worse..."

Louis returns back to the centre of the clearing, stood opposite Zara who had also collected her own stick for the fight.

"I'm worried I'm going to hurt you" Louis admits, regretting the way he had said it as soon as he's sees the challenging eyebrow raise from Zara.  
"A-A-And before you say it, I don't mean it as in I'm better than you! Trust me, I know I'm not"

"Then what do you mean?"

"I mean it more in the way that I'm going to flail around and accidentally poke your eye out or something. Or maybe trip over and fall on you."

"Hey, you use whatever works." Zara jokes with a shrug of her shoulders.  
"We'll see how it goes, shall we?"

"Uh, how do we know when the fights over?"

"Whenever someone yields"

Louis can see the moment Zara concentrates in on him and begins to inch close. It's with a panicked jolt he realises the fight has begun. He has no clue what to do, whether to make the first move, the first attack, or simply stand back and defend, wait for Zara to strike and see what he can do from there.

Zara decides for him, baffling him completly by dropping down to the ground, so puzzled that he does nothing but look down at her. It's doesn't hit him what she's doing until her feet collide painfully with his shins, knocking his feet out from under him, his back colliding forcefully with the dirt beneath him. One second he was upright, the next he was laid out on his back, the wind knocked out of him and unable to a thing but wait until the shock subsides and the pain hits.

Through the ringing in his ears, he can just about make out the sound of laughter from those watching around him. The loudest of course being Violet, who he was fairly sure was laughing so hard that she might throw up.

"Damn, Zara! Wheres your camera, I should have gotten a photo of that!" Violet manages to get out through her laughter.

"I yield... " Is all Louis can get out once he is able to breathe again, still waiting for his brain to stop rattling away in his skull.

"You good?"

Zaras concerned face pops up in his vision, and it take a few moments for him to realise she was offering him a hand up.

Louis gladly takes it, struggling to his feet more than he'd like to admit, slightly embarrassed by how quickly he had been brought down. It must have been a new world record for take downs...

"Are you hurt?" Comes another concerned voice, a gentle touch to his arm along with the question. He didn't even have to look over to know its Clementine (who was starting to feel guilty for laughing, even if the concern eventually won out)

"Yeah, nothing but my ego..."

Clementine rubbed his arm reassuringly, knowing full well he would be sulking about this for days.

"Don't worry about it, Lou. You're new at this. Give it some time, you'll get better."

"Maybe. But we're going after the walkers in a few days! There's no way I'll be any better by then..."

"Louis, you'll be taking on _walkers._ Something you've done thousands of time before, right?"

"I mean, sure, but-"

"You really think the walkers are going to be kicking your legs out?"

"... No..."

"So it doesn't matter! You do as you usually do, and you'll be fine. You'll school those walkers, no problem."

"Hell yeah I will!" Louis agreed enthusiastically.

"Come on, let's go see Zara kick everyone else's ass"

"But not yours, right?"

"You never know."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After being sent careening into the dirt after a particularly brutal hit to the chest, Violet finally called it quits, realising she was in too much pain to do much else and actually have a chance of winning.

She's just about able to make out a hand in front of her, realising that someone was offering to help her up. Already too sore to prove she doesn't need any help, she begrudgingly takes the person's hand, and feels them lift her up to her feet.

"Sorry our first fight is a public one. I promise, I'll give you your private lessons at some point." Zara tells her , letting her hand slip away from Violets once she's standing again.

"I assume it'll be as painful as this one?" Violet asks, hobbling over to the side to place her stick back down.

"That all depends. It'll be fun though! Come on, you gotta admit this is fun."

"Yeah, well, I'm sure it's a lot more when you're on the other side of a beating."

"Violet, you're _good_  at this. I promise you, you'll be the one handing out beatings in no time."

"You sound very eager for this."

"I am. Its nice getting to spend time with you. The private lessons will be good. "

"Oh yeah? Why, because you can poke me with your stick in private?"

Violet hated the words the second they left her mouth, and she knew judging by Zaras raised eyebrows that she had heard it the same way she had.

"That... That couldn't have sounded worse, could it?"

"No, no it probably could have. I wouldn't put it past Louis to have said some dodgy stuff."

"So much. An incredible amount. I'm honestly shocked Clem hasn't left me yet." Louis inputted as he strolled past.

"See?" Zara says with a smug grin before heading over to Ruby and Aasim, striking up a conversation with the two of them over their fighting skills.

Violet huffed, though with her smile on her face, knowing that Zara was doing her best to make her feel less awkward about the, frankly, quite terrible thing that had just escaped her mouth.

It seemed that their make shift fighting class was beginning to wrap up for the day, made clear by the darkening of the sky above them, and the general mumbles of complaints from everyone over sore muscles and well, generally being beaten up all day.

Violet feels her eyes drift back over to where Zara is, as they usually do these days. In fact, over the past few days it's something she's noticed herself doing more and more frequently. This weird feeling of _needing_  to know where Zara is, to make sure shes alright. Maybe its the nerves from the upcoming plan coming to fruition, knowing that Zara is going to be out there, putting her life at risk while she's left here, unable to help.

Or, maybe it's simply because she _wants_ to look at her.

The realisation of what she was feeling seemed to come out of nowhere, taking her by complete surprise. As much as she hated to admit it, she had to take a few moments to herself to just sit there and think about it all, to let the realisation sink in.

It's all shes been able to think about for nearly _two weeks_  now. She can only hope that Zara hasn't noticed anything different, though it seems unlikely by the way she can feel her face heat up anytime she so much as glances in Zaras direction, stumbling over her words in a conversation when she was able to speak perfectly normal sentences not too long ago. Zaras good at picking out details, good at knowing when something is wrong.

So far, she hasn't mentioned any of it to Violet.

And she _hates_  that.

While yes, she should be glad Zara hasn't said anything about it and kept her secret safe, there was part of her that didn't _want_  it to be a secret.

This had been her problem before. Back when she liked Clementine, she had been too scared to admit her feelings not only to Clementine, but to herself. When she finally did, she kept it to herself, didn't let herself take that chance because she thought it would save her the pain. Instead, it did the complete opposite.

And now, here she is, doing it all again. She doesn't _want_ to, but just the thought of telling Zara how she feels is... Its all way too much. And so, as she tells herself she hopes Zara never figures it out, she knows deep down that she _wants_ her to. That Zara will bring it up, show her the evidence right in her face so that then, and only then, will she have no choice but to admit everything.

Because deep down, she knows the only way she'll tell Zara is if she _has_ to.


	12. Chapter 12

As odd as it seemed, the feeling of air whipping around her legs was more comforting to her right now than any words could ever be. Only because of the person it was connected to, of course.

"I thought I said to come back with happier news?"

The corner of her lips twitched up at the all too familiar gravely voice, scooting from her spot by the opening of the train to rest against the open door, glancing up to the person in question.

Lee looked as he always did, of course. His blue button down was as immaculate as ever, despite the fact that he was leaning against a bunch of old, dirty, dusty crates that the train was _supposed_ to be carrying, not a bunch of people who had somehow lost their way.

He hadn't aged a day since she last saw him. Again, why would he. At the end of the day, this was all just in her head, no matter how cruel of a reminder it was.  
Not that it mattered. His warm smile was all she needed right now.

"I will once I get some happier news." Clementine retorts, gazing out to the passing scenery that flew past them.

"Oh, I'm sure you've had plenty of good moments. But no one ever needs advice because of something _good._ That's why you're here, isn't it?"

Clementine sighs deeply out of her nose, nodding to Lee as she looks back to him, his smile still there, though she could still see the way the concern was etching its way into his expression; through the slight furrow of his eyebrows, the frown lines on his forehead more prominant than ever.

Even ten years after his death, she was still a source of his worry.

"I don't even know why I'm worrying about it so much. We have a plan, and it's a  _good_  plan. We even have more people-"

"People?" Lee stops her, an inquisitive tone to his voice.  
"People you can trust, I hope?"

"Of course, Lee. I'm not going to ask random people to help in a task that puts everyone's life at risk."

"Hmm. I'd say that's why you're worrying."

"What?"

"A task that puts everyone's life at risk? You said it yourself. You'd be crazy not to be worried about that."

"Yeah, I know. And I get that. It's just... Its not like last time, y'know? We're not doing this because our life is at stake, or because we need to rescue our people."

"So why are you doing it?"

"For supplies. Supplies that we're not entirely sure what _are"_

"And are these supplies you need?"

"Right now? I mean... Maybe? Kind of hard to tell when you don't know what supplies you're actually going to be getting..."

"So I'll ask again; why are you doing it?"

Lees eyes were boring into her own as he asked, that combined with the forced tone of his voice forcing her to avert her eyes down to the floor of the train, picking mindless at a nail that had begun to loosen from one of the boards.

"Because it felt like we needed to? I don't know, really..."

Lee sighed at this, pushing himself away from the crates and over to her, groaning quietly at the creaking of his joints as he took a seat next to her, swinging his legs over the side of the open door train.

"C'mon, Clem. I'm in your head. We both know you know why."

Clementine finally yanked the nail free from the wood. She rolled it around between her fingers for a moment before flicking it off the edge of the train, both of them trying and failing to track the nail as it was whisked away by the wind.

"Because I'm scared."

"Scared of what?"

"That the Delta is still out there. They know where we are and if they come after us again..."

"Why would they?"

Clementine scoffed, trying to pretend she wasn't letting the irritation rise to the surface to hide the vulnerability she knew she was showing.

"They're desperate. They need more people-"

"You haven't heard a thing from them in over a year-"

_"-And_  they know we killed some of their best people."

"Wouldn't that... Put them off?"

"Or piss them off. Taking out their best people _and_  blowing up their boat?"

"How would they know that was you?"

"They've been to the school before, back when Marlon started trading people... They send some people out to get us, then don't come back? I think they'll be able to figure out why that is"

"You're worried they'll come back for you all then?"

"Yes. I know it seems like they won't but... I can't stop thinking about how screwed we'd be if they came back again. We'd be so unprepared..."

"And that's why you want to raid the boat..." Lee murmers with a tone of realisation, nodding along with the epiphany.  
"You're hoping for supplies that'll help you prepare?"

"I don't know what the future holds for us. Or if there even is one for us. What I do know is that I won't be able to rest until I know we can protect ourselves. That my family will be okay."

Lee smiles at this, and she feels a sense of calm wash over at her as she places her restless hands in her lap, taking a moment to breathe after her admission.

"Oh, Clem. You're still much too young to have all this weight resting on your shoulders. And I'm sure that's quite difficult when you only have one leg."

She can't help but snort at that, but still gives Lee a slight nudge with her prosthetic in retaliation to the statement.

"You're just lucky my brain let you keep your arm in my dreams"

"Ouch" Lee replied, squinting accusedly at her.  
"Louis really had been rubbing off on you, hasn't he?"

Clementine chuckles lightly at this, giving a shrug of her shoulders in response. She supposed that when you spend nearly every hour of every day with someone, you're bound to pick up _some_  of their mannerisms. Even if said mannerisms sometimes make you feel exhausted...

"I was going to go all protective parent mode and dislike him solely on instinct, but..." Lee trailed off, looking almost annoyed with something. Or someone...  
"That would be a lie. I like the kid."

Clementine doesn't even bother trying to hide her confusion, frowning up at Lee as she waited for him to explain.

"What made you like him?" She finally settles on asking when it seems like Lee wasn't going to elaborate.

"Because he makes you happy. And that's all I ever wanted for you."

The blaring sound of the train horn ruins the calm atmosphere around them, replaced with one of sadness as they both knew their time was coming to an end.

"This supply run you're doing... Do you feel like you have to do it?"

"Yes"

"Do you think you are capable of doing it?"

"Yes"

"Do you think the others are capable of doing it? That this other group of yours are capable?"

"Yes"

"Then what did you need to speak to me for?" Lee teases her, pushing himself back away from the open door and standing back up.

"Because sometimes I need to hear your voice. To hear you tell me it's going to be alright"

Lees happy smile turns sad at this, and it's only a few seconds before she's engulfed in a hug. She buries her face into the scratchy material of his shirt, relishing the last few moments of peace she'll have with him before she's forced awake.

"It _will_ be alright." Lee assures her quietly in her ear, squeezing her tighter as he speaks.  
"AJ will be safe with back at the school, you know that. Louis will be fine, as he always is."

She pulls away from the hug at this, looking to Lee questioningly.

"How did you know I was worried about-"

"In your head, remember?" Lee stops her with a knowing smile, raising a finger to tap at his own head.  
"Now, I actually want to hear _good_  news when I see you next, alright? You know you're welcome to see me anytime, but I want to hear something happy from you, alright? No matter how small it seems."

"Okay, Lee" Clementine agrees softly.  
"I'll find something happy."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

One of the schools spare bows slipped slightly down Clementines shoulder as she gazed around the clearing of their usual meeting spot, Nathan and his group still no where to be seen. She could tell the other kids were getting restless and frankly, so was she. No matter how much she told herself that everyone here was capable of what they were about to do, she couldn't fight down that unrelenting fear that _something_  was going to happen.

"You said we were supposed to meet shortly after dawn, right?" Aasim asks, anxiously readjusting his own bow.

"Relax, Aasim. It's not like we have a watch on us or anything. It might take a few minutes, but they'll be here." Louis assures Aasim.

From a distance, Louis seemed calm and collected. But if you knew him like Clem did, you'd be able to see the built up agitation and worry in his small movements; his eyes darting around his surroundings, never able to rest on a sole object. The twitch of his right knee, feeling the need to move but not knowing where. The barely noticeable clench of his jaw as he grinds his teeth, needing to do something other than wait.

All of a sudden, the forest turns alive around them. Clementime has a tenth of second to react to the flock of birds that had taken off out of a nearby tree, spooked by something she is unable to see. At the same time, the horse they had brought with them begins to paw at the ground, snorting in agitation as it shifts around, causing the cage it was pulling to start teetering on the spot.

They whip around at the sound of bushes rippling and shaking. Clementine wastes no time, yanking her bow off her shoulder and drawing an arrow as quick as she's able to. James, Louis and Zara slide their weapons out from their pockets, Louis holding Chairles above his head, James keeping his knife low and by his side and Zara holding her own knife in front of her. Aasim, Willy, and Omar follow her lead, aiming away from eachother and slowly backing into one another, keeping their bows ready and aiming. Problem was, how do you know what to aim at, when the sound is coming from all around you?

The sound stops. Clementine nearly releases the arrow in surprise when the barrel of a rifle sneaks out from the bush she's facing, quickly followed by the guns owner. The man is covered head to toe in mud and old, dried leaves. Its no wonder she couldn't see them until they showed themselves. The panic swelling in her chest is quick to deflate once she gets a better look at the man in question, lowering her bow with a relieved sigh.

"Right on time, Alex"

Alex doesn't say anything in greeting at first, instead bringing up a hand to his mouth and letting out a quick, sharp whistle. Seconds later the sounds from the bushes resume, and then there are more people emerging from within the bushes and behind the trees. A few she recognised; Robin, Nick, Jack and Nora. The others, ten of them from a rough count, she did not recognise.

"Wheres-"

Clementine doesn't get to finish her question, as there's a sudden blur of movement in front of her, taking a startled step back as someone jumps down from a tree branch overhead.

"Jesus, my knees aren't what they used to be..."

"Nathan? God, you scared the crap out of us." Clementine says, a small hint of irritation in her voice, not too happy about being startled when they were already in edge.

"Yes, well, I have to say I'm quite disappointed."

"Dissappointed?"

"We've been here for fifteen minutes or so before you guys showed up. Not only did you not notice, but you allowed us to group around you. You didn't even notice until we started making all that noise. You've got to be more careful out here."

"Message received" Clementine responded, though softened her scowl just a bit when she saw the genuine worry showing on Nathan's face.

"We ready for this?" Nathan asks her, glancing over to the others behind her.

Clementine looks around, seeing how Nathan's people looked ready for anything. They were grouped together, half with rifles in hand that rested down low, the other half with pistols tucked away in holsters and knifes tucked away, hands hovering nearby their weapons.

The Ericsons kids on the other hand... Well, it was hard to look as impressive next to Nathan's people. Mostly, they looked confused, glancing around at the new stoic faces that now surrounded them, constantly averting their eyes to Clementine in a clear plea for help.

And Louis... Of course, he was busy trying to strike up a conversation with the two brothers, Alex and Jack. It seemed that Jack was at least somewhat trying to entertain Louis, politely nodding along to whatever Louis was saying to him, though his plain expression gave no hint as to whether he was actually taking any of it in. Alex couldnt have looked any less interested, eyes set straight ahead to the forest in front of him, always on watch. Quite frankly, Clementine wouldnt be suprised if Jack didn't even know their names. He didn't really seem like a talkative kind of guy...

"As ready as we can be."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The rough bark scrapes against her skin as she bit by bit pulls herself up the trunk of the tree, fighting through the burn of her joints as she stretches her arms out as far as they will go, reaching for the next branch for support. All the while, she has to try and block out the near defeaning groans from the herd less than thirty yards away from her, praying with every snap of a twig that the walkers own noise would block out any other sound.

Finally, Clementine makes it to the branch she had been climbing to, straddling the branch as she takes a moment to collect her breath. She looks down the ground below her, and smiles when she sees Louis watching her, giving her a thumbs up once he sees that she's looking at him.

Remembering that this was how Louis was supposed to ask whether they ready to begin, Clementine quickly scans the tree tops nearby to make sure everyone's in position. It only takes a few moments to spot Nathan getting himself comfortable on one of the trees nearby, pulling his rifle around from his back to his front.

Nathan feels eyes on him, and looks up to see Clementine watching him. Like Louis, she puts her thumb up in asking, and so Nathan glances all around him to check where his people are. Nora was already situated on a nearby tree, waiting for her next orders. Robin, Alex and a few other men were just finishing their climbs, and so Nathan waited until they were sat securely and had their rifles in hand and ready before giving the thumbs up in return to Clementine.

This was it. No turning back now. There was nothing she could do but trust in the plan, and trust that Nathan and his people would do all they could to keep everyone alive. She gives a stiff nod in acknowledgement to Nathan, but she doesn't even know if he can see it or not.

She looks back down to Louis, who hadn't taken his eyes off the her entire time, standing and waiting for her go-ahead. For a while she's unable to do anything but stare back at him, the small voice in the back of her head whispering that maybe, just maybe, this will be the last time she gets to lay eyes on him.

Swallowing past her fears, she gives a somewhat feeble thumbs up.

"That's the go signal" Louis whispers to the ground team, who were huddled together as they kept an eye on the ever moving herd close by.

"Alright, you all know your jobs. Spread out around the outer perimeter, _only_  take out walkers if you're _certain_  you won't be noticed." Jack's voice is clear, easily heard above the noise while somehow keeping quiet enough as to not attract any unwanted attention.

"Stay close by your partner at all times, and keep an eye on eachother, make sure you've got eachothers backs. Remember, do _not_ fire your gun unless you have no other choice. If it all goes downhill, back off and climb up to safety. Got it?"

There's a mumble of affirmations, which seems to satisfy Jack.

"Good. Now spread out."

Louis catches James' eye, who glances over to Zara next to him to make sure she's ready. Once he sees her remove her knife from her pocket, he nods his head in goodbye at Louis as he slides his knife out of his pocket, turning and walking away with Zara, disappearing amongst the trees. In groups of two, the rest of them disperse into the forest, until its only Louis and Jack left behind.

The severity of what they were about to do suddenly hits Louis, who feels his palms begin to clam up as the nerves kick in, sending his brain into over drive. He can hear as well as feel the way his breath hitches in his throat, unable to go back to the calm manner he was breathing in moments ago.

He could die here.

Clem could die here.

They could _all_ die here.

"Hey"

The voice along with the surprisingly gentle hand on his shoulder snaps him out of whatever trance he had gotten into, turning his head to see a concerned looking Jack watching him having a break down.

He was pretty sure it was the first emotion he had _seen_ from Jack.

"You sure you're ready for this?" Jack asks, slipping his hand away from Louis' shoulder.

"No. I-I mean, yes, I am. Just... Worried, is all."

"Listen, we can do this, alright? I'm going to do all I can to make sure you get out of this alive. That everyone gets out of this alive. I've got your back."

"Thanks. Really, I appreciate it. I'll... I'll do all I can to return the favor. I've got your back, too."

Jack nods at this, and Louis figures that nodding is the only version of a smile he'll ever get from Jack.

"Don't think about it too much. Focus on the plan, and we'll get through this."

Louis tries his best to follow what Jack had said as they slowly begin to approach the herd. It's hard to think anything at all though, when it's been drowned out by the sounds of the dead as they shuffle around, the collected sounds of them all drawing every closer with every timid step forward.

It takes all of Louis' will to keep walking forward once the herd comes into view. From where he's standing, they seem endless, forever stretching across the horizon and as far as the eye can see. The task ahead seems impossible, at the least will take hours upon hours of careful, methodical movements.

This was going to be a long day.

Jack is, of course, the first to take action. A walker that was foolish enough to stray too far away from the rest of the herd had wandered out into the forest, stood by itself with its head cocked at the tree in front of it, as if it was trying to figure out whether the thing blocking its path was alive or not.

Jack moves fast yet silently, his knife finding its way into the walkers skull in a matter of seconds. He catches the now fully dead corpse as it collapses to the ground, knowing that simply letting it fall to the ground would be too much noise. Instead, he gently lowers it down, giving a quick glance around to check if he was spotted before moving to the next walker.

Knowing he can't stand here all day and let Jack do all the work, Louis gathers all the courage he has and forces himself further forward. He spots a lone walkers that had its back turned to him, and silently prays to any God's there are that it wouldn't turn as he approaches.

Chairles is a familiar weight in his hands, and helps him to feel more grounded and more aware as he gets closer and closer. Now close enough to smell the awful stench emitting from the corpse in front of him, he winds Chairles back behind him, years of muscle memory and a good eye helping him to swing the bat directly into the side of the walkers skull.

The resulting 'thwap' and crunching of its skull makes Louis cringe, not from the grossness of it, oh no, he was far too used to that by now. More so that the sound seemed explosive in his ears.

The walkers drops, and Louis quickly throws his arms out to catch the walker as it drops, a brief moment of panic arising when he misjudges just how heavy the walker was going to be and nearly drops it to the ground. Once steadied, he lowers the walker down the ground, and then sneaks a glance up to the herd.

He was expecting thousands of lifeless eyes to turn towards him. But they don't. Not a single walker had heard, the noise from the herd helping to cover the sound and leave them unsuspecting to their attack.

Two down, what seemed like a few thousand to go...

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Clementine watches as the ground team begin their part of the plan, having dispersed to the edges of the herd and begun picking them off. She wants to say she had kept an eye on them equally, but that would be a complete and utter lie. It was no surprise really that she felt her gaze drawn to Louis and Jack over and over again, holding onto an impossible fear that the second she took her eyes off them, they would be gone.

She can't do that to the others though, it's much too unfair. If she wants this to work, she had to follow her own plan just as the others are, make sure she's doing _her_ part.

And so, she slides the bow off of her back, keeping her eyes on the herd below as she reaches back once again to grab an arrow, effortlessly sliding it into place and drawing back the string, taking aim at a random walker in the middle of the herd.

She releases just as she feels her arms begin to shake from the effort, and watches the brief seconds the arrow whistles through the air before impaling into the walkers head, said walker dropping to the floor.

As she goes to grab another arrow from the quiver on her back, she noticed Nathan watching her from a neighbouring tree. Upon seeing her looking at him, he raises a hand in a thumbs up once again. For a brief moment, she wonders if he was putting the thumbs up in a way of congratulating her for the kill, but as he keeps his thumb in the air and his eyes on her, she realises he's instead checking up on her, making sure she's okay.

Once she returns the thumbs up, Nathan drops his hand back down to the rifle on his lap, his eyes now back and focused on the herd below, forefinger resting just to the side of the trigger, ready to pull in a moments notice. She can't help but wonder if he's bored, having nothing to do but sit and watch for however long this takes. Then again, it was pretty much guaranteed for the walkers to begin to take notice at some point. As much as she hated it, she was sure Nathan was going to have to use that rifle at some point in the day.

Clementines not entirely sure how long they had been at it now. A few hours at this point, though it felt like longer. The main part though was that their plan was _working._ The herd and slowly but surely been dwindling, watching as the ground team slowly closed further and further in to the middle, leaving a field of dead walkers behind them as they pushed forward.

Not only on the outskirts, but in the centre, too. Countless walkers laid sprawled across the ground, arrows sticking out of their heads (and a few in their chests, from those that had misaimed).

There was still plenty to go, but she was honestly suprised it had gone as well as it had, that they had done as much as they had without even having to fire a single bullet

Of course, it's as soon as this thought crosses her mind that everything kicks off.

A single gunshot, from somewhere to her right. She nearly drops the arrow she had begun to remove from the quiver, eyes snapping over to the direction of the gunshot, feeling a weight settle in her stomach when she realises that it was where she had last seen Louis and Jack.

And now she can't see them at all through the swarming walkers.

"You see them?!" Nathan shouts out across to her, rifle raised and scanning the treeline ahead of him.

"No!" She shouts back, continuing to prepare the next arrow.  
"The herd are moving that way!"

"Then that's probably where they are! We have to start firing, clear out what we can!"

"We can't! I can't see where the others are, you might hit them! It's too risky!"

"We don't have a choice!" Nathan yells in retaliation.  
"They'll be overrun if we do nothing! My men are good shots, you have to trust in their aim!"

Every instinct in her body is screaming at her not to, and yet at the same time knows that Nathan is absolutely right. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, the decision to shoot or not to shoot both as likely to get the others killed.

She doesn't have a choice.

"Do it!"

The sounds all happen in order. First, the cocking of Nathan's rifle, then his yell across the forest to open fire. Then, it's nothing but the deafening roar of gunfire, their automatic weapons making a quick job of the herd. The walkers fall in waves, starting at those closest to them, and so furthest away from where they thought the ground team would be.

It was almost like a horror movie. She wanted nothing more than to close her eyes and block it all out, but at the same time was unable to tear her eyes away from the carnage unfolding just below her. She wasn't entirely sure what is it she was watching for. Did she even want to catch a glimpse of Louis down there? To see that he's alright, only to see him be struck by a loose bullet?

The bow in her hands seemed pointless now. Only able to take out a waker every ten seconds or though, where as it seemed as if Nathan and his gun were able to take out a walker every second? No, it seemed pointless to be up here.

She needed to be on the ground.

"NATHAN!" Clementine yells, voice cracking as she struggled to be heard over the gunfire.

Thankfully, Nathan hears, pausing in his firing to look over to her at her yell.

"I need you to clear out the walkers by my tree!"

Even from here, she can see the confusion in Nathan's face, sees the way her opens his mouth, ready to ask questions. But something on her face seems to give him pause, and he stares at her for a few moments before nodding, shifting on the branch he was sat on to aim down at the base of her tree, and open fire.

Clementine waits for the small amount of time it takes for Nathan to take out the walkers closest before holstering her bow once again, beginning her climb down the tree.

She lands harshly, hurrying too much to care about a careful landing. She fights through the pain on her stump, the landing having pushed the prosthetic harshly into her closed wound.

It doesn't matter though. Not right now.

She has to find him.

Her body seems to go into some sort of auto pilot, brain focused on searching for Louis as her body does the work for her, arms automatically raising the knife in her hand to slice through the walkers that had taken notice of her.

She doesn't even know how many she killed, not even blinking at the walker blood that was slowly drying on her clothes, the knife in her hand becoming slick with the dark liquid.

At least, she doesn't, until she realises there are no more for her _to_ kill. The roaring of her blood past her ears had blocked out the roaring of the gunfire, and it was only now that she took the time to simply _stop_ that she realised the gunfire had stopped. That there were no walkers in sight.

And still, there was no Louis.

"Louis?!" She yells desperately to the forest around her, not caring in the slightest that she was being too loud.

She would take care of any walkers that emerged.

"Louis?!" She yells once again, stumbling forward in a random direction, nearly tripping over the bodies on the floor, hoping that one of them wouldn't be _him_

"LOUIS!?"

She can hear the desperation in her own voice, hear the tears that made her throat feel thick and heavy, not even bothering to fight off the sheer panic and terror that was beginning to take her over.

A pair of stumbling footsteps, that take her a moment to realise aren't her own. She spins in the direction of the sound, and nearly sobs in relief when she's a shaky looking Louis headed towards her, clutching a hand to his shoulder as he looks wildly around the forest, relief spreading across his face when he spots her.

"Clem" He utters her name, and she can hear the exhaustion in his voice as he bumbles towards her.

She drops her knife to the floor once they meet, wrapping her arms around him as tightly as she can, burying her face into his chest despite the walker blood that soaked his jacket, needing to feel that he was actually there, that was he actually alive.

For once, Louis makes no jokes, no quip about how he'd suffocate if she kept hugging him so tight, instead keeping one arm wrapped around her just as tightly, resting his chin on her head and taking the time to simply breathe.

That's when she remembers he was holding his shoulder.

She pushes herself away from him, which seems to startle him slightly at the sudden movement. Yet still, he still has one hand firmly gripped on his left shoulder.

"Lou, what happened?" Clementine can barely keep the tremble out of her voice as she points to his shoulder.

Her heart deflates when she sees the brief flicker of terror in his eyes when he glances down at his own shoulder, watching his Adams apple bob in his throat as he swallows nervously.

"I don't really know, I... One of them got me, but... I couldnt really _feel_ it _,_ so I don't know if..."

Clementine doesn't let him finish, already tearing off his jacket and tossing it to the floor. Furious tears burn on her eyes when she sees the tear in the sleeve of his green under shirt. She was angry, not at him of course, it wasnt his fault, but at... Everything.

"Clem, don't-"

She yanks the sleeve back, holding her breath as she looks to the canvas of skin in front of her, already preparing for the worst.

But there's no blood. There's a barely visible indentation of teeth marks, but it hadn't broken the skin.

He wasn't bit.

This time, she does sob in relief, burying her head back into his chest once more as the relief watches over her.

"Oh thank God, you're not bit. You're okay, you're okay..."

"Im okay..." Louis repeats, as if he can't quite believe it himself.

"I'm okay." He says again, this time firmer, more certain.  
"I'm okay. You're okay. Everything's okay. I think the walker couldn't bite past my jacket."

"I can't believe your dumb jacket saved your life." She mutters into his chest, though part of it comes out as a sob.

"You think it's dumb?"

Apparently she needed his stupid, badly timed jokes more than she thought she did, part sob-part laugh escaping her throat.

"I wasn't sure if I was... I mean, I didn't feel any pain. I could feel it _biting,_ though. Felt the pressure. That's when..."

She feels Louis stiffen under her, and quickly pulls away to look up at him, seeing how his face has quite suddenly gone pale.

"Louis? What's wrong?"

"Jack saved me. He was the one who fired first. I was taking out a walker and one snuck up behind me, started to bite and then... Jack fired just as it bit down. When I turned around to find him, all I could see was the walkers."

"Did you look for him?"

"I _tried._ There were so many walkers. I was trying to fight them off, and that's when the gunfire started. There were so many of them, so I climbed a tree. I shouldn't have done that, why didn't I go after him-"

"No, you did what you were supposed to do. I'm sure Jack did the same too, we just have to go out a find him."

"I feel like a coward, he saved my life and I abondened him..."

"Clementine!"

Nathams voice from behind them startles them both, whirling round to see Nathan heading in their direction.

"I think we did it" Nathan continues with a relieved chuckle, throwing his arms out in the air in celebration.  
"Seems that most of the herd is gone. We've started to recover the crates, shouldn't take too long."

"Is everyone else okay?" Clementine asks warily, hope in her chest that everyone was alive and well considering Nathan's chipper tone.

"Everyone's accounted for, they're busy pulling out the crates. I assumed Jack was with you? "

Clementine and Louis glance worriedly at one another, and the realisation seemed to hit Nathan.

"He's not with you?"

A gunshot echoes from within the forest, and the three of them barely glance at one another before racing in the direction of the gunshot, Clementine quickly scooping up her knife from the ground as she hurries after them.

Theres another gunshot from somewhere up ahead, and she doesn't know whether to take that as a good sign or a bad sign. One thing she was sure of though; it was louder, meaning they were getting closer, heading in the right direction.

"There!"

Clementine comes to a stop and Nathan's shout, following where his finger was pointed to a figure slumped on the floor by a tree, a pile of dead walkers around them. The relief lasts for only a few seconds upon seeing its Jack, replaced with an all too familiar feeling of dread as she gets a better look at him.

Even from here she could hear the ragged, gurgling breaths he took, chest shaking with the effort of each inhale. His eyes were closed, whether it was from exhaustion or from pain, she didn't know.

His hand was wrapped tightly around the right side of his neck, near where it meets the shoulder, and she could see the blood that steadily oozed from between his fingers. It makes her feel sick when she realises she can see the blood pulse from between his fingers in time with his heart beat.

He would be gone in minutes.

"Oh, fuck" Louis says from beside her, his sprinting having come to an arubpt halt, frozen in space at the sight of Jack.

Clementine gently kneels by his side, and Jack opens his eyes upon noticing her presence. He looks to her for only a moment before his gaze slips to something behind her.

"Sorry, boss" Jack wheezes out to Nathan, who was slowly leaning down to kneel by Jack's other side.  
"Couldn't fight 'em all off"

Nathan doesn't say anything in response, giving a barely there nod of his head.

Jack watches him for a few seconds more before he looks over to Louis, who had remained frozen in the horrified state he found himself in upon seeing Jack. Though once he feels Jack's eyes on him, he forces himself out of the trance.

"Fuck, Jack, I... I'm so sorry. I should have done something, if I didn't-"

"There was nothing you could do" Jack interrupts him, wincing at the pain of talking.  
"You would have just gotten yourself killed, and I couldn't let that happen. I said if get you through this, didn't I"

This only deepens the pain Clementine was feeling, a part of her feeling guilty for not getting to know Jack more. Now, there was nothing she could do but watch as he fades away.

Even Nathan seems suprised by Jack's promise, glancing over to Louis for a moment before returning his gaze back to Jack.

"Yeah. Yeah, you did. Thanks, Jack. You saved my life back there"

"Sir, the crates have all been dragged out, everyone's ready to start--Jack?"

Clementine had never heard such emotion from a single word, not least coming from Alex. His tone had gone from monotonous to grief stricken in just one word, and she wasn't sure if she could handle looking at Alex's face, matching the grief stricken voice to the face.

The foot steps that approach are uneven and heavy, and she has to stop herself from flinching at the body that suddenly appears out of the corner of her eye as Alex drops to his knees in front of his brother.

"--W-Wha... You... How?"

Jack tries to say something in response to Alex's confused ramblings, but all that comes out is a horrific gargling sound. He clenches his eyes shut, leaning forward and opening his mouth, and Clementine has to push down the vomit that threatened to rise when she sees the pool of blood slip out from his mouth before he coughs harshly, wincing at the way she could hear his blood that was blocking up his lungs.

"Too... Much... Couldn't..." Is all Jack can get out, voice barely over a whisper now.  
"I'm... Sorry..."

"What are you apologising for?" Alex croaks out in ask

"For... Leaving... You..."

Alex curses quietly under his breath, suddenly standing from his crouched stance and pacing over to a nearby tree, hand over his mouth as he struggles to calm himself. Jacks eyes sluggishly follow his brother for a moment before lookimg to Nathan. Their eyes meet for a moment and then Jack nods, leaning his head back against the tree and closing his eyes.

Clementine sees the glint of something metal as the midday sun reflects off whatever Nathan had pulled out of his pocket, and she only just realises that it's Nathan's pistol before they're nearly defeaned by the gunshot from right next to them as Nathan fires the bullet into Jacks head.

Louis gasps from next to her, stumbling away from the sight of Jacks skull now blown across the tree behind him, his hand dropping from his neck head slumping over to the side from the force of the bullet.

Clementine stares open mouthed as Nathan as he calmly puts the pistol back in his pocket, standing from the body and muttering a soft "Goddamit" under his breath.

"You shot him..." Clementine mumbles, head whipping from Nathan to Jacks corpse.

"I know. I know, it seems awful. That's just how we do things here. We say our goodbyes and we end it as quick as possible. Jack was suffering, I couldn't let him be in pain any longer. He knew what was going to happen."

"But... But Alex..." Louis tries to ask, glancing worriedly to Alex who was still pacing nearby.

"-Will understand. Maybe not right now, but eventually. It's our procedure, in the event of a lethal bite. You never know how quick someone can change after the bite, how quickly they can attack someone else. We don't take that kind of risk."

Clementine and Louis startle at the strangled yell they hear come from Alex as he suddenly stops pacing, ripping his rifle off his back and throwing it away into the forest. He pulls his knife out from his pocket, grabbing a random walker nearby on the ground and slashing at it again and again and again, sending sprays of blood all over the place.

"Alex!" Nathan yells, rushing over to him and grabbing hold of his shoulder and pulling him up to face him, grabbing the knife from his hands and tossing it aside.  
"I know you're upset, but you need to calm down!"

"No!" Alex snaps back, eyes ablaze in fury and devastation.  
"I'm tired of it! Of covering up with this bullshit! I can't!"

"And I get that! I get it! But you Need. To Get. A Grip. You can't do this, not now, not after everything. Now is not the time for this, you can find time to grieve later. We're not done here yet."

Alex seems to deflate with every word, his shoulders slowly beginning to sag as the fight drains out of him. He shrugs himself out of Nathans grips, snatching up his knife from the ground and pocketing it safely. 

"I'll help start loading the crate" He tells Nathan, his monotone voice back as it usually is.

"I'll catch up in a second." Nathan replies, Alex marching away from where he had came from.

"Do you guys need any help with the crate, maybe use our horse?" Louis asks, feeling the need to help in whatever way they can.

"No. No, thank you. Our RV's not too far away, we can just... Load the stuff up and be on our way. I think... I think its best I get everyone home as quick as possible."

"We really are sorry." Clementine apologises.

"Thank you. Jack was... He was a good soldier, one of my finest" Nathan mutters, looking over to where Alex was steadily disappearing into the woods. 

"We won't be able to take him home with us. I hate to ask but... Do you think you could take care of him?" Nathan asks, glancing down to Jacks corpse.

"Of course. It's the least we can do."

Nathan gives a small smile in thanks, sighing deeply from his mouth before rubbing a tired hand over his eyes.

"Same meeting time as usual, same place."

"You sure?" Clementine asks.  
"We'll understand if you guys aren't up for trading for a bit-"

"No, no. We've got to keep things running, no matter what happens. I'll... see you guys soon."

And with that, Nathan glances at Jack one last time before turning on his heel, heading off in the direction they had seen Alex go, stopping briefly to pick up Alex's discarded weapons, leaving Clementine and Louis alone in the forest.

"Alright" Louis breaks the silence they had found themselves in, stepping by Jacks side and gently beginning to raise him by his shoulders, waiting for Clementine to go round the other side to pick him up by his legs.  
"Let's bring Jack home."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The week had already been a stressful one. Violet knew that there was no way she was going to be going on the mission, and she had accepted that. Which is why it was weird that once the day came, she was filled with disappointment when nearly everyone from the school left, leaving her, Ruby and AJ behind to hold the Fort in their absence.

Usually the days went by quick, too occupied with whatever task Clementine had issued them for the day. She'd start the day with her hands in the soil, working in the greenhouse, and the next she'd hear Omar yelling at them that dinner was ready to be served.

Now though, she was trying to carry out chores around the school without thinking too much about how the others were doing out by the boat, the anxiety within her increasing with every minute they hadn't returned.

It peaked, of course, when they heard the trotting of a horse approaching. The happiness and relief she felt upon seeing everyone return with a cage of crates behind them, then the fear that had risen upon seeing the body laid out on the crates.

Everyone had stopped what they were doing, racing forward, unsure as to who it was laid out in the cage. Ruby was crying in relief upon seeing an exhausted but very much alive Aasim hobble through the gates, enveloping him in a hug Violet was sure Aasim wouldn't be able to escape from for at least a few minutes. Truth be told, Aasim looked like he needed it as much as Ruby did.

AJ had raced forward to find Clementine and Louis, and Violet smiled at the sight of Louis immediately dropping down to this knees to give AJ a hug before standing back up and pulling both him and Clementine in for a ~~group~~ _family_ hug, everyone relived to see everyone back home alive and safe.

James, Omar and Willy made their way out of the cage, all three soaked head to toe in walker blood. James walked by them without so much as a greeting, and Violet could understand. She knew how difficult James found it to harm walkers, so she couldn't even begin to imagine how he was feeling right now, other than knowing he needed some space for a bit.

Finally, she spots Zara from behind everyone else, looking just as tired and blood soaked as the rest.

' _Screw hiding my emotions'_ Violet thinks to herself, marching towards Zara with purpose. Zaras downcast expression seems to brighten once she catches sight of Violet, and she's unable to get a word out before Violet had yanked her towards her, wrapping her up in a hug.

"Sorry" Violet was already apologising, squeezing her closer.  
"You have no idea how worried I was."

"Its fine." Zara mumbles into her shoulder, getting over the initial shock to return the hug.  
"I think I needed this... Its been one hell of a day."

Zara pulls away after saying this, looking over her shoulder to the cage. Violet follows her line of sight, able to make out that Clementine and Louis had begun to pull the corpse out from the back of the cage.

She recognised him. She didn't know him well, but had seen him a few times she had gone with the others to meet up with Nathan and his people.

Even when you don't really know the person, it never makes adding another grave to the graveyard any easier.

Willy, who was gratefully accepting the hug that AJ was giving him now he had had his fill with Clementine and Louis, peeked over at Omar who heading over to Clementine and Louis, helping them to carry the body out from the cage and towards the graveyard.

Violet sees Willy lean over and murmer something to AJ, and after a nod of agreement from AJ, the two of them head in the direction of the door to the basement, disappearing inside.

"Come on, we should go help" Zara says, tugging at Violets hand to lead her towards the graveyard.

They arrive just as Clementine and Louis are lowering the body to the ground, Omar having left them to go grab the one shovel they have. Once Omar gets close enough, Louis immediately sticks his hand out for the shovel, to which Omar diligently hands it over.

"Do you guys want help?" Violet asks, noticing the rather somber look on Louis' face as he stares down at the shovel in his hand.

"No. I should be the one to do this." Louis replies quietly, tightening his grip on the shovel.

"Louis, I know what you're thinking. And it's _not_ your fault. It's _not._ You don't have to punish yourself for this."  
Clementine tries to assure him, reaching a hand out to take the shovel from him.

"But it _was,_ Clem. I should have paid more attention, if I hadn't gave gotten into trouble then Jack wouldn't have had to help. He wouldnt be like... Like _t_ _his."_

"It doesn't matter how much you were paying attention, or how skilled you were. If there were too many, there were too many. You couldnt have avoided that."

Louis' shoulders slump, and he shakes his head, shifting his hold on the shovel before pushing it down into the dirt, lifting it back up and flinging the loose soil the side.

"Doesn't matter. Either way, if it wasn't for me, Jack would still be alive right now. I should be the one to do this."

Clementine has nothing to say to this, watching Louis dejectedly, knowing there's nothing else she can do to stop him from punishing himself over something that was out of his control. Instead, all she can do is stay by his side, and be there for him when he needs it.

It's not until Louis finishes digging the hole that the others begin to gather around the new grave. Clementine and Louis grab ahold of Jack's body as they did before, gingerly placing him down in the ground before stepping back.

As Louis continues to pick up the loose soil with the shovel, Zara is the first to pick up one of their cups and begin to pick up some of the soil herself, slowly bit surely helping to fill up the grave alongside Louis. No words are said, everyone in agreement to start helping at this part, grabbing their own utensils to help.

They're all so occupied that they nearly don't notice Willy and AJ return to the group, AJ holding an awfully familiar looking object in his hands.

Violet wondered how many more crosses AJ and Willy were going to have to make.

"I wasn't too sure who he was... I always get the two mixed up..." AJ admits guility, handing the cross over to Louis.

Louis takes the cross and flips it over to read the name, smiling with a small huff once he sees it.

"You got it this time, little man." Louis says, bending over to push the cross into the top of the new grave, the setting sun reflecting off the freshly carved **"JACK"** across the cross.

"Sorry we couldn't get you home, Jack." Clementine speaks softly once Louis reaches her side  
"I hope you can find rest in ours instead"

"I wish I could have done more for you, Jack. I'll make sure to get to know Alex a little better, keep an eye out for him. I'm sure it'll be the other way round though" Louis says with a small, sad smile.

Violet glances over to Zara, taken by surprise by the grief she could see on her face, especially for a person she hadn't really known outside the occasional meetings they had for trading. Then again, Violet was rarely with Zara on those trading meetings, so perhaps she had got to know Jack better than she thought.

She recognised the look in Zaras eyes, however. Looking, but not really seeing. She was trapped in her own mind, unable to escape the whirl of thoughts she was stuck in.

"Zara?" Violet whispers in a low tone, lightly jabbing her with her elbow to bring her back to the present.  
"You wanna say anything?"

Zara blinks confusedly, realising the others were looking to her expectantly. She's about to say no when she realises that actually, yes, she should probably say something. Clearing her throat, she takes a small, timid step towards the grave.

"Hey, Jack. I, uh... I've never done this before, so don't really know what I'm doing, but... Just want to say that... While I didn't really know you all that well, you seemed to be a good man from what I could tell. A good man, and a good brother, whose current state I can't even begin to imagine what is right now.  
I hope you're happy wherever you are. I hope you've found your peace."

They were all taken by surprise at the sight of tears trailing down Zaras face, barely having time to see them before Zara is angrily wiping them away. When she's unable to stop more from falling, she quickly turns away and walks off in the direction of the school.

Nearly everyone watches her go in a mixture of sympathy and bewilderment, wondering what it is that could have set her off so much. As she said herself, she didn't know Jack all that well.

Violet watches her go, torn between wanting to comfort her and give her some space. Though when she catches Clementines eye and sees the obvious look of "go after her", she quickly turns on her heels and goes chasing after Zara.

It's not hard to figure out where Zara had gone, since their bedroom door was the only door in the dormitory that had been closed shut. While she would usually walk into her own room without a second thought, this time she gives the courtesy of knocking on the door, the silence after the knock seemingly stretching on forever.

Hoping Zara wouldn't be too mad at her, she gently swings the door open, immedietly spotting Zara sat on her bed, hunched with her face in her hands. She hadn't seen Zara this vulnerable since they had first met.

"Hey" Violets begins quietly, gingerly approaching Zaras bed.  
"I hate it when people ask me this because it's a stupid question but... Are you alright?"

This at least gets a small laugh out of Zara, though it sounds more like a huff than anything. It does get her to drop her hands from her face though, revealing her red rimmed, bloodshot eyes.

"I don't even know, Vi."

"You said you didn't know Jack all that well?" Violet asks, getting a slow nod from Zara as an answer.

"It's not..." Zara trails off, letting out a sigh of frustration.  
"Honestly, it's stupid. What's got me so upset."

"Tell me." Violet replies earnestly

"I've never been to a funeral before. Kind of took me by surprise _how...nice_ it is. How respectful. Even though none of us really knew him, and he didn't really know us."

"You're old group didn't do funerals? What happened when someone died?"

"It would usually happen while they were outside on a scouting mission, or a raid, something like that." Zara says.  
"If something happened while out there, their bodies were usually left behind."

"What if someone died inside the camp?"

"The people of my old group didn't have the same respect as you guys do for eachother. Someone dying wasn't a big deal, it was treated more like losing a piece of equipment. You'd just chuck it out and replace it with a new one."

"Thats horrible..."

"It got me thinking. How I've never been to a funeral before. How I never got to give one to my dad." Zara whispers the last sentence, voice starting to crack as she got near the end.

"He never got that. Never got to be buried with dignity, had kind words spoken about him by those who loved him. Instead he was left in the middle of the woods for the fucking walkers to pick at."

Zara had begun crying silently again, though this time her face was twisted with rage.

"Those bastards took him away, and I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye."

Violet places a hand on Zaras back, not knowing what else she can do to comfort her. As she sits and watches Zara succumb to her grief, a thought flickers to life in her head.

"What was his name? Your dad, I mean?"

Zaras looks taken aback by the ask, partly not expecting the ask, but also for realising she had never actually mentioned his name.

"Connor" Zara answers, her voice barely able to be heard.

Violet nods, continuing to comfort Zara by rubbing her back. Seems that she was going to have to visit Willy, and ask him for a favor.


	13. Chapter 13

The next morning, they were all stood around where the crates had been piled up, sat untouched until now. Clementine was at the forefront, crowbar in hand, ready to finally find out whether it had all been worth it.

"Clem, if you don't open these crates, I might die from the anticipation."

Louis gets a shove from Violet for the comment, but strangely, it does kick Clementine into action. She tightens her grip on the crowbar as she steps towards the nearest crate, shoving the end of it into the lid of the crate. With a quick push down, she hears the wooden lid splinter and strain from the force, splitting apart from the crate.

The crowbar is dropped to the floor, now grabbing the sides of the lid and heaving it off to the side, kicking up a cloud of dust as it lands on the floor. Clementine glances into the contents of the crate just as the others step forward, crowding around to get a look for themselves.

"Holy shit..." Willy whispers in awe, resisting the urge to put his hands into the crate.

"That's a lot..." AJ says, excitement creeping into his voice.

"Guys? You're forgetting I can't really see here, what are we looking at?"  
Violet cuts in, irritation lacing her voice.

Various firearms were laid out within the crate, clearly having been scavenged from elsewhere, whether it be from The Delta lucking out, or forcefully taking the weapons in one of their raids. The latter seemed more likely...

"Guns. And a lot of them." Aasim answers, hands now resting on the edge of the crate, too nervous to actually grab one from out of the box.

"Sure, there's a lot, but... Where's the ammo?" Ruby asks, unable to spot any bullets that they had expected to see alongside the guns.

"Maybe its just the guns? They probably have plenty of ammo back at their base, maybe they didn't need it?" James said.

"Nah, no way. They were at war, right? They'd need all the ammo they can get" Willy replies.

"Who _doesn't_  need ammo? No such thing as too much ammo." Zara tells them.

"So, what? The Delta scavanaged around, found a crap ton of guns and ammo, and just decided not to take the ammo?" Violet asks

"Or maybe they didn't find _any._ They could always have only found the guns." Louis replies

"That doesn't make a lick of sense..." Ruby mutters.

_"Or"_ Clementine cuts in, stood next to a crate that she had opened without them noticing, too wrapped up in their discussion.  
"Maybe it's in one of the crates we haven't opened yet?"

There's a moment in which everyone stands and stares at Clementine, blinking slowly as the realisation dawns on them, looking from Clementines unimpressed (though slightly amused) expression to the crate next to her.

Shockingly enough, Clementine is right. Inside the crate are boxes of ammo that have been haphazardly thrown into the crate, along with loose bullets that must have fallen out of their boxes during the whole, uh, _'explosion'_  thing.

"Was this crate in the water?" Aasim asks as he picks up one of the boxes on the top of the pile, feeling for any dampness.

"Don't think so. At least, it doesn't look like it. It's pretty banged up though, so seems it was thrown a bit from from the explosion. Probably one of the crates that was left out on the piers."

"Good thing it wasn't _on_  the boat. All this gunpowder, plus that bomb? Yeah, that wouldn't have been a pretty sight..." Louis comments, glancing worriedly to the ammo in front of him.

"Some of the guns might be a bit waterlogged, but they'll still work. Clementine tells them as she reaches into the gun crate, pulling out an old looking pistol and inspect it over.

"Work for what?" Louis asks, staring down at his hand when Clementine places the pistol into it.

"For shooting practice, of course."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It didn't take Willy too long to haphazardly put together some targets for them to shoot at. Really, all he needed to do was cut up some of spare bits of wood he was using (which he absolutely refused to tell Violet what he was using it for when she asked, even going so far as to deny her entrance into the basement when she offered to help).

After quickly cutting off a few pieces and slapping on some spare paint they had lying around in the basement, they had some fairly 'targetish' looking targets to shoot at.

"What? You see if you can do any better in less than an hour" Willy has huffed upon seeing the less than enthusiastic reactions of everyone when he has first brought the targets out.

"Thanks, Willy. These'll work perfectly." Clementine thanked him, not at all caring about their slightly shoddy appearance.

Clementine strung them up around the school, making sure they were spaced out enough so that everyone had enough space when shooting. The others stood by and watched as she worked, not having a clue as to what they were supposed to do.

"Okay." Clementine announces once she hangs up the last target, catching all of their attention.  
"Who here knows how to shoot?"

Its not too much of a surprise that no one from the school puts their hands up. Everyone's glancing at one another to see who put their hands up, going one by one down the line.

James, AJ and Zara are the only ones with their hands up.

"I haven't fired one in a long time." James tells Clementine, slowly lowering his hand back down to his side.  
"The Whisperers preferred not to use guns. Too much noise."

"You remember enough to teach the others?" Clementine asks.

"I should do, yes. I might be a bit rusty, though."

Clementine nods, a smile on her face as her gaze moves to AJ, who looks exceedingly proud to be one of the few people that know how to shoot a gun.

"You up for teaching these guys a thing or two?" Clementine asks AJ, getting an enthusiastic nod in response.

"Yeah! Do you think they'll be able to shoot as good as me?"

_"No-one_  can shoot as good as you, little man." Louis praises AJ.

"You sure? Not even Clem?"

"Not even Clem." Louis confirms, glancing fearfully at Clementine.  
"And I am so going to pay for that later..."

"Zara, you able to teach as well?" Clementine asks, electing to ignore Louis' comment.

"Maybe? I'm okay, not great. Dad only taught me a bit after we escaped and well, ammo was tight. Couldn't really waste it on practice."

"Alright, good. We'll need someone to stay on watch to take out any walkers that are attracted to the noise." Clementime informs the group, scanning them for who should go on first watch.

"Sorry Omar, you mind going first? We'll switch you out with someone else in about 30 minutes."

"It's no problem." Omar waves off her apology, heading over to the watch tower.   
"See you guys in a bit."

"So, how are we doing this?" Ruby asks.

"Well, two of you are going to have to go as team so we can spread out the 'teachers' enough. Aasim and Ruby, I'll teach you. James, you can teach Willy and then Omar when he gets back. Zara, you can watch over Violet and AJ can teach Louis."

"Wait, you're teaching _me_ how to shoot?" Violet asks incredulously, having been seconds away from heading to one of the benches to watch the disaster that was surely about to unfold.

"Of course we are, why wouldn't we?" Clementine replies.

"I mean, I kind of don't have depth perception anymore? I can't even shoot a bow anymore, what makes you think i'll be any better with a gun?"

"We dont. That's why we're teaching you. So you can go out there and keep yourself protected."

"But... I can't s _ee_  what it is I'm shooting at. What if I accidently shoot one of you guys instead?"

"That's something we'll figure out later. It's important to me that we keep you safe."

Knowing there was no way to argue against that, Violet backs down, nodding in response.

"I think its best we start with pistols, just to get you guys started and get used to the feel of a gun and the way it fires." Clementine tells them as he heads over to the gun crate, picking out a few pistols and handing them out to the others.

"I don't think I need to tell you how dangerous these can be. Be careful of where you point your gun. You should never point your gun at something, unless you're prepared to kill it."

Everyone looks to their gun warily at this.

"Similarly, keep your finger off the trigger until you're ready to fire. You'd be suprised how easy it is to misfire." Clementine says as she begins digging around the ammo crate, making sure that everyone got the right type for their pistol.

They begin to split up as instructed; Louis heading over to the far left target with AJ, Violet being led by Zara to the far right target, and James and Willy idly chatting as they head over to one of the targets in the centre of the courtyard.

"You guys ready?" Clementine asks once she gets to Ruby and Aasim, the two of them looking to their weapons with puzzled expressions.

"I... I have no idea what I'm doing..." Aasim admits, looking helplessly from the gun to Clementine.

"Me neither..." Ruby agrees, turning the pistol around in her hand.

"That's why I'm here, isn't it?" Clementine says, holding out her hand for Aasims gun.

"First, make sure the safety is on if you're not going to fire it." Clementine instructs them, showing how the small switch on the side was pointing to "Safety: ON"

"Can't fire the gun, as there's no ammo loaded. So, we're going to press this button here-" Clementine presses the button in demonstration, catching the empty mag that slips out from the pistol.

"Then we take these-" She picks up the box of ammo, one by one removing the bullets and sliding them into the mag, stopping when she reaches the twelfth bullet. She takes the now full mag and pushes it up into the pistol until it makes a 'click' sound.

"And how do we do that quickly? Say if there's a bunch'a walkers around, or we're being shot at." Ruby asks.

"In the case of walkers, best not to fire too much anyway. Don't want to attract them with all that noise." Clementine answers.

"And for people?" Aasim asks.

"In the case of people... Well, if you think you're heading somewhere where there might be trouble, and you have the ammo for it, it's always best to bring some pre-loaded mags. Better than carrying around loose ammo, that's for sure." Clementine says as she flips the pistol over, showing them the safety once more.

"When you're ready to shoot, you switch that to off. Then you just-"  
Clementine grabs the tops of the gun, cocking it backwards before falling into her shooting stance, aiming down the sights to the target in front of her.

"Pull the trigger."

She does just this, firing a bullet nearly perfectly into the bullseye, slightly to the left of it. Satisfied with it for now, she flips the safety back on before offering the handle of the gun back to Aasim.

"Careful, the barrel gets hot after firing it." She warns him.

Ruby pauses in loading her ammo into her guns mag when she sees Aasim prepare to shoot, adjusting himself slightly every now and then to try and perfectly copy Clementines stance.

"You don't need to copy it to the tee, Aasim. Just do what makes you feel comfortable."

Aasim nods, flicking the safety off before raising the gun up, aiming at the target in front of him.

He fires.

And the bullet rips through the top right of the target.

Ruby whoops at the same time Clementine congratulates him, pleased to see how quickly he was picking it up. Aasim stares down at the target, stunned to see he had actually managed to *hit* the thing.

"I was hoping your good aim would pass over to when firing the gun. Even though a bow is _completely_ different." Clementine tells him.

"You ready, Ruby?" Aasim gently asks Ruby, noticing how nervous she seemed handling the gun.

"I'll give it a shot..." Ruby unconfidently replies, stepping up to where Aasim had shot from, taking the time to focus and aim.

Clementine and Aasim stand side by side, smiling as they watch Ruby also manage to hit the target first time. It had barely made the target, just clipped the bottom, but was a hit none the less.

"Is it really bad I'm hoping Louis will miss so I can rub this in his face?" Aasim leans to the side slightly to whisper to Clementine.

Louis was staring down at the pistol in his hand in disdain. Everyone had been nervous to shoot the gun, and he was no different. What was different is that despite everyone's nerves, they still wanted to at least give it a try.

He absolutely did not.

"It's not going to hurt you, you know." AJ says from next to him, noticing the internal battle that seemed to be going on in Louis' head  
"So long as you don't do something stupid, anyway."

"Yeah, yeah, very funny wise guy" Louis mutters under his breath, flipping the pistol over in his hands.  
"So what do I do, exactly? How do I- Oh, shit"

Louis fumbles with the mag that had had slipped from the gun, the two of them watching as it drops to the ground with a small 'thud'.

A beat passes.

"Did I break it?"

AJ huffs in response to this, grabbing the mag up from the floor and peering inside for damage.

"Nope. You found the button to release the mag, though." AJ tells him, grabbing at a box of ammo nearby.

"... And... I was supposed to do that?" Louis asks as AJ begins loading the bullets into the mag, giving Louis a clear view as he does do.

"You mean drop the mag on the floor?" AJ asks with a teasing smirk.

Dammit, he really _was_ a bad influence on the kid.

"Maybe it's a new tactic you don't know about. Distract the enemy with your incompetence, then strike!"

AJ doesn't seem to fall for it.

"Just shooting at them is probably better."

AJ hands him over the now loaded gun, pointing the safety out to him as he passes it over.

"If that's on, the gun won't shoot. You have to flip it off first, then fire"

"Wait, really? So what if I forget to take it off during a gun fight?"

"Don't?" AJ responds with a baffled look.

"Wow. I'll keep that in mind." Louis mumbles, flipping the safety off and raising the gun up, seconds away from squeezing the trigger.

"Wait"

AJ's voice nearly startles him into pulling the trigger before he was ready, glancing to the younger boy out of the corner of his eye.

"What?"

"You can't fire like that."

"Like what?"

"Your arms are straight out. It was the first thing Clem taught me. You try to fire like that, you're going to hurt your elbows."

"Oh" Louis says softly, bending his elbows slightly so they weren't as locked up.

"Will this do?"

AJ gives a little "mm-hm" hum in agreement, waiting for Louis to fire his first shot.

"Any other pieces of advice?"

AJ pauses for a moment to think.

"Make sure you're holding it tight enough."

"That's your advice?"

"The first time I fired a gun, it _r_ _eally_ hurt my hands. Clem warned me about how the gun forces back after you fire it, I can't remember what she called it though..."

"Recoil?"

"Yeah, that! It hurt so bad, I nearly dropped the gun."

"So....hold it tight?"

"Hold it tight."

Louis takes a shaky breath in, willing his hands to stop their small tremors, refusing to hold still with the unfamiliar weight. He lines up the sight as best he can over the target, and squeezes the trigger.

"Holy hell!" He yells once the gun fires, looking down to the pistol in his hand with a wince.  
"You weren't kidding about the recoil."

"You do get used to it after a while."

This does nothing to ease Louis' nerves. If it were up to him, this was something he would _never_  have to get used to.

"Anyway, what's my score?" Louis asks with a grin, looking over to the target he had shot at.  
"Did I-"

"Miss it completely?" AJ fills in the blanks, struggling to hide his smirk.  
"Kinda, yeah."

"Damn..."Louis whispers, deflating in dissapointment.  
"I was sure my amazing archery skills would pass over to this."

"But... You suck at a shooting with the bow?" AJ states, confusion lacing his voice.

"Aren't you supposed to be encouraging me? Not, y'know, kicking me while I'm down?"

"But I'm not kicking you?"

"No, not like- You know what? Nevermind. This is pointless."

"What? You can't give up, you've only shot once! I was _really_ bad the first time I tried shooting! Even _Clem_ missed the first time she tried."

"First of all, thank you for telling me that about Clem, it will make for great teasing material. Secondly, I didn't even _want_  to do this in the first place. Guns just... Aren't my thing."

Despite his young age, AJ is able to pick up the sudden change in tone in Louis' voice near the end of his statement. The mild irritation he had been feeling at Louis' eagerness to quit seemed to melt away, quickly replaced by a deep feeling of concern.

"You really don't like guns, do you?" AJ asks quietly, trying to keeps his voice low enough so the others wouldn't hear.

Louis sighs tiredly, placing the gun in his hand on a nearby table before taking a few steps back, as if wanting to put as much distance between himself and the gun as possible.

"No. I don't."

"Why?"

Louis sighs at the simple question, simple, yet complicated to explain.

"When I kill a walker, I use Chairles. When I make that decision to kill it, I have to walk up to that walker. I have to get close enough. I have to use force to swing that chair leg forward to kill it." Louis begins to explain, pausing for a moment before pointing to the gun he had placed down.  
"That right there? All I have to do is twitch my finger. That's it. One small movement, and a person could be _dead."_

_"Bad_  people. And monsters."

"Yeah, well, doesn't always go that way, does it?" Louis snaps, regretting his words instantly at the way AJ flinches away from him.

"Jeez, I... I'm sorry, kiddo. I didn't mean it like that. It's just that... Whenever I hold a gun, even see one, all I can see is Marlon and that damn hole in his head. I see Tenn. I see Dorian."

"Dorian?"

"That raider, back on the boat."

"But you weren't using a gun?"

No, I wasn't. But I still pulled a trigger. I _s_ _queezed_ with my finger by accident, and a woman died because of it."

AJ still has so many counter arguments to that, but, seeing the dejected look on Louis' face, instead decides best not ask and stay quiet.

"I just don't think this is a good idea" Louis mumbles to the quiet, turning to walk away and back into the school.

"I still miss him."

AJ's voice makes him freeze in his steps, turning back to face AJ with a questioning expression.

"I still have dreams about Tenn. Sometimes they're good, most of the time... Not..." AJ tells him.

"Why did you do it?" Louis asks near silently, afraid his voice would break and betray him if he dared go any louder.  
"You and Tenn were close, so why? Why did you pick _m_ _e?"_

Louis knew it was unlikely he would get an answer, as AJ usually did his best to avoid such questions. To his surprise though, AJ actually answers.

"I want to say that I didn't have time to think, but then I'd be lying. I had time. I knew I had to make a choice.  
Tenn was like... No, he _was_  my best friend. I didn't _want_  to kill him. He didn't deserve it. But it was between him and you.  
Tenn was my best friend but you... You're not my friend, exaxtly."

"Ouch" Louis jokes in a whisper, trying and failing to lighten the mood.  
"What am I then?"

"It's like..." AJ cuts himself off with an agitated huff, struggling to find the right words to explain himself.  
"I never knew my parents. Only stories from Clem, and even she didn't know them all that well. But she's always told me about how brave yet caring my dad was, and how strong willed my mom was.  
But to me, they were just stories. Clems the one thats been there since... Well, since I can remember. She's been the one to teach me all I know, to do all she can to make sure I'm safe, even if it means putting herself in danger. Clems the closest thing I'll ever get to having a mom.  
At first it was like... I don't know, you were kind of like a big brother. You liked to mess around and have fun with me, and that was different. But you're _not_ like a brother. Now... you're more like a dad to me. "

"I... Really?" Louis asks in disbelief.

"Yeah. You weren't afraid to tell me when I did something wrong."

"I was a little harsh..."

"But it _helped._ Helped me to understand how my decisions have con... Conse-"

"Consequences?"

"Yeah, that. You were willing to play games with me, show me the piano, show me how to be a normal kid. But you're also making sure I know right from wrong, to see things differently than just... How to stay alive.  
I miss Tenn every day. Knowing I had to shoot him to keep you alive hurt me so bad. But the thought of letting you die seemed so much worse. I _couldn't_ let you die."

AJ was sniffling now, fighting to keeps the tears that threatened to spill over at bay.

"Coz' I'd be losing more than a friend. I'd be losing the closest thing I have to a dad."

"Dammit, AJ..." Louis mumbled, immediately dropping down to a knee so he was at AJ's height, wrapping him up in a tight hug.  
"Why are you so good at making me cry?"

"Sorry" AJ apologises meekly into his shoulder.  
"Its _why_ I want to teach you how to shoot a gun. Why _Clem_  wants you to learn. If its something that helps keep you alive, then surely it's worth it?"

"I guess..." Louis concedes, knowing deep down that AJ was right, that this was a skill he was eventually going to have to learn.  
"Can't say I remember Clem wanting me to learn, though. She can't be _that_  worried."

The 'You've got to be kidding me' look AJ gave him return made him wish he had Zaras camera on him.

"Is that why Clem has been watching us for the past five minutes instead of teaching Aasim and Ruby?"

Louis whips his head round at this, finding that Clementine had indeed been ~~spying~~   _keeping tabs_ on them. Upon realising she had been caught, she quickly returns her gaze back to Aasim and Ruby, pretending she had been paying attention to them the whole time. (Even from here, Louis could see the faint dusting of red on her cheeks at being caught).

"I think we weren't supposed to notice" Louis leans over and whispers to AJ with a grin as Clementine walks over to check on James and Willy, this time doing everything in her power to now even _glance_  in his and AJ's direction.

"Alright" Louis suddenly declares, springing to his feet and grabbing the pistol from the table he had placed it down on earlier.  
"Teach me how to actually hit something with this thing"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It had taken Violet what felt like hours to fall asleep, and she was fairly certain she had only slept for about two hours before her over active brain had snapped her back into consciousness once more.

She had been replaying earlier today back in her head, of what happened for a brief moment during their shooting practice.

They were already fairly far behind at this point, everyone else having begun firing their first rounds and she was just finishing loading her mag into the pistol. (Personally, she thought being blind was a valid excuse for her being a bit behind everyone else).

"You seem super nervous about this" Zara had noted as she watched Violet handle the gun, whose focus flicked between the gun and Zara.

"Yeah, I guess I kinda am. Feel like this is something I would have been great at back when both eyes were working."

"Hey, don't feel discouraged if you don't get it first time, alright?" Zara voice suddenly dropping into a much more serious yet gentle way.

"Yeah, I'll keep that in-- Dammit!"

A round had slipped from her fingers to the floor where she had been trying to force it in wrong, unable to completly make out where it was she was putting it. Zara cautiously slipped the gun from her grip, loading the last few missing rounds for her.

"If you're that worried about it, I can always give you private shooting lessons." Zara said cheerily with a barely there, sly smile.

Violet glanced up at Zara, scanning her face to try and figure out the meaning behind what she had said. Was it done in a joking manner, referring back to their agreed 'private knife lessons'? Or was she actually extending an invitation for more lessons?

"I'm, like, 90% certain that all we'll see is me missing this target in private, instead of with everyone else." Violet replies, holding out a hand for Zara to give her the gun back.  
"It's almost like you're expecting something _else_  to happen when we're in private."

It was like her filter had been snatched away, letting her internal thoughts spill out. She hadn't realised what she had said, not at first. She regretted it almost immedietly after though, especially seeing how Zara seemed not to have expected it as much as she had, a few rapid blinks as she stared at Violet, making sure she had heard what she thought she had said.

But then, she _smirks._  An honest to God smirk that makes her unsure whether she should fixate on her or look absolutely anywhere else. Before she can decide though, Zara ever so slightly leans forward, her hand briefly skimming zcross Violets as she hands the pistol back over to her and then spoke in a low voice.

"Guess we'll never know until you shoot your shot."

And now here she laid in bed, trying to figure out what it _meant._ Violet wasn't one to flirt, certainly not with others around. Really, the only form of flirting she had seen was seeing Louis with Clementine, though she didn't really count that as it was just the way he acted towards _everyone._

So no, she wasn't a master at flirting, nor a master at knowing if someone was flirting with her. Yet, she felt like surely, _that_ was Zaras way of flirting, right?

Was Zara suggesting that she should be the one to make the first move, to put herself out there first? Or was she speaking quite literally, as in she'll never know if she hits the very real target they had been shooting at unless she takes the shot first?

This was much more complicated than it should be.

Giving up on the idea of sleep got tonight, Violet swings her legs over the side of the bed and pushes herself up, stretching away all the aches in her arms and legs. As she's doing this, she glances over to where she expects to see Zara sound asleep, only to do a double take to make sure she was seeing right.

Zara wasn't there.

While, granted, her eyes weren't what they were used to be, surely she would have seen Zara getting up in the middle of the night? Hell, even if she didn't, she was awake and alert enough to have been able to _hear_  her leave at the least.

Violet makes her way out to the hallways, having no idea as to where Zara might have gone. She could be anywhere in the school, and it wasn't exactly for Violet to find someone in the middle of the night with her condition. And it not like she could go shouting after Zara as well, assuming she doesn't want to wake up everyone else.

She begins to ponder why it is that Zara got up in the middle of the night. Nightmares, perhaps? Or maybe she's in the same boat as Violet, something on her mind that's keeping her up, and forcing her to wander.

She doesn't know where Zara would head in that kind of situation, so instead Violet heads where she herself goes when things all get a bit too much.

Outside.

The cool air is refreshing against her skin as she steps out to the main courtyard, although it's cold enough that she's certain it'll start to become uncomfortable after a while.

Peering around into the dark seems pointless, but there's not much else she can do. As she squints to try and see anything out in the courtyard, the squeaking of the gates makes her jolt, reaching in her pocket for a weapon that's not there.

The footsteps that approach pound in time with her heartbeat, and she's stuck between the urge to run for a weapon, or to stay put and see who it is that's just entered their school.

Violet decides she's better of staying where she is. This appears to be the right choice, as she begins to recognise the figure the closer they come to the lit torches near the building.

"Zara?"

Seems that Zara hadn't spotted her either, as she too startles, nearly tripping in her steps as she comes to a stop.

Zaras eyes immediately snap over to the soirce of the voice, and her entire posture relaxes once she sees that its Violet. Knowing she was no longer in danger, she makes her way towards the school steps, where Violet is waiting at the top.

"I was wondering where you-"

Not only did Zara getting closer to the light help Violet recognise her, it let her see Zaras face more clearly. More specifically, it let her see the red, puffy eyes and dried tear tracks on her face.

"Shit, are you okay?" Violet asks concernedly, unconsciously stepping closer to Zara once she reaches the top of the stairs.

" 'M fine" Zara brushes off her concern with a mumble, voice obviously hoarse from crying.  
" 'S just a bad dream, is all"

"I didn't hear you leave."

"I didn't want to wake you up and bother you."

"It's fine. I was awake anyway."

"Bad dreams too?"

"No, just... Something on my mind..."

They fall quiet after that, the both of the glancing to the door behind Violet, unsure whether to head back inside or not.

"You should at least take Rosie with you if you're going out the gates. Especially at night, that was really dangerous."

Zara signs heavily, rubbing at her temples as if nursing a headache before sliding her hand down her face.

"Sorry, didn't mean to worry you or anything. I..."

Zara sighs again, though it sounds more like a huff.

"It's stupid, really. I just needed to go somewhere and walk for a bit. Try not to disturb anyone."

"It's not stupid." Violet reassures her, sympathising with her reasoning completly.  
"I used to have a place I would go when shit like that happened. Bad dreams, bad thoughts, or just... Needing to get away from everyone for a while."

Shes expecting some more questions from Zara, but instead Zara is simply watching her, trying to decide something as she studies Violets face.

Its hard for Violet to decide whether she feels unnerved or flattered by the attention.

"I was going to do this later but... I think now is the perfect time."

"To do... What, exactly?" Violet asks anxiously, her heart in her throat."

"Except... Shit, might take a while..." Zara muttered to herself, glancing over to the side of the school building.  
"Alright, I need you to close your eyes."

"You need me to... Close my eyes?"

"Yep, and you cant open them till I say."

Violet gives her a baffled look, trying to figure out if Zara is being serious or not.

"Come on, I need you to promise me here. This is important."

"Okay, fine. I promise I won't open my eyes."

Her voice doesn't seem to reassure Zara, who squints at her suspiciously.

"I even cross my heart." Violet jokes.

"You promise?"

"Of course."

"What do you promise?"

"What do I... What?"

"You need to promise something important to you. That way I'll know you're taking this seriously."

"Somrthing important to me?"

"Yeah. What's important to you?"

She so wants to go the cheesy route and say "You", but in no way does she have the confidence for that, as well as the fact she's 100% certain it'll somehow backfire and she'll die right there from embarrassment.

"Uh, I don't know... Something important..."

"How about your other eye?"

Well, she certaintly wasn't expecting that.

"You want me to promise my eye?"

"The good one, the one that works best. You promise that, I'll have full faith you'll keep your promise."

"Fine" Violet concedes, pointing to her non-bandaged eye.  
"I promise _this_  eye right here that I will not peek at whatever you're doing."

"Until I say."

"Until you say."

"Good. Now, close your eyes."

Violet does as she says, closing her eyes with a slight shake of her head. She can hear Zaras footsteps leading away almost immediately as soon as she closes her eyes in the direction of the building she had glanced at earlier before. Her footsteps fade away, but it's only a few seconds before she hears the doors to the basement being swung open, then the unmistakable sound of footsteps heading down the concrete stairs.

So whatever it is Zara wanted to surprise her with was down in the basement? For some reason, this makes her feel oddly nervous.

She heads footsteps coming back _up_ the stairs, but not just footsteps. Zara is clearly dragging something up the stairs with her, judging by the scraping sound against the harsh stone of the stairs.

_Scrape_

_Thud_

_Scrape_

_Thud_

This repeats for a bit until finally, Zara makes it to the top of the stairs. Even from here, she can hear Zaras labored breathing, as whatever she's carrying must be heavy.

There seems to be a pause for rest, and then Zaras dragging the mystery item across the courtyard, steadily making her way right and in the direction of the grave yard.

Violet briefly entertains the idea that it's a body Zaras carrying, before realising how ridiculous it sounded even in her own head.

Unless...?

No, no its definitely not. Whatever it is that Zaras carrying seems to be too long for a body. And no, not because she's peeked, but because she can barely hear Zaras footsteps nor her heavy breathing, but she can still hear the end of the item behind dragged away to the right, right in front of her.

Doesn't take long for the dragging sound to too fall quiet, and then it's Violet standing alone on the top of the stairs to the main building, dead quiet with her eyes firmly closed.

"I swear, I will hit you so hard if you're leaving me to stand with my eyes shut in the dark all night." Violet announces to the night air, hoping Zara would hear her wherever she is, assuming she hasn't headed back inside the school that is.

"I'm not _that_  cruel" Zaras voice seems to appear from nowhere right next to her, and Violet flinches so hard she has to repress the urge to both open her eyes and punch Zara straight in the face.

"Jesus!" Violet hisses angrily, not at all happy about being spooked.  
"You can be damn quiet when you wanna be."

"It's a useful gift to have." Zara jokes, tapping at Violets right arm.  
"Oh, and you can open your eyes now. The surprise isn't here."

Violet opens her eyes to see that Zara was indeed telling the truth, as nothing appeared to have changed in the courtyard from what she could see.

Shes about to open her mouth to ask where the surprise _was,_ then Zara grabs her arm and begins tugging her in the direction of the graveyard.

Except, they don't stay at the graveyard. They turn right at the graveyard and there, on the floor next to the belltower is...

A ladder?

And a damn tall one, at that.

"I was going to do the whole "Ta Da!" thing and have the ladder already propped up against the tower, but uh... Realised I can't lift it on my own and might need your help..."

"You built... A ladder? For the bell tower?"

"Well... Yeah? It was mostly Willy, of course. The stairs seemed pretty fucked so I thought.."

Violet couldn't quite believe it. Could there possibly be a way for her to finally go back to her favorite spot once again, where she never thought she would be able to return?

"And before you ask, we already checked it. See if it was sturdy and wouldn't, like, break into pieces once you stepped on it. Or worse, once you were halfway up or near the top."

"How the hell did you do that without me seeing?"

"Waited till you were out fishing with others. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't find out for yourself. There were so many times I saw you head into the basement and was sure you'd find out. What the hell did Willy say to keep you out?"

"Its _Willy._ If he shouts at me to stay out of somewhere, I'm going to stay out"

"Fair enough" Zara says with a chuckle, approaching the ladder and grabbing hold of the side near the end

"Little help?" Zara asks

Violet grabs the opposite side slightly further down, and the two of them begin to lift after the count of three. It proves to be difficult, the ladder much heavier than it looks, which is a lot due to the fact that it already _looks_  heavy. They both strain under the weight as they shuffle closer to the wall, heaving the ladder up and forward until finally, gravity does its work. They let go and the ladder falls towards the wall, smacking into it at the top and shaking for a bit from the force before settling.

"Ready to go up?"

Violet looks up to the top of the ladder, swallowing past the lump in her throat. She had climbed up there countless of times before, but somehow seeing it like this made it seem like a _long_  way up.

"And you're certain it won't... Fall apart?"

"You saying you don't have any trust in Willy's abilities?" Zara laughs, standing beside the ladder as she waits for Violet to begin her climb.

"I'm just saying..." Violet defends herself, apprehensivly approaching the ladder, grabbing hold of the first few rungs before placing a foot on one of the lower rungs.

The ladder didn't shift when she put some weight on it, so that was a good sign.

"Don't worry, I'll catch you if you slip." Zara jokes with a teasing smirk, though it quickly slips off her face when she sees just how nervous Violet seems about climbing the ladder.

"Hey, it's secure, I promise you. There's no way I would let you climb it if I thought there was _any_  chance you could get hurt."

"Okay..." Violet said with a small nod, feeling oddly touched by the sincerity and worry in Zaras tone.

Violet begins her climb, bit by bit edging her way up the ladder and towards the top of the bell tower, one rung at a time. She relies mostly on feel rather than putting all her trust in her sight, feeling for the next step with her foot and making sure it was secure on the step before grabbing hold of the next rung with her hands and pulling herself up.

It's methodical, but it's also slow, and she knows it must feel like it's taking forever to Zara, but she doesn't say a thing. No complaints, and also no encouragements, which strangely enough, Violet prefers. She didn't want encouragements, as they would just distract her attention. She just wanted to focus on making sure she got to the top of the ladder without slipping.

After what feels like eternity, the next rung she goes to grab turns out to be the edge of the bell tower entrance. She places one hand flat on the ground in front of her and then grabs onto a divot in the wall further up with her other hand. She pulls herself up the side of the wall, throwing a leg over the side and dragging herself up, firmly planting both feet on the ground.

"God, I thought I was going to vomit part way up." Violet comments, doubled over to catch her breath.

"Well..." She hears Zara grunt from behind her, struggling to push herself up and over the top of the ladder.  
"I'm glad you didnt. I would have got soaked..."

Violet hurries over, offering a hand out to Zara who is quick to accept the help. Violet pulls backwards, yanking Zara over the top of the ladder and into the top of the bell tower.

"Hell of a nice view up here." Zara says once she's back upright, looking out to the top of the trees that seemed to stretch on endlessly into the distance, dissapearing into the murky blackness, too far and too dark to see everything all that clearly.

Zara was certainly right about that. Despite the darkness of the night, what they could see was lit by the silver glow from the moon, sat amongst the backdrop of the night sky that was complete with a scattering of stars; little pinpricks of lights stretched out among the skyline.

"I haven't been up here in quite some time now. So, yeah... Hell of a nice view."

After a few moments of doing nothing but staring out at the view, it suddenly dawns on Violet that she still had ahold of Zaras hand. The sudden realisation of it startles her like an electric shock, forcing her to quickly drop Zaras hand, heading towards the edge of the bell tower and taking a seat before Zara can say anything.

Zara takes a seat next to her, dangling her feet off the edge and glancing anxiously down

"Does this not freak you out?" Zara asks, looking up from the edge of the tower to Violet.

"Eh, not really" Violet answers, shrugging her shoulders.

"So you're fine with sitting on the edge of a crumbling tower, but not when you're climbing a ladder?"

"I've got more control up here. It would be hard for me to fall off here, much easier to misjudge a step and fall off the ladder."

"Good point. But if you don't mind, I'm going to scooch backwards a bit..." Zara tells her, pushing herself away from the edge and closer to the barely intact wall to her side.

"Do you mind if I ask..." Violet begins to ask, hesitating slightly when Zaras takes her eyes off the horizon to look at her.  
"What was the bad dream about?"

The mood shifts instantly, the small smile Zara had on her face melting away to be replaced with a stressed frown, averting her gaze back to the sky and absentmindedly counting the stars she could see.

"Dad"

"You dream about him often?" Violet asks softly.

"Usually? Not at all. Which is why I think this one got to me so much. Bad dreams never usually mess with my head so much."

"What, uh... What happened? In the dream?"

"It was more like... Replaying a memory, rather than a dream. Going through his death, over and over again. Except... I _knew_ what was going to happen every time. And every time, he still died. I could never stop it from happening."

"As much as you don't want to hear it...You can't focus on it. On what else could have been done. There's no way to change the past, you'll only be torturing yourself."

"I try not to think about him too much. It feels awful to do, knowing all he's done for me but at the same time it's just...it's so painful.  
The worst part about that damn dream is it made me realise just how much I miss him, even now. No matter how awful that dream was, a part of me enjoyed it."

"How could you have enjoyed it?"

"Because it was the only way I could see him again."

Violet knew all too well what she was talking about. So many nightmare she had awoken from, whether it be about Minnie, Tenn, Brody or Marlon.  
She always awoke in relief upon realising it wasn't real, and everytime it would be short lived, having to be forced to remember that they were still gone.

"I get what you mean." Violet tried to reassure Zara, who had seemed unsure about admitting what she had.  
"You don't want the nightmares, and at the same time, it's better than never dreaming of them again."

"I haven't really been able to stop thinking about him lately. Back at-- that guys funeral, Jack. I don't even know why, it's like it opened the floodgates. I've been able to keep them closed for so long and just ignore it all. What happened, the way I felt about it. I just chose... Not to?"

"Kind of sounds like denial."

"No, not denial." Zara asserts, shaking her head.  
"It happened. I know that. I know dad's gone. It's almost like... I skipped over the grieving part? Pretended I was past it, that I was healed. Seemed the easiest way, but now..."

"It's made it worse?"

"Much worse"

Seeing how down Zara looked, Violet patted her pocket to see if the project she had been working on was still where she had put it. She had been working on it with Willy for a while now, and they had recently finished it, giving it the finishing touches after shooting practice. It didn't take too long to make, as it was something that Willy now had experience making. Much too much experience than he ever should...

"I wasn't sure when to give you this, but now seems the best time." Violet announced, catching Zaras attention.  
"Seems we were both hiding something from eachother. Not only that, but Willy somehow managed to keep it a secret to himself that we were both planning on something for the other."

Violet pulls the item out of her pocket, holding it out for Zara to take. It was a simple wooden cross, one that matched all the others down in their graveyard. And just like the others, there was a name etched in gold across the cross; Connor. Though with the moon light up ahead, the golden letters had more of a silver glint to it.

"When you said about how your dad never got a funeral, it got me thinking. I know we can never give your dad the proper burial he deserves." Violet began to explain, watching nervously as Zara very gingerly placed her hand around the cross, bringing it closer in front of her.

"You... Made me this?"

"Yeah, along with Willy. I know it's not much, but... Thought your dad deserved a place to rest in the graveyard. And...That  _you_  deserved a place to pay your respects to him and, well... Maybe now to properly grieve?"

Zara nodded numbly in response this this, still staring down blankly at the cross in her hands.

"Sometimes I wonder... If its possible I'll see him again." Zara voiced her thoughts out loud, still looking at the cross she was holding.  
"Whether I'll never see him again, or I'd there's such thing as an afterlife. Heaven or hell, that kind of thing."

Zara lifted her gaze from the cross, locking eyes with Violet.

"Are you a religious person, Violet?"

Violet opens her mouth to answer, but finds no words when she realises she isn't entirely sure on what her answer is.

"I...Dont really know. My parents were, so were my grandparents. We all used to go to church together on Sunday."

"You went too? By your choice or your parents?"

"Both, I suppose. My parents wanted me to be a believer of the Lord, and it was all I knew. I had no reason to question it, so I believed."

"Believed. You don't anymore?"

"It's... Its complicated. Growing up alongside Church, the things we were taught... As I got older, I started to question it more. One thing that always stood out was the same teaching that came up more and more often, because of 'the way society's changing'. Over and over again, the same passage: 'If there is a man who lies with a male as those who lie with woman, both of them have commited a detestable act.'

It was something I just couldn't understand... Growing up, I was told that God loved all his children. Why would he stop loving them, condem them to eternity in hell for loving someone of the same sex?

Of course, that's when I started to realise about... Who I was. Who I liked. All my friends giggling over the cute boys in the class and I... Didn't get it. What the whole fuss about was with boys. When I started to realise why that was... I was _scared._ Scared that God wouldn't love me anymore, that I'd be burning in hell after I died.

I never told my parents about it. Tried to pretend it wasn't who I was. And then... Then grandpa died, and Grandma wasn't the same, and... After what happened, mom apparently decided she didn't want to deal with a odd kid, and honestly, I don't blame her. She sent me off here, and while I didn't know it at the time, it was the best thing for me.

I became more accepting of who I was, because everyone _e_ _lse_  was more accepting. I no longer attended church every Sunday, I had new friends, new school work, I... I had met Minnie. I didn't really think about my faith all that much anymore.

Then all this shit started. I watched people die around me, watched friends starve and struggle. I began to wonder if I even _wanted_  a God to exist. Would it be worth it, to have a God that was okay with what was happening? The thought that this God may have somehow sent the walkers himself, to watch us suffer in pain?

Still, at the end of it all, I don't know. I don't know if I believe."

Zara had returned to staring down at the cross the whole story, but Violet could tell she had been listening none the less. Her eyes appeared glazed over, but in that way that suggested she was focusing on listening more than she was looking.

"Sorry, that was a bit much. You okay?" Violet asks cautiously, worried she has stepped over a line.

"Yeah" Zara struggles to squeeze her voice out past her tightened throat.  
"Just, uh... Took me by surprise, is all"

"Well, figured I'd get you back for surprising me with, y'know, this." Violet jokes, waving a hand to the belltower they were sat on.

This at least gets Zara to chuckle, which in turn seems to get her to force her eyes away from the cross she was holding, carefully tucking it away inside her own pocket for safe keeping.

"I wanted to give you the space back. The place where you could escape to when you needed, to get away. You haven't been here for a while, so I knew I had to figure out a way to get you back up here."

As sweet as Zaras words were, something about it made Violet feel unsettled. Something that she couldn't quite put her finger on.

And then it hits her.

She couldnt ever remember telling Zara about the bell tower.

"When did I talk about the bell tower?" Violet asks, frowning in confusion.  
"I don't usually talk about it..."

The sudden panicked expression on Zaras face does nothing to comfort her. Zara does fairly well at covering it up, but Violet sees it none the less.

Zara is about to make up some sort of excuse as to how she knows about it, whether insisting that Violet had mentioned it at some point or someone else had talked about it, but then she's realises it's pointless. Judging by the look on Violets face, she knew for _certain_  there was no way she had talked about it.

Zara looked down to the floor guilty, needing to look at anything that wasn't Violet.

"I... I read about it, in your journal. You wrote about how much you missed being able to climb it after the accident on the boat"

A wave of sickness seems to dawn on her along with the realisation, confusing turning to sheer panic as she realises what Zaras was saying.

"How...How much of it did you read?" Violet asks in a whisper, struggling to stop the nerves from leaking into her voice.

Zara somehow manages to look ever guiltier, still refusing to look Violet in the eye despite her panicking.

"I'm sorry, Vi. I really am. I didn't realise you didn't want me to read those parts."

"Do you know?"

There's nothing but a horrific silence after Violet asks this, the seconds ticking on forever as she waits for an answer she's sure she knows the answer to. Finally, Zara gives a small, stiff nod.

The panic takes over as Violet stumbles to her feet, placing one hand in her forehead as she tries to get a hold of herself. She wasn't sure if this was something she was ever planning to tell Zara, but if she did, it _certainly_  wouldn't have been like this.

She sees Zara stand in a much calmer way out of the corner of her eye, watching in worry as Violet begins to break down.

"Don't suppose there's anyway you could forget what I wrote?" Violet asks in a last ditch attempt

"I don't think so, no." Zara replies honestly.

"Oh, shit. _Fuck."_ Violet mumbles in curses, turning away from Zara and returning her hand to her head again as the panic continues to rise.

She turns back to continue to speak to Zara, even though she's not entirely surely whats left _to_  say. As I turns out though, she doesn't have to, as any words on her lips are swallowed up by Zaras.

In the time it had taken her to turn, Zara had suddenly darted forward and sealed her lips in a kiss, gently yet firmly reaching out to hold Violets arms just above her elbows. Quite frankly, she's glad for the support, as the sheer surprise from the kiss may have resulted in her collapsing to the floor.

The kiss was soft and reassuring, tender yet firm. It managed to make Violet feel more relaxed, and at the same time kept her heart beating as fast as it could. Mostly from the constant thought of 'What is even happening right now' looping over and over in her head.

That same thought remained in her head even as Zara leant back from the kiss, questioning whether what just happened had happened despite the fact she had experienced it mere seconds ago.

"Sorry, I should have asked" Zara murmered in a low tone, still leaned in close to Violet  
"Except I was kinda worried you were about to pass out, so..."

The concern returns to Zaras face when Violet has no reaction to this, still staring blankly ahead as her thoughts occupied her mind.

"Oh God, did I break you?" Zara tries to joke, but it doesn't come out quite as comedic as she had hoped as the uncertainty in her continued to rise.  
"You're actually kind of freaking me out here, Vi."

"Sorry!" Violet finally blurted out, a bit too loud considering how late it was.  
"No, you didn't break me. You definitely took me by surprise. _Again."_

"I didn't plan to do this up here, by the way. That was never the whole... Point, to this."

"Okay. But... Why?"

"Why... What?"

"Why did you kiss me?"

Zara gives her the most dumbfounded look in response to this, as if it was the dumbest question she had ever heard.

"Because I like you?"

"Y-You... You do?"

Zara gives her the look once more.

"Well, yeah? I thought the kiss made that kinda obvious?"

"Oh. That... Wasn't the outcome I was expecting from reading my journal and finding out about... How I felt..."

"What did you expect?"

"Not entirely sure. Nothing good, really. Maybe that you'd be angry about it, or make you never want to speak to me again, something like that."

"What? No! I would never do any of that!" Zara spluttered, feeling the need to reassure Violet.

"Sorry, guess my mind always goes with worst case scenario" Violet huffs in explanation.  
"Probably why I broke for a bit there when you kissed me. Was kinda the opposite of what I was expecting"

"Wait, I thought you said you weren't broken?" Zara asks with a smile

"Might have lied a little. You broke my brain for a bit back there. I was still trying to process that you had read my deepest darkest secret"

Zaras face falls slightly at this, the happiness she had been feeling squashed down by an immense feeling of guilt.

"I really am sorry about that. I should have known you were going to continue writing in it and that there might be stuff you wouldn't want me or anyone else to read. But I just didn't really think  
I know that's not really an excuse, but... I'm sorry."

"Would you have ever kissed me if you didn't know that I liked you? If you had never read that part?"

"Honestly?" Zara begins, blowing air out of her mouth and glancing away from Violet to the horizon for a few moments before looking back at her.  
"Probably not. I had _no_  clue you liked me before I read it. Reading it sort of forced me to confront my own feelings and realise that _this-"_  
Zara points a finger to herself and then to Violet, switching who she was pointing at repeatedly to her point across.

"-This was something that I wanted. After I read it, I was actually waiting for you to make the first move. I didn't want to be the one to...force it? And then we came up here and everything just felt... Right. _Then_  you started having the panic attack and I didn't know what else to do."

Violet chuckles lightly at this. She wanted to admit that she was glad that Zaras answer to her panic attack was to kiss her out of it. At the end of the day, it got her to stop panicking. Even if it did kind of make her brain stop working for a few seconds afterwards...

"In any case, if you reading my journal meant that this would happen? I'm glad you disrespected my privacy and read it."

Zaras smiles softly at her, a small curl of the corner of her lips. Despite the dark, Violet can see the faint blush in Zaras face as she forces her gaze away, staring out to the night sky that would soon start to lighten, a line of muted orange just starting to appear in the horizon.

Violet is so focused on looking out to the view that she doesn't realise Zara is reaching her hand across until she feels it lightly graze against the top of her own. Zara ever so gingerly lifts her hand, flipping it over and grasping it in her own, the warmth of her hand immediately seeping into her own.

This time, Violet doesn't take her hand away.

"So... You liked Clem, huh?"

"You just had to ruin it."


	14. Chapter 14

\------------------------------------------------------------------------  
5 YEARS LATER  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------

The music room was fairly quiet for the moment, but Louis knew it wouldn't last. It had become a more and more popular hang out place for everyone as the years went by, especially as the nights became colder and people didn't feel like spending time starting a fire to keep warm.

Truth be told, he didn't like everyone coming into the music room at the start. It always seemed to be when he would be practicing piano, and like clockwork, it would be around two minutes before someone asked him to stop playing so they could talk in peace.

After a while though, he began to enjoy having the company in the room. Gradually, the others began to respect the fact that this was _his_  place to play and tried to avoid coming in when he was playing, otherwise they would keep the noise down or, even more miraculously, come in to actually _listen_  to him play. If anything was an indicator that he was getting better at playing, that was definitely it, as well as also helping encourage him to make sure the piano was in tune (Clementine would always punch him in the arm when he called her over to blow the strings)

He used to think he kept the room fairly clean, but apparently it was nowhere near it. Now with more people using the room, and using it more frequently, it was given a quick clean every now and then to make it more comfortable. The furniture in the room was no longer covered in a layer of dirt, books were returned to their proper place on the shelf and _not_  splayed randomly across the floor, and the curtains and couch were given a thorough beating to get out the dust that had collected over the years.

He wasn't the only one that used the room to practice playing. Like now for instance, as he stood in the doorway to the room, watching Zara pluck away at the guitar he had gifted her all those years ago. She had been practicing where she could, in the off times they had to themselves, which were far and few between.

Zara was sat on the old and weathered couch, her guitar in her lap as she practices a song he doesn't know, eyebrows furrowed in concentration as she plays. Violet is with her as well, sat on the floor, leaning against Zaras legs with a book in hand, flipping through the pages as she practices her reading.

It's very... Domestic?

"Ah, mother-" Zara exclaims after after messing up on part of the song.

"How long have you been playing guitar again?" Violet teased with a smirk on her face, not taking her eyes away from the book she was reading.

"You think you can do any better?" Zara retorted, leaning forward slightly to glare at Violet below her, resting an arm over the guitar.

"Y'know what? I probably could. And _I'm_  the one that's blind. What does that say about you?"

"Oh, don't you give me that. You're _half-blind_  at the most." Zara argued back.

"You can't argue about my type of blindness to distract from the fact that you suck at playing" Violet joked as she closed the book lightly on her fingers, craning her head back to grin up at Zara.

"Jeez, get a room you two" Louis teased with a smile from the doorway, snapping the two out of the grinning trance they were in.

"We _are_  in a room. You're the one that interrupted." Violet retaliated from the floor, none too happy about having her time with Zara spoiled.

Louis did his best not to startle at the feeling of a hand touching his cheek, brushing down to his chin and staying there for a moment.

"Think it might be time for a shave?" Clementines voice comes from his side, answering the question of who was touching him.

"But I'm trying something out..." Louis whined, giving Clementine a pout.  
"Besides, its _my_  face. Shouldn't I be able to decide if I shave or not?"

"You're not the one who has to deal with the stubble. I get razor burn on my face everytime I kiss you.

"But-"

"No more kisses until you shave" Clementine tells him in a scolding manner over her shoulder as she makes way into the room.

"I'm gonna call your bluff there, Clem. I don't think you can resist my kisses. You'll be kissing me, stubble or no stubble."

"Whatever you say" Clementine replies as she takes a seat next to Zara on the crouch, grabbing a nearby book that had been left out.

He was going to lose this bet...

"Wait, wait! I'll shave, I'll shave..."

As predicted, the music room began to fill with other people as the evening rolled by.

Willy and AJ were the first to enter, coming off their evening guard duty on the watch tower and lured in by the warmth of the music room.

Watching AJ and Willy grow had been one of the strangest things for Louis. Logically, he knows their growing had occured over time, but it seemed like they suddenly sprung upwards out of no nowhere.

AJ was no longer a little kid. Granted, he was still young, but had been steadily growing taller over the years. He had grown out of his babyish appearance, and already Louis could see his face thinning into shape as he loses the last of his baby fat. Thankfully, he had also recently lost his last baby tooth (Louis couldnt even begun to describe how nightmarish of an experience it was when _that_  whole fiasco begun...)

Willy, however, was the one who had changed the most as he grew. No longer a young boy, but now a young man. He had grown into his spindly limbs, and it was a trippy experience for them all when Willy's voice had deepened. It still had its scratchy quality, but was no longer as high pitched as it once was. What had freaked out Louis the most though was when Clementine mentioned that Willy was now around the age _he_  was when Clementine first came to the school.

There was one thing that hadn't changed, and that was the friendship between Willy and AJ. Despite their large age gap, which seemed significantly larger now at Willy's age, they were still fast friends. Whilst Willy had indeed grown up, it seemed that his maturity still had a bit more to go to catch up. And AJ, well, he still a kid. So, they still got on fairly well.

Rosie trotted into the room alongside AJ, making her way over to Violet and letting out a long huff as she plopped down beside her. She was visually beginning to age now; her muzzle and paws streaked with gray, her movements no longer as smooth as they were, joints creaking and cracking whenever she would stand up or sit down.

Aasim and Ruby were next to come in, side by side and hand in hand, as they usually were. Like Louis and Clementine, and Zara and Violet, their relationship was still going strong over the past five years. Sure, they had their rough patches just like any other couple, but at the end of the day, they were always able to reconcile, knowing that they were too important to one another to throw their relationship away over what were usually minor squabbles.

Last to enter was Omar and James. Omar was usually the last to enter the school anyway, being the one to tidy up after everyone else once dinner was finished (despite his constant arguments that someone else should be cleaning, considering the fact that _he_ is the one that does the cooking) and James, the good friend he was, would usually hang back and give him a hand.

Their friendship had been one that had blossomed over time. Both were naturally quiet people, preferring to stick to themselves. Being partnered together for shooting practice meant the two of them had been forced to interact, giving them a chance to talk more than they usually would.

In fact, once they got to know eachother a bit better, Omar had even let James help with cooking. James had sat and watched Omar cook a few nights, and it had peaked his curiosity in cooking. It was much to everyone's surprise when James asked if he could start helping with the cooking, and even more of a surprise when Omar actually _agreed_  to it.

They could tell it was still painful for Omar at the beginning, trying to fight off his OCD as he watched James fumble around at first, the perfectionist within him feeling the need to jump in and correct everything. Instead, he was patient and helped tutor James in the art of cooking, giving him tips as he cooked, showing by example, and sometimes just letting James take the lead. Having a hobby that they were both interested and passionate about helped their friendship to flourish even more, and without even listening, Louis could guarantee that they were already discussing tomorrow's meal as they walked through the door.

As he squashed himself into the space between Clementine and the end of the couch and took a quick glance around the room, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was off.

No, not off. Everything was as it usually was, but there just seemed to be something... Wrong about it. Something that he wanted to change.

Clementine glances curiously up at Louis when he arubptly stands from the couch, wondering what it is he was up to as looks around the room. Then, he brings his hand up to his mouth and places his fingers inside, letting out a loud, sharp whistle to get everyone's attention.

It works, to say the least. Everyone's conversations come to an arubpt halt, some even feeling the need to cover their ears from how loud the whistle was. There was no more effective way to get everyone to glare at him than this.

"Look around you!" Louis declares with a dramatic flair, spreading his arms out and gesturing to the room.  
"There's something wrong here. Can you tell what it is?"

"Yeah, theres an idiot standing in the middle of the room trying to defean us all" Violet complains, trying to rub away the ringing in her ears and getting a light playful kick from Zara for the insult to Louis.

"Close, but no" Louis retorts, barely glancing at Violet in acknowledgment.  
"The thing that's wrong is how distant we all are right now. Look how spread out we are!"

Louis was right. They had all split up into their own little seperate groups, finding their own space in the room and barely interacting with the others outside their group. AJ and Willy were huddled in one corner, James and Omar off in another, Aasim and Ruby sat nearby the piano and whilst Violet, Zara, Clementine and Louis were sat nearby, they had become perfectly content in essentially ignoring eachother and sticking to their own conversations.

"It _has_ been a while since we all talked..." Ruby agrees, looking over to Aasim who nods in agreement.

"Then guess its a good thing that _I_ have an idea to bring us _all_  together again." Louis tells them all with a bright grin

"Why do I get the feeling he's gonna say-"

"That's right! Game time, everyone!"

To Louis' surprise, this doesn't get the usual negative reaction he's become adjusted to. No groans, no whining, instead everyone is staring at him expectantly.

"Well? What game are we playing?" AJ asks after a few too many seconds of nothing but silence.

"Uh, to be honest, I wasnt expecting for you guys to be so okay with it. I usually think of a game while you're all shouting at me about how much you don't want to play."

"What are we going to do if you can't-"

"I got it!" Louis shouts triumphantly as an idea comes to mind, interrupting Violet once again.  
"I have to grab something first. Everyone else get in a circle!"

In the blink of an eye, Louis is racing out of the music room and out of sight, leaving everyone looking to eachother in uncertainty.

"Um... Should we get into a circle?" James asks timidly

Louis returns just as everyone else is settling down into a circle as he requested. Louis takes up the only empty spot next to Clementine, clutching an old and fragile looking glass bottle in his hand, leaving a handprint in the thin layer of dust that had settled in its surface.

"Spin the bottle? Really?" Violet asks

"Yup. But don't worry, this game doesn't have any smoochin'" Louis jokes, placing the bottle down in the middle.

"This... Is the bottle of stories..." Louis returns back to his dramatic tone, doing his best to keep everyone entertained.  
"We all take turns, going round clockwise. You spin the bottle, and then you get to ask whoever it lands on a question. Hopefully, at the end of it, we'll all have heard some good answers, and some good stories."

"Ooooo, this is gonna get deep" Zara says excitedly, fidgeting where she sat.

Violet is the first to reach for the bottle, grabbing its sides and giving it a spin. They all sit and watch as it spins in place, listening to the sound of ithe glass surface scratching against the hardwood floor. It slows down, wobbling as it loses momentum, untll eventually it comes to a stop, the neck of the bottle pointing straight at Louis.

"Ask away, Vi"

"You better answer this one, Louis. I've been dying to know for so long." Violet teases her questions, leaning back from the bottle.  
"There was this one time while Clem was still in crutches that you guys went for a walk. Clem hurt her good leg while out there, and refused to tell us what happened. So... What happened?"

"Ah..." Louis says with a nervous chuckle, looking over to Clementine.  
"Not sure if I can say. If I want to live, that is..."

"Aw, come on!"

"You've _got_  to tell us now!"

"That not fair, you can't leave us hanging like that!"

Louis gives Clementine his best pleading look, along with everyone else's demands to hear the story.

"Gotta give the people what they want, Clem"

"Ugh, fine" Clementine gives in with a sigh, waving a hand dismissively.  
"Embarrass away"

Louis turns back to the others with glee in his eyes, apparently as excited to recount the story as the others were to hear it.

"So, we were out in the woods for a walk, breaking in the crutches, that sort of thing. Everything was going perfectly normal, right?

I was recounting to Clem my amazing batting skills, still mourning the departure of my then missing dearest friend Chairles-"

"He was swinging his arms around, pretending he still had the chair leg" Clementine interrupts, stating the facts of what had happened.

 _"Anyway,_ while I'm showing my amazing batting skills, something whips right by my face! Turns out, I had caught a rope trap with the edge of my foot, which set it off, but didn't take me with it. Clem here then begins scolding me-"

"I was worried! You could have hurt yourself!" Clementine tries defending herself

"Yes, yes, as you said back then." Louis stops for a moment, an all too satisfied grin forming on his face.  
"Except, Clem here was so busy telling me off as we continued our walk that she didnt notice the _other_ trap nearby. Next thing I know, Clems hanging upside down by her leg"

"Wow, really Clem?" Violet teases Clementine, who's face had already begun to flush with shame.  
"Bet you chewed out Louis for distracting you"

"That's what I thought she would do, too" Louis remarks  
"Which is why it took me by surprise when Clem started laughing. Full on belly laugh, the kind where you can barely breathe. And I mean, that set me off too, so then _I_  couldn't stop laughing-"

"At this point we were just two idiots laughing in the woods" Clementine mumbles through her hand, which she was currently hiding her face in.

"Eventually, I realised I should try to be getting Clem down. I managed to stop laughing as much, and Clem was still giggling to herself and..." Louis trails off, a mild look of embarrassment and uncertainty showing on his face

"And?" Aasim asks, encouraging him to continue.

"Well, uh, I was just looking at her and..  
The words 'I love you' just kinda spilled out..."

The room falls oddly quiet at this, as if they had shared a moment that was too intimate.

"Was that the first time you told her?" Ruby asks.

"No" Clementine answers for Louis.  
"Back when I was bed ridden after the bite, was when he told me he had fallen in love with me. _This_ was the first time I heard him say the words 'I love you' and, well, it kind of caught me off guard, considering I was dangling in the air and all..."

"Worst part was that at that point I finally got the knot free and dropped Clem face first into the ground..." Louis admitted quietly, eliciting a snort from Zara at the image.

 _"That_  explains why you came back with leaves and twigs in your hair" Omar muses

"Alright, alright, I think you've embarrassed me enough. Can we spin the bottle again please?" Clementine pleads, no longer wanting to be the subject of embarrassment.

Louis is quick to make her feel slightly better by reaching over and wrapping an arm around her, giving her a quick squeeze in reassurance before leaning back to where he was.

"Okay Zara, guess its your go."

Zara leans forward, grabbing the bottle and giving it a spin. It slows down, the end of the bottle pointing towards James.

"Are there any topics I should steer clear of?" Zara asks, worried she might make James too uncomfortable.

"No, I don't think so." James answers.  
"Ask away"

"To be honest, I'm most curious about your last group. The Whisperers? What made you decide to leave"

Something on James face seemed to show that he was expecting a question like this. His right hand goes to a pocket on the inside of his jacket, hovering hesitantly over it before pulling out a small photo, placing it down gently on the floor. Everyone's eyes immediately go to the picture, the ones sat opposite having to crane their neck slightly to get a better look.

"When I joined the Whisperers, I was young. But I wasn't alone. We were living in the city, you see. Washington. It was one of the worst places to be when everything started. My dad, he... They got to him, fairly early. After that, it was just me and my boyfriend, Charlie"

James gently taps at the boy in the photo, the one that he has his arm slung around.

"Honestly, it was such a relief when we found the whisperers. Terrifying, but... Relieving. It felt like, this was it. This was how we could survive. No more hunger, no more running. We would learn how to survive, and we would be part of a group that had ours backs.

But, the Whisperers... Their methods were cruel. Unforgiving. Self important. I had been sucked into their way of living, of not caring of what happens to others, so long as the group stays alive.

I hadn't realised how far I had fallen until one day, we were planning to attack another group. One of our people had begun to question what we were doing, was seeing them as something more than just _our enemy._ That we were all in the same boat, humans trying to survive in a world of the dead.

I couldn't see it that way. I couldn't see it as anything other than a show of weakness. Weakness that would get me killed, get the others killed. I didn't even stop to think about it, didn't even flinch when I ran that knife across his throat. And neither did _anyone_ else. No arguments against it, no uproar. It was seen as a necessity. That I had done the right thing.

I don't know why, out of the countless horrific things I've done, _that_ was the one to suddenly flip a switch back in my head, to make me question what it was that I was doing. For the first time, I had doubts about the way I acted. About the man I _was._

And who could I talk to about it? If I mentioned something like this to the others, I would end up just like that boy, with a cut throat and dumped somewhere. To me, there was only one option. That surely, _surely,_  I could put my trust in Charlie. The hope that he would see it the way I had begun to saw it.

And so, I told him. I don't think I've ever seen such... Disdain from him. He told me that was I was talking about was treason. That I was reckless, to put my own wants before the groups needs. That I was turning weak...

It was when he begun threatening to drag me to our leaders that I knew I had to go... To escape them. It was a risk, but so was staying. I had no choice but to get out of there, even if it meant leaving the man I loved.

I thought it would be easier, after hearing the way he spoke to me, how he thought of me. Knowing that there was barely any resemblence to the person I had fallen in love with. And yet, I can't think of anything more painful than leaving him.

I don't know if Charlie's still with them. Or if he's even still alive. I'm almost certain that, if we were to meet again, he would kill me without a second thought. As would the others. And as much as I miss him, I'm still glad to have gotten away."

"I think we can think the same on that one." Louis tells James, eliciting a general somber murmer of agreement from everyone else.

Aasim is the next to reach for the bottle, straining slightly to reach it before spinning it in place, an idea already brimming in his mind as soon as it lands on Clementine.

"Oh, I think you're gonna love this one" Aasim teases Clementine.  
_"This_  is to get you back for one of our first game nights. You might remember that Violet asked the question of fu- uh, _flip,_ marry, kill-"

"Oh no..." Clementine murmered, eyes widening as the realisation of what Aasim was about to do dawned on her.

"So, to get you back for killing me in that game, I thought we'd do an updated version. So, Clem;  _flip,_ marry-"

"Can we stop with the flip already?" AJ interrupted with an irritated look.  
"I'm not a little kid anymore. You can just say-"

A sudden epiphany struck AJ, looking over to Clementine with a shocked and somewhat disgusted expression.

"Wait, you said you'd fuck _James?!"_

"I'm sorry, _what?"_ James splutters out in ask

"AJ!" Clementine scolds sharply, wishing she could hide the burning she could feel on her cheeks.

"Creepy mask and all" Louis whispers to James, wiggling his eyebrows at him.

Those at the original game all had a hand to their mouths, trying and failing to hold back the giggles that threatened to escape. Those that weren't could only sit and watch what was unfolding with a bewildered expression.

"Uh, anyway" Aasim tried to bring the attention back to himself.  
"Fuck, Marry or kill. You ready?"

"No, not in the slightest. Go for it anyway."

"Louis, Violet and Zara"

A chorus of "Oooooo's" go around the circle, a look of excitement appearing on everyone's faces, even the ones who had been named. The only one that wasn't in the least excited was Clementine, who quite frankly, looked like she wanted to strangle Aasim right then and there.

"First of all, stupid choice putting Louis in there. I'm going to marry him, obviously."

Aasim can only shrug in response to this, and Louis feels a odd twist on his gut, along with a strange sense of pride that Clementine chose that option so quickly.

"Okay, so... Violet and Zara. Which do you choose?" Aasim eggs Clementine on

"Well... Dammit..." Clementine says with a heavy sigh.  
"Zara, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I've known Violet longer, so I have to save her"

"Don't worry, I get it" Zara dismisses the attempt at an apology.

"I just want to make this clear" Louis says loudly, startling nearly everyone in the group.  
"To answer the question fully... Are you, Clementine, saying you would fu-, you know what, I can't say it, _Flip,_ our dear friend Violet here?"

Clementine didnt think her cheeks could get any redder, but once again Louis is here to prove her wrong.

"Louis, I swear to Go-"

"Nuh-uh! You can't threaten the man you chose to marry!" Louis teases, only serving to deepen the glare Clementine was sending his way

"Fine. Marry Louis, flip Violet, kill Zara." Clementine answers through gritted teeth.

"Yeah! Up top!" Louis shouts, trying to get a high five out of Violet which she adamantly refuses to do. (Zara is kind enough to indulge him, despite Violets instructions not to encourage him).

"Gotta say, loving this so far. Aasim, you might want to watch your back, Clems gonna come after you after that question." Louis warns Aasim, who chuckles at what he hopes is a joke, giving a worried glance towards Clementine.

Ruby is next to give the bottle a spin, and everyone looks fairly intrigued to find out what Ruby was going to ask when it lands on Louis.

"Bad night for you, huh Lou?" Violet teases with a grin

"Pft, there's nothing I have to hide." Louis replies nonchalantly with a dismissive hand wave.  
"Ask away, Ruby"

"Well, we know now when you told Clem you loved her..." Ruby begins her question, getting an eyebrow raise from Louis.  
"But when did you _realise_  that you loved her? What made you figure it out?"

Clementine gazes curiously over to Louis, interested to know the answer herself. To her surprise, the happy expression on Louis' face had disappeared, replaced with a look of uncertainty, and almost a tinge of...

Sadness?

"I uh, it's not a great memory" Louis mumbles in reply, raising a hand to rub at the back of his neck, staring down at the floor in front of him.

"Is it... When I think it is?" Violet asks quietly, ducking her head down a bit to try and meet Louis' gaze.

Louis doesn't say anything in reply, or even looks at her. Instead, nodding his head somberly in reply.

"There were some times, where I thought... Maybe I had fallen. But, to say I was in love... It sounded too much, y'know? I had never felt the way I felt before, but I just... Didn't know whether to put the name to the feeling."

"I don't think anyone realises when it happens. Not straight away, anyway." Aasim comments

"Closest I came to admitting it was after we got off that boat. After I was so certain that... That you, AJ and Tenn were gone" Louis admits, turning to look at Clementine as he speaks.

"When I saw you again, safe and sound, eager to get home, I thought 'Maybe this is it. This is what it's like'  
Then... Then AJ brings you back in a wheelbarrow, _covered_  in blood, and so close to...  
Ruby and Aasim were trying everything to keep you alive, here, with us. And then I knew. I was in love with you. I knew that you were the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.  
I only figured that out after I realised I may never get the chance..."

The room was so quiet, you would be able to hear a pin drop. All attention focused on Louis, taking in the raw emotion he was displaying.

Clementine slowly reached a hand out, placing her own over Louis's and holding tight.

"I wish I could have realised it at a better time. A happier time. But, I didn't. That's when I realised."

"You figured it out eventually. That's all that matters, right?" Clememtine asked him.

"Yeah, I did. And it is." Louis agreed, lips twitching into a smile.  
"That, and that you knew."

"I did. You made sure of that"

"You, uh... Mind spinning the bottle to take everyone's attention off of me?" Louis leaned closer to whisper into Clementines ear, getting a quiet laugh along with a nod of her head as an answer.

After Clementines spin, the bottle comes to a stop on Omar. Everyone's interest became piqued, wondering what question Clementine had for their chef.

"It's no secret you like cooking. What got you into it? Did you start once at that school, or before that?"

"Oh, I had been cooking long before I came here" Omar answered  
"Back when I was a kid, probably around 4 or 5, my dad met another woman. Apparently, he decided he would rather start a new family with her than stay with the one he had.  
Mom had to take care of me myself, which meant working long hours for barely any pay, all to keep a roof over ours heads, clothes on our back, and food in our stomachs."

"Your dad didn't help out at all? No money, nothing?" Zara asked.

"Nope. He completly disappeared on us, we had no idea where he went. We only found out why he left coz he had the decency to leave a letter explaining it."

"Wow. That... Sucks..." Clementine said softly.

"It did. Except, I didn't really understand it all at the time. It took me a while to realise that dad wasn't ever coming back.  
I was too young to really know what was going on. All I knew was that I barely got to see my mom anymore. There would only be a few hours in the evening I would get to see her, and most of the time she was at home at that time, it was spent cooking.  
So, I started to help out with cooking, since it was the only way I could spend any time with her."

"And you came to enjoy it?" Louis asked

"Eventually, yeah. I realised I was looking forward to it, not only because I got to spend time with mom, but because I actually _l_ _iked_  cooking.  
That's when it all started... Mom always pushed me to do my best, to be my best. I took that to heart a bit too much... I begun to focus too much on my mistakes, rather than what I had done well. Even if it was nearly completly good, it was never perfect. There was always _something_  to be improved upon, _something_  I had done wrong.

It started to spread out of control from there. Every thing I did, I had to do just right. It even started happening at school, and I even became obsessed over what _other_  people were doing. It was too much for people to handle, my friends, my teachers, and eventually, even my own mom.

Sending me here would be expensive, but she thought it would be worth it, if I got better. So when I got sent off here, I didn't complain. Just hoped they could make me better, so I could go back home."

"Did you ever come close to going home?" Clementine asked gently

"Sorta" Omar answered sadly  
"I wasn't getting _better,_ exactly. I still had the need for everything to be just perfect, but... I could control it. It wasn't a hinderance to me, or others. At least, not as bad as it once was. Still, they wanted to keep me here a bit longer, make sure I was completly ready to go out into normality again. Never got to go back."

"You must miss her" James states

"Yeah, I do. I hope she's still out there somewhere, and that she's doing okay. That she's found a way to be happy."

Since Louis is sat next to Clementine, he's the next one to spin the bottle. He adds a little dramatic flair to his spin, nearly smacking it across the room in the process. After a chorus of sighs around the room once he shoots out a hand to stop the bottle flying into the wall, he elects to spin it in a much calmer fashion than he would have wanted. The bottle comes to a stop, pointing down at Willy.

"Alright, Willy. I'm gonna give you a bit of a choice here. You want a happy, nonsensical question, or do you want a deep, personal, possibly saddening question?"

"Eh, well, we're all sharing, aren't we? might as well stick with the mood of the evening. Give me a sad one."

"You sure?" Louis checks, giving Willy the out if he needs it

"Ask away" Willy responds confidently.

"We've lost a lot of people, to get where we are today. If you had the option to bring back one, and _only_  one, who would you pick?"

"Oh, um..." Willy stutters out, the answer at his tongue almost instantly, but not wanting to say it straight away.  
"I think... God, theres so many but... I still miss Mitch so much, man. He was like my big brother, always there to protect me and... The one time he needed me to repay the favor, I couldn't do it..."

"Its a good answer" Aasim tells Willy, catching his attention.  
"And its not your fault, what happened to Mitch."

"No one but Lillys" Clementine adds softly.

"Exactly. There was nothing you could have done, Willy. It all happened way too fast." Aasim continued

"You did repay him the favor" AJ cuts in, getting Willy to look over at him in confusion.

"What'dya mean?"

"You're repaying him the favor by doing what he did. Mitch looked after this school, and that's what you're doing now. Now only that, but you took after him. You became more than just my friend, but like a big brother to me."

"I... Really?"

"Mitch would have been proud of you, hun" Ruby assures him, reaching over to rub comfortingly at his back. Willy doesn't shrug her touch off as he usually would, instead accepting the comfort that he didn't realise he needed.

James takes the break in conversation to grab the bottle resting in the middle of the group, giving it a spin, to which it settles on Zara.

"I, um... I understand if you dont want to answer this question, but..." James starts off unsure, rubbing at his arm in worry at the thought of the question he was about to ask.  
"It's just that... It something I've wanted to know, for a long time"

"Like Willy here said, we're all sharing tonight." Zara said, giving James a reassuring nod.  
"Ask what you need to"

"It's about when we first met. When most of us met you for the first time, really. You're not like it now, but back then... You became really freaked out around me. At first, I thought it was just the whole mask thing, but... You did it around Louis, too. And it was _bad._ Why is that? What made you so... Uncomfortable around us?"

Zara let out a soft sigh, while at the same time Clementine and Violet tensed up, casting eachother concerned looks before glancing to Zara for her reaction. Zara looks as if she was pondering something, thinking something over in her head, before she finally began talking.

"The difference now is trust. I trust you guys with my life, and you can be assured I don't mean that lightly. It's... Hard for me to start putting my trust in anyone else, after.. After everything that happened. After what I'm about to tell you."

"Hey, it's okay" Violet murmered into her ear, sensing her discomfort from where she was sitting.  
"This is big, You don't have to-"

"No, it's fine. _Im_  fine" Zara interrupted her, shooting her a grateful smile, warmed by her concern.  
"I was part of a group, before I met you guys. It was fairly near the beginning, not long after mom had passed....It was just me and my dad, and we were struggling. No food, no water, and barely any ways to protect ourselves. Frankly, it was a miracle we lasted as long as we did out there.  
When we found this group, we thought it would be our saving grace. It was, in a way. But I was young, and foolish. I couldn't see what was really happening. They were raiders, preying on communities that had let their guard down too much, strikingg them at their most vulnerable, wiping out those who resisted and stealing whatever they had for themselves."

"God, thats horrible...." Ruby commented somenly

"My dad, he... He never the kind of guy to do such a thing. To  _willingly_ do it, anyway."

"They forced him to? Willy asked

"As good as did, yeah. Twisted his arm. Told him that it was the only way they would let a kid who could barely do anything to help stay with them. At the end of the day, I was an extra mouth to feed  
I was still fairly young when it all started. Older than 14,15 maybe? But still... Young."

"What...What did they do?" Louis asked fearfully.

"They found a use for me" Zara whispers harshly in answer, angry tears brimming at her eyes.  
"Day after day, they would rape me. Taking their turns with me. They didn't seem to care that I was screaming and crying. if anything it just... Egged them on"

Zaras anger had been replaced with a heavier sort of tone of sadness, whereas there was nothing but a burning rage emitting from Violet. Even though she had heard the story before, it did nothing to dimisinish the flames of fury within her.

"After weeks of it, I realised there was nothing I could do to stop it. That it would be easier for myself if I just accepted what was happening, let them do... Whatever they wanted to do with me."

"You didnt tell your dad? Anyone?" Louis asked as gently as he could.

"No, But he found out anyway. I don't know how long it had been going on, a few years I think. The others were pretty good at memorising his schedules, making sure hw wouldn't come back. One day, he did. The raid was a bust, so they all came back earlier than expected and... He found out what they were doing.  
He got pissed, as you can expect. Knocked the guys ass out cold and dragged him to the leader of our group. Didn't help our case when the leader had been one of the guys doing this to me.  
When we were threatened with leaving the group, my dad dropped it. At least that's what I thought, till that same night he snuck into our leaders room and slit his neck open."

"Jesus..." Omar muttered

"Then we just.. Left. Gathered what we could and high tailed it out of there. It didn't last long. We managed a year on the road before they found us. Dad, he... They... They took care of him instantly. Cut his throat while we were sleeping, to 'return the favor'. Me though... "

Zara cuts herself off with a dry, humourless laugh, wiping the tears on her face away with the sleeve of her shirt.

"They weren't done with me quite yet. They wanted me to be in as much pain as possible, and believe me, they did that. I had never killed anyone before... Before I realised it was a me or them situation. They were careless, got a little too close with a free weapon. They thought I was so exhausted from their torture, so cut up from their weapons, too _beat up_ to do anything. I proved them wrong, obviously...  
I couldn't finish off the rest of them, though. Despite all that they had done, I couldn't bring myself to murser so many people. So, I ran. I ran, and I ran, and I ran, until I couldn't anymore. Til' the pain became too much. Til' _you_  found me."

Zara points at James as she says this, expecting him to make some sort of comment. Just like the rest of the group, he remains silent, waiting for Zara to continue.

"You guys know the rest. After all that happened to me, the way they defiled me, I just... Couldn't look at men the same way. Its not that I _wanted_  to, but it became sort of like a reflex, the need to stay away. I'm just glad I was able to find a way to shut it down a bit more, and that you guys have all been so kind to me. It really does help, so... Thank You"

"Thank you for telling us" James tells her sincerely

"It's getting kinda late" Clementine tells them, glancing out of the large window of the music room to the night sky outside.

"Yeah, I've got watch in a bit" Ruby says

"What'dya say? A couple more goes before we call it a day?" Louis aks Clementine

"Sure. Just a few, though. Don't wanna be up too late..."

Omar grabs the bottle at this, giving Violet a thoughtful look when it lands on her, trying to figure out the best question to ask.

"Violet, you've always been one of the bravest people here-"

"Damn straight" Violet affirms, accepting the high five Zara was offering her.

"-It always seemed like you weren't scared of anything. But _everyones_  scared of something, even if they Dont want to admit it. What are _you_  scared of, Violet?"

"I would have thought you would all be able to figure that out by now" Violet answers, looking to everyone's confused faces.  
"I know you guys are all 'glass half full' kind of people, but... We would all be lying to ourselves if we said I hadn't become weaker, now that I've partially lost my sight.  
Now, everytime me and Zara head outside those gates, im... I'm _terrified_  of losing her. That something will happen that I _literally_  can't see happening, and she gets hurt or killed, because of _me._ I could never forgive myself for that."

 _"_ That's _not_  gonna happen" Zara reassures her quietly, placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder.  
"Anything that happens to me, will be on _me._ Something happens to me, that is _n_ _ot_ on you, okay?"

"I'd say okay, but-"

"-But I can see through your bullshit" Zara finishes her sentence with a grin.  
"And don't you forget it"

"Alright, last one Willy" Clementine says as Willy reaches for the bottle, stopping him momentarily.  
"Make it count"

Willy nods as he spins the bottle, all of them watching as it slowly comes to a stop on Louis.

"Last one is for the game maker! " Zara declares with glee.

"Give me a good one, Willy" Louis challenges confidently.

"Hmm, let's see..." Willy ponders, tapping his chin absentmindedly as he things.  
"If you had the option to ask _anyone_  in here _one_  question, which they _had_  to answer truthfully, who would you ask?"

"Clementine" Louis answers before Willy has completly finished the question, a smile on his face when he sees the puzzled look Clementine gives him.

"Lou, you can ask me anything, you know that." Clementine tells him.

"Oh, I know. Theres a question I would ask though, that, even know I know you would be truthful, it would be nice to know for sure, that you meant the answer."

Louis' response does nothing but confuse Clementine even more, along with everyone else in the room.

"What did you want to ask Clem?" AJ asks inquizitivly

"Nuh-uh, that wasn't part of the original question" Louis replies with a teasing grin.  
"Guess you'll have to wait till next time to find out."

With that, some of the kids begin to stand up and make their way towards the exit to the room, either heading down to the dormitories to bed, or getting ready for a night shift up on the watch tower.

Willys question lies heavily on Louis' mind and, while everyone is distracted, he nonchalantly slips a hand into his coat pocket, feeling the cold metal of the rings brush against his fingers, their solidness against his hand only making what he was about to do all the more real.

"Hey, Clem?" Louis grabs her attention as she too begins to to stand.  
"Mind if we go for a midnight stroll?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

No matter how unsettling it was, Louis had to admit that the forest that surrounded the school had some charm to it, even if it was currently the dead of night. The air around them was chill, but not uncomfortably so. At least, not right now, anyway. The silver glow of the moon, along with the faint pinprick of light from the stars up above them gave all the light they needed to be guided through the leafy path they were walking upon.

Louis hadn't spoken much the time they had been walking, and while he knew that such silence from him would probably be unnerving to Clementine, he didn't entirely trust himself to speak right now. Not when it felt like his throat was jammed with nerves, and there was always the possibility that he would blurt out the question before he could help himself.

"Any clue how long this walk is going to take us?" Clementine asks him, picking up her pace a little to walk beside him instead of behind him, as he had been taking the lead.  
"Seems like it's going to be getting colder soon, and personally, I'd rather not freeze to death"

"Clem, you know I'd sacrifice my own warmth before I let that happen to you" Louis assured her with a gentle smile, nodding his head to the path ahead of him.  
"Besides, I'm shocked you haven't recognised where we've been walking to already"

Clementine furrows her eyebrows at this, taking a good look at the woods around her to try and figure out where it was Louis was taking to her. Now that he had mentioned it, the place _did_  seem familiar, but... Where it was just didn't seem to be coming to her right now.

"How's AJs piano lessons coming along?" Clementine asks Louis as they trek along the path. 

Louis looks at her, raising an eyebrow at the question

"Does he not talk to you about it?" 

"No" Clementine admits, sulking slightly  
"He refuses to tell me about how he's doing, I think it's embarrassing for him."

"Why would it be embarrassing?" 

"I think he's got it stuck in his head that he's no good at it. You should have seen his face when I asked if I could watch him play. You would think I had suggested we eat Rosie for dinner..." 

You've just got to let him build up his confidence a bit more." Louis tells her  
"I'm sure once he feels ready, he'll want nothing more than to show you. There's no ones opinion he cares more about than yours"

They walk in silence for a few more minutes, mostly because Clementine is so busy on trying to remember where they were. She doesn't get to figure it out, as they arrive at their destination before she can.

It had been a while, a few years at least, since Louis had last taken her here. Seeing the meadow once more brought back a flush of memories, the stronger iin her mind being the first time he had taken her their, of seeing the endless plane of green grass for the very first time.

"You wanted to take me to the meadow?" She questioned Louis as he gently took her hand, pulling her further into the grass and away from the forest.

"Yeah. We haven't been here for a while, so I thought, y'know.."

"Louis, it's... You know I love it, love this place, but... Why now? Why in the middle of the night? I was already anxious about the walkers lurking out here during the day."

"And I know you well enough to know you'd say that" Louis said with a grin, turning away from her slightly to gesture at the long grass surrounding them.  
"Which is why me, Zara and Rosie headed out here during our hunting trip to scout the place over. We made sure there weren't any walkers laying out in the grass, and disposed of any that were wandering nearby. We're as safe as anywhere else could be."

Clementine frowned at him, not because she was frustrated or upset with what he had done, but simply... Confused.

"You did all that, to bring me out here? In the night?"

"Well... Yeah." Louis answered, feeling some of his confidence start to waiver.  
"We've never been out here this time of day before, and I thought it was worth seeing."

Clementine did have to admit, he was right about that one. There was something surreal about being in their meadow in the darker hours. Through the uneasiness of being in the dark, she was quite entranced by the shimmering of the grass blades around them, reflecting the bright light from the moon above as they gently moves about in the breeze. The moon itself was clearly visible in the clear night sky, It was a full moon, and seemed impossibly close to them right now, smack-dab in the middle of the night sky at this hour, surrounded on both sides by countless of stars, the milky way clearly visible now there was no longer any light pollution to cover it.

"It's... Not just that..." Louis continues quietly, spoken softly and low, yet sounding loud in the silence they had been in.  
"I wanted to bring you out here because... There was something important I wanted to talk to you about."

"Okay..." Clementine drawled out the word, feeling a little worried by the seriousness in Louis' tone.

"You remember what I told you about my parents? The reason I was sent here?" Louis asked, waiting for Clementine to nod her head before he continued.  
"I mentioned about how my dad was trying to teach me a lesson. That I had to choose what I valued more in life."

"You can be happy, or you can be rich. Can't be both" Clementine parroted his father's words back to him, and the fact that she remembered brings a small smile to his face.

"Yeah, exactly. To be honest with you, I still don't really know what he wanted to teach me. Whether he thought it was more important that I followed in his shoes and stayed wealthy, or if I should sacrifice it all to be happy."

"It's... Not exactly the best lesson"

"No, it wasn't" Louis agrees with a huff.  
"Still, his words stay in my head. What I did to my parents, it was awful. But seeing what it did to my dad, being split apart from my mom, it gave me the answer to his question. That _nothing_  was more important than finding happiness. And I know it's not exactly like I can _choose_ anymore, since I'm pretty sure you cant be _rich_ when it's the end of the world. 

"Rich in food, maybe?" Clementine attempted to joke, but the seriousness in Louis's eyes made her joking tone falter.

"Either way, if it meant I wouldn't be happy, I wouldn't want it. Because it's _you_ that makes me happy, Clem. More than I thought I could ever possible be in this world, whether we were normal people living our lives as we were, or as we are now, a bunch of kids doing all they can to survive."

Louis slips his hand into his coat pocket, the weight of the rings in his hand feeling impossibly heavy right now. His grip tightens on them slightly, but he doesn't pull them out just yet.

"I know it won't be like it was, and I don't know what it means to you, or if you even care, but... It does mean a lot to me, and I hope that by doing this, it shows how much _you_  mean to me. So, Clem, w-"

"Oh, shit-" Clementine hisses in interruption, the negativity in her tone making Louis flinch back slightly, fingers immediately dropping the rings back into his pocket and withdrawing his hand out.

Had Clementine figured out what he was doing right before he had done it? If so, her reaction wasn't exactly the one he had been hoping for...

"Keep talking, like you were" Clementine instructed him, keeping her voice low and quiet.

"O-oh, uh..." Louis muttered, having absolutely _no_  clue what he should talk about. It wasn't exactly like he could continue his previous conversation _now,_ could he?

Clementine was looking at him as calmly as she usually did, but Louis could tell something was up. It was barely noticeable, but every now and then, her eyes would flicker over to something behind him.

"Seriously, what's wrong"? Louis asked, trying to keep his voice neutral despite the worry he was feeling.

"Don't look now, but I think someone's watching us"

Louis froze, all of his muscles immediately tightening, every instinct in him wanting to turn around and face whoever it was, but knowing he should listen to Clementines instructions.

 _"Shit"_  Clementine cursed in a whisper before taking off running, leaving a slightly bewildered Louis stood alone in the grass, blinking rapidly in confusion for a moment before realising that he should _probably_  be following her.

Louis chases after her, not too far behind her as they run to the tree line, racing and weaving through the countless trees that surrounded them, dodging down to avoid low hanging branches and hopping over various fallen logs and roots that threatened to trip them.

For a split second, he loses sight of Clementine, and he feels a familiar balloon of panic swell up inside his chest. Before he even has the chance to think about calling her name, he slams into the back of her, shooting out an arm to catch her before she could fall face first into the floor.

"What the _FUCK_  happened?" Louis questioned, looking around wildly for whatever they had been chasing.

"They ran out into here somewhere. I lost sight of them" Clementine answered, sounding annoyed with herself as she peered into the forest in the direction she had seen their stalker.

"And you're _sure_  you saw a person?"

"I know what I saw" Clementine snapped back, though the agitation in her voice is cleary a mask to hide her fear.  
"This is... _fuck..."_

"You sure it wasn't someone from the school?" Louis asks, having not got a very good look of who they were chasing.

"No" Clementine answers, shaking her head.  
"The thing is... This isn't the first time this has happened"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that this isn't the first time we've been watched. I thought I saw someone out in the forest near the school a few months ago, while I was on watch. I told myself it must have just been a walker, but if this means what I think it means, then..."

"Then whoever is watching us, has been watching us for a while."


	15. Chapter 15

It had taken a lot of convincing after they got back to the school that night for Clementine to get to bed for at least a few hours of rest. Of course, the second they got back, she tried making a bee line for the office, a plan for how they were going to tackle this issue already forming in her mind.

Louis was none too happy about this to say the least, knowing that this problem would keep her awake all night, and insomnia definitely won't help to stem the overwhelming panic she seemed to be digging herself into. Especially as he had noticed she hadn't been sleeping well for the past week, and seeing how the lack of sleep had been effecting her, even if she did her best to cover it.

So, after arguing his case, and a few insistments that they'd get right on it as soon as the sun was up, he managed to change Clementines path from the office upstairs to their room in the dorms, for what he hoped would be a good night's sleep.

It's not too much of a surprise for him that, when he wakes to see the sun barely past the horizon from the window of their room, Clementine is no longer laying next to him.

He heaves himself out of the bed with a sigh, wondering how on earth she's able to function on what he's sure is less than 2 hours of sleep over 7 days, as he stumbles out of the room in exhaustion.

He finds Clementine outside on one of the tables, but she's not alone. Zara is sat by her side, a comforting hand on her back while Clem sits leaning forward on the table, elbows on its surface and her head in her hands. He can hear them talking to one another in low tones, not loud enough to make out what they're saying from here. He steps down from the dorm doors, stretching his arms over his head as he heads towards the two.

"...If you're _that_  worried about it, you could always take a trip up earlier?"

"Trip up where?" Louis asks, only having caught the last of what Zara was saying.

"Hey, Louis" Zara greets him, casting him a worried look.  
"Clem told me about what happened last night. We were talking about what we should do about it, especially since we don't know for sure what that person was doing there"

"They were definitely watching us" Clementine asserted, pulling her head out of her hands to look at them.  
"They only ran away once they realised I noticed. They can't have anything good planned..."

"What did you see?" Zara asks Louis

"Not much" Louis answers with a shrug  
"They were behind me when Clem saw them, and they were already long gone into the forest by the time we took chase. I was too focused on looking where we were going to get a good look at the guy."

"Same for me" Clementine added bitterly  
"It was too dark to see much of anything. I think it might have been a guy, but... Not 100% certain."

"This has really got you spooked, huh?" Louis says, noticing Clementines pale perplextion.  
"Is some guys watching us that bad?"

"It's not like people ever stake you out for any good reasons" Clementine insists  
"They could be doing anything. Checking for our defences, seeing if theres anything worthwhile inside, getting a good look of all of us to see if we would be easy pickings..."

"Oh...."

"Yeah. Oh"

"And you've only seen them once before?" Zara questions

"Not entirely sure, but yeah. It's been a while, but I still remember how odd it seemed. I shouldn't have brushed it off..."

"Isn't there a possibility that its not the same person?"

"I mean, maybe? I don't know what's worse; if it's the same group that's been watching us for nearly a year, or if it's two different groups watching us. Then again, we don't even know _how_  long they could have been watching us."

"Suppose it depends on how good they are at hiding..." Louis wonders  
"What do you think we should do about it?"

"I think... I think we should take an earlier trip than planned to see Nathan."

"You think they might be watching them as well?"

"Possibly. At the very least we should warn them that there are people nearby spying on groups, right?"

"I suppose... Yeah, yeah we should. Its just... it's a long trip to go on foot and it _could_  be nothing." Louis says, trying to keep the panic to a minimum

"When is it ever 'nothing' with us?" Clementine argues back with a sarcastic tone

"All I'm saying is that it might have been some random person out on their own. You were on your own on the road for a while right? Both you _and_  Zara. I'm sure you were bound to have come across others in that time"

"I get what you're saying..." Zara says, and Louis can already hear the 'but' before she's even said it.  
"But generally... Whenever me and my dad thought there were others nearby, or thought we could hear people, we tended to start walking in the opposite direction. Being curious in this world is a deadly quirk."

"I know its a long walk, but we would be heading up to Nathan and his group sooner or later anyway. I'll feel a lot better once we get some more information about this from Nathan, and, if we're lucky, he'll be willing to help us sort this out. Maybe even help protect us, if it comes to it..."

Louis sighs, knowing there would be no way of getting out of this. From what he could hear, Clementines mind was set, and he'd be lying if he said the thought of people watching him for God knows how long didn't give him shivers.

"Suppose I should go get ready then"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I thought the trip up to Nathan's wasn't for a few more months?" Violet asked Zara inquizitively while Zara threw some supplies into her backpack, darting around their room for whatever items she needed to bring. 

"It was. There's been some... Problems"

"What kind of problems?"

Zara glanced up at Violet upon hearing the twinge of dread in her voice, seeing the all too familiar tense look of a person preparing for bad news.

"Clem isn't sure whether to tell everyone about it just yet, as she's not too sure herself and doesn't want to cause a panic"

"Please tell me you're going to go against that and tell me anyway?"

Zara huffed a laugh at this, zipping up her backpack and throwing it over her shoulder, securing the strap tightly.

"Good to see how well you know me." Zara says with a grin  
"Louis and Clem were out quite far in the woods last night, and Clems certain she saw someone watching them."

"Whoa... Do you think they know where we are? If they followed them from the school?"

"II have no idea. Neither does Clem or Louis. We're completly in the dark in this, and it's _really_ freaking Clem out. I imagine she's really worried about-"

"Another raid" Violet finishes grimly.  
"Not another one... We have guns nows but... We barely survived Lilly and her people, I don't know if we could survive another..."

"That's why we're going to Nathan and his people. They could be in the same boat as us, so its only common sense if we find a way to help eachother out."

"Clem must be really wound up about this if she's willing to drop everything and head all the way up there today."

"Yeah. She's..." Zara trails off, mouth partly open as if there was something else she wanted to add. Instead, she closes her mouth shut and shakes her lead lightly.

"How many are going?" Violet asks to fill the silence they found themselves in.

"Only three" Zara answers  
"Me, Clem and Louis"

"Guess that means I won't see you till tomorrow?" Violet asks sadly, only having heard of the long trip to the camp, never making the long journey up there herself

"Maybe the day after. Who knows how long this could take to settle out"

"I wish I could go with you" Violet murmers softly

Zara takes a step closer to Violet, reaching out for her hand and grasping it gently, lightly rubbing her thumb across Violets palm.

"I know" Zara replies softly, placing her other hand on the side of Violets face"

You will, someday. I'm sure of it. You'll get to a point where you're better at fighting off walkers with one eye than those of us blessed with two eyes"

"Anyone ever tell you that you suck at comforting people?" Violet asks with a barely there sly grin.

"Only you" Zara answers  
"Yet, it still seems to work"

Violet leans forward to plant a soft kiss on Zara lips for a brief second, leaning her head against Zaras and closing her eyes for a moment.

"Come back safe, okay?" Violet asks of her, opening her eyes to meet Zaras  
"You've still got some private lessons you owe me"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There's a gun to Louis's head, and you'd think that would worry him, but he's all too used to this song and dance by now.

"You guys really know how to make us feel welcome" Louis joked to Alex, eyes flittering from the end of the gun barrel pointed at him to the man holding the gun.

Alex blinks slowly and sluggishly, and for a second, Louis could swear there was almost a look of uncertainty in Alex's eyes as he looked at him, as if he couldn't quite recall who it was speaking to him. Its only there for a second, before its replaced by a much more comforting look of recognition, quickly followed by the end of the guns barrel dropping out of his sight as Alex lowers the gun.

"Oh, hey, uh, Louis" Alex says in greeting, looking over to Clementine and Zara, who were stood next to him.

"Hello, Clementine and, uh... " Alex scrunched his face in frustration, struggling to remember Zaras name who, admittedly, hadn't talked to Alex all that much.

"Zara" He thankfully remembers, nodding along with his realisation.

This wasn't new. Well, nearly forgetting their names was, but not Alex's change in behavior. While he had become slightly more reciprocal to them over the years (even though it felt like it resetted every time they visited, and usually took Alex some time to warm up to them again), it was the odd spacey type behavior that they had started to get used to.

After what happened with Jack, Alex just... Wasn't the same. He was still a soldier at heart, dutifully completing whatever orders and tasks he's been giving, but it was clear that something was missing. While they had slowly started to chip away at Alex's exterior over the years, they had come to accept they would never get to know the _real_ Alex was. Whoever that person was died along with his brother. His only family left.

"What are you guys doing here? Alex asks, waving down the guards that had rushed out from the gate, guns up and ready for a possible intrusion. They followed the instructions of their superior, lowering their weapons and standing by, ready for their next orders.

"There's been a, uh... Slight issue" Louis offers in explanation

"We could be in danger. And there's a chance you all are, too" Clementine adds

"What kind of danger?"

"We don't know yet. That's why we're here. We need to speak with Nathan, see if its only us having these problems."

Alex looks to them for a moment before calling over another guard, murmuring instructions into his ear. The guard nods once Alex finishes speaking, slinging his gun around his back and marching off towards the towering gates which screech as they are pulled open, then creating a solid sounding clang when they close again.

They're only left waiting awkwardly outside the gates with Alex, wondering what exactly was going on before they hear the screeching of the gates once more, seeing Nora walk out with a young Benjamin in tow, mostly hiding behind his caretakers legs.

"From what I've heard, this isnt just a social call?" Nora asks once she's closer to them

"I wish it was" Clementine replies glumly

"Hey there, bud" Louis says to Benjamin with a smile, crouching down to Benjamin's height.

The young boy looks considerably nervous, Louis's greeting only making him hide behind Noras frame even more, looking up at her in uncertainty.

"It's okay Ben" Nora reassures him, nudging him out from behind her slightly  
"You can talk to them"

"Hello..." Is all they get from Benjamin, eyes darting between Louis and Clementine, as if sizing them up, still unsure of the people standing in front of him.

"Should probably come around more often" Louis says as he stands back up to his normal height  
"Poor kid doesn't remember the amazing bond we have. I've got to do more to ingrain myself into his memories..."

"Trust me Lou, you're the kind of person thats hard to forget" Clementine tells him with a small grin

"I have no idea if you meant that as a compliment or an insult, but I'm going to take it as a compliment"

"You said you needed to speak with Nathan?" Nora interrupts them, getting to the point they were here for

"Yeah, we do." Clementine answers

"Is it something urgent?" Nora asks, brow furrowing in worry

"That's the problem. We don't know for sure." Louis tries to explain

"Is Nathan here?" Clementine asks

"He is, he's up in his office right now. Come on, we'll take you up there."

The base looked as it usually did, barely changed since the first time they had seen it. It's still as busy as ever, soldiers flittering in and out of buildings, heading to or doing whatever task that had been assigned. Watchful eyes looked down on them from various elevated positions around the base, keeping an eye both on what was happening outside the bases fences as well as inside.

The near deafening groans of the walkers milling about in the sewer pipe was as loud as Louis remembered, trying to avoid the urge to wince from the volume of the dead as they passed by the construction area.

Two stationed guards standing in front of the building of Nathan's office push open the doors they're guarding for them, giving a nod to Nora as they enter the building, letting the doors gently swing closed behind them.

"I've got to take Ben back home" Nora tells them, grabbing hold of Benjamin's hand once in front of the second set of double doors.  
"Nathan's been told you're here, he's expecting you."

"Thanks, Nora." Clementine told her, looking down at the still nervous looking Benjaming and giving him as warm of a smile as she can muster.

"Bye, Ben"

Benjaming glances up at Nora again, and when she nods at him, he gives them a small, timid wave goodbye before Nora leads them down the corridor and out of the building.

Clementine knocks on the door out of politeness before pushing the doors open, revealing Nathan leaning slightly over his desk, biting absentmindedly at the nail on his thumb as looks over the file in front of him. Realising they were in the room, he averts his gaze from the file to the three of them, giving them a smile as he picks up the file and tucks it away in a drawer before addressing them. 

"Id say I'm happy to see you but, in my experience, surprise visits are never for anything good."

"How could you tell?

"I'd love to say years of experience and an amazing natural sense, but my guards told _me_ that _you_ told them you have some bad news for me" Nathan explains, gesturing at the three chairs sat the opposite side of his desk for them to sit down in.

"Well... It might _not_ be" Louis says as he takes the offered seat  
"But, y'know, it also could be..."

"Last night, Louis and I were pretty far outside the perimeter of our home" Clementine begun explaining  
"I saw someone out in the forest, watching us"

Nathan's eyebrows rose up at this, leaning back on his chair and letting out a huff of air.

"Is that all they were doing? They didn't make any threatening moves, had any weapons on them?"

"No, and no. Once they realised I had seen them they just... Took off"

"You recognise them at all?"

"No. It was too dark and they were too far to get a good look. We chased after them, but lost them in the woods"

"And you think they were... Scouting you out? Just you two or the whole group?"

"Not entirely sure." Clementine answered  
"Thing is, I might have seen someone else watching us before. It was months ago, and for some reason I brushed it off as nothing, but now..."

"Now we're kind of worried they're connected" Zara continues for Clementine  
"We wanted to come here to warn you, in case it might be happening to you?"

"No need to warn us" Nathan replied gravely, rubbing a hand across his forehead as he spoke.  
"At first, I thought it was just paranoia from my men. I can't blame them, it's night, your brain starts seeing things, but... More and more reports from soldiers whose judgement I know I can trust, and now... Now its happening to you guys too"

"You're being watched as well?" Zara asked fearfully

"What you said pretty much confirms it" Nathan says, drumming his fingers against the table as he thinks  
"You said you first noticed something a while back? How far back?"

"Months ago." Clementine answered, thinking back to the first encounter, her answer getting a thoughtful nod from Nathan

"It was months and months back I started getting sightings of unknown people from my men. A year ago, maybe."

"You think it all started around the same time?" Louis asks

"Seems that way"

"What should we do about it?" Clementine asks

"What is there to do?" Nathan asks in response  
"They haven't exactly _done_  anything but... Watch. I could order my men to shoot on sight, but that's a risky game. It doesn't take much to get people wound up, and I can see this ending in my men accidentally shooting our own people, maybe even one of you guys.  
Even if it isn't, I don't want to go around shooting people who could be harmless, and I certainly don't want to go and start a war."

"But what if doing nothing is what _starts_  a war?" Clementine insists, the thought of sitting back and doing nothing not sitting well with her.  
"They're watching us for a reason. They might know we have a trade deal going on, and so they might be planning to steal our trade supplies"

"Or seeing if we're weak enough to take on" Zara adds

"I get what you're saying, really I do, but..." Nathan cut himself off with a sigh, throwing his hands up in the air in exasperation.  
"The only thing I can think of doing is turning the tables on them. I'll send some more patrols out, and I suggest you do the same. See if we can catch them in the act. Its up to you if you want to watch them and see what they're doing, or if you want to try and capture them and find out what's going on. Whatever you do, you do it at your own risk. We have no idea how powerful these people might be."

"I really hope I'm wrong, and this turns out to be nothing" Clementine says wishfully, standing from her chair

"From your tone, I'm guessing you're not often wrong?" Nathan asks in an attempt of a joke.

"Hey, uh..." Louis begun awkwardly, having not yet stood from his chair, whereas Clementine and Zara were stood and looking ready to go elsewhere  
"I kind of need to speak with Nathan for a minute in private"

"Oh" Clementine responded in surprise, glancing over to Nathan who looked equally as suprised at the request.  
"I was going to go ask Doctor Williams something anyway. I assume he's someone around here...?"

"That man never leaves the base unless I drag him out with me" Nathan answers with a chuckle  
"You'll probably find him somewhere in the base hospital, if not ask around, someone will know where he is"

"I'll come meet you back here?" Clementine asks Louis, who nods in answer.

Louis waits until Clementine and Zara leave the room and he hears the external double doors shut closed before turning back to Nathan, who is leaned over his desk, head resting on his joined hands with a curious look.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"It's about something that happened last night. More... What _didn't_  happen"

This does nothing but confuse Nathan even more

"Alright, what _didn't_  happen?"

"I've been thinking about it for a while, and I finally decided I was going to do it. I was going to propose to Clementine last night. Until the whole 'random guy watching us in the woods in the middle of the night' kind of ruined the moment"

"You... Wait, really?" Nathan asks in shock, a big grin forming on his face as he leans back in his chair  
"That's fantastic! That's a big step to take"

Nathan jumps up from his desk before Louis can reply, heading over to the cabinet behind his desk.

"I think congratulatory drinks are in order" Nathan throws over his shoulder, the sounds of clinking glass emitting from where he was stood.  
"I think you're old enough to drink now, as well, don't you think?" 

"Uh, uh yeah, I am, but... Why are we celebrating exactly? I didn't actually  _get_ to proposing."

"True." Nathan replied, pointing to him with his forefinger, the rest of his hand occupied with holding the glass of whisky.  
"But you were _committed_. You were going to take one of the biggest steps there is in life, and that's a big deal. That's something worth celebrating."

Louis took the glass that was offered to him, staring inquizitivly down at the brown liquid that sloshed around in the tumbler glass he was holding. He shrugs, bringing the glass to his mouth and taking a swig.

The harsh burn takes him by surprise, barely having time to register the flavor that briefly passes by his tongue as the liqour burns what feels like a path of fire as it slides down his throat.

"It's good" He barely gets out through a spluttering cough, his reaction resulting in a snort of laughter from Nathan as he takes a sip of his own drink.

"Probably shouldn't try to gulp down your first drink" Nathan advises him, placing his glass down in front of him.  
"Also, this is a sipping drink. Small sips at a time, let's you savor the flavor and not, well nearly choke to death, from what it looked like"

"Took me by surprise" Louis explained, timidly taking another sip, albeit this one much smaller, of the whiskey.

"Eh, its not for everyone" Nathan responds, picking up his drink and taking another sip himself.

"So..." Nathan starts once he's swallowed the drink  
"You were going to propose, but you didn't. Why exactly do you need to talk to me about it?"

"Its hard to explain....I'm... I'm starting to wonder if maybe it's not a good idea?"

"What? Why wouldn't it be?"

"I know it's going to sound stupid, but... What if I wasn't _meant_  to propose? What if the interruption was like, I don't know, giving me a second chance to think it over?"

"You can look at it that way if you want to" Nathan said, shifting to get more comfortable in his seat as he spoke.  
"But do you?"

"I don't know..."

"Look, I get it. It's a difficult decision to make. Sometimes, the best way to tackle a difficult decision is to break it down into something simpler.  
Logically, what's going to change, if you were to get married?"

"Uh... Not much?" Louis answered, tone laced with confusion  
"I suppose we'll be wearing matching bands?"

"But not much will change between you? With the way you live your life?"

"I guess not"

"Would you be happy to spend the rest of your life with Clementine, with or without the title of 'husband and wife?'"

"Of course"

'Then whats got you worried about marrying her? "

"It's... its nothing about marring _her_ that has me worried." Louis said, feeling slightly frustrated.  
"It's more that I'm worried _she_  won't want to. I'm not _just_ worried she'll say no and it fucks our relationship up, but that she might say yes and then... Regret it later"

"Why would you think that?"

"I can't help it...She makes me happier than anything, you know? And... I _hope_  I make her happy, too. But if I don't, if there's something or someone else that makes her happy... I... I just want her to be happy"

"Louis, listen to me" Nathan commanded, leaning closer to get his point across  
"You're a good man, and you'd be a good husband to Clementine. And she _knows_  it. You might find it hard to truly believe it, but take it from an outsider, that girl _loves_ you, more than anything. It's plain as day. If I'm wrong, you're more than welcome to come back and shoot me with my own gun. That's how confident I am"

Louis chuckled weakly

"Thanks, Nathan"

"No problem, son. Anytime"

The doors opening to their left makes them both jump slightly, heads snapping over to the door to see a guard entering the room, pausing briefly upon seeing the eyes that were on him.

"Apologies, sir" The solider begins, continuing to walk over to Nathan and bending over to whisper something into his ear. Nathan nods as the man talks, sighing lightly once the man has finished.

"Theres a bit of a problem I have to attend to" Nathan tells Louis as he stands from the desk, opening one of the drawers and withdrawing his pistol, tucking it away in a holster attached to his hip.  
"Hopefully, I'll be back before Clementine and Zara are. If not, don't feel the need to wait for me. I know you have a long trek home. If it comes to it, I'm more than happy to have one of my men give you a lift back. If you do leave before I'm back then, well, Goodbye for now"

"See ya, Nathan" Louis says, waving goodbye with glass of whisky still in hand  
"And thanks for the drink, and the talk"

Nathan and the solider leave, leaving Louis alone in the now much too quiet office. It doesnt take long before boredom begins to kick in, tapping mindlessly at the glass in his hand as he looks around the room.

The slightly open file cabinet in the corner of the room sticks out like a sore thumb to him. Nathan's office was usually so organised, so seeing the open drawer immedietly grabs his attention.

The sight of a folder just barely peeking out from within the cabinet arouses his curiosity, glancing to the door to his left to check no one was looking on on him before he stands from the chair and heads over to the cabinet.

He pulls the cabinet drawer open with his free hand, revealing the countless folders neatly files away within, their name tags lined in an orderly fashion along the top of each folder.

They were all names; Monem, Boutar Park, Smithden, Prescott, Leans Springs, Hamorfield, Richmond Lockwood.

He nearly does a double take when he sees an all too familiar name glaring out at him

Delta

It wasn't the only name he recognised in them. He had nearly glanced past it, but there was also a folder for McCarroll Ranch.

His whole body freezes up when he comes to one of the folders in the cabinets. A folder that bared the name;

Ericsons

Once again, he looks to the closed door of the room, listening intently for any footsteps or sounds of conversation from beyond the door. After a few seconds of hearing nothing but silence, he rips the folder out with his free hand, flipping it open.

The folder was thick with pages, and in the first page, Clementines face is looking back at him. Tucked neatly in the corner of the page is a printed photo of Clementine. But, it's not how secret photos look when he saw them in spy films as a kid. No, the pictures aren't grainy or blurry, they're not out of focus and taken from a distance. It's crystal clear quality, obviously taken quite close to Clementine.

Swallowing down the fear in his throat, he continues to read the rest of the page.

 

_**Name** : Clementine (Last Name Unknown)_

_**Known Aliases** : Clem, Clemmy, Darling **(See Ref File; Louis)**_

_**Age** : Estimated 22-23 Years_

_**Occupation Within Group:** Leader_

_**Known Relationships:** Louis_

**_Details:_ **   
_Clementine has proven herself to be a natural leader within the group. She always takes initiative with every decision made, and its clear that every decision made is in the best interest of the rest of the group._  
_Is kind hearted, but prepared to do whatever needs to be done to protect others. Close to everyone within the group, and is very protective over those closest to her (See Ref Files; Louis and Alvin Junior)_  
_Hasn't been at Ericsons for as long as the others, joined at age 16-17 years. Spent time in other groups, along with spending time both on her own, and with a young child **(See Ref File; Alvin Junior)**_  
_Skills in combat are invaluable. Efficient at dispatching walkers, and is prepared to take human life for her own and others safety. Has shown countless displays of skill with melee weapons, particularly with knifes and other sharp weapons, but has also used blunt weapons to good effect._  
_Has experience with guns, though uses them irregularly and as little as possible. Chance of previous trauma, need more information._

**_Weaknesses:_ **   
_Desire to keep others safe sometimes result in putting her own safety at risk._  
_Having people she cares about nearby can sometimes be a hindrance to her combat skills, her worry over others occasionally putting herself and others at risk._

_**NOTE:** Due to a bite to the lower leg, Clementines left leg has been amptuted under the knee. However, she has adapted tremendously to the missing limb with the aid of a prosthetic, and, after years of practice, shows barely any signs of the leg being missing. While it does have some overall effect, they are too minimal to have much of an impact._

**_Overall Status:_ **

**_Salvageable_ **

 

None of this seems to make any sense. All this information on Clementine, information that he's certain Nathan shouldn't entirely know about. The last part has him the most confused, pondering over what the hell ' _Salvagable_ " could mean.

He flips through the pages, every page featuring a photo of someone from Ericsons, every flip of a page making him feel more and more sick. He stops at Violets page, even know he already knows he's not going to like what he's going to read.

 

_**Name:** Violet (Last Name Unknown)_

_**Known Aliases:** Vi_

_**Age:** Estimated 23-24 Years_

_**Occupation Within Group:** Primarily Fisher and Gatherer, Gardener, And Similar Chores_

_**Known Relationships:** None_

**_Details:_ **   
_Violet has been at the boarding school since before the beginning of the apocalypse._  
_Like most of the other children in the school, she has shown impeccable survival skills, having survived years by themselves with little to no adult assistance._  
_Can occasionally have trouble socialising with others. Traumatic incident occurred in childhood **(See Weaknesses section for more)**. Could be used as an advantage, but could also create problems in the future._

**_Weaknesses:_ **   
**_NOTE: MAJOR INCIDENT OCCURED:_ **  
_Due to a clash with hostile group **(See Ref Folder: Delta)** , an incident occured with an explosion, resulting in permanent vision loss. One eye has lost sight completly, the other only has minimal sight, greatly affecting overall vision._

_Similar to other children at Ericsons, a traumatic incident occurred in Violets childhood which has had an impact on her overall behavior._  
_Violet witnessed a successful suicide attempt of her Grandmother, and was sent to the school for help when it was found she did not respond to the death of her Grandmother for hours, only responding once her mother found her._  
_Incident shows that Violet can have difficulties dealing with stressful and emotional situations, which has proven to be true in previous situations. **(See Ref Files; Minerva and Marlon)**_

_Before Major Incident, Violet was capable of using mostly melee weapons, mainly sharp weapons (Cleaver was known favorite)_  
_Due to her injuries and loss of sight, her combat skills have weakened dramatically. While mostly still able to fight, she has numerous times gotten herself into dangerous situations in which she required the aid of another. Her anxiety over her own skills due to her lack of sight has made her extra wary, resulting in a negative impact to her abilities._  
_She has been attempting to adapt with her new disabilities, but has been struggling. Slight improvement over the past 6 years of having said disability, both with use of melee weapons and firing a weapon, but both remain hindered._

**_Overall Status:_ **

**_Unsalvagable_ **

He wants to stop reading, but he can't stop himself. Reading every tid bit of information that Nathan somehow has on them all, information that, as far as Louis is aware, Nathan has not used against them so far.

He continues to look through the folder, trying to find his own page. To his surprise, his photo is the only one that's not clear, instead appearing quite blurry and out of focus. It's only once he tries reading the information on the page that he sees the writing too is blurry and ineligible. He blinks rapidly, trying to clear his vision to get a better look at the page.

The sound of glass shattering startles him slightly, looking down to see the glass in his hand had slipped out of his unresponsive hand, crashing into the plastic floor and spilling out the amber liquid, which slowly creeped towards his feet.

He tries to take a step back, but it's as if his body isn't responding to his own brains instructions. His foot moves, but slowly and sluggishly, feeling like time was moving slower than it was.

The second he takes the step back, his leg gives out from under him, seemingly unable to take his weight no longer. He collapses down onto his side, an odd sense of exhaustion takes over the panic he had been feeling. The folder had dropped to the floor with him, sending its pages sprawling across the floor.

Louis manages to focus on Clementines photo that laid across from him as the blackness that had been creeping in the sides of his vision finally begun to close in. There are sounds coming from somewhere to his side, but everything is muffled and distorted.

Everything fades away into blackness as he falls into unconsciousness, the last thing he hears being a familiar male voice giving out instructions.

"Take him downstairs. You'll find the other there."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The concrete against his cheek is so cold it almost feels damp. His body resists any attempts at movement, muscles still not fully awake yet as he slowly comes back to his senses. Whatever smallnmovements he can make, his body seems to scream out in disagreement, sore from lying on the hard ground for God knows how long.

It's not until he tries to push himself up into a sitting position that he realises his arms are restricted from moving, the rough rope tied around his wrists taking away his full movement. The tightness he also feels around his ankles must also mean that his feet have been bound too.

" _Louis_ "

The last dregs of drowsiness are snapped away at the sound of Clementines voice. Not just hearing her voice, but hearing the fear in her tone as she called his name.

Once his vision comes back into focus, he sees Clementine sat in the corner of the room they were in, she too with ropes secured around her arms and legs.

"Thank God, for a second there I thought you wouldn't wake up" Clementine said, pulling uselessly at the ropes tied around her wrists.  
"Are you okay?

"Yeah... I think so. Where are we?"

The room they're in consists of three solid concrete walls, barely lit only by the faint light coming from the hallway opposite, visible only through the bars lining the fourth wall.

Bars... Was this?

"Are... Are we in a jail cell?""

"I don't know what else it could be"

Clementine looks considerably more alert than he knows he must look, judging by the left over ache in his body and pounding headache that had slowly begun creeping up on him now he was awake.

"How did they get you down here?" He asked Clementine

"I was grabbed by a bunch of soldiers. I had been talking to Doctor Williams. He left the room for a bit saying there had been a problem, then shortly after he returned, soldiers flooded the room and dragged me down here."

"Jesus... You okay?"

"I'm fine. they were oddly careful with me, barely laid a hand on me really. Other than, you know, dragging me all the way out here."

"Was Zara with you? Is she okay?"

Clementine shakes her head

"I didn't see. She was with me but then there was too many people and... All I could see was a bunch of uniforms. I heard her shouting something but... I don't know"

"I think...I might have been drugged"

" _What_!?"

"Either that or I _really_  can't handle my liqour."

"Nathan drugged you? Why the hell would he do that?"

"I think it might be something to do with what I found in Nathan's office"

"I found something too" Clementine whispers fearfully, glancing at the bars that prevented their escape.  
"More like _saw_  something, while they were leading me through here. This room is one of many"

"How the hell did we not see this place?"

"Because it was hidden. This whole place is underground, and it is _huge_. What I saw, I.... Louis, there were _children_."

"Children? Down here?"

"There were so many. All holed up in different cells, sat in the dark. Some of them were older, maybe closer to their twenties but... God, some of them were AJ's age. Some were even younger... Maybe 4 or 5"

"What the fuck is going on..."

"There's something... Not right about them. You'd expect them to be upset about being trapped down here, maybe angry, but they weren't. They were all so... _blank_. Their faces were expressionless, they just sat and watched as I was dragged past them."

"What the hell does Nathan want with kids?"

"And what does he want with us..." Clementine mumbled bitterly

Louis shuffled his way over to Clementine, leaning back aginast the wall with a heavy, exerted sigh once he reaches her.

"I think I figured out the mystery of who's been watching us" Louis tells Clementine, turning his head to speak to her.

"Funnily enough, I think I might have figured that out too" Clementine replies sarcastically, still squirming aginast the ropes that held her.

"We're not the only one's he's been keeping tabs on" Louis continues  
"There were a bunch of folders with information on different groups. Most of them I didn't recognise, but we were there. And so were the Delta. And..."

"And what? '

" Clem, they...they had a file on McCarrolls Ranch."

" _Fuck"_  Clementine spits angrily  
"You don't think...?"

"That they were responsible for the attack? Well, if you're saying that there's a bunch of kids kept here..."

"The children from McCarrolls..." Clementine realises in horror  
"The raid, all the children that were took... _Nathan_  took them?"

"I just... I still don't understand _why_. What does he gain from kidnapping _kids?_ "

"I'm not sure I want to know"

"You should have read some of the stuff they had on us. I still can't wrap my head around _how_  he found all this stuff out about us; Our nicknames, who we're in a relationship with, when and why we were sent to the school. They even knew all that happened to Violet, how she lost her eye and how that's changed her....  
I even saw _Marlon and Minnies_  name in there. How the _fuck_ did they find out about that?"

"God, how fucking long has-"

" _Louis_ " A clear voice rings out from somewhere within the hallway, the both of them instantly looking to the bars of their cell to try and see who was speaking.

"Middle Name; Alexander. Last Name; Unknown. Known Aliases; Lou and.. Idiot? Oof, I hope that's a term of endearment...."

Nathan steps into view, holding a piece of paper that Louis immedietly recognised as one of the files from the Ericsons folder he had found.

A guard standing off to the side of the cell opens the door for him, and Nathan takes a single step into the cell, dragging a simple wooden chair along the floor with him. Once inside, the door closes shut behind him.

"Age: Estimated 24-25 years. Known Relationships: Clementine. Now here, here's the important part"

Nathan places the chair in front of them and takes a seat, eyes focused solely on the paper he is holding, not even glancing in their direction as they stare up at him in bewilderment.

_" 'Louis' survival skills are as effecient as the others at the school. While he is able to complete tasks given to him, there can sometimes be moments of resistance and reluctance to do so. Despite this, he usually gets the important jobs done'_

Now _thats_  what I like to hear. Focus on what's important, am I right?"

Both Clementine and Louis have no clue what to say, looking to Nathan's who was sporting a wide smile, as if he was sharing good news with them.

" ' _Louis has also proved himself skillfull in combat. He has years of experience with melee weapons, most specifically blunt weapons, even having possession of his own weapon of choice, a chair leg'_  
Odd choice but hey, if this say it works, it's works.  
' _Aiming abilities have shown drastic improvement due to new training scheme put in place by Clementine. Vast improvements can still be made, but shows potential._

Its all sounding good for you, Louis. All sounding good. But... Here comes the tricky bit;

' _Weaknesses; Louis somehow has a problem in which he can either show extreme selfishness, or go the complete polar opposite and exhibit over protective mannerisms, both cases being a major flaw to his survival._  
_**NOTE** ; Selfish mannerisms have dramatically decreased, however, the protective mannerisms have greatly increased. Louis also shows extreme anxieties and issues with his self esteem, particularly in his own abilities. Quite often, he attempts to hide these both in over confidence, which more often than not gets him in dangeoru situations that could otherwise be avoided.'_

Overal Status: To be... Determined"

Nathan finally looks away from the paper, placing it down on his lap and peering down at the two huddled in the corner.

"What say you, Louis? Do you think you're salvageable?"

Louis says the only thing he can think of right now

"What the _fuck_  are you talking about?"

Nathan chuckles in response to this, placing Louis's file on the floor, allowing them to get a better look at the file for themselves.

"You know, that's fair, that's on me. I should probably explain a bit more"

"Nathan, what are you doing? Why are you doing this to us?" Clementine pleads, yanking on the ropes around her hands as she speaks.

"I'm sorry, guys. I really am." Nathan's says, sounding genuinly apologetic and saddened.

"I wanted to do this differently, to explain this to you in better circumstances. But then, we'll... I'd say a problem arose, but I don't look at it as a problem, more as... An opportunity."

"I saw all the kids you have down here."Clememtimr accuses, not caring about his apology.

"Some of them are so _young_ , how could you do that to them? To their families and loved ones? They all looked so-" 

"They looked what? Terrified? Like they were trembling in fear?" Nathan interrupted Clementine harshly  
"They didn't, did they? How _did_  they look?"

"Like... Like there werent really there...." Clementine answered, giving the answer Nathan was expecting to hear  
"Like they can't show any emotions."

"Who does that remind you of? You've seen them. Always there, but you barely pay attention to them. Such a vital cog to the machinery, but so lacking in personality"

"Your men... You're not saying...?" Louis slowly comes to the realisation

"Most of them were once the children held here" Nathan says what Louis had realised

"You're bulidng an army.. With the children you've stolen... Just like the Delta were..."

Nathan chuckles at this, but it's not a light sounding laugh, rather a dry, humourless dark laugh.

"We've been at war with the Delta for quite some time now. Now most groups we come across, they soon realise who is the more powerful of the two, easily prepared to submit. But the Delta... Oh, they weren't quite as ready to accept defeat.  
You know, they called us monsters, for what we do? So, you can imagine my surprise and well, quite frankly my delight when I hear from _you_  that they had begun doing the _exact_  same thing! It's fascinating what desperation can drive people to do, I suppose... "

" It was _you_? You're the group the Delta is at war with?"

" _Was_  at war with" Nathan corrects  
"I'll admit, they had us on our heels for a bit. I had lost a lot of my people, and a lot of my supplies. And then all of a sudden, we had them reeling. It was only a few more months after that they were wiped out. Like they were never there. For the longest time, I couldn't figure out _what_  had happened, how they suddenly turned so weak? I have to say, it was quite the surprise when I heard that some of their top soldiers had been wiped out by a bunch of _kids._ Without their usual, shall we say, ' _recruitment drive',_ the Delta were losing more than they could gain. Now, after hearing this, I just _had_  to meet the kids that had won the war for me"

"This whole thing... You've been planning this from the beginning? Meeting us, trading with us... It was all to find out more about us?"

"It wasn't easy. You were all quite... Secretive. Smart, really, but very frustrating for me."

"All of this effort... What for?"

"For the most important thing of all; The survival and continuation of the human race."

"You want to ensure the survival of the human race by... Murdering a bunch of people?" Louis clarifies

"Survival of the fittest. We as a species were once a population of nearly 8  _billion._ Now, well, I suppose we'd be lucky to be at a million...  
We're no longer the apex predator of this Earth. Instead, a mutated, virus controlled version of ourselves are. But that doesnt mean we have to go extinct. Doesn't mean we can't become the top of the food chain once more.  
Do you know what humanities greatest weakness is?"

Neither Louis or Clementine answer, remaining silent as Nathan goes on his spiel.

_"Compassion._ We're a social species, ingrained into our nature. It's lacking in some individuals of course, but not completely gone. It's hidden, deep down, the need to care for others.  
That's no use to us now. Now, it's what will get you killed. It's what makes your finger hesitate on the trigger as you stare down another human. It's what makes you think twice about taking food that you know belongs to someone else. It's what puts you in danger, when you find it difficult to put down a bitten loved one, even a loved one that's already turned. It's nothing but _weakness_  
I can't remove that from people, not completly. But I can help _repress_  it."

"By locking kids in the dark?" Clementine asks in disbelief

"You take away those comforts. Take away those positive human interactions. You teach them of the dangers, teach them how to confront a situation. Teach them to follow orders. I teach them how to _survive_."

"What kind of a life is that?"

"The kind where they stay alive" Nathan responds bluntly.  
"Does an animal born in captivity miss the wild, when they never experience what there is to miss?"

"Surely some of those kids would remember their past lives? Remember the ones that had cared for them?"

"And that there is one of the problems. My program works best with younger children, newborn to around 5 years of age. Their younger minds are a lot more... Influential. The older ones, well.... Sometimes they break. Sometimes their minds can be altered."

"And the ones who don't?" Louis asks

Nathan's gaze slides over to Louis. He doesn't answer the question.

"What about the others? The adults of the groups you... Obersve. What happens to them?"

"All comes down to them" Nathan answers  
"If they're willing to help me in me efforts, and prove themselves to be loyal... They're more than welcome to stay. Unfortunately, most of them feel the need to fight back. It typically doesnt last long. If we're lucky, some of their group members are pregnant. In that case, they're treated with the upmost care. They live here, on base, as comfortable as they can be, until the birth of their child. "

"No mother would agree to this" Clementine tells him

"No. They usually don't. It's not as if I'm giving them a choice. But you know what? I've kept their children _alive_. Those that complete training, it's very rare for them to be killed, even injured while out on duty. And you know what that shows?"

"That you're insane?"

"That it _works_ " Nathan answers his own question, ignoring Louis' remark  
"You can call me a monster, say I'm insane, that I'm going to Hell. But I rest easy knowing I keep my people _alive_. And that they will go on doing my work, creating and training more people to be like _them_. To be survivors."

"Then... What do you want with us in all of this? Why havent you just... _wiped us out_ , like you did with the others."

"If I knew nothing about you, that would have been the plan. But after hearing all you did with the Delta, I had a hunch you would all be special. I just needed the information to prove it."

"How did you do it? All you found out about us, even the pictures... How?" Clementine asks

"All part of a _very_  elaborate plan. I knew I had to build up trust with you guys first, so I began the whole _'trade'_ agreement. I also knew that, at some point, there would be no better way of gaining your trust than be extending an offer to my home. Of course, I couldn't let you see what was _really_  going on, not yet. So, I built a front. Most of what you see is real, the coming and going of my men, the buildings and services we have. I just had to... Put on a show. To be the caring, compassionate yet powerful ally. I even momentarily remove a kid from the program to be part of the 'illusion'. "

"Ben...His mother didn't die in child birth, did she?"

"Oh, she did. Which turned out to be much better for us in the long run. As you said, mothers don't usually want this for their children..."

"You did all this, for _us?"_

"Not just that. That's not even the most elaborate epart of it all"

Nathan seemed to be taking great enjoyment over his story, practically shaking with excitement. It seemed that this had been something he had kept hidden for quite a while, and was revelling in the opportunity to tell them all about it.

"No matter what I did, you just didn't seem willing to let me see the school. I couldn't say anything about it, otherwise I would arouse your suspcision. No, I needed information from an insider. But there was no way I would get any of you to betray eachother, that I already knew.  
Thus, begins the plan. Thus, begins the story."

"The story?"

"A girl, severely injured, found in the snow, not far from your school. I knew you wouldn't be able to turn her away. We spent so long writing up that sob story, the whole dead parents, evil previous group, all that shit that you all lapped up as the truth.  
It would be difficult, and there wasn't any guarantees. Oh, but she fit _right_ into your group, now didn't she?"

It felt like someone had punched Louis in the chest. He couldn't believe it, didn't _want_ to believe it. But now, it was starting to make so much more sense. Who else would be able to find out so much information about them all? Who else would be able to take those photos of them all, without them realising it was for ill purposes?

"Zara..." Clementine breathed out her name in betrayal  
"No, she...she said.... Her previous group, they..."

"It was all a story. And she acted it out _beautifully."_ Nathan says, a hint of pride in his voice. 

"None of it was real? All of her past, her parents... Her dad having his throat slashed..."

"Her dad is alive and well. In fact, you're looking at him right now."

Scrap the punch in the chest, it was like someone had ripped his heart out and slapped him round the face with it. 

"No..."

"I'm afraid so"

Louis had had enough. He didn't want to hear about how they had all be tricked, about his insane ramblings, about... About Zara..

"You still haven't told us What. You Want. With _Us."_  Louis demanded, letting the frustration he was feeling spill into his tone.

Nathan didn't look all too happy about being interrupted, but he mostly manages to cover it up. His mouth slowly shuts as he looks over to Louis, a more conflicted and almost sad look crossing over his face.

"See, I like you guys. I _really_ do. it was never my intention, but... As I said... Compassion is a weakness..."

"You can't just _alter_ our minds" Clementine argued

"No, you're too old for that. Too... Set in your ways. But you two...you have potential. I want you to join me, join this group, Not as one of my soldiers, but as one of my right hand men. I want you to help me in training the kids."

" _What!?_ "

"You all have valuable skills that can be passed on. Scavenging, Fighting, Shooting, Hiding, Hunting, Fishing, Cooking, Healing." Nathan implored, leaning forward in his chair as he spoke. 

"I understand its all a bit much now, but you need to see that I'm offering you a lot here, to you and your group. You could live a comfortable life here.

You, _and_  your little one"

"You're dead if you so much as lay a finger on AJ" Louis threatened, the familiar burn of anger rising in his chest.

"AJ? Oh, trust me, AJ will be a _very_ valuable addition to our group. There's not much I'll have to do as, from what I've heard, his way of thinking wasn't all that different from mine, not too long ago. I heard all about what he did to Marlon. And my God, taking down Lilly? One of the top minds of the Delta? That kid is something special.

Yes, AJ will be good for us. But... I wasn't talking about him."

Louis followed Nathan's gaze as he raised a hand in front of him, pointing with his forefinger to Clementines stomach.

"I was talking about _your_ little one."

Louis could feel his eyebrows furrow in confusion, looking between Nathan's extended finger and Clementine.

"What are you talking about?" Louis asked Nathan

Nathan looked just as confused as he did now, dropping his hand and cocking his head slightly. You could almost physically see the light bulb turning on above his head as the realisation struck him, looking over to Clementine.

"You haven't told him yet?"

"Told me what?" Louis asked, feeling more and more frustrated with being left out of the loop.  
"Clem, what's he-"

He had to do a double take, for he had been expecting to see was an equally confused and outraged Clementine looking back at him. Instead, her face had turned pale, refusing to meet his eyes, keeping her gaze on her tied hands in front of her.

"Clem?"

"I wasn't sure...." She begins in a whisper, still not meeting his gaze  
"I'm _still_  not sure. Doctor Williams thinks I am, but... There's no definitive answer yet."

"Answer for _what_?"

Clementine sighed, though her breath comes out trembling, accompanied by a stray tear escaping and slipping down her face.

"I think I might be pregnant"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLS DON'T KILL ME OKAY, I'M SORRY! IT HAD TO BE DONE! IT'S FOR THE PLOT! 
> 
> But on the other hand, my God does it feel good to finally get that part out. This is what I've been basing my whole fic around. You know when I first thought up the plot of this fic? It was the end of March, not long after The Walking Dead finished.  
> I've been waiting nearly 6 months to write and upload this chapter, (wasn't expecting for it to take nearly 150,000 words to get there, but here we are.) 
> 
> I hope you don't hate me forever for what I've done...


	16. Chapter 16

There's a million questions on the tip of Louis' tongue, but his mouth simply doesn't want to cooperate with his brain. He's fully aware he must look like an idiot with his mouth hung open and eyes so wide they threatened to pop out of his head, but there's not much else he can do when his brain is shutting down from the shock.

"Now, people might call me a monster" Nathan suddenly interrupts, snapping the two out of the moment, amidst Clementines huge confession.  
"But I at least have the decency to know you guys might need a moment. A lot of emotions right now, a lot to deal with. You have a big decision to make, and I'm sure it's not easy after finding out, well, _y'know_."

Nathan stands from the chair, threading his arm through the gap at the back and hoisting it up, giving them a polite nod before he heads over to the door.

"Just... Think about it, okay?"

"And what if we come to a decision you don't like? What then?" Clementine asks weakly

There's a few moments of awkward silence after Clementine says this, the both of them staring each other down.

"That's why I'm giving you the time to think about it"

And with that, he let's the door slam shut behind him, and Nathan dissapears out of view, leaving the two alone in the cell once more, the only company being the guard stood diligently nearby, just barely out of sight.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Louis asks Clementine after a minute of silence, still trying to process his thoughts.

"I didn't want to say I was when I didn't know. There were a few signs that I recognised from Christa and Rebecca, but... I chalked the vomiting up to a bug and well, my period hasn't exactly ever been regular, so..."

"How did Nathan find out, then?"

"Zara" Clementine answered, slamming her head back into the wall behind her just a little too hard, closing her eyes in both physical and emotional exhaustion,  
"I started to worry that maybe I was, and she saw me vomiting one morning, so... I told her. Its part of why I wanted to come here. After Zara suggested it, of course..."

"Why did you want to come here?"

"While I trust Ruby's opinion... I thought surely the best person to go to would be an actual Doctor. You know, one that has a hospital, where they might be able to run some tests?"

"Oh..."

"We never got round to the tests. I told him I thought I was pregnant, my symptoms, all of that. He went to speak with a guard after that, I assume to tell Nathan. Few minutes later, I'm down here tied up"

Clementine glances nervously to the guard stood nearby just out of sight, clearly already cooking up a scheme to get them out of the predicament they had found themselves in. It would be in their best interest for Louis to be doing the same, but at the moment hes staring numbly in shock at the floor.

"Pregnant..." He mutters half heartedly, testing out the words.

"Louis, I get that this is a big thing, but there's something more important going on right now" Clementine hisses at him, keeping her voice as quiet as possible so the guard wouldn't hear them.  
"We _need_ to find a way out of here."

"Right..." Louis responds, sounding like he hadn't even heard Clementine properly in the first place.  
"I mean, right. Yeah, holy shit. Let's uh... Let's see...Here, give me your hands. Let me see if I can untie them..."

Louis continues to speak in a hushed tone, shooting brief glances over at the guard with every syllable, waiting for him to march over to them, catching them in their escape.

Clementine does as he asks, and he begins pulling desperately at each strand of rope on the knot, trying to find where he can loosen it and get started on removing them.

He's not too sure why he expected it to be easy, because it's most definitely not. With how restricted his own hands are, it's next to impossible to pull the rope that was tied around Clementines hands as much as he wanted. That in itself didn't matter all that much either, as the ropes didn't even budge when he pulled and yanked as hard as he could, feeling so solid and confining that they seemed more like metal handcuffs than a few flimsy pieces of rope.

"Damn" Louis huffs, dropping his cramping hands away in defeat.  
"It's not budging"

"I'm not sure what that would do anyway" Clementine says gloomly, gesturing her head at the guard.  
"Not much we can do with him here. Even if he wasn't here, they've stripped me of all my weapons. Which I'm assuming they did to you?"

"My pockets feel considerably lighter, so I'm gonna say yeah"

" 'S what I thought... There's _nothing_  we can use to get out of here. I.... I don't know what to do, Louis"

He had never heard Clementine sound quite so defeated. Even when facing down Lilly and her group, trapped in the brig, she was ready and ambitious about finding a way out of there. It was a contrast to how she was now, the panic and dread settling in her eyes as she desperately searched around their jail cell for something to use.

"Clem, we-"

Louis is interrupted by pounding footsteps making their way down the hallway, becoming louder and louder the closer the walker comes to them. All thoughts of escape fly out the window, staring dejectedly at the bars of their cell, expecting to see Nathan pop back into their field of view.

It isn't, however. Instead, a rather frantic and hurried looking Doctor Williams appears, glancing periodically over his shoulder, looking down both ends of the hallway. The guard unlocks and pulls open the door to their cell, allowing Doctor Williams entry inside.

Only this time, instead of closing the door once he is inside and returning to guard duty, the guard steps into the room himself, standing slightly off to the side of Doctor Williams who is barely through the threshold of the door before closing it behind the both of them.

With a jolt of surprise, Clementine and Louis saw that it was actually Alex who had been their guard this whole time, as stoic as ever.

"Doctor Williams?" Clementine asks inquitizevly, unsure as to why he had come down to see them.  
"Alex? What are you-"

"Listen, I don't have much time" Doctor Williams says urgently, still glancing over his shoulder ever now and then to the hallway behind him.  
"We're going to get you out of here"

Apparently, the surprises just keep coming, Louis and Clementine looking to one another in shock an dutter confusion.

"You're... Helping us?" Louis asks, thinking it was sounding too good to be true.  
" _Why_? Aren't you like...Nathans best friend?"

"I am" Doctor Williams agrees, looking pained with what he was saying.  
"Which is what makes this do hard. But also what makes this so _important_."

"Why should we trust you?" Clementine demands sharply  
"You've been helping him kidnap kids for _years._  Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Nathan, he... He only wants what's best. He can't see the damage hes doing, but... He truly believes that what he's doing is right. Everyone's the hero in their own story, afterall...  
There's a certain bond you make with others, when you serve. The kind of bond that's very hard to break. For this sake, I helped him in his...'vision'. He really thought he was helping people, and he seemed so _sure_ of himself, that I couldn't help but believe it too.  
There's only so many years of watching others suffer before you break. Trufully, it happened a long time ago for me. But what could _I_  do? I could never see a way of changing things for the better, a way of actually _winning_  this. Until now. Until I met all of you."

"You want our help? To what, take down Nathan and his whole army? Seriously?"

"Not just you" Doctor Williams insists, glancing worriedly over to Alex, who was watching the all go down in his usual silent manner.  
"Not the thing to focus on right now. Now, we need to get you out of here. There's a second exit out of here, not used as frequently as the main one, so there's never anyone guarding it."

"Which way is it?" Clementine asks

"Uh.... Okay, left from this cell, follow all the way to the end, the second to last door to your left. Keep going down there until you reach a junction, turn right, then there's your exit"

"Left, second to last on left, right, got it" Clementine repeats, ingraining the instructions into her head.

"Zara will be waiting for you by the exit-"

_"What?"_

"Trust me, I know all that you must have heard. I can't explain it all right now, Zara will once you're out, but... You need to trust me, okay? Trust me that you can trust her"

"Why the hell would we do that?" Louis asks in demand, still feeling the sting of betrayal in his chest

"You don't know the whole story, okay? Everything that we're planning here... Zaras been working behind the scenes for a damn long time now. Just... Give her a chance, let her give her side of the story. At least let her help you get out of here."

"Fine" Clementine agrees, though sounds none too happy about it.

Doctor Williams gives her a sympathetic look, eyes darting over to Louis before resting back on her. He reaches a hand into his coat pocket, withdrawing a small box that she doesn't recognise, though is clearly able to make out the printed ' **PREGNANCY TEST** ' along the top in bold, blue letters.

"Without any tests, I can't give you an answer for certain" Doctor Williams tells her, gently placing the box into her hands.  
"But in my medical opinion, from what you've told me... I'd say the answer is probably yes. For now, this is the best way you've got for knowing for sure."

"Thank you" Clementine says, staring bleakly down at the box in her hands.

"Good Luck" Doctor Williams rushes out as he himself darts out of the cell, frantic footsteps leading away until everything goes silent once more.

"Boss will be back any second" Alex's announces, low voice breaking the silence.  
"You need to go."

"Alex..." Clementine begins gently, struggling to find the right words for her next sentence.  
"Why... What made you decide to help us? Weren't you... One of Nathan's kids, one of his-"

"A result of his program" Nathan aays, giving a stiff nod.  
"He thinks the training is completly effective. For the most part, it is. He did what he set out to do, he kept me alive. Taught me a how to keep myself alive.  
This? This is no life to live. It was a risk to send me out to meet you guys, to let me see that... That some form of happiness, even a type of _normality_  is possible.  
When... When I lost Jack, I... "  
Alex trails off, shaking his head in irritation  
"I knew my brother better than anyone. So I know how he felt when he was about to die. It was relief. Relief that he get to leave this hell hole existence, even better, that he got to save a life while doing it"

Louis shuffled uncomfortably on the floor at this

"I've never seen Doctor Williams so sure that we can make a change. He really thinks you guys will be the ones to do it. So if you can stop countless of other children from living the same life I have? I'd say it worth it."

With that, Nathan pulls a knife from the sheath attached to his hip, dropping down to his knees next to them and slicing through the ropes around them easily. The two of them spring up to their feet as soon as they are free, relieved that they had their full range of motion back once more.

"Here, take this" Alex says as he reaches a hand behind his back, withdrawing a single pistol and handing it over to Clementine.  
"You'll need it more than I will"

"Alex, I-"

"You should probably take this, too"  
Alex interrupts, yanking a key off a chain on his hip and passing it to Louis.

"What's it for?" He asks, staring down at the silver key in his hands with a confused expression.

"It's the key to the cell" Alex answers.  
"We don't want Nathan getting suspicious that someone just _let_  you out, know that you have help on the inside. We need to stage this so it looks like you broke out by yourself."

"What about you?" Clementine asks worriedly  
"Nathan saw you were on guard duty, won't he suspect that you had do something to do with this?"

Alex gives her a small, sad smile, and she's fairly certain it's the only time she's ever seen him smile, at least at her.

"You don't have to worry about that."

They barely even have the time to frown in their confusion before Alex has lifted the knife in the air, and the sickening realisation of what he's about to do hits Louis hard.

_"NO-!"_

But its too late to stop him. Alex swings the knife down hard, plunging it into his own stomach. He gives a pained, almost suprised sounding grunt in response, stumbling backwards into the wall, sliding slowly down until he reaches the floor, collapsing into a heap.

With the last of his strength, he twists the knife around in his own gut, unable to stop the whimpers of pain that escape him. He yanks the bloodied knife out, tossing it in their general direction, looking to them with eyes that were slowly beginning to glaze over.

"Take.... It...." He rasps out, hands splayed uselessly to his side, a puddle of blood steadily growing by his side with every passing second.

"Shit!" Louis can't help but say in shock and horror, hands fisting in his dreads at the sight in front of him.

"Please..." Alex croaks out as Clementine slowly scoops down to pick up the knife, pausing momentarily to look at him when he spoke.  
"Help... Them...The kids... They don't.... Deserve...."

Alex doesn't get to finish his sentence. His eyes relax from their pained expression, becoming unseeing. The rest of his muscles slowly untense, and then he tilts over onto his side, forever resting on the concrete floor of the jail cell.

"We need to go" Clementine asys shakily, tugging on Louis' jacket sleeve as she speaks.  
"C'mon, we have to go"

Louis blindly takes the knife she was pushing into his hands, placing it in his pockets as he stared down at Alex's corpse. With a deep gulping swallow and a shaky breath of air, he crouches down by Alex's side to gently brush his hand over Alex's eyes, closing his eyelids.

"Goodbye, Alex. Now, both you and your brother saved our lives. We'll do all we can do to repay you. We'll do what you asked. I'll make sure of it."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's a huge relief that he doesn't have to use the knife stained with Alexs blood in their trek through the underground hallways. It's not a relief however, having to walk past the jail cells that seemed to stretch on forever, their contents revealing exactly what Nathan had been speaking about. Countless eyes of children stared at them as they made their way through the maze like hallways, blank expressionless faces barely giving them a glance, despite their obvious escape attempt.

"This is it. If Doctor Williams was telling the truth, that is..." Clementine said once they reached an old and barely used looking door, wincing at the squealing of th rusted hinges as she forces the door open.

The door pulls open with force that isn't her own, and she immedietly drops the weight of the door to grab the pistol Alex has given her, aiming out of the now open doorway to whoever was opening the door.

Her pistol is perfectly lined up with the barrel of another pistol, held by a concerned looking Zara. As soon as Zara sees that its them, she drops her pistol back down, glancing over their shoulders to make sure they hadn't been followed.

Truth be told, Clementine didn't really feel like lowering her gun.

"We haven't got much time" Zara informs them, gesturing at them with her hand to follow her lead.  
"There's a smaller gate on the west side of the compound that only really gets used for bring in stuff from supply runs. There's usually only one guard covering it, and they should be changing over right about now."

Clementine purses her lips, wanting nothing more than to ignore Zaras instructions and find a way out without her. In the end though, she knows that Zara is the best way out of here, especially if what Doctor Williams said was true.

Zara doesn't notice their hesitancy, nor the waves of anger rolling off of them, too focused on getting them the hell out of the base.

They keep crouched down low as they hurriedly make their way through he base, hugging the sides of buildings to use as cover from the soldiers that were ever present around the base. They follow Zaras lead, keeping their eyes trained on her as she gives them signals to wait once they reach the edge of a building, taking a few seconds to scan the area and ensure its clear before signalling them to continue moving.

Clementine can hear her own heartbeat in her ears, and despite how quiet she knows they are being, she can still hear their footsteps despite her rapidly beating heart taking up most of her hearing, sounding more like booms of thunder than gentle steps across the cement paths of the base

Once the gate Zara had mentioned comes into view, Zara starts to pick up the pace a little,as eager to get out of there undetected as they were. As she had predicted, there were no guards in sight. Zara was able to pull the gate open for them, looking around wildly for any unknown lookouts that could have been stationed outside without her knowledge. Seeing nothing, she nods at them to follow her through the gate.

Zara doesn't say anything once they're outside the gate, continuing to lead them down the road away from the base. As soon as she can, she diverts their path into the trees, staying near the edge of the woods so they could still see the road on the opposite side of them, follow in its direction.

Once she felt like they were a safe distance away from the base that they wouldn't be noticed, and that they hadn't been followed, she slows her pace to a stop and turns to address them.

"I stashed a car nearby, not too far away from here. If we continue down this path, we should get there soon, ten minutes top"

There's a thousand different things she wants to say to Zara right now, none of them good. The logical part of her brain is the only thing stopping those words from spilling out. Instead, she takes a deep and calming breath, turning to look at Louis next to her.

He looked angry too, as he rightfully should. But she could also see this overwhelming tiredness in his features, and she has to remind herself that not only is Louis dealing with the aftereffects of the drugs, but that he's also dealing with the news of Zara and Nathan, and the possibility of her pregnancy, just as she was.

She can tell there's something he wants to say, but he remains quiet. Whether that's that feeling so tired, or simply because he doesn't know what to say, she doesn't know. Either way, he's looking expectedly at her, waiting to see what her next move would be.

"Lead the way" She tells Zara trying her best to keep the anger out of her voice. It doesn't work, as she sees the subtle flinch in Zaras face, averting her eyes down to the ground and giving a rapid nod before scuttling away from the two of them, heading deeper into the forest.

They follow, keeping a few paces behind Zara. She's close enough that they can keep an eye on her, but far enough away that she's out of earshot. This would be the perfect opportunity for the two of them to talk about her, about what they were going to do, but Clementine isn't entirely sure if she can do it without raising her voice, to keep her emotions out of the discussion. Louis is tense and quiet next to her, and she get the feeling he doesn't really feel like taking about anything right now, leaving her to wallow in her own feelings on the matter, trapped with her own thoughts as they make their way towards the supposedly stashed car.

Appears Zara wasn't lying about that either, as an old, slightly beat up looking Jeep comes into view. Zara slows down her walking to let them catch up to her, not really taking much notice to how rapidly Clementine was approaching her before it was too late.

"Who do you think should-"

Clementine lands a solid punch to the side of Zaras face, making her stumble into the side of the car with the force of the hit. Every fiber of her being wants to land a few more hits, but she reels herself in. Louis looks torn, unsure whether he wants to step in and stop the brewing fight, or to say what was really on his mind.

Clementine whips the bloodied knife out of her pocket, shoving Zara into the side of the car and pinning her to it by placing an arm just below her neck, raising the sharp edge of the blade to rest along her throat. The feeling of the cold metal against her skin forces Zara to push her head up and way from the threatening object, swallowing nervously, still unable to meet Clementines fire filled gaze.

"The _only_  reason you're not dead right now is that we need someone to drive the car" Clementine whispers to her in a dangerously low voice, pushing the knife closer to the skin of the throat to the point where its about to break.  
"That, and to get whatever information we need from you. And believe me, we _will_  get that information from you. its up to you to decide _h_ _ow"_

"You don't need to threaten me" Zara tells her, weakly holding onto Clementines arm to tug the knife away from her throat.  
"I'm on your side-"

 _"Dont"_ Clementine barks  
"I don't want to hear it. Not right now. Now, you're going to get us back _home._ You're going to tell everyone what happened. I'm going to give you the chance to explain yourself. Then we'll decide if you're really on our side. Got that?"

Clementine waits until she gets a tiny nod from Zara, who didnt want to move her head too much in case it forced the knife to slice into her skin. Clementine keeps the knife there for a few more tense seconds before dropping it back down, making sure Zara could see that she still had it firmly in her grip as she gestured for her to get into the car.

The gentle hum of the engine is a good replacement to the silence they find themselves in within the confines of the car. Zara mostly keeps her eyes trained on the road ahead, but Clementine can see her sneaking glances at both her and Louis ever now and then. Each time, she's met with a scathing glare, and swiftly returns her gaze back to the road.

"Does...Does Louis know? About-"

"Yes" Clementine curtly answers, cutting Zaras question off.

"I---I'm sorry that-"

"We don't really want to hear your apogoies" Louis speaks up from the back, keeping his eyes pinned to the passing scenery outside his window.

Zara seems to deflate even more a this, not used to hearing such hatred in Louis's voice, hatred that she's knows is aimed at her. Not just that, but the clear hurt in his tone as he spoke.

"Did Alex decide not to come?" She risks asking another question, keenly aware of Alex's absence the second they had opened the door out of the undergounrd cells.  
"He mentioned he would prefer to continue working form within the base, but he was supposed to come with us-"

There's a small hitch in Louis's breath at the name, enough to make her trail off in her own sentence. She nearly finches hard enough to jerk the steering wheel when Clementine flings the knife she had been holding onto the dashboard of the car.

"See the blood on that knife" She asks Zara, not bothering to wait for her answer before continuing.  
"That's his"

Zara whips her head over to Clementine, eyes wide and heart sinking at her words.

"Did you-?"

"He killed himself" Louis says hoarsely, and she glances at the rear view mirror to lock eyes with him.  
"He killed himself, to cover our escape. To escape the fucked up life _your_ dad put him in.  
So no, I don't think Alex will be coming with us"

She's smart enough not to ask any more questions after that.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The rumbling of a car engine not too far away is enough for everyone in Ericsons to have gathered by the school gates, defences at the ready by the time they get back to the school, the sun just beginning to set on the hellish day they had experienced.

They hadn't expected for them to have come back this early. And they _certainly_ weren't expecting to see Clementine leading Zara towards the gates of the school, pushing her along by the tip of her gun.

"Zara?" Violet asks, voice full of confusion and shock, pushing everyone out of the way to get a better look.

As soon as she gets a good view of the gun pointed at Zaras back, Violet rushes to the small door beside the main gates, swinging it open and rushing out. She doesnt make it much further than that, her legs having stopped working from the shock of it all.

"Clem, what the _HELL_  are you doing?" Violet demands, letting her voice rise in volume a little more than she wanted to.

Zara winces at the sound, even though its not being directed at her right now. Louis is trailing not too far behind the both of them, and Violet knows the pitied look hes giving her isn't a good sign.

"What's going on?" Violet asks breathlessly, and she doesn't know who exactly she's addressing the question to. Or, who she wants to _answer_  the question.

"Could I talk to Violet in private about this first?" Zara asks Clementine quietly, still struggling to meet her gaze.  
"Please"

"No" Clementine tells her, giving her the answer she had been expecting  
"No, you're going to explain all of this shit to _everyone,_  because they deserve to hear it all from _you._ Hear what you _did._ Then, _then,_ if you're lucky, and if Violet _wants_ to, you can speak with her"

Zara finally looks Clementine in the eyes, holding her gaze sorrofully for a few moments before she drops her eyes back to the ground, giving a defeated nod. With that, Clementine nudges the end of her pistol into Zaras back, urging her to continue moving forward into the school.

The walk upstairs to Marlons old office is by no means a long one, but the unbearable silence that surrounded them seemed ot make their short jaunt drag on forever. All of the occupants of Ericsons trailed behind Clementine, not specifically asked to follow, but knowing there was no way they were going to be left out of whatever was going down.

Once everyone has entered the room, Clementine closes the door behind them all, perhaps a little harder and louder than she had intended to. A few startle at the slamming of the door, nerves on edge from the simmering fury they could feel coming from Clementine. Automatically, Louis made his way over to Violet, making sure to stand nearby, prepared for what would undoubtably be a distater.

Even though no one actually knew of any wrong doing that Zara had done, they had all already seperated away from her. While most of them were huddled together around the room, Zara was the only one left out, stood by herself near the far wall, looking as if she was seconds away from throwing up.

"What are we doing here, Clem?" Violet asks, voice already sounding broken, fearing the worst.  
"Why all the hostility, the gun? What the hell _happened?"_

"We were attacked by Nathan and his group" Clementine replies  
"Me and Louis were thrown into a cell. Nathan even drugged Louis to get him down there"

There's an uproar of noise, first quiet, hushed murmuring which evolves into full on exclaims from various people around the room, shock being replaced by anger with each passing second.

"Nathan _attacked_  you? Wha-Why?"

"Because its all been bullshit from the beginning" Louis says, everyone's head turning from Clementine to Louis.

"It wasn't anything out of the blue. Nathan's been watching us since before he even met us. In fact, it's the reason _why_  he met us." Clementine explains

"Not just us, either" Louis adds  
"Before the drugs knocked me out, I got a good look at some of his files. All different towns, all important information-"

"He has a file on the school?" Ruby asks worrriedly.

"The school, and everyone in it" Louis answers  
"Every small detail we know about eachother, even stuff that some of us in here don't know about the other. Nathan had it all written down, right alongside a little photo of _every_ one of us."

"He's been collecting information on _us?_ Why?"

"To find out if we're worth keeping around." Clementine tells them, resisting the urge to take a seat when the exhaustion of the day seems to roll over her.  
"Nathan, he's... He's building an army. Maybe, not building, but... Adding to the one he's got. He thinks that the only way to keep them alive is, well... To make them ruthless killers. To only care about themselves."

"And people _are joining_ that?"

"Not voluntarily. We weren't alone down in those cells. Nearly every one of them, they were.... Nathan had kidnapped _kids._ Some no older than 4, just....Keeping them stuck in the dark, barely any human interaction, _nothing._ And that's their life. That's all they grow up knowing. "

"Does... Does he want to do the same to us?" AJ pipes up, having mostly stayed quiet in all of this.

"Some of us" Clementine answers honestly, pain in her eyes as she looks at AJ  
"The rest of us, he wants to help teach the kids he's kidnapped. Train them to survive. If he's deemed you useful from the information he's got, that is"

"Its always gotta be something..." Aasim mutters bitterly

"What kind of 'i _nformation'_  are we taking about here?" James asks, directing the question mostly to Louis

"Things he shouldn't know about. Our nicknames for eachother, how old we are, what we're like, what we're good at, what we're _not_  good at. He even knows who we're in a relationship with, and _why_  we were sent here, before the apocalypse went down"

"But... How? They got all that from _watching_  us? And without us really _noticing?"_ Willy asks in disbelief

Neither Clementine nor Louis answer, first glancing at eachother, then both averting their gaze to the guilt ridden Zara, who seemed to be trying her best to sink into the wall and disappear.

"Now would be the time to tell them" Clementine says to Zara after the silence goes on for too long.

"They got it from me..." Zara confesses in a whisper, already cowering away from them all.  
"I was sent to join you all. To get closer, and... Find out all I could"

Louis kept his eyes focused on Violet in all of this, ready to react to however _Violet_  reacted to it all. Whether that be to hold her back if her anger gets the best of her, or to try his best to hold her together as she crumbles apart.

She's not doing either of that, though. She's quiet, perhaps a bit unnervingly so, but there's not exactly much he can do that. She's frozen in place, so still you can barely see her breathing, and he can only imagine she's breaking apart on the inside.

"But... I _found_  you" James says the fact more like a question, confusion clear in his voice as he speaks.  
"You were... You were nearly dead? How could-"

"It was all fake. Once we decided the only way to do all of this would be through an insider, we created this whole story for me. Had to make it seem as real as possible, so... Dad made sure he was the one to take the knife to me, cut me up, give me some bruises. Make it... Believable"

"Nathan is... He's your dad? And... all these years, they were... All fake?" Omar asks

"Not for me" Zara insists, lifting her gaze to look Violet directly in the eyes as she says this.

"Then... Why? Why do all of this, why keep it up?" Louis asks, torn between wanting to stay by Violet, but also wanting to stand by Clementines side.

"Because he's my dad" Zara replies, voice beginning to choke up  
"I didn't know what else to do, what _he'd_  do if I said No..."

"What made you change your mind?" Clementine asks, pushing herself off the desk and stepping closer to Zara, who involuntarily flinches at the movement.  
"You helped us escape. And from what Doctor Williams said, you've been working on this for a while now."

Zara laughs at this, but it's short, loud and breathy, sounding as if she hadn't even meant to laugh in the first place.

"I met all of you" Zara answers Clementines question.  
"You all showed me what life _can_  be like. That you don't have to be inhuman to _survive._ And I.... I had never expected to fall in love"

A small, broken sob follows this, the first sound Violet had made in all of this. Violet has a hand to her mouth, like she didn't want to have made the sound, eyes scrunched up and head bowed. Louis' arms twitch in Violets directions, wanting to comfort her, but knowing that doing so could backfire right now.

"Is that why you didn't tell your dad about you and Violet?" Louis decides to ask instead  
"You told him about me and Clem, and Ruby and Aasim. Nothing about it in Violets."

"I've been trying to work out a way to stop my Dad for over _five_  years now." Zara says, confidence rising slightly  
"I had to keep up my dads belief in me, make sure he didn't suspect a thing. If he found out about me and Vi, it could have ruined everything. And... I imagine it would put a _massive_ target on Vi, so.... There's no way in hell I was going to put that down."

"Okay" Clementine announces suddenly, bringing everyone's attention back to her.  
"What exactly _is_  your plan then? How do you hope for us to take down his _whole_ army?"

Zara clenches her jaw, taking a deep, steadying breath in at the request.

"Please...." She begins in a beg, eyes deeply searching Clementines for any signs of sympathy.  
"Please... I've told everyone what I did. And I _will_  tell you my plan. But... _please,_ can I talk to Vi alone first?"

A part of her had been expecting another hit from Clementine, if not another denial or angry words. And for a few seconds after asking, it seems as if one of them were guaranteed to happen. Instead, Clementine glances over to Violet, her darkened glare immediately softening at the broken look on Violets face.

"Do you want to talk to her alone?" She asks Violet as softly as she can.

Not trusting her own voice right now in front of everyone, Violet gives a somewhat uncertain nod in answer.

Clementine keeps her gaze trained on Zara, heading over to Violet and passing her pistol over to her.

"Just.... Just in case" Clementine tells her, glancing once more at Zaras guilt ridden face before exiting the room, everyone else filing in behind her, leaving Zara and Violet alone in a room that now seemed much too big and empty.

"Please say something" Zara breaks the silence, standing on the opposite site of the room from Violet

"What do you want me to say?" Violet responds, arms crossed and gaze fixed downwards.

"Anything. What you're thinking, how you're feeling. Just... Give me something."

Violet charges towards her, and Zara instinctively backs up against the wall, pressing herself up against it as much as she can. In a blink, Violet is right in her face, arm risen with a pointed finger, expression of rage on her face. In another blink, the rage is gone, expression breaking and morphing, raised hand trembling in place.

A sob escapes her. Then another. And another. She forces herself to turn away from Zara, taking a few steps away and scrunching up her hair in her fists.

She let's out a few more sobs, and then she screams. A gutteral, angry, heartbroken scream, and it's enough to force the tears that had been building in Zaras eyes to spill over.

"Vi..."

" _Why did it have to be you!?_ " Violet asks in another sob, her voice a few octaves away from turning into a screech.  
_"Why?"_

"I'm sorry" Zara whispers in apology, knowing it doesn't meen a damn right now.  
"I know how _wrong_  it all is. I didn't back then. Never thought to question my dad, because.... He's the only family I have."

"We were your family" Violet retorts  
"We cared about you more than he _ever_  had."

"I know that now. That's _why_  I'm doing this, why I've _been_  doing it."

"That didn't stop you from telling him all about us. All these years, you managed to find out everything you could about us, and you dutifully passed it along."

"...Yes. I did. Its.... It why I would sneak out at night sometimes."

"You... You weren't having nightmares, were you?" Violet asks, realisation beginning to sink in.

"No. I wasn't."

"Every time... Every time I laid awake in bed, hating myself because I couldn't help you through them... You were sneaking out to tell them about us. About  _me?"_

"I had to" Zara says, tone pleading for Violet to understand.  
"If I just stopped, they would get suspicious. I tried my best to give them as little as possible, tried so _damn_ hard to keep you safe, especially after-" Zara suddenly stops talking, pausing for a moment before rapidly shaking her head side to side.

"After _what?"_ Violet asks angrily

"It's... Its what pushed me over the edge." Zara responds quietly.  
"I pass on the information to Dad, but... I never usually see his 'official' write up. One day I snuck a glance and saw he had done yours...  
My dad, he... He has kind of an... Assessment system. To decide if a person is worth putting time and effort into, if training would be effective. If you are, you're deemed 'Salvageable.' If not, you're deemed 'Unsalvagable'. When I saw your file, I.... I saw he had marked you as Unsalvagable"

"What happens if you're Unsalvagable?"

"You're disposed of. It's not the first time Ive seen him do it, but this is... This is the first time I _knew_  the person he would be doing it to. And God, it would be _you,_ and I _can't,_ I..."

"I can't believe what I'm hearing" Violet said in disbelief, waking away from Zara over to a desk by the door of the room, grasping it by the sides in an attempt to ground herself. Zara hesitates for a few seconds before walking over to Violet, tentatively placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Vi-"

Violet spun around at the touch, defeated expression revolving back to anger at being touched.

"I _loved_  you." Violet spat, shoving Zara hard away from her.  
"And now.... This. All of _this_ shit and honestly, why should I be suprised? Of course you turn out to be one of them..."

"I'm _not._ Vi, I'm not one of them-"

"I don't even know who you are anymore" Violet cut her off, words loud despite how quiet they were spoken.

"C'mon, Vi. Don't... Don't do that to me. C'mon, it's _me._ I havent changed."

"You expect me to believe that?"

 _"Yes._  I can't fake _this._  I am who I am, and that's who you _know"_

"Stop. Just... Stop...."

"I can't fake falling in love with you. Because I did, and I did hard. _Nothing_ will change that."

"Get Out" Violet demanded, refusing to look Zara in the eyes as she speaks.  
"I can't deal with this right now. I can't... I don't want to see you."

"You were right" Zara continues, stepping closer and ignoring Violets order  
"This _is_  my family. And that's why I'm doing this. I'm doing this for them.

 _"Get. Out."_ Violet repeats, voice warbling in anger.

"I'm doing this for _y_ _ou."_

Violet pulls the pistol out that Clementine had given her, aiming it squarely at Zaras chest. Obviously not expecting this, Zara takes a startled step backwards, hands raised and eyes wide. Violets arm trembled slightly, but she keeps the gun raised.

"I don't want to hear what you have to say anymore. I can't even stand to be in the same room as you right now. I won't tell you again.  _Get. Out_ "

Even if her vision wasn't as impaired, she was fairly certain she wouldn't have been able to see Zara properly through the blur of tears as she dissapears through the doorway. It's not until she hears the gentle click of the door shutting behind her that she let's herself slide down to the floor, tossing the gun across the room and burying her face into her hands, allowing herself to simply give into the tidal wave of hurt that had been trying to drown her.

What the hell was she supposed to do now?

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It felt like it had all those years ago, stood outside the door to Clementines room, unsure whether to enter, as if they hadn't been together for over 6 years now.

Onc he gathers enough courage and convinces himself he's just being stupid, Louis raises a timid hand to to rap on the door with his knuckles, pausing with his other hand on thehandle of the door for a moment before pushing it open.

Clementine looks as tired as he feels, and that's saying something. She's sat on the edge of their bunk, hand repeatedly rubbing against her forehead, trying to will away the headache that pounded away in her skull.

"Hey" He offers quietly in greeting, and she drops her hand away from her face to glance up at him.

"Hey"

Louis slips further into the room, quietly closing the door behind him before making his way over to Clementine and taking a hesitant seat next to her, leaning forward with his arms on his legs and blowing out a long puff of air.

"We, uh...We should probably talk about this more" Louis begins, turning his head to the side to catch her gaze.  
"Now that we're out of there and it's just us"

"Which part?" Clementine asks in exasperation.  
"About Nathan? What he's doing? About Zara, what she did, what she's apparently been doing to 'help' us, what we're supposed to _do_ with her? How were suppose to take on Nathan and an _entire_  army?"

"I think you know there's only one thing I'm thinking about right now" Louis replies, which forces Clementine to move her gaze to the floor.

"Right. _That..._ " Clementine mutters, letting her head fall back into her hands with a somewhat strangled sounding curse  
"We should have been more careful. I mean, this is....What are we going to do?"

"What is there to do?" Louis asks  
"If it turns out your pregnant then..Thats just how it is, right?"

"I just... We're not ready for a kid, Louis. _I'_ _m_  not ready..."

"What are you talking about? Out of everyone, _you're_ the most prepared one here. I thought you said you had been raising AJ since the day he was born? "

"Basically, but... this is different"

"How?"

"Because they would be _mine. Ours._ Louis, I.... I never really _wanted_  children of my own. I had my fill with AJ, I know just how difficult it was. I thought he would be _it_  for me. And now..."

"Clem, do... Do you not want this baby?" Louis asks

"I... I don't know..." Clementine admits guilty  
"It's all so complicated right now and... You have to admit, it's not the best timing"

"That would be too easy" Louis jokes along, but the small smiles it had elicited from the both of them were quick to disspear amongst the seriousness of the topic.

"It's hard for me" Clementine tries to explain, furrowing her eyebrows in frustration.  
"Its not just the whole 'raising a kid in the apocalypse thing', you know? After all, we're here now. I have you, and everyone else, a safe place to live, plenty of food, which is a hell of alot more than what I had when I was looking after AJ"

"So what has you so worried?"

"Before the apocalypse, I didn't really have much experience with pregnant woman. Even if I did, I was too young to really remember it. There are only two experiences I have had, and that was after this all started."

"I'm assuming AJ's mom was one of them?"

"She was. Rebecca was her name. The pregnancy made her _miserable._ She had a lot to deal with; a new little girl joining their group, living with the knowledge that you're bringing a child into a world that could end its life not long after its started, as well as hoping that your childs father was the man you loved, and not the man who forced you against your will"

"Yeah, that's.... Thats a lot. At least we don't have to worry about who yours is" Louis says with a small smile, gently nudging Clementines shoulder with his own.

"It seemed like she was always uncomfortable, every minute of every day. I was there, when AJ was born. The amount of blood, it... It just doesn't seem like something you can recover from"

"Was there a problem during the birth?"

"Im not completly sure. Rebecca was already weak from the cold and the starvation, which I'm sure didn't help. Either way, she had lost a _l_ _ot_  of blood, and we were forced to keep moving. She _barely_  had any time to be a mom before she passed. Before I... I had to shoot her, to save AJ"

"You had to do it, I'm sure she would have been happy that you saved her sons life, And I'm sure she's grateful for all you've done for him"

"But _she_  should have been there. She should have had the chance to watch her son grow up, to see the wonderful boy he's become.  
Louis, what if... What if I don't get that chance? What if I don't get to see _our_ child grow up?"

"That won't happen" Louis reassures her fiercely, shaking his head  
"Things are different. You wont be on the run, you'll have plenty of food and water to keep you and our kiddo happy and healthy. You'll have a roof over your head, a fire to keep you warm, Ruby to check up on you, and you can _bet_  your ass I'll be stuck to your side like a fly in a glue trap, doting to your every need and making sure you're under _no_  stress"

"Until you become the source of my stress." Clementine jokes quietly, getting a narrow eyed glare in response from Louis for the comment.

"I mean it, Clem. We aren't going to let that happen to you"

"You can't promise that, Lou. Things went wrong back before everything, back when there were fully working hospitals and doctors and every medicine under the sun. Now, its even more likely and if I lose too much blood.... That's it."

"You don't _know_  that" Louis insists  
"What happened to AJ's mom, that's... Its awful, Clem. But like you said, there was _so_ much shit going on. In the state she was in.... You won't be like that. You're going to have the best chance of having the kid and staying _healthy."_

"I hope you're right"

"So do I... But, hey!" Louis suddenly declares, to which Clementine raises an eyebrow at the enthusiasm that had entered his voice.  
"Put aside all the worries, all the 'what-ifs' of what could happen. Think about the posiitves. We're gonna have a _baby,_ Clem. We're going ot have a child, me and you will get to watch them grow."

Louis's wide grin and enthusiasm begins to rub off on her slightly, and she can't help the small smile that cracks through, shaking her head slightly at just how excited Louis had suddenly become at the idea.

"I mean I still can't believe it. _Our_ child..."

"Are you... Only just realising this?" Clementine asks in somewhat of a laugh.

"No! Kind of, I just... Didn't really let it sink in properly yet, y'know. And, it's- Oh, wait" Louis suddenly stops in his sentence, excited expression falling slightly.  
"We don't actually _know_  for sure, right? You might not even be pregnant."

Clementine looks to him for a moment before reaching into her coat pocket, pulling out a stick like object and passing it over to him. He frowns in confusion at it, eyes drawn to the little white square with two vertical pink lines.

"What am I looking at?" He asks, about to turn his head to look at Clementine when he realises for himself.  
"Wait is-Is this the pregnancy test Doctor Williams gave you?"

"It is"

"And does... The two lines, does it mean...?"

"I'm pregnant"

She had thought that saying the words out loud for the first time would have made it so much scarier. While it didn't make it all seem more real, she realised she wasn't as scared as she thought she would be. Sure, the worries are still there, but when she sees the bright grin on Louis's face at the words, she finds it easy not to think about them right now

"You're pregnant" Louis repeats, a bubble of laughter escaping him.  
"Clem, you're _pregnant"_

"Yeah, I thought we established that already" Clementine says, joining in on his laughter.

Next thing she knows, Louis has her wrapped up in a bone crushing hug, and she can still hear him giggling deliriously next to her ear, and her chest begins to shake as she tries to hold in her own laughter.

"I can't believe it, Clem. We're going to have a kid"

"Not if you crush the both of us" Clementine jokes, and Louis immedietly loosens his grip and shoots away from her, as if he had _actually_  been hurting her, looking slightly panicked.

"Lou, relax, Im just messing with you" She tells him fondly, and his whole posture seems to relax at the reassurance.

"This is really going to be something special" He says softly, looking down at the pregnancy stick in his hands with a small smile.  
"Wait, don't you have to pee on these things?"

"Yep"

"And.... I'm holding it"

"You are"

"I'm going to go ahead and... Put this down over here."

Clementine snorts in laughter as he drops the pregnancy test down on the table with a mild look of disgust, a stark contrast to the pure joy on his face moments before.

"So, what do you think it's going to be?" He asks once he's back to where he was sat.

"What?"

"Boy or Girl? Son or Daughter?"

"Louis, I can't be more than like, two weeks pregnant, how am I supposed to know?"

"I don't know, mothers instinct or something like that?"

Clementine huffs at this, shaking her head teasingly at him.

"Well, what would _you_  want them to be?" She asks him

"I think the proper answer here should be that I don't care" Louis answers.

"But..."

 _"But,_ I think, and kinda hope, that we're going to have a little girl"

"Whys that?"

"C'mon, really? What would be better than a mini Clementine clone running around? I mean, if we have a boy, it's going to be another me, and _no-one_  wants that."

"Speak for yourself" Clementine argues  
"I think it would be nice to have a boy, a little brother for AJ to look after"

 _"Or_ a little sister to protect. Not that she would need protecting, of course. Not when she takes after you"

"You know what? I'm certain it's going to be a boy" Clementine teases

"Oh really? What makes you so certain?" Louis teases back

"Like you said, my motherly instincts"

"You can't use that! Not when you said literally _two_  minutes ago that you didn't know! Besides, that kids half mine too! I would have had some say into what _she's_ going to be, because _we're_  going to have a _daughter"_

"Hmmm" Clementine hums, shrugging at Louis's insistences.  
"Still disagree with you. We're having a boy"

"Guess we'll just have to see" Louis says with a smile

"Yeah... Guess we'll just have to see..."


	17. Chapter 17

AJ didn't completely understand the concept of love when he was younger. The only type of love he had a clue about was familial love, the kind of love he had for Clem, having been raised under her watchful eye ever since he was a baby.

Because of this, it had taken him a while to adjust to the fact that now Clementine shared her love with someone else, in a way that was much different to the kind of love he knew. It had been confusing, and a little bit gross, but he eventually came to understand it. Understood that at the end of it all, Louis made her happy, as she did for him. And that was all that really mattered.

Which is why, he thinks, everything that had happened hurt just that little bit more. Not just for how he felt, no. Because Clementine and Louis hadn't been the only example of love he had watched grow alongside himself over the years. Now, as he timidly opened the door to Violet room, he could see just how _broken_ this whole ordeal had made her. And as painful it was to see one of his closest friends like this, he couldn't even begin to imagine how she must have been feeling right now.

"Violet?" He calls her name cautiously from the doorway, hoping to see a sign of life from the figure curled up on the bed.

Violet lifts her head up from her tucked knees, her one good eye taking a while to find and settle on AJ. Once she sees that it's him, she gives him a small, tired-looking smile, that takes much more effort than it should.

"Hey bud" Violet calls back, and AJ knows the hoarseness he hears in her voice can only come from hours of crying.  
"What're you doing here?"

AJ takes this as an invitation into the room, closing the door behind him as gently as he can before heading over to Violets side, hopping up and taking a seat next to her on the bed.

"I don't really know what's happening" AJ admits to Violet  
"But... I wanted to check you're okay"

"Appreciate it, little man" Violet tells him gratefully, her first real smile, one that doesn't have to force, appearing on her face.  
"You want the grown-up answer, or the kid answer?"

"I think I can handle the grown-up answer."

"Well....No, I'm not. I'm trying to see how there'll be a time where I am, but... It's hard to see"

"I think you will" AJ tells her confidently.  
"Be okay, that is."

"You sound so sure"

"You're one of the strongest people I know. I know you're hurting now, and that hurt might not ever really go away. But you'll find a way to deal with it. You always do."

"Yeah. I sure hope so..."

"You won't be alone through this, Vi. We'll all be here for you"

"It's... It's just hard right now, you know? Everything's still so fresh, and... I'm trying to think of anything else BUT that. It's not working all that while. It's all I can think about..."

"Clem said she wanted to speak to everyone about making a plan. But, she also said that would involve Zara. Are you gonna... Be okay with that?"

Violet let out a long puff of air which ended in a humorless chuckle, shrugging her shoulders at AJ.

"Not in the slightest. But it's not like I've got much of a choice."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's only a few hours later that Clementine has them rounded up in the schools dining room, one of the most unused rooms in the school. The large wooden dining table had been wiped down from dust, to make way for whatever plans Clementine was to layout.

The room was filled with a general hum of conversation, quiet murmurs between everyone as they discuss the potential upcoming plan. Clementine herself is currently the only one sat at the table, a sheet of paper in front of her and a pen in her hand as she draws up the layout of Nathan's base, both to the best of her knowledge, and the best of her memory. Louis is stood next to her, murmuring gentle notes in her ear about parts he remembers, parts that may help them in any way.

It's not until the whole room falls into silence that Clementine glances up from her work. There, stood awkwardly in the entrance to the room, is Zara. No one is looking to her in hatred, or in anger. Rather, everyone simply looks... Confused. Like they're not sure _how_ they're supposed to be feeling right now. Especially when Violet is in the room with them, looking to Zara as if she somehow holds the key to everything, and at the same time like she wants to be a million miles away from her.

"Alright guys!" Clememtine calls out, bringing their attention to herself.  
"I get that this is all a bit...Honestly, I don't know what to say it is. We're all upset, and a little bit shell shocked. But we can't let that consume us right now. Now, we need to find out a way to keep ourselves safe. And as odd as it feels, Zara _may_  have information that's useful to us."

"How do we know she won't lie about it?" Willy asks, glancing distrustfully to Zara.

"What good would that do me?" Zara replies, sounding as broken down and defeated as she looked.  
"I'd rather die than go back to the way I was living, in the comfort of belongings from people laid in a grave. I don't want that.  
I would have wasted _years_  of work-"

"What work?" Clementine interrupts in questioning.

Zara timidly made her way towards the table, everyone else in the room awkwardly shuffling out of the way to make room.

"There aren't many people that my Dad trusts. And the _only_ people he let's.... _train_  the children in his program are those he trusts. Luckily, being a family member tends to put you in the _trusted_  category"

"So you were one of the people hiding the kids away in dark cells?"

"Yes. I was." Zara admits.  
"But it's not like I could just have a change of heart and let them all go"

"Why not?"Aasim asks in a scoff

"Why not? Are you kidding me? I open those doors, you know what's going to happen? Those kids are all going to be dead. Dads men would simply shoot on sight, and it would be pretty obvious who let them out! If I was to help, I had to make sure my Dad didn't know a thing. And that's what I've done. "

"Okay, so... What did you to help?" Aasim follow up with another question

"You remember those photos on the files?"

"Vividly..." Louis mumbled quietly.

"Those weren't the only ones I took. They were the only ones given to my Dad, yes, but not the only ones I had."

"What were they of?" Clementine asks

"All of you".

"Us?"

"Yes. Just small moments throughout the years. A card game, stories by the fire, a joke that has you all laughing, or a joke that has you all groaning... Playing with Rosie, Two of you sharing food with one another, even something as simple as..."

Zara trails off, glancing over to Violet. She refuses to look away, waiting for when Violet hesitantly raising her gaze to meet her own, locking in once she does.

"-A rare smile"

"But... Why though?" Louis asks

"Why take the pictures?" Zara clarifies

"Well, yeah? What good are they going to do, other than serve as memories for us?"

"You see, that's exactly it. For you, it's a memory. For others, it's an opportunity to see into another world. A world that they have _no_  idea exists.  
For years, I've been going down to the cells for the ' _training'_  sessions. I'll enter the cell with those kids, bring a candle for some light, and we'll just talk. The kids know they're not allowed to, so it's hard to even get them engaged like that. But once they finally do... I have no words for it. It's like watching someone come back to life."

"Just by talking to them?"

"It doesn't happen all in one conversation" Zara replies  
"Like I said, this was _years_ of work. Whenever I came down to the base with you guys, that's where I'd be. And when it wasn't me, it was Doctor Williams."

"Really? What did he do?" James asks

"Same as me, mostly. Sit and talk about what life _can_  be like. Give them first hand experienced about the type of life they can have, if they want it. We use the photos too, mostly as evidence, I suppose you could call it. There's nothing more effective than backing up your story with an _actual_ photo of what you're talking about. It's... You can see the hope return to their eyes. It's brief, and usually pushed down not long after, but it's _t_ _here_."

"You think they'll help us?" Clementine asks

"Some of them, yeah. I'm certain of it." Zara confidently replies  
"There simply wasn't enough time to speak to all of them, and not everyone responded well. For some it's too late..."

"Help us with what?" Aasim says to Clementine in confusion  
"You think we can find a way to get them out of there?"

"Not exactly..." Clementine answers, tight-lipped.  
"This is different. Nothing like Lilly and her group, this is a completely different scale."

"So what are we going to do?" Ruby asks

Clementine worries her lip as she thinks, glancing up to Zara.

"How many of Nathan's army do you think will help us?" She asks.

"With Doctor Williams help? Maybe half, if I was to guess."

Clementine takes a moment to think, taking in a deep breath before addressing everyone else, who were patiently waiting for Clementines answer.

"We're not going to wait here to defend ourselves. We're going to strike first. We're attacking the base."

The room explodes into a cacophony of noise. Uncertainties and worries are thrown at Clementine from every angle. She first looks to Louis by her side, who by no means seems excited by the idea. She knows he will support her with whatever decision they come to, but it's clear this idea in particular isn't settling well with him.

"Guys!" Clementine shouts over the noise, her yell quickly quietening the room down.  
"Look, I get this is scary. You don't think I'm terrified about doing this? Of course I am! But Nathan knows where we are, and he has an entire army with him. If we have _any_ chance of surviving, we need to take him and his men by surprise."

"That...might work..." Zara pipes up quietly  
"Dads always raised the kids in this manner thats...I don't know, more animalistic, I suppose. Survival of the fittest. They look to the strongest person as their leader.  
You might not even have to take on the whole army. If we do this quietly and you... You only take out my dad? The others will be quick to back down once he's... Once he's dead. "

"And you're okay with that? Us killing your dad?" James asks her.

"What am I even supposed to say to that? He'll always be my dad, there's nothing that can change that. But I came to the realisation a long time ago that this couldn't go on. That eventually, it would end in his demise"

"Go in quietly..." Clementine mumbles to herself  
"Wouldn't happen to be any way in without them seeing us, would there?"

"Only one I know of is the one I took you guys through when we were escaping. You could be lucky and sneak in again when there's a guard shift."

Clementine looks over her drawing of the base for a moment before pausing, tapping at an area on the paper with her pen.

"What about the open sewer pipe in the middle of the base? Nathan mentioned it ran out of the base. Was he telling the truth?"

Zara looks taken aback by this, glancing down confusedly at the map.

"Yeah, he's telling the truth, but-"

"And I assume there aren't any guards around there?"

"Well, no. But... How are you going to get in there? There are _hundreds_  of walkers swarming the place."

"We camouflage ourselves"

"You're going to... Camouflage yourself?"

"Yeah. You know, when you slice up a walker and rub its guts all over yourself?" Louis clarifies for her.

Judging by Zaras face, this only confused her(and grossed her out slightly) even more.

"Why the _hell_  would you do that?"

"Wait, do you not know about that trick?" Clementine asks

"...What trick?"

"The walkers can't smell you when you're wearing their guts" AJ tries explaining to Zara

"Sort of similar to how we used to do it, back when I was in the Whisperers" James offered his own experience  
"Only, we used their skin, instead of their insides. The walkers can't tell you're human, see you as one of their own. You're practically invisible."

"If you didn't know about that... Would your dad?"

"He usually tells me everything, especially something that could help in survival. So... I'd say no, he doesn't know."

"This could work to our advantage. If Nathan doesn't know we can walk amongst the walkers, there's no way he'll be expecting us to come through there."

"Sounds like you have a plan" Louis says to Clementine with a smile, seeing the light bulb appear above her head.

"Yeah, I think I do.  
We'll go in at night, when they're at their most vulnerable."Clementine begins describing the plan.  
"Are there many patrols inside the base?"

"Inside? Not really. Especially not in the middle of the night."

"Good. So, we'll split into teams of two. One team will try and sneak in through the gate off to the side, the one me and Louis escaped through. The other team will cover themselves with walkers guts to cover their scent and sneak in through the sewer pipe, through the herd, and then climb up the ladder and into the base."

"The sewer pipe" Zara mumbled under her breath  
"That _damn_ sewer pipe"

"What? What's wrong with it?"

"Everything. Well, nothing wrong with the actual pipe, but...  
My dad has this sort of...Method, of keeping people in line. Sometimes, people wouldnt meet his expectations. He would try what he could to 'correct' them, but... Some kids wouldn't turn into what he wanted them to be.  
So, when he deemed them a lost cause or 'unsalvagable', he would gather everyone in the construction part of the base. He would pick out the person from the crowd, and would list all that was wrong with them. He would announce to the crowd they were 'unsalvagable', and then... Then he would throw them into the pit."

"Jesus..."

"The fall wouldn't even kill them. The walkers would just... Swarm them. There usually wasn't much left, and what is... Joins the rest of them."

" _Fuck_ , how could someone possibly...Okay...Zara, where would your dad be at that time of night?" Clementine asks

"Most of the time he's in his office. If not, there's a small building he uses as, well, his home I suppose. You'll find him in there." Zara explains, pointing out the places on the map.

"Alright... The sewer team will sneak into his office. The other team can search the other building. If you find him... You know what needs to be done..."

"What about the others?" Louis brings up to Clementine

"The others?"

"Well, it's not just Nathan leading, is it? There's Doctor Williams, Nick, Robin, and Nora, the guy she was with-"

"Eli" Zara names him, a conflicted look crossing across her face.  
"He's... He's a good guy..."

"Is he with Nora? Lovers, or-"

"No, just friends. That whole... Raising Ben thing together was-"

"A facade, yeah we got that." Clementine interrupts harshly.  
"Is Nora on our side, or Nathans?"

"Nora... If she's anything, she's loyal. I don't think there would be anyway of persuading her over."

"And Eli? Who's side is he on?"

"I... I don't think he could betray Nora or Nathan-"

"And he knows about whats happening? What Nathan is doing?"

"Yes, but-"

"Then he's not a good guy" Clementine declares with such a tone of finality, the atmosphere in the room turns icy, and Zaras mouth snaps shut.

"I'd they refuse to back down, then... They need to be dealt with" 

"How are we splitting up into teams?" Zara decides to ask instead

"First of all, _you're_  not coming." Clementine asserts, voice dropping dangerously low.

"What?"

"I'm not taking any risks, not with this."

"But I can help-!"

"No. You're staying here." Clememtine interrupts, making it clear her word was final.

"Violet" Clementines calls out to Violet softly, much differently to the harsh tone she had just used with Zara.  
"I hate to ask you this, but... There's no-one else I can ask

A brief expression of confusion passes over Louis' face at this, but he quickly shakes it off

"You want me to watch over her, don't you?" Violet asks miserably.

"I'm sorry. I wish you were with us on this, but-"

"I get it." Violet cuts Clementines apology off.  
"I don't trust myself out there either. Not when I can't shoot for shit and, well... Certainly not in my mindset right now..."

"Vi, I... " Zara tries feebly

"Don't" Violet snaps.  
"Just... Not right now."

Zara deflates, but complies.

"Okay... Ruby, Aasim, Willy and Omar, you guys can sneak through the side gate." Clementine announces, everyone who she had called out nodding along with the plan.  
"AJ, James, Louis and myself will be sneaking through the sewer pipe and-"

"What?" Louis interrupts harshly, everyone startling slightly at the loudness of his voice.  
"You're going with us?!"

"Of course I am" Clementine answers sharply, squinting her eyes at him.

"You can't be serious?!"

"Why wouldn't Clem be going with you?" Violet asks, slightly bewildered by Louis' sudden possessiveness. On instinct, her eyes slide over to Zara, only to see her staring down at the floor. She _knew_ something, but what that was exactly...

"You've got to be kidding me, Clem?" Louis continues  
"This is... I mean, just... No! This is just reckless!"

"I'm going out there, Louis. I'm not sitting this out."

"But you-"

"I'm going. That's _it_ "

"Jesus, Clem! You can't expect me to be okay with you going out there when you're carrying our kid!"

Regret flooded Louis' face the second the words slipped out of his mouth, momentarily forgetting the audience that surrounded them. He was sure his face had turned as pale as Clementines had as soon as he registered what he had said, his mouth opening and closing uselessly like a fish out of water, too nervous to look at the others for their reaction.

While logically he knew the silence in the room probably only lasted for a second or two, it seemed to drag on forever. The nervous anticipation, waiting for what they knew were to be an oncoming barrage of questions.

As it turned out, they were exactly right.

"Did... Did you just say-"

"I'm sorry, she's what now?!"

"You're... You're not joking, are you?"

"You're _what?!_ "

"Fucking what now?"

"Clem? Are you really-"

"ENOUGH!" Clementine raised her voice once more to be heard over the yells and questions of the others.  
"This... Isn't exactly the way I wanted to tell you guys. In fact, I wasn't entirely ready to tell you at _all_ , yet. But, now that's all thrown out the window-"

Clementine paused briefly to give Louis a quick side glare before continuing.

"-We don't have much of a choice. So yes. Yes, it's true."

"You're... You're pregnant?" AJ asks shyly, eyes fixated to Clementines stomach, as if magically expecting a bump to appear out of nowhere.

"Yeah. She is. We're... We're gonna have a kid of our own." Louis answers, the briefest of smiles appearing on his face.

"Dude, first of all? Kind of a big fuck up there" Aasim directs towards Louis, getting a slap to the back of his head from Ruby.  
"Ow! I hadn't finished! I was _going_  to say that... Well... Holy shit! I mean, it's still awesome! And I guess I'm trying to say congrats to you both."

"Gosh, a baby... I hope we have what we need to take care of the little guy..." Ruby trails off, nursing instincts already kicking in.

"Uh, actually, it's going to be a little girl" Louis corrects confidently.

"Wait, how do you know?" AJ asks Louis, trying to figure out how Louis could know already.

"He doesn't. He just likes contradicting me" Clementine replies with a fake glare towards Louis.

"Nah, I think Louis is right" Violet adds in, the good (albeit shocking) news helping to give her a reason to smile again.  
"I say you're gonna have a girl too"

"What? No way, it's _definitely_  going to be a boy" Willy puts forward.

"Yep. Definitely another Louis" Omar adds.

"I have absolutely no idea, but if we're guessing, I'd say a girl too" James says

"As fun as it is to hear you guys randomly betting on my babys gender-" Clementine interrupts them all, everyone's guesses coming to a screeching halt.  
"We were kind of the in the middle of something else"

"Right..."

"Yeah, sorry..."

"Louis, I know you don't want me to go. I get that, but you have to understand there's _no_ way that's happening. You want me to stay back for the sake of our child, but I'm doing this _for_ our child. We can't peacefully let our kid grow up in a world where we know Nathan is still out there, and that we did nothing about it? To leave him to kidnap more children for his sick program? What if that had happened to _us?_  What if it had happened to AJ or if was _our_  baby he had taken? "

"Alright, alright, I just..." Louis trailed off, sighing in defeat  
" _Please_  be careful out there. I don't want to lose you. Either of you."

"Don't worry" Clementine assures him with a soft smile.  
"We're part of Team Fun, remember? I know you'll always have my back out there, no matter what"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Do you think Violet will be alright?" Louis asks Clementine as they walk along the tree line by the side of the road, slowly making the long trek back towards Nathan's base, not wanting to use the car in case it gave away their position.

"I hope so" Clementine wished  
"It's a shitty situation all around. It's an 'all hands on deck' kind of thing, but... For all we know, this could be all one big plan on Nathans part, and I couldn't justify bringing Zara with us. Someone was going to have to keep an eye on her back home..."

"And that someone was Violet..." Louis mutters

"We didn't exactly have much of a choice. Like I said, we need everyone we can. Violet was the only option."

"This is all such a mess... Its..."

"Yeah. I know."

"Good thing we're used to that, right?"

Clementine didn't know how to respond to that.

She glances over her shoulder as she walks, checking up on AJ and James behind her. She can see James speaking softly to AJ about something, but can't quite make out what it is. AJ has his eyes down on the rifle in his hands, grip tight with his finger hovering over the trigger.

Even after so many years, it pains her to see him like this. Just like the kids in Nathans care, she had raised her own little soldier. While by drastically different methods, the end result still remained the same.

It pained her even more to think that, in the off chance they actually survive this, she'll probably have to raise her own child the same way.

No. Not the same way. It was completely different circumstances with AJ. If, no, _when_  they get out of this, they won't be back on the road, hoping to scrounge up a meal every few days. Now, they had a _home_ , her child would have a _father_ , and their child would have a big family to look after them. This would be different.

She was going to make sure of that.

"Hey" A gentle voice comes from her side, along with a hand placed on her shoulder. She glances over to see James had caught up to them, dropping his hand away once he sees her turn in his direction.

"You okay?" James asks her, cocking his head slightly as he asks.

"I feel like I should be asking you that" Clementine replies.  
"All of this kinda came out of nowhere, it feels like, and now here we are again, off on another attack. And I know you're not one for violence-"

"When you can avoid it" James interrupts her.  
"The fact that we're on our way to a place, with the sole intention of ending lives.. It's a horrid thought. But I can see why you believe its necessary. Especially after hearing what he's done..."

"I wish it wasn't like this" Clementine tells him.  
"But if you had heard the things we heard. Nathan has no regard for human life. Only what he can get out of a person. If he believes you're of no use to him, well... If we don't kill him, then he'll kill us."

"You once said 'it's not kill or be killed'" James recalls their conversation in the cave, getting a faraway look in his eyes as he recalls the memory.  
"When did that change?"

"It never did. I meant that across all people. Nathan, well... I never imagined _he_  would be an exception"

"It never gets any easier..."

"No. It doesn't. But what choice do we have?"

James nods solemnly, a small smile appearing on his face as he thinks.

"AJ is already prepared for his big brother role" James tells her  
"He's taking it _very_  seriously"

"I'm just glad he took the news well. He took it a lot better than I did, that's for sure..."

"Well, that's a bit different" James comforts her  
"There's kind of a difference between being a mother and a sibling."

"Yeah, I kinda get that already James"

"Right, but... Well, I'm just trying to say it's okay for you to be nervous about this. You can let yourself feel like that, it's only natural."

"I can't really think about it right now. Now when we've got all this on our plates. And Louis, he..."

Clementine trails off with an irritated sigh, raising a hand to rub at her head.

"He's... He means well. But he's so damn _paranoid_  that somethings going to happen. I mean, don't get me wrong, _I'm_  shit scared that something could happen, especially with _what_  we're about to do. But now, it's like... It's like he's watching my every step. _Literally_ , almost as if he's worried I'm going to trip over a stick on the ground or something"

"I assume you've talked to him about it?"

"Not really" Clementine confesses.  
"I mean, you all heard his little outburst back at the school. And besides, it's not exactly like we've had much time to talk about it. Before the meeting we had, Louis had just sort of ' _assumed_ ' I wouldn't be going."

"It was definitely something seeing such a laid back guy kick up such a fuss. But... It's only because he cares. You do have to remember it's his child as much as it's yours."

"I know he is. Trust me, I know. But I'm not suddenly this ' _fragile thing_ ' just because I'm pregnant".

"Of course you're not. But it raises the stakes so much more. I'm sure there was a time that, the worst thing Louis could have imagined was losing you or AJ. Now, if something happened to you, it's not _just_  you who could be killed. You have another life inside of you, and he has absolutely no control over that, no way of protecting them, other than protecting _you._  
He's scared. He could lose _everything_ in one go. Honestly, I'm surprised he caved in as quick as he did. But I know that's _only_ because he trusts you as much as he does."

Clementine glances over her shoulder once more, to where Louis had slowed down slightly to take James' place at AJ's side. Like with James, they were speaking softly and quietly, but Clementine could see Louis glancing up at her every few seconds, always keeping a watchful eye out for her, no matter what.

"I wish I _could_  do what he wants" Clementine tells James as she looks back forward again.  
"To not have to worry about all of this. To be safe at home, not having to worry about the safety of my unborn child, of AJ, of Louis, of all of you, I-"

"That's what we're doing right now, isn't it? To make sure that you _get_  that. God knows you deserve that."

"Everyone deserves it. It just seems like... You can never have it forever. There's always _something_. Something ready to throw a wrench into everything."

"So we'll keep fighting. We'll keep fighting until we can't anymore. We fight, so that the ones after us don't have to. So our _children_  don't have to. Because that's what's its all about, in the end. We're fighting not just for our future, but for theirs.  
To make sure they don't have to suffer as we did."

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The tension in the room is palpable, but neither of them are mentioning it. The silence that surrounds them feels suffocating, but the only alternative was talking, and that was the last thing Violet wanted right now. To hear more lies spill from Zaras lips. Or perhaps, the truth.

She wasn't sure which would be worse.

Even though Violets eyes are focused down on the ground in front of the beat-up sofa she's sat upon, vision mostly unfocused where she's lost in her own thoughts, she can still feel Zaras eyes trained on her from across the room. She even sees a few twitched movements from Zara out of the corner of her eye every now and then, desperate to get closer to her, but smart enough to know that wasn't a good idea in the slightest.

Every now and then, her brain focuses on the feeling of the gun in her hand. It alternated between a tight grip, and barely keeping the gun in her hand. Every time her hand brushed against the cool metal of the barrel, Clementines departing words would echo in her head.

As they had stood crowded around the weapons locker they had, passing out various rifles and pistols to everyone in the group, Clementine had pulled her aside and slipped a pistol into her hand. At Violets confused look, she glanced sadly over at Zara stood off to the side, a pitied look on her face as she waited for Violet to connect the dots.

"If you have to use it... Use it."

Even after everything that happened, she still didn't want Zara dead. And she certainly didn't want to be the one to pull the trigger. But, if worse came to worse, and she had to do it?

She would. It would hurt. More than that, it would crush the last little bit of hope in this shitty world she had left. Her one lifeline, the person who had been keeping her sane these past few years, kept her afloat through it all.

Except, that wasn't entirely true. She had everyone else. Those that always had her back, even when she couldn't see it. She knew that, after all of this was done, they'd support her through this too.

And after hearing about Louis' and Clems baby on the way... That had sparked something in her she couldn't name. Something about the fact that this new life would be joining them soon, in a time where the dead outnumber the living, gave her another reason to keep fighting.

"I can't do this" Zara suddenly declared, standing abruptly from her own chair and storming towards the door, swinging it open and charging out.

It took Violets shocked mind a few seconds to realise she should be chasing after her. In no way had she expected for Zara to just... Up and walk out of the room.

"Hey!" Violet yelled after her as she enters the hallway, seeing Zara slip into the room the others had collected the weapons from. Her heart drops slightly in her chest at this realisation, and she hurries her pace to catch up to her. Never before had the thought of Zara with a weapon made her nervous, but now? She didn't know whether Zara would turn around and shoot her without a second thought.

"Zara!" Violet yelled her name once in the room, the skin around her knuckles white from the force she was gripping the pistol with.  
"The _fuck_  are you doing?"

It wasn't the anger nor the shock in Violets voice that got Zara to stop. It was the underlying tone of fear that Violet did such a good job at hiding, but no one knew how to pick that up better than the person she now feared.

"I'm sorry, Vi. But I can't do this."

"Cant do _w_ _hat?_ "

"Sit around here and do _nothing"_

"Well, tough shit" Violet spat in response  
"You don't have much of a choice"

"Vi, c'mon-"

"No, you don't get to do that. You don't get to say my name, put on the begging tone, and think you can sway me. It's not going to go down like that"

"You know what? No. No, I'm not going to sit here and listen to you blame me."

"I'm sorry, the _fuck_  did you just say?"

"They're out there. _All_  of them. Tell me, who is it that's been working behind the scenes for the last five fucking years, huh? Who knows the layout to that entire base like the back of their hand? Who knows each and every person in that base, who's the fucking _daughter_  of their leader? Don't you think that, I don't know, that might be an advantage?  
They're going to die out there. You know it, I know it, and I'm sure as shit not going to sit here like a prisoner and let it fucking happen. I can _help_ "

Without waiting for Violets response, Zara rushes over to the weapons storage and pulls out a rifle and a pistol, quickly slinging the rifle across her back before grabbing a few magazines filled with ammo.

It's as she turns around, shoving a magazine into the pistol that she freezes. Violet was in front of her, as she had been before, but this time the pistol she was holding was now aimed at _her_.

Zara almost wanted to laugh. It was ridiculous, after all. Ridiculous that Violet was considering pulling the trigger on her. She didn't laugh, though. Not when there's no tremble to Violets hands. Not when there's no sign of hesitancy on her face.

"Vi?" She says her name cautiously as if saying her name any louder would get her to pull the trigger.  
"What are you doing?"

"Stopping you from leaving" Violet states matter factually, cocking the hammer of the pistol with her thumb.  
"No matter what"

"You're serious?" Zara asks, eyes darting from Violets face to the barrel of the gun aimed squarely at her head.  
"You want me not to help _that_  bad?"

"No, I want you to do as you've been ordered. As I' _m_ ordering. You have no right to decide what you can do anymore. I'm _not_ letting you fuck things up"

"Fuck things up? I might be the only thing that'll keep them all alive!"

"Or you could do the opposite. For all I know, you're gearing up to chase them down and slaughter them before they can get to your dad. And there's no way in hell I'm letting that happen"

"You can't do this. Vi, you're not going to shoot me for-"

She nearly jumps out of her skin at the sound of the gunshot, eyes widened in complete shock as she looks down at the hole the bullet had made in the floor between her feet.

Violet had actually done it. She had shot.

But she hadn't missed. No, she hit exactly where she wanted to. And that seemed to shock her even more than the fact that Violet had shot at all.

"You... You're good....You're good at shooting? But, during practice, you were-"

"Shit?"

"No, not shit. I didn't say that. But... its not like you were ever all that accurate..."

"I can't shoot for shit long distance. My eyes, just... Don't let me do that. Short distance, though? I get by"

"Then... Why? Why did you always insist you can't do it? That you can't do anything?"

"It doesn't stop me from being a risk" Violet whispers in answer.  
"You're not the only one that could fuck things up. If I went with them, then... People would get killed. I'm not letting my problems make even more problems."

"You're more than that, Vi. You know that. You're capable of so much more."

"No, I'm not. It's just not worth it."

"Don't say that. You're _strong_ , Violet. And we're even stronger together. You can't deny that."

"Things are different now. It won't ever be the same. _We_  won't ever be the same."

"I know. I knew that, when I fell in love with you. I knew that, someday, this day would come. And I still let myself fall. Because my God, _you_  are worth it."

"What are you trying to do, Zara? What point are you trying to make?"

"Let me save them. Let me bring my dad down. Let me show you how much everyone means to me. How much this _family_ means to me. Let me leave, let me go down to that base.  
And come with me"

"Come with you?"

"I need you by my side on this one, Vi. I will _always_  have your back, no matter what. Please, have my back on this one. _Help_  me save them all."

"Why do you have to do this to me?" Violet asked, voice breaking from the lump that had formed in her throat.  
"Don't you think I want nothing more to believe you? Even when my brain is screaming at me that this is all part of the same trick. All another one of your acts. I don't know if you're still trying to keep your dad alive."

"My dad died a long time ago." Zara whispered shakily  
"The real him, anyway. The man in his place is barely a man. His blood may run through my veins, but that is the only thing we have in common.  
I'm fact, there's a saying he used to say to me before. When I was scared of all the new people joining our grip. He would tell me that they were our family now. He told me that family didn't end in blood, rather, it was what you made it.  
I'm sure he didn't expect for me to use that against him. But I took those words to heart. He isn't my dad anymore. He isn't my family. I'm heading out there to save my _real_  family. Question is, are you going to join me?"

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A lone walker ambled along the road, broken foot dragging uselessly against the asphalt as it shambled towards nowhere. The glow of the moon reflected off the bloody intestines that had been caught up around its own waist, ripped out by the very creature he now was.

A single, high pitched whistle stops the walkers in its tracks. It stumbles to a stop, brittle bones cracking as it turns towards the woods, its tilted head giving it almost a human-like personality, as if it was listening out for the sound. It moves hungrily towards where it had heard the sound, a low groan escaping its blood-filled throat as it reaches the tree line of the woods, as if it was trying to take its prey by surprise.

In reality, it's the opposite way around. The creature has no time to react before the nail embedded bat swung against its head, cracking its skull to pieces. Just like that, it was lights out for the walker as it collapsed down onto the floor in a heap by its assailants feet.

"Good job" Clementine whispers to Louis as she exits out of the cover of surrounding shrubs, shortly followed by AJ and James.

"You sure we're close to the base?" AJ asks, looking worriedly around at their surroundings.

"Yeah. Twenty minutes top, if I were to guess" Louis answers.

"Okay. Let's get this started..." Clementine mumbles, pulling out a knife and sawing down the walkers stomach, pushing apart the skin and muscle to get to its insides.

Louis can't stop his face from twisting in disgust at the sight, his queasiness made all the more worse once the smell of rot reaches him.

"God...I forgot the smell... How did I forget the smell?"

"It's not all that different from how they usually smell" Clementine replies

"Oh yeah, definitely not all that different. You know, it's just multiplied by like, a hundred times, no biggie" Louis says with as much sarcasm as he can muster.  
"You said you've done this quite a few times, right?"

"Yep"

"And do you ever, y'know, get used to it at all-"

"Nope. Not in the slightest" Clementine says honestly, digging her hands into the corpses abdomen to pull out a fresh section of intestines, severing a part with her knife and raising it up to him.

"God, I hope we don't have to do this often..."

After making sure they were all well covered with guts and walker blood (except for James, with his walker mask and skin gloves, the lucky-) and a few close calls of gagging and retching (Louis will admit that was all him), they were finally ready to walk amongst the walkers once more.

"I hope the others snuck in okay" Louis whispers to Clementine as they draw closer to the sewer entrance.

"Best not to dwell on it right now. If we worry too much, we'll never get this done..."

"Yeah I know, I know. But... They've never _killed_  anyone. I already know how much your first sucks, and... I'm worried they'll freeze up like I did."

"It could happen. But at the end of the day, you did it, right?"

"I... I guess..."

"Then there's not much we can do but hope that they'll do the same. And I believe they will. They have it in them."

"Yeah. Yeah, of course they do. I'm sorry, I'm just..."

"Feeling a little anxious?" Clementine guesses with a small, knowing smile.  
"I didn't notice..."

"Yeah... I'm sorry. I get that it can be a bit too much at times."

"You don't have to apologise, Lou."

"Good. Because you should know I'm not going to stop."

The certainty in his tone made her chuckle lightly, and he flashes a brilliant smile at her in return.

"At least tell me you'll calm down a bit once our child is born, right?"

"I mean, sure. But then you'll have to listen to our daughter constantly complaining about how I'm watching her every move."

" _Or_  our son."

"Stop trying to fool yourself, Clem. Just accept we're having a girl."

"Nope"

"Why? Just to spite me?"

"Of course it's not to spite you-"

"Because I have to say, that's _very_  childish of you, Clem"

"It's _not_ to spite you! I'm just saying that, as _his_  mother, I feel like we're having a boy!"

"And _I'm_  just saying that I can't wait until the day I get to tell our beautiful daughter the one, and _only_  time, that her mother was wrong"

Clementines retort is cut off before it can even begin by a low groan. At once, all four of them are on high alert, heads whipping to the source of the sound. Immediately, they see a small group of walkers, not big enough to be a herd, but large enough to be a threat, collected around a large pipe, pacing back and forth in front of its entrance, a few squeezing through and making their way down the pipe. Even from here, they could hear the collected groans of the huge herd they knew were grouped together at the end of the pipe, within Nathan's base.

"This is it." Clementine whispers to them, her nerves beginning to kick in now they were so close.  
"Alright, just remember to stay quiet, and move slowly. Do that, and we'll be fine. We'll be okay."

Even though Clementines knows this is something James doesn't need to hear, having lived a large portion of his life _with_ the walkers, he still nodded shakily at her, and it struck her that he was as nervous about this as the rest of them. Cool, calm and collected James, able to face a herd of walkers without so much as a flinch, was _scared_. Not of the walkers, no, that would be a breeze for him.

He wasn't scared of losing his life either. No, that was something you had to come to terms with early on once the apocalypse started, otherwise you would lose your mind, trying desperately to keep yourself out of danger in a world that wanted you dead with every turn.

Back then, the only thing he was at risk of losing was Charlie. Now, he has people he loves. And there's _nothing_ he can do to keep them safe. It's out of his power. This night, he could lose _everything_. And there's, not a damn thing he can do about it.

That's what scared him.

The walkers barely acknowledged them as they approached. They gave a quick glance in their direction upon hearing their footsteps, but once they got a whiff of the rotting guts hanging off of them, they returned to their idle state, shuffling around on the spot, waiting for something with fresh meat for them to sink their decaying teeth into.

The entrance to the sewer pipe is a tight fit, only able to fit one at a time. There's no discussion, James just instinctively takes the lead, squeezing himself through and shuffling down the pipe. AJ follows him, not as tight as a fit for him as it was for the others.

It's not too much of a surprise that Louis shakes his head when Clementine gestures for him to follow. Of course, being at the back would simply be too risky in his mind. She knows nows not the best time to argue about it, so she relents and begins to push her way through the entrance to the sewer, waiting until Louis is right behind her before she carries on.

Every clang of the rifles strung across their backs catching the wall of the pipe makes them wince, waiting for the telltale sound of the walkers excited groans, to see them pour through and chase them down. Luckily, they didn't seem to have heard, and they're free to continue down the pipe.

Clementine isn't claustrophobic by any means, but something about this place made her feel short of breath. Maybe it was the rotting stench that surrounded them, or the press of the grimy wall, enclosing her from every side. Or simply it was her body wanting to give in to the panic of what it was they were about to do, already feeling the need to protect the life that was growing inside of her.

She snaps out of it when she feels the warmth of a hand enveloping her own. She hasn't realised she had come to a stop until Louis's hand was grasping her own, and despite the worry she can see shining his eyes, he still had that same, comforting smile as always.

With a thankful nod, she wills her legs to keep moving, hurrying to catch up to AJ and James, who had stopped a little bit ahead, having noticed that she had stopped following.

Thankfully, the pipe slowly begins to open up, providing them with just a bit more room. It seems to make it just a bit easier to breathe, but doesn't do much to dispel the tightness she felt around her chest. It seemed panic wasn't ready to release its grip of her just yet, but it didn't matter. She had fought through such panic before, and she could do it again.

She _had_  to.

She couldn't tell how long they had been down there, pushing their way towards the pinprick of light in the distance they knew to be the exit of the sewer pipe. There was a sort of relief in reaching the end, knowing they would soon be out of there. It was a relief that was short-lived, however

It was odd, how you can never just 'turn off' your instincts. She had seen walkers millions of times by now, was all too familiar with their rotting smell and never-ending groans. And yet, as they stood on the edge of the giant pit in the middle of Nathan's base, the second her eyes glance over the hundreds upon hundreds packed together within the hole, her instincts are _screaming_  at her to run, to get as far away as possible.

Once again, James is the one to take the lead. With one last glance at them over his shoulder, he slips into the herd with practised ease, blending into the group of the dead and practically disappearing amongst them all. With an encouraging nod, AJ follows after him, and no matter how confident she is with his survival capabilities, she always worries on times like these that it might be last time she sees him.

The walkers are packed together almost too tightly. There's nothing Clementine can do to relax her muscles as she pushed apart the mass of bodies with her own body. Even though she had seen walkers be rough with their own kind before, it felt like simply touching them would alert them all to what she really was, and they would swarm her in an instant. They don't seem to notice her in the slightest though, simply stumbling in the direction she pushes them in.

That's when the worst thing possible happens. A loud boom from up ahead has heart racing in her chest. It wasn't an explosion or a gunshot. Somehow, it was even worse.

It was thunder.

Seconds after the revelation, she feels a small wet drop land on her face. Her stomach drops the same time she feels the next patter. And the next. And the next. Until slowly, the heavens open up above them, dumping gallons upon gallons of water down onto them.

But she could see the ladder. The only way out of there, just up ahead. If she squinted hard enough, she could make out James a bit further ahead, so _close_  to the ladder. They could do it, they could get there, she just had to pray that-

"Clem" Louis' quiet, yet panicked and urgent voice whispered in her ear be from behind her.  
"Clem, they know. They _know_ "

Slowly, _slowly,_  the walkers closest had turned their head towards them. It felt like a standoff, waiting for who would move first. The walkers were doing nothing but _staring_ , as if they still couldn't decide whether the creatures stood in front of them were a meal or not.

Clementine wasn't going to wait around until they decided.

"We have to move. Go. Go!"

Stealth was no longer an option. The only way they would survive this if they _moved_. If they got to that ladder in time and got the hell out of there.

The guts draped around their shoulders fell to the floor with a wet thud, the grey concrete of the ground stained red as the blood was washed off them by the rain. Clementine could no longer hear the groans of the walkers around them, only her own frantic breathing as she _pushed_  and shoved her way through, her heartbeat increasingly impossibly fast the closer she gets to the ladder.

To her immense relief, James and AJ had already made it. She comes to a slight stop once she reaches the ladder, whirling around to find Louis within the walkers. Only, he was right behind her, pushing her impatiently towards the ladder with a panicked expression.

"Go! Move!"

Clementine hauls herself up the ladder, racing up as far as she dares before glancing back down to find Louis once more. He had just begun climbing the ladder, mere feet away from her, when it happens.

He hadn't got his leg out of the way in time. Just as he went to move to the next rung of the ladder, the flailing hand of the walker catches his leg. Realising it had something, the walkers grabbed and _yanked_ , and Louis slipped a few rungs down.

Part of her wanted to scream or to shout, but that would do nothing but attract unwanted attention. Louis was hopelessly kicking at the walker with his free leg, but the damn thing was determined. Determined to get his chomping jaws closer to the flesh it held in its decaying hands.

Clementines hands fumble for the knife in her pocket, yanking it out as quick as she can, not wanting to take her eyes off Louis for more than a second.

"Louis!" She hisses for his attention, and to her relief, he hears it and glances up at her. She drops the knife, and thank God, he catches it.

Just as the walker is about to sink its teeth into his leg, Louis sinks the knife into its skull. The chattering of its teeth stop, the grip on his leg loosens, and the walker drops down to the floor.

Louis wasn't going to wait around for the next one to grab him. With a few panicked breaths he commences climbing again, and all four scramble to the top.

AJ and James practically crawl from the ladder onto the floor of the base, scrambling to their feet and offering a hand to haul Clementine up and over the ladder. Once standing, she spins around and hurries to the edge of the pit, barely giving Louis time to poke his head over the edge before grabbing hold of his hand and hoisting him up, not letting go for a second as she pulls him into him with shaking breaths.

" _Fuck_ , _fuck._  You... I thought for certain you-"

"It's okay, Clem. I'm fine, I'm okay."

"You're not... Are you bit?"

"No. No, it didn't get me" Louis assures her, pushing away from their hug to grab her knife from his pocket, holding its handle out to her.  
"If... If you hadn't thought on your toes, I..."

"Let's... Not think about that"

"Probably for the best."

"That...didnt go all that smoothly" James interjected, pulling the mask off his face with shaking hands.  
"I suppose I should be glad that the scent of this mask doesn't just... Wash off."

"Yeah...Maybe we should make some more" AJ mused  
"If we have to do something like this again".

"No way in hell we're doing _this_  again" Louis muttered.  
"I don't think this could get any worse-"

For a second, they almost thought the sudden bright light that blinded them was one of the flashes of lightning from overhead. Except, it didn't go away.

Once their eyes adjusted from the pitch blackness to the blinding light, they realised it was from a few spotlights that were trained on them, the hum of nearby generators powering the lights. Said lights revealed the construction area of the base. The construction equipment and blocks of cement were still spread about, and immediately, Clementines strategic mind was figuring out the way the best way to use them as cover.

She couldn't focus on that right now, though. As there, right in front of them, was Nathan. Not just Nathan. It was _everyone_. Him, Nora, Robin, Nick, Eli and Doctors Williams by his side. And behind them was, well, his army. Every single one of them, rifles in hands, staring blankly ahead at them. Worst of all, sat on their knees in front of them all, was Aasim, Ruby, Omar and Willy. It was clear from the bruises and cuts that littered their face that their attempt at sneaking in had gone as poorly as their own.

"Couldn't get any worse?" Nathan asks them in a mocking tone, shaking his head sadly  
"Clearly, you haven't been paying attention to this story."


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...few things to talk about...
> 
> First of all, I'm really really sorry about how long its taken to update. Let me tell you, I paled quite a bit when I saw I last updated 17th October. Just...yikes...
> 
> I am sorry, but I have been VERY busy. Work has been super hectic, and still IS super hectic right how. And for the foreseeable future. A lot of stuff that, to be honest, I don't have time to get into right now, but the just of it is the company is basically changing hands so everything is all sort of up and changing right now, and the work load is going up.
> 
> AND, since the work load is going up, and since we're not meeting the goals they want, they wanted to send a few people over to their place in America to see how they do it. I was one of those people, and so have been away from home in another country for two weeks, with absolutely no time for any writing. The lead up to it, actually being there, and then the hectic rush of work once I came back...
> 
> To put it simply, I'm exhausted. Physically and mentally, and I just did not have the will to write, no matter how much I wanted to finish this story. 
> 
> Which I WILL. I promise to every God there might be, I will finish this damn fic, not when it's so close to wrapping up anyway. 
> 
> Phew. Sorry for the ramble...
> 
> Anyway, that leads onto my next point... 
> 
> I feel like shit for waiting so long to put up a next chapter... And then putting up a chapter that is shorter than usual. 
> 
> Again, sorry... 
> 
> BUT... I wanted to 'get the ball rolling again' so to speak. Wanted to get something written down, continue the story, get it out here to you guys, in the hopes to get the writing spirit alive and well again inside.
> 
> Which, I can confidently say, it has. 
> 
> Another but though... I can't promise I'll be able to update as I did. 
> 
> Again, feel awful, but life is just sort of getting in the way right now. Work, Christmas, the whole chaos that life is... Sometimes writing just doesn't fit into that timeline. 
> 
> But I will try. With every fibre of my being, I will write, I will finish this story, I will get it out to you. I can't say it'll happen fast, but eventually, it will.

"Shit..."

The despair in the single word Clementine had uttered under her breath chilled Louis as much as the rain that was soaking him to the bone. It wasn't a frustrated sound, nor an angry one. It was a tone that held one clear meaning;

' _We're fucked'_

He had kind of expected for Nathan to start mocking them, or to smirk at them in that typical villain way he saw in all those superhero movies he watched as a kid. At the moment, he wasn't really doing... Anything. If Louis were to guess, the most he could see from him was exasperation.

That and perhaps, some disappointment.

"I had hoped it wouldn't come to this"  
Nathan strains his voice to be heard over the rain.  
"I wanted this to end on better terms"

"Better for you, maybe" Clementine snaps, her hand slowly inching towards the gun in her back pocket  
"Not for us. Your vision for the future isn't one we wanted to be a part of"

"Such a selfish choice..." Nathan utters  
"I gave you a better choice. One to ensure the future of all of us. Of yourself, and your children before you. You've let your own selfish morals get in the way of that"

"A choice? You didn't give us a choice! _'Join us or die'_ isn't much of a choice!" Louis retaliates

"The 'or' is there, is it not? It's not my fault you chose the wrong option. Surely it's better to choose the option where you live, above all else?"

"And who says we're going to die here?"

This time, Nathan does smile. It's not happiest in the slightest.

"Probability does, I'm afraid"

Clementine bites on her tongue to keep herself from blurting the words she so what's to say in response to that- ' _I wouldn't be so sure'_

She doesn't, though. If they play their cards right, they could have the element of surprise on their hands. Seeing just how confident Nathan was in his own men, she was sure nothing would surprise Nathan more than for half of his people to suddenly turn against him.

Question is; Was Zara telling the truth? Even if half of Nathans men were on their side, what would it take for them to defect? What kind of signal could they give to kick this off?

"Now, your friends here..." Nathan begins, turning his body slightly to glance at the others, who had been forced to their knees with guns to their heads.  
"They were easy enough to capture. Put up a hell of a fight, I'll give them that. You trained them well--but not good enough. After your escape, I knew you would be heading back here. It made the most sense, of course. You knew we would wipe you out no problem if we attacked. So you strike first. Simple enough. Unfortunately for your people, I had pulled all men available into guard duty."

"Go fuck yourself" Aasim grits through his teeth, receiving a sharp blow to the head from the butt of the gun that was aimed at him for his comment.

"Don't-" Nathan barks out his order, turning to address the soldier that had struck Aasim  
"There's no need for that. We're not like that. They're already beaten. Stand down."

Aasim pushed himself back up with wobbly arms, glaring ungratefully up at Nathan once sitting back up.

"You haven't beaten us yet."

Nathan raises an eyebrow at Aasims defiance, eyes flicking over to the others in his captivity before turning back to Clementine.

"Now, you though...You weren't with them. I'll confess, I never would have thought you would be dumb enough to try and fight your way through those walkers, just to get to _me._ That was of course until I had the pleasure of meeting your friend there"

Nathan raises an arm to gesture at James, who immediately tenses up once he realises that he was who Nathan was referring to.

"What do you mean?" James asks cautiously

"I knew of your people's methods. Of the things you would do to walk among these monsters" Nathan explains, pointing to the mask scrunched in James' hands.  
"I realised that there could always be a possibility you would find a way to sneak them in. Yet...Here you are, having made your way through the walkers, but with no masks of your own. How in the hell did you manage that?"

Clementine glances over to Louis, whose look conveys the exact same thing she's thinking right now;

_Why hasn't he killed us already? Why is this being dragged out as much as it is?_

"Does it really matter?" Louis asks  
"Do you really need to know?"

"No..." Nathan answers with a heavy sigh.  
"No, I suppose I don't. There is, however, one thing I _do_  need to know"

"And what's that?" AJ asks

"I'd like to know what the hell you've done with my daughter" Nathan curtly replies, eyes sliding over each and every one of them  
"I knew you took her. During that little escape of yours."

It takes all of her willpower not to react to this. Clementine had assumed Nathan would have figured out that his daughter had been working behind the scenes all these years. Apparently, he had been, and still was, as clueless about it as they had been about her.

Every piece of her wants to say that she's dead. That small inkling inside of her, that need to protect everyone, despite knowing what Zara had done. Surely Zara would be safest, if assumed dead, in the case that Nathan does figure out where her true loyalties (hopefully) lie.

That's not the only reason she wants to say Zaras dead. Some odd, almost twisted part of her wants to hurt Nathan in that way. To get some kind of satisfaction out of knowing she was able to cause such suffering, even with a complete lie.

But then perhaps... Perhaps this could be played to their advantage... Nathan wouldn't be asking for Zara if he didn't care about her safety. If they used Zara as a bargaining chip, then maybe... Maybe they could get out of this alive.

"She's alive" Clementine tells Nathan  
"For now"

She sees Louis glance at her curiously from the corner of her eyes. Not wanting to alert Nathan, she gives a quick glance in his direction, pleading with her eyes for him to catch on and play along. She can only hope the message came across...

"For now?" Nathan repeats, narrowing his eyes at the choice of words  
"What exactly are you expecting to happen here? That you'll miraculously escape my clutches, head back to that school of yours and kill my daughter before I get there myself? I mean, you're all here, so I don't see-"

Nathan stops in his sentence, pausing for a moment to think before letting out a low chuckle and shaking his head.

"Ah, but we're missing one, aren't we? The one without her eyes? Well, no matter. If she's the only one you've left behind, it'll be easy enough to storm your gates and get my daughter back"

"She's more than just 'the one without her eyes'" Louis spits

"Oh? Do tell?"

"For one she's smart as hell" Louis continues  
"You don't think she'll realise something has gone wrong? That we had a backup plan?"

"And what exactly is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that Zara will already be dead by the time you show up"

That does it. The slightest dark shift across Nathan's face, an obvious struggle to keep his emotions at bay. His gaze, that had been settled on Clementine, slowly drifted over to lock onto Louis. It remains there for a few agonising seconds before he gives a barely-there nod of his head, a nod which he repeats as he lifts a hand to wipe down his face, brushing away the rain that had settled into his face.

"If you think for a second-"

Nathan doesn't get to finish his sentence, as he's interrupted by panicked and confused muttering coming from within the crowd behind him. Guns are being lifted into the air by the soldiers that held them, unsure as to where they're supposed to be pointing, or even if they're _supposed_  to be aiming.

Finally, the source of the ruckus appears. Doctor Williams pushes himself through the crowd, pushing along an unwilling and seriously pissed off Nora in front of him, holding a knife against her throat as an incentive as they move forward.

"Matt?" Nathan asks, the most confused and dumbstruck they had ever heard him.  
"What are you-"

"Bringing this to an end" Doctor Williams answers before he can finish  
"This- _Nightmare._ Years upon years of endless torture. It has to _stop"_

"Get the fuck off me!" Nora whispers in demand, pulling harshly against the arm that held her in place.

"Matt... Why? Why are you doing this? All those years, we-"

"Yes. Years and years I've known you, Nate. And that's precisely why this hurts as much as it does. I promised myself I would be by your side, through hell and back. This? This is worse than hell"

"Matt, Just--Just let Nora go. We don't need this unnecessary bloodshed."

"That's why I have to do this, Nate. To _stop_ all this bloodshed. You gave these kids a choice. I'm giving you the same one now; Give this up.  
This life you're so set on, a life where you choose the fate of others. It needs to stop. So many lives can be saved tonight, yourself included. You just have to _stop"_

"You know me, Matt. You know me, so you know exactly why I can't do that." Nathan answers sadly.  
"Sometimes, blood has to be shed, in order to prevent even more from being spilt. I just never thought you would be part of it."

"So this is it?" Doctor Williams asks  
"You refuse?"

"Yes. I refuse."

"So be it"

With that, they see a large collection of guns within the group of soldiers slowly turn to point at one another, instead of in their direction. Those pointing their guns at Doctor Williams now flick wildly between him, them, and their own people, their usual masks of indifference cracking, giving away to utter confusion.

Ever so slowly, a large group of Nathan's men begin to back away, separating from the group. Nathan only has a split second to be completely bewildered at the turn of events before three soldiers from the separated group step forward, grabbing Nick, Robin and Eli. Before any of them can get a word of surprise out, the soldiers had run a knife across their throats, shoving their bleeding bodies to the ground and leaving them to grasp at their own throats amongst the muddy ground, the clear puddles collected on the floor quickly becoming stained a deep red.

"I'm sorry" Doctor Williams whispers into Nora's ear before slicing his knife across her throat, giving her the same treatment as the others.

"No!" Nathan yells, already reaching for the gun in his pocket. At the slight movement, Clementine begins to draw her own gun, with Louis, AJ and James following suit, removing their own weapons in preparation.

A group of Nathan's men had already swarmed around Nathan, providing a protective bubble to keep him from harms way. Nathan was now hidden amongst the sea of soldiers, out of sight and most definitely out of shooting range. That is, without harming others.

"What did you think would come of this?!" Comes Nathans yell from somewhere within the crowd.  
"You want bloodshed?! Then you'll get bloodshed!"

His words barely have time to echo across the construction yard before all hell breaks loose.

It was almost deafening, the onslaught of bullets flying through the air, countless gunshots echoing all around them, a symphony of automatic weapons firing at the same time.

"Get down!" Clementine can just shout hear herself over the gunfire, relieved to see that Louis, AJ and James had already found cover amongst the construction equipment and cement blocks, along with the defected half of Nathan's army now scrambling for their own cover.

Aasim, Ruby, Willy and Omar had already gotten up off from the ground, picking up any weapons they could find from those that had already fallen and joining them in searching for their own cover. Doctor Williams had flung himself to the ground, crawling to whatever safety he could find. The bullets whizzed around them like a heavy rainstorm, each passing piece of metal ready to take their lives, if they were only to move an inch in one direction.

It was funny. Well, not really. Not at all, in fact. Quite the opposite. But right now, as he sat with his back to a block of concrete, chest heaving and heart pounding in his ears, the heavy weight of his pistol resting against his lap, held securely in his sweaty palms, Louis can't help but think about all the preparation that went into this. They weren't expecting _this,_ but they were expecting... Well, they were expecting for something to go wrong, which it did.

And even so, all that hard work, months and months of Clementine drilling instructions into their heads like an army sergeant, making sure they _all_ know what to do in these kinds of situations, how to stay _alive._

Its all flown right out of his head.

Chaos. That's what it is. The scent of blood is thick in the air, and he doesn't even want to think about whose it is, just as much as he knows he'll be hearing those agonised screams of pain for the rest of his life. The fact that he can even hear them over the gunfire is a miracle in itself. At least, it would be, except he'd rather be deafened by the gunfire than to hear that...

His brain seems to go into some form of autopilot, as he looks down to see his thumb fiddling with the safety switch of his pistol, resting his head against the block he's leaning against as he cocks the hammer back into place, finger hovering just over the trigger as he readies himself.

He takes a deep breath in, letting the cold air of the night fill his lungs, holding it in as he slowly peeps around his cover-

-And immediately regrets it when a bullet lodges itself in the concrete mere inches from his face.

He practically flings himself back into cover, the breath he had held in having wooshed out of his lungs, his calm and collected breathing now being replaced with frantic, borderline panic attack levels of inhalation.

_Awesome. They were all going to die here_

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_They were NOT going to die here_

At least, that's what Clementine kept telling herself, as she returned fire against the (much too young) soldiers, people that she had hoped they would find a way to sway to their cause.

But now wasn't the time for guilt, nor for regret. It was exactly the reason why she was telling herself that they _weren't_ going to die, as any other type of thinking was dangerous, would do nothing good.

Especially when, in the times that she glances over to Louis, to AJ, to James, any of them, they're doing the exact same. They're looking _to_ her, fear in their eyes, looking for guidance, for a way through this... This _mess,_ this entire damn warzone they had walked right into.

So, when they looked to her with that fear in their eyes, she had to make sure she looked back without that fear in her own. She had to ensure that she looked back with reassurance, with nothing but _confidence_ that they were going to make it out of here alive.

She had to make them believe they were going to make it. Even if she wasn't entirely sure of that herself.

Clementine does her best to drown out the pained scream of the 15-year-old she just shot through the chest, ducking back behind cover before she herself could be hit. She releases the now empty mag, fumbling for an already filled one and pushing it into place, pulling the slide of the gun back as she glances cautiously around the edge of her cover to get a better look.

A quick glance tells her that they had made a fair amount of progress, spotting a few dead bodies littered on the ground, unmoving legs poking out from the cover their owner was originally crouched behind.

There was still a fair amount of ground to cover, already planning their next possible moves in her head. There was a decent amount of debris ahead of them they could use as cover, allowing them to inch closer to the other side, closer to Nathan's army.

Closer to Nathan himself.

If he hadn't taken the coward route and escaped in the chaos, that is.

Only one problem with moving forward; One step into the open, and they'd find themselves riddled with lead.

Glancing over to her left, she sees AJ and James, concentration set in their gazes as they fire their weapons over their cover. One, two, maybe three shots, then they would hide back behind their cover, evading the incoming retaliation.

"AJ!" Clementine yells over all the noise, relieved he's able to hear her over everything when his head snaps over to her side.

"We need to move up!" She continues to shout, pointing forward to get her point across

"What do you need me to do?!" AJ asks, taking the short break to reload his weapon

"I need you and James to cover the left side for me while I move up, keep their attention away from me!"

"You got it!"

AJ is quick to turn to James, to which Clementine can only assume he's passing on her message, judging by the slow nod and thumbs up she gets from James.

Clementine lifts her hands to them, raising her forefinger in the "one-second" sign, letting them know she wasn't ready to go quite yet.

They'd be covering her left side. Problem was, Ruby, Aasim and Willy were to the left of James and AJ. While they could help to cover the left side, it meant there was no one to help cover her right side.

No one but...

Looking over to her right, her heart sinks slightly at the frightened, trembling form of Louis, looking a moments notice away from passing out from nothing but complete and utter terror.

Not that she could blame him.

In fact, she had to commend him. Because despite how terrified he looked, he wasn't running away. He was still _fighting,_ pushing through and ignoring what she can only imagine is every basic instinct not to lean out from his cover, firing rounds into the crowd of soldiers that were firing back at him.

And oh God, did that do nothing but terrify her even more.

Louis wasn't a fighter. But he was doing his damn best to play as one right now.

"Louis!" She calls out for him, and it takes him a moment before his terrified eyes settle on hers, relief shining through when he spots her, seeing that she was okay

Like with the others, she jabs her hand in the direction of the loose cement block in front of them. Louis' eyes flicker between the block and herself, the question of what she was trying to get at clear by his expression.

"Cover my right side!" She yells, pointing over towards the right side of the soldiers they were facing down to get her point across  
"I'm moving up!"

Louis most certainly didn't look happy by this suggestion, but it's not exactly like this was the best place to argue about it. That doesn't stop him from hesitating though, mouth slightly open as the words he wants to speak are fighting their way out of his mouth.

Instead of letting them have their way, Louis forces his mouth shut, taking a deep breath to push down his fear, his uncertainty and overall instinct screaming at him 'This seems like a really damn stupid idea, she's running _towards_  the bullets', nodding to let her know he was on board.

Clementine checks that her gun is fully loaded one more time before shifting in place, preparing herself for a short sprint to the next cover. Glancing over to her sides, she sees that James, AJ and Louis are watching her, waiting for her to signal that she was ready.

Was she ready to run straight towards Nathan and his men? God no, not in the slightest, but it was better she got them started, advancing towards Nathan's Army, before they started advancing towards them...

Clementine raises her hand into the air, not high enough that it would be out of cover and risked a bullet going through it, but high enough that the others could see it. She splays out her fingers to signal the number five, pausing for a moment to make sure the others were seeing what she was doing before continuing the countdown, slowly bending her fingers down one after the other.

4...

3...

2...

1...

Louis, James and AJ rise from their cover in sync, firing into the crowd of Nathan's Army. It does its job, as she sees a large number of Nathan's men scramble for cover, ducking from the onslaught of bullets headed their way.

Clementine had never been so thankful to hear the roar of gunfire from behind her as the defected side of Nathan's men joined in, adding to the cover fire. She had to give Nathan credit where it was due, they had picked up on the plan and joined in very quickly.

It was now or never. Nathan's men had been sent scrambling for cover, and she doubted they would be distracted for too long before they began to fire back. She pulls her pistol to her side, holding it close to her leg and readying herself; a deep breath in. Hold it. A deep breath out.

And then she runs

She sends out a short prayer, the part of Louis's personality that had rubbed off on her adding that she hoped she wouldn't be accidentally shot by one of her own people...

Back when she was behind cover, it didn't look as far. Maybe 10, 15 yards? Logically, she knew she had only been running for a few seconds at the least, but it _felt_ like she had been out in the open for much too long, like that piece of concrete was always stretching further and further away from her, no matter how fast she ran.

The force that strikes her in the leg is as surprising as the ground is when it rises to meet her. Clementine has _no_ clue what had happened, only that it felt like something _powerful_  had slammed into her leg, sending her careening into the dirt below. Her head struck the ground hard, hard enough that her vision faded in and out, sounds distorted as she felt her brain rattling away within the confinements of her skull.

The gunfire around her was as distorted as everything else, giving the feeling that they were having their gunfight underwater. It's enough to register in her brain however that there was still a fight going on, and she was out in the open like a sitting duck.

Clementine fights through her own spinning vision and aching body, pushing herself onto her side and scrambling at the ground beneath her, pulling herself across the ground and towards cover, every attempt to get to her feet resulting in her tripping on her own feet and sending her back to the ground. After the second failed attempt, she decides it would be best to stick to crawling...

Hands were grabbing at her arms, frantic yet surprisingly gentle. The adrenalin coursing through her veins seems to double, and she puts all her strength into fighting back; punching, striking, clawing and kicking at the assailant trying to drag her away.

"Clem! Clem! Shit, it's me! It's me!"

Louis' strained voice is enough for her movements to still, but does nothing to lessen the panic and adrenaline still running strong throughout her body. It was bad enough she was out in the middle of no man's land, now Louis was too?

"C'mon... Come on, Clem. Help me here"

Oh. Right, yeah, she should probably be moving.

Looking at Louis now was like looking at a completely different person. Just seconds ago, he was frightened-looking boy sat behind his cover, looking like he hated every time he had to fire a single bullet. That look was gone now, replaced by sheer determination to get Clementine back to safety, one hand still securely wrapped around her arm for support as the other fires bullets into the opposing army trying to bring their lives to an early end.

They slam into the concrete block a tad harder than they were supposed to, but Louis decides it would probably be a lot less painful than being hit by a bullet. In the off chance that it didn't go through his head, that is...

Clementines slightly wobbly movement next to him makes his chest clench in worry, seeing her shake her head dizzily and place her gun down on the floor.

"The hell did you do that for?" Clementine snaps at him, and Louis can't help but stare dumbfounded at her, no clue as to why she was so angry at him.

"Do what?"

"Put yourself in danger like that! Do you have any idea how easily you could have been shot running out like that?!"

She... She couldn't be serious...

"Clem... You're joking, right?"

"You should have stayed in cover, Louis! I don't need you risking your life for me"

He nearly did laugh at that one

"Oh sure, yeah Clem. I saw you fall to the ground, _crawling_ away and my first thought was; 'This is fine, she has this, I'll stay _right here',_ no problem!"

Her glare didn't falter in the slightest but, judging by the puff of air she let's out, she had decided this wasn't the time for this argument.

"What the hell even happened anyway?" Louis asks  
"Jesus, Clem, I thought you were shot, and-"

Louis stops, mouth clamping back shut as his face pales and his eyes widen, the fear she had seen earlier quick to return to his face.

"Clem, you...You weren't shot, were you?" Louis asks, eyes already roaming over her, looking for any sign of that deep dark red...

"No, I-" Clementine begins, confusion flitting across her face as she glances down at her legs.  
"Something... _hit_  me. It was enough for my leg to give out and-"

This time it's Clementine who stops in her speech, hands grabbing at the hem of her pants leg and pulling the material up.

There, lodged in the plastic of her fake leg, was a single bullet.

"Huh" Is all she can say through the shock  
"I... I was shot"

And for the first time since that horrific day, that day she wished could be erased from her memory, from her life, she was actually feeling _glad_  that she had lost that leg.

Pounding footsteps from behind Louis sharply brings him back into reality, a harsh reminder of the situation they were currently in. To his relief, he sees AJ, James, Ruby, Omar, Aasim and Willy alive and well, pushing forward to join them in their new cover. There's a wave of Nathan's defected people behind them, steadily moving up too. A relieving sight, and yet Louis has to choke down his own vomit when he sees them cautiously step over their fallen friends.

"It's not over yet" Clementine mumbles from beside him, already raising her weapon up in front of her  
"We have to end this, Louis. We have to stop Nathan, one way or another"

Louis was fairly certain there was only one sure fire way they could stop him

"Then let's get this over with" He replies, bringing up his own weapon  
"Let's get home"

Clementine gives him a weak, timid smile that he doesn't want to think too much on what it means, not when he has to focus on the task at hand.

Pulling himself up against the cover, he raises his hand holding the gun over the top, firing a few shots blindly in the hopes it'll send Nathan's army back into cover, thus giving him those few precious seconds to check what was happening.

When he peeks his head cautiously over the top of the cover, he was expecting to be met with a wall of young men and women, crouched with guns at the ready, firing not only at what they would surely see as the traitors among their group, but at his friend's and family too.

Which, yes, is technically what he saw. But that's not what his brain focused on, what immediately caught his eye the second he glimpsed a look over at the other side.

Because there, standing amongst his men, firing shot after shot at what Louis can only assume (and fear) were his loved ones, was Nathan.

Holy Shit. This was his chance.

Which meant he _really_  couldn't mess this up

You know how in all those cliche action movies, in that super important moment, everything suddenly feels like it's gone into slow motion for the hero, giving them infinite time to prepare for the killing blow?

Well, Louis can tell you now from experience, that's a load of bullshit.

He had never been more aware of the finite amount of time he had, never so aware of the tremble of his hands and the shakiness in his breaths as he lifted his pistol up, aiming straight at Nathan's skull.

No, everything around him wasn't feeling slow, but his own actions sure as hell did feel that way.

_You can't miss. This is it, your one shot. Don't fuck it up_

His own inner monologue certainly wasn't helping right now, but dammit, it was _right._ Who knows if they'll ever get another chance? Maybe they will, maybe it's after so many lives have been lost? Maybe it's after he loses his friends? Maybe it's after he loses his surrogate son? Maybe it's after he loses the love of his life, and in addition, his unborn ~~child~~  daughter?

He could stop it all. Prevent it from happening before it even has the chance.

All he had to do was pull this trigger.

So, he does.

And as he does, he watches Nathan's head snap back from the force of the bullet colliding with his head, watches the spray of blood that accompanies it.

Watches, as Nathan's body collapses to the ground.

Watches, no _l_ _istens_  as the gunfire falls silent.

As Nathan's army's firing slowly staggers to a stop, shocked and confused faces turning to the body that had just dropped within, hushed whispers spreading out within the crowd, beginning from those closest to Nathan's fallen body, spreading out to the edges of the crowd.

Everyone else was as confused as Nathan's army, hands still tightly gripped around their weapons, befuddled by the sudden cease-fire. Louis meanwhile is alternating his dumbfounded look between where he saw Nathan fall, and the weapon in his hands that had made that happen.

His _hands_  that had made that happen.

Clementine looks just as bewildered, staring at the nervously shifting army opposite them, shifting that look over to Louis.

"What... He... Did... Did you hit him?" Clementine finally forms a question

"Yeah. Yeah, I did" Louis responds shakily. Somehow, only now did he say it out loud, confirmed it, did it settle in what he had done

"They've stopped..." Clementine whispers breathlessly, gaze returning to the halted army.

"Is it over?" Louis asks hopefully

The harsh whispers from the crowd that they had slowly gotten used to, like an angry beehive somewhere in the background, chose then to fall silent.

That kind of uncomfortable, tension-filled, "somethings about to happen" silence that feels like its stretching out for eternity.

That "something", as it turns out, is for the gunfire to start right back up again.

And now, again, they find themselves ducking down for cover, no less confused than they were moments ago. In fact, to be frank, they were _infinitely_  more confused than they were.

"What's happening?!" AJ shouts over the commotion  
"Why had they stopped?! Why did they start again?!"

Clementine didn't have an answer for that

Their whole plan was based on taking Nathan down. Ideally, as quietly as possible. Zara herself had said it, if Nathan goes down if the 'leader of the pack' does down, is no longer fit for duty, then Nathan's army would back down.

So why were they still fighting?

"Maybe... Maybe they do have some sort of loyalty" Clementine guesses weakly  
"Maybe now they want revenge?"

"And how likely are they to get it?" Louis asks worriedly

Clementine didn't have an answer for that, either.

Louis was about ready to curse up a storm. The plan couldn't have steered off course more than it already had. Despite this, despite this major fuck up, they had reached their end goal; Nathan was dead.

It just didn't end up in the result they wanted.

Louis could see all that his own thinking was reflected on Clementine's face, watching the desperation and the determination that willed her to continue firing her weapon into all those people, all those _children_ that were doing what they thought was right, what they had been _conditioned_ to think was right.

He knew that doing this, taking all these lives, was killing her as much as it did him. That they were only doing what had to be done to survive. Knew that, she wasn't just fighting for her own life, but for her childs. For all of theirs.

They could die here. It was very, very likely that they were going to die here.

"Marry me?"

Damn his too fast mouth, damn his tongue for speaking the words he was thinking without his permission. Damn his awful, dreadful, no good sense of timing.

At least, judging by how fast Clementines head snaps over to his, and by the look of " _I_ _swear to God, if I just heard what I think I heard..."_

"What did you just say?" She asks him, eyes as wide as saucers

Screw it, not like he was one to back out of things.

"Marry me" Louis repeats, this time putting a lot more confidence into his voice

"Marry you? What, you-- You mean now?"

It would be really inappropriate to laugh right now, wouldn't it? Not just in the middle of a battlefield, but in the middle of... Well, his _proposal._

"Uh, no. Not now" He answers with his trademark grin  
"But after we get out of this. Which we will. So, what do you say?"

Clementine blinks owlishly at him, mouth opening and closing of its own accord as her brain tries to catch up with what was happening. Her eyes scan all across his face, in a way he just knows is her trying to see if he was joking or not.

She seems to come to the conclusion that he's not, as her mouth slams shut and stills, regarding him with an all too familiar " _God, you're such an idiot look_ " before she opens her mouth to answer.

That's when the bullet rips through his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also please don't kill me...


	19. Chapter 19

There's no pain.

At least, not at first. All Louis is able to tell is that something was wrong. Something that made his knees give out from under him, sent him sprawling into the dirt below with a shocked gasp.

Still no pain. Instead this weird feeling, like... Heat and Cold at the same time, an odd sort of tingling and buzzing under his skin. Adrenaline, perhaps? Or maybe shock doing its work as he rolls over onto his back, gasping for air like his lungs can't get enough.

Wetness. That's what it was. Warm, sticky wetness, coating his side, slipping down his body, steadily oozing out of him with every panicked beat of his heart.

Then the pain hits.

Not as sharp as he'd expected, like the bullet that had passed through him. And yet, the pain was more... Blunt. As if someone had slammed into his sides with a baseball bat.

Someone with superhuman strength that is.

Then there's the next wave.

_Burning_

Now, this... This is a pain he doesn't know how to handle.

It was like fire, licking a path through his stomach. He could physically _feel_  the damage the bullet had done; muscles and tendons, arteries and veins and capillaries all torn apart by the foreign piece of metal passing through him. It felt like the fire was reaching out, attempting to spread its path of destruction further across his body.

There was nothing he could do but lay there on the ground, and hope this wasn't the end.

Everything was much too quiet. The gunfire had stopped once more, except for the echoing remains of a gunshot from the gun that had brought him down. Someone was calling his name, their voice panicked and laced with fear, and gentle hands were pressed against his shoulders, then to his face, delicate fingers trembling as they trace across his skin.

"Step away"

That voice... It shouldn't have existed. Not when he had shot through the head of its owner. So why could he still hear it, dishing out commands they shouldn't have to follow?

"Over my dead body" A very agitated sounding voice snaps back. If he had the energy, he would surely reach out to Clementine, stop her from making threats she can't afford to make. Not for him.

"That can be arranged"

At the sound of a guns hammer clicking into place, Louis musters up what energy he has to wearily glance over at the voice. There Nathan stood, pistol in hand, facing down a rage-filled Clementine who, despairingly, did _not_  have her gun in hand, yet faced the barrel of the gun like she didn't have a care in the world.

The side of Nathan's head was _caked_ in blood and, judging by the glossy sheen Louis could see, was still slowly bleeding from the bullet he took to his head.

Only, the damn thing hadn't gone through. It had grazed past him which, while it had probably knocked Nathan on his ass for a good while, hadn't been enough to kill him.

Not yet, anyway.

Gentle hands were replaced with rough and uncaring ones, tugging him forcefully up onto his feet. The sound that leaves him at the jarring movement doesn't sound human, even to his own ears, an involuntary response to the God awful pain that seared through his body, feeling an extra wave of blood being pushed out of his body.

"Don't touch him" Clementine demands sharply, searching for her own weapon that she had dropped in her panic at the sight of Louis being shot.

The second she curls her fingers around the familiar metal grip, she's greeted by a wall of Nathan's surviving army, half of their guns trained on her, while the other half was focused on the other Ericsons kids, along with the defected side of Nathan's army.

There would be no point. Killing Nathan now, trying to get him away with Louis... What would stop Nathan's men from opening fire, killing them all right here?

It was only Zara who had said the army would back down if Nathan was killed. So while that was certainly an option... Well, she couldn't exactly take Zaras word on this... Not when the man in question is holding a severely injured Louis in his grasp.

"So... _Difficult"_  Nathan whispers harshly under his breath as he tightens his hold on Louis, who was doing his best to wiggle out of Nathan's grasp  
"Why did you have to make this so _difficult?"_

Nathan's eyes are fixated in Clementine as he speaks, though with his firm grip on Louis, he begins to drag him backwards, slowly moving away inch by inch, progress hindered by Louis' feet stubbornly scrambling for purchase on the dirt beneath him as he's dragged against his will.

"What else did you expect us to do?" Clementine asks weakly  
"What were _you_  trying to do?"

"Trying to build a better life. Even... Even when others can't see it. And you know what? They might never will. And it doesn't even _matter._ Because even blind and arrogant, they're still *there*, don't you see? They'll still be alive, and you know who did that? _Me._ Apparently, the only goddamn person around here that _cares-"_

"Cares for a future built on blood!" Clementine argues back

It's then, with a jolt of terror, she realises where Nathan was slowly dragging himself and Louis to, so distracted by the bleeding man in Nathan's arms that she didn't think to get a proper look behind him.

_He was heading towards that Goddamn Walker pit_

"So what!"

"You might be right"

A third voice adding into the conversation stills both Clementine and (much to her relief) Nathan, glancing over to see James slowly rising from his spot in cover, arms raised to show his hands were empty and that he was no threat.

"At least, that's what I thought. Back when I was one of them" James continues, slowly reaching into his coat pocket to remove his walker mask, hurling it into the floor so Nathan could get a good look at it.

"Our methods were...disgusting. Monstrous. We murdered, _slaughtered_  people, simply for being at the wrong place at the wrong time. Such a horrific act, and yet... I got used to it. It was just another daily occurrence, something that just happened in life.  
I didn't care. Didn't care what we doing because, hey, at the end of it all, I was alive. As were the others.  
I had to be the one to shake myself out of that. To take the time to sit back and think: All those people, all with lives of their own; Born into this world just as I was, built their own stories, their lives intertwining with others. Simply by _existing,_  their life can have such a different impact on this world, changes that, while may seem small to us, can be the most important to others.  
And I had taken that life without a second thought"

James' words were reaching to Nathan, Clementine could tell. He was at least listening, his movement having come to a standstill. Even Louis seemed to have stopped his struggle momentarily to listen. ( _At least, that's what Clementine told herself, ruling out the OTHER possibility. Especially not noting the way the color was slowly fading from his face..._ )

"Don't tell me you're gonna give me that crap about how the thing you had to think about was whether your life is worth more than theirs?" Nathan responds, sarcasm practically dripping from his words.

"I could. But then I'd be lying to myself. I think humans are selfish, in that way. No matter what we think, or at least, the way we _believe_  we'll think in the moment, it never seems to go that way. Self-preservation is hard to shake off. Always that part of you that wants to live.  
No, I had to think to myself... Was it necessary?"

"What? Living?"

"No. All those lives I took... Did any of them _really_  keep me alive? Would I be dead, if I were not to take these lives?"

"That's not really a question that can be answered"

"No, it's not. So why do it?"

"Because precautions are necessary. Sometimes they have to be made, just in case"

"See now, this is where you have to stop and _think._ To exist in this world you're creating, the world that I was once myself making... Would I be happy, to live in a future where there's no turning back? To continue on the path I was walking on, all in the name of _'survival?'"_

"Sometimes there's no other choice" Nathan argues back, unconsciously loosening his grip on Louis, who seems much too weak to take notice of something like that.

"There's _always_ a choice." James insists softly  
"You don't like that path? You don't always have to turn back and take the opposite way. If you don't like it, then you build a _new_ one. You find a way to change things, because at the end of the day, someone has to. If something's broke, you don't find a way to avoid it. You _fix_  it"

And then there's that look again on Nathan's face; That uncertainty, what must be a million thoughts crossing through his mind, little arguments about whether to listen or not.

He's standing much too close to that walker pit for Clementines liking, much too close when Louis looks like he's barely hanging onto consciousness, in which with one wrong step, one small slip, there would be no way for Louis to catch himself before he plummets down into that hole of death.

Clementines hates this feeling of helplessness. Louis' life is, quite literally, in Nathan's hands. Not even the gun she holds in her own can do anything, not when Nathan is practically using Louis as a sheld.

But then, that's the thing. Truth be told, even if he _wasn't_ using Louis as a shield, if she had a clear shot, Clementine knew it would get them nowhere. Not when Nathan's army still have faith in Nathan, No, shooting Nathan would only mean the rest of them were guaranteed to join him in the realm of the dead.

There was nothing she could do now, Nothing except, hope. _Pray._ Pray that James' message goes through, that, by some miracle that seems more unlikely with every passing second, that Nathan somehow changes his mind on the whole thing.

Small steps at a time. Such a thing seems so far away from happening, so right now, she prays for smaller things. Right now, she just wants Nathan to let go of Louis. To have him back by her side. To get him _help,_ before... Before it was too late.

Of course, that not what happens. The thoughtful look on Nathan's face disappears, twisting into something much uglier, something more... Almost painful? Yes, he looked angry, but there was something there, something like he was about as happy with what he was doing as they were.

"No..." Nathan hisses, placing his vice-like grip back around Louis, who whines softly at the extra bout of pain the movement brings  
"That just won't _work_ anymore. I tried, okay? I really did try. But you know what it ended up with? _Death._  Every turn I made, every decision, _good people died_. You know what they say, right? ' _Why is that good people die, while the assholes seem to live?_ '. Well, if I want to live in this shitty world, guess that means I have to be the asshole, huh?"

"No, it's not-" James tries to argue

"YES, IT IS!" Nathan yells back, gaze snapping over to look James directly in the eyes.  
"This world don't give two shits if you're good or bad! That's not a thing anymore! Now it's the weak or the strong! Kill or be killed! And I for one sure ain't being the one that's killed"

"Not quite" James counters

" _What_?"

"It's not quite kill or be killed" James continues, casting a quick side glance over to Clementine  
"But it's pretty damn close. It's up to us to decide if that's what it becomes. The choice is in your hands"

Everything feels much too silent now. That eerie sort, where you just know that something bad is about to come, the small moment of peace lulling them into a false sense of security.

The calm before the storm.

"Yes..." Nathan mutter quietly, giving a small nod of his head.  
"Yes, the choice is in my hands isn't it?"

He finally takes his gaze off James long enough to glance down at Louis in his arms, a soft, sad look crossing his face as he looks at the bleeding boy.

"Guess its time I make that decision"

With that, he curls his fingers around the lapel of Louis' trench coat and yanks him behind as he turns, holding Louis precariously just over the edge of the walker pit.

Clementine thought the morning sickness she had been experiencing would be the worst case of nausea she ever had to experience, but that title might just have to go to the way her stomach seems to fold in on itself at the sight of Louis wobbling over the edge, weakly grasping at the hold Nathan has on his coat. Whether to grab on for dear life, or try to yank himself out of Nathans grip, she doesn't know.

"I have a job to do; Separating the weak from the strong, ensuring that only the best continue, that the best ensure our survival. And dammit, I'm going to do that job till I take my last breath"

"Please-" Clementine begs, and while usually she'd hate the small warble in her voice, she can't seem to care all that much right now.  
"-Don't do this. Don't take him from us"

"This isn't the right choice to make. You _know_  it isn't" James implores, still desperately trying to reach a part of Nathan that Clementine is sure to be long gone by this point.

AJ is oddly quiet next to James, and with a jolt, Clementine realises there are fresh tear trails running down his face. Perhaps he can't trust himself to speak right now.

Or perhaps, like herself, he knows that talking won't do much help right now.

Not when it seems like Nathan has already made his choice.

Louis removes one hand that's holding Nathan's arm for support to slowly reach towards Nathan. He weakly and clumsily places a hand down on Nathan's chest; not striking him, not grabbing hold of his clothes, simply placing his hand flat down onto his chest.

Nathan flinched slightly at the touch, perhaps expecting a harsher touch than the gentler one he got, gazing inquisitively up at Louis.

"See?" Louis says, and the slight slur of the word doesn't boost Clementines confidence all that much.  
"I knew there was a heart buried in there somewhere"

Louis pats at the spot to accentuate his point, and Clementine is torn between an odd mixture of wanting to burst into tears or to punch Louis for whatever stupid point he's trying to make.

"You don't... Always show it..." Louis continues, sounding as if speaking long sentences was a very tiring ordeal  
"But... It's there...When you gave Clem that leg... It was there... When you... Became torn up about... About Jack... It was there... And when... Just now, you asked for your daughter... It was there"

It looks like Louis' words are physically hurting Nathan, as if hearing them were actually painful, almost wincing at every point Louis made.

"You have another chance... Right now... A better way... We can all work together, coz... Coz that's what it's all about, right? Sure, killing each other is one method... But what if we work together instead? Coz maybe the good guys die, while... while the assholes live, but... What if the good guys teamed up? What if we... We changed that rule?"

Nathan pauses for just a brief moment, before he looks up the sky with Clementine was certain was a watery sounding chuckle, sucking in air through his teeth, savoring the sharp sting of the nights cool air in his lungs as he exhales and looks back down to Louis.

"I really liked you, kid" Nathan tells him softly, patting Louis heavily on the shoulder  
"I always kind of expected we would end up here, thought it might be difficult to bring you around, but... _Goddamit,_ I was really hoping, y'know? All of you, we... We would have made such a difference..."

Louis lets his hand slowly slip away from Nathan's chest, returning to its spot clasped around Nathan's wrist. For once, it seems, all words have failed Louis.

"You have no idea how much I don't want to do this" Nathan whispers, the grip he has on Louis starting to tremble.  
"But we both know I have to"

And then Clementine sees his fingers slowly begin to uncurl, the only thing holding Louis there in place, stopping him from dropping down into that pit and it's all just _too much-_

"Step away!"

Nearly everyone's heads snap towards the new voice, except for Clementine who can't seem to tear away from Louis. To her immense relief, the sudden interruption seems to have made Nathan re-tighten his grip on Louis, pulling him slightly closer.

Slightly further away from the pit.

It's only once she's sure Louis isn't going to drop down that she allows herself to look over in the direction of the voice. Not that she has to, of course. She'd recognise her voice without seeing the face to match it.

That voice shouldn't be here. Neither should the person next to her. But God, is she happy to see them.

"Stop what you're doing. Let him go" Zara commands, keeping her gun trained on her father. Violet stands dutifully by her side, her own gun kept up at guard but not aiming at anyone in particular right now, instead using her good eye to scan the army that had switched their aim from Clementine to them.

"Zara?" Nathan asks, truly unable to believe it was his daughter right in front of him, pointing a gun to his head. It was, perhaps, the most lost Clementine had ever seen him  
"Zara, what are you doing?"

"Making the right choice"

"The right choice? You--You can't be serious?"

"I've never been more sure of a decision in my life" Zara says, cocking the hammer of her gun back.

"What the hell happened to you?" Nathan asks, eyes widening at the sound of the gun being prepared to shoot.  
"Why would you-"

Nathan trails off, slowly looking to Violet next to her, then back to Zara. His eyes flick between the two of them for a bit and, while Clementine doesn't see anything on Zaras face that would give someone away, Nathan sure seems to see something.

"Oh, Zara, you didn't..." Nathan murmurs softly, shaking his head in disappointment.  
"Her? _Really?"_

"Yes, _her"_ Zara spits back with venom, angered by the clear disappointment in her father's tone.

"Look at the girl! She looks like she could barely shoot a walker that was two feet in front of her!"

Both Zara and Violet wear matching scowls at this comment.

"You know what I'm sick of, dad? The judgement. That's all it is with you, isn't it? Every person you meet, there are strict values you put into place, deciding whether a person _is...worthy._ You ever considered that what you value most in a person _might_ just be different to anothers?"

"The hell happened to you?" Nathan asks his daughter, sounding genuinely disheartened by the words she had spoken to him  
"This isn't the same girl I last saw. Certainly not the girl I _entrusted_  this task with? I thought..."

"You thought _what?"_

"I thought you were better than this, Zara. Now look at you"

"Yeah. Look at me" Zara agrees with a snarl at her father  
"It might be hard to see right now, but you know what the biggest difference is from the person I was before? I'm _happy._ I'm actually happy with my life, and as my father, you should be happy _f_ _or_  me. But you're not, are you? Not unless I'm molded into your vision of the perfect child...Just another one of your soldiers, wasn't I?"

"No. Like I said, you were supposed to be _better._ I wanted... I wanted the best for you, Zara. I was _trying_ to do all I could to make sure you achieved that. Apparently... I failed"

"Yeah, you sure did" Zara agrees  
"And you know what? Thank fuck you did"

"You might think you're better off now, Zara. Everything might seem okay now. But what happens down the line? What happens in a few years, a few months, hell, even tomorrow? There will be a new danger, just as there always is, and one day, you won't be strong enough to handle one of them"

"I will. You know why? Because we're better working _together._ Not in this conquest to wipe out the whole entire damn human race, but finding a way to live peacefully, or as close to that as we can get. Which is why I need you to let Louis go, dad. Get him away from that edge and we can get him some medical help. All these other people, all injured, and for what? Proving a point? They need _help,_  and we can give that to them"

"No" Nathan says, shaking his head sadly  
"No, you're wrong. You won't be stronger together. Because you're together now, aren't you? And yet, you're not strong. Here you are in front of me, a gun to my face. And you cant _do it_.  
I know you, Zara. More than you might think. Loyalty is a finicky thing for you, I know, and you might think you've entirely convinced yourself you're loyal to these kids now.  
But there was once a time where you would do all you could to protect me, just as I do for you. You might believe that's gone, but it's there. Buried deep down maybe, but it's there.  
So when you find yourself trying to squeeze that trigger, desperately crying out for why you can't? There's your answer"

Clementine had to admit, if this was getting to Zara, she was doing a hell of a job of keeping her face blank. She didn't move an inch after Nathan's speech, not even the index finger placed on the trigger. No, that was as tightly wrapped around as it could go without fully pushing it in.

"Good thing that doesn't apply to everyone here then" Violet speaks up, slowly lifting up her own gun, levelling the barrel with Nathan's bloodied face.

"Go ahead. Shoot me." Nathan taunts her.  
"I'll tell you what could happen. Option one: You can't aim for shit, and Louis here gets caught in the crossfire"

Nathan even gives Louis a little shake and pulls him closer to himself, eliciting a small pained grunt from Louis at the jarring movement.

"Option two: You shoot me, and I fall back into this pit. Only, I'll be taking Louis with me.  
Option three: By some miracle, you shoot me, and Louis doesn't go down with me. Then my army opens fire, and you're all dead.  
Now, I'm not sure about you, but all those options don't sound too-"

"You forgot about option four" Zara butts in, slowly stepping closer to Nathan and Louis, Violet advancing alongside her.  
"Kind of like option three: You get shot, Louis doesn't fall. But your army doesn't open fire"

"And why the hell do you think-"

"What was the lesson you taught them? The whole point of it all, dad? It's all about survival of the fittest. To follow the strongest leader. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think you fit into that category when you're dead"

Nathan's eye twitched slightly, jaw clenching hard enough for his teeth to groan under the immense pressure.

"Then what reason is there for me not to order my troops to open fire right now?"

"The same why Louis is alive right now. The old you? He would have chucked Louis in that pit ten minutes ago. Something changed, didn't it? Louis was right. You _do_  have a heart.  
Your creation has been your own downfall here, dad. Because now, in the eyes of your own army, you're weak. You're not fit to lead them anymore. And they came to that decision a long time ago"

Nathan's eyes slowly slide over to his own army, who still stand with guns in hand, aimed in Zaras directions. After a few painstaking seconds, they begin to lower their guns down, as do the defected side, a non-spoken peace treaty suddenly coming into place.

"What are you doing?" Nathan asks his men, voice cracking near the end as panic and hysteria begins to sink in, yanking Louis away from him slightly as he turns to address his people.  
"I'm still here! You still follow me! You still-"

A gunshot rings out, interrupting Nathan, as Violet fires a single bullet into Nathan's kneecap. Nathan screams in agony, unconsciously releasing his grip on Louis who stumbles and collapses down to the ground a few feet away.

Nathan himself drops to the ground as the shattered bone in his knee is no longer able to take his weight. His hands shake as they press into the mess of blood, cartilage and bone fragments, tearily looking up at Zara and Violet, who now tower over him.

"Might not be able to shoot a walker two feet in front of me, but I can shoot a dick, apparently"

To their surprise, Nathan chuckles lightly at this, giving Violet a pained looking smile.

"I'll admit, you got me there" He tells her, slowly shaking his head in disbelief  
"You...both got me... You were _right._ I just can't believe it... My army aren't doing a _goddamn_ thing, coz you were _right..."_

"I wish this could have gone different" Zara whispers to her father, looking sadly down at the gun in her hands.  
"I wish I didn't have to do this-"

" _Wait, wait, wait!_ " Nathan pleads, that unfamiliar look of terror appearing on his usually blank and calm face.  
"You were right, okay? You were right about this, so... _Fuck,_ maybe you were right about the other things"

"What are you talking about?" Violet snaps at the babbling man

"I'm saying that... Maybe things can work your way, alright? If we give it a chance, then... I suppose its got a shot. Just, please, I... I can _help,_ okay? You know I can. You know I can be of some use, and... _Shit,_ I'm not ready to die. Not yet. That what you wanted to hear? You want to hear me be weak? Then fine! I'm... I'm afraid to die!"

It was with quite a jolt that Zara realised her father was even crying. She had barely noticed the glassy sheen in his eyes before, but now it was hard to miss the drops that were steadily sliding down his face, the ragged breaths in his chest a mix between caught sobs and what sounded like a borderline panic attack.

 _"Please..."_ He begs once more, shaky hand reaching up for his own daughter

For a moment, it seems like Zara isn't going to do anything, as she remains as stiff as a board, still holding her gun limply in her hands. Then, ever so slowly, she reaches out a hand tentatively for her father.

He weakly clasps onto the hand she had offered, letting himself be pulled up as she yanks on his arm. Nathan teeters in place slightly, relying now on only one leg as the other had no hope of keeping him upright in its current condition.

"I think you were right too, Dad" Zara tells him with a soft smile  
"You do sort of know me. Just as I know you.  
Just as I know that everything you just said is a lie, that you'll _never_ be able to give up your mission. Not when you so truly believe it to be right. Which is what makes this so much harder..."

 _"Zara..._ " Nathan whispers in horror, hands now desperately clutching at his daughters shirt.  
"Please _don't._ You... You _can't._ We're _family-"_

"You're my dad, but you're sure as hell not my family. These guys I'm fighting beside?"

Zara grabs at her fathers hands, yanking them off of her and holding them tightly in her grasp.

_"They are"_

And with one hard push, she shoves Nathan backwards. Down he goes, down into that deep dark pit where walkers line the bottom, hungrily awaiting their incoming meal...

\------------------------------------------------------------------------___-------

What Clementine was expecting was... Well, she wasn't entirely sure. A storm of bullets as Nathan's army opens fire anyway? Some sort of altercation to break out? Yelling?

None of that happened. It was eerily quiet, apart from the droplets of rain pounding on the muddy floor she remained knelt on, and the eager groans of the dead as they fed on their next meal. The amount of them, the sheer volume of their groans emanating from down in that pit...

She was just thankful their sounds blocked out most of what was really happening down there. No sounds of bones being crunched and snapped, no sounds of skin and muscles being torn away and munched on by decaying teeth. Not even any screams of agony as they tore into him.

Had Nathan died on impact? Or perhaps the walkers had gone straight for the jugular, bleeding him out in seconds? Or maybe even Nathan was somehow finding a way to keep silent through what must be immense pain?

No matter how much she resented the bastard, part of her hoped it was quick.

At least, that was her line of thinking, until her focus was brought back to attention by the shifting trench-coat clad lump laid out across the floor.

_Louis had been shot_

She clambered hurriedly to her feet, darting over to Louis as fast as her legs could carry her. Violet had already made it to Louis' side, while Zara remained frozen where she was, staring down at the pit in front of her.

"Oh my God, Louis!"

The pained sound that came from Louis upon hearing her voice did nothing to lessen the fear that was clenched around her chest. He had somehow managed to get a knee underneath him, with a shaky arm planted firmly on the ground, making an attempt to push himself up.

It was more of a stumble than a movement, his legs giving out the second he got them on the floor, tripping over himself slightly and crashing back down onto his side with what was clearly a muffled scream of pain through his teeth.

"Christ, don't move Louis" Violet instructed him, her one good eye wide in panic.  
"You're gonna make it worse"

"-'M good" Louis tried to wave her off, and it's with a jolt of horror that she sees the red that filled the gaps between his clenched teeth, staining the usually white teeth with that crimson color.

Once more, Louis decides to ignore Violets instructions, instead trying again to stand by rolling onto his side and pushing himself up.

Only this time, he only makes it as far as onto his knees with his arms supporting most of his weight before he mages an awful gargled groaning kind of sound. Clementine doesn't even get a chance to ask him what's wrong before he opens his mouth and a rather unsettling amount of blood seems to pour out, his chest constricting and breaths coming out as more of a wheeze as his body attempted to rid the blood that had filled his throat.

"Maybe I'm not good" Louis wheezes out in a joke before collapsing back into his side with a breathy sort of a laugh.  
"Yeah...This isn't good"

"You need to stop moving, or you're going to end up doing yourself more harm than good" Clementine tells him as she places her hands over the gaping wound, applying firm pressure to it hoping that perhaps he'll listen to her when had hadn't to Violet

"Yeah... Okay, sure, no moving. I can do that" Louis agreed, barely moving his head in a nod as a sign of acceptance with his eyes clenched shut to fight against the waves of pain coursing through him.  
"Couldn't you be a bit more gentle there, Clem?"

"I know, I'm sorry" Clementine apologised with a genuinely regretful look, making sure to keep her hands pressed down hard  
"I have to, I'm sorry"

"-'S' kay. Know you're just... Doing what you have to..."

"Louis, you really shouldn't be talking" Violet tells him quietly  
"You need to conserve your energy as much as possible. Just focus on our voices, okay? Try and keep awake"

"Shouldn't be talking?" Louis repeats, cracking one eye open to peer up at Violet.  
"You _do_ know me, right? We've only... Know each other for what... Twelve years? Something like that..."

"Seriously, Louis" Clementine snaps, the urgency in her tone enough for Louis' weak gaze to slide over to meet hers.  
"Please, just... Do as we say"

All of a sudden the light, jokey glaze that always seemed to cover Louis' eyes seemed to vanish. Its replaced with a much heavier, solemn, almost apologetic look as he raises a trembling hand and covers Clementines blood-soaked ones, still firmly placed over his wound.

"I'm sorry" He tells her in a whisper, fingers momentarily tightening over her hand.  
"I didn't want to... Leave you quite yet... Not when... Not when our little girl is on the way, I-"

 _"Don't"_ Clementine cuts him off curtly, leaving no room for discussion.  
"No goodbyes. No apologies. You're _not_ going to die. I _won't_  let it happen. You're going to fine, okay?"

"Clem..."

"And you're going to meet our _son_  when you're all fixed up and healthy, okay?"

A weak laugh breaks through the serious expression on Louis' face, a foamy wisp of blood bubbling through his lips.

"Damn, just... Not gonna... Let that one go...are you?"

Louis's grip on her hand goes lax as he lets his head rest back against the ground, and Clementine has no time to process what that might mean before theres a group of soldiers by her side, an odd, long, board looking object being placed next to her, and then they're pushing Violet away and _pulling_ Louis away from her and no, that won't do, they can't just _take_  him away already, not when-

She's already prepared to fight her way through these people when there's a firm grip on her shoulder, which only makes her want to fight more. She very nearly does, except for when a familiar and, at this point, a Godsend of a voice reaches her ears.

"Clementine, he's not _dead,_ you need to calm down. He's just unconscious for the moment" Doctor Williams voice is calm yet firm, and it's enough for her to finally tear her gaze away from Louis to see what was going on all around her.

The two sides of the army had formed back into one, and they had already begun to clean up. The dead had started to be moved, dragged and carried away and laid down out of sight for the time being. The injured were also being carried away by those that had escaped unharmed, though they were headed for the big building that Clementine recognised as the bases hospital.

The only ones that weren't moving, standing out amongst the constant moving background behind them was everyone from Ericsons. It was a relief to see them all up and alive with minor injuries, as they stood still crowded around them, watching Louis with bated breath.

Zara had finally moved away from the pit, her gaze now solely focused on Louis with a pained and regretful expression, keeping a steady hand around Violets shoulders, who looked as if Zaras support was the only thing keeping her upright, ready to collapse to her knees at the sight of Louis...

Dying. He's dying.

"He's dying, but he's not dead yet. We need to get him medical treatment ASAP" Doctor Williams voice comes into focus, snapping Clementine out of her trance.  
"We need to move him into the stretcher and get him to the hospital"

: _You're in the way'_ A voice in her head whispers, and she's already scrambling away from Louis side seconds after hearing it. It pains her to do so, but she sees how quickly and efficiently the soldiers work, being cautious yet fast as they lift Louis onto the stretcher.

Within seconds they've lifted him up into the air and just like that he's _gone,_ already hurrying off to the hospital. There's no hesitation in her own movements as she takes off after them, lodged bullet in her leg be damned.

"I can help" Someone asserts, and Clementine looks over to see Ruby pacing after them  
"I have some medical knowledge, I can help with Louis. If you need it, I mean-"

"We can use all the help we can get" Doctor Williams gratefully takes the aid with a grim sort of smile  
"What do we know so far?"

"Male, aged around 23-25, approximate guess" One of the soldiers spills, and the odd professional sounding voice seems so... Out of place, even as they burst through the hospital doors and into the blinding white light of the rooms  
"Gunshot wound through the abdomen with excessive bleeding. Point of entry located in patients side, no exit wound found"

"Shit" Doctor Williams curses  
"Alright, that bullet could be blocking most of the bleeding, if we're lucky. But... It means we're going to have to find the bullet and get it out of him"

"Is that difficult?" Clementine is fearful to ask

"Depends how deep, usually. We might end up damaging him even more...How bad is the bleeding?"

"Rough estimate is around 20-25%" The soldier dutifully replies, reminding Clementine that a lot of Doctor Williams questions were going to be directed towards his helpers, not her  
"Patient was bleeding profusely from entry wound, though the flow seems to have slowed down slightly. Patient has also begun spitting up blood"

The fact that Doctor Williams only seemed to quicken his pace at this made Clementine want to drop right then and there.

"Can he survive losing that much?" Clementine dares to ask

"Hopefully" Doctor Williams answers with a pinched expression  
"On average, a person will die if they lose any more than 40% of their blood capacity. Though, the fact that he's begun spitting up blood..."

"Isn't... Isn't that normal? With bullet wounds?"

Doctor Williams shakes his head

"If he had been shot in the chest? Different story. In that case, blood enters the lungs and it gets coughed up. The only possible reason why he's spitting up blood after a shot to the stomach is that there's a lot of internal bleeding going on. Part of me is worried that bullet might have nicked an artery..."

"There's got to be something we can do, right?"

They rushed past countless lines of dead bodies covered with blankets, accompanied by rows of the injured, some lucky enough to have received a spot on the hospital beds, others forced to sit up against the wall or, if unconscious, were laid out on their backs on floor whilst being attended to by those few soldiers that had any type of medical knowledge, even if only a little bit.

"We'll be bringing him into surgery as soon as can, as you can see, we're a little short-staffed..."

"But there will be _s_ _omeone_  to operate on him?" Ruby questioned Doctor Williams, still keeping a steady pace beside the stretcher as they pushed through into one of the private rooms.

"I'll be doing the surgery myself" Doctor Williams answered, having already made his way over to a computer set up on a desk that sat neatly in the corner of the room.

It was such a strange sight to see; the flickering of the monitor as it came to life, a sight she hadn't seen in a long, _long_ time, all thanks to the solar generators scattered around the base, keeping the very building she stood in now, with all its machinery that was very likely keeping countless people alive, provided with power.

Standing here, in the perfect gleaming white of the hospital, in this small little room, Clementine could almost convince herself that the apocalypse had never happened. It was all too... Normal. Looked just like any other hospital she had visited before the world had gone to shit. Nathan really did have a good thing going here.

Only, no, he didn't. She couldn't let herself think that, not when she knows full well the horrors Nathan did to _achieve_  this. Even if it might end up saving Louis' life...

"However, as you already know, Louis has lost an alarming amount of blood already, and he's still losing more by the minute" Doctor Williams continues, pausing briefly in his hurried typing across the keyboard to spin around in his chair to face Clementine.

"What about that thing you were doing before?" AJ's voice from behind her nearly made her jump, spinning around to see that everyone from Ericsons had shouldered their way through to the hospital and followed them into the room, without her even noticing  
"Where you were taking the other people's blood? Can you not do that again and put it in Louis?"

"That's exactly what we're going to do" Doctor Williams told AJ with a soft but somewhat strained smile  
"I don't mean to alarm you, but I also don't like keeping the truth from people. If we don't do a blood transfusion, Louis isn't going to survive this. Not even if we do the surgery, not even if we wrap him up and hope the bleeding stops. He's already lost too much."

"But...You have stores of blood, right? Some sort of fridge where you keep it?" Aasim asked, eyes flicking from Doctor Williams to the worrying pale Louis, surrounded by soldiers with countless amounts of blood-stained gauze, valiantly attempting to slow the bleeding.

"Of course. Which leads me to my next question" Doctor Williams says, looking back over to Clementine  
"You wouldn't happen to already know his blood type, would you? We have the means to test his blood, but with time already as a factor-"

His _blood type_. Of all the countless talks they had, late-night conversations where they talked about everything and nothing, why had _this_ never come up? Something so potentially life-saving, and God, she didn't _know,_  she didn't-

"O-Negative" Violet pipes up, interrupting the panicked rant going on inside Clementines head, whirling her head round to Violet in surprise that she knew Louis' blood type, of all things  
"What? You don't think a guy like Louis isn't going to boast about how his blood type is apparently the rarest?"

"Rare?" Clementine repeats, turning worried eyes over to Doctor Williams  
"That's bad, isn't it? '

"Very" Doctor Williams replied grimly, raising a hand to rub at his forehead with a pained sigh  
"O-Negative is... Not _rare_ exactly, but it means he can _only_ receive O-Negative for a transfusion

Clementine knew she needed to ask the question, but it just wouldn't come to her lips, too afraid of the answer.

"Do you have anyone with that type?" Willy was brave enough to ask.

Doctor Williams chuckled grimly, but the small nod he gave was enough to light a small bit of hope in Clementines chest

"Yes, there is. Except..."

"Except what?"

"There was only one person. And that was Nathan"

And just like that, the small light of hope was extinguished

"I mean, even if he was still alive, I doubt he would have given it voluntarily, but..."

"Dad didn't keep any in reserves?" Zara asked quietly, trying to draw as little attention to herself

Doctor Williams paused at this, frowning slightly as he turned back to face the computer

"He did _sometimes_ , but last I saw him draw blood was quite a few months ago, and I know for a fact he used that up when he came back from, uh... An _excursion_ that went sideways"

The room fell dead silent after that, the only sound to be heard being the shuffling of the soldiers that tended to Louis along with the rhythmic clicking and clacking of the keyboard as Doctor Williams typed.

"Son of a bitch..." Doctor Williams whispered quietly in disbelief, sitting back on his chair as he stared at the computer in front of him  
"There's...There's a few bags in the reserves. He... He must have withdrawn some of his own blood shortly before all this... Perhaps to prepare in case it didn't go quite as he planned, but..."

Doctor Williams stood abruptly, quickly grabbing hold of his emotions and returning to his professional stature, the calm, calculated look of a Doctor returning as he raced over to Louis side, grabbing hold of one of the soldiers by the elbow to stop him in his movements.

"I need you to head to our blood reserves, pull out a bag of the O-Negative and get it here as soon as you can." Doctor Williams instructed the soldiers, who nodded vigorously and was rushing out of the room before Clementine could so much as blink.  
"The rest of you, prepare the patient for surgery. This room will have to do, we haven't got much else- Oh, good, you already have an IV set up, we'll need another one for the blood transfusion-- start the patient on 20cc's of Lidocaine, we'll worry about the morphine later"

Doctor Williams turned on his heel, eyes scanning the room before falling on Ruby, lifting a hand to point a finger at the nervous-looking redhead.  
"You; I need you to wash up and prepare for surgery. I know you don't have _that_  much experience, but I'm going to need all the help I can get here, even if it's just keeping track of vitals"

Ruby looked daunted by the prospect, but nodded her head confidently anyway, making her way over the prep area that one of the soldiers had paused in his duties to guide her over to.

"I can help, let me help" Clementine offer, already partly turning to the prep area herself, where Ruby was vigorously scrubbing her hands

"No" Doctor Williams spoked sharply, taking Clementine by surprise.

"No? I thought you said-"

"I'm sorry Clementine, I really am, but there's a reason it's a common rule in the medical field that doctors don't operate on their own family." Doctor Williams explained  
"Do you really think you'd be properly prepared for this? Prepared to see me slice him open, to pull that bullet out of him? Would you be able to hold yourself steady, do your job like you didn't know him? Keep calm in the possibility of him flatlining, of us losing him?"

" I... I-"

"Your hesitation is all the answer I need. I know how hard this is, believe me, I do, but this is what's best. You'll get in the way and hinder my ability, lessen the chance of us saving this boys life."

There was a gentle touch on her shoulder, and she glanced over to see James had quietly snuck up behind her, placing a warm hand upon her shoulder, a soft yet clear message that this wasn't an argument she was going to win.

Or _should_  win, for that matter.

"You know he's right." James uttered softly  
"He's the best bet Louis has right now. I know it goes against everything within you to leave his side right now, but we _have_ to go, leave the professionals to it."

"They'll do all they can. You know they will" Violet adds, and it's only when Clementine hears the croak in her voice that she glances up at her face to see it shining with shed tears, a harsh reminder that she wasn't the only one fearing for Louis' life.

Or perhaps, already grieving for him.

With a heavy heart and with what she hopes isn't one last look to the father of her child, the only man she's ever loved, the only man she thinks, no, is _sure_ she'll _ever_ love, she lets AJ's comforting grip on her hand and James still calming touch on her shoulder steer her out of the room, and out of reach.


End file.
